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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

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Thread replies: 319
Thread images: 20

Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.

Avoid asking these common questions:

>Is it normal for me to go to a club/bar by myself?
Yes. Stop overthinking this.

>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it.

>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.

>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
Most likely

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.

>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.

>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing

>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.

>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>

>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking

>Brandon or Female Brandon
Piss off.

>Frog
Also piss off.
>>
Do girls always recycle nudes when they send them to guys
>>
>>16557746
I don't take nudes, but if I did, then of course I would.
>>
>>16557746
I'd only ever send them to my life partner, and I'd delete them afterwards to know which I've already sent him. So no.
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>>16557746
Yes.
>>
HELP

I HAD A FIRST DATE PLANNED

BUT IT TURNS OUT WHAT I WANTED TO DO ISN'T AVAILABLE FOR ANOTHER WEEK

WHAT DO I DO INSTEAD
>>
>>16557775
SHOTS
>>
It seems like girls like watching guys talk with passion about something. Why is that?
>>
That nudes question kind of makes me wonder...

To both genders who do online dating...

Have you ever used or would you ever use pictures from a past relationship in your profile?
>>
>>16557778
We are both very conservative

If there is an easy answer
that ain't it
>>
>>16557780
Because people get into a kind of flow when they talk about something they're passionate about, and it's just... nice. This isn't a gendered thing either
>>
>>16557775
There's so much Christmas stuff going on, you can probably find some sort of Christmas parade and get her lunch or dinner. Id be super happy with that. Local rocky horror picture showings are always fun.
Art museum and local theatre events.
>>
>>16557780
I'm not expert, but I like a hard working/ambitious guy because it feels like you're going to be taken care of. When someone talks about their passion that gives of the opposite of lazy vibes, it gives off 'I'm gonna do something or I wanna do something' vibes.

And seeing people get excited is just super platonically cute with both genders!
>>
>>16557784
No way.

-female
>>
>>16557780

I'm a dude... but I'm pretty sure this is a general people thing...

In fact I think every girl I've ever been seriously attracted to, the defining moment of interest was always one where they're intensely passionate about something.
>>
Reposting since I'm still on the fence and unsure if I'm just being thin skinned.

>Knew girl, seemed nice, but out of nowhere started avoiding me and any dates. I figure she meets someone new or god knows what.
>I move on, she then asks mutual friends about me and reappears. Acts very rude however. This just makes me push her away since I don't want any of that.
>She is however, a friend of my mothers. She's been invited to our family Christmas party, something like 15 people there tops.
>I told another friend about this, she has suggested she tags along as a fake date to try to make her jealous and make fun of the tension.

I feel like this is just a severe source of drama regardless of if I invite her or not, and I'm tempted to just order chinese and stay at home instead. I'm curious what others would do in my position.
>>
>>16557880
Your friend sounds immature and like she's trying to create unnecessary drama. Grow up, go along (alone) and act civil.
>>
Guys: i've got chicken skin on my thighs, my upper arms and a bit on my bottom. I am very insecure about my skin. I try everything i can to make it smoother. It keeps me from relaxing when cuddling/ having sex. I always think about how disgusting my skin must feel instead of enjoying myselfe and stop worrying. How much would you really care? Am i blowing this way out of proportion?
>>
>>16557912
Generally yes, its mostly in your head. People tend to blow up traits that no one else would notice.
>>
How do I message this girl without coming off as creepy or desperate? We haven't really spoke in person but I like her, I just have no idea what to say to her
>>
>>16557945
What context? Facwbook, tinder, text? How do you know her? Why don't you speak in person?
>>
>>16557956
Facebook, I know her from school, we kinda have mutual friends, I can't talk to her in person as the school year has finished
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Guy here. If I'm one to two inches smaller down there than the guy my gf was previously with, will it bother her and for how long? I don't actually know how big he is I'm just wondering for a what if scenario.
>>
>>16557990
Refer to OP:
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
Most likely

>>16557985
I suppose just send her a message that says something like, "Hey, whatserface! I was in your whatever class. We never really got the chance to talk so I just wanted to say hi. How's your winter break going?"
>>
So my friend is setting me up with his friend who mentioned that she had matched with me on tinder. I had messaged her but never got a response. He gave me her number and said she had said she was into me. What's the next move? How do I even go about texting this girl
>>
Girl here. Asking guys, girls can answer too.

Is 3-5 sexual partners too much for a 19 year old male? Not including one night stands.
>>
>>16557880
Just tell her that. She'll understand.
>>16557880
Don't try to make her jealous. It's just petty. I can't really understand what was going on before but this will only be adding on to drama, like you said.
>>16557990
All depends if you can use it well anon. Her previous could have been shit/ok in bed for all you know.
If you bother to focus on oral with her (and she does the same) and care about making her cum everytime you fuck (regardless if you have came) then I don't see why there should be a problem.
>>16558070
Just mention that your friend set you up, say he said you were interested and tell her to get back to you if she is.
>>16558079
Girl respoding (if you care).
I suppose it could be for 19.
Perhaps he has only been in 1-2 month relationships.
>>
>>16558070
Say hi, introduce yourself, and ask her out to coffee/drinks/meal
>>
>>16558079
I wouldn't think so at all. But i don't really care how many partners he'd have. Why does it matter to you what we think on that? Shouldn't you decide for yourself if you're comfortable with that?
>>
>>16558079
To me, yes.
>>
Girls, is being overly affectionate a turnoff to you?

My girl can be a bit of a downer sometimes. Shit happens to her a lot. I regularly try to cheer her up with sweet words and endearing teasing, but on multiple occasions she's talked right over it or she downright ignores it over text. I like showing my feelings for her like that, but with every time she doesn't acknowledge it, my self-respect goes down the gutter some more. Is it wrong what I'm doing? Does it sound like I'm suffocating her?
>>
>>16558197
This sounds like me and my bf before when I was in a down slump. I appreciated everything he said but I never showed it in my responses as I was too moody to show it.
>>
Girls: what would snap you out of some moody panicky thinking and get you back on track?
>>
>>16558217
Chocolate
>>
I like a girl who's very scatterbrained and very busy. Before she got busy, we went out a few times and we both seemed very interested in each other. We became close friends, and after she got busy we haven't gone out since but remained close friends. We regularly hang around together with friends during breaks and I regularly text her, but that's all.

However, with a ton of things on her mind, she changed. Her work gained priority, and I lost very much of it. Even when I'm alone with her I feel like I can't reach out to her anymore. She's just so distant and uninterested nowadays.
I asked her about it. If I was a bother to her and if she wanted me to step back and leave her alone. She told me it's because she's busy, tired, and didn't know what to reply to me most of the time. No word about that she was bothered by me though. However, she still acts normal around others.

I don't know what to do. The textbook thing to do is take the hints and move on. Thing is, this is a girl who regularly used to praise herself for her bluntness and honesty, and her mind is all over the place. I gave her the chance to tell me to piss off, and she didn't. I know she's busy, but I can't think of anything to talk about anymore, and her lack of respect towards me is hurting my self esteem.

Should I just sit it out? Assume they were hints after all and move on? It feels like I'm becoming an orbiter, and I've had enough of that already for a lifetime.

And I suppose one appropriate for the thread: girls, if a guy was bothering you and he asked you if you think he is, would you tell him honestly?
>>
>>16558206
I hadn't seen it like that yet. Perhaps that's the case here too. How did your bf deal with it?
>>
>>16557880
I'd order Thai instead of Chinese.

Eat while looking for an activity where you can meet other people.

See, no drama.
>>
I met a girl on Instagram, we talked online for a week and she seemed interested I Invited her over to my house but when she got here she was akward as fuck, I tried to loosen things up by offering her weed and we smoked a bit, but she was still kinda akward. I tried as much i could to start an interesting conversation (i have no trouble meeting new people ) but she seemed uninterested. Is it possible that she was depressed or has some kind of problems?
>>
>>16558079
>not including one night stands
These are the ones that matter most. An abundance of these means they see sex differently than you might see it.
>>
>>16557735
why do men tease women? always making us confused or flustered.
90% of the males i know do this.
>>
>>16558231
I just told him not to take it to heart when I'm being blunt and that I do value what he has to say.
>>
>>16558270
>Makes me confused and flustered
That's why.
>>
>>16558270
I thought girls like being teased, but im talking about going out, if its just a friend relation then the guy is probably just horny
>>
>>16558217
Food, then cuddling(if you're my boyfriend)

Even if she thinks she's not hungry, she is.
>>
>>16558254
Why do you expect randoms on the internet to somehow know exactly why she didn't want to talk to you? Maybe she was depressed, or maybe you're a fucking faggot, we don't know.

>>16558227
Not enough girls would. But usually if you have to ask if you're bothering her, you've already become an orbiter. Move on.

>>16558217
Girls are not a hivemind.

>>16558197
Over text, yes. But why don't you just ask her?

>>16558079
If you have to ask, yes.

>>16557990
Don't fucking ask her to compare dick sizes. Just be a good lover.

>>16557945
It's always creepy if you could have talked to her in person, but you decide to use the internet instead.
>>
>>16558197
There are certain ways women like to feel affection.

For me, personally, I hate feeling like you are romanticizing me. I hate sweet words because 99% of them have been in books or movies. It doesn't take much to pull something sweet to say out of your ass. And unfortunately, lots of players have blew it because they just spit that shit out to get pussy.

