ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

Is chemistry usually mutual?

>>16779595
No. Mismatched chemistry is overwhelmingly the usual case. That's why we have to date many people instead of selecting our perfect matches at random on the street. It's a somewhat rare and special accident to meet someone with whom we click together.

>>16779595
Tempted to say yes, but the anons having absolutely no skills in resding people are in the majority so i'm going to go with "mostly".

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>>16779608
=(

What's the worst thing in a guys past you could still forgive him for if you found out after you started dating?

>>16779619
That's not really a sad thing. Think of how many women you've met in your life who, despite being decent people, never made you feel "I fucking LOVE this person's company." Should they feel bad because the most you could muster toward them was civility and decency? It's not anyone's fault. You just didn't dig their company.

Well that's just as likely to be what happens when a woman meets you. It's not some disaster. You might find them absolutely delightful while they're just not feeling it. Everyone has their own tastes. You shrug and move on. Eventually you meet someone who enjoys you as much as you enjoy them. Those are the matches you develop for as long as they'll go.

The thing is that i find girls that i'm interested in and we hang out and text/talk.
But most of the times when i try to make a move, a lot of them respond with
>Oh i thought you where Gay
or
>I just thought we would be friends

I don't get it, this happens a lot. I'm not very gay like imo but for some reason girls see me as gay.
Anything i'm doing wrong?
Or do they just say that to make it more easy for them to decline me?

>>16779639
Sounds like you got to make moves sooner. Or flirt more.

>>16779632
Can you give a list?

>>16779633
It sucks cause you gotta be on your A game, leading things so this rare unicorn gets to be with you an equally rare unicorn.

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Femanons.

Male pattern baldness. I'm not as far gone as pic related and I cut my hair real short. Is it that much of a turnoff?

>>16779695
"Unicorn" is a huge exaggeration. I'd say that it's more around 1 in 10. On average out of every 10 people you date, 1 of them will feel the same instant spark that you do. And remember how odds work: that person is just as liable to be the first date as the tenth date. I think you can survive biding your time for somewhere between one and ten dates.

>>16779706
Are you the guy that posted the infographic in the last thread? Because this is far worse than you made it sound there.

girls and boys

I'm quite naive since I have absolutely no experience with love, sex and affection but I'll ask anyway.Is promiscuity a typical behavior of teenage and 20's or it has no age? My father after his divorce fucked tons of women but I wonder if he is the exception or that's what happens to many divorced men and women

>>16779725
It has no age. Apparently STD rates among the elderly are a big issue because they don't really think about protection. You know how STDs spread? Promiscuity.

>>16779706
a friend of mine suffers hair loss since the age of 16, situation was getting worse so he decided to go bald. His dating life is ok since he is a good player.

Have any of you lied about yourself to be with another person? How has it turned out?

Example:
>guy says he only dates Japanese girls, but you were a Korean pretending to be Japanese
>girl says she only dates successful men, so you lied about being a lawyer or engineer
>guy only dates women under 25, but you were actually 27, pretending to be 24
How far were you able to carry your lie? Did you break up because you were caught, or for unrelated reasons?

>>16779756
Why the fuck would I lie about something that stupid? Why would I even want to be with someone who 'only dates XYZ' and won't date anyone else?

>>16779760
Sometimes people will do crazy things for some pussy/dick. I'm specifically asking these crazy people in particular.

>>16779713
>I'm not as far gone as pic related >>16779706
Yes

>>16779748
I buzz at the shortest setting.

Maybe the fact that I'm 6'2", 240 lbs and almost shaven head is the problem?

>>16779767
Post a pic of your own hair

>>16779711
>I'd say that it's more around 1 in 10.
Man I'd love for that to be the case. I've been single for a bit over 2 years now and I've only met one woman I was really interested in. Naturally, she was taken.

>>16779773
So for the 1 in 10 thing to be wrong, that means you also dated 19 other women apart from the one you mentioned. Right? 19 other dates?

>>16779772
nope.sh
Not gonna happen.

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>>16779784
>that means you also dated 19 other women apart from the one you mentioned. Right? 19 other dates?
Something like that I guess? I didn't count them, but I've generally forced myself to leave the house and try to go on a date or two every month.

i want to ask this girl out. Our personalities are similar and we get along quite well.

But I'm also a dateless kissless virgin, at an age where that is very strange.

When should I tell her that? Should I even tell her that? I feel like beginning a relationship with her without telling her would be less than truthful. But once we began a relationship, she might be understanding as to why I have no fucking idea what I'm doing.

tl;dr when should I tell a girl I'd like to date I have zero experience?

Are uncircumcised penises really that much of a turn-off?

I've never been circumcised when I was a baby, and I refuse to do it now because I think it's immoral.

>>16779860
>when should I tell a girl I'd like to date I have zero experience?
Never. Just wing the date and kissing and hope for the best.

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Dudes who are not handholdingless kissless virgins:

My fiancé has been receiving lewd images from his exgf and hiding it from me. When I caught him, he lied. When I told him I knew he was lying, he lied for a few hours more before breaking down and telling the truth.

Also revealed that he snooped out my bff's nudes on her blog, and a few other things I legit can't even remember

My question is more of a confirmation...

He can't possibly really love me, right? Not in a mature, marriage potential kind of way?

I've suspected for a long time that I was deluding myself seeing him as groom material, and now with this lying revealed, I'm pic related

>>16779887
Not even close.

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>>16779896
I've waited three days since I found this out to ask about it online because I knowwwwwww what the internet advice people will say. I know what I would say.

I'm too weak for this to be my reality, I'm too pathetic to figure out what to do now

>>16779869
no dude but im in a country where only 4% of the population is circumcised because what the actual fuck is wrong with america. just pull the foreskin back ffs

>>16779887
All heterosexual men look at porn. The only difference is that he's looking at porn of people he knows.

Unless he's actually cheating on you with either one of these people, I wouldn't worry about it.

What makes a guy seem boring to women?

>>16779905
He's not interesting

Honestly, what do girls think of a virgin man? Do they find it a turn on that they have never been with anybody before and want to take their V card, or do they think the guy is pathetic since he's never had sex before?

>>16779903
Yeah I don't give a shit about him looking at porn. I do care about him providing emotional support to his retarded pregnant ex in return for kinky pictures.

>>16779887
Then tell me, what is real love? Did you never find any other guy attractive? Do you always imagine your bf when you have sex with him? Where do you draw the line? He finds it attractive, and finds you boring, as you can't always be attracted to just one person. The question is, is he willing to quit that, or will you accept it as a part of him.

>>16779900
Well then you came to the wrong place. Advice is feedback to be acted upon. If you're incapable of action then you need to let someone else make decisions for you entirely. This place is for people who can do stuff for themselves.

>>16779909
The OP exists for people like you.

>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.

>>16779900
>I'm too weak for this to be my reality, I'm too pathetic to figure out what to do now
Shut up, don't put yourself in a victimized position to convince yourself it's not your responsibility if you go back to him.
Make your choice and live with the consequences, don't excuse yourself with being "weak" or "pathetic" or "too strong" or "always wrong". Make your fucking choice and live with it.

>>16779887
As a handholding fucking kissing dude, I can say yeah he's got some ego issues. Deep seated thingies preventing him from living in the moment and being happy with what is. He probably loves you, but he probably doesn't love himself. Break off the marriage, you dont have to break up, but you gotta see if he can gain the ability to fully express whats in his heart without getting confused.

>>16779913
Oh shut up, I'm venting, obviously I will figure out something to do

>>16779911
We have (had?) an open relationship. I used to camwhore, there are literally hundreds if not thousands of pictures of me naked out there, which he looks at frequently. He also looks at other porn too.

The problem is the lie. And lying MORE when caught.

And betraying my friend's trust by going out of his way to find her nudes.

>>16779929
>We have (had?) an open relationship. I used to camwhore, there are literally hundreds if not thousands of pictures of me naked out there
Oh, in that case it would be better to call the whole thing off.

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>>16779921
>He probably loves you, but he probably doesn't love himself.
Ouch, yeah, that's probably exactly it. He says, and I believe this, that he isn't particularly attracted to this chick in any way. She's been obsessed with him since the second grade and he's taking advantage of her and why the fuck am I even considering marrying a man who would do that behind my back and then lie when I was forced to confront him about it?

>>16779929
>open relationship crashes and burns

erry time

>>16779974
B-but monogamy is artificial and polygamy is how humans are supposed to be! Hypergamy proves it!

>>16779974
She's a trainwreck. $10 says this has been going on for years and some STD she caught from him has already left her sterile.

>>16779974
It's so fucked. I was the one who wanted an open relationship. I've never exercised the rights to it. He once slept with another chick in our bed after I OK'd the sex and clarified "anywhere but in our bed"

>>16779977
Lol forever alones. Don't even know what hypergamy means. You know every relationship that's not exclusive is polygamous. Just cause she's dating someone doesn't mean she's not fucking someone else.

>>16780012
Did you actually at any point specify that it wasn't open anymore?

