/a/ you've now been designated by NERV as the pilot of the

Oh hell yeah, I get the cool EVA!

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>>158927200
yes, but I would call in sick a lot

Not fun desu, I'd do it out of necessity.

>>158927200
Does the EVA run on hard work and guts or do I need to learn math or some shit?
If I can just scream and kill the angels I'm down.

no thanks I like my mum as she is, alive.

>>158928326
it's controlled like a videogame and powered by your issues about daddy not loving you

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>>158927200
How about I just use an actual mecha instead

Fuck yes but with one condition:
Rig the media and turn me into a celebrity. I want my battles on tv and kids playing with toy evas.

>>158928551
> anon gets trashed into a eviserated and bloodied mess
> all on television

Yes because thats a sure way to get kids to play with a bleeding robot.

>>158927200
Do I get a tsundere co-worker? If so I will pilot a NERV until I have a nervous breakdown and ptsd.

>>158927200
No, I'd rather avoid responsibility and watch my anime backlist.

>>158928622
Then edgy teens instead

Knowing what I know now: no. They can get one of the twenty other eligible kids from my class.

>>158928622
Well they can just not play the fights live. Not like nerv would listen to their pilots anyway.

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Since pain and fuel are the only limits for eva pilots, why didn't nerv just fill them up with painkillers? Why didn't they invest in combat drugs knowing they'd be dealing with damaged kids?

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op here, and this is you commander /a/, looks like you have to share her apartment as room mates, dont screw it up

>>158928691
>Implying you couldn't take over the fucking world if you didnt know previously whats going to happen.

>Eat a s2 core
>disable the dummy plugs and rig it so no one can force you out
>Plan to kill gendo and seele
>Manipulate rei so she puts you in control of instrumentality, in case it happen
>Througly abuse asuka desperation for attention.

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>>158928846
I'd gladly be disemboweled by hideous bird-like abominations if it means I get to pork Misato.

>>158928471
Isn't Mazinger Zero like some sort of super evil?

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best girl coming thru, and faggots cant deny it

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>>158927200
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FckkZihQUaU

Are you fucking kidding me? Yes. Good christ yes. I mean I would take objection to the skin tight condom suits but would swallow my complaint once I saw my fellow female pilots.

What more could you ask for? If an Angel makes it way in the World is over. So there is no escape in just not fighting or thinking I'm safe on the other side of the globe. I would be directly responsible for my own safety and then the safety of my friends and family and the world. It would be a godamn honor to be selected as a pilot. Sure it can be scary and painful but it is all over if I fuck up so what good is it passing the buck to someone I cannot trust?

Plus the amount of ass I would pull down? I would legitimately have 20k+ children, I would be a world wide renown hero for my entire life. Every single person on the planet would owe me their lives.

The problem with Shinji is he is just too young. Give that faggot a few more years for puberty to hit full swing. Get him into lifting and guns. Fucking would have been ecstatic to pilot 01.

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>>158929169

Get the fuck out of here with your bullshit anon

>>158927200
sure and I will make my eva dance and embarrass Nervous at every turn.

>>158929619
nerv*

>>158927200
Looks like he has cones for ears.

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>>158927200
It has to be this version, but to be honest... I don't like my mom, and hate her. My dad left us but that's because my mom's a double timing whore and didn't take me because while they were separating he was heavily drinking and didn't trust himself with me.

Do you think my sob story gives Eva-04 the ability to go full on Cyborg Mecha Jesus like Eva-01 does in the N64 game?

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unit 4 was blown up so i'd just hang out with shinji and steal misato's panties

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>>158929544
Nice toilet you got there my man

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>>158927200
>got into Evangelion at the age of 14
>the worst possible time to get into it
>adolescence ruined
give me those years back anno

It'd be so fucking easy (comparatively) especially if you have EVA-04 and know everything that's going to happen.

-Don't let the US transport EVA-03 through the clouds to keep it from getting infected

-Don't let them install the S2 engine into 04

I don't know if you can do anything about Rei but at the least you'd have 4 Eva Pilots left instead of 2 for EoE shenanigans

-Actually aim for the MP EVA's cores during EoE

bam, you win maybe

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>>158934446
>Actually aim for the MP EVA's cores during EoE
You don't play, they don't play.

>>158934291
how did a cartoon ruin your adolescence

>>158927200
I'll say yes then let the angels destroy everything, they were far more sympathetic than humans anyway and just want the planet back which we wrongfully stole from them.

Can we do it like the rebuilds and ignore the whole "dead relative soul in the robot" thing? If we can, yes i would. I agree mostly with everything >>158929511 said.

>>158934952
Asuka was a terrible pilot and stared to the lance for 3 seconds instead of dodging. Plus you get to know its a lance and can steal one early on and use it at its highest capacity.