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Which of these faggots would you trust to bust your ghosts?

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Which of these faggots would you trust to bust your ghosts?
>>
Myself. I ain't fraid of no ghost.
>>
The one who isn't a piece of shit.
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>>115342944
>trust
None of them. Maybe Oshino.

Kaiki is best girl though.
>>
Aragi-san
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>>115342995
>>
Meme removed somebody's heart without them realizing he did it.
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>>115342944

All three of these people would be willing and probably interested to leave you at significant risk in the process of doing the job.

None of them are safe options. It's like playing a game of russian roulette where, before actually testing fate, you pick between three different revolvers as well.
>>
>>115342944
Meme
Dat fashion sense
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Why would I want that?

You got something against ghosts?
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>>115343433

Japanese ghosts are, as a rule, not chill at all. They're always murdering people.
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>>115343197
Bill Murray is a choice? Then I'll go with him!
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>>115343497

Bill Murray will just put your ghost in ghost jail. It'll get loose the first time the power goes out.
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>>115342944
None of them. Only pic related.
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>>115342944
Yozuru, she'd kill ghosts for free because she's nuts.

Oshino if I want to fuck the ghost afterwards.

Stay the fuck away from Kaiki. He'd take all my money and I'd end up in Siberia or some shit.
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>>115343326
Yeah but Kaiki's and Yozuru's revolvers have more bullets
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They're all jews so I'd rather deal with it.
>>
Kaiki-sama
>>
>>115343621
I'd say Kaiki's revolver is fully loaded
>>
>>115343621

Not even true.

Kaiki's revolver requires you pay to try it.

Yozuru's will leave you beat up no matter what.

Meme's will risk your life on the chance you're smart enough to learn a lesson from why you're playing.
>>
Unless you are Kanbaru or can somehow convince him it will benefit Kanbaru, you should never hire Kaiki.

Yozuru would either do it for free, or not do it all, depending on how much of a fight she could get out of the ghost.

As long as you have plenty of money, Oshino would probably be a the best choice.
>>
>>115343621
And at least Meme's will occasionally fire downrange.
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>>115343778
>You lose
>You lose
>You win but get sermoned after
>>
>>115343880

>implying any of us are smart enough to learn the lesson Meme would expect us to learn to save ourselves.
>>
Oshino has the most confirmed kills
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>>115342944
If the ghost is cute, Oshino.
Else probably Yozuru.
>>
oshino literally stole the heart of the highest level ghost and she didn't even know. so him
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>>115344461
To be fair, she was distracted and he definitely couldn't pull it off again.
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>>115342944
Gaen obviously because even if I'm manipulated to hell and back, I know that in the end everything will be daijoubu
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>>115344613
You know, unless she thinks you dying would help her schemes more than you being alive.
>>
>>115344792
To be fair, you're pretty much fucked no matter what you do but at least Gaen has the most connections and generally best knowledge of the situation. I'd pick Gaen
>>
>not picking araragi to save you then joining the harem
>>
To actually bust the ghost? Kagenui, since her version of solving problems is killing the apparition.
To solve my problems? Oshino.
To stop an apparition that is unbeatable and that Oshino can't stop? Kaiki.
>>
>>115345721
Kaiki is not more stonk than Oshino.
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>>115345721
Kaiki > Araragi in ghost busting but not Oshino
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Kaiki is the funniest of them all.

Plus he can dispose of an apparition effortlessly like with Nadeko. He wrecked her big time.
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>>115342944
Kagenui because I want everything dead.
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I'd risk my life to meet Kaiki in the flesh
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>>115343804
>As long as you have plenty of money, Oshino would probably be a the best choice.
And yet Oshino never actually took the money. It seems he only demanded payment to make Crab trust him, as she probably distrusts anyone who do anything for free. He just left town after the work is done.
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>>115346318
Pretty sure he got money for Senjougahara during the Monkey Arc since Senjou catches up to Araragi and hands him the money in an envelope. I would guess Kanbaru who is loaded would also have paid him for the help on her arm.
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>>115342944
Kaiki or Kagenui because I want to fuck them both.
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>>115342944
Kagenui Yozurunee-san obviously. Free doll and dead (as in overkill) ghost are great bonus.
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>>115346534
>fucking kagenui
Anon, she'd break you in half. Fucking Kaiki would either be wonderful or horrible.
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>>115346534
But they would be fucking you.

And not in the good way.
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>>115346703
>>115346715
These are all risks I'm willing to take.
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>>115346409
>Pretty sure he got money for Senjougahara during the Monkey Arc since Senjou catches up to Araragi and hands him the money in an envelope. I would guess Kanbaru who is loaded would also have paid him for the help on her arm.
Nope, Crab tried to give money to Oshino via Araragi but Oshino had left town by then. And that exact same amount of money was what she ended up offering Kaiki.
>>
All these deluded Kaikifags who don't realize Kaiki is incapable of solving the problem at the root and only delays actual healing.

