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Boyfriend lied to me

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I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now and when we got together he told me he worked at a packing warehouse making a little above minimum wage. He lives in a tiny one bedroom apartment and lives like someone that's on that kind of salary so I never questioned it. I never really cared though because he was a really sweet guy and I liked being with him. My friends always criticized me because he dresses like a poor person and he never took me out anywhere fancy and seemed like he was going nowhere in life. Even my mom told me to find another guy but even though he was broke, I loved him and enjoyed being with him.

It was all a big farce though. It was our anniversary a few days ago and he told me he had a confession to make. He said he's not actually a warehouse packer, he's an electrical engineer and he also inherited a ton of money from his father so he's also extremely wealthy. I didn't believe him as we had this conservation in his crusty broken down apartment but he showed me his degree and pictures of him at work and all this stuff.

I was pretty taken aback. I asked him if he was just lying to me for 3 years and he said yes and he said sorry. I was pretty upset and I told him he's a jerk and I got up to go home. He stopped me and said he loves me and he wanted me to know because he wants to marry me. I was too upset to enjoy the proposal and I just went home without saying anything. I feel a little betrayed, I've never once lied to me but he's been lying to me about so much this whole time. It makes me wonder, what else is he lying to me about? I feel like he just thought I had bad intentions for being with him and thought bad of me the whole time.

Am I overreacting, should I forgive him? Am I just overthinking it? I have difficulty knowing he can lie to me for so long. How can I marry him? He's a lying jerk..maybe.
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>>16413284
>Am I overreacting, should I forgive him?
No, and no. I would be so fucking furious this fucking cunt wasted 3 years of my life.

I would rather be with a LITERAL homeless guy who never lies to me than someone like this. Jesus christ what a fucking creep.
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He lied to you because he wanted to see if you weren't superficial and would accept him no matter what kind of person he is. Tell him that you feel hurt and your trust in him is hurt and why. He should understand, if he doesn't that another story. The whole I want to marry you thing strikes me as odd but he may have realized how much he hurt.
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the inheritance part would be forgivable, but lying about what his job is is too much for me. christ, I mean, it's not even close. why'd he say warehouse packer and not electrician apprentice or something?
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Honestly though 3 years is quite a while to hold that back from someone.
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>>16413284
Does it matter?

He lied about his job but in the end he still lived like someone on that shit salary?

He came clean now so why not see what happens.
Say no to proposal and see if he changes at all. But he's trying to make it right now
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Do not be in a relationship with someone who doesn't value trust with their partner above all else. Leave him.
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>>16413294
it's highly abnormal to put a potential partner thorough a trial that lasts multiple fucking years.
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If you take him back after this, you have to realize that he will never value your trust the same way again.
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>>16413308
>he will never value your trust the same way again.
You mean not at all?
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>>16413284
>I feel like he just thought I had bad intentions for being with him and thought bad of me the whole time.
This is my biggest problem. He clearly kept it from you because he thought the worst of you.

Pretty shitty to be honest.
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His motivation for lying indicates a deep paranoid streak that is only going to get worse.
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He was just protecting his assets OP. I doubt it was personal, forgive him but not too easily. Make him explain himself and justify himself.
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That's like if a girl lies for three years that she had 30 previous sexual partners, or was a stripper/prostitute, just to see if you'd "truly accept and love her no matter what", and then reveal that she was actually a kissless virgin and proposes to you.

You know you'd GTFO because that's batshit crazy.
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>>16413288
It's not about the money. I don't care how much he makes, I don't care about how rich he is. I would have married him thinking he was poor. I care that he lied to me though and probably thought bad of me. It really hurts thinking he probably thought of me as some evil woman looking to steal his money. What can I really say to that? I feel like our whole relationship was always him having bad thoughts about me. That hurts..
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>>16413284
>Am I overreacting

no

>should I forgive him?

of course but forgiving somebody is not forgetting the b.s. they did and learning from that b.s.

>Am I just overthinking it?

no

>I have difficulty knowing he can lie to me for so long

he is a pathological liar - if he lied about such a huge issue for so long - then what else is he being dishonest about ?

>How can I marry him?

if you are suicidal

if you have any sense you will run like hell away from that total goofball - no telling what he will do when you get a clue and dump his lieing sorry ass
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>>16413326
>implying he can justify doing it for 3 goddamn years.
there should be steps between "I trust you to know I'm rich" and "let's get married" and those steps should be separated by significant amounts of time.

hey op, was he trying to buy you as a wife maybe? like, did he look at all confused you were mad?
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>>16413294
For 3 fucking years? The dude's insane.
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Oh this is stupid. It's literally a non-issue. You even say "maybe" at the end there confirming it.

