Cakes

>>143637344
Because of the idea that their misfortune was a result of them rejecting the advances of many potential suitors in the past back when they were younger, more attractive, and thought too highly of themselves. Something like that presumably.

Or it's just shadenfraude

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>>143637439
>Because of the idea that their misfortune was a result of them rejecting the advances of many potential suitors in the past back when they were younger, more attractive, and thought too highly of themselves. Something like that presumably.

Not Always. Let's not forget Densei of the 100 failed visits.

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>>143637650

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>>143637344

>>143637344
Can males be cakes or are they named something else?

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Why are they always drunk?
Why are they always alone?

Does Japan like seeing them suffer that much.

>>143638021
>Can males be cakes
Well, looking at the entirety of /a/, yes, it is possible

>>143638021
A man being single in his 20's is nothing special

>>143638185
the ratio is about 107 boys to 100 girls

>>143638021
>male
>cake

>>143638021
Those are called (You).

>>143637344
Because humans laugh and ridicule anyone failing at our literal only purpose in life, to breed and produce healthy offspring.
There is nothing more pathetic than a single woman past her fertile age.

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Every Christmas Cake has at least one personality flaw that prevents her from landing a man.
Remember what Chris Rock said: "Behind every beautiful woman is a man sick of her shit."

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>>143638355

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>>143637344
Tell me more about these "cakes" you speak of.

>>143638169
We mean cute cakes, anon. And I'm sure there's a few in the animeshpere.

Wouldn't that just be wizards, then?

>>143638185
I thought the age limit for guys was the same age for wizardry ascension.

>>143638076
NOOOOOOOOOOOO

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>>143637650
>>143637748
Is there a single sadder cake than her?

>>143639357
>>143639391
Wizardry and Cakes are not the same thing because men and women are different and have different goals in life.

Men can have perfectly fine children well into their old age so there's no rush for them to get married and settle down, instead they should focus on fucking as many women as possible while you're young and virile, so being a virgin who turns 30 represents a fundamental failure as a male.

Meanwhile women have a strict time limit on their reproductive capabilities and attractiveness. There goal in life is to find a man to take care of them and to pump out babies. This is most effective when the girl is young, still attractive and her eggs haven't deteriorated. So a female being unmarried and single at 25 means she has failed at finding a man while in her prime.

Of course the term "Christmas Cake" is pretty outdated, even in Japan and the age of average marriage has risen worldwide so I'd say that 30 is the modern day cutoff for women being "failures." Also note that Wizardry focuses on sex while Cakes focus on marriage. A man could be married and successful while 30 and still be a wizard if the marriage was sexless. While being a cake has nothing to do with being a virgin and is all about her getting that ring on her finger.

>>143637874
kek

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>>143637344
>you will never cure a woman's sexual frustration

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>create a girl this cute
>try to make me believe she isn't married at 27
Nice try, Japan

>>143641391
>Sucks at sex
>Vice grips men so hard they cum instantly
>It's the guy's fault because men are selfish

Is it just that no one ever told her that's not how you do it or what?

>>143641643
Vaginismus isn't voluntary, anon.

>>143640713
So what would be the dude equivalent, then? We already know we can get some delicious Ojisans out of old age like we can with cakes, but how can we combine this with marriage?

>>143638123
They get drunk because they are alone, and they are alone because they get drunk.

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>>143641940
is ojisan really the right word for that?

>>143638579
Then you find the ones with flaws you like
Are you a masochist? go for the Tsundere
You have an odepius complex? Yandere Onee-san for you
and etc

>>143641940
>but how can we combine this with marriage?
We don't because men and women are different. There's a reason why women grow up wanting to be brides and mothers while guys generally don't have those as immediate goals, they're more like things that happen at some point.

>>143638535
>literal only purpose in life
It's overpraised purpouse anyway. Right now humanity as a species can benefit more from people not focusing on reproduction.

>>143641391
>Series about a young guy relieving older women's sexual frustrations.
This is good shit despite the "complete virgin dude becomes a sex god after having sex once" cliche.

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>>143637344

I want to spend a pleasant evening cuddling up with Yomiko while we read and drink tea together

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best cake coming through

>>143637650
>Not satisfied unless he's an alpha delinquent.
Yeah she fits the mold here >>143637439.

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Will Chisato be the first cake to win in a good while?

>>143645112
That Not-Evagelion made by Bones, the Cake wins and the movie version has a sex scene

>>143645112
Didn't the cake win in Garo?

>>143645291
Rah Xephon is old as fuck dude.

>>143638535
>Because humans laugh and ridicule anyone failing at our literal only purpose in life

do you know where you are, friend?

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>>143642091
I-I'm sorry, what's this from? I haven't watched an animated hentai for like a year because they're mostly shit, so I'm out of the loop.

