I can't sleep, I can't wake up

File: 20151119_113200.jpg (1MB, 2560x1536px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 2560x1536px

I couldn't find the old ones/couldn't reply. I've tried everything. I can't fall asleep at night, I can't get up in the morning. It's nothing I'm stressed about. I don't lie awake thinking about anything. It's absolute silence inside my head and I only fall asleep after midnight. If I get in bed at 5:00 pm, I'm still awake by midnight so I wake up at 7:35. I'm supposed to be up by six thirty so I should be dead by 10:30. It doesn't matter when I'm in bed or what I do. If I read a book I drop the book on my face at midnight. If I do nothing, I watch the clock until midnight. If I do the breathing trick, I count my breaths until midnight. If I look at my phone, I pass out at 2 am. Doesn't matter how tired I am, I can't sleep. Indian alarm clock just makes me piss myself. Noises don't wake me up anymore. In fact, if I'm cooking something and I use my phone's alarm as a timer, my food burns. I'ts like my brain convinced me that the alarm clock sound is a hallucination or recollection rather than a reality they warrants reaction. Sometimes when I hear it, it makes me drowsy, not enough to actually knock me out, but enough to make me useless. Math alarms made me able to do math in my sleep. I tune out everything.

Even physical force doesn't work. I told my roomie to slap me once. He's my brother too, so he has more than enough motivation, and I still slept in. He told me after the fact that he dislocated his shoulder from hitting me so hard. I didn't even feel it.

People talking makes the dream more convoluted.

Sleep cycles just wakes me up (admittedly restfully) at 8 am.

Help me.