Right now you're just in the "surprised" stage. It will go away as you realize he's still the same guy who loves you. He was probably shat on by a huge gold digger before. There's a reason people keep their wealth hidden: it's because they don't want it affecting their potential relationships with other people. If they flaunt it, then that's because they want the whole world to know.

Seriously, if he mistrusted you, then he wouldn't have ever revealed this to begin with. He trusts you completely now.

Enjoy the pleased reactions of your parents and the jealousy of your female friends when you let them know your level-headed boyfriend is loaded.

>you can tell who is male and female ITT
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>>16413346
Of course it's not about the money. It's about the character and value system of someone who would do this to another person. This is someone you really don't want to be with and I would even suggest he would benefit from professional therapy to solve this paranoia and possibly pathological lying. I just got out of a relationship with someone just like this. He broke down after I left and it all became real to him just how fucked up what he did to me was. He's now seeing a psychiatrist to try to change. He says he never wants to put anyone through what he put me through again. Your boyfriend may need a wakeup call that doing shit like this is severely fucked up.
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>>16413346
OP you sound like a genuinely good girl. I can understand you're hurt but I really don't think he thought you were evil. But at the same time he wanted to get to know you better before making that call. Did he wait a little long? Yes. Do I think it was malicious? No. I would forgive him, I don't think hes lying about anything else. He just wanted to make sure you were the girl he wants to be with forever.
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>>16413359

and if he has all that $$ then why is he living like total poorfag ?

something is wrong here
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>>16413284
Three years is a pretty long time time.
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>>16413375
It just shows how much effort he put into crafting and maintaining this lie.

This is some psychopathic shit.
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>>16413364
This.
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>>16413375
You don't stay rich by writing checks.
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He knowingly and purposefully lied and deceived you while you were completely open, honest, and trusting. In other words: you put yourself out there and took the risk on him, and he did not at all do the same for you. Relationships are supposed to about mutual trust and vulnerability.

Do not be with someone like this.
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>>16413375
Why not? I'm similar to him and live far below my means. It's all I really need to be comfy. I gain nothing by having a house or a mansion, I'm just 1 guy.
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>>16413284
>>16413298

As someone who is inheriting a lot of money, fuck off with your trust bullshit. With women initiating 70% of divorces and taking 50% (or more) of your assets in them, if you have a lot of money you have to be extremely careful with them.

OP, your boyfriend was just trying to protect himself from the skanks that are after him solely for his money. He trusted you enough to finally tell you he actually was loaded, something NOT EASY in this age of golddiggers, and you treat him like this? Awful.
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Lol.
Wait. So, for three years he pretended to be broke with a shit job? Meanwhile he's likely making six figures, has a degree, and could probably afford his own home, or at the very least, a beautiful apartment?

I read through all the comments in this thread, and I'm leaning more towards your boyfriend (or fiance, should you chose to accept his proposal), should definitely consider therapy, more than anything. I don't mean this offensively by any means. He wanted to know that you would love him poor or not. The crappy apartment thing, I really don't understand. I don't think it was necessary to keep up this nonsense for three years, but hey, perhaps he's not all bad.

Ask him to see a therapist, OP, and then consider his proposal.
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>>16413392
This.
He didnt want to take any risk and made some shitty, 3 year (!) trial for you.

Those anons who are saying it is because he is afraid of gold diggers dont understand what op is mad about at all.
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Your ENTIRE relationship was a giant shit test.

If you stay after this you are just proving to him you have no self-respect and I'm sure if you stayed with him he would have absolutely no qualms about lying to you again in the future. Get the fuck out.
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>>16413375
Why wouldn't he live like a poorfag? He just adds onto his wealth by living modestly.
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>>16413422
>The crappy apartment thing, I really don't understand.

Have you guys just never met a wealthy person who was happy and content to live below their means?

Shit, even my barber was a millionaire who drove a shitty 30 year old pickup. These people are often the ones who have it all figured out.

I know in this day and age you automatically expect a rich person to drive a Tesla and wear designer clothing, but come on.
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>>16413411
Inheritance is protected from divorce for the most part. So it's not like he was going to stop being rich even if she did take him for a ride.
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>>16413426
This.
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>>16413440
Hiding money is one thing, but he hid his job as well.

