/cpd/ - CHICAGO PD SCANNER THREAD - MEMORIAL DAY GRILLPOCALYPSE

>The prisoner doesn't fit in the back of the car. He's pretty big.
>Female hispanic with missing teeth and a huge bleeding gash on her forehead is walking towards the bridge.
>Male Black is beating Female Black in the alley
>Neighbors are disturbing the peas and rock concert at the church

Should I cross Chicago off my places to visit in US list?

Right now it's NYC, Chicago,Nashville, Orlando

>>127486005
Take off orlando too.

>>127485193
>memorial day grillocalypse in the hood
Excellent title, always a quality thread. Thanks OP and thank you Robert!

>>127486005
Just stick with NYC and Nashville anon. We want you to get back to Aruba without the accompanying body bag

>>127486005
I'd keep Chicago it's really segregated and the areas you'll be in are cool.
Drop Orlando.

I've never been to the US but I would really like to visit Chicago now. I'm aware of the risk but I trust my italian weaseling abilities to keep me safe.

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>>127487062
Unless you're skin is certifiably darker than 30% milk chocolate bar, I suggest you avoid the red parts

Chicago, IL, USA Sunday 3:00 PM
Partly Cloudy 18 °C

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>3 mohammeds and a mohammed-ette fighing in the street

>>127486005
Change Orlando to Gainesville, FL. Much better and a quality Florida experience. Please spend lots and lots of money and don't forget to have a good time in the Sunshine State.

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doing pretty good right off the bat

>male down on the ground at dunkin donuts

whose got the location bingo card?

>>127487312
I'm going to put some burnt cork in my face and I'm going to pay some black guy to pretend to be my friend. Everything is going to be fine.

>>127488409
If you really want to go to the hood, bring a camera and make some fake business cards and pretend you're filming for the news or a movie. American gangbangers LOVE flaunting their money and drugs for the cameras. Unlike in yurop, where gangs of young males instantly attack cameras and hide their faces, chicago nigs do the exact opposite. Just watch any documentary about gang violence, they really love the attention and will flock to you and probably not kill you

Male Black is being chased by 2 Male White after he stole their laptop.

Fuck shills, comfy bumb for Robert, Adam, Charlie and all the heroes we need.

>>127488942
Male black is gonna win that race

holy shit cremeted human remains!

>>127488880
Bingo.

>>127489631
If you listen in the morning they do the body removals from the night before. The service needs to know if the body is bloated or decomposed.

>>127490211
>If you listen in the morning they do the body removals from the night before
I normally only listen in the evening, so you hear some calls for the body snatchers, didn't know they removals peaked in the morning.

LUNCH IS OVER ADAMS, BACK TO TRAFFIC DUTY

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hold back the night Roberts

Oh shit did I just hear cranky?!

for foreign anons wondering about how our nigs act in front of cameras:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4yhVU1fU3c

>inb4 vice

this whole series is pretty great actually

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmvHFCYQaLg

We got a drowning!

No shirt Male Hispanic tried to hit him with a golf club.

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getting there

Good afternoon Roberts. Working a double today and getting in my comfy spot quick with this feed.

>>check yo keys, check yo partna's keys

Save /cpd/

Did anyone find a memorial day weekend cards from last year? I have the 4th of July card but not the memorial day card.

Thanks for the bread, OP.

>CHECK YOUR KEYS, UNITS!

so close to bingo!

Drop off kids, to get arrested

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>>127502184

auto theft in progress

>DOA in the tub
bloated?

>DOA
DOA
>DOA
DOA
>DOA
DOA
>DOA
DOA
>DOA
DOA
>DOA
DOA
>DOA
DOA

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>>127485193
By golly, Robert, that was some awesome timing. Nice job.

I'm gonna bump a bit, since the thread is already sliding.

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So, Male Black hasn't killed in two days so far?

>>127503390
Wouldn't be so sure. We had two body removals yesterday, one this morning, and a DOA just now. And I haven't even been listnening for that long that last two days.