Because if you didn't nothing he did was wrong besides the lying and since we are only hearing one perspective chances are you were pressuring him or something and that's why he lied.
And looking at your friends nudes isn't betraying anyone's trust, don't put stuff in the internet if you don't want people to look at it.

Anyways the relationship is obviously over so just deal with it.

>>16779632
My boyfriend smoked weed once, got drunk once, and smoked a few cigarettes all back in early high school

Not saying that those things are "bad" things, just things that would otherwise make us incompatible if he had done more or continued to do them today.

Some guy roasted my girl and it made me feel insecure about her. That's pretty fucked up, I know, I'm not dating her for her looks anyways but how am I supposed to react to a guy shit talking my s/o?

>>16780068
By ignoring him. He can have his opinions but he ought to have enough class to keep them to himself.

>>16780072
I agree about the ignoring, she also agrees, but I was curious how people here would retaliate to that

>>16779706
embrace it bro! my dad was balding for hecka years and wasn't really getting anything and as soon as he shaved his head he was getting hit on left and right. of course facial structures and shit are involved too but I think most people would prefer bald>balding. also it makes your head fun to rub.

>>16779860
never because
>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.
also if you've ever watched porn in your life you'll have some idea of what to do.
Read the OP before posting

I get a boner when I talk/text/chat with a woman I like and find attractive.

Is this normal?

>>16780082
I wouldn't. It doesn't make sense to recognize that someone is beneath you and then stoop down to their level anyway.

>>16780068
if someone talk shit about my gf in front of me and her, i'd just punch him real hard.
If he do it by internet or text or some shit, i wouldnt even bother, i expect my gf to be a woman enough to defend herself in thoses kind of situation

>>16779860
My boyfriend was 25 when we started dating. We were making out in his car, getting touchy feely and he decided that was when he'd tell me "I've only ever made out with a girl once". We continued that conversation in the backseat.

>>16779887
though I was in highschool at the time, I was basically in the same situation.
>wanted nudes of her friends, shit like that
>would feel the urge to cheat, though never did (I'm assuming that's his case as well)
at the end of the day I realized she annoyed the fuck out of me. sit down and talk to him about the two of you, maybe even write down a list of pros and cons of each other to see if there's any significant problem that may be causing him to look elsewhere (and also any other ways to enhance your relationship)
Most relationships fail from a lack of communication, so you'd better get this shit sorted out before you have any regrets post-marriage.

>>16780120
This happened to me as well. It's fucking shitty but you've either got to
A: pull dick to waistband in a blink of an eye or
B: focus on not being aroused when you would be implicitly
B is the more permanent solution, and worked for me.

I'll start working on myself again, I'm less insecure already, I can talk to people (finally) and I'll get in shape, should I look for a girl right now or wait until I'm in shape and "ready"?
Women, would you date a guy who is improving although he isn't exactly good looking or great right now, or would you rather have him wait until he's done with said self improvement?

>>16780120
Yeah, happens to me all the time.

>>16780156
>should I look for a girl
never actively look for a GF.
just chill, be yourself, and interact with others (this means girls, too) if you do that and stumble across someone you're interested in go for it (most of the time things start out as friends, not usually from 0 to boning in a day). don't worry about rejection, because you can't make the shots you don't take.

>>16780181
>never actively look for a GF.
Well, I'd have to go out and interact with people, that's what I meant. I don't really do that right now, so that would basically be "looking for a GF" in a sense. Like going to a bar or a club every fortnight to maybe meet new people.
As for my original question, maybe I have to clarify, do women see the potential in someone or do they just see them as they are? I'm not ugly, I'm just terribly out of shape, in a year or two I could be quite handsome. Would women see that while I'm on my journey or not?

I still can't understand flirting and how to show an attraction towards a woman without saying things completely bluntly and literally asking them just like that.

I've tried reading about the stuff but learning about it is difficult due to my dyslexia being in the way, my only male friend can't be a wing-man since he's not interested in women yet, and I'm constantly losing motivation.

Girls, would you date a guy who owns guns?

Consider the following:
>he only uses them for lawful sporting purposes (hunting, range shooting, skeet shooting, IPSC, etc.)
>he doesn't conceal carry
>he wants to take you to a range at some point
>he is capable of carrying a conversation about any subject besides guns
>he does have other hobbies
>he is just a normal guy who happens to own guns

>>16780205
Sure, as long as he's not weird about them in some way or has mental issues I don't see it as an issue. Not even american by the way, European and I'd still be okay with it.

>>16780201
Then you should just stick to being blunt and literal. Obviously that's not going to work much of the time, but sometimes it will. At least it comes naturally to you. Sooner or later you have to take life's lemons and make the lemonade. Worked for Feynman.

>>16780201
>my only male friend can't be a wing-man since he's not interested in women yet
>yet
Are you really young or is he just, you know, maybe not interested in women at all?

Okay say theres this girl I sleep next to every night in the same twin bed but we havent done anything. How do I escalate things. She lets me touch her ass but seems to have an aversion to touching her breast.

>>16780205
No. Philosophically it doesn't make any sense to me. Making a sport out of a weapon is absurd and it candy-coats the brutal and savage history behind it. The only aspect to gun use is the hunting you mentioned, but I doubt you're doing so out of a need for sustenance. On a practical level, the risks of accidental or intentional injury are just awful. I want no part of that in my life.

>>16780232
How do you even get into that situation

>>16780238
>Making a sport out of a weapon is absurd and it candy-coats the brutal and savage history behind it.
So I take it you don't like fencing, kendo, and geomdo either?

Why do women keep complaining about things that are easily fixable, and then get mad when you give them advice on how to fix it?

>>16780248
I don't know what geomdo is but you're right about the other two. People have done and continue to do horrible things to each other with weapons and it's sickening. I understand that most anything can be an improvised weapon but these are designed for harm.

>>16780232
Go for her neck and lower back. Those more sensitive zones than the ass and then she might give in after. Or shes just an ass girl and is self conscious about her tits

>>16780251
Women aren't rational.

When they are complaining about a thing like that, they aren't looking for a solutions, they are looking for emotional support.

>>16780261
But they do realize that the more they complain about something trivialor seek sympathy, the less people start to care, right?

>>16780266
Nope

>girl sends me a stockphoto of a naked dude, asking "you like? Or should I keep this to girl friends"
>"{I'm} not that kind of guy, but thanks I guess"
>"didn't have the girl version on me"
>"you could've taken the girl version :p"
>"I look horrible on photos"
>"you could've fooled me. Me too"
Right after that she changed the subject to something completely unrelated and out of the blue, and after a few generic exchanges she stopped responding.

We're casual friends who see each other somewhat regularly and hang out, though we never actually met up outside of that. Kind of attracted to her, but I'm not really intending on taking it seriously.

Did I go too far here? Does this sound like she's shooting me down?

>seeing a girl
>make plans for our next outing
>day before: sorry, im sick, lets try again next week
>next week: shit, my period started, im not leaving bed this weekend
>the week after that: family drama, sorry
>a month after the initial plan: go out

this loop has repeated a few times now. like i get that family drama can be shitty, periods can be shitty, people can get sick. but this is happening a bit too much and going out only once a month isn't cutting it for me

am i being unreasonable here?

>>16780271
eh, you were fine, she kind of spaghetti'd out. She might like you or she's offended, you'll notice the next time you see her. Nothing to worry about.

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25 years old never touched a female.
There's an obese 31 year old I met online. Not a dating site, just a forum. Totally wants the D.
My work is seasonal and I know I'll be unemployed soon, I told her I "might be able to come visit" her when I'm not working.

Should I fuck her?
+Lose virginity, gain confidence, never have to see her again
-waste it on a fat ugly older woman, regret may actually lower my confidence

I kind of want to because I'm so ashamed of my inexperience at this age, but I also don't even like her, there's nothing mutual here, it's all just her jumping my bones. Probably as old and undesirable as I am I should just do it since I have no opportunity anywhere else.

But she's grossss

>>16780205
Only if his guns weren't semi-automatic or otherwise stupidly overpowered for said lawful sporting purposes. And only if he kept them safely stored at all times when not in use.

Also as long as he didn't force me into touching or holding them. I may well choose to one day, a shooting range even sounds fun, but if he kept trying to pressure me into it before I'm good and ready to handle a weapon I would dump him faster than an angry rattle snake.

(Non-American femanon btw)

>>16780106
I'm 30 years old and I've never been on a date before. I assume discussion of previous relationship experience is fairly standard conversation

My question wasn't "would she date me if I'm a virgin" it was "should I tell her I've never dated?"

If you really think the difference is meaningless that's fair, but my question feels very different than the OP.

>>16780291
You don't want to. So don't. That'd be fucking stupid.

>>16780228
>maybe not interested in women at all?

His power level is too high at the moment so yes.

>>16780293
youre a wizard, you should be happy

>>16780299
Buddy, I think that was "is he gay for men?"

>>16780304
2D>3D isn't all that different

It's just drawings instead of dicks

>>16780220
>blunt and literal
>Inb4 rape in verbal form

>>16780246
Its weird. We made out once and I rubbed her breast and ass. Then I never stopped rubbing her ass.
>>16780260
She probably wont let me kiss her neck. Do you mean rub it.