For me, affection with a man is a sensation/feeling. When I can tell how comfortable he is with me. The way we talk about things. How close he sits next to me. Touching me during lulls in conversations. Sharing secrets with me. It's the intimacy that we share when we do the normal things people do. Anyone can just say intimate things, but to act intimately during daily life is just, really how you confirm someone loves you and cares for you.
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>>16558278
But, why?
i don't see the appeal
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>>16558279
all my guy friends do it.
i think they get joy from my internal flailing about
>>
>>16558300
If you get flustered by a teasing comment then you're probably, at the very least, a little bit into me.
>>
>>16558079
>Not including one night stands.
But that's the shit that actually matters

>>16558270
Because that's the goal, usually. It's cute generally.
>>
>>16558312
Not that anon, but I get kinda confused by guys teasing. If I appear flustered, it's me sperging out because I don't know how to say stop without a man saying "Aw come on. I was just joking. No need to be so serious." or "You need to smile more." and that kinda shit.
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>>16557735
can i bleach my hair to this color? male friends say no
1/3
>>
>>16558320
Not without looking like a fuccboi.

I don't even know what woman finds this attractive outside of high school.
>>
Do most girls kiss strangers in clubs? Does it mean anything to them? What happens afterwards? And what does the guy say before that makes him worthy of kissing a girl he just met?
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>>16558320
this is me

2/3
>>
>>16558324
I never have. I've seen my friends do it. It doesn't seem to mean anything to them. I mean, I've never seen anything come out of it (ie they start dating, texting, etc) It's just a moment of horniness. They don't like getting club guys numbers because they don't see them as bf material. Just hook up/buy us drinks material.
>>
>>16558324

Can't speak for most girls, but most of my friends who're into clubbing certainly have. Speaking for myself, I'm not American and have been going out clubbing/dancing/drinking since I was 15. I've kissed a lot of guys. Sometimes, it's just because they're cute, we're tipsy and we happen to be dancing together. Sometimes we start talking, e.g I bum a cigarette and we have some kind of connection. I've dated people I've met in clubs, and so have most of my friends - sometimes it does turn serious (many of my friends have met their partners going clubbing, it's an easy way to meet people), sometimes, it's a one night stand, sometimes it's just kissing. Can be for fun, for forgetting your ex, or just for seeking intimacy.

Worthy of kissing a girl he just met? Haha, there's not some secret formula; it's depends entirely on the girl and the situation.

>>16558325

Don't.
>>
There's this boy whom I don't actually know but see fairly frequently. Sometimes he looks at me and at other times he deliberately avoids looking at me. What does it mean? I'm quite a bit older than him, which only adds to the confusion.
>>
>>16558344
>>16558351
Thanks! I'm just worried in the sense that I'm interested in a girl I'm sort of friends with and she would maybe find the idea of kissing me awkward since we know each other, but in a club some random guys could just say hey you are hot or something and end up kissing just like that simply because it's a club and they just met.
>>
For both:

How do I deal with my first serious infatuation, which I believe to be unrequited? He's quite a lot older and more experienced than me, never thought he'd be interested, but we hooked up a few days ago. We texted quite a lot beforehand, 5-6 times a day, and he seemed very into me, but I haven't heard from him for two days (ie since I left his apartment). My stomach hurts, I feel anxious and have barely eaten since we started speaking every day, I'm dizzy, I can't sleep, I can't focus on anything. I chainsmoke and listen to depressing music, haha. I actually passed out from not eating or sleeping yesterday. I've never, ever felt that way before, he has no idea how into him I am, because he'd be scared away immediately. I suspect he just wanted a fun hookup, and that's okay, he has no obligations to feel anything for me. I think he was dissapointed in me and expected more, as I'm very inexperiencd with guys.

But when will this go over? When will I feel normal again? Anything I can do? It's so overwhelming, I'm not myself and I can't function normally. It's a terrible feeling. I'm going out tonight to take my mind off everything, but I'll probably just get too drunk and feel very emotional. How do people deal with feeling like this? ugh
>>
Girls if you are currently interested in a guy you are not dating and some other guy asks you out will you turn it down?
>>
>>16558319
How is it even confusing?
>>
When is it acceptable to put your body type as "athletic" in dating sites?

Since there's little to no objectivity in this, couldn't someone just say they're "athletic/fit" when in fact they're closer to average but just size themselves up to feel better about themselves?


Girls (or dudes), at what criteria would you place "fit" people in?
>>
>>16558391

Depends on the situation, of course. I've had feelings for a guy for 6 months, I was convinced he had a girlfriend and wasn't interested in me, so I went on dates to move on and forget him. If I'm head over heels and I believe I have a chance, I wouldn't date other people. It wouldn't be enjoyable for me and I'd feel like I was leading them on. Dated a guy who was deeply in love with his best friend, I found out after we started getting more serious, she wasn't into him, but it still felt like shit. Wouldn't do that to other people. But of course it also depends on what you mean by interested haha
>>
If someone says "I found money on the street, wanna go out somewhere?" is it flattering or gross?
>I actually found money on the street
>>
>>16558392
Because I don't know if they are being friendly or flirtatious or aggressively flirtatious.

Because I don't understand why someone would joke with me about certain subjects some dude's joke about.

Because it may have been a bad joke.

Because it might be something that offends me and I'm not sure if they are trying to get a rise out of me.

Because if they did like me, then why are they making fun of me.

Because we may not be close enough to joke about the subject of the joke.

The list can go on.
>>
>>16558393

Are you an athlete? Do you look like you could be one? Mark yourself down as an athlete.
>>
Both:

I've been seing T for about 6 weeks now. Everythings wonderful, but since we are sleeping together (about 2 weeks), that's basically everything we do when we meet. I don't want to complain! We have amazing sex and i might be slightly addicted to his body... But i'm a bit afraid of neglecting the emotional intimacy. I don't want this to detoriate into a "let's meet up to have wild animal sex" thing. I really lile him and so does he. Everytime we try to organize somethingdifferent, something goes wrong and we end up in bed anyways (planned to meet, have to last-minute-cancel, end up meeting up after the other thing we had to do because we just HAVE to see each other and end up fucking cause it's way too late already to do anything else and because we are all over each other the second we meet. For example...) Should i just relax and have as much sex as we desire cause it's going to slow down sooner or later anyways or should i make an effort to organize other stuff?
>>
>>16558452
You sound a bit nuts.
>>
>>16558433
Not gross, but - weird. Just ask them to go out
>>
>>16558325
You'll have to bleach it first to lift the color. It'll be yellow when you're done but then use a toner. I use extra light ash(get in on Amazon or any beauty supply store) mix it with developer and apply that. It will turn the yellow bleached hair to a white/ash blonde. Don't wash it for like 48 hours though or the toner will wash out easily. Also make sure you condition your hair well because this process will fry it.
>>
>>16557746
Usually, if they are hot they send recycled because they already sended beforehand.
>>
>>16558325
Sure you can. But i STRONGLY recommend to go to a salon. You don't want to fuck qith bleach if you have no idea what your doing. Trust me
>>
>>16558479
>Are you an athlete

I went to the gym 3x a week these last 3 months, ~2x/week this past year. Went from benching 45 (the bar) to 140lbs. I can squat my bodyweight now and I started running a lot too.

>Do you look like you could be one?
That's the thing, I look pretty lanky - bigger chest and thighs but small forearms. People would and do assume that I don't work out, and when the shirt comes off I look somewhat average, but when I flex and puff up my chest I look really good. That's what confuses me.
Maybe they should just make a category called "average.5"
>>
is it worth it to register as an independent voter for namesake if you were a centrist to begin with. basically i went with republican because the democrats just seem like a too much of a forced together conglameration of ideals but these days i dont want to associate with repubs cause reasons but id still like to vote in primaries, sort of
>>
So if I have this girl I want to fuck and she seems to not have any problems, what can I do? We both are 19, but she lives on another city, I can go there, but how do we fuck? I'm really a nerd, don't go out, so what is the best I can do? I can't bring her where I'll stay because my sister is there, so, as someone inexperienced, who never even brought a condom or reverved a room or something, what should I do?
>>
>>16558525
ask for car bj
>>
>>16558525
Car sex.
>>
Girls, my ex (female, 27) wants to meet me (male, 27) to swap our stuff. It's not important things so I don't know if she wants to meet up for more than what it seems. How do I not blow this up if this is a test for her to maybe consider getting back together?
>>
>>16558532
Why would you even do something lile that?
If you have to, look good so you feel good about youeself, act polite and mature. Keep it short and friendly. Then go home and move on with your life
>>
>>16558391
If I had some kind of interest in the guy asking me out, I would accept. Usually I ask out people I'm interested in, though.

>>16558393
Noticeable muscles, or do some kind of sport.

>>16558489
Cutting back on sex for the sake of cutting back on sex isn't good for a relationship. As long as you're trying to do other things, it'll be fine.

>>16558532
You shouldn't humor getting back with her. Swap stuff and leave.
>>
Girl here
I enjoy going on Omegle to "sext" with guys. I use a fake name and I don't give them my Skype and Facebook, of course. We just type stuff about 69 etc and it makes me horny as fuck
Is this something bad?
>>
>>16558593
no
>>
>>16558079
>3 to 5 partners too many for a 19 yo guy?

I'd say general, who gives a fuck. It's only a big deal if you can't get over it.

But I'll also say, it doesn't really seem like that much (unless there's like 50 one nights stands that you're not counting).

I say this all as a guy who intentionally decided to stay abstinent (like I had girls literally try to pull me in to their bed, and turned them down because of that decision) until I was 24.

>>16558324
>girls in clubs

Some of these questions, I feel like guys are a lot more qualified to answer. I think this is one

Do most? mmmm... I'ma tend to say no, but a lot do.

Does anything happen afterwards? Not necessarily, sometimes people kiss people because they're just in the moment. Something about music, booze, and the higher energy of dancing just tends to uninhibit a lot of people.

What can a guy say to get it o happen? Nothing. Everyone is different, and it's a club. You can't hear each other anyway. If you're just dancing and vibing, that in itself will lend it's self to the scenario.

