Incestuous Relationships Thread

>>30748327
Meh

>>30748337
Eh

>>30748348
Peh

>>30748363
Feh

>>30748364
Heh

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Nerdy Shut-it Sisters would have been better, but I didn't bother making the new thread, so geh.

>You will never be forced to find a new make-out place on the CPA grounds when you go to your usual janitor's closet with your sister, Moonie, but you find Shiny finger-fucking his sister, Twily

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>>30748327
>Not even "alcoholic mom edition"
Fucking normalfags I tell you hwat

>>30748327
Someone draw Chryssi mom forcing Anon's face into her crotch with a bottle in her hand

>>30748387
>mom drinkan
>I'm so alone :'(((((
>But yur always by my side sweet nonny
>Touch arm
>Touch pec
>Touch shoe
>Touch dicc
>omg anun you're 20% bigger than the average human male
>Lets fugggg
No.

>>30748418
replace the "mom drinking" with just a ________ and that describes just about every green in this general

>>30748418
Delete this

>>30747581
god dammit i hooted. you made me HOOT
>>30747921
I've never understood why it isn't just 'incest thread'
relationship is sort of implied.
>>30748237
i'm pretty good at rhymes. we might could collab. i wrote some in the past that people liked.
>>30748248
nobody is suggesting prepubescent. just pubescent

>>30748387
>>30748380
I still say "Make one daughter into your wife and the other into still your daughter" is the best

>Rarity has a particularly hard time with Ornstein and Smough, and decides to quit for the night and try again tomorrow
>After much tossing and turning she finally manages to fall asleep
>In the middle of the night she feels someone shaking her shoulder
>"Anon?"
>As her view comes into focus she sees two figures standing over her
>Anon and Sweetie Belle are standing there, wearing Ornstein and Smough costumes and yelling at her about being "Casul"
>Rarity lets out a scream, and eventually her father rushes into the room
>Only he's wear a Legend costume and starts yelling at her to hand over the humanity and no one gets hurt

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>>30748582

>>30748327
end-of-thread repost

>Your shut-in sister only talks to you and her equally shut-in friend, Twilight
>With only two people to get feedback from vis a vis how inappropriate her behavior is, your sister starts to believe that stranger and stranger things are normal and acceptable
>Years of looking at porn but never having a boyfriend has skewed Moondancer's perception of sex
>Slowly but surely, your needy shut-in sister begins to believe that incest is acceptable
>This is reinforced by the casual incest-based conversation she has with Twilight
>It's only a matter of time before she makes her move

>Moondancer stumbles over to her computer through her perpetually dark room, absent-mindedly swinging the door shut with her fingertips.
>There's piles of clothes on the ground, but she knows the path of clean(ish) floor well enough that she can navigate them in the darkness.
>On a little window locked to the corner of her screen, her best friend's pale face greets her.
>Twilight must have noticed movement coming from the feed of Moondancer's own webcam, because she turns towards the screen and leans forward.
>Twilight speaks up before Moondancer even has a chance to sit down in her comfy (if worn) chair.
>>"Did you get'em?"
>Twilight bites her lip and stares wide-eyed at the video feed.
>>"Y-You said you'd try to grab a pair of Anon's u-underwear today. Did you?"
>Moondancer nods excitedly and holds up her hand.
>Held tight in her sweaty grip is a pair of underwear.
>"Yeah! Oh my god, check'em!"
>Moondancer looks away from the screen to admire her treasure, holding the article of clothing out at arm's length to allow the dim light of her monitor to illuminate the underwear.
>"My brother doesn't even do his laundry for another few days. He won't miss a pair of dirty underwear."
>Moondancer pulls the underwear to her face and buries her nose in it, taking a deep whiff.
>Twilight watches her best friend through the video, looking (and feeling) jealous.

>>30748596
There is no desperate loser nerd stereotype that isn't hot when it's a girl

>>30748607
I don't know, man. I get it's supposed to be a bit of a joke, but that short moonie green last thread was pretty disgusting.

i'm gonna repost this prompt because I really like it and no one Saw It on last thread

>Sister Chrysalis is a master of disguise.
>she falls in love with you
>pretends to be your girlfriend for finaly being with you.

>>30748552
It is. Comfy as fuck.

A nice homestead, hardworking single dad, a few daughters. Just you and them eking out an existence.
And as they start to grow up, one becomes the wifely presence you've been lacking for so long.

>>30748622
it was also quite inaccurate and dysphemistic
pubic hair that hasnt been cut is by definition the softest and least scratchy

>>30748380
But, what if you fall into the clutter of Moonies room and are lost forever?

>>30748622
If she were a shut-in and slightly socially-retarded without making her greasy and stuff, then it would have been pretty hot. I mean, there's "sex in the air" smell, and then there's "have not showered in 5 days" smell.

>>30748746
Yeah, there's a line. I mean, I've been a disgustingly sloppy shut in before, but I still bathed regularly.

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>>30748622
Yeah but that was intentionally a worse case scenario "how disgusting can I make this while still keeping it strangely arousing"

Just get rid of the smell and leg hair and you could make it full on sexy, don't even have to have her shave, just say she naturally doesn't have a lot of hair

>>30748788
Nah, keep her disgusting like she should be.

>>30748788
I know.
>how disgusting can I make this while still keeping it strangely arousing
You did a pretty good job, too.

>>30748788
>Popular girls are secretly jealous of shut-in Moondancer
>Doesn't need to shave her legs because her body hair is soft, thin, and downy
>Doesn't have to put any products in her hair to make it look nice because her hair is just naturally low-maintenance
>Shit like this is why Moondancer doesn't see what the big fucking deal is with bathing regularly; her body seems to take care of itself without much help from her
And now Moondancer can be a shut-in who has poor hygiene without being greasy.

>>30748809
Anon fucking a giant slaver dust mite green within the clutter when?

Forest Gump

>>30748746
I'll take not showered in 3 days (but importantly have been sitting naked in a cool room, not exercising) thanks

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Guys, calm down, lest you summon "good smelling musk" anon

>>30749044
you're the only one triggered here.