As an overweight male, am I overstepping my boundaries by seeking thin/average women to date?

I am in the middle of losing weight (recently lost 14 pounds, shit is so cash), but should I put a hold on seeking women until I've lost more? I estimate that if I lose another 40 pounds, I will be considered "normal" again.

I am unwilling to date overweight women unless they want to go to the gym with me.

>>16780334
I think you're in the same boat as: >>16780156 (more or less).
It's only natural that you'd want a slim GF, but as long as you're overweight you better be one hell of an amazing person to make up for that (or find a woman who is into overweight men, they do exist even though they're rarities).

>>16780327
No, how did you end up sleeping in a same bed with your friend?

Who owns the house?

Like what the fuck

>>16780378
She comes over and hangs out for hours a day and doesnt always go home.

>>16780392
Just put her to sleep in the couch or something. Why are you trying to grope your friend

>>16780405
He said that they made out already, I doubt that she's just a friend. If we assume that he's a bit younger then this isn't too weird honestly.

>>16780405
not looking for a solution to where she sleeps
>>16780410
Currently friend with very slight benefits. Trying to get a few more. Not even going for sex. Ideally I could get her comfortable enough to be naked around me but sexually at most I just want a handjob though I wouldnt refuse a blowjob if a girl offered. Its just nice being able to relieve a bit of horniness on someone I trust.
Its hard to explain accurately and Im not sure what shes thinking.

>>16780427
She wouldn't come over if it bothered her, I'm fairly certain. Maybe she's just not comfortable enough for more or isn't sure, have you talked about this stuff? At all? How old are you two?

>>16780440
Im 22. Shes 21. Ive seen her naked before (except for her panties). Shes let me strip her twice.
She gives shy vibes. Like if I talk about it shes going to retreat and pretty much say nothing is okay. I havent asked for more. I just asked if I was bothering her once and she said it was fine.

>>16780453
Well, she probably likes you but is really shy or insecure about her body/breasts. If she doesn't want to do more at this point then you'll obviously have to respect that, but maybe she just doesn't want to do more because she doesn't know whether or not you'll be in a relationship or not after it.

>>16780490
>No Im pretty sure she doesnt like me.
She hangs out with you for hours, then sleeps over, in the same bed, you made out before, she was naked in front of you before and she lets you feel up her ass. If she doesn't like you in some way then I have absolutely no clue what's going on and can't help you.

>>16780470
No Im pretty sure she doesnt like me. Shes just fairly comfortable around me. Just not that comfortable.

Is Male Virginity still frowned upon?

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I don't know if I should pursue this. We've been on 5+ dates, but I don't feel like we're dating. It's gotten to the point where I avoid her because I don't know what to do with her. She never wants to just relax at one another's place, and I can't afford to be going out every time. She's also said quote related about sex, which I need in a stable relationship. I don't know if means sex is an eventuality, or if it's never gonna happen. If It's the former, I'm all good, the latter I can't do.

Thoughts, feedback or advice?

"Ok. So, the reason why, is because I'm kinda scared. I want to but at the same time I don't. It's always been a bad experience for me, and I do really like you, and I don't want you to think I'm not interested, I just find it hard to put my full trust into someone sometimes because it scares me that I might actually be falling for someone unsure emoticon"

Is confidence really an absolutely positively mandatory in getting a GF?

I find this extremely hard to believe, or is this more US propaganda bullshit?

Yes, I really am dead serious, this sounds like complete and utter bullshit to me.

>>16780608
Well I'm not going to want to date someone who's insecure and unhappy with themselves now, am I? And it's not just about getting a girlfriend either, your whole life will improve if you're confident.

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I have highly abnormal sexual stamina that leads to me having long sex and cumming long after any of my partners.
How do I go about convincing the current girl I'm sleeping with to bring in another women?
Mind you she loves the sex and can't stop talking about it but I'm tired of only cumming once if I'm lucky and having her throw in the towel because of my stamina.
Ladies how would you feel about this?

>>16780591
>Ok. So, the reason why, is because I'm kinda scared. I want to but at the same time I don't. It's always been a bad experience for me, and I do really like you, and I don't want you to think I'm not interested, I just find it hard to put my full trust into someone sometimes because it scares me that I might actually be falling for someone unsure emoticon

this is grade A bullshit. if she wont commit, leave before youre too deep

>>16780591
She literally is falling for someone unsure. Her fear, in this case, is absolutely true. Do you think she can't tell you are avoiding her, and are on the fence like this?
You clearly don't want to pursue a relationship with her.

>>16780608
Not entirely, but you have to at least be confident about something. Even if you aren't confident in your approach, if you can speak about your field of study or career with confidence that's a plus
If you are just a mass of insecurities...like, some people WANT a partner they can help, but not everyone.

>>16780277
bumpin

I've got a girl I'm going to try to "hangout" with tomorrow afternoon.

Does it make any difference whether I text her to see if she wants to tonight or tomorrow morning?

>>16780662
Ask her tonight

>>16780660
>but you have to at least be confident about something

And here I thought I needed to be confident about absolutely everything I have to do just to have a healthy body.

>>16780647
>>16780638
But I do want to commit. I don't know how to. I feel uncomfortable touching her because appears like she doesn't like it, and I've never been in a relationship without lots of physical contact. I need cuddles and sex. I don't mean PDA.

>>16780246

Not that anon, but the friendzone is very real and it can go to some very weird, torturous places. I've slept half naked with the girl of my dreams in my own bed. We spooned. She also completely rejected every other thing I tried.

>>16780672
No, I don't think that's true. Everyone has some insecurities. Some even have a lot. But as long as you are secure in some area in a way you can display, I think that's a good sign for most people.

Hey, I have known this girl for about a year. She has always been nice to me. She has always complimented me and I have never been sure how to take it, she even asked to hug me a couple of times (I declined her because I didn't physical affection). I basically did what I needed to to be friends with her without coming across as a nice guy because I wasn't interested. I think it's safe to say that we both like each other. Although it feels like things have changed.

Then we had a debate about feminism. We do these a lot but she finally explained why she was one. I had an inkling that not all was well (although she is popular whereas im not), but the I got confirmation that she was scared about speaking out about something. In response, I told her my story and told her how I am overcoming my problems to make her feel better, and she told me that she was always there for me If I needed it and that she thought I had guts for doing it, but she treats me differently.

She is more open with me. She has told me she is lonely and she wants a boyfriend (she said the latter once and she has told me the former a couple times). She has told me about how she feels ugly and fat, even though she is clearly neither and she has told me other things that I won't say. This has both humanized her in my eyes and made me care about her, almost protective. I liked her before but now I actively want to be around her over other people.

I am very conservative with compliments, so I paid her a couple, and she responded to both with a kind of pleasant shock. Most of the time I am sarcastic with her though because I am with everybody else. However, she still ignores me in lessons a lot (probably because I mentioned that I like to concentrate during them) and I sometimes feel as if I am getting mixed messages. I notice that she is throwing me a lot of signals, but I haven't gone for it yet because I feel like she can do better socially.


What should I do
Thanks for reading

>>16780613

Horseshit. Confidence is a lie people tell themselves.

>>16780700
Then what's stopping people like >>16780608 lying to themselves?

>>16780721

Some people can't. It's kind of like nihilism. Most people don't choose to believe everything is meaningless--it just happens to them through observation and experience. One you realize that whether or not you're capable of something has nothing to do with how much you believe in yourself, you can't go back to believing in ideals like confidence.

>>16780668

thanks!

>>16780700
>>16780721
>>16780608

I think what it really comes down to, is that unless you're famous, no matter how attractive you are 99% of the time girls will not make the first move, and if they do it's usually a girl you're not attracted to.

So really, considering game imo is pretty much do anything aka say hi to show you're intererested, and then don't be completely autistic, that's why "confidence" matters.

>>16780750

let me say that's assuming she's already attracted to you, I don't think "saying the right thing" can make her attracted to you unless she finds out you're rich/famous etc

>>16780750
>and then don't be completely autistic
But that's exactly where I fail.

>>16780768

i don't know if this will help but seriously if she'll hangout with you she's at least interested, and as long as you're not into cp or something it probably won't destroy your chances.

>>16780792
>as long as you're not into cp or something
...this world is unfair.

So I met a girl in a night cub, we chatted, we danced and we spend most of the night making out.
I got her number...what now? I have never made this far I really don't know what to do.

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>>16780277
>>16780661

Is it wrong if I don't participate in my partner's fetishes? She likes pretty strange (to me) stuff, but I wouldn't feel comfortable at all during sex. I just feel like I have my own limits but I love her so it's very conflicting.

>>16780291
You have a chance.
It'll boost your confidence and you'll be more comfortable around better looking girls.

>>16780591
>>16780638
>>16780647
>>16780679
I never really got any advice for this. How do I talk to her? I know she'll probably just repeat what she said above.