Who knows what else he hid from you to keep this charade up? I mean, have you met any of his friends?
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>>16413440
>>16413435

Okay. I understand living comfortably, my grandma had a ton of money when I was a kid, but even back then I didn't ask for much. So I can see making lots of money, living in an apartment, and not buying a lot of stuff.
The keywords here, though, are "crusty, broken down apartment", which is what's making me ask why. I mean even with an above min wage job, why not just buy a regular apartment, with enough space for two people, especially if he was planning to marry her?
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>>16413458
Who said he wasn't? He could have just been waiting to lock her in for marriage.
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>>16413364
totally agree. Though it wasn't three years I did the exact same thing as OP bf but didn't live in a total shit hole but did drive an old car. She was really angry at first but I could see it was because there had been times she listened when people tried to get her to break up believing I was going no where and I fooled them all. She was mad as hell for about 3 days then called me and asked me how much I was worth. She made an adjustment mighty quickly and OP will too.
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The dude is pretty damn smart for hiding his money.

Say whatever you want, but if OP leaves this man then someone else WILL pick up where she left off.
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>>16413472
>She was mad as hell for about 3 days then called me and asked me how much I was worth.
Just proves she actually is a gold digger.

In what backwards ass logic does getting shit all over and then crawling back once you learn you can get some cash if you stick around demonstrate any positive character trait about someone?
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>>16413473
Holy shit this double think.

>women shouldn't be gold diggers and its ok to lie to them but she would be stupid for not taking advantage of him because someone else will
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>>16413485
The man is protecting what's his.

If she is no longer interested in him then that just means it's another broad's turn to take a chance at becoming his wife. Rich guys get to make the decisions, no doublethink involved.
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>>16413284
If I had money, but was looking for a genuine relationship, then I'd probably play poor in order to weed out gold diggers.

I don't think it's a huge deal, but maybe it's something worth talking to him about.
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>>16413489
This.

If the man weren't running a screening process then he would have never been dating OP. He would have been dating someone with better tits and more respect - which is who he'll probably be dating after OP is out of the picture where she belongs.
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>>16413480
look, it doesn't matter if it is a man or woman when the reality of a lot of money sinks in your world changes even if you remain a spend thrift. Always in the back of your mind you know you are free. If my gf was willing to hang in there believing I was paycheck to paycheck she isn't a golddigger. Just a really fortunate bitch.
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>>16413284
I'd be worried about how much he's lied about considering he pretended to be poor for 3 years.
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>>16413284
I'll be honest.

I've done that to women in the past, it's crappy, but when some women ask how much you make and what your degrees are trying to brag about how you can support them financially it gets really annoying because they treat you like you are only worth your money. My wife was someone I finally came clean with because she loved me not for my money, nor my success or what I did or what lifestyle I chose, but what I am and she supported that. She got furious just like you, but I explained to her how I was treated in the past and eventually she forgave me for it and is happy now that I can take care of our kids.
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>OP is a genuinely good woman but still gets lied to and fucked around with
>Thinking this is okay and she should be grateful somehow
You're so worried about gold diggers but you yourselves are genuinely shitty people.
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>>16413489
you had better because it's the only way to determine if they want you for you and not what you could buy them
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>>16413496
Why don't you put a wig and fake tits and suck his dick?
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Don't listen to the retarded women in this thread OP. The guy is going to hide shit because in today's dating world, women are shallow cunts who are looking for guys with fat pay checks and who made something out of themselves to leech off of them.

The guy wanted someone who loved him and stuck by him through thick and thin. You see what your mom did and your friends did? Those are the type of women he wouldn't want to marry and date. It's easy to pretend you are in love with someone when you can leech their money and live in luxury with zero work.

And you know what? You should call out your mom and friends for being such fucking cunts and horrible people, because if they didn't exist, I can bet your boyfriend wouldn't hide his wealth or prestige from you.

Including in today's divorce courts? The woman takes half of his money, half of his possessions, and gets the kids, for doing nothing but fucking existing and sucking the guys dick.

So hes right to be paranoid and hide his life to find true love, because too many people are shacking up to get easy rides with no love, and after 20 years of a love-less relationship, it ends in divorce, fucking up your kid's lives and family, and a bunch of other garbage.