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>>30749044
>"Showering is bad!"
>"MUH BODY OILS!"
>"I am overweight and have health issues."
Every time.

>>30749083
It's easy to make someone look bad if you carefully tweak a few details and then outright lie

>>30749083
what the actual fuck is that comic

>>30749140
>He doesn't know about Crystals1986
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9270u0MkI2w

>>30749140
it's a parody of some really fucking disturbing shit found on deviantart. 'permanent bologna tongue' kind of shit

>>30749140
>He doesn't know Crystal treatment.

>>30749153
Honestly it makes a weird amount of sense. It's like some kid who is severely detached from reality read some book about medical treatment and interpreted it through his lens
There's some fucked up stuff around, yknow? If you eat a bunch of "colloidal" silver, and rub it all over your face, you turn fucking blue-purple permanently

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>>30748547
>nobody is suggesting prepubescent
In the picture in question, it was very obvious that the boy was prepubescent. He looks like he's 10 at best.

>>30749174
You could age anon up to about 13 or 14 if you wanted

>>30749174
He looks like he's fucking, so...

>>30749174
>Not wanting your hot cousin to fuck you while teaching you about girls

>>30748327
would not be bad if not ponies

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You've just caught your cousin dabbin on dem haters. What do?

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>>30749626
Throw water at her

>>30749626
>>30749662
"No normie memes in this house young lady."
>"But, Ah'm older than you."

>>30749626
Jesus, I'm officially an old man, because I don't understand a word of what you just said. I'm 24, I'm too young to no longer be down with the youth these days. I-I'm hip on your lingo! S-swag?

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>>30749677
>"Yer jus jealous cause I got my own fidgety spinner"

>>30749687
This, what the hell does that mean? dabbing is partaking in hashish oil and haters are self-explanatory, but how does one dab ON them?

>>30749662
well now this needs to be some green somehow

>>30749744
Apparently it's some normalfag meme where you lift both your arms to one side.

No, I don't get it either

>>30749757
>lift both arms to one side
so like the fusion dance?

>>30749729
>Appul doesn't actually like it. She knows that these so called "Normies" pisses off her cousin.

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>>30749687
>>30749744
It all boils down to this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Owasda2eak4&autoplay=1

>>30749764
>tfw some dude I was talking to mention that "he was a big guy"
>The urge overtakes me, and in my shittiest Bane voice let out four (you)'s
>Dude just looks at me weird

>>30749744
>>30749687
Unless you're Jake Paul or a twelve year old white boy, you'll never understand dabbing

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When do we rape cousin Aj for being a Normie?

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Is dabbing supposed to be this generation's Skip-It, or those shoes with lights on them that light up when you walk? Or their cool-kid 2000's version of a Tamagotchi? Wait, wasn't dabbing that thing kids did where they laid down horizontally across tw-no, that was planking.

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>>30749817
Man, you're old

>>30749764
Wait so it's the dramatic "no/alas" gesture? that already has a name.

>>30749817
skip-it was clever in the 60s when toys were competing with sticks, light-up shoes are just inherently awesome and to this day I want them so badly I would be willing to actually pay an additional 40 dollars as long as the lighting system was durable, had replaceable batteries, didn't ruin the flexibility of the shoes, and the LEDs were blue

LCD games are just cheap videogame alternatives for poeple who cant afford videogames

>>30749829
I refuse to believe I'm old while I'm still in my 20s. That's bullshit lies.

>>30749848
The future is now, you old fart

>>30749855
Fuck you. I used to trade pokemon on the playground and there was this one kid who had an original gameboy instead of a gameboy color.

>>30750192
>not trading fidget spinners

>>30750262
Nobody back then traded anything short of a mewtwo for one of those.

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Mrs. Cake gets very little love around here despite being a canon mother

>>30750465
>Mrs. Cake will never come to your room as soon as your twin siblings fall asleep
>You will never make your mom feel young again

Holy shit, look at that ass.

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How many writefags are still alive even? Seems like Dexfag Rarity anon is the only regular who still comes around here.

>>30750465
frumpy hairdo

>>30750731
i'm around i just have no motivation and even less time
all I do now is give prompts and short random greens

>>30750931
Give us some drunk mommy Chryssi

>>30748582
Okay, have a (you), that was pretty funny. Does Mom dress as Queelag?

>>30751128
She crab walks into the room with pieces of tape holding her pussy spread wide open and roars.

>>30751144
Okay, that was even funnier, you killed my boner from laughing so hard. Good job man, I salute you.

>>30750731
I'm alive but that's more unfortunate than anything

>>30751182
true

Would it be fine if Anon was a pony or no?

>>30751235
No

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>>30751235
This thread needs more pony.

>>30751235
Sure

>>30751235
If you want to write it go ahead, more green is more green

>>30750973
I'm not a big fan of her honestly. though I would love to do something with fluffle puff

>>30751144
taped-open pussy is always good. we need more low-level humiliation shit. especially cutting rara or dash down to size... or teasing flutters because secretly she gets off on it hard

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>>30751235
Not a fan of not being human, honestly. But at the same time, I would like to see incest general open itself to more than just EQG stuff. Go for it.

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>You will never intentionally wear flame pattern cargo shorts, a leather trench coat, and knee high socks with sandals around your high fashion mother

>>30751555
>"Anon, darling, could you come here for a moment, I bought this gorgeous lingerie and I needed your opinion on it"
>You rush to your moms room as fast as your parachute pants and severely oversized running shoes allow you to run
>When you open the door she's standing there fully clothed, holding up and examining a hanger with some very lacy and moderately see through underwear and stockings
>"Ah, there you are Anon dear, I-"
>She scans your outfit quickly
>"Oh, never mind, I'll just ask Fluttershy instead, I know you're a bit... Fashion impaired"
>From that day forth you constantly attempt to dress yourself better, your mother constant enticing you with promises of skimpy swimsuits and lingerie
>Eventually when she does finally start wearing it and asking your opinion, giving you a little private "runway show," you realize you're dressed like a complete twink
>tfw she played you like a god damn fiddle!

