Hear ye, hear ye, I call to order another meeting of the Mage Guild. On the agenda for today: the Circle of Blue Magic is complaining that its current crop of monsters that know useful spells was irreversibly transformed into teenage k-pop singers again. Whoever is doing that, please stop, it's expensive to import creatures that know white wind.
It is the fell influence of the elemental plane of k pop that is twisting our reality in those places where reality falters.
We can either move the pens in which they keep their monsters, or alternatively start use monsters with no living essence to be twisted by this outlandish music.
If we could set up some kind of educational program i am sure we could teach some of my bone golems White Wind
In their defense however, it's not like they could have hired a bard.
You know they won't take a contract from any of us ever since the Department of Divinations started selling those paternity confirmation amulets.
Please do not use that word, only people of demonic nature may use it. You get to say PoD.
Please remember that since the plane of k-pop is officially regarded as a sub realm to one of the minor hells, k-pop singers are regarded as Infernal creatures and therefore need to be protected from discrimination.
As i have previously remarked we are in a serious need of more PoD in the guild and this is a great opportunity to currect that untill we have a membership of at least 50% PoD
Good riddance I say. Those stuck up Blue Mages and their ridiculous costumes are a blight upon this guild. I mean seriously, what kind of Mage wears Domino Masks?
Well I'm sure we have a spell for that somewhere. Just, dig through that rubbish bin -ah, I mean scroll containment device. Yes, definitely not the rubbish. No sirree.
Or I guess you could take some of the Bursar's pills. They do him a world of good, I take it.
Look, I know you get lonely away from your family, but those demonhosts arenust too thaumatutgically unstable. We do delicate experiments here,and the slightest-Willard, stop that, his horns are part of his skull, they don't dispell-
What was I saying? Ah yes, your Demonically Abled assistants are just too unstable, they'll mess up all the containment grids, and then we could have a repeat of last summer, a whole wing of the school, shifted 1/843 of a thaum away from reality.
I would like to pose to the council a question:
Are the elementals my school creates protected under the "Non-Humanoid Entities Protection Act"? Our research has been hampered by people attacking them in the field, and I would like to pursue legal action.
Don't know enough about that act to comment on the ones in the field but any employed by the school should receive protection under the "Near or Full Sapients Employment Rights Charter".
There's not doubt that they aren't already covered under than particular act. However, in the field I feel that the Non-Humanoid Entities Protection Act's clause about conjured familiars and other such creations to be stricken, so that our elementals--and I suppose Urr's skeletons, may be protected from harm while being used in field research.
Good point it's only right we ensure that our minions receive respect and protection in the field.
Though I must ask were they marked as bound and therefore protected, pretty sure there's a leniency clause for anyone killing what they thought was a rouge/wild magical creature.
Perhaps we could establish a sort of health plan for our minions, provided that a negligible portion of their paycheck/plunder/food rations are appropriated to pay for it and the personnel necessary to organize such a venture.
I think the Botanomancers were meant to be running an experiment this week. We're these creatures humanoid and/or sapient? If so then it's probably yet another skullache of a mess for ME to clean up.
On that note I would like to put forth the motion that we impose stricter penalties on the creation of unsanctioned sapient beings.
A REMINDER TO ALL:
OUR STRICT 'NO SUMMONING' POLICY IN THE BREAKROOM AND CAFETERIA IS IN PLACE FOR A REASON. OUR AIR FRESHENER BUDGET IS OUT OF CONTROL AND WE HAVE SOME EMPLOYEES THAT ARE ALLERGIC TO SULFUR. ALSO SOMEBODY HAS GONE SO FAR AS TO LEAVE ECTOPLASM ON THE FLOOR, RESULTING IN A MINOR LAWSUIT.
KEEP YOUR CONJURATIONS IN THE CONJURATION DEPT. ON FLOORS 3 AND 4 WHERE THEY BELONG
But what would be the minions advantages? What about say familiars would they be in need to pay the health plan themselfs of would their masters be the ones to pay it? Because the alchemist are creating a great amount of homunculus and most of them aren't exactly capable of making money.
Well i can't let them loose again can i? Old mandrake plants chasing students around. I have enough competion as it is...i mean... it isn't safe for our students...
Oh! So that's what they are? I wasn't informed about that. I was only informed about the sellling of the Matango crops that was found on the guild basement.
Surely we aren't asking that our employees pay entirely for their own healthcare. A small percentage, say 5% of their paycheck, would go into a community fund, where that collective 10% of the worker's paychecks would then be used as a sort of insurance to be doled out as necessary, provided they can prove that they have sustained an injury that merits use of the 20% pool. If the pool of 22% of their paychecks should be depleted, it will then fall to the employer to cover any costs, though, to provide an incentive to adopt the plan, we would provide a buffer of another small 25% of employee paychecks that will go directly to the employer should such an emergency arise. They can litigate in court if they are not covered by the original 30% plan or the buffer of 40%, provided that their business is conducted through the internal legal affairs department, which can be communally paid for with a small amount of 10% of all employees paychecks.
The employees will receive 100% of their pay
minus health insurance, buffers, and legal feesand the employer is not penalized for adopting the system. It's perfect. >>44894107
Have you considered a indictment for discriminatory practices spell?
These are ample terms and should cover any damages from the result of unenlightened peasants attacking our minions while we are undertaking important research. For instance, the other day my most promising student was experimenting with Lightning Elementals and their relation to water element spells, when some slack jawed Bard interrupted the process, resulting in a fire that burned half a farm.
Hey Turmil, i already sended the Allure seeds you asked for to your room. Can you guess, what will happend with your room, if you aren't there to retrieve then at the right time?
My department would be willing to provide Electromancers to help increase productivity and profitability from fishing, after all, we can just electrify the entire river and catch whatever floats to the top.
I already took care of that gift of yours, thank you. Maybe now I can do something about all those Sylkies that keep stuffing their noses into my private research.
That THIS guy convinced was a good idea >>44899954
Not at the moment, though could you ensure that the kitchen sends some refreshments I seem to remember that the less necromantically enabled still have need of such things.
I for one agree with the blue mages for once.
These hit and run k-pop transformations have gone on for too damn long!
Sorry for ditching out of the archives earlier people