So trust him and try to have some empathy to see things his way. I know it's going to hurt to have him not trust you, but you should be more angry at the people that exist in this world that made your boyfriend act this way.
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>>16413505
This.
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>>16413489
Or date people with similar pay grades?
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Kek. Where are all the "it's all about money" fucks now.
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>>16413514
Yeah those unmarried young single millionaire women is a market ripe for the picking.

:^)
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He does not deserve you. He actually deserves a bitch that will fuck with him and is only around for his money. A liar just like him.
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>>16413505
The frog turned into a prince, and OP storms off because he was disguising himself as a frog.

If he were a prince in broad daylight, there would have been thirsty bitches all over him the past few years and OP would never have had a chance.

And now that she blew the prince's cover, that's exactly what will happen. Your mad is showing.
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>>16413505
but we don't know how many times in the last 3 years she was ready to dump him or did dump him or went on a "break" so she could date the guy with the nice car and apartment. She's not telling us that only that she is long suffering being with a poor man when she could have been living it up and eating at fine restaurants.
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>>16413509
>blame women

Gotcha.
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>>16413514
Money's not a big issue for me.

A good woman is a good woman regardless of if she's rich or poor.

I just don't want to be in a sugar daddy relationship.
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>>16413527
>I just don't want to be in a sugar daddy relationship.
You can do that without being completely deceitful about every aspect of your life.

Holy shit.
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Man lying about his money == woman lying about her partner count.
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>>16413522
I doubt he would marry her if that was the case anon.
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>>16413521
I think, if it was possible, if it wasn't frowned upon, we'd see many fedoras sucking Chad's dick.
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>>16413525
Yeah, blame women because we just had undeniable proof of their awful personalities.

"Why the fuck are you with that loser, go find someone with more money to take care of you! LOL!"

It's hard to write off what I just said when OP had literally that happen to her. Welcome to society cunt, get used to it because this is what the real world is like. But don't worry, women can lie about their past, their partner count, and everything else to make themselves look more respectable in the dating pool when trying to find the right man.

Because somehow it's unfair that a man whose respectable would reject the girl whose slept with 20+ different men in college. So they bitch about how they have to lie to even have a chance.
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>girl is with a poor guy who's actually rich and considers leaving when she finds out he lied to her
>still calling her a gold digger even though she was with him when he was a bum
You literally cannot win with men.
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Hey OP,

I got a hint for you:

/adv/ doesn't have your best interests at heart

it never does

these bitches aren't putting themselves in your shoes

they just want you to break up like they always do

every single time

rich guys don't have any trouble finding replacement women

so have fun hoarding cats as you grow old

I'll just be sitting here and enjoying the ambiance.
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>>16413548
Yeah if she was with him then she must have been cheating, clearly! She couldn't actually like him, impossible. Women are just robots with no soul.
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>>16413288
>>16413284
I'm interested in why you feel this way.

Not playing devils advocate or being a weirdo or anything, but I've inherited a great deal of money and I honestly don't want to touch it. I haven't told my girlfriend about it, and I've basically put it in the hands of a team of fantastic advisers and investors, and they've been making it grow ever since I got it.

I have not told my girlfriend, or anyone I know really, and it's not because I'm paranoid or think she's a gold digger, I just don't want to live like a rich person. I don't really give a shit about "protecting what's mine" because for me it doesn't feel like mine. I didn't earn it, I literally just woke up one day with a ton of money I'll likely never need. I don't need a new car or a bigger apartment, I don't need to eat out every night, I was pretty solidly middle class before this, and it just feels like I'd be adding a bunch of complications to my life that I don't really want or need.

It'll come in handy if I ever get cancer, or a family member gets hurt.
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>>16413284
OP the thread has run it's course since the latent homosexuals have turned up, it's up to you now to weigh are the pros and cons of this relationship and maybe talk to your actual friends about it.
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>>16413550
>don't listen to these people they don't have your best interests at heart
>but if you leave this guy you will definitely die alone even though you've proven you're a good person

top lel
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>>16413554
1st reply here
Not telling someone about your inheritance and actually lying about your job and leading an entire pretend life for THREE YEARS are not remotely comparable.
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>>16413521
The problem with this is that many women genuinely want to be with "frogs", and this guy just wasted three years of her life pretending to be someone she'd like.
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>>16413548
I myself would not call OP a gold digger.