>>30748327
i really want to fuck chrysalis

>>30750465
oh boi she thicc

>>30751605
OH FUCKING BOI

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Have we ever had a story about big Gilda onee-chan to teach Anon how to be a proper bully?

>>30751421
>>30751276
>>30751274
>>30751259
>>30751250
Alright I'll get on it then. I promise, at worst he'll be a Pegasus or unicorn, no alicorn (Unless it's Celestia but even then I'll make him weak not overpowered.) He'll be the default green and not some black and red bullshit.

>>30751235
It wouldn't be fine.

>>30748418
>touch shoe
Ark! How scandalous!

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Here we go, my first one. Not sure about the pacing but i'll start to post it anyway.

>Be Anon, you live at home with your single mother Pinkie Pie, so constantly upbeat and supportive, you don't know how she keeps it up
>"Anon sweety, what's wrong? You haven't touched your pizza and its your favourite. And don't forget we have cookie dough ice cream with sprinkles for dessert!"
"I dunno, just not hungry i guess."
>You didn't really want to explain what was wrong, schools always lame and you know Pinkie worries. Best not to bring it up.
>You hadn't noticed that while being deep in thought, mom had stood up and walked around the table to position herself in front of you.
>"I know that face! Somethings majorly up!"
>She plants a hand on each of your shoulders and gets right in your face.
>"You're going to tell mummy pinkie right now!"
>You sigh, but know deep down it would be easier to let it out now. You had always been close to your mom and she was really easy to talk to.
"Well, i'm sorta stressing out about exams, and not really getting anywhere with any of the girls at school. My friends have all sort of... you know?"
>It did feel a little weird talking about it so openly, maybe you should have left the 2nd part out?

>>30751926

>Pinkie gasps
>"You mean all your friends have got down and done the bad thing but my little nonnys still a virgin?!"
>You blush, if you knew this was the type of reaction you were going to get you might not have said anything at all.
"Well, I haven't really got anywhere with anyone, I don't really get invited to parties and I also screw up when talking to-"
>You are cut off as Pinkie, who is still holding your shoulders shakes you and starts to exclaim.
>"That just isn't fair! How could any girl resist my little nonny! And you have your exams! How are you going to relieve your stress without some bedtimefuntime?!"
>You look at your mother, bewildered.
>"That's it! I'm gonna sort both of these problems out right now. Nonny, come with me to my room - i'm going to take your virginity and drain your balls at the same time."
>You try to interupt your mom in disbelief, not even sure you heard her right.
"Woa woa woa wait what are you saying mom?!"
>"Don't you see? It's the perfect plan! Not only do you get to lose your virginity, but I can make sure you are doing it right AND destress you for your exams."
>"Up, up we go!"
>She orders you up the stairs. Still in disbelief you agree and make your way up. It would be great to lose your virginity... what are you saying? This is your MOM we are talking about!

>>30751929

>Pinkie pauses for a second.
>"Erm, nonny, go ahead and wait in my room. Get comfortable. There's something I need to take care of first."
>She rushes off to the bathroom and slams the door shut.
"I guess she really needed to go?"
>You're not sure why you are going through with this, but it isn't bothering you as much as it probably should. And that bothers you even more.
>You and mom have always been close, like friends close. You even call her Pinkie sometimes. Maybe this will be fun? Pinkie does always make everything fun...
>Entering your moms room, everything is pink, as you would expect from her. You walk over to her giant double bed and sit down.
>You remember bouncing up and down on this bed with her when you were younger, pretending it was a bouncy castle. I guess now you're going to be bouncing in a different way?
>After a while, you wonder where she has gotten to, what is she doing in the bathroom? Deciding to rest a while, you lay down on the bed. You must of been tired as you soon drift off...

>>30751933
Ignored

>>30751933

>"Sleeping on the job Nonny?"
>You awake to find Pinkie straddling you on all fours...naked?!
>"Come on, I wasn't gone THAT long was I?"
"M-Mom you're naked?!"
>"Well durr! How else are we gonna do it?"
>It was only now that you realise your pants are no longer on.
>"I realised I was out of rubbers, so I had to make... alternate arrangements."
"What do you mean alter-"
>You are cut off as Pinkie sticks your already semi dick in her mouth, and proceeds to suck on it like one of her fancy lolipops.
>"Mmmff mm mmffphf!"
>"Ahem! First things first we need to get this little guy up and ready to go..."
>Years of sucking on various candies has given her a mouth like a goddamn vacuum cleaner, you desperately try to hang on, not wanting to go too soon.
"Ah! It's too much, i'm gonna-"
>Pinkie immediately stops.
>"No no no, not yet, we haven't even got to the fun part yet!"

Got to write some more, maybe I should get drunk first.

>>30751941
Consider not doing it at all.

>>30751941
As much as i'd like to see more, it's just
> :(
> y long face?
> no fug
> lets fug
> ok
> *fug*
scenario. Unless it's some esoteric fug, it needs either an unpredicted context, or fuller intro. Scratch that, any intro.

>>30751981

mm, yeh you're right. Thanks for the feedback, i'll go back to the drawing board.

>>30752065
I mean, there's still time to introduce some creative kink

>>30750731

NEEDS MORE EYES

>>30752065
I kinda understand you.

it's difficult write this kind of stories, since It always end Up like either:
* Fug > Feels
* Fug = Feels
* Fug < Feels
>while the first is the worst, is the more easy to write when you're new on this things
>The 3rd is always good, but will end up being difficult to fap to It.
>and the middle one (=) is generaly the best, but is the hardest to write, since you need to actually set a good story and make it kinda romantic, without skiping the fug.

>>30750731
I'm still here, but I've lost faith in my writing abilities.

>>30751543
>Rarity is just standing there, breathing heavily; almost hyperventilating
>"THIS. IS. FINE."

>>30750731
I would like to be a writefag, but muh english ain't that good.

>>30751543
>not doing it on purpose to tease your mom

>>30752254
Jeff?

>>30751981
This. It doesn't need to be a novel, but just having a mother character jump straight to 'lets fug' is kinda jarring.