>>16780696
I'd say go for it. I mean it's not like you have anything to lose as long as you ask her out to a date and not say let's go steady immediately. You should go on a date to see if a romantic relationship would work as well as your friendship has. Then you can make your own decision based off that.

>>16780804
Text her tonight and ask her if she'd be down to go on a date (not tonight but like whenever she's available) and that's really it.

>>16780891
Would you be willing to give any of them one chance?

Girls, guys, anyone

I'm really scared and upset right now. Like badly. A few hours ago I was on another board. In one of the threads I made a made a post, and on complete accident I uploaded something I didn't intend to upload. A screencap of a conversation I had with a girl that I like. And her name was in the fucking image. I deleted it right away. But people saved it and reuploaded it. they found her FB and were intimidating me that they will message her. I don't know if they did or didn't..

She's asleep right now, and I'm suppose to wake her up in a hour. What do I do? I know it's my fault, I should have been more careful. I thinking about just telling her when I wake her up that I had a terrible night. And when she asks why just say "someone hacked my phone and my Facebook. And they have been causing me problems for no reason and uploaded personal stuff on the Internet and messaged some of my friends bad things". I think that way, if she didn't her messages then she wouldn't be looking for them . And if she did, she would be able to link it to what I said.

I don't want to lie, but I would feel terrible explaining that I fucked up and was careless like that. Especially since if she didn't actually get any messages, then it would be unnecessary drama.

>>16781001
I've gotten used to one of them but her big one is choking and I just don't feel comfortable with that.

>>16780918
Talk to her honestly. Explain that you feel like she isn't interested or you aren't compatible or whatever.

You are in a relationship. You have to have the ability to communicate clearly if you want to survive.

I get why people are afraid to ask someone out. But once you are dating is it really just as difficult? Can't you feel like you can tell your feelings honestly to your partner once you are together?

>>16781006
Is it embarrassing that you saved it?

Because the mistake was honest. Just apologize, say you'll be more careful and it'll never happen again.

Then make sure you save all her-related shit in a very different area, and be ok with the fact that she'll never send nudes.

>>16781029

I don't want to say what really happened. Because IF she didn't get messages by the assholes, they she would be upset for my carelessness (which will NEVER happen again). And if she did get messages, she will be upset at both facts

Been seeing this girl, kind of. I randomly texted her "I like you!". She responded with "I know!"

She's not interested, huh?

>>16781040
I get that, but you asked what to do and lying in a relationship when YOU FUCKED UP is not a way to fix the fuck up.

If you care about her and she cares about you, don't fucking lie to her. Even saying nothing is better, and then come clean if she asks because she got messages.

>>16781047
Or she's Han Solo. Have you considered you could be balls deep inside girl Han Solo?

>>16781053

We are not exactly "in a relationship" we are just very very close, and flirt heavy.

I know I fucked up, I fucked up bad.

>>16781060

Lol

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>>16780205
/adv/ is full of people who believe in nonsense like assault weapons (read-scary rails). I really wouldn't stress it, I own arms myself and it's never been a big issue.

>>16780291
Bad idea friendo. You won't gain any of that confidence you're talking about if you're slagging a woman you consider disgusting. You get that when you're intimate with people you actually want to be intimate with.

I don't want to start another thread for this, so what do I say in therapy? I've had a handful of sessions, with another one scheduled in a few days, and I don't feel like any progress is being made.
My therapist just asks how I feel, to which I reply I feel like I want to die. Then she asks what that feels like, ad nausea. She summed up the last couple of sessions with "think about how you could do to stop thinking like that!". If I knew I wouldn't be in therapy.

>>16781151
Idk. Tell her you feel you haven't made any progress and these sessions don't seem to be helping anything.

With therapy you need to build a rapport with the therapist so it's difficult. It's part of the reason children therapists play board games with their clients.

>>16781047
She randomly sent me "you're super cute!" an hour later.

Does she like me or not? I'm confused as fuck. saying "I know" after I tell her I like her signals "Not interested".

Girls are jealous of my hair. Is that a bad thing?

>>16781220
pic

>>16781219
Dude, it means she's confident. She obviously likes you. If she didn't she wouldn't respond, or tell you to back off.

Ask her out and she'll fucking say yes.

>>16781220
No, it's attractive. Get in there.

>>16781219
did you text back "I know!"

Girls and guys:

What behaviors changed in you/your partner when you went from "going on dates" to "dating"?

Guys, how do you feel about girls with (naturally) super curvy figures? Think of Kim Kardashian or Nikki Minaj's bodies

>>16781272
Those examples are fine. The only reason most guys don't like "curvy" girls is because they're referring to the girls who call themselves curvy, but they're actually more on the level of Meghan Trainor.

>>16781277
I'm not worried about that connotation (I could stand to lose some flab but I'm not overweight or anything), I'm just curious what men think.

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>>16781226
>>16781230
here, have fun with it

>>16781316
It's long and luscious (though it could be sleeker). What's not to be jealous of?

>>16781047
Do this >>16781259 and then ask her out on a date.

>>16781220
No, I think a oogd thing. Unless your gf gets jealous of your hair.

>>16781267
More sitting around
Less sexual acts
More helping each other out
More problems

>>16781316

I recommend cream rinse.

>>16781370
I'll use it next time

>>16781316

You look like Chris Cornell fucked the dread pirate Roberts with a dildo forged in the fires of an Anthony Kiedis blackout. Just so you know.

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>talking to girl for awhile (accumulate 3000 texts over a 3 week period)
>i make my motives clear, ask if i can take her on a date
>"haha ok!"
>we keep talking
>suddenly she drops off the face of the earth and has yet to reply to one of my texts from 7 days ago

why do girls do this

>>16781487
>we keep talking
Whatever the reason, it has nothing to do with you asking her out.

Matched with a really cute girl on tinder.

She liked me at 12:30 AM, like forty minutes ago.

I messaged her, but no response. It's 1:12 AM here now, so she may have just gone to bed or doesn't want to talk to me yet.

I'm still new to Tinder, is this normal? Do girls sometimes match with a guy then not respond to him if it's too late at night?

This girl is really cute, I hope this works out.

>>16781627
>Matched with a really cute girl on tinder.
>I messaged her, but no response.
>This girl is really cute, I hope this works out

Yeaaaah.... Jumping the gun there a bit buddy. That's something you maybe say after like two dates, not after seeing two pictures

Girls, have you ever felt particularly attracted to/repelled by a certain dressing style? Or is it about the particular person wearing whatever suits them best according to their body's characteristics?

Lately, I've been getting the feeling that my rugged/boxer clothing is rather intimidating to most girls I've met, because I am a very big guy in general, and I've been strongly considering changing it for the sake of not coming off as scary as I sometimes do. For example, I vividly remember the face of this one woman I met; her body language and overall behavior made me realize that she probably thought I was gonna kidnap her and use her for ransom or something. The moment I saw her eyes, I understood that I should definitely stay away. This has happened several times to me, and the feeling is absolutely awful.

Perhaps it's something else that I've been doing?

Thanks to whoever decides to answer beforehand. Have a good one.

>>16781647

I'm not looking for a relationship, just a casual thing.

I was just wondering if it's normal for a girl to match with you late at night then not respond to your message till tomorrow. I'm assuming she must have gone to bed.

Girls how would you react when people call you and a male friend a couple.

>>16781683
I'd say "oh, we're just friends". How else am I supposed to react?

>>16781668
That's a perfectly reasonable assumption, and most likely true.
But if she never responds, don't take it hard. Tinder is literally a game to some people, they enjoy swiping faces in directions.

>>16781683
It means you are leading him on.
Let me guess, he likes you but youre just friends and would never date him.
You look like a couple because you are bleeding him dry like an emotional sponge.

>>16779595
no
>>16779725
people of all ages fuck around
>>16779756
no
>>16779887
i wouldn't marry him, but i'm not gay or a cuck
>>16780120
no, call a doctor and your parents
>>16780891
gradual steps. instead of starting out with a gimp suit, start with handcuffs.
>>16781151
communicate with your therapist, you won't solve your problems in a handful of meetings
>>16781267
it was less nerve-racking to be around her, you talk about stuff outside of "date talk" and scheduling dates, you invest more into their life than just putting food/dick into her
>>16781272
bad examples. "curvy" women are fine, women with a "curve" (singular) who call themselves curvy need to be sent to work camps
>>16781627
women use tinder to stroke their ego/milk male attention at a higher rate. there's a good chance she got your message and won't reply

>>16781272
You are probably fat. Both of those have had plastic surgery on their body.

>>16781689
>>16781725
What if i like him back? Im just shy and dont want him to reject me

>>16781736
No shit. That's why I said naturally

>>16780750
>and then don't be completely autistic

Autism will never be cured so we're forced to live with it.

And I'm fucking proud of it.

ladies, I have a penis.

Yes indeed, a very fine one as well, and I love my penis. It's size is absolutely perfect for my self pleasure moments and its capabilities as a penis work fabulously.

Should one be proud of his own Johnson?