She doesn't like that he hid his money? Cool, she can hang out with all the dudes who don't like how their girlfriends hid their 20+ exes. She's going to leave him over it? She can suit herself then, he'll probably just tour the world and marry a 10/10 perfect housewife with traditional values. I fail to see how the usual soggyknees dramathon actually matters.
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>If you leave him he'll just replace you and you'll die alone!
Men sure have an inflated ego. Women will never have trouble getting a man.
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>>16413567
Yeah, the fact that lied about his job for 3 whole years is fucking huge.
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>>16413548
I don't think she's a gold digger. I do think she'd be dumb to let go of Rich McFly over here for something that in the grand scheme doesn't matter.
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>>16413568
*A* man. This guy, on the other hand, will be able to get whatever the fuck he wants to replace OP. Maybe a Swedish girl, maybe Chinese, maybe both in the same hot tub. OP is going to be old and throwing tantrums because her dates all freak out the moment she mentions marriage to them.
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>>16413564
>leading an entire pretend life

I'm pretty sure he wasn't living a pretend life, he was living the lifestyle he wanted, which was a cheap life. Go figure people with money want to live and dress like they are poor sometimes.

The only thing he did was lie about his income and his job title. I'm sure hes going to keep living the same life he has now, and hes not going to move into a mansion or a well off home from this announcement.
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>>16413284
While this is actually very fucked up, he could just like to live frugally and wants to be with some one who also shares his life style, so he avoided telling you. He's clearly paranoid and odd, but you enjoyed him enough to defend him and stick by him for 3 years, I'm not saying forgive him immediately, but be open to it and let him know how fucked up and weird what he did was.
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ITT: feminists and their pet keks wonder why the rest of us aren't moved by their sob stories of rich boyfriends trying to protect themselves.
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>>16413567
So she should stay with him because he has money and can replace her? Even if you don't think she's a gold digger, you're certainly trying to make her one.
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>>16413564
Yeah, I'm not lying about my job and I've never lied about my degree, but I don't see why everyone in my life needs to know about my inheritance, as it's unlikely it'll ever affect them in any way unless my girlfriend and I get married (and even then I'll want to live like a pauper so maybe not).
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>>16413588
They think it no matter what. If it's not money, it's looks or status. They need whatever excuse they can grab.
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>"I hate gold diggers!"
>"OP you're stupid for leaving him, he's rich!"
Make up your minds.
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>>16413584
He was living the lifestyle that would make his elaborate lie more believable to OP. If he actually wanted to live in a shitty roach infested apartment and wear moldy sweatpants he could have done that without lying about his job or how much money he made and if OP wasn't down with that and actually was a gold digger she would have left when she realized she wasn't going to change his frugality or be able to take advantage of him. So the logical conclusion would be that it was indeed all part of the ruse.
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>>16413595
Nobody is saying that anyone needs to know about your inheritance so I don't even know where your problem is coming from. Maybe you're just fundamentally misunderstanding the problem people are having with OP's situation.
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>>16413588
She's not a gold digger, plain and simple.

She's just hosting the daily menstruation party in /adv/ because she found out a man had the nerve to protect himself.
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>>16413584
>The only thing he did was lie about his income and his job title.

And all the people connected to it. Come on, don't you have any close work friends?
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>>16413588
>Even if you don't think she's a gold digger, you're certainly trying to make her one.
This. You criticize women for being gold diggers but you're criticizing OP for not taking the money train.

Men don't know what they want.
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>>16413609
Therefore, man lying about income is equivalent to woman lying about sex life.
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>they weren't even living together

The intimate details of their finances are still at the "none of your business" stage.

OP could have secretly moonlighted as a blue crab farmer and it would change nothing.

>b-but she lied about being a crab farmer!
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>>16413598
Yeah anything to push the narrative that women are evil bitches.
>>
>>16413615
Why don't you suck my dick?
>>
OP's man did nothing wrong.

Fuck buddies aren't entitled to your tax documents.
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>>16413613

No, it's more like she shouldn't hold it against him for not telling her about his huge amount of money. No one is saying she should only stay with him for his money, but that it is more than perfectly understandable for a man to conceal his wealth until he feels comfortable revealing it. The fact that he did reveal to OP how rich he was is indicative of a huge level of trust for a man.
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>>16413346
>It's not about the money. I don't care how much he makes, I don't care about how rich he is. I would have married him thinking he was poor. I care that he lied to me though and probably thought bad of me.