>>16558388
>getting over an infatuation

Take a deep breath, shout in to a pillow, and remind yourself you're being silly. Think of the stupidest, funniest thing in the world and have a good laugh (it's hard to feel anxious while you're laughing). Be with friends and try to not think about it. It will pass, but right now you're system is being flooded with hormones that are making you feel that way.
>>
>>16558624
Would you let your partner go to a club without you?
>>
>>16558489

You don't have to, but if it's bugging you that much just have a talk with him and see how he feels. Don't get whiny or overly-worried, just be casual and express your concerns. Tell him pretty much exactly what you told us:

"We have amazing sex and i might be slightly addicted to [your] body... But I don't want this to turn in to [just] a "let's meet up to have wild animal sex" thing. I like you more than that'

My girlfriend had similar concerns when we first started dating and became official. Our sex was so amazing she was afraid it would eclipse all other aspects of our relationship, but it's been 9 months since we started dating, and we have a pretty open and honest lines of communication where we're there for each other in a way that no partner before ever has. And we still have amazing sex (it's actually gotten better).

You don't have to cut back on sex or anything, just keep making an honest effort for more, and as long as you both do, things will tend to work out.
>>
>>16558628

Sure... but she kind of hates clubs (It wasn't until I took her to a few different ones than she was used to, that she realized they could be a lot of fun).

Even if she didn't, I'd have no problems because I trust her.
>>
>>16558628

Not that person, but do adults 'let' and allow their partner do things? My mom did that when I was 14-15. You talk about your boundaries and respect them, but I sure as hell wouldn't fuck around with a guy who wouldn't 'let me' go and enjoy myself with my friends - he can hang out with the guys, go clubbing and drink as much as he wants to too. If he wants to cheat and I'm not enough for him, he'll do it anyway - I wouldn't date a guy I didn't trust enough to do stuff alone. You still need your friends, time without your partner and room to have fun
>>
>>16558624

From the infatuated girl, thanks for the reply dude <3 I know it's silly, but I've never felt this way before, it's like being a 14-year old with a crush - extremely embarrasing and yes it's silly. I'm meeting up with my close friend tonight for drinks and I'm sure she'll make me laugh. I'm just not used to not being able to control my emotions or function normally, it's not a nice feeling, but it'll go out and take my mind off things.
>>
>>16557735
>>How can I tell if someone likes me?
>Ask them out.

I asked a girl if she will go to a coffee with me and she said she will
I don't know if she likes me tho.
>>
>>16558715

That's what the coffee date/any first date is supposed to be for; to feel each other out and figure out if you like each other and have potential.

Stop jumping the gun.
>>
>>16558715
Right, which is why you're going to flirt with her and see if she flirts back.

Babby's first date
>>
>>16558724
>>16558728
H-how to flirt?
>>
>>16558736
Google "SIRC Guide to Flirting." The "how to flirt" section begins about 1/4 of the way in.
>>
>>16558750
damn, that's a lot of text
>>
>>16558765
"How to flirt?" is a big question. They're packing subtle social cues learned over years into a single website.
>>
Either gender really, I just need help.

How do I regain some hope? I am just done with everything lately and can't stand anymore. I'm tired of trying to find love and having it blow up in my face (ranging from a girl dumping me for a felon twice her age, to a girl fucking my boss while dating me, to a girl telling me a month into us dating that really we were just FWB and she was still with her boyfriend who I thought she'd long broken up with, etc). People tell me to focus on different girls but christ it's the same with every girl. It's not even just me, it's literally everyone in my life. My sister-in-law is cheating on my brother, my uncle is cheating on his wife who is cheating on him, everyone I work with is cheating, it's everywhere. It's not even just romance. I work a shit retail job where I spend all day having to boss around a) high school/college kids who are immature as fuck b) dead beat middle aged druggies who are lazy as fuck or c) just complete idiots, come home to support my mother which drains all my money in the first place (while my brothers are off on their own not worrying a fuck about her being broke, hell they hit US up for money because they can't grasp the concept of not owning three cars while not working enough to pay for them, and while my abusive father is off living the retired life with his rich girlfriend and never speaking to any of us), I drink too much, I am depressed as fuck. I basically just work and come home to drink all day at this point. I don't even "enjoy" anything anymore. I just do things to pass my day. I used to enjoy so much, but now even doing simple things like playing video games feels like an absolute chore. I spend all day either suicidal and depressed or just angry as fuck at everyone and everything. I used to want to pursue writing as a career, now I just hope that I go to work and ISIS blows it up.
>>
What do I do to get girls to like me
>>
>>16558796
Find a new, more productive hobby. Any form of exercise will automatically make you feel better, if only a little. Also, stop "trying" to find love, just live life and see what you stumble across. It's more interesting that way and you don't have expectations that get crushed.
>>
What should I text this girl who tells me she's been sick and bedridden all day? We're close friends at the moment, and she doesn't want me to come over nor am I in a position to. She doesn't know what it is, but she's feeling horrible over it.

Girls, what kind of text would make your day in this situation?
>>
Do women like bluntness?

Say I approached you and said "hey you look beautiful" is this received well?
>>
>>16558807
As long as you don't look like a sack of potatoes, be funny. I'd fuck anyone with charisma / humour. Maybe grow your hair out long too (i heard a lot of girls like that, I do).
>>
>>16559077
Some do, some don't.

For the aspie girl I'm dating it's a must to make myself clear like that, but for other girls the same approach may be off-putting
>>
>>16559077
Do I know you or are you a stranger?
>>
>>16559077
I believe that generally bluntness works more effectively if you make it slick. For example, instead of "hey you look beautiful", say "hey beautiful" and keep cool, like..., don't start crying and jizzing yourself and you should be fine.
>>
>>16559077
Depends on his tone/approach. I hate guys who act like their up their own ass. It's very obvious when a dudebro yoloswag frat guy says "hey you look beautiful." The way he says it and looks scream "HUGE DOUCHE." But if he's more soft-spoken, charismatic about it, it's a nice compliment. Think Sean William Scott's approach versus George Clooney's approach.
>>
>>16559095
they're up their, derp*
>>
>>16559095
yes! this!
>>
>>16559077
I generally don't like being called beautiful unless it's by someone close. If a guy I'm not dating said it to me, it would scream "I'm shamelessly trying to get in your pants"
>>
I'd appreciate help from anyone willing.
>>16559183
>>
How the fuck do you ask someone out while they're working? Honestly, everything about it screams "WRONG" and "DON'T DO IT" but the signals haven't stopped in the year or so I've known this guy. I just really want to get clarity.

My idea is, the next time I talk to him, try to invite him somewhere, or casually ask when he hangs out at a certain bar, and say something like "Maybe I'll have to stop in when you're there."

And yes, I've told myself over and over again that his job is to be friendly to me, but it persists no matter what I do, so I really want to just grow some balls and get my damn answer already.
>>
Girls, how would you handle it if your LDR partner had serious drug problems but was willing to get treatment?
>>
>>16558324
No. I don't even go to clubs.
>>
>>16559271
Asking to go for a coffee on a lunch break or something would be the easiest way.

If you work for different companies it would be a bit weird if he turns out to not be interested and you might not be comfortable going back to that store while he's not working there.

If he's in the service industry and you're a customer then he can't really ask you out without being unprofessional so the first move is up to you.
>>
>>16559201
>>16559201
just go up to her and say "wow crazy weather we're having."
if she thinks you're cute, she'll probably buy into it, idk. or something like "dang sweet backpack"
>>16558391
depends on the situation. if I was actively getting closer to said guy, I would turn everyone else down. But if not, I'd date casually and drop instantly if the guy I was really digging asked me out. Source: How I feel in the immediate present.
>>16558393
if you can jog a mile without wanting to die, you can put yourself down as athletic. you're welcome.
>>16558433
just weird, unless you know them pretty well. if i barely know you, I'm gonna be like "uh wtf sure but so what?"
>>16558489
why not both? go with the flow, keep trying to organize stuff, if it doesn't pan out, have a conversation with yourself and decide whether you can continue that way.
>>16558522
can't vote in primaries as an independent. but do what you feel, bro
>>16558525
keep condoms on you at all times. watch for the signs, leaning into you, touching you, staring quietly. then kiss the harlot. assuming she's already dtf book a room, you can do it online, just make sure you can get it if you're under 21.
>>16558796
find something, even just one tiny thing, that makes you happy. even if it's rubbing one out twice a day. start with that foundation, build from there. it mostly sounds like you need to get away from the shit people in your life, though, and turn your brothers down when they ask for money. fuck them, you're the one helping your mom, not them. they can shoulder their own fucking debts. and i'd strongly consider moving away, anyway. think about yourself for once, because you need to. desperately. it's okay to be selfish, bro. it seriously just sounds like you need to take a step away and find out who you are, again.
>>16558807
cry
>>16559035
"you're gonna get better in no time, and if i could, I'd bring you some chicken soup."
>>16559077
beautiful is too much, start small.
>>
>>16559281
I wouldn't have dated someone who used drugs in the first place
>>
>>16559271
>casually ask when he hangs out at a certain bar, and say something like "Maybe I'll have to stop in when you're there."
I like this idea. You could also mention a cool place you went to (could be anything, a bar, a place to hike, etc), and if he seems genuinely interested, ask if he'd like to meet you there sometime. Also, are these conversations one-sided at all, or does he significantly contribute to the conversation? Because if he's just doing his job, I imagine he wouldn't go beyond the basics of small talk.