>>16781727
>no, call a doctor and your parents

If I don't get a boner because of an attractive woman, I will fucking kill myself.

>>16781783
Sure. I'm proud of my tits, why shouldn't you be proud of your dick? It's just a shame you can't show it off in the same way I can show off my boobs

>>16781783
>>16781791
>being proud of things that you didn't work for or put any effort into
>literally things that just happened to you
That's like "being proud to be American!" or "being proud for having brown hair" or an extra nipple or whatever, why do people do this? Work towards a goal, work on yourself and achieve something, THAT you can be proud of. But not things that never were in your control.

>>16781810
I can tell you've got shit genetics and don't take care of yourself.

>>16781823
No and no, and even if it was the case you still don't have a reason to be proud of anything that just happened to you. If you find 20 bucks on the street do you also say to yourself "man I'm so proud of myself! I totally earned that!".

>>16781823
That person had a point and you just respond with ad-hominem and baseless accusations? Wow, talk about low.

>>16781810
I get your point, but you absolutely take pride in having a good body. It takes effort to maintain.

Ego is fragile and confidence can be difficult. If someone is secure in the knowledge that they have some strong attribute, whether it's the result of years of study or just keeping a good BMI, let 'em have it.

Your worldview isn't the only one, just because you can't understand others.

Say my dick is 3" and Ive been rejected for sex many times. Whens the best time to tell a girl Im interested in.
Say my dick is 8" and Ive been rejected for sex many times. Whens the best time to tell a girl Im interested in.
Say I have ED and cant get erect or I can never cum during sex, whens the best time to tell a girl.

>>16781897
>maintaining a good body
Takes effort and is therefore something you can take pride in, where did I ever say the opposite? But how large someone's breasts or dick happen to be is not. Neither is your hair or eye colour or where you were born or whether you're lactose (in)tolerant or gay/straight.

Girls and guys

Is there anything wrong with FwB? And what I mean by that is- is it ok for 2 friends, who care a lot about each other to have passionate sex together?

>>16781019
Girl who likes choking here. The guy I'm seeing isn't comfortable with it at all. I said I like it, we tried it and he said that he can't do it. It bums me out a little, but I'm not going to pressure him into doing something that he seems to find somewhat disturbing. He pleases me in plenty of other ways.

Girls:
Invited a girl out with me and a group of friends, said she couldn't because she already had plans, but ended up calling me and catching up with us after hers ended, that's good sign right?

>>16779593
For girls,

I like this girl at work but I barely talk to her enough to be her friend. We have had small talks but just simple convos. My question is, would be okay if I ask her if she would like to hang out with me anytime she is available? Is it wrong or what?

>>16782027
No, there is nothing intrinsically wrong with a purely physical relationship.

>>16782096

I should have said "is there anything wrong with 2 close friends, who enjoy just about everything about each other. Who talk all the time and just have lots of fun. Who do the FwB thing?

I'm just wonder on a emotional level. I have feelings for this girl, hard. She knows this, she has feelings for me. But she has some things going on in her life that makes her feel unready for a relationship. I'd love to date her, but she's not ready yet.

I am just curious how this will play out emotionally

>>16782106

*we have not had Sex yet. But we have been talking about it. And we flirt heavy

>>16782108
>>16782106
Still nothing wrong with it.

>>16782111

I'm just worried I'm going to be fucked emotionally. I'm already really attached. And having sex with this girl would literally like make my life. I can't even imagine how incredible that experience with her would be like. But, since we are not dating. I don't know what I would do if she ended up seeing someone else in the future since we arnt "together". But she told me she cares so much about me. So I don't know

Why do so many people think that guys and girls can't be friends without there being any ulterior motive? My best friend is a girl and while I think she's attractive, I have no sexual or romantic draw to her. Nor does she for me. It's something we've talked openly about before just to clear the air and we both agree that it's just not there. But we're really close, love doing stuff together and hang out all the time. People see us though and constantly ask when we'll 'get together' or quip about dating or other shit.

Why is it just such a hard thing for some people to deal with?

girls and boys. Ok this is weird

when I speak english, spanish or russian I'm suddenly behave as a very confident and funny person which lead me to have some foreign affairs let's say.
But when I speak my mother tongue with other natives I'm suddenly awkward, shy and sometimes bitter. Anyone else has the same problem? I think that once I read an article about it, it said that learning languages can lead to multiple personalities.

>>16782120
I suddenly*

>>16782096
This, but at the same time if you're already really close, caring friends and then you add sex into the mix...I mean, isn't it pretty much an 'actual' relationship in all but name?

Why would a girl suddenly cut contact with you?
Been talking to a girl for 3 weeks, out of the blue she stops answering my texts, stops going to the coffee shop she loved (we often hanged around there) and besides working, she stopped doing her own daily routine, no gym, nothing.
Last conversation ended on a really high point and she won't answer me at all, I don't know if someone told her something about me or she's just feeling really blue.

>>16782123
happened to me too, I can't really explain why this happens just say "fuck it" and go on with your stuff, eventually she will return

>>16781823
Great argument. He has a valid point, you should pride yourself on self improvement and learned skills, not what you're born with.

So if you lost a substantial amount of weight for instance, go ahead and be proud of that.

>>16782117
>Why do so many people think that guys and girls can't be friends without there being any ulterior motive?
Because sometimes its difficult to do so. It's completely possible, but it's easier to just be friends with a guy generally speaking if just because sexual tension is thrown out the window.

>>16782122

I guess, technically that's true..

Girls, is boob size a big deal to you? A girl friend is continuously making fun of guys' dick sizes, and indirectly accusing me too. Funny thing is, she's flat-chested. Would it be mean if I directed the banter that way?

>>16782190
Im a pretty flat girl and used to get made fun of in high school for it but i dont really give a fuck anymore

Id rather have a small size and they dont get in the way than have heavy, bouncing, backaching cowtits

Short girls with huge ones sometimes look stupidly out of proportion tbqh

Is confidence really important?
Do you know a guy who got laid only using confidence?

>girl with mental troubles, who grows distant at times because she's so stressed out
>very trusting and close with each other despite that

>girl who's got some physical (but invisible) issues and is withdrawn with daily(ish) doses of spaghetti and dropping text conversations
>gets very friendly once she starts talking about her (matching) interests, looks me up and doesn't shy from touching or talking lewd around me

I like both girls. Which sounds better?

>>16782256
Confidence is attractive for both sexes.

Girls: Which is worse, moobs or being skinnyfat?

Anyone- is it even worth keeping someone around whom who confessed to yet friend zoned you

>>16782308
Moobs. A hounded times. Biggest turn off.

>>16782379
>friend zoned you

Not if that's how you are framing the relationship, no.

Girls, do you like it if someone talks to you openly about their feelings, or is it better if its handled more like a game?

I recently met my ex, we had a good time, and i know shes ok with being friends. But i dont want to be just friends, its either a relationship, or nothing for me.
I dont want to waste my, nor her time.
I didnt wanted to rush things either, so after our recent meeting, i didnt say to her i want her back, just that i had a great time with her.
Is it ok, if i just say it to her next time we meet as it is, that i want to give this another chance, and ask her what she thinks about it?
Or is that a bad idea

To both: What bad habits can you deal with and what are instant red flags for you?

Nail biting and spitting are red flags for me, if they smoke, as long as they don't blow the smoke on my face I can deal with it, but getting drunk every weekend/alcoholism is a gigantic red flag for me, drinking socially/drinking without the intention of getting drunk I can completely deal with.

>>16782496
I don't want a guy who is messy, if we get serious then I'm going to be stuck cleaning up after him. Guys who can't cook are a bit of a turn off, it's such an important skill. Everyone should be able to at least cook simple foods. If he talks badly of his family members, especially his mother. An exception will be made if she's truly awful.

>>16782496
honestly, I'll get a lot of flak for this but casual sex is a big red flag. It goes against my ideals (not to say everybody should be pure virgins, but I really think sex should be for people in relationships).

Another is how people treat strangers/property/things they don't own/etc. It makes me mad when people do shitty things and then follow it up with "it's not my problem."

so basically immaturity and people who strive for instant gratification. I'm okay with pretty much everything else.

>>16780061
You're prude as fuck for calling that shit bad.

>>16782506
>I'll get a lot of flak for this but casual sex is a big red flag

Actually it's not, well not for me at least.

Since casual sex is "Casual" and not intentionally personal and loving and entirely intimate, the point of casual sex is the joy of it entirely, but sex feels much better if you do with a person you love and who loves you back, monogamous or not.

If its intentionally intimate, you don't have to worry about falling in love, because its one of the best parts of sex, having that ecstatic moment with your loved one in absolute bliss as your chemicals go wild in your brain and body, your hormones practically radiating in the room as you both sweat and release your bodily fluids, THIS is truly the best way to enjoy sex in its absolute prime, and the more aroused you are, the more fluids you release.

Got very erect writing all that.

