orbiter juggling is a sport

I assume it's similar to how men keep the women they're juggling in check, which is basically being nice and friendly while at the same time making clear that the relationship isn't exclusive through their actions.

So, I think the "orbiter" solution is genuine friendship + fucking someone else in an obvious way and being clear about what you want.

If they want to walk away (side piece or orbiter) then you gotta let them

>>16908721
>i don't know how to be honest
>i don't have the lady parts to just tell the orbiters it ain't gonna happen
>but i still want their attention
>wat do

>>16908754
That's the problem, faggot. I am honest and they still cling to me. They know from the start that they're going to be friendzoned but the infatuation blooms anyways.

>>16908745
Even when I tell them I'm not available, they say I'm the coolest/hottest/most fun girl they've ever met. It's flattering but at the same time it's heartbreaking to watch them get hurt because of me. I don't want to break off friendships just because they're crushing on me.

It's particularly shitty when the people involved are genuinely good guys. Should I just tell people I'm a guy? What is it like to be a man on the internet?

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>>16908777
>>16908795
This only gets deeper. There's no escape. No infatuation like this ends, they won't find another partner if this has already gone on too far. If another person shows interest, they'll reject it or ignore it.
Their mental states will deteriorate, slowly but surely, until one of the following things will happen.
1: They'll kill someone you're involved with.
2: They'll kill you.
3: They'll kill themselves.
4: They'll threaten to kill themselves unless you love them.

This can turn into a slow, gradual manipulation where they even go as far as to hurt themselves to get your pity, to try and get you to realize that there's no happiness for them without you, and to try and get you to believe that it's not so bad with them.

You need to remove them for themselves and you.
Don't wait 3 years 3 months to break it off like my friend did. I'm still recovering 17 months later, and she's no happier now that she did it. Which is the opposite of what I wanted, but you know.

I'm expected to just 'let go', when there is no letting go. There is no 'letting go' for some.

wait, I'm confused

do you want them to be orbiters? or do you want them to be friends?

>>16908863
Friends. The orbiting thing just happens.

>>16908850
>I'm expected to just 'let go', when there is no letting go. There is no 'letting go' for some.

Oh please fuck off. In real life most people are normies and you're an unfortunate and RARE exception. Society shouldn't have to cater to the lowest common denominator, you're in charge of your own fucking life, people around you shouldn't have to alter their behavior to deal with your obsessive retardation.

They don't just think they can you, they think they will date you. They really, truly, honestly believe it's in the cards. You need to reject them.

get fucking mad at them. be livid. Make a list of everything that pisses you off about the situation

Tell them that you can't take them seriously when they look at you with puppy eyes
Tell them that you can't trust them to hold you responsible for your own bullshit
Tell them that you don't want to be their fucking princess
Tell them that their compliments make your skin crawl

Then after you have properly exploded, tell them "I'm leaving right now, because I can't stand hanging around you when you act like this"

The point is to reject them, then give them time/space to internalize the rejection. The good friends among them will get it, take some time away from you to reconsider what their life is without you, then they will come back in a more normal capacity.

you really shouldn't feel bad about this, because right now it's not actually a friendship. It seems like friendship to you, but it isn't.

>>16908956
>think they can *date* you

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>>16908875
I never said that they should have to. I said the exact opposite of that.

The only reason it hurts is because it makes no logical sense to me. I'm aware this sounds like Elliot Rodger-tier delusion, but I assure you, it is not. It was confirmed by two mental health professionals as well as many others around me, and is logical fact.

I was the best candidate for her, and I put a lot of effort into becoming that best candidate. I'm 6'5, which speaks for itself, I have strength. I'm extremely academically capable, I got into uni at 16. I'm extremely passionate and I wanted to make her very very happy. I bought her gifts that meant a lot to her, and I was there when she needed me.
She still chose other people, which made me feel completely worthless that I couldn't do this one thing in my life. Even when I outclassed everyone else.
It hurt her and me very badly.

Yes, I am unfortunate and rare. Because I have a very capable intellect, am very passionate and considerate, and a strong sense of moral justice. I also evaluate myself logically to remove any room for delusion or bias, which is something lost on the majority of people.

I can already tell you're not going to read or believe the first part, that says I confirmed this with MANY OTHER PEOPLE, so I don't care if you call me a Supreme Gentleman or whatever.

I didn't let go, and am finding it hard to, because she is the best for me. I'm the best for her.
Nobody else will do as much to make her happy as I would, and nobody else will make me as happy as she will.

I honestly don't know why people put up with this unless they are really good friends with the person or something. I had an "orbiter", this guy would not stop hitting on me and trying to dissuade me from dating the guy I was seeing at the time even after I told him to stop multiple times. Guess what i did? Told him we couldn't be friends anymore because he was being an ass. Set boundaries or be uncomfortable for the rest of your life

>>16908971
>I also evaluate myself logically to remove any room for delusion or bias
>I was the best candidate for her
>Nobody else will do as much to make her happy as I would, and nobody else will make me as happy as she will.