>>16559281
I'd be wary since my mother dated a recovering alcoholic and it ended horribly because he still had many other issues in his life (friends and family who were addicted to various drugs) and the mental issues that go along with addiction. I'd want to know how they got addicted and how long they've been doing drugs. If it was curiosity that got out of control I think I'd be more willing to accept it if he started relatively recently (like 1-2 years ago) and wants to stop before it seriously screws up his life. But if he comes from a family of drug users, that's a huge red flag to me. And preferably, he wouldn't be willing to get treatment for the relationship, but already in treatment for his own sake.
>>
>>16559290
service industry, ball is perpetually in my court as I'm a customer.

I figured after this long, the talking and looks would stop, but it hasn't, and he's professional enough that I doubt he'd make it uncomfortable. I'm noticing other servers giving me knowing smiles after he talks to me, and it's just making me overthink so I really would love putting an end to it, no matter the outcome.
>>16559300
Seemed like the best plan, as he told me once "I'm off at 11" and I was too stupid to ask "what are you doing then?" The conversations aren't one sided at all. In fact, he usually starts them. I never sit in his section, so he has to go out of his way to talk to me. I have been trying to ask more questions, and he actually told me my favorite shitty beer is on tap at the bar across the street from his place. So in a way I'm overthinking, in a way I don't think I am.
>>
>>16559314
This is cute, you should definitely go for it. Doesn't sound like fake worker friendliness at all.
>>
>>16559324
Thank you, anon! I'm gonna work on my sober balls, grab 'em, and give it hell as soon as I can.

It honestly never seemed like fake friendliness, right from the very beginning. I just told myself so in hopes I could diminish my own feelings, but it never works that way. Naturally, I should do the polar opposite! Thank you again for your help!
>>
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Girls or experienced males of /adv/, please help me understand something.

Note that I'm not trying to get this girl back or even damage her current relationship, I just want to understand her.

Basically, I asked my longtime crush out a few months ago. She said she had recently started dating another guy, one she feels really 'indebted to'. I asked her what does he have that I don't and she said "I can say what he doesn't have, but you do - and that's trust".

Typical friendzone bullshit. Alright, I'm a big boy, I dealt with it. But that other guy... well, for one, turns out he's divorced and twice her age. He's also super mega protective of her, basically doesn't even let her go to parties or even social events like our university Christmas party. Not only that, he actually pointed out several of her friends that he doesn't like and told her to defriend them on Facebook.

The kicker? She complies with fucking everything. Most of our friends in common are really angry at her and stopped caring a long time ago. Not me, though. I really want to understand why she acts that way. For what possible reason would she give everything up for a guy who she didn't seem to like very much to begin with?

I would really appreciate some insights, /adv/.
>>
To both. Weird question but how do I become more confident in my looks?. I use to be overweight and have more confidence then I do now. I am now in much better shape but I feel im still very quiet and introvert. I feel like im below average in looks and it really affects me
>>
where can I meet working class girls?
>>
>>16559416
She might have latent issues you had no idea about. He sounds abusive, with the potential for violence, and who knows what happens behind closed doors. I'm not 100% certain on the whys and wherefores but I can say if she is in an abusive relationship, she probably would feel indebted to him, especially if he's manipulative. Anyone who is manipulative could easily convince her it was all her fault and find reasons to make her stay.

Aside from that, she could have other reasons. I couldn't tell you for sure one way or the other.
>>16559420
look in the mirror and find something about yourself that you like. your eyes, a particular freckle, maybe the turn of your lips, anything, really. and start from there. tell yourself "okay this part of me is really great" and then slowly expand on that until you're looking in the mirror going "well I'm pretty damn attractive aren't I"
idk am i helping ?
>>16559431
literally everywhere. i hang out in bars and breweries.
>>
>>16559416
>I asked her what does he have that I don't
Ugh, I hate it when guys ask me this.

For this other dude, sounds like classic manipulative abusive asshole. She's straight about her not trusting him? He is cutting her off from her support group of friends? She's with him because she's "indebted"? That's no reason to be with him.

Typically, when a girl is in an abusive relationship she believes it's her fault and she deserves what he dishes out. Maybe she thinks he'll change, or she excuses his behavior (oh he doesn't let me go out because he has trust issues! He's been hurt so bad in the past, poor baby. I didn't want to go to that party anyway, I only need him.) Or he guilts her for his behavior (I've been hurt so bad! Am I not good enough for you? Would you RATHER see them than ME? Your BOYFRIEND? I thought you loved me... And for everything I've done for you.... No body would be with you if they really knew who you were. You're lucky I put up with your cruelty.)

As someone who grew up with a mother who has recovered from abuse in her youth, it always baffles me when people don't know the signs. I've been taught it my entire life. It's a rough thing to see, Anon.
It's desperately hard to get a girl to see what's going on. It ends up in a nasty cycle of "You just don't understand!" and feeling persecuted.

I hope that girl gets out of there.
>>
What are some pre/misconceptions you've heard of or experienced that virgin girls have about penises?
>>
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>>16559590
>Ugh, I hate it when guys ask me this.
I was a little jaded at that moment. I generally refrain from stupid questions like that. Generally.
Solid insight, though. Thanks.

>>16559436
You too. Thanks.
>>
>>16559595
Wat
>>
>>16559595
They don't expect them to stink.
And they're always surprised to find long-ass pubic hair.
>>
>>16557735
would you accept to cheat on somebodys girlfriend/boyfriend just to have casual sex?
>>
>>16557784
I don't think so. My dating profile pictures only include me, so there is no confusion or anyone else to compare me to.
If there was a reeeally good picture of me in a group setting where my then bf happened to be, than I might use it, but nothing showing physical contact.

Female
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Where do I meet somber, pretentious girls who are into stupid shit like existentialist philosophy and post-structuralism? Looks of pic related preferred.
>>
>>16559648
No, casual sex is a kind of overrated endeavor and I've been on the other end of that shit, so I wouldn't want to do it to someone else.
>>
>>16559670
Try /lit/.
>>
>>16559670
Dating websites that let you filter 30+ white women who own a cat and were never married. Also, tumblr. Useless women are all over tumblr.

Doubt they'll look like that, though.
>>
So, I want to get nudes from this girl I just started fucking. Mostly due to the fact that I'm going away for a few weeks for winter break, and I won't be able to see her.

I'm meeting up with her tomorrow before I leave, should I say something like "it would be hot if you sent me some pictures while I'm gone"
>>
>>16557735

>nympho tendencies

Straight guys:

When a female is always dtf, or pretty much turns every make-out into something more sexual, is it a turn-off?

Would you lose respect for her if she sucked your dick every time you met?

>afraid my boyfriend will take me for granted
>>
>>16559681
If she accepts I'm not always dtf, not into an inexclusive sexual relationship, and doesn't suck some other guy's dick behind my back?

She's fucking perfect, clone her and give one to every man on the planet.
>>
>>16559595
my first time sucking dick I didn't expect it to taste so salty and have salty fluid come out of it before ejaculation
>>
>>16559680
>"it would be hot if you sent me some pictures while I'm gone"
Not gonna lie, I winced just from reading it. Try getting her hot and bothered on the phone/online while you're gone and trying then.
>>
>>16559595
No one actually told me that the dick would become hard until I saw one IRL. I thought they were squishy like the rest of our boneless organs.
>>
>>16559696
This is the first girl I've had this sort of relationship with, so I'm pretty new to texting like that. What sort of things should I say to her?
>>
>>16559648
No. I don't even have NSA sex. Enabling a cheater is even worse.
>>
>>16558593
No
I did this before too, completely anonymous

I wouldn't do it if I had a boyfriend though, it would feel like cheating
>>
>>16559703
>"thinking of you *suggestive/flirty emoticon*"
she'll answer some sht like aww or oh really
>tell her what you wish you could do at that moment
>be kind of subtle

some guys just send dick pics when they want nudes and it's really hilarious and kind of pathetic, but if you two are okay with that kind of stuff and maybe take it humorously, you could just do that too
>>
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21 Male here. Never had a relationship before. Just started going out with a girl, we've really hit it off and kissed and "Slept together", but we havent actually had sex yet because we were both really tired, and have only really been on one proper date and known each other for a week.

Unfortunately she's gone home for xmas so I cant see her for a couple weeks, I wanna text her and call her at times (She wants me to as well, she even wants me to come visit when I can before she comes back to our Uni city for good in february) to keep up with her.

But I dunno how much is too much? I dont wanna be too clingy and put her off. But at the same time I dont wanna go days without talking to her because... I really like her. I wanna talk to her.

She went home this morning. Do you think texting her every other day give or take and having a chat is enough? Too much?
>>
>>16558227

>>16558292 has good advice. You put yourself out there, that's all you can do. Now move on. No more good will come of it. You don't want to be one of the people that are annoying to get a message from.
>>
>>16559745
Other anon.

If I draw a face on it, will I get a laugh?
>>
>>16558356
He likes you and/or doesn't want to seem awkward for staring/looking at you too long, as often as it happens.
>>
>>16558388
If he was interested in actually being with you, he would be texting you constantly like he was before. If someone likes another person, they go way out of their way to talk to/spend time with them.

Sorry, but it was either just a hookup or he decided during/after it that he wasn't interested in you as much as he thought he could be.

Please eat, stop smoking so much, and move on. Also, listen to pet sounds and cry. You'll feel better.
>>
>>16558522
Vote against trump in the primaries, plz. Thanks <3
>>
>>16558646
This.
>>
How should I get out of an obsession with a girl? How do I convince myself?
>>
>>16559778
Initiating conversation every other day or so is good. If she doesn't seem to want to talk much, don't force it.