Regarding the part you seem most worried about - the 'he was suspicious of me!' part - I'd like to assure you that probably wasn't the case, at least the way you're thinking. You can have no particular doubts about someone, even be confident in them, and STILL be unwilling to trust them with some stuff because of lopsided risk-reward ratios and/or passive paranoia. I don't think this is the behaviour of someone who thinks you're evil; I think this is the behaviour of someone who was almost certain you're good, but for whom almost wasn't quite good enough.

The 'he lied!' part, however, is exactly as messed-up as it seems. It's impossible for us to determine exactly how badly it reflects on him, since we don't know what the hell he was thinking during that time, but the range of possible interpretations goes from 'fucked up' to 'extremely fucked up'. You need more information, so I'd advise asking him for a complete explanation and not giving up until you have one (the way you tell it, he sounds like he was hoping you'd tease it out of him so he wouldn't have to take the initiative in explaining; this is of course shitty behaviour, but humans gonna human, especially under stress).

By the way, in the (extremely likely) event that his motivation is based in him or someone close to him having been screwed over by a stealth-golddigger, please keep in mind that this is an EXPLANATION for his behaviour, not an excuse.
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>>16413626
>but that it is more than perfectly understandable for a man to conceal his wealth until he feels comfortable revealing it.

Fucking this, thank you.

OP, if you think he committed a crime worse than murder then go find the fucking door.
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>>16413606
I don't have a problem. I was only commenting because like OP's boyfriend, I'm a guy who inherited a lot of money and I haven't told my girlfriend or any of my friends. According to a lot of people in this thread, that's grounds for breaking up.
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>>16413615
if a man says he's got more money than he really has then yes but not if he has money and protects himself
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>>16413636
OP is just butthurt she missed out on three entire years worth of chances to shake him down. Never let a woman know about everything you have.
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>>16413636
I'm not one. I'm with you protect yourself and live the lifestyle you choose. The absolute hardest thing about having money is learning how to keep it.
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>>16413642
Yeah even when a woman clearly isn't a gold digger, she's still a gold digger.
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>>16413601
This post has a whole lot of implying in there. Never has there been a woman with this problem of a rich boyfriend who refuses to spend money.

See that's the funny thing about gold diggers, they will live and date with someone who lives a cheap lifestyle, but then try to convince him to spend his wealth on her and to improve the quality of life. With a whole bunch of guilt tripping of "Well if you really love me, you would get me X, I hate living in this damp apartment, I want my own house." and all he would hear is a bunch of "I want this, and I want this, provide for meeee :("

No it wasn't a plan, he was living the life he wanted, because if he didn't want to live that life, he could have just been living a high quality life all along and say fuck it.


Women logic is disgusting "Ugh, no one wants to live like a poor person! This is all a ruse to trick them!"

>>16413609
>Come on, don't you have any close work friends?

Nope, it's work. I'm there to get my pay check and go home. I'm not a woman, I don't make fake friends with people at work and pretend we are close and all that dumb pointless shit. Need help and you aren't a douche? Sure, I'll lend a hand. Want to grab lunch and shoot the shit? Sure lets go, but this isn't shit I'm going to write home to my girlfriend about.
>>
>>16413284
your entire relationship was based on a lie. just because he came clean to you now, do you really think he wont do this to you again? dont proceed
>>
You guys take women too seriously. OP is just upset and doing what women do and be mad for a few days then they make up with you.
>>
>>16413661
Shit, this through and through. Sleep it off OP, then decide what you want the next day.

It's not a relationship destroyer. If he said the words "I have been fucking this chick from work for three years" then yeah that is destroyer-tier.

But him saying "hey I trust you completely now, so surprise I have $5 million dollars; let's go on an expensive vacation together" will only lead to good things.
>>
The question is: Do you love him? If yes, forgive him. If no, don't. If he wants to marry you then he wasn't thinking bad of you. He was just protecting his money.
>>
>>16413636
No it isn't.

You are either not reading what I and a lot of other people are saying or you can't understand it. But I'm done repeating myself. Good luck.
>>
>>16413649
>Women logic is disgusting "Ugh, no one wants to live like a poor person! This is all a ruse to trick them!"
I didn't say he didn't want to live like a poor person I'm saying if he genuinely did then there was no reason for him to lie about his job.

What's disgusting is your lack of reading comprehension.
>>
>>16413601
It's creepy when you put it this way. It makes sense, and it's fucking creepy.
>>
>>16413704
I think that was bait.
>>
>>16413706
I hope so but it was quite the wall of text to be bait. Who knows.
>>
>>16413704
There is a reason to lie you dunce. There are gold diggers who will shack up with rich people and try to convince them to spend their wealth when they live cheaply.