>>16782496
> Smoking weed more than once a week
> Doing drugs
> Drinking with the intention of getting drunk
> Eating junk food all the time/being extremely picky eaters
> Not being able to take care of themselves and their stuff

> Treating strangers badly
> Talking shit about their friends
> Seeking attention/approval ("Do I look fat?", "I'm so ugly!" kind of stuff)
> Casual sex

>>16782496
>bad habits
Nail biting, being slightly messy, excessive swearing, occasional weed use.
>red flags
Self harm, hoarding, excessive arrogance or shit-talking, being an alcoholic or stoner.

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>I'm trying to figure out how to be you

What does she mean?

>>16782520
>the point of casual sex is the joy of it entirely

this is why I don't agree with it, we shouldn't live our lives filling the holes in our life with whatever releases the dopamine in our brain. your preceding paragraph is precisely the reason why I believe it should be savoured for someone you truly care for and for someone who cares back.

don't get me wrong - i don't treat anyone differently based on their sexual activities - to each their own. For me personally, I don't want to be with someone who takes something I consider very intimate and personal and does it when they want with whomever they want.

>>16782541
>hoarding

Does that include every Joozian member in the universe?

>>16782600
So long as you're not hoarding trash.

>>16782609
I have more than 100 video games, does this count as hoarding.

No I'm not getting rid of them.

And no I'm not going to lend or give any.

And no, you will absolutely never touch them, I might play them later.

I swear if you even sneeze at them I will go fucking postal.

I'm a hoarder aren't I?

Females: Breast envy = Real?

>>16782687
It's only the small titties that get in a tiff when they're tired of the ugly pedophile attention. Otherwise you're like "I feel bad for your body/wallet because you carry duffle bags compaired to my mellons, even more so if you haven't had a kid"

Femanons: is anything a greater turn on for you than a guy who's skilled in the arts and crafts of woodwork?

>>16782735
A smart guy. A well-spoken guy. A charming, polite guy.

How do i stop being so picky when it comes to how women look?
It started when i was 17 but i thought it was gonna pass, but now i'm 23 and even if i'm a solid 5/10, the only girls i want to bang are +8/10.
And no i don't masturbate a lot, and when i do i don't watch porn.

>>16779887
>He can't possibly really love me, right? Not in a mature, marriage potential kind of way?

No man has ever loved a woman in this way. You believed in fairy tales. This anon hit it >>16779903 #

>>16782758
Stop believing in fairy tales, goes the same for ugly women too.

I have feelings for a friend of mine, and I think she might be interested but need some help to figure out if it's not wishful thinking on my part.

Not only that, is there a way to go about this and minimize the risk of losing her as a friend if she's not interested? I realize that risk is always there with this sort of thing, but I don't want to make it worse than it needs to be.

>>16781901
>first two
No need to mention

>third one
When it's progressed to the point where it's obvious you're seconds away from having sex. I hope you're getting medical treatment.

Possible to get into a relationship with zero flirting?

Is it possible to get rejected if a person has never been in a relationship?

Or would this act be considered completely asseholic and immoral and/or unethical?

So I have a weird situation I need some advice about.
I moved into a house with three girls at the beginning of my second University year. I didn't really know them but I started hanging out with one girl in particular. This was to the extent where she talked to her friends about me and mutual friends said we got along incredibly well. Long story short I find out she has a boyfriend and leave any ideas of a crush behind. As time goes on we get closer and eventually start going swing dancing together. Her boyfriend didn't want to go and got bummed about it. She starts to tell me how much she hates him etc.
Eventually I come to the conclusion I really do like her a lot (not because I'm just attracted to her but I feel emotionally close to her, I'm sure it's not simply lust). Our mutual friend tells me I should admit how I feel about her. Long story short I do this after a very positive dance session. She tells me she would be with me if she wasn't in a relationship. I'm bummed but I get it.
A week goes by, last Tuesday to be specific. She dumps her boyfriend. We continue speaking like we normally do. On Friday we go out drinking, she gets drunk I get drunk. I tell her how I feel while we walk home. She doesn't really say too much. Then she kissed me. We talk a bit more and then she kisses me more passionately. I don't want to take advantage of her this way, it would hurt me so I don't do anything. Another housemate, her friend (a girl and former lover) pulls me aside and tells me to back off because she "doesn't need a relationship". I think this is bullshit as she tells me I'd be great for any girl, but not her friend apparently. I just go to bed. I had to leave over Saturday and Sunday. I saw her this morning, Monday, and she smiled and said hey. My question is how do I go about what I do next? I'm overthinking this a lot and I don't want the stress anymore. I'm pretty sure she likes me, but I've never entered a relationship and have no idea how to approach her.

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Girls, guys

Girlfriend wants to cut her hair like this. I really dislike the way it looks, but she really wants to do it. Obviously, it's her hair so she can do what she wants. I really like her a lot! She's so amazing, and cute. Just, I really, really dislike this haircut.

How do I cope with this?

>>16783113
Convince her the haircut needs too much styling to be convenient to her life

>>16783127

How do I do that.

>>16783130
Well what kind of lifestyle does she live?

I need some advice from femanons:

>work in an office complex
>a girl on the floor above mine enters my office two or three times a day to print shit out or make coffee
>one day she asks me a question about stationary and I really notice her for the first time
>develop a crush on her
>she asks two more questions since then about office stuff while I'm seated and the place is too quiet and busy to do anything but answer her formally
>I guess I have a self-loathing personality or something since I just pretend to not notice her when she's around
>feelings towards her intensify
>haven't seen her for past two weeks

Would it be autistic or "creepy" of me to ask her colleague in passing, who is the same age as her and who eats lunch with her, whether "her colleague" (I know her name but don't want to seem like a stalker) has left?

I'm hoping she'll say no so I can finally look forward to at least approaching her and testing her reaction. Though if she has left I'm hoping (perhaps naively) that her colleague will tell the girl I like that I asked about her, or she might say yes she has left, why? And I'll say say something that subtly communicate my attraction towards her.

Thank you.

>>16783113

It's totally reasonable to tell her that you'd break up with her if she cuts her hair like that. If she cares more about her hair than you, then you wouldn't want to be dating her anyway.

>>16781661
bump

>>16783136

she likes to go on adventures

>>16783157

Is it really? I figured that would be the wrong answer..

>>16781661
I'm particularly attracted to the business casual (collared shirt, slacks, belt, leather shoes, sweater or jacket, watch, etc.) and handsome farmhand (plain fitted heather tee, jeans, boots, flannel) looks. Obviously it depends on the setting and circumstances. I'm repelled by guys over college age who dress like they're still not.

>>16783185
Sweet. Thanks for answering.

Do you have a take on the overall situation I am currently in though? Anything would be helpful, really.

>>16783157
>>16783172
>It's totally reasonable to tell her that you'd break up with her if she cuts her hair like that.
It really isn't, it's a pretty stupid reason to break up. It's just hair. She'll realise how much maintenance it is soon enough and grow it out.

>>16783228
Try a suit. Even a cheap one. Most people don't know the difference anyway as long as it fits decently.

>>16780696
Bump

>>16783265
Part of what you pay for in a more expensive suit it the fitting and tailoring they do for you to, you know, make sure it fits properly. Very few suits will completely be ready to wear off the rack.

>>16783261

Thanks. It seemed a little harsh to end the feelings I have for her over hair, even though I think it's unattractive

im 23, do women like dating younger men?
Never really even thought of meeting anyone older before.

>>16783113
>I really, really dislike this haircut

Because...?

>date comes to my place for dinner
>she doesn't drive, she lives about 15min walk away
>begins to rain pretty bad

Is it creepy or gentlemanly of me to offer her to spend the night? I don't want to give her the idea I want to sleep with her on our second date, it takes me a bit to open up to that.

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I have a single camera in my apartment. It faces the front door. I don't have cameras in any other room, and turning off the lone camera is easy to do (it's not 24/7).

Would you be uncomfortable coming into my apartment even if I said it's off? I can even prove it's off; hell, I can unscrew it from the ceiling if you'd like. I was burgled once before and it's a precaution (I save like 60$/mo insurance for having it).

>>16783362

It looks bad

>>16783393
You should be offering her a lift home or walking her home with an umbrella. That's gentlemanly

Girls,

what do you mean when you were supposed to be on a date with a guy but cancel and postpone it because "you're not feeling very well" ?

So i was supposed to go on a date with that girl and she told me she wasn't feeling too well and would rather see me next week instead. I know it's not bullshit because she already did this and i actually saw her the next week, so i don't think it's an excuse

So yeah you might say that it's just because she really isn't feeling well but it's a rather common message i got from different other girls and i was wondering if there was some meaning behind it when you girls say that

>>16783409
>bad

I literally see 0% problems with it.

Trauma or drama?

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Girls, would you be ok with skinny guys, not as in meth head skinny, but just that you could simply see skinny arms which is a great punch to my self esteem.
Thanks

I feel like absolute shit..

My FwB, who is a very close friend of mine. Who is now living far away Said that this week we should each have sex with a different person. I don't know if this was a joke, or if she's serious. But it fucking hurt to hear that. I literally don't even know what to say. We both care deeply about each other. No, we are not "officially" in a relationship although it sure has felt like one. and then she says this. She said if we both see someone else. It will be even.