>Youths breaking windows.

>dispatch telling officer to call his mother
HAHAHAHAHA

Call your mother Robert

check yo keys cubs

>>127486005
>live in tropical paradise
>wants to visit nigger-infested American cities
what the fuck is wrong with you?

>>127503937
>Listening to cubs with the open key
Robert seems to be relaxed, his real hours are yet to come.

BTW, anyone has any further details on fighting throngs of male blacks last night? There were reports of like 100 head crowds.

A prostitute and her employer?

>>127504435
either a customer or her pimp?

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Blessed be your name, Robert.

>>127504619
I think dispatch meant her pimp. Now that I think about they also say "differently able" and "mentally challenged", "Male Black"... So I guess that's the politically correct way to call a ho and pimp.

>>127504847
so basically they are on every corner? the cat can't watch the mice all the time.

>>127504847
That explains the low chimpout rate of this week but it's not over yet.

>>127505063
That's the only immediate measure they can take, really. What else?

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>Lost and confused

>Good afternoon, how are you doing
>I'm great

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c'moooon bored dispatch

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Sliding.

Wow Dunkin Donuts has been the place to be this Memorial Day weekend.

>>127505666
KEK is pleased.

FOOT CHASE!

Two people beating each other in the parking lot while a crowd is gathering to watch.

>riding a bicycle with no pants on

Male Hispanic is riding a bike without pants on.

Several Male Blacks throwing rocks at people.

>>127486005

Nah, it's a nice place to visit. You're way more likely to run into crime in Europe than in Chicago.

>pavement inspector

>pitbulls running loose in the alley

Have a bump

>You giving him the option??
>I was just being nice about it

Calm evening in Chiraq so far.

>>127509654
They're cheating. See: >>127504847

>>127509654
the night is young

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>>127509867
Both are my posts, Italy.

Did they just say "male hispanic in a dress"?

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>>127510073
Yes they did. Wonder if it was one of the ones who rolled El Chibo a few weeks back.

>>127510070
Oh. Good for you.
>>127510073
I heard that too.

What is today's body count up to?

>>127485193
Thanks

>caller's dog dragged a small bag of something into the apartment
>she thinks it's drugs

>Dog dragged a small bag into apartment, owner thinks it's drugs

>>127510335
Ha I remember El Chibo.

>>127510422
1 DOA, body removals, but that's just on CPD, who knows the craziness going on in the encrypted channels and other feeds

>>127511072
>>127511096
"GOOD BOY"

>>127511153
Thanks

>Male black trying to get things with counterfeit money

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Just got in - good evening Roberts. Keys checked.

>>127487846
location edition

>Male Black with a knife and caller said he heard a Taser

>Dispute with a manager at Chuck E. Cheese
>Caller's hair got stuck in a machine
>Manager was laughing at that

>>127513241
Ah AH AH

>Barbecue for the officers
Robert's having a good night.

Fucking up the BBQ Robert!

>>127511558
Thanks, Robert

>manager laughs at lady whose hair stuck in machine
kek

>car on fire

>bf and ex-gf trying to fight at Wendy's in playground

>>127515337
>someone else won't delete the video of the fight

>at least 100mph
zooooooommm

>>127515631
Where is the pole?

>>127486005

There is no reason to visit Chicago. Wife and I drive in for concerts and for Rich's deli.

>beat up a two year old baby, baby is having trouble breathing

>Domestic abuse, beating 2 y/o

>beat up babby
fucking animals

>>127487062
Just stay in little Italy by UIC, it's dope especially in the summer. Avoid 26th St and Pilsen. Also the 90s and 100s

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>>127516637
>The parents.png

>>127516869
What about the area around UC med school? Probably will work there for a couple of years, curious what to expect.

It's Ramadan today it's a holiday

kids are climbing on the school roof

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new one...
Memorial edition II

>>127517899
They must be planning on celebrating with the traditional defenestration of a gay man.