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>>30752268
>Rarity reaches her breaking point when she sees you wearing black fingerless gloves and a studded leather belt
>Pulls you into her bedroom and forcibly strips you down, muttering about much of a disgrace to fashion your clothing is
>"If you aren't responsible enough not to wear sins against the fashion gods, then you aren't responsible enough to pick out your own clothes. I'm going to make you an entire new wardrobe, darling, and there isn't a thing you can to do stop me! No, you cannot put your clothes back on; I dare say my creative focus will be completely lost if I have to look at one more flame motif. Yes, I know I can 'see everything'. I changed your diapers, dear; I've /already/ seen everything. No, I won't make your aunt stay in the guest room until I'm done working. That's very rude, Anon, and I know I raised you better than that. You'll just have to put up with being a little chilly until I am finished creating my wearable masterpieces."
>Predictably, your nudity around the house distracts Rarity a bit more than she thought it would
>She has to start over again a couple of times when she realizes half-way through that she had been sewing crotchless pants for you to wear, which turns her 3-day task into a week-long job
>And it certainly doesn't help her concentration that you've suddenly become much more popular with your aunt Sweetie Belle, who volunteers to hang around you and make sure you don't violate the terms of your mom's punishment
>"Hey now, no clothes, remember? Put that blanket down, Anon. Yes, a blanket counts as clothes. Yes, I know you're a bit cold. Here, how about I snuggle with you and share some of my body heat?"

>>30752675
I want this.

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>>30752675
>>30752706
>"Oh, dear, the underwear doesn't fit. Oh well, darling; C'est la vie. Take it off so that I can do a few more measurements, okay? Hmm... If you'll pardon your mother's brutish tongue, Anonymous, your erection is quite in the way of my measurements. I dare say any new undergarments I create will be too baggy in the front if you don't, er... calm yourself down. Wh-why don't you 'take care of it' for me right now?"
>"Yes, I know it's a little awkward to pleasure yourself while your own mother is kneeling in front of you, and I suppose that you would prefer that I would not be at eye-level with your privates, but I assure you that it's absolutely necessary. I know how quickly handsome young men such as yourself bounce back after they climax, so I have to measure you immediately after you 'arrive'."
>"Oh! Oh, goodness! Th-that was a bit more v-volume than I had expected!"
>"N-No, darling, don't apologize. I sh-should have known you would get it all over my face. I'll clean my glasses and wash my hair in a few minutes."
>"Now hold still, Anonymous; I have mere seconds to give your a proper measuring before you become erect once more."

>>30752771
>"Yes, darling... just like that. Long strokes."

>>30752771
>>30752775
Is she waiting for me to lose patience with her teasing and just take her

Or is that just an Aunt Sweetie thing.

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Rarimom wears the swimsuits she makes to have an excuse to show off her son her well aged milf body.

>>30749677
*cue rainbow*

>did someone say memes?

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>>30752771

>>30752790
No, you're waiting for HER to finally give in and jump YOU. It'll be a combination of lust, and knowing that her sister is making the moves on her son that'll wear her down. Maybe after the 3rd time she needs to measure you for underwear, she'll take a shuddering breath and slowly reach out a shaking hand to "relieve" you herself.

>"J-Just relax, love. It'll s-save time if I d-do this m-myself..."
>"Maybe... maybe consider sleeping in my bed with me, darling? I still haven't finished your new wardrobe, and I can only imagine how cold your bedroom must be at night when you're huddled under your blanket without a shred of clothing. And if it would make sleeping in the nude in the same bed as your mother feel less awkward, I suppose I could do away with my nightie whilst we sleep together. I've heard that skin contact makes cuddling feel so much warmer, darling."
>"My poor Anonymous doesn't even have a lock on his bedroom door,
and I can hear Sweetie Belle prowling around when she thinks I'm asleep."

>>30752771
>>30752899
>"Oh dear, it appears as though I were too slow, darling; you're hard again. Well, don't keep your mother waiting, please; pleasure yourself once more so that I may get some accurate measurements."
>"Whoops! Oh, I'm going to have to wash my hair /twice/ after this."

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>>30751735
>Unless it's Celestia but even then I'll make him weak not overpowered.
Oh shit, I'm imagining a constantly mothering, doting Celestia always hovering over her weaker than average, frail foal and it's disgustingly adorable.

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>>30751711
>Gilda onee-chan
>Revy cosplay
>Gilda has super tough in public, but a giant weeaboo at home with Anon

>She corners you in some secluded hallway between classes
>"Hey, dweeb. Make sure you pick up some snacks on the way home. The new season of [insanely long anime title] is online and we need to watch it."
"But Gil, I don't have much money left and I don't even like tha-"
>You're cut off by your sister's patented eagle-eye staredown
"Umm... I'll pick up those 'Pokie' things you like so much-"
>"They're called 'Pocky', you dumbass. And make sure you get the chocolate ones this time. Anything else and I'll bash your fucking head in!"

>>30751981
I dunno, i liked it okay. needs work obviously, but it's a start

>>30753124
>"Y-you'd better get the right ones, or else I'll make you tickle me til I cum!"
>"Don't test me, dweeb."

>>30753124
>"How come you never get a nosebleed when you see my panties like in my mangas, Anon?"
>"If it doesn't happen next time, I'm giving you one myself! Got it, dweeb?"

>>30753219
sounds like an insufferable cunt

>>30753013
>that image
hnng

>>30753154
Hi boner, how are you?

>>30753219
eat a lot of Doritos. believe me, It can make your nose bleed.

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>>30752771
>>30752925
W-WEW LAD

>>30753481

anon, that's not legal

>>30753481
Fluttershy is adorable.

>>30753573
She gun get DISCORDED and she gun love it!

>>30753546
Incest as a rule is usually not legal.
Nut up, nut in your daughter and have her have her own sister.

If you're not willing to go balls deep, take your balls and go home.