Fuck..

>>16783440
Post pics of arms.

>>16783265
Thanks for the advice. I definitely give it a go.

Cheers.

>>16783459
here's a pic: http://imgur.com/c48qmuS
For some reason, my computer can't upload shit

>>16783445
I mean, what did you expect? Did you not understand that friends with benefits aren't the same thing as a couple? I don't understand.

For guys or girls: If you started going out with someone and then found out they lived with a friend of the opposite sex as roommates, would that be weird for you?

>>16783484
Looks fine to me dude.

>>16783499

I hate my life so fucking much.

Yes I know it's not the same things. But I've had feelings for the girl for a while, and we just recently started being intimate. It's not just sex, we are passionate toward each other. We do lots of things together and constantly talk. she likes me a lot, I know that. Just she said she has too much going on in her mind to have a relationship. There is some things she wants to focus on first which I understand.

It just really hurts to hear that the girl you care for tells you to go have sex with someone else so we can stay even until we meet again

>>16783512
Idk, guys around me actually have meat on their arms, sometimes my family members call me skin and bones, i tell myself its ok, but inside i don't know if it really is.

>>16783517
Is she the first person you've felt that way around?

>>16783531

Yes

>>16783517
I dont know what to tell you other than you already fucked up by doing the whole FwB thing if it wasn't something you could handle.

Hope you can sort your stuff out anon.

>>16783561

I feel like a small wreck right now. I wish we would date. I understand she has things going on in her life that makes her not feel ready for a serious relationship. I respect that. and I know she has feelings for me, as she knows I have feelings for her as well. it's just so hard to hear this shit

>>16783560
Let her go, man.

>>16783577

How do I do that. She's a friend, and she's special to me. She would be really hurt if I cut contact with her.

>>16783570
Well, honestly, even if you were in an 'official' relationship, do you think things would be that different? Long distance relationships are really difficult to pull off. People have needs, you know? It's likely even if you were dating this situation would come up. I know that's probably not what you want to hear right now but you need to realize that sometimes shit just isn't meant to work out.

Finding the right person at the wrong time sucks. I know.

>>16783592

I hear you..

>>16783588
She wouldn't, you would.

>>16783588
Oh, no. I wasn't talking about cutting contact with her. I didn't mean that. I meant let go emotionally. Sure, love her as a friend or whatever, but do realize that you need to find another girl.

I went through this with my childhood sweetheart. We were inseparable from kindergarten (Age 5) until I had to leave my country (age 15). She was my first girlfriend and the single best friend I had ever had until then. I moved out with my family. I tried keeping contact with her. We talked for while. We dreamed of coming back together and living in nice places. It was all good and dandy. Eventually, we started growing up, and even though we were still good friends, distance took its toll. Each with our own lives, we started talking less and less. First, it was a day without hearing each other. Then a week. Then a two months. Then a year. Then it just stopped, and I've never seen her again since.

Take it from your dear Internet friend: the earlier you learn to "let go", the better off you'll be. You don't want to prolong the inevitable; it's simply not good for you.

>>16783609

But she would. Regardless what you think, she does like me. She holds a lot of trust in me, and I know she cares. She sends me sweet notes often. She even draws me cute pictures and send them to me when I'm sleeping so I'll see them when I wake up. She does it all on her own and puts a lot of thought into it. Why would she not care if we cut contact??

>>16783628
Because shes getting railed next weekend.

>>16783627

The thing is before I met her, I wasn't looking for a girlfriend. I haven't cared at all. Then I met her, we became friends and grew close. Then feelings developed. So I literally don't want another girl. even when this is completely over, I won't want another girl

>>16783637

Fuck off

>>16783649
???

That's literally what is going to happen. It might be happening right as we speak.

>>16783627
>I wasn't talking about cutting contact with her. I didn't mean that. I meant let go emotionally.

Do this. Turn off any ideas of romantic love and just value her as a good friend. Nothing wrong in life with having good friends. I had to do something similar recently when we both realized it just wasn't going to work anymore long distance. It was destroying our relationship to try and stay a couple so we decided to cut our losses and be friends only. It's worked out well...a lot of tension is gone, we can talk a lot more openly again and the looming feeling of distance destroying our relationship is gone.

It's hard. I know. It was a conversation that took us nearly a month to finish. But it was well worth it. Cut your losses and keep your friend or try to stick to your emotions and lose her, that's how I see it.

I've actually been talking a close friend of mine through a similar situation recently too...like, almost immediately in the wake of my own debacle. It's been sort of surreal how mirrored the situation is and seeing her go through it has given me a lot of perspective on my own decisions.

It's also drawn us really really close and opened up some odd feelings between us that I can't quite pin down yet but that's another story entirely.

Anyways, in her case she has this mentality that she knows she shouldn't put her life on hold for a distant 'maybe they'll come back' but at the same time she's not willing to completely close that door and wants to be ready if they do come back in the future. I don't think that's healthy personally because I think that screws up any other shot at a relationship you make in the meantime...but that's just my opinion.

>>16783645
Well, all right. Tell her that. Tell her how you feel. What you want. Tell her every single detail. If she's not convinced by that, then you should start considering what people here have been suggesting.

I am seeing this girl on Saturday that stopped talking to me 7 months ago because she didn't want to date. I don't really know what to do. Should I just pretend nothing happen? Should I try again?

>>16783655
>>16783659

How do I turn off feelings for her?

other girls are not a option because I don't have any care to talk to other girls.

>>16782562
Put the lotion in the fucking basket

>>16783627
Im a different anon but a similar situation, I'll make it brief:

used to date a grill for a Lil bit, fucked a few times. Split up cuz were too different but still friends, meet up and speak often.
Recently she got a new bf, and is preggo after being with him for a few months.

Im hurt about it desu, but its not that I want her to be my wifey. I've just got a feeling of owww in my soul that I could have had a happy life with her.

I cant seem to get rid of her emotionally.
Its not good for me and is causing me some inner suffering, how do I get over this feeling?

>>16783701

I'm the OP to this topic we are discussing. I feel terrible for you anon, that sounds awful.. :(

>>16783701
I am seeing this girl on Saturday that stopped talking to me 7 months ago because she didn't want to date. I don't really know what to do. Should I just pretend nothing happen? Should I try again play it cool?

>>16783676
You do
>>16783659
That.

Tell her how you feel. Once you clear the air, you'll feel better. Well, no, that's not true. You'll feel pretty shitty when you find out she doesn't feel as strongly. But then you can start the process of getting over her.

Best case scenario, as unlikely as it is, she feels the same, you guys don't fuck around, you keep up a long distance relationship, you get back together and live happily ever after.

Worst case scenario is you find out you're wasting your time having strong feelings for someone who doesn't return them and you can begin the healing process.

It ain't going to be easy, but it's what you should do. It's not just the right thing for you, but it's only fair to her that if you feel that strongly she get to know about it.

>>16783701
>its not that I want her to be my wifey. I've just got a feeling of owww in my soul that I could have had a happy life with her.

Man that hits close to home.

>>16783676
>>16783701
Don't try to make sense of it and realize that some things just happen. You can either continue suffering while being completely unable to change what's happening, or you can find out that there is still happiness for you to be found out there. Nobody can teach you exactly how to do it. There is no manual. You just kind of do.

>girl is in a bad mood because shit happened
>say some supportive things and do her a favor over text
>she just says "yeah" a few times and doesn't respond to the favor she did ask for a while back
>not even a "thanks" for days and counting
I know she's a bit of a special case here, but it pisses me off that I go through trouble for her and she won't even so much as acknowledge it.

Is my being pissed off justified? What should I do? How do I not let this get to me that much? Getting busy doesn't work because I keep getting distracted

>>16783708
Its pretty painful atm, I been depressed last week (was on a cocaine bender last weekend though) I cant really explain the feelings but I know its not good.
Its not the first time a woman has caused me pain, but this feeling, well I want rid of.

I suppose its oneitis, but im not even in a situation where I can go fuck 1 girl let alone 10 to get over it.

What hurts too is I keep getting thoughts of "he leaves her knocked up" like a bitter thought of she should have been with me. Its not a good state of mind

>>16783723
Stop orbiting and she might respect your efforts.

>>16783709
Explain a bit more anon im not really understanding you.
Why have you not seen her for 7 months,

So last friday I asked here about advice how I could come clean to my wife about a past porn addiction and desire to explore more of both our sexuality since she is so vanilla and dare I say, lame in our pretty much dead bedroom situation.

We had the talk, it went a bit better than expected, she was glad that "this was my secret" and used porn as a way to deal with her low libido, instead of cheating on her with other women. Ok, I guess.

Anyway, she was pretty cool with it, even though it was a PAST addiction, as in, I found a way to deal with it and I don't watch porn anymore.. I Just had to come clean to her about it because this is the root of my new kinky and sexual desires.