Also, I like how Kaikifags make up bullshit about Kagenui.

As expected of fanfic writers.
>>
Easy choice. Kaiki is honest and kind.
>>
>>115346812
Had left town...Unless my memory is incorrect, Bakemonogatari is linear so it goes Crab > Snail > Monkey > Snake > Cat
He didn't leave town til Cat
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>>115346855
He's pretty capable of solving at the root.
Medusa and his job with Hitagi prove that.

He's just not going to do it to you but scam you out of all your money instead.

Unless you're Kanbaru.
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>>115346812
I'm 99% sure there's a scene where Araragi gives Oshino money, and he mentions something about how he was almost broke or something.
>>
>>115346992
Nope, Hitagi's problem was never solved which is why she she had her crab problem in highschool.

Nadeko never got a chance to confront her Snake like how Hanekawa confronted her Tiger and because of that, Nadeko has to sever her relationship with Araragi and Araragi can't meet her ever again or else the Snake is gonna come back again. Kaiki even tells Araragi this because Nadeko isn't truly cured and he knows it.
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>>115342944
Kagenui because Meme and Kaiki are shady fuckers.
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>>115347029
Yeah, episode 7, at about the 20 minute mark. Araragi hands Oshino the money from Crab and he happily takes it.
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>>115347152
Pretty much this.

Between the three main exorcists you have three ways of dealing with Oddities.

Yozuru physically removes them. Fuck your character development
Oshino basically tries to get you to better yourself and accept why the oddity is around so that both you and the oddity can leave peacefully
Kaiki just basically makes you think the oddity is a non-issue and gets you to basically ignore its existence
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>>115347314
But by ignoring its existence they cease to exist
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>>115347317
That's because you have good taste.
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>>115347384
Yup, but your mental problems aren't solved and they could come back if your problems get worse. Hence why Araragi was recommended to stay away from Nadeko.
Yeah the oddity might be gone, but her mental issues are still around. He's not Oshino
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>>115347400
She would solve anything in the blink of an eye
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What will they do against the oddities named "shitposters"
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>>115342944

Kaiki and Oshino are self-proclaimed hacks.

So Yozuru, the only real onmyouji.
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>>115347461
When you make Kaiki and Oshino your bitch, I think you deserve mad respect
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>>115347443
So does that mean Yozuru also solves nothing?
Or does she only deal with external oddities because she has the subtlety of a jackhammer?
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>>115347521
>Kaiki
"Ignore them and they will go away" or "lrn2hidethreads" or "go create your own chan"

>Yozuru
Dox them, kill them in real life

>Meme
Outpost them by spamming the board with good threads, posts, and contents
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>>115342944
Oshino is all talk, Kaiki is con artist and Kagenui literally solves problems with her own hands.


So Kagenui.
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>>115347443
For fucks sake, the guy is a ghost buster not a shrink
>>
>>115347589
She doesn't solve the mental issue but killing an oddity is a sure fire way to ensure that particular oddity won't be hanging around no more.

Whether oddities are a species so that you could have multiple Rainy Devils, Lost Cows etc is up for debate but I know Kiss-shot would be unique so I doubt Araragi would attract another Kiss-shot if Yozuru managed to waste her.

In short: She doesn't solve the mental issues but she goes remove the oddity so that you are no longer inflicted and won't be inflicted with that particular oddity again
>>
>>115342944
I'm not familiar with this series, but I'd go with whoever that bit of human perfection is on the far right.
>>
>>115347653
He's not even a ghostabusta. He's a scam artist parading around as one
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>>115347314
Kaiki's method is half assed because he only provides a temporary cure.

Only Yozuru and Oshino can provide permanent cures.

Nadeko's mental problems related to Araragi were never solved by Kaiki.

She can still catch another oddity or have the snake come back.

If she was cured then she could still hang out with Araragi but she is not cured.
>>
>>115347733
He's actually a ghostbusta pretending to be a con artist pretending to be a ghostbusta.
>>
>>115347614
Don't be a fucktard. Yozuru didn't dox shit.

Kaiki provided Tsukihi's info to Yozuru.

If anything, Kaiki is the one who doxed Tsukihi.
>>
>>115347813
He's actually a con-artist pretending to be a ghostabusta pretending to be a con-artist pretending to be a ghostabusta who says he doesn't believe in oddities but can obviously fucking see them
>>
I'd go for Kaiki on this one. If nothing else I can trust him to fix shit given enough dosh. Oshino would just say "I can't bust your ghosts, you must bust them yourself" or some other messiah shit. Seriously, why the fuck do you think I called you? And then there's Yozuru who is liable to bust the ghosts and everything else in my house, so pass on that. Kaiki is the only option.
>>
I want to go on vacation with Oshino.
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>>115347833
Mister Donut is not your raid board
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>>115347890
"I can't bust your ghost for you but I can lend you my help". There's a specific nuance in that. He's basically saying. "Yeah I could Judoflip your crab like a motherfucker but I think if I just take you through the ceremony you can come to your own conclusion"
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>>115347890
Oshino would at least give you something to bust the ghost with, he'd hand you a talisman or some shit and tell you what to do.