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>>30753481

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>tfw no strong, 7' tall sister who will let you ride her shoulders backwards

>>30753581
isn't politicaly correct, but It ain't ilegal at least not in my county

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>>30753600
>>tfw no strong, 7' tall sister who will let you ride her shoulders
meh
>>backwards
Diamond Tier Dick (DTD)

>>30753685
that's quartz and is super brittle
you don't want your dick breaking

>>30753757
I'm sure Macarina would be gentle, though her pussy muscles are probably so strong she could lift you into the air by your dick alone

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>>30753593

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>>30753768

>>30753784
I think you killed the thread dumbass

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>>30754235
Dose this fix it?

>>30754262
yes

>>30754262
Oh shit, that pic reminds me...

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>>30754235
The fact that all our writefags are gone killed the thread.

>>30754427
>literally the next post above you
m8, you're hurting my feelings
give me like an hour or something

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>>30752665
It's alright almost satan. I find it amusing that there are so many damn "prompts" of milf pinkie and how she'd be so willing to ride anon until the ponies came home, and now that it finally happens it's too unrealistic? Make up your fucking minds lads.

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>>30748327
>You will never look through your moms old year book and find out she used to be a total fucking nerd, which happens to be your fetish
>You will never be able to control yourself around the picture of your mothers very awkward high school years
>One day you will never run into her room when you think she's out and start jerking off over her picture, imagining struggling to pull that sweater over her headgear braces
>When jerking off over her picture in the yearbook you will never hear her come into the room, high heels in hand and a look of absolute horror in the other
>She will never slowly back out of the room not to alert you, deeply disturbed by what she just witness
>But a small part of her will never start telling her to dress a little nerdier when at home, busting out her old Hyperspace sweater (which barely fits anymore) and comically oversized glasses

>>30754502
I would like this shit.

sounds difficult tho

>>30754502
I just want my nerdy, socially-awkward (and inexplicably extremely physically attractive) sister Chrysalis to smother my face with her breasts.

>>30754921
>Even despite the glasses and braces your sister is actually super attractive
>Doesn't know it because all the jealous girls ruthlessly bully her into thinking she's a disgusting freak

>>30754977
Fuck her, Anon. Fuck the self-esteem into her. Turn her into the love-hungry bitch she is on TV.

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https://pastebin.com/aenqVpGr
>>30726559
>You hadn't exactly been lying when you said you were late, as opportune as your exit may have been, just... stretching the truth a little.
>Spending the next couple of hours throwing pebbles for cats to chase may not be considered the best use of your time, but damn it all, you are the pharaoh.
>Should anyone disapprove of how you use the gaps in your schedule, they may discuss it with the crocodiles.
>You gulp, noticing the color palette of one of the cats resembles your mother's hair.
>The thought of the day's events keep nagging at you. You've seen neither of your relatives since, not that you've made yourself easily found.
>Despite having your mother as regent to carry out your duties, most of your days are actually fairly busy, mostly with education.
>Besides the stories and the literature you are expected to know by heart, you have more practical subjects to master.
>The workings of the skies weren't all that difficult, but the geometry is probably more likely to kill you than the combat training, which is at least enjoyable.
>But none of that is scheduled for today.
>On the fourth day of every week, your entire curriculum is set aside to make way for your least favorite 'activity'.
>Poison immunization, courtesy of your mother's paranoid love, after rumors started circulating that your predecessor's death had not been an accident.
>It's exactly as fun as it sounds, but perhaps a day of profuse sweating and banging headaches are exactly what you need to clear your mind.
>Or who knows, really? Maybe this time, you'll vomit your stomach inside out, or hallucinate a foreign invasion.
>Leaving the cats to their devices, you walk through the courtyard as discreetly as you can, not feeling like mingling with the sycophants all over the residence.
>Walking towards the Great River, you eventually find a complex of pillars standing out of an artificial river junction.
>It's your private bathing area.

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>>30755120
>Reaching the usual spot inside the shadow of one of the pillars, your eyes find the person you were looking for.
>An old man, dark of skin; a nomad hailing from the dunes beyond the setting sun.
>Noticing you coming, he splays a carpet out on the ground beneath his feet, holding a small bag in his hand.
>Without saying a word, he empties its contents on the blanket.
>A dozen or so paralyzed scorpions fall out, half of them squirming on their backs, the other half sluggishly attempting to run away.
>Your day is about to get a whole lot worse.
>The old man picks up one of the massive scorpions by the tail, and then, to your dismay, he picks up another.
"Wait..."
>You take a step back, swallowing every drop of saliva in your mouth.
>He holds up two fingers, speaking in his heavy accent.
>"You ready."
>He motions you to sit.
>You had just managed to work your way up to a single live sting a couple of months ago, which was debilitating enough, but two..?
>That's a lethal dose for the largest of men. You'd even worry about a *horse*.
>Saying a silent prayer to the goddess Serket as you accept your fate, you sit down on the sand.
>Wasting no time, the old man pricks you with both stingers at the same time near the same spot on your arm.
>You flinch so hard, you end up back on your feet.
>The man just nonchalantly collects his scorpions and walks away.
>You begin breathing through your teeth as your focus goes back to your arm.
>A fiery throbbing begins spreading throughout your entire body as you stumble out of your clothing.
>You know from experience that the cool river-water won't ease the pain, but the urge is too strong to resist.
>Walking in, you sit down against a boulder, the shallow water only reaching your chest.
>It's about now that the dizziness starts setting in.
>Even worse, any speck of light hurts your eyes, forcing you to cover them with your hand.
>Knowing you have your privacy, you begin groaning pathetically.
>"Anon?"