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>EIGHT
>EIGHT SHOTS FIRED
>AH AH AH

>>127517899
They do that 3 times per week. It must be like climbing trees.

>registered sex offender

>amber lamps on scene

>kid in the alley appears to have been beaten badly

>>127519501
>kid in the alley appears to have been beaten badly

Only 8:42PM just wait for RRH.

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This guy is riding around Chicago with a Periscope up. Sometimes he does Scanner broadcasts. I bet if we asked nicely he would give us a scanner ride.

>>127519894
>inevitably gets car jacked/robbed because no one that owns a gun uses fucking periscope
>live steam of what dindu's do after they steal a car, Like bait car but the police aren't around
>see shootings and police chases in real time

Not a bad idea

>heavy set
>wearing skinny jeans


gross

>heavyset...wearing skinny bluejeans

wut?

>>127517387
If you work at rush or any hospital here? Gang related injury's like stabbings gun wounds and anything in-between. Especially in the summer.

>Gangmembers gathering around the school, shooting in the air

>>127520398
Thanks. Any comment on that neighborhood?

>missing male Hispanic

But is he really?

>man laid out on the sidewalk

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Who else /openkey/ here?

Chicago looks scary as fuck.

I wouldn't drive around at night even with a CCW

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54WBjkwRug0

>>127520893
he finally went back

>>127520850
Can't say for sure because I live in the heart of Chicago, but it's by the highway and a lot of black congregate by the train stop. Also two police stations are near

>concerned dispatch
>let us know, we don't want anything to happen to you.

>>127521225
With a little bitch attitude like that, I don't blame you.

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>>127516637

>>127521502
Reload your stream, Robert, we don't want you to lag behind.

>gunshots heard at the cemetary

Please need the phone number...

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holla if u got them extended clips nigga

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>>127521626
>gunshots heard at the cemetary

>fireworks

>>127521942
someone please robertify this

You better find another place to hide quick Davante

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evening Roberts

>boyfriend deante beat her up and her 40yo aunt
>then his two friends hit her


kek'd

burn the coal, pay the toll

>beat up the girlfriend
>beat up 4 year old baby
>then proceeded to beat up her two friends

lol

>over one hundred miles an hour

>>127521537
Come or don't I don't care I've lived here all my life and it's not as bad as gangland or anyone makes it seem

The other night an anon was talking about an IRL guided bus tour of the worst of Chiraq. It was deemed a bad business model for many reasons.

What about a virtual tour via Periscope on a motorcycle? What if an anon had a Patreon or a PayPal and was willing to chase radio calls all night for the amusement and entertainment of other anons? Would anyone here pay for that?

>>127522404
The only thing we would be paying for is anons funeral...

Why are niggers so violent?

They will rob, rape, carjack, burn down buildings. Seemingly daily with no remorse or second thought

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>>127522331

Really though. It's nice to listen to the scanner and talk about the crime and all that's happening in the city, but realistically, the crime rate is way better than a lot of well-known cities, and only a little worse than that of Indianapolis.

It's just a big city.

>>127522404
I'd be down but I'd only do local spots. Like 26th St and Pilsen

>dad is fighting mom
>he has a knife

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>>127522519

>>127522404

Lol rolling around the ghetto on a motorcycle filming people is some dumb shit.

And the city is big. One person can't get to all the calls. It takes a while to get around.

>>127522552
I remember when I was little hearing the stories of people being shot outside the house and around the block

>>127522573
>I'd be down
to do the Periscope or the Patreon.
>paying viewer or broadcaster?

don't be stealing my business model !

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>>127522725

It happens. A lot of things happen in a city the size of Chicago. Someone has probably broken into your apartment. Someone has probably been murdered on a street you walk down every day.

Chicago has a been a big deal for a long time.

And yes, it has a violent crime problem. Ideally, it'd be less severe. But it isn't like people don't live totally normal, comfortable lives there.