Kaiki would just scam you.
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>>115347903
But the Abandoned Cram School is /abandoned/
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>>115347686
But oddities are part of them half the time.
>no longer inflicted and won't be inflicted with that particular oddity again

More like afflicted with anything ever again.
>>
>>115347890
Kaiki won't fix your shit. Your oddity will still come back or another oddity will appear because you are still liable to give birth to oddities
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>>115348000
Nadeko got two specific oddities. Jagirinawa and Kuchinawa, you can be inflicted with more than one oddity. (even if you are a retard and self-inflicted the second one)

>>115347967
Shi- my bad
>>
>>115348095
I'm saying half the time she'll just straight up kill you.
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>>115347589
Yozuru is the only one who tells you Goodbye when she is leaving town and the only one who follows up on you even if you never asked her to go check up on you from time to time.

You will see, in later books, how helpful Yozuru is toward Araragi and that she even lends Touhou to Araragi and Araragi never begged for her to help him.

Yozuru just helps Araragi and she does it for free
>>
>>115348155
That's up for debate. She's got a 99% kill rate, please don't underestimate that.
If you're an oddity Yozuru is fighting, you're fucked. However the OP's question pretty much states the ghost isn't you so you'll be alright
>>
>>115348218
Right, that brings me back to my original post.
>>115343595
>>
Oshino

Fuck Kaiki and the other random slut.
>>
>>115348314
Indeed it does, well-played
>>
>>115348095
She technically self inflicted both
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>>115348407
Yeah but the first one is a freebie. Kuchinawa has no such excuse. She was even warned not to do it
>>
>>115348314
Well, Yozoru was born and bred to be an exorcist so what's wrong with offering her services for free since she doesn't care about money?

And besides you call her crazy? Yet you are the one currently suffering from an oddity in the first place which means you are actually the crazy one.

How is that for a mind opener?
>>
>>115348582
Yeah but still, If you got a girl that cursed herself with two ancient snake ghosts you don't let her go with just a warning, I'd be on her ass 24/7
>>
>>115348674
Like that other anon said.
If I was suffering form an oddity I would be crazy to go to her for help.

Id only do it if I know of an oddity and don't care about the people it's attached to.
>>
>>115348712
Hey man, the first is always free. You have to give people the benefit of the doubt if you want your harem. Otherwise yeah, I'd sorta just be like. "Yozuru, there's an immortal God at the shrine. You should totally deal to that"
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>>115348834
>Yozuru beating the living hell out of Nadeko
I'd pay to see that
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>>115348712
Would you be anon?

Would you really?
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>>115348880
Choking Nadeko with her own snakes for the irony
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>>115348937
I just masturbated and I still want to do stuff to Nadeko.
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>>115349118
She's the most sexually provocative Monogatari.
>>
>>115348834
>>115348880
>>115349001
Unlimited Rulebook is pretty hax. It was fast enough to temporarily escape from Kurayami.

Nadeko was strong because she was located in her shrine, the main source of her snake powers, and getting her away from the shrine would be too difficult.

I can see Touhou unlimited rulebook Nadeko away from the shrine which would help nerf her god abilities, making her easier to deal with by Yozuru.
>>
>>115348937
Yes, I'd even mindbreak her if necessary
>>
>>115349237
URB > Yozuru gets Yotsugi to make her fly > Yozuru catches up and grabs Nadeko by the face for the move she used against Araragi when she slammed him through the ground > Win
>>
Only one right answer
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>>115342944
Kaiki because I could actually email him. And text him dick pics.
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>>115342944
I'm going to have to see Meme and Yozuru in the shower before I make a decision.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nBkJ8kx0_pk
This thread needs some music
>>
>>115343479
Nah, they can also obsessively fall in love with you and want to fuck you while being soft
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>>115352040
Name 4 that do
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>>115343479
You don't know shit about ghost if you think like that. Japanese ghost are tame compare to my country.
>>
>>115348937
Wait I don't remember this. which episode?
>>
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Let's say you need to hunt a powerful vampire
>Drematurgie motivated by professionalism
>Episode motivated by revenge
>Guillotine Cutter motivated by faith
Which of these would you trust to have your back?
>>
>>115353383
Episode, he even helped in Owari 2
>>
>>115353383
Drematurgie probably.

>ever trusting guillotine cutter
>>
>>115352892
Thailand or Indonesia?
>>
>>115353557
You know the one.
Thread posts: 116
Thread images: 22


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