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>>30755128
>FUCK. Did someone just call you by your nickname?
>That's a mortal offense for most people, but there are no guards around and you are in no state to uphold the law yourself.
>You look between your fingers to the riverbank across from you, but see nobody.
>A couple of silent seconds pass, until you hear the sound of legs wading through water.
>Looking again, you catch a blurry glimpse of blue hair before shielding your eyes from the infernal daylight.
>Of course.
>"I had to ask around to find you."
>You feel disturbances in the water caused by a body sitting next to you, bare skin pressing against your side.
"A-and..?"
>"And I figured you might want some company. Are those scorpion stings?"
>Company? There's a reason you didn't bring a pair of guards or some servants.
>You don't care much for the idea of your subjects witnessing their divine ruler tormented by bird prey.
>Not feeling like explaining your reasoning, you stay silent, tolerating her presence on account of her being family.
>A particularly bad ache rumbles through your head, forcing you to stifle a whimper.
>Sensing your discomfort, your aunt wraps an arm around you.
>Being in no condition to reject her uncharacteristically caring gesture, you lean into her.
>"Wow, you are HOT. Should I have the priests prepare a sacrifice for your health?"
"N-no."
>You were apprehensive about her presence at first, but this is actually pretty nice.
"It will pass... in a couple of hours..."
>She pulls you closer into her side, resting your heads against each other.
>"Then I will stay here for a couple of hours."
>You gulp, a weird mixture of feelings burgeoning through the fever, providing an odd relief.
>Does she feel bad about the argument earlier?
>You could have expected something like this from your mother if she weren't always so busy, but your mischievous aunt?
>Blushing so hard might have been more embarrassing if you weren't already radiating heat, so you just enjoy the situation.
"T-thanks..."

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>>30753546

Not even close

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>>30755134
>You're not sure how much time has passed, but your head is finally rid of its aching.
>Removing your hand from your eyes, the first thing you see is your aunt, whose lap you ended up sitting on.
>She hasn't moved at all.
>If there was ever a time for you to feel bad about having considered her an annoyance, this was it.
>"Feeling better?"
>Your headache is mostly gone, but your fever is probably going to linger on into the night.
"Yeah..."
>Having your mental clarity back, you remember why you isolated yourself.
"Were you being serious earlier..?"
>"About being your wife?"
>You nod, eyes finding a bird in the sky.
>"Entirely, no other man is worthy of my royal blood."
>Swallowing some saliva, your mind wanders back, remembering your mother's words.
"But... your servants? Are they not commoners?"
>"Ah, yes, but you misunderstand... none of them are men."
"What? What does tha-oh."
>Having witnessed that kiss, you can believe it.
>Still sitting in her lap, your aunt wraps an arm around you, leaning into your ear.
>"Does the thought excite you?"
>She reaches her other hand down, making contact with your most sensitive spot, eliciting a sharp breath.
>"Well, it seems we have converging interests."
>Three fingers slowly pull the skin down your lesser head, then back up.
"W-whoa..."
>Your heart rate jumps, surprised by the intensity of the sensations.
>"This could be a very..."
>She forms a fist around your erection, performing the same motions with increased pace.
>"...fulfilling..."
>Squirming in her arms, your labored breathing only eggs her on further.
>"...marriage."
>Pressure building like nothing you've ever felt before, you feel some kind of end coming.
>Instinctively lifting your hips into her fist, a gasp escapes your mouth along with an explosion of pleasure.
"Hnnnggg..."
>You fall back into her grasp, slowly regaining your breath.
>Tightening her grip on you, she kisses the edge of your mouth.
>"Just a taste of what's to come, if you'll have me..."

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>>30755143

that's the dump

>>30753481
Hmm, they are wearing too many clothes
like three or four too many clothes

>>30753481

>pantyhose in that rarity

I want to commit a crime

>>30755179
very nice. need more.

>You walk in on your daughters Rarity and Sweetie Belle while they're changing clothes and they react in surprise and alarm
>You didn't teach them that. What happened? Why's it okay to change with your sister but not your dad?
>You realize you haven't seen their bodies in a long time, and that's kind of messed up. A dad should know all that stuff
>You sit the two of them down and have a talk about how it's not healthy for family to have a lot of secrets or physical distance from each other, and from now on you should all feel comfortable wearing as little as you want in the house.
>Rarity turns pink and objects in a variety of vociferous but utterly flaccid ways that you find it easy to ignore. Sweetie just kind of puts a finger to her lips and thinks about it
>Just to set a good example, you stand up and ditch your clothes. Sweetie Belle's expression changes to one of delight
"Are you going to join me, Sweetie? It's a real load off"
>"Sure, Dad!" she squeaks as she starts tossing her clothes around the room excitedly.
>The both of you look over at Rarity, silently expecting her to get with the program, but rather than embarrassment or horror you see a look of hunger on her face.
>Why is she staring at your member and drooling like that? Has she never seen one before? This policy change came just in time, or maybe a little late.
>She seems so hypnotized by your cobra that she doesn't notice or doesn't care when her younger sister tugs off her designer clothes. "Lift your feet, Rarity!"
"You'll get used to it soon, Rares. In the meantime, you just stare all you want"
>You sit down on the couch and turn the TV on, eager to catch up on dad stuff. Sweetie eagerly hops onto your lap and hugs your arm. Clearly she enjoys skin contact. Rarity hasn't moved yet. Oh well, she won't stay a statue forever.

>>30755337
>>"Sure, Dad!" she squeaks as she starts tossing her clothes around the room excitedly.
kek
that gave me a giggle

top cute

>>30755179
Nice. I'm really liking it so far.

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>Russian cousin Trixie will never decide that you are her husband and try to take you back to her country

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>You will never go on vacation to visit your Cousin to Yakyakistan, not having seen her in years
>You will never arrive to her house, a tiny looking log hut with a thatch roof
>You will never knock on the door
>An 8' tall woman will never step out screaming "Cousin anon!" and lift you off the ground with a hug
>You will never notice that even under all her layers of fur she's obviously quite well endowed
>When she shows you the inside of her house you will never see that she only has one bed that the two of you will have to share

>>30756036
Eh. Russian cousin Trixie was fun for a while but kind of lost its charm for me

>>30756125
yes please hairy amazon cousin

>>30756125
>8' tall woman
>layers of fur
wot

>>30756426
That was supposed to be furs, as in fur jackets and stuff
Yakyakistan is cold, cuddling is a good way to keep warm since you can't feed the fire all night

>>30756452
and she's naked under those furs? right?
and she just pulls you underneath them

>>30756581
>"Aileen, have you gained weight?"
>"No Prince Rutherford, I just have my cousin under here"
>She opens up her jacket a bit to reveal your squished face snuggly between her breasts

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>Your overly excitable little sister will never consider you one of the coolest people in her life and loves you unconditionally, completely blind to the fact that you're a total fucking loser who hates himself for numerous reasons
>When she finds out about your extremely low opinion of yourself she will never go to great lengths to help you love yourself as much as she loves you

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>>30756713
Self-inserting too much don't you think?