>>127522552
It's literally just like 4 blocks that have 90% of the crime in Chicago isn't it? I was last there in 2001 and I loved the city from a tourist prospective. I guess the authorities are afraid of a crack down in the 4 blocks just dispersing the crime throughout the city.

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>>127505666

>>127522894
Rider, but can only do it on Wednesday to Friday. Then after my work schedule changed I can do weekends

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>>127505666
check'd

>>127522696
True. Never lived in Chicago but transited through O'Hare quite a bit. The city is humongous in area from the air

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>>127523100
Does he go to grab the dick then change his mind?

>>127523303
That is indeed what he's doing.

wheres the Indian dude who dispatch can never understand

>>127523303
yes! I've seen that before but I can't remember where. I think that is a goPro on the dick

>>127523042

There's a set of neighborhoods that are problematic. I'd say it's a little more than 4 blocks.

Stay North of Roosevelt, and you'll be fine. One of the advantages is that all the crime has been shoved down into the South.

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Is it time already? Get comfy!

>five shots
?kids crying

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>>127510335
>>127511153
Why does Chicago have such a large Puerto Rican community? Isn't it just because of "second city" status attracting immigrants? Seems weird to move from a tropical island to a freezing lakeside.

>>127523688
>And time is 2127

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>>127503390
It dont update till the end of the weekend.

GENTLEMEN!! How the hell are ya?

>32 foot boat went into the breakwater at full speed

>32 ft. boat slammed breakwall at full speed

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>FOURTEEN
>FOURTEEN SHOTS FIRED
>AH AH AH

Boat went full speed into the wall?!

>>127523791
Because Hispanics are taking over Chicago NYC and California. Once we own those cities everything falls into place

Whose working tonight and tomorrow?
I'm pulling a ten hour shift at rp x 1.5

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>>127524142
Breakwall.

>>127524359
F

Robert bless these digits

>>127524359
Someone's getting fired

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>>127523961
doing just fine - how're you holding up tonight?

>>127524007
>>127524082

post footage!

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aesthetic robert

Drugs in th3 trash n7gger conformed

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>>127524504
more

>>127524485
full of good food, about to start the third chapter of VA-11 HALL-A. Comfy as fuck.

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>>127524601
crook county, illinois

>>127524628
is it worth a buy?

I lik3 to get stoned anc listen to real roberthour mwx comfy

>kids throwing fireworks at each other

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>>127524711
My last art for tonight.

thanks for using my dawg, OP.

>stupid woman cop can't figure out which channel to use

Strange looking kitchen huh?

Check your keys

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>kids are lighting fireworks and throwing them on each other
every time

You're all thinking too much. I enjoy how bizarre the crime in Chicago is.

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>>127524711
Ayyy y'all saved my original pics yoo

>lighting fireworks and throwing them at each other

someone post nogwarts.webm

>>127501255
We didn't exist then. July 4th is the one year anniversary

Male white

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>>127524711
>>127524941

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>>127524730
Depends on what you're looking for, m8. If mixing drinks for cyberpunk waifus to a dope-ass synth OST in a VN sounds entertaining, then, yes.

ALL UNITS TO THE CARNIVAL, A PERSON WHO ACTUAL MATTERS TO SOCIETY GOT ROBBED BY SOME SPOOKS.

>Man, bleeding from nose and mouth, is following his offenders

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>>127524628
good to hear - /comfy/ on this end too

>>127525077
The absolute mad man

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>>127524911
I live in Indiana, about 30 miles South East of Chicago. Fireworks are legal here and this is a common sight around the 4th of July. Not necessarily nigs, but kids running around with fireworks of sorts. Hearing the pops and crackles in the night is comfy for me.

Drive 30 miles West into Illinois and into Chicago, all types of fireworks are banned. No fun. No 'MURCA.

>>127524991
see
>>127524911

>You're a nigger, Harryveus Jermaine.

