It feels like I'm lying about my depression. Am I delusional or actually depressed?
eh
maybe
You might be exaggerating and over focusing on your feelings. Wrong analysis type thing I think.
Think about the words your using and try to not use the word depressed. You might just be too stuck on that word. Try elaborating like is it nervousness? anxiety? if so why? are you upset? if so what triggered it? lack of exitement? what do you currently do? tired?
>>16860555
Yes, I'm nervous and frigidity. I'm a student now and I hate being around people, I can't handle the pressure, so I lock my self up in my house when I'm not in class. I'm mostly tired and yes probably due to my lack on enthusiasm for anything. I just however feel like I'm fine and normal and I'm making this up to feel like I have a point to exist.
>>16860574
fidgety not frigidity
>>16860574
>hate being around people
Is it because people are stupid and they make you mad? is it because you don't want to get embarrassed if you say the wrong thing in the crowd? is it because you think they'll attack you? Does this happen in public like in like a Starbucks with people you don't know and won't interact with or just in peer groups?
>>16860574
Such feelings are common in depression. Your true question should be whether or not your depression is the cause of your problems or the symptom of it.
From what you've said it sounds more to me like you have really bad anxiety. You're probably the kind of person that thinks people talk shit about you behind your back and make jokes about you when you're done talking to them. Because of this you like to hide in your room to recover but it just makes you feel bad because all you're doing is prolonging the problem.
Try to get to the root of your anxiety or get medication for it. I guarantee if you can learn how to be sociable and enjoy the company of other people you'll stop feeling so lethargic and scared.
>>16860582
It's mostly because I think people are stupid. It's in public places, around unfamiliar people. Restaurants are the worst place for me, I feel like everyone is watching me, waiting for me to make a mistake.
>>16860597
Have you tried to see a psychologist?
>>16860597
Sounds more like anxiety to me.
>>16860594
Thanks, This helps a lot, seriously. I feel like this i a correct representation of what I'm feeling. To be honest if it weren't for my anxiety I would mostly be happy. I don't really feel like people are making jokes it's more I'm paranoid they are watching me.
>>16860600
I already booked an appointment through my GP. I told him I was depressed, and it now feels like I'm lying. Because life has been routine, I'm not too sad right now, but if something weird happens again I'll feel crap for 1-2 weeks. What I'm scared of now is that my avoidant behavior will prevent me from even visiting the psychologist.
>>16860615
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emotional_Freedom_Techniques
I would try tapping. I am currently seeing a psychologist who talked about tapping certain parts of your body while thinking of stuff that bothers you. I thought this lady was nuts but I think it's actually helping calm me down. It might be pure %100 placebo but hey, whatever works.
>set up appointment with counselor through school
>feel confident that I'll finally get the help I need
>get anxious about how the counselor will respond and what if it doesn't help me fix myself
>decide to lay in bed and stare at the ceiling instead
>>16860538
How could we possibly know the answer to that?
>>16860625
Didn't expect a straight answer, sort of wanted some discussion because the thought that I was lying was consuming me.
>>16860624
Did you ever end up going?
>>16860632
Nah, this was a couple weeks ago and I feel too embarrassed to call and schedule again. I know it'll be the same woman that answers the phone and schedules a time for me and she'll recognize me by my name and student ID and that bothers me for some reason. Plus they don't do same day appointments and are never open at night when I'm most awake and most negative.
>>16860621
Strange, but I'll try it for the time being.
>>16860638
I can empathize, especially with the night time thing. Everything is worse at night if your not distracted and just trying to relax. I booked my appointment two weeks ago, they seem really busy. Just find someone else to talk to, I never really liked school counselors anyway.