>>143645795
Like a cake.

>>143637874
Where is that from?
I would marry her.

>>143646800
>I would marry her.
wouldn't that just end up like that movie final destination, where going against fate just leads to the universe turning against you to correct this?

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>>143642985
Good taste /a/non, but that's MY cake!

>>143646952
Unless my fate was to go against the fate. Or at least try.

>>143645353
She popped the MC's cherry after his gf died. I don't know if they got together in the movie or not though. Seems like a good chance since he has to pass on his genes and has no one else.

>>143643468
good taste anon

>>143645291
>>143645795
is RahXephon any good besides the cake winning?

Is ReLIFE cake anime?

>>143646981

That's some fine taste yourself but we're going to have to settle this one way or another. Now that I think about it R.O.D had a bunch of Cakes if I recall, Yomika, Nenene, Maggie, Nancy, Wendy, Michelle, etc.

>>143637344
>>143638076
>>143638123
>>143638196
Holy shit i want to pump so much baby batter into these cakes.

>>143648716
>Is ReLIFE cake anime?
nope

it's vanilla shit with a fun premise that exceeds expectations momentarily.

MOMENTARILY.

>>143648903
But best girls are cakes.

>>143642091


Joshikousei no koshitsuki?

>>143637344
Because a NEET can always get a job and improve their fortunes. A cake is a loser bitch that exists to get consistently fucked over by guys because she never learns from her errors in judgment.

>>143648293
It's an Eva clone down to its absolute core. If you liked Eva, then probably.

Question: if a girls has been married before but got dumped because she's barren, can she still be considered a cake?

>>143649693
Returned Cake

>>143649693
Old and used

>>143649693

Would you eat a cake if you knew someone stuck their dick in it?

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>>143649693
depends,was her packaging opened or not?
not that I care either way

>>143649791
implying these implications

>>143649693
Divorcée

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>>143640241
This Christmas Cake is close.

>>143649791
Worked on a kitchen once, you wouldn't believe the shit people do the food of certain types of clients.

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>>143650001
>Oh 8man, I'm so clueless!
>I'd love to get married but I just don't know how to do it
>If only there was a handsome young man who would accept me and know how I feel about things
>You know, we've been talking a lot lately. It's almost like we're getting to know eachother as more than teacher and student
>Did I mention I'm single and desperate?

She's not sad, she's many steps into her keikaku. A decade from now she'll be close to 40 and have a hot piece of younger armcandy. Thirty years after that and her middle aged husband will be able to take care of her during retirement.

>>143651669
I'd be okay with it, sensei best girl

>>143651669

I really hope Yahari ends in the househusband route 8man dreams of.

What do you think being Sensei's cute, younger househusband would be like?

>>143651669
>>143652818
read the VN

>>143653127
>>143653187
>>143653250
>>143653301

Who is this? She seems to appear in many cake threads

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>>143651669
> She's not sad, she's many steps into her keikaku.
> mfw even if i knew about i would still follow her keikaku
Sensei best girl

>>143637344
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZIi5YZJqQI
Poor sensei

Why is the love between a younger, asocial man and a hard working older woman so perfect and pure?

>>143646202
Guys don't have that much of a biological clock though.

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>>143655206
>Why is the love between a younger, asocial man and a hard working older woman so perfect and pure?
http://www.swarthmore.edu/SocSci/bdorsey1/41docs/51-fra.html

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>Christmas cake actually won

And she got the best boy for her.

>>143657160
>8thly and Lastly They are so grateful!!
how could one man be so based?

Have you ever tried to woo a Cake in real life, if so how did it go?

>>143659443
>3DPD
>ever

>>143659505
He never said 3dpd

>>143659443
I live in burgerland, cute cakes don't exist here.

>>143646800
Phantom quest corps

>>143653319
I'd like to know as well. Especially with those fucking laser eyes.

Is that a cake thing?

>>143659178
Not following this. What's the details?

>>143640713
>Men can have perfectly fine children well into their old age
Does not follow logically into
>they should focus on fucking as many women as possible while you're young and virile

>>143661053
Cake principal got with another side character of similar age.

>>143657160
Based af

>>143657160
Holy shit. Fuck yes Ben.

What are times when a Cake has won, or at least gotten a good end?

So many of them go stale.

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Is a cake a cake if she has been bitten into many times but still has leftovers?

>>143637344
Romance where a cake wins?

>>143661970
Garden of Words. Kinda.

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>>143653319

An original character somebody made for his waifu. Her name is Miyaura Sanshio. I think he put her age as early 20s. But there are loli and high school versions as well.

>>143661953
No, that's called used goods.

>>143637344
Was Becky a virgin?

>>143637650
>>143637748
>>143659178
Did this get better? I couldnt read anymore after 60 because shit just got monotonous.