Robert the nigger hunter

150 freedom

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>tagging the walls

>>127525325
>get robbed of leaf money
>nigger tries to take it to the crack dealer
>gets kicked out of the crack house
>shiiieeeet

921 robert get your shit together

Shit wife snapp3d

>>127523791

Jobs and other Puerto Ricans, in that order.

>>127524911

Looks dope.

>suicide by butcher knife!

>Suicide threat
>Nicole says she had enough of her marriage, had enough of her life

Evening Roberts. I'm waiting for a bus and so far I'm heard 4 2" fireworks mortars, 7 shots, possibly 9mm, and 3 sirens. All within the past 5 minutes. The dindus are out tonight.

>tow damage

LEL

>>127524911
That does look really fun though

>>127525711
Periscope that shit!

>>127525707
She is probably cheating.

Chiraq is popping tonight

>two black males fornicating in the alley


wew lad

>>127525784
As long as that projectile doesn't hit you in the face.

>>127525951
Or paying the toll, who knows.

>>127525985
No work tomorrow

>>127525711
oh shit! PicRobert! stay safe in da hood Robert

>>127526082
>male black
>work

>>127526134
>pick one and only one

>three male blacks robbed and raped him
>refused EMS

O shit bank holiday lads. Its gonna getwild

>caller says three male blacks robbed and raped them
fucking savages

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>>127525711
Welcome back, lad.

>>127525906
It would just be distant sounds. The fireworks, dull thumps, and the shots were about a mile away, might sound like I'm dropping rocks. Not work it.

>Two males blacks robbed and raped "him"
Yup, they're out there.

Did they just report rape and EMS refused to response? Kek.

>3 male blacks robbed and raped them
did I get that right? was there anything else?

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>>127526134
Good point

>AY NIGGA AY

>SSUP WIT DAT WALLET

>*SMACKS LIPS*

>SUP WIT DAT AYYYUUSS TOO?

>>127526299
dispatch said "EMS refused" then trailed off, so I don't know if he meant EMS wasn't going in, or if the victim refused EMS

>>127526117
I generally am. I know when to leave and when to drop.
>>127526258
/Comfy/ to be back.

>>127526447
"EMS Refused" means the individual did not want to be serviced by EMS.

Tfw when gf will never understand my love of real robert hours

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>>127526560
>tfw no gf

Should we start a new thread for Real Robert Hours?

>dispatch declares they are done and going home
guess it's been a extra shitty shift when dispatch can't wait to bail

>>127526560

>gf

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>>127526560
Show her our dank OC, niqqamane.

She will not approve of my mongolian handed scult9ing message board

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>>127526560
She can hear it from the kitchen?

We love real robert hours

Real robert hours is our school past time here in Japan

I want to visit Chicago and see robert fight male black. I practice my english for day when can ride in cpd car and arrest male black!

Japan we love you real robert hours!!!

>>127526299
I would leave my wife if she got rapped by a dindu

Coal burning slut

HOW YOU DOIN
>HOW YOU DOIN
HOW YOU DOIN
>HOW YOU DOIN
HOW YOU DOIN
>HOW YOU DOIN
HOW YOU DOIN
>HOW YOU DOIN

>baby daddy choked her
>threatened to shoot her

>GOOD MORNING

>>127526910
Rape isn't exactly voluntary
I'd be glad they didn't kill her

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>>127526905

>>127527129
>thinking that tainted goods are still usable goods

would you eat food that had mold growing on it? just scrape off the mold, right?

fucking bong

so im a newfag to /cpd/, could someone give me the rundown on robert dog? i usually see the threads themed after him

limo blocking lanes and not moving
>oh, they need some encouragement

Check yo keys!

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>>127527313

>>127527313
nvm i just read the first line of the thread

>>127526905
>There is probably Nipponese Robert merch
>Robert bobbleheads
>Robert garage kit figurines
>A Robert otaku fanzine
I WANT A SASSY DAKI YOU SLANT SONABITCHES.