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>>30756730
you would know

>>30756730
Doesn't pretty much everyone? I mean the whole reason anon in most stories is such a bland, uninteresting character is so anyone can project onto him

>"Hurry up, Anon! You don't want to be late for your first day as a sophomore, do you?"
>That was Rose, one of your three older sisters
>She was a set of triplets, the other two being Lilly Valley and Daisy
>Your parents, for some ungodly reason, brought it upon themselves to have another child just about as soon as biologically possible
>Because new parents raising a set of triplets wasn't enough
>Oh well, it's the future they chose
>You're making your way downstairs, backpack already on your back, with all of the getting ready for a school day done
>Rose did have a point, even though the four of you were running early, enough dawdling could make you late
>It's not your fault you wanted to look as sharp as possible
>Your first year was dedicated to surviving, getting good grades started early, and generally getting used to high school
>But now that that's out of the way, this year is the year you're gonna score yourself a girlfriend
>Sure there are plenty of handsomer, more athletic guys than you at the school
>But with a male-to-female ratio like CHS has, there's gonna be plenty of uncaught fish in the sea
>As long as your standards aren't too high, or too low, you'll do just fine
>You've spent all summer trying to build your confidence, and with the help of your sisters, you've gained quite a bit of self-esteem
>The four of you make your way down the street to the bus stop, the three girls chatting away about what junior year will be like
>Rose, the youngest of the triplets; even among the three of them she was the best botanist
>She's been reading books about plants since she could read, and her knowledge of all things plant life was almost uncanny
>In fact she's already been accepted to Canterlot University after her paper on biochemical altering of plants floored the judges
>She's a bit shy and twitchy, but also kind, and can be pretty social with people she's opened up to

>Pinkie Pie in particular has become fairly close friends with her for someone not in the Technicolor Anime Magical Girl Group
>She was the first person to tell her that her paper was good (based on Twilight Sparkle's assessment), and that she should send it to CU
>Lilly Valley is the middle child of them, though that's not saying much
>She's a traditional romantic, always dreaming of marrying her prince charming and having a big family in a big house
>When asked why she doesn't aim for more, like being a doctor or CEO, she shrugs and says 'I don't wanna'
>She loves writing, and though high fantasy and romance are her things, she's been branching out to other genres to broaden her abilities
>Based on what you've read, she could probably make it as a professional writer if she can build the right connections
>Her collection of youth writer awards is nothing to scoff at either, with state level wins and national runner up prizes on her shelf
>Then there's Daisy, the oldest of your sisters, and the most outgoing and sociable
>She's on the CHS soccer team as a wing forward and offensive midfielder, and she's trained a lot at it
>Her grades clock in at a C+ average; she's by no means dumb but not really a bookworm either
>She hopes to also go to Canterlot U but as a member of the Canterlot Cavaliers
>And with her rivaling Rainbow Dash as best player in the high school league, it'd be surprising if she DIDN'T get an acceptance letter sometime soon
>Then there's you, Anonymous
>Not much in the way of unique and special talents, you mostly play video games and do amateur programming
>You let out a sigh as you continue to walk with your sisters
>Daisy turns to you and asks you what's wrong
"Oh nothing. I was just thinking about how amazing all of you are, and how you'll eventually be off to college without me."

>"Oh, Anon," she says as she reaches up to ruffle your hair, "you're plenty amazing too."
"Good one Daisy, I've got B average grades, no athletic teams, no national titles, and no University acceptance letters."
>Lily puts a hand around your back and side hugs you
>"Didn't you write some code for that GNU core thingy you're always talking about? That's a pretty big deal."
"They were mostly minor edits. The biggest thing I did was modify the decompression script to make installing new software packages a bit faster"
>Lilly looks at you with a blank face, clearly not understanding the intricacies of what you've said
>"I don't know what that means, but I know a lot of computers like mine use Linux.
"I'd like to-"
>"Oh I'm sorry," she says as she gives you a playful elbow jab in the ribs, "I mean GUHNOO PLUS LINUX."
>You can't deny you kinda deserved that for being such an autist about it
>"Besides, that means that thousands and thousands of computers are going to be using code that YOU wrote."
>Rose gives you a comforting smile and folds her hands, as if in prayer
>It's something she always does when she's about to give words of encouragement
>"She has a point, Anon. If you apply yourself, you could probably get a degree from Equestria State in Computer Science."
"Huh, I didn't even think about that."
>As you ponder it in your mind, it does seem like a logical option
>Might as well try to cultivate your only useful hobby and try to put it to use
"It'd suck to have to attend a different college than you guys, but they're not that long of a bus ride away"
>Daisy gives you a thumbs up
>"Yeah, plus you won't have to worry about that for a few more years"
>"And on top of that," says Lilly, "we'll still be in the same general area while you're finishing up high school, albeit the other side of the city."
>It wouldn't exactly be an easy journey to make all the time, but you'll get to see them on more than just holidays, which is nice

>>30756811
"I didn't think I'd be able to have a goal this soon like you, but once again you come through for me."
>As the three of you stop in front of the school building, you pulls your sisters in for a group hug
>Being able to hug all three at once is a nice bonus of being a big guy
>For them
"I don't know what I'd do without you guys. I just wish there was some way I could repay you for all you do for me."
>Daisy turns to you fully, and gives you the tender, motherly look that only she among your sisters can do so well
>"Just achieve your dreams in life and be happy, Anon. That's all we want from you."
>A bit of tears start to form in the corner of your eyes, so you wipe them away and embrace her
"Thanks, Daisy"
>"Don't mention it"
>Suddenly you feel a slap on your back, causing you to reel back
>You look to the side and discover that the source of the violence was your friend Norman
>"Anon, dude, you didn't tell me you had a girlfriend."
"Fuck off Norman, you know she's my sister."
>And as if there was any doubt, his shit-eating grin tells you he does indeed know this
>"Like that'll stop a desperate virgin like you. Now come on, we've gotta get going."