So this guy will get invested into a woman who pretends to love him, convince him to change his lifestyle and spend money for her, and she will give up after a few years and leave him.

Gold diggers will do anything to try to get their money, even live like a peasant for a few years to try to get it. Go figure!
>>
>>16413705
It doesn't make sense Anon. That's a shitpost. There's no way OP or any female here would have put up with a guy who lived in a roach infested apartment.

Their relationship wouldn't have reached the 3 year mark with some of the crazy assumptions made ITT.

The guy probably lived in an average one bedroom apartment that was close to his job or something. He felt no need for a condo in the upscale part of town because that wasn't his thing.
>>
>>16413711
You really want to suck rich cock don't you?

>Gold diggers will do anything to try to get their money, even live like a peasant for a few years to try to get it. Go figure!

OP did not know.
>>
>>16413723
>You really want to suck rich cock don't you?
Nigger what? I'm talking from experience. I came from a rich family, my grandfather re-married to a gold digger, and she put up with everything, even living a shitty home when he got cancer.

She wanted her millions and make sure my mother and I didn't see a cent of it. Gold diggers will kill, blackmail, abuse, threaten, hold them hostage, lie, cheat, manipulate, destroy families, and anything else to get their money.

What I speak is truth on what gold diggers are capable of, and willing to do to get money that they didn't have to work to earn.

You don't flaunt your wealth even when you live frugally, because people just look down on you for being a cheap asshole and not sharing your wealth since the wealthy clearly don't need it for their lifestyle.
>>
1. OP has every right to be upset.

2. Her boyfriend has every right to protect his money.

3. The fact their relationship lasted this long, he was honest about his wealth and he wants to marry her shows that you're all blowing smoke up your own asses if you think she's a bad person. OP was clearly a good girlfriend that earned his trust fair and square.

4. OP should be a more understanding about the circumstances but it's not unreasonable to be upset that your lover has lied to you for years.

I don't think anyone is wrong in this situation. He made a move that he had every right to do, and was probably the smart thing to do, but that move comes with risks. He deceived her for years, that's undeniable. But he was justified for doing so.

From an emotional standpoint though that's gotta be harsh for a girl.

Nobody is wrong, I think it's just something they talk about and move passed. I don't think you're overreacting OP but I don't think it's a reason to break up. You didn't say you wanted to break up so I assume you don't want to. Don't, just move forward. It's clear he loves you.
>>
>>16413284
Too lazy to read every post, but I may be in kind of similar situation as him. I don't know if this is why he did this, but being someone who has quite a lot of money from my family, I'm worried that if people know about it they'll try to befriend me, become interested in me just because of the money, so I try to hide the fact that I'm kind of wealthy, maybe he's feeling the same way? Still if it's been 3 years I get the way you feel and you shouldn't have to be going through this, but maybe hear what he has to say. Communication is the key after all
>>
>>16413338
Exactly. This is class A crazy behavior. I could see waiting a while to tell someone you have a nice inheritance/make good money, but not taking her on dates ever to check if she's a golddigger is just a dick move.
>>
Personally, I would not go back. I don't care for money, I never had much and I don't need much.. what I do care for is trust, and a respectful relationship, and lying for 3 years isn't conducive to either of those. I'd be worried about what other things he'd lie about in the future-- if he'd be one of those controlling husbands that keep their wives in the dark about everything instead of being open and honest about everything.

If you really love him, but are still hurt, just tell him that you can't marry him right now but you're willing to give him a chance. Then go back to dating him like normal and see what happens. Some couples counseling probably wouldn't hurt.

Good luck OP. I can't imagine how it would feel if someone I loved for so long dropped this kind of bomb on me, but I wish you and your boyfriend all the best and really hope that everything turns out ok.
>>
>>16413284
Chill op, he was trying to see if you loved him for himself and not his money. He wanted to make sure that you weren't gonna marry him, get money and fuck other dudes.

Granted he did keep his secret for a long time, but then again how long does it take to really get to know someone? A long fucking time.