This Xmas break, you get to learn self-control. You'll be proud of yourself and the mature way you handled it, even just a few weeks from now.
>>
>>16559842
Get a hobby.
>>
>>16559858
I have hobbies. I need a way that I can convince myself to "just be friends"
>>
>>16559842
Stop thinking that she'll be interested in you. If you're that obsessed, she won't won't be.
-female
>>
>>16559847

Well that sounds pretty damn useful because I suck at self control. I'll keep it as talky as she wants it to be.

Im just really worried because I really like this girl, I could see the relationship going places. We've got so much in common its ridiculous. And I just love being with her.

But I'm worried these few weeks apart will drive a bit of a wedge between us. Hoping the first time we see each other again we can pick things back up and keep the momentum going, to keep us going until she comes back here full time
>>
>>16558344
>They don't like getting club guys numbers because they don't see them as bf material. Just hook up/buy us drinks material.
But they're doing the same thing as those club guys as you describe it. As far as I can tell, they're on the same level.
>>
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--Update-- from the anon with the Italian friend

She broke up with her boyfriend. Before there was a lot of teasing and joking, so today I was straight forward with my goals. I want to have a nice trip, eat good food, see some sights, hang out with friends, and that I think sex with her would be amazing. And she said this.

I wasn't nervous before. But now I am. It's because of excitement. I've never had a chance to be with a girl this QT. and I genuinely like her. Which I've never had emotional feelings toward someone before.

Advice on how to stay calm? I'm like practically freaking out inside right now as I look at hotels in her city.
>>
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>>16557735
i dig this chick that works in fast food, but i don't know what the best time to ask for her number is (or if i should slowly build up to asking over several weeks, i haven't talked to her yet).

she works every tuesday so last week me and a friend ate there and waited for her to finish for 2 hours accidentally. i went to the bathroom at exactly 10 o'clock and she was gone.
at this point I'm thinking of just asking for her number along with my order

how would you like to be approached in this situation/should i let this one go?
>>
>>16559863
If possible, remove her from your life. I had this happen to me by circumstance (going to different universities), but I've gradually started thinking about her less and I'm getting over it. It still gives me pain to think about the good memories, but I'm starting to accept the fact that she never really liked me anyways (saw an email I shouldn't have).
>>
Guys probably gonna think I'm a fag for this but

I'm scared of getting blowjobs from my gf? I eat her out just fine but when it comes to that it's like.. I don't even know how to explain it. Just uncomfortable, not really scared. No clue why because I actually would LOVE to have my dick sucked and she's even willing to swallow but I can't get comfortable with it what the fuck is wrong with me
>>
>>16559976
>i haven't talked to her yet
>want to get her number
DO NOT DO IT.
Seriously, why the hell would you think that's okay? She's there to do her job, not to be flirted with by random fat customers. It made sense for the anon who was posting earlier because she already had a friendly relationship with the worker and he obviously likes her, but getting asked out by a random customer she doesn't know will most likely just creep her out. You'll only be able to pull it off if you're very attractive, and even then there's the chance that she has a boyfriend or just doesn't like being picked up. At least try to strike up normal conversation first, so you can gauge if she has any interest at all.
>>
>>16558796
It might seem callous or heartless to say this but you absolutely need to set some time apart for yourself. Rekindle old passions or create new ones like taking on meditation, writing in a journal, walking, boxing, sculpting/ceramics, rock climbing, kayaking, and any others that you may have been curious about joining. Once you have obtained an extracurricular activity you can start networking in your community by meeting others who share the same interest and create a stable support group to fall back on. What I'm trying to say is don't let yourself burnout because as cynical as it may sound the only time you will not be stressed is when you are dead. Hope I helped in any way. Btw I'm a female.
>>
>>16557735
Guys: What do you think if a girl you think likes you acts very sarcastic, or childish around you sometimes?
>>
>>16559842
Just ride it, it'll pass. Go on dates with other women if thats an option
>>
>>16558270
Because it works.
>>
Girls: How much more do you like big dicks than normal/small ones? Mines fairly average and I'm sort of okay with it, but I know girls must like more if they had a choice? For example, on /r/massivecocks some of the guys will get multiple very flattering comments from girls. I also saw in the search history of one of my female friends "big dicks", and I've even heard other females gossip about how hung a guy was. I just feel like in general women get more horny when it's a thick, meaty cock vs average Joe?
>>
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what the hell am i supposed to say to a girl i dont know her at all "nice weather ain't it gurl" doesnt seem like it would do. please help me anons.


also what is a good place to meet nice girls.
>>
>>16560100
I like them all sizes, under 4in gets iffy
>>
>>16560100
I'm a virgin so I can't really give good input, but big dicks kind of frighten me. I'm tiny and quite tight (can barely get two fingers in) so I feel like it would hurt very much. But who knows, maybe once you experience dick you want to keep "upgrading." I think if she actually likes you, and it's not a relationship based only upon the sexual aspect, she won't care.
>>
Japanese girl in Japan here. I am dating this guy who is here to teach ESL. The pay is not that good so he is only planning to stay here for a short while. My pay is pretty good though. Is there any chance that I can convince him to stay?
>>
Straight Women:

Do you actually find men attractive? I'm a straight guy to such a degree that I can't even watch porn that has guys in it because it's repulsive to me. Yet I find women that are even far from society's ridiculous expectations of beauty to be sexy. At one point I saw a somewhat misandrist tumblr quote that pretty much sums up my mentality. Something to the effect of "90% of women qualify for models, 90% of men qualify for cave trolls".

As a result, I experience cognitive dissonance when I try to process why straight women exist. Unfortunately, I tend to internally justify the thought with misogynistic "she's just taking advantage of him" views, even though I can't believe that's not the case nearly as often as certain subcultures would have me believe.
>>
>>16560105
I probably have like a 3.5 inch dick. I just fucked a girl for the first time and she didn't really comment on it which I was afraid of. She seemed to be satisfied with the sex and everything, I ate her out for a while and she seemed to have a good time. Is there anything I should be doing as someone with a pretty small penis?
>>
How to get a girl to send me nudes? We just started fucking
>>
>>16560114
Is "pretty good" enough to supplement his income? Depending on how long you've been dating, you could move in together. Though that would probably be weird and may not work out well if you guys haven't been together long, which is what it sounds like. You could try getting him a better job with the connections you have. But if he's planning on moving back because the money's not what he expected, it sounds like you aren't of high importance to him.
>>
>>16560100
If it's at least 5 inches, it's good. The best sex I've had was with a guy with an average/small dick. All my other boyfriends had bigger cocks, but that guy had more experience, hence he was better at it.
>>
>>16557780
>>16557787
>>16557798
>>16557806

Do people actually like this? I feel like if I were to do this with any of my hobbies I'd just bore the other person to death, so I never even make mention of them. Even when someone talks about them, I just respond somewhat halfheartedly using layman's terms.
>>
>>16560126
>But if he's planning on moving back because the money's not what he expected
Well that was what he planned
>>
>>16560114
I doubt it. He probably wants to have his own career, and I can't imagine that working out in Japan.

The fact is he would be dependent on you for a reasonable quality of life.
>>
>>16560105
You don't find big ones more attractive/manly? For example, for me, a round butt on a slim girl seems to make her much more attractive/womanly/OMG I can't look away/I need that in my life territory. Is it not the same with girls when they see a big dick on a guy they like?
>>
How can I get better at performing oral on a girl? I just did it for the first time and although I didn't really know what I was doing the girl said it was fantastic. I really love eating pussy.
>>
>>16560100
A bit above average is perfect, but any more than that and it starts getting too big.
>>
>>16560130
I think it's moreso when you're having a passionate conversation with your bro who has the same hobby. People like to listen in. Probably not so much when you're talking at someone who doesn't care that much.
>>
>>16560137
Practice and communication
>>
>>16560135
>The fact is he would be dependent on you for a reasonable quality of life
Is that a problem?
>>
New to having sex, should I still be jerking off or should I save all that for when I see this fwb I have? I probably see her once every 3 or 4 days.
>>
>>16560101
bump
>>
>>16560151
Yes? What if you guys break up? Then he's up shit creek. Beyond that, some people like being independent and not having to rely on someone else needlessly.
>>
>>16560120
I think most men are nice to look at. I don't find the average man ugly, most of the time I think he's ugly it's because he's fat. To any fat/chubby men reading this, it's very unattractive, don't eat so much. That tumblr misandrist is probably a lesbian. I'm pretty sure most women don't only like the top 10% of men. I certainly don't find them trollish, at least. Also, I feel the exact same as you, but in the opposite way. I cannot understand the attraction to very feminine women or big tits/asses. I find it very unappealing to the eye and think lean, more androgynous girls are far, far more attractive. I think the average female is rather ugly, and women in porn almost always repulse me, unless it only shows her from the waist down and she doesn't have a huge ass and isn't wearing something like tights or high heels. So I guess we're in the same boat, because I can't understand straight men. And I'm pretty sure dating men just for financial benefits, life security, etc is only a small percentage of women.
>>
>>16560137
Well, if she loved it and you loved it, it seems you're on the right track. But if you want to please her more, I'd pay attention to which movements/areas get the best reaction and focus on that.
>>
How to get this girl to blow me? Every time we hang out it gets really sexual with me fingering her and eating her out and her giving me a handjob and eventually fucking. But shes never given me a blowjob which is something I want from her because shes pretty terrible at handjobs. How can I suggest that this is something she should do?
>>
>>16560162
Yeah, it kind of makes sense that the flipside would be true. Just wish I could understand it better. As it stands, I've removed myself from the dating pool and taken regular hits to my self-esteem because I'm certainly not in the 10% despite taking good care of myself.
>>
>>16560162
What about bald guys? I feel like that immediately disqualifies me for a lot of girls
>>
Guy here. I'm interested in a coworker. We've gone to two concerts together as friends, but she gave me a long hug and an arm squeeze when we said goodbye.