>>127527129
>not honor killing her yourself for being a coal burning whore and losing all your debit and credit cards


low test beta

>>127527215
quit ruining the comfy faggot..
also.
check yo keys

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>>127526560
Tfw when the waifu curls up next to me,and gets comfy waiting for Real Robert hours

>>127527365
oh, so he isn't an actual person? thats kinda upsetting

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>>127527481
Robert is the Furniture of Law Enforcement. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

>>127527215
>Thinking I could get another wife to look after our kid
Not gonna happen and it's not as if I'm asking to be cucked burger

>>127527481
Robert is real, he is chiraqs hero against male black!

>>127527661
>having a kid with someone easily susceptible to rape

as expected, degenerate

>Shots heard in Norwood.

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Shots fired here.

>loud bangs are just fireworks

just robert my shit up

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Couple bits of OC tonight.

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Forced entry here.

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>>127528089
Peice of shit... This one should be straight.

>>127528141
Oh man, I bet they have good stuff. First house I'd pick to B&E.

>>127528173
heh.

>>127528173
Gotta break my neck a 2nd time now.

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Male blacks blocking this intersection playing loud music.

>>127522123
Ah ha ha, hey Count

Would you negros mind turning that jungle mind control system down?

>>127528089
>>127528173
Fuckers... They're vertical in the previews... Fucking phone.

White man with a gun impersonating an officer?
This isn't Seattle, dammit!

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Male white driving a blue car waving a gun here.

>Male white, in the car, showing gun to people, possibly impersonating an officer.

Ok, who's LARPing?

>Victim name of Kiwanis
like...The Kiwanis Club?

>>127528251
made me laugh harder than i shouldve

She says "officer" with a certain care - reminds me of and elephant picking up a pea

>>127528481
proly /k/

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>>127528481
>>127528469
>>127528435
HE CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT!!

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7 shots fired in front of this school. Happening?

>>127528582
explain to me what the check your keys meme is

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>>127528612

700 shots is a happening. And 20 % some form of artillery. IE can't be 50 cal

>>127528657
Someone has transmission button pressed on.

>>127528657
It's Police for "hot mic" which is military for "stop sitting on the radio causing the transmit key to depress and jam the channel you fatass!"

>>127528780
>>127528784

lmao, thats hilarious, how often do they say it? i really want to hear it now

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>>127528657
sometimes a radio mic key will get stuck , check yo keys is dispatch telling everyone to check their keys

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Man and woman fighting here.

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>>127528888
CHECKED. How often? Nightly. Some nights, often. It wouldn't be a meme here if it didn't.

>>127528905
Sounds like they're still on an old analog system so their HT radios are probably pretty fucking ancient requiring frequent "key replacement".

sheeeeeet, missing alkie

>>127528784
>which is military for "stop sitting on the radio causing the transmit key to depress and jam the channel you fatass!"
or someone flipped the connectors on the spaghetti cable when they hooked it to the J-box and your CVC is stuck in a hot mic

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Male black scoping out this pharmacy.

The crack bar. Nice.

>>127528962
>>127528582

post more aesthetics please, im building a folder

Bake fresh bread!

Anyone baking?

>>127486005
NYC a shit

>>127529205
>>127529206
Stand by.

Ah dear Male White. What were you thinking?

>>127529074
And that someone would be me...I actually did that once.
The best is during gunnery when they hot-mic the entire intercom system to transmit out on the SINCGARS so it can be recorded by Charlie Niner-Two for future playback/hilarity/punishment.

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>>127529267

>>127529373
>>127529373
>>127529373
>>127529373

NEW NEW

>>127529373
>>127529373
>>127529373
>>127529373

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Male white got his ass kicked here five minutes ago.

Mother of God! They're still on FM?
That's hilarious.
http://www.radioreference.com/apps/db/?ctid=606

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>>127527869
>>127528141
>>127528281
>>127528469
>>127528612
>>127528925
>>127529079
your posting streetviews is much appreciated
>>127529142