This thread is full of autist and spooky scary skeleton scum
>>
>>16414358
>Granted he did keep his secret for a long time, but then again how long does it take to really get to know someone? A long fucking time.
The problem with this is that OP was completely open and honest with him while her boyfriend was pretending the whole time to be someone else-- so, does she really know him?
>>
>>16413284
Man goes out of his way to live like a poor man so he doesn't meet up with girls who only want him for his money
When woman finds out he has money she gets mad and considers leaving him
>>
>>16414387
I honestly think its worse he never took her on dates,rather than just not disclosing his money.

Even poorfags can save up,man. Like it seems like he didn't try to make her feel too special even within frugal means,and that's just sad.
>>
Is this copypasta? I swear I've read this story before.
>>
OP he probably just wanted to see if you actually loved him for the person he was, that you would love him no matter what his financial situation was and that you weren't just after his money. You have clearly proved this to be the case which is why he wants to marry you now.

It's hard obviously because you feel deceived and obviously you need to decide whether you can continue things with him or not, but honestly he doesn't sound like a bad guy. He wants to share his whole life and wealth with you now which is why he's asking you to marry him. He obviously had his reasons for doing this. But ultimately it's up to you whether you can live with this or not.
>>
Kinda glad to read it this way round rather than he was pretending to be rich then got given the boot when you discovered he wasn't.

But still, try to remember WHY you fell in love with him. It was nothing to do with his financial status (either way) so try not to let it matter.
>>
Nice Clannad image, OP!

In my opinion, you should stay with your boyfriend. I would forgive your boyfriend for lying. It's a white lie to me, and it's likely that your boyfriend didn't mean to hurt you all these years.
>>
>>16414582
Same Anon here.

Alan Watts copypasta

..."Money is a measure of wealth, and we invent money as we invent the Fahrenheit scale of temperature or the avoirdupois measure of weight… By contrast with money, true wealth is the sum of energy, technical intelligence, and raw materials."...

..."The greatest illusion of the abstract ego is that it can do anything to bring about radical improvement either in itself or in the world. This is as impossible, physically, as trying to lift yourself off the floor by your own bootstraps. Furthermore, the ego is (like money) a concept, a symbol, even a delusion — not a biological process or physical reality."...

TL:DR
We confuse money with wealth, we mistake the symbol for reality.
Money is a way of measuring wealth but is not wealth in itself.

So dumping your boyfriend now would be stupid. Don't do it because he hid how many 0's and 1's were in his bank account.
>>
The fact that he was living in a shitty apartment and dressed poorly, etc, suggests he wasn't lying only to you, OP. He was lying to everyone. He has issues beyond trust with you. He has issues with trusting everyone.
>>
>>16414711
>He was lying to everyone.
Because every wealthy person needs to announce he's wealthy.
>>
Forgive him for that shit. He's trying to cover his ass from gold diggers and find the one that loves him for who he is (you) and 3 years is reasonable. Relationships end because of not being able to pay for dates. So let this go. Be with him because he's defiantly worth it
>>
>>16414711
All the more reason to marry. He's giving his trust to you OP. For some people that's very hard to give. Take this opportunity to marry a guy who actually wants you
>>
>>16413284
>anime image

Yeah, this is bait and OP is a dude.
>>
He doesn’t want a gold digger, pretty smart of him. If you love him don’t worrry about it. Have in mind that tons of girls are bitches and he has probably been burnt before. Talk to him, discover if he is going keep being a cheap bastard and patch things up.
>>
>girl lies to guy
Whore slut die
>guy lies to girl
It's okay, he was just defending himself

The guy is an asshat. You seriously can't believe that was the first and only time he will lie to her.
>>
>>16415408
Fuck off roastie
>>
>>16415438
Go back to /r9k/, angry kissless virgin. Adults are talking here.
>>
>>16413354
Is anyone going to second this?


Just me? Ok.
>>
>>16415449
Sounds reasonable. Here's your (You).
>>
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>>16413615
Having lots of money = positive in women's opinion
Not having many sex partners = positive in men's opinion

Therefore...men that are poor = women that had many sex partners

How is this a bad thing if the man is actually rich af or a woman had few sex partners?
>>
>>16415337
It's a faggot tranny I believe.
>>
>>16413445
Nothing is protected if her lawyer is halfway decent. Divorce courts are always on the women's side
>>
>>16413284
I'm saying this as a guy, and if this is not a troll; tell him to go fuck himself. Cut all ties.
>>
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>>16413429
This!
Are you sure you actually have a boyfriend? Cause this is the longest/biggest shit test I have ever seen.
Thread posts: 148
Thread images: 9


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