Is that a signal? Or am I reading too much into her being friendly?
>>
>>16560056
If it's for the same reasons that I don't like being eaten out, maybe you don't like being the center of attention. Maybe you prefer to please. And bjs are being pleased in such a way that means the partner doesn't get any stimulation at all.

Maybe try having her masturbate while sucking you off? Or 69?

In the end, you know yourself best. This is something you can answer by practicing introspection. Analyze yourself. You already know your whole story and context.
>>
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am i too ugly to get a gf?
>>
>>16560252
You won't be if you lose weight and stop crying
>>
>>16560217
Yeah, personally I really like nice hair so bald guys don't usually stand out to me. I think it helps if you have a beard and are muscular. Like a lumberjack look, you know?

>>16560230
Was the concert of particularly emotional songs? She may have been caught up in the moment. Try asking her out sometime, not explicitly as a date, but just to hang out somewhere where you can talk. Try gauging her interest from that. The hug/squeeze sounds romantic, but it depends on her emotional state at the time and how touchy-feely she is in general.

>>16560252
You have a pretty cute face. Just lose some weight and stop attention-whoring.
>>
>>16560252
Go to /soc/'s rate threads, this is not for AtOGA

>>16560151
>>16560114

IIRC, American/Western culture (I'm assuming he's American), when compared to Japanese culture, is much more individual based. You're expected to mostly be able to handle things on your own. Having your own independence and survivability without depending much on others.

The exception for this is mothers with children. So it's a masculinity thing to be able to provide for your wife and kids.
But if you take away the kids, a girl is considered a gold digger if she's with a guy who is supporting her.

You're his girlfriend. It can be awkward if you're helping with his bills. It's like he's "not man enough" to be able to take care of himself.

So that's some of the cultural reasons why he might turn down your offer.

But he might be above that old way of thinking.

Another side, (which I'm not sure if it is American centric) is his 'escape plan'. That's what other anons are referring to when they say, "What if you two break up?"

It's generally expected that when dating, the main reason to stay together is because you like each other and breaking up is when you don't like each other.
When you bring in finances, it adds a reason to stay even if you don't like each other. If he establishes a life in Japan, making friends and colleagues, he's not going to want to leave. If wants to leave you, unless he finds another job, he'd have to leave the entire country and go back to America (or wherever he's from).
He might be inclined to stay with you anyway, which would make him bitter and unhappy.

It's a huge commitment to rely on another person like that. It's creeping its way up the scale towards 'getting married' and 'having children'.

Are you ready for that? Is he?
>>
For girls. Guys can chime in if they way.

I've got a friend who lives across the country, we've known each other 4 years and are pretty close. I've developed feelings for her and I'm not entirely sure but it seems like she feels the same way. It's hard to tell, since we mostly just text. Some days she's flirty (I mean she's "anonymously" sent me a nude before), but other days she's not. We spoke on the phone today and she mentioned a coworker she's got a crush on. Was she just doing that to get a reaction out of me? I'm going to be visiting her in about a week (and staying at her place) and was planning on making some sort of move then. Just something simple like holding her hand. But I feel like I should tell her how I feel sooner rather than later but that would have to be over the phone. I'd prefer something face-to-face since that's more personal, but like I said time might be a factor. At the same time I don't wanna wreck our friendship. How to approach this?
>>
Girls: Where do I find a quiet, weeby girl who's not too crazy to be friends with?
>>
>>16560325
Online is probably your best bet
>>
I've been using online dating for about a year and a half. I had one successful relationship from that which lasted maybe 4 months before it went bad. She was bipolar and I sucked at handling her episodes.

Where can I meet cute artsy girls? I don't care for "hot" women. I want cute ones. I'm out of college so I don't have that to rely on either.
>>
>>16560340
starbucks
>>
>>16560311
I can't say if she's feigning or not since I don't know her, but does she seem like the manipulative/indirect type? It could also be that she likes you but gave up because you've known each other for so long and her flirting has been fruitless. You could try asking more about him to get a better idea of the situation. I don't know how to approach it most tactfully, but perhaps try flirting with her for now to see if she's still interested in you, and if she is then save more direct moves for when you're together.

>>16560333
This. I almost started skyping with a guy from /a/ because of a discussion in a trap thread that got personal, but in the end I chickened out. I think if you look in cons and anime clubs you're more likely to find the more exuberant weebs. Online communities are good, probably not 4chan though since it's hard to build friendship with a single person when you're (almost) all anonymous.

>>16560340
If you're near a big enough town you may be able to find some art exhibitions that a young artist might be at. Otherwise, the internet seems to have the highest density of those types. You might need to get more hands-on than online dating sites, though. Like befriending more innocent-seeming girls on tumblr.
>>
34-year-old femanon here. I divourced with my husband last year. I have no kids. What are my chances of finding someone else?
>>
>>16560288
>Are you ready for that? Is he?
Probably
I am not interested in kids though.
>>
>>16560396

Have you taken care of yourself? Probably still pretty good but finding decent people to date is tough.
>>
>>16560396
>no kids
Chances are pretty good. My mom's major trouble with keeping relationships was the fact that she has children. You'd probably have the best luck with other divorced men, since you could relate on that experience.
>>
>>16560423
>Have you taken care of yourself?
yes
>but finding decent people to date is tough
is it extremely tough?
>>
>>16560424
This guy said it is tough though >>16560396
>>
>>16560363
No, I'm fairly certain she's not manipulative or anything like that. Awkward/shy definitely. Also deals with depression/anxiety (if those details make a difference at all). According to her, this dude is fairly "normal" and like a skater dude in his 30s. I'm worried about coming on too strong, but I will give flirting a try.
>>
>>16560425
>is it extremely tough?
only one way to find out
>>
Girls...

There is this qt i know, we havent seen eachother in 8 months, we met at work, i left, came back

Now i see her but she seems to ignore me, we would barley talk before due to different work shift and department, but when we talked we clicked and we had a lot in common

Anyways how do i get things to be the way they where before?

She used to talk to me all nice and always be sweet to me now she ignores me and stuff,
Also I haven't really gotten any actual time with her alone

Wat do???
>>
>>16560396
Probably no different than if you hadn't been married, which, admittedly, is not going to be as easy as when you were 25, but still not beyond reason.
>>
how do men generally feel about chubby women/bbw who are secure and confident in their bodies

not in the "real women have curves" way but in a sincere way

would you be attracted to a woman with a larger figure if her personality and attitude was good?
>>
>>16560533
i like chubby girls but only if they're not sassy

sorry, you sound sassy. nothing is worse than that
>>
>>16560533
>would you be attracted to a woman with a larger figure if her personality and attitude was good?
To a point, yes, but, in my experience, overweight women seem to have a terrible chip on their shoulder about it.

Fitness is a big part of my life, and it never takes long before they stop appreciating that and start resenting it.
>>
>>16560544
>overweight women seem to have a terrible chip on their shoulder about it.
This is so shitty, it seems so easy to lose weight.
>>
>>16560554

it's actually not
>>
>>16560556
Literally just limit your calories. I've been underweight my whole life without ever being on a diet and I'm not particularly active. I just don't eat large servings.
>>
>>16560556
If you don't have a medical condition, you just eat fewer calories than your TDEE.

>>16560554
But that would require far more effort than making excuses and emotionally bullying their SO, anon.
>>
>>16560569
>>16560584

this isn't just an off the cuff opinion, it's medical fact

weight loss isn't the same for all bodies, it's based a lot on genetics, hormones, and metabolism
>>
>>16560592
It's difficult because people aren't prepared to make changes to their lifestyles. It's much easier to remain a fat fuck who eats whatever they want in whatever quantities they want. There is an element of nature in it, true, but it's not the main part. The main part is environment and lifestyles
>>
>>16560592
>weight loss isn't the same for all bodies, it's based a lot on genetics, hormones, and metabolism
half true. yes, some people burn more calories naturally due to genetics, hormones, and a higher metabolism due to other factors. but that other anon is correct- the answer is to eat less calories than you burn. it just may need to be fewer calories than another person, but the principle is the same.
>>
>>16560592
If you eat fewer calories than you expend, how can you not lose weight?

Is your body an extra-physical anomaly that can create energy on its own?

Also, you're really proving the veracity of my "chip on the shoulder" assessment.
>>
>>16560618
>Also, you're really proving the veracity of my "chip on the shoulder" assessment.
kek, fat girls. when will they learn?
>>
>>16560592
It is a medical fact, but not for those reasons. Read the studies. People flub their self-reported diet entries and blatantly lie to researches and themselves about how much they eat and how often they work out.

I know it's hard to lose weight. I used to be morbidly obese and cut my bw in half without having to resort to surgery, just diet and exercise. I don't see why it matters whether it's hard or not, though.
>>
Femanon here, I tmi'ed a guy... because I was actually too into him and just nervous/self-conscious about sex.
Should I apologise?
>>
>>16560627
Possibly. Depends on how well he took it.
>>
>>16560627
>tmi'ed a guy
Is that some bizarre Urban Dictionary-tier sex act?
>>
>>16560638
Nah I basically spilled a lot about depression I went through, car accident and so forth...
I came across as having a lot of baggage.
When in truth none of that really bothers me lol.
I was just self-conscious about getting naughty with him (*insert virgin*)
>>
>>16560646
I don't think an apology is needed here, then.
>>
>>16560646
You're probably best to forget about it, because you'll probably spill even more spaghetti if you try to apologise.
>>
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Why do guys always try to spend their money on us females?
Is there any way to to tell a man spending/trying to spend his money on you to stop without hurting his feelings/pride?
>>
>>16560650
>>16560652
Alright if you guys say so...
>>
>>16560661
>Alright if you guys say so...
Am I sensing a reluctant acquiescence? If so, I apologise wholeheartedly for offering advice with which you do not agree on this board dedicated to the the provision of advice, upon which you solicited advice. If you feel the need to further relive an already uncomfortable moment with your prospective amour, contrary to all advice offered, please do so, by all means.
>>
>>16560677
whoa mane hehehe
No no I appreciate it.
You can't really sense tone here, I'm sorry you jumped to that conclusion straight away.