What she said next was a bit surprising, she told me to hook up a TV in the bedroom and download some porn so we can watch it together. Ok, unexpected twist. Problem is, she obviously doesn't want to watch the kind of nasty shit I've been looking at in the past, she wants female friendly porn. Now, I can find porn paswords to every popular site in the world. I can download every porno known to man without paying for it... But I can't name one movie title or studio that makes "female friendly" porn. Someone, please help me out!

Women of /adv/, please tell me you can help me.

On a side note, isn't it rather dangerous suggestion of hers? Won't I relapse into my old nasty habbits, that I DO NOT WANT (I literally woke up at 4 am to watch porn, I don't want to get back to that.)

Girls:

If you're on a first date with a guy, and the date itself ends up being shitty, through little to no fault of the guy, how likely are you to give him a second chance?

I'm talking about things like:
>being late due to an emergency
>taking you to dinner at a really bad restaurant
>taking you out to karaoke and he turns out to be a really bad singer
>taking you out to the movies and he chooses a movie that doesn't suit your tastes
>takes you to a place that's really boring (like a museum of a subject that doesn't interest you)

>>16783723

I just dealt with that same thing the other week. Just act normal and continue where you left off

Do most girls these days prefer masculine or feminine guys? Asking this as a fairly feminine man who prefers tomboys.

>>16783734
We were best friends for 2 years.
Did everything together. Video games. Reading, cooking because she suckd at it. She spent the night a couple of times at my apt. We stop talking for 7 months because she didn't want to go on a date with me. We got into a fight and she said there's no point in being friends since that's all she wanted and I wanted more.
I don't feel entitled to date her but I feel bad cause all the guys she dated only wanted her for her body. Anyway I don't know what to say or do when I see her.

>>16783740
Look up any porn with one male and one female in it. It's clear that your wife is pretty vanilla with this shit, so you gotta start out small.

Then ease her into porn with one male and multiple females.

Interracial porn is okay, but require more thought. If you're both white, avoid showing her anything with a black man in it, otherwise she might get ideas. If you're an interracial couple, and let's say that you're white and she's Asian, don't show her any porn with Asian females in it, otherwise she'll get the wrong impression of your view on race.

Going back to my original point, try to stick to one male one female porn for now, and pick a few videos with some interesting positions. I'm assuming your wife does missionary only. Well, even doggy style and (reverse) cowgirl might be new to her.

>>16783740
Im not a femanon but porn is a normal part of modern life, watching it is nothing to be ashamed of.
If you want fem friendly porn Google it. I cant even get hard to fem porn because its all centered on the man and "sensual" love making.
Us men, well you know, we wanna see a cum slut or slam pig getting punished.

Just tell her sometimes you need some me time to spank your monkey to sick shit.
I suppose its quite healrhy rather than having repressed sexual desires.

If you love eachother she should understand

>>16783760
So find a tomboy who likes femmy guys.

>>16783763
>We got into a fight and she said there's no point in being friends since that's all she wanted and I wanted more.

I can see her side of things. People complain about the friendzone a lot but honestly sometimes you just happen to find a good friend who's also attractive. Doesn't mean it should go any further necessarily. I think that's why I don't tell my best friend about my crush on her, I'm afraid it would just push her away since it's been made pretty clear to me in the past she's no interested in anything beyond friendship. Kind of hurts...but she IS seriously my best friend and I'd rather suck it up and deal with it than risk pushing her away.

>>16783763
Not speaking to you for 7 months is pretty harsh. She couldn't have valued your friendship that much.

I would suggest to meet her, but be non chalant about it. Have an air of you are doing perfect without her. Don't get into deep conversations or mention you still like her like that, you never know she might give you some signs that shes thinking of you in that was.

Its the classic battle of the sexes and the one who desires the other more is the looser.

>>16783731
Not putting in any effort to orbit whatsoever. The only reason I approached her this time was to ask her how something went and keep to my word that I'd help her with that favor. Didn't bother chasing her in the days after, and not planning to either.

>>16783742
I'll do that. Making a big deal out of it isn't going to help anything.

>>16783645
Hey man, I know how you feel. I had a crush like that in highschool.

Now I'm a 30 year old virgin, trying to figure out how dating works because I don't want to be alone forever.

You will meet other people you are interested in. You will. Just give it time.

>>16783784
So when I see her, just pretend I've been doing awesome without her? Maybe you're right. The friendship could of been one sided and she just wanted the attention she wasn't getting from the guys she was dating but I don't like thinking negatively

>>16783741
>being late
That would make me think twice about a second date, no matter the reason. It won't completely write you off, but if it becomes a habit then you're out.

>bad restaurant, bad singer, boring museum
Whatever, in fact, the whole thing might be a memorable and fun story to be retold for years to come. Which is way better than a decent date you forget about 6 months later.

>he chooses a movie that doesn't suit your tastes
I would hope we'd pick a movie together. If I loathe horror and he chooses a horror movie without even consulting me on my 'tastes' I would be very annoyed.

>>16783789

Yeah I was doing what you were at first and getting the short answers. I figured I'd something is bother her, it's better to focus her mind on something else.

>>16783791
Feel your pain anon im also 30 nearly 31 not a virgin but havent had sex or a date for 2 years, im getting the feeling im gonna be on my own forever.

Irony for me is im far from socially inept or bad with women, im just broke, no job or prospects and have psoriasis that kills my self confidence

>>16783798
>I would hope we'd pick a movie together.
Why can't I meet more women like you? Every woman I've dated and talked to always wanted the guy to do all the choosing.

>>16783791
>You will meet other people you are interested in. You will. Just give it time

I doubt that. I'm 25, and im never around girls. At work it's work, so the few few attractive females are married and make way much more money then me. Outside of work I never see girls. So I know that won't be happening. The only way I met my friend is because I was proactive and made a online account. But I'll never do that again

>>16783796
>just pretend I've been doing awesome without her?
Yeah exactly that, not arrogant just everything has been ok and asking her out was a small thing, not something that bothered you. Even if it did just dont let her know.

I know from experience, because I was a Mr good guy to, for less of a better word a huge slut, when I was a teenager.
I later realized that more often than not being "nice" to a grill you like doesn't get you her. They often go for men who want them purely for sex and treat them like things rather than people.

>>16783777
I don't think the friend zone exist.
I think I just missed my chance to date her. Idk I just don't know what to do when I see her. We did everything together and spend days calling and talking over the phone. It's just weird to see all this time past and this is where we are

>>16783811
Or the old "dont mind" or "whatever" when actually they do mind...
Misrepresentation

>>16783830
What if her other friend knows I was shitty and probably told her?
Idk I'll do that! We're going to see deadpool so it won't be much talking

>>16783819
Apart from online dating, there are plenty of opportunities to meet grills, pubs/bars are never a good place for a good relationship but sex..yea
Then there arelocal shops, coffee places, meditation classes, many places.
Best way to meet a grill is through friends, or even better friends gf's friends

>>16783852

What I'm saying is I won't meet girls unless I am proactive about it. To meet girls I would have to go out of my way, Which I'm
Not doing anymore. This is too painful, and I never want to experience this again.

>>16780181
Never actively look for a gf is terrible advice. This is exactly how you end up with no gf.

Guys, how do I approach my friend for pity sex... I tired of not ever having any sex because I am ugly and I am hoping my best friend will be willing to put it in me.

>>16783924

Why not just hang out with him one night, get some drinks at Home. And just say "God I really need sex..." Gauge his reaction and be upfront and say you want to bang. But leave out the "pity sex" part

>>16783924
Please don't. Start working on improving your body image.

>>16783950
As a heterosexual male with female friends, that is unlikely to work.

I generally don't have sex with women of low integrity. I'm not gonna fuck someone I'm not in a relationship with just because she "really needs sex."

>>16783840
Bump

>>16783924
Assuming you are a femanon not a gay guy. Its never too hard for a femanon to get laid, just going to a bar for a few drinks would get you a guy.
As for the friend, just blatantly ask, would you give me some cock.
Or as other anon said get drunk together and it would naturally happen.

>>16784018
This worked, he's coming over right now, thanks

>>16784057

Don't make out with him. It might make it awkward. Just fuck

>>16779632
Cheated on a girl

>>16779706
Not really if you're a hot old daddy but I like older guys

Ladies. Why do some of you try to manipulate you in order to get self-esteem I guess? like you're there, then you back away again again until one of us backs off, or until the guy confronts you and you close shut the door to that sweet va-jay-jay?

>>16779756
I'm currently lying about my age (pretending to be two years older) and I feel horrible about it. I'll tell him the truth soon.

>>16780549
Depends on your age but yes

>>16783433
bump

>>16782123
I've done that before and it was because of depression and self loathing

>>16782308
Moooooobs

>>16782735
A tall dominant guy who likes me calling him daddy

I feel pretty bad, theres a guy eho I suspect has a crush on me.. And this past Friday I asked "what are you doing this weekend" he responded "Nothing really you?"... I mentioned I had a friends party I was going to... He then said "oh" disappointed...

I think he was expecting me to ask him out, he wasn't at school today. What do you guys think? What should I do??

>>16782190
It would probably upset her, but she wont admit it.