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I want badly to be able to experience life in the present, as

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I want badly to be able to experience life in the present, as it's happening. So far, my life has been dictated by predictions and anxiety that I can sometimes escape from in order to act as I know I really want to, without thinking through every possibility beforehand.

I understand it's not possible to completely rid myself of, but I'd like to escape my mind at will. It ruins my creativity, sense of humor, and confidence.

Meditation is difficult and a bit confusing but I get the gist of it. Does anyone have experience with what I'm talking about and how to achieve it?
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Take this
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not op, bumping for answers
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>>16906533
Could you clarify a bit further what exactly it is you're trying to learn about? I'm willing to give advice, but OP's post left me a bit confounded.
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>>16906575

how do i retain sanity in the present moment instead of being disconnected between past and the future?
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>>16905906
This is OP. If anyone is still willing to answer me, to clarify, I just want to be able to shut down the conscious mind or evaluating part of it. So that there is no delay time between thought and talk or thought and idea.

I guess the "ego".
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