It was a more embarrassed / sad '...'
appreciate the advice though.
>>
>>16560602
So much this.
>>
>>16560658
>Why do guys always try to spend their money on us females?
he's probably doing whatever he thinks he can to show that he wants you. obviously he's not good at being desirable or you'd want him already
>>
>>16560677
Goddammit this is making me crack up too much.
Good show.
>>
>>16560288
>>16560276
sorry
>>16560260
so yes
>>
>>16560782
That may make sense.
I always turn down things unless they are forced on me.
I don't feel comfortable with guys spending lots of money on me.
It happens more than i would like to admit
I'm also a poor fag, so there is that.
>>
Which is more meaningless: shitposting on 4chan or having a crush on a high school teacher?
>>
>>16560811
meaninglessness cannot be quantified by definition, because it's basically 0. 0<0 doesn't make sense

shitposting is meaningless. wanting to fuck a teacher says something about you, so it has at least some value
>>
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>>16560658
>Why do guys always try to spend their money on us females?
They think it will impress you and/or set himself up as a provider figure.

I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum. I spend very little on dates, and I'm only willing to spend substantial amounts of money on people once I consider them very close friends.

No solution particularly comes to mind for your situation.

>>16560592
There are also facts you're glossing over. Like the fact people fudge their caloric intake all the time, or the fact you're not exempt to thermodynamics. You may burn through fewer calories than your friend, but all that means is you need to consume less than them too.

Is it unfair at times? Sure. But that's life.

>>16560533
Depends. I actually prefer chubby women along the lines of pic related, that's the kicker. But I see obese women call themselves thick or what have you all the time.
>>
>>16560817
>that blur
>>
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>>16560832
No bullying
>>
My mom is pressuring me to date. I have no interest in getting married having kids or anything. What do?
>>
>>16560890
It's your life. Tell her it's not your interest and to get off her back.
Maybe encourage her to volunteer with kids if she's so grandbaby crazy?
>>
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So I asked this girl that I haven't seen for some time for a drink. She told me to message her. What do I say? If we do go on a date how do I act? I'd like to avoid awkward silences if anything.
>>
hey girls would you date a guy who has everything(looks, personality, politeness, confidence, knowledge, etc) but has a shit job and is poor(lower class, not really poor like those starving guys in Africa)?

I'm not that guy. I just wanted to know
>>
Is it too clingy to check in on a sick girl daily, to see how she's doing? I'm kind of concerned for her because she isn't well, but I have little else to say or offer at the moment.
>>
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>be me
>say "hey" at girl through Facebook
>she replies "hey :)"
>what do?
>>
>>16558489
This seems to happen with every relationship. At the start, it'll feel like a wild fling whenever you see eachother. It will soon start to calm down though. I wouldn't thnk too much into it.
>>16559077
I would prefer it if you approached my to chat for a little bit and then said that. Depending on how you look, I would take it as a fuckboy sort of thing if you were the typical chad, but I don't know how I would take it if you looked different. But as another anon said, it depends on the tone as well.
>>16559416
Sounds like she's afraid of him.
>>16559420
Get frequent haircuts, moisturise your face for better skin, shave constantly etc.
Basically, just care about maintaing your appearance and you should start to feel better.
Buying new clothes could help too. Look online for certain styles you like then buy the shit out of them.
>>16559778
Why don't you call her? I would prefer it if I got calls once a day-every two days to see what's been happening. I would ask her how she felt about it first.
>>16560100
In porn I love them.
IRL it's not a big deal for me. My bf is around 7-8" and it's slightly too large when we fuck. If I was with a guy larger it would just be uncomfortable.

> gurth>lenght
>>16560120
Ofcourse we do. I don't know why you're so repulsed by the male body but just imagine that straight females feel the same way about men as you do for women.

PS. porn guys tend to be fucking gross anyway unless you dig long enough to find a decent looking guy.
>>16560137
Communication.
Start teasing around her pussy first, or licking her from her tits down etc.
Start slow and then work your way faster. Mix up the speeds too after a while.
Since it's your first time as well, it may not have croessed your midn to also use your fingers whilst licking her clit. Makes me cum everytime.
>>16560152
I don't see why you shouldn't wank.
>>16560181
your cock propably stinks
>>
>>16561192
Yes as long as he was financially stable to have at least have a house and a car and had ambitions to get a better job. I don't want to be the one bringing it all the money. I would want to be in a relationship where we both bring in a decent amount of money.

>>16561225
Shit
I meant length
>>16561193
I don't think it would be.
>>16561215
Ask her what she's doing maybe?
>>
I hear women who give birth often shit themselves because of the pushing. is this true?
>>
>>16560817
I have a friend who i am very close to, who lives on the other side of the planet.
We've been friends like 4 years.
Well he keeps buying me things. On steam i had to take my wishlist off cause he was buying them all for me.

When he had my address from when we used to share snail mail, i had mentioned in passing that i had dropped my 3ds and it broke. Two weeks later i get a delivery of a brand new one.
I was really flattered and i thought it was sweet.

I just want him to save his money, put a deposit on a house or something way more important that me.
he wants my new address so he could send a christmas gift.
>>
>>16561236
Yes
>>
Hey girls [this is also a question for guys]. How do i fuck properly?

Like, I know to put penis in vagina of course, and I've done it multiple times with my girlfriend, but I hardly feel anything, and I'm pretty convinced I'm doing it wrong.

How far out should I pull before going back in when fucking?
>>
>>16561242
Honestly it doesnt sound like he's going to stop in the near future on his own volition. If I were in a situation like theirs I'd tell them to tone it down, that they're just being overbearing with it.

It might damage his ego, but sometimes there's no getting around that.

>>16561236
Yes. Birth isnt a very pretty process.

>>16561215
Try to talk about upcoming events or shared interests I guess. I hate openers like that, or short responses.
>>
>>16561236
Hahahaha fucking hope I see this one day.
>>
>>16561236
Yes it can happen.
I doubt anyone cares at that point, have you ever seen a baby being born? You ain't bothered about what she's shitting when you see what's hanging out of her vag.
>>
I am going to the movie with my oneitis, and it's the midnight screening,

Not sure if this a date or not.

But any tips for my first date?
>>
>>16561307
Don't show her your butt until she gives you the green light
>>
I'm grabbing a cup of coffee with a girl, we have already kissed at a club last week. Is it expected of me to go for it again or just act casual and try to get to know her ? I mean we were both kind of drunk so not sure if it counts.
>>
Girls. Were you afraid/anxious about sex before your first time? Why? How did you solve it?

My girlfriend is a virgin and is afraid. She said she wanted to stop having intimacy because even thinking about sex made her anxious.

When she agreed to stick to foreplay until she's ready for intercourse, she still wanted a few weeks of nothing to think about it and "come back excited".

I don't know how to help.
>>
>>16561423
Yes. It was because of the pain that people described it as and because I had no experience with sex.
I just fucked my bf when I was really horny and couldn't care less about the pain. However, when he put it in it hurt badly and turned me off after around 2 minutes so we had to stop. We then fucked around a week or so later and I wasn't in pain.
>>
>>16557735
Guys

When you initiate conversation with a girl, is it usually because you like her?

How do I know (online) if a guy is interested in me. Is it about initiating? Because I haven't spoken to him since the beginning of this year. Not sure if I should wait for him to start a convo or if I should move on
>>
>>16561320
I had a similar situation a few weeks back. Got drunk and kissed this guy. We exchanged nimbers and met a week later. It honestly was no question, cause we were all over each other the moment we saw us. After that, we proceeded to more appropriate activities like grabbing a coffee, going for a walk or go watch a movie. We were a bit too deep in physically, to begin with, but we just rolled with it and tried to get the rest on par by doing fun stuff and talking alot. Don't think about it too much. Let things develop naturally and go with the flow. Good luck anon! I hope you two have awesome chemistry.
>>
Both:
I startet dating this wonderful guy about 5 weeks ago. Do i have to tell him i'm on SSRI's? Cause it never came up and i'm already much better off, even starting to slowly decrease the dosage with the goal to stop completely in spring. It's not that i don't want to tell him, if it ever comes up. But it feels weird and forced to tell him: "uhm, just so you know, i'm on antidepressants.". So - weird... What do adv?
>>
>>16561508
If he was super into you he would have messaged you. It could be that he though you weren't interested too though so if you are as into him as I think you are based on this post just message him.
>>
>>16559431
Shitty bars.
>>
I met this girl a few months ago.

I came to her, we went out, we hit it off and were together after two weeks.

Thing is she's always seemed not that into me. She would push away dates where physical intimacy would be involved as explained here >>16561423
and I was the most affectionate of us too. She said she was afraid of sex since she's a virgin, that she's not mature enough and not "there yet" and doesn't "know who I am".

I finally snapped and asked if she was attracted to me and her answer was "I have butterflies every time I see you but I don't think I am. i'm not there and I got carried in this retlationship thinking this is what I wanted".

I feel strangely empty right now, but I just need to know why someone would act like this.
>>
>>16561597
Also we just broke up at her initiative because basically she "likes me" but isn't attracted to me.

