How the fuck do I rename a blendshape in Maya 2017??

Go into the Shape Editor window and rename it?

>>547858
better idea
make a nurbs face control
make attributes and name blendshapes in the controls attribute editor
use connection editor link shapes with control

>>547858
Your incompetent. I don't use Maya and I found the answer to your problem simply by searching for it on Google. Don't create unnecessary threads.