You can't possibly know that and the fact that you think its just 'logical fact' speaks wonders for your obsession. I'm glad this girl cut you out because you seem the type to cut her hair in the middle of the night to add to your shrine.

Heres a tip: Don't lay it on so thick next time champ. Treat women like people and not like idols of worship. And definitely don't pretend like you know whats best for a person, especially in areas of romance. Seek help, please, because I'm afraid the next girl you obsess over might end up under your floorboards.

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>>16909090
Maybe I can't know that, but I have great reason to conclude as such. It's highly probable from my unbiased as possible point of view.

I laid it on thick as my mental state deteriorated to try to force her to double down. I was smooth and gentle at the start, and I didn't want to marry her after knowing her for 2 weeks. This built on itself in the timeframe of a normal partnership.

I don't worship people. I told the truth to her when she could hear it. I was a stellar 10/10 friend, her words not mine, not some of the other orbiters she had, of both genders, who were threatening suicide constantly. Compared to them I'm basically perfect.

I wouldn't cut her hair. She was growing it out for charity, and on top of that, I loved her hair. It was beautiful.

I severely doubt I would hurt the next person I love.
I just don't want them to leave.
Few understand this idea.

My last mental health professional decided there was nothing more he could do, more or less, I'm sick of trying.
Don't you think I don't like what this does to me? There is no escape from this. There's no relief or respite. I'd do anything to make her love me that way.

>>16909147
>get called out on "I'm not biased" bullshit
>immediately double down on "I'm not biased"
stop cocking up this thread

>>16909156
Of course I am. I do my very best to remove the bias and see things objectively. Delusions weren't going to help me get her.
I used other people's perspectives to balance out my own.
Lern 2 reed

>>16908971
>autism

Is there something about having a fucking vagina that magically compels you to be as indirect and ambiguous as possible?
You're (presumably) a grown ass woman. Act like one. You take their friendship, tell them "no" when they try to do ANYTHING that goes outside of a platonic relationship, and then cut ties when they keep pressing.

Have you ever seen a Bill Burr show? A guy's dick is like a third base coach that doesn't hold anyone up. "GO GO GO! Oh shit, she's coming! Slide Slide Slide!" It ain't your fault, and it ain't their fault. It's biology. The difference between a man who can be successful friends with a female and a man who can't is usually that the former is already fucking someone.

There's also my case, where you're so fucked backwards sexually deviant that the only thing that really gets your jimmies going is a sand paper blowjob while watching Japanese comedy shows, but that's beside the point.

you fucking bitches disgust me.

>>16909168
What else is new? At least I have a job. Unlike you, most likely. And if I decided to kill myself I'd buy an AK and go fight ISIL, also probably unlike you.

I just wanted love from my best friend.

Based OP making all of these R9K idiots mad.

Thank you so much

>>16909180

>resorts to assumptions and personal attacks when confronted
>implying you would be allowed to buy a gun

No wonder your therapist gave up, you're bonkers.

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>>16909237

>beta orbiters getting this mad

Not a big surprise.

>>16909237
>implying I'm not bright enough to cover my tracks
>implying my real mental state is visible on public record

>>16909240
I sincerely hope you aren't referring to me. Because I'm not mad.
Just sad right now.

>>16909282

I am referring to the people in this thread getting triggered at OPs post.

not having friends

>>16909167
Guess what. She wasn't attracted to you. Who cares if you think you were the perfect partner? She didn't agree. Get the fuck over yourself. You can be the most successful person in the world and if the person doesn't feel a connection or is attracted to you, you're shit outta luck. Get more help.

>>16909505
She did agree. And she did have a connection to me, that's why she trusted me as much as she did.

That's why it hurt so bad.

I have better insurance coming into policy from my employer in about 4 weeks. I'll see then.
Thank you for being a good output for this.

>>16908795
No offense to you, but in my experience, guys will say that to pretty much any girl. It's just to sow the small chance.

Don't take it to heart.

>>16908971
Yikes son, I feel your pain, but love don't obey no logic.

>>16908971
Bro u sound so fucking entitled. Everyone thinks they are someone's best match.

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>>16908971

I am keking at your situation anon.

Thanks for the le epic cringe.

>>16908971

you sound like a narcissistic creep. you don't get a gf with a resume, bitch

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>>16909705
You're welcome :)

>>16909698
Sense of entitlement =/= Sense of betrayal.

>>16909711
I'm aware of that, and you seem illiterate, as I even said that I know that. :)

>>16909691
Unfortunately.

How do I get orbiters? I'm a 25 year old married guy and I feel lonely only having my wife for company (guys are gross and not worth my time). What should I do to seem sort of available? Take off the ring?