If that makes sense.
>>
How bad of an idea is it to date a friend considering you won't be able to completely avoid them once it's over due to a mutual circle of friends?
>>
>>16561604
If you're looking to date in hopes of a relationship, you're good, the best relationships come from being friends first. If you're just looking for a fuck, though, not a good idea.
>>
Freshman in college here (male)

met a cute girl and while we haven't had a wealth of in person contact (I only see her after one class, and usually for only an hour or two) We've texted every day for long periods of time. I'm planning on asking her out soon but the nuances of dating are confusing and weird me out, as I've never really dated before.

As far as I know there are generally two ways of forming a relationship: The first is sort of like "will you be my girlfriend" where you confess and then you're dating, that's it. The other way is the actual "dating" method, where you sort of test the relationship by going on a series of dates, followed by an expression of commitment.

I guess my question is if it's naive to think that the former method will work fine. Can I ask "Will you go out with me?" and expect a response without planning some sort of escapade to a diner or a museum or some shit. Of course, we'd probably do those things eventually, but I'm not sure if it's expected to go on dates before you actually date. Should I just go with the flow and ask her out and see what happens?

Question mostly for females who want to critique my approach, but any gender is fine I guess.
>>
Guys,

If you had to guess, what % of you are cheaters, realistically? I'm not judging individuals because not everyone is good and not everyone is bad... just wondering about the average.
>>
>>16561723
just invite her to watch a movie at your place.
>>
For girls, Which is most important

>Being physically fit
>Successful
>Great personality

and additionally what constitutes a "great personality?"

If I was just successful (9-5 job with good pay) and had a personality that a girl loved, would that be enough?

(I've been working on being level-headed / sensible / stopping aspie interests like music subcultures etc but it's made me really boring as a result so im working on getting my funny back. I don't mind being thin but sometimes I wonder if it would change things to have a bit of bulk)
>>
>>16561737
As far as I'm aware, none of my friends have been unfaithful. Nor have I. It's hard for me to make that kind of guess because I surround myself with people who have values similar to mine. It's not a good sample.
>>
>>16561741

my question is moreso "how to enter a relationship and solidify the terms" rather than "what should I do for a date" I guess that's a bit helpful but still, I live in a dorm with no tv so
>>
>>16561746
None of those are as important as chemistry. I notice guys are always trying to fit some mold in order to get chicks. The guys I want the most are the ones I feel like could be my best friend in a relationship. Those are the guys who I don't wanna let go of when dating.

A "great personality" is just some mold that people are trying to fit you into..

I've dated physically fit and also chubby guys. I've dated poor guys and guys with money... shy guys and guys with charisma... none of these things made a difference as much as feeling that I was connected to the person on a totally non-superficial level.

Right now I am dating a guy who is basically broke, and pretty chubby. I'm so attracted to him though because we have the same sense of humor, same interests(video games, music, politics etc.) and we understand each other as people. He is also very honest about who he is so I never have to guess if he's putting on a show or anything.


>stopping aspie interests like music subcultures
please don't stop liking the things you like, its what actually makes you interesting. Don't label things as "aspie" and then brush off something good. I've always said one of the most lovable things is a guy who is focused and passionate about something.
>>
>>16561746
They are all important
>>
>>16561765
that's really nice to hear. thanks.
>>
>>16561737
Statistics say about 1 in 5. So the minority. Personally I don't know anyone who has because of >>16561749
>>
>>16561777
>>16561749
Hmm thanks, I was reading a book that says if you're worried about something you should be aware of the statistics so your mind doesn't become paranoid.
>>
>>16561776
Sure.

This might be me personally, not all chicks are the same, but the more a guy tries to impress me the more I get turned off. Would rather go on a date to see if theres a connection than to be impressed.
>>
>>16561780
Well it sounds like you got something meaningful in that respect. If you're worried about infidelity, stick with guys who surround themselves with wholesome and moral people. You'll be selecting for those with the lowest odds.
>>
>>16561423
I don't want to get pregnant, so I'm waiting until I'm in a position to get the most effective birth control and be able to handle if anything does go wrong.
>>
>>16559812
It's not that he ever ends up staring too long, but that sometimes he clearly doesn't want to make eye contact at all. Which leads me to think that either he's extremely shy, or he's wary of me. I mean, I know myself what it's like to catch the unwanted eye of a stranger.
>>
>>16561789
That makes a lot of sense.
>>
>>16561754
don't force it. After a couple of dates if things are going really well and you'd like to see her more than say twice a week, you can ask her to go official.
>>
guys: do you find pregnant women attractive?
>>
>>16561795

eehh, Thats a bit slower pace than I'd like but I guess you're right. Thanks.
>>
>>16561803
no
>>
>>16559648
Yeah, but I'm desperate.
>>
>>16561803
no, from a purely physical standpoint.
The fact that I might have to take care of a child later is even more of a turn off
>>
For either.

I just recently moved across country, maybe 2 weeks ago. I have a girlfriend in ny, while I'm in ca. We've been dating since april. The day I left we both had fits of tears, and honestly it was a good day, we really connected at a high level and I loved it.

Now that I'm away though it's been itching at me to get out of the relationship and just focus on the job and friendships I have here for a while, or pursue other girls. I wouldn't do the latter while with her, so I'd have to break up. Is this just transitional blues? I'm feeling really mixed up about all the positives and negatives, I feel like they're about even. Should this be the case?

Thanks
>>
>>16561875
Do you plan to go back or does she plan to go to you?
>>
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>>16561307
Just back from the theater, she bring her brother along, and let her brother sit next to me

Fuck this world
>>
>>16561910
I'm not going back. I offered for her to come and she declined, saying it'd be at least a year.
>>
Boyfriend wants to hang out with his ex because they were good friends for a couple months after they broke up. I of course am riddled with anxiety about it and am trying to be cool about it but I can't. I always tell him that he should hang out with her even though it makes me feel horrible because I want him to be happy. He swears there are no feelings left in terms of sexual or emotional and that i have nothing to worry about.What do I do the anxiety and pain it causes me is too much.
>>
Both sexes:
I'm a 21yo semi-involuntary female virgin (meaning I've had chances, but only with people I wasn't interested in).
Now, there's a guy in my class that likes me. Initially, I liked him a lot too. The more I get to know him though, the less sure I am. He's physically pretty much exactly my type, I can't think of a thing I'd change. He's also smart, kind and sweet. We have similar interests, similar goals and similar backgrounds.
The downside is, he's not funny, at all. I don't mean he's always serious, I mean his humor doesn't match mine in the slightest, and to me he seems very childish. He often has trouble understanding sarcasm and can't always read people well. He's 23, and many people think he's a teenager based on how he acts.
So basically, should I give it a shot, or not? I'm pretty sure he's never had a relationship either and he definitely likes me in a romantic way, and I don't want to be the first person to fuck him over. But I don't want to end up with 34 cats either, and maybe it could work out after all?
Can someone with more experience give some insight?
>>
>>16562113
First off, no.

Secondly, you should probably take a closer look at yourself to figure out (a) why it is you aren't attracting fully compatible guys and (b) why you've not found any to pursue yourself.
>>
>>16562118
I'm pretty ugly and I don't go out a lot. I make friends easily, so I don't think there's anything major wrong with my personality.
I do pursue guys occasionally, but so far it hasn't worked out.
>>
>>16562113
Try to go on dates with him, no need to rush with getting frisky, you first want to see if his personality traits are that much of a distraction from his other features.

If he's really annoying you with his behaviour, tell him, maybe he didn't even notice it himself, and maybe he'll improve, giving you a better partner in general.
>>
So I'm really hung up on my coworker. She's perfect, checks every one of my boxes.

But she's married and idk if she'd cheat, and I wouldn't ever sleep with a married girl.

How do I get over her and stop being depressed because I'd never get to be with her?
>>
>>16562125
Even if your looks are screwed up on the order of needing cosmetic surgery, I think you'd be less ashamed of yourself for taking that step than losing your virginity to a clown.

This is purely a gut feeling, but I get the impression that he's not nearly as amazing as you say he is.
>>
hey first time posting here not sure how it goes...
So I've been with this girl for over a year and I'm her first bf. She is perfect in everyway and we love each other so much but I get jealous whenever this guy comes online at whatsapp the same time as she does. even though she doesn't talk with him. This is causing a lot of stress in my otherwise perfect relationship. How do I get over my issues?
>>
>>16562134
Of course he's not perfect, but to me he's pretty much physically ideal. Just the physical though, not his personality. He's personality is... fine. I get along with him. But I know a lot of people I enjoy talking with, a lot more.
>>
>>16561875
Bump
>>
Yesterday I went out with a girl who I've had a crush on for quite a while. Everything went well and we both had a great time. However, for some reason my brain has suddenly stopped feeling attracted to her. It's like I can only feel attracted to girls I can't have and the second there's actually a possibility that we could become a couple my brain aborts. Does anyone else have this problem?
>>
how 2 aquire girl that seems pretty happy with her life but she's single
>>
JOB HELP!

So, about me. I'm a reasonably presentable and hard working young white male, age 23 living in Los Angeles. I'm working on going to school for an AA in Psychology, just about finishing up and ready to transfer to Cal State LA. For a few years I worked at Chipotle and the consistency and pay was great, but I eventually got sick of seeing fucking idiots getting promoted for being buddies with management. The work was really exhausting as well. Right now I work in retail and, while I don't hate the work itself, there's just no fucking money in it. I make about 1/3 of what I used to because of such short shifts and limited hours. I want to start getting experience that will be worth a damn in the Psyche field when I start job hunting post-graduation from my BA two years from now and hopefully something that will pay a little better than minimum wage. What are some good places to start off?

I was thinking maybe an after school daycare program or something like that, but the only one I could think of, my old middle school, isn't hiring because of budgetary issues. Any ideas?
>>
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What a bigger hinderance in dating for a male in the West, being non-white or being short IE below 5'9?
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