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>>143651669
Sensei knows what she's doing.

>>143659443
Cakes, no, but I did a used goods once.

>>143648774
More like Cake or Die

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>>143662563
I think anyone who isnt a wizard here did used goods.

>>143652818
It's pretty damn clever that 8man is presented with everything he wants from the get-go, but he's secretly too much of a wanabee riajuu to go through with eating the cake.

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Was Ayaka considered a cake?

Because she was great

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Would you work up the courage to tell sensei how you really feel about her?

>>143657160
Based fucking Ben, holy shit.

>reason 3 is simply "you can show them the pleasure of being cummed inside without having kids"

>>143657160
>5. Because in every Animal that walks upright, the Deficiency of the Fluids that fill the Muscles appears first in the highest Part: The Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement.

>the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever
>in the dark all Cats are grey
>every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement

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>>143662059
>An original character somebody made for his waifu. Her name is Miyaura Sanshio.

Wow, that's some dedication right there. Did he comission that drawing?

>>143663011
How old was Ben talking about? 30s? 40s?

>>143663427
Based on his implications of infertility, I'm going to guess menopausal age, whatever that would have been back then.

>>143663427
It seems he was talking about women at least entering menopause or in the beginning years of their inability to have kids.

That said, thanks to differences in nutrition, health-care, genetics, life-expectancy, and a number of other factors this may have been (and probably was) earlier than it is now.

So probably anywhere from mid-30s to sometime in the 40s

>>143662777
My bad, I didn't explained it right.
However I don't even know how to classify her with /a/ terms.

How should I call a woman who is in her 30's, has been married but didn't have kids? The only thing that comes in my mind is used goods.[/spolier]

>>143663753
As another anon said, "divorcee".

>>143663737
>women have essentially witchcrafted their way into being able to have kids until well beyond fuckability in appearance
The civil rights movement was a mistake.

>>143663753
If she was plowed, she's used goods anon.

>>143641391
Did the rest of this ever get released/translated?
OL's are the shit.

>>143663226

There are hundreds of pictures of her. I am pretty sure the guy draws them himself.

>>143663926
>The civil rights movement was a mistake.
You're preaching to the choir here anon

>>143637344
What is a cake, anon?

>>143664699
From Wikipedia:

>Cake is a form of sweet dessert that is typically baked. In its oldest forms, cakes were modifications of breads but now cover a wide range of preparations that can be simple or elaborate and share features with other desserts such as pastries, meringues, custards and pies.

Apparently it originates from the Old Norse word "kaka," for which it provides no definition.

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>>143664800
>kaka
Did someone say ka ka?

>500+ year old woman
>never married
Is Shinobu a cake?

>>143665059
>never married
Tell that to servant #1

>>143665449
>Tell that to servant #1
They weren't married, though, if my memory is correct.

She turned him into a vampire because he loved him, and not long afterwards he killed himself because he was an ungodly, immortal aberration.

>>143665544
sounds like marriage to me

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>>143645112
God Damn!

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>>143662874
Possibly, though I doubt human classification applies to her. She looks pretty classy regardless.

I still want to dick her cute little sister more though.

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>>143666061
The little one was cute, but Ayaka had
>that perma-bored expression
>that wonderful design
>that sexy voice

I want to lick Ayaka's armpits

>>143666061
>>143666235
I get the feeling she would be a great wife. More so than the other 2 cakes

>>143666407
Posts like this is why Nino cries herself to sleep every night

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>>143666407
She absolutely would
>Runs a business, so she doesn't need your money
>Not human, so she's not a bitch like human girls
>Laid back
>Knows how to take care of herself, and others

>she will never give you the best handjob of your life with those bored eyes and a slight smirk

Why live?

>>143666722
You're forgetting the most important thing, anon.

Why would she care or even want to marry you when she already has everything

>>143637439
Hello mr.friendzone

>>143666722
> the best handjob of your life with those bored eyes and a slight smirk
That boner came on strong. Would her expression even change after I make my mess?

>>143666822
>Why would she care or even want to marry you when she already has everything
Hot dickings. She can't give those to herself

>>143666916
A slightly larger smirk, followed by a sarcastic "ara ara" while she examines the mess covering her fingers.

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>>143667015
>>143666916

>>143667015
My filthy semen is not worthy of tainting her beautiful fingers

>>143661953
Yes, cake status has nothing to do with however many dicks she's taken.

>>143667015
How does she react when I implicate that it's her turn?

>>143661266
Because it's much easier to fuck women when you're young, attractive and horny than when you're 60 and can barely get your dick up.

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>>143667152
Certainly not

>>143662563
Cakes don't have to be virgins.

>>143666916
Normal hanjob or the nursing one?

>>143666061
The brown one on the back looks really adorable

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>>143667619

She is.