>>30756792
>>30756798
>>30756811
>Not linking my posts together
WTF I hate >Writefagging now
At least they're all next to each other

>>30756821
>Before he can turn and walk away, however, you give him a jab in the rib with your fist
>Not hard enough to hurt him badly, but definitely harder than playful ribbing
"Dude, that's not cool. I know we joke about a lot of stuff but that's different."
>He looks at Daisy, who's giving him a very disapproving look
>Realizing his mistake, his goofy grin turns to a guilty frown
>"Yeah, you're right. Sorry Daisy, sorry anon."
>Daisy's expression softens, and she playfully flicks Norman on the nose
>"I forgive you. Now run along, underclassmen like you can't afford to be late."
>"Psh, underclassmen? Sure thing, Deiji-senpai. C'mon, Anon. I hate to say it but she's got a point."
>So you bid farewell to your sisters and part ways with them, making your way to the gym for freshman/sophomore orientation
>A new school year will bring new opportunities for you to grow as a person, and now that you've got a goal in mind for the future you're feeling even more confident than before

Anyway, what do you think? Any interest? Continue, scrap, beg a competent writefag to pick up the concept?

>>30756792
>The four of you make your way down to the bus stop
>They end up walking to school
Just fuck my shit up senpai
Fixed in pastabin.

>>30756792
>>Your parents, for some ungodly reason, brought it upon themselves to have another child just about as soon as biologically possible
This is what I want to do.

>>30756611
>"WHY YOUR COUSIN SO PUNY?"
>"not matter, he good at snuggles"

>>30756713
Huh, that works for me. run with it!

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>>30756798
>>Lilly Valley is the middle child of them, though that's not saying much
>>She's a traditional romantic, always dreaming of marrying her prince charming and having a big family in a big house
>>When asked why she doesn't aim for more, like being a doctor or CEO, she shrugs and says 'I don't wanna'
Oh fuck, she's perfect. And to think she was already my favorite of the three.

>>30756828
I don't really get it, but i'm really sleepy right now

>>30756828
Keep going senpai.

>>30757000
>>30757061
>>30757063
Glad to hear it

Now since I'm wasting a post anyway, it's time for Tales From the Police Desk
>Not a lot of shit goes down in area, mostly small time stuff like marijuana sales
>Call about a potentially suicidal woman
>I count 15 police units and 5 fire units on the case
>County dogs are sniffing, brought a dog from a city like 20 minutes south
>Even a fucking thermal imaging gun out
>This saga has been going on since before I got to work an hour and a half ago
>Weird guy comes in with a cat in blankets and asks for an officer
>Tell him to pick up the red phone and ask for an officer, one will be with him as soon as available
>Citizen assist call never comes up on computer
>I don't think he picked the phone up
>He's gone
>Put "Back in 10 Minutes" sign up
>Go upstairs to bathroom across from range to take a shit and check the thread
>.40S&W +p+ steel casing on the floor
>That's somehow the most surprising thing to me so far

>>30757079
I feel like I'm missing something

>>30757079
this is pretty interesting.

>>30757361
Agreed. This trumps something that happened a few days ago at a KFC I work at. As stereotypical as it sounds, it happened. I came in to work at 11 and got my drawer ready as I work front counter. 5 minutes into my shift, a tour bus of 50+ African American women pulls up. We were not expecting a rush that early. We ran out of chicken pretty quickly and as soon as some came up it was sold. This went on for an hour.

>>30757366
t. Boondocks

>>30757195
Not really, just found it interesting personally. Anyway, the woman was a juvenile which explained the 2 star search. She was found and brought to the hospital.
I realize I'm blogposting but at least I'm not making a thread where the entire OP is ">watching the show"

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Can't wait for onichan's xmas special

>>30757676
It would be a Christmas miracle

>>30757676
nah, I'll wait for christmas

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Dude writing the gamer Rarity green here, just wanted to let you guys know that it might be a few days until I update again. Got a new job, got a friend coming back into town, life stuff. I'll be back.

>>30758141
Good luck with life stuff, dude writing the gamer Rarity green dude.

>>30758166
>playing on keyboard
Yeah, don't do that.

>>30756730
Why do you think the human is the physical embodiment of having no identity, and gets called "Anon" instead of "James" or "Carl"?

>>30758469
The games were never intended to be on the PC, originally Dark Souls was released on consoles and only like a year later was there a very quick PC port.

Just buy a cheap 360 controller with a cable and plug it into your PC

>>30758141
O-oh god, this is the same thing Jeff started saying before the aunt Coco green disappeared forvever

>>30758585
That may be, but Souls is borderline unplayable with a keyboard

>>30758141

>good stuff happening to a writefag
I don't believe you. Good things don't happen to writefags.

>>30758696
Why is it that most folk who writefag have absolutely shit lives?
I mean granted this is 4chan and a lot of us have shitty lives but writefags seem to be especially bad

>>30758710

1. We can't draw and charge $20 for the equivalent of a fancy doodle on commission because of inflated commission prices.

2. To publish your work you have the choice between self-publishing (you have to advertise yourself) and going through a publisher (good bye, creative control!), and odds are you won't make very much money either way.

3. Sorrow makes for better writing, like alcoholism. Make sure you edit sober, though.

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>>30758777
>Writefagging for money
Oh shit, now I get, I reckoned most you folk just did it for fun, a little hobby in your spare time.
I'm so sorry for you.

>>30758585
I find it hard to believe you don't do better with a joystick in a game that requires joystick controls, which is most of them.
i recommend nyko controllers. good shit.

>>30759403
wha? nykos are nice and big

>>30758710
>be writefag
>commute to work
>write on laptop while in train ~40 minutes of writing time where you can't do anything else anyway
>manage actually really consistent updates on weekdays unless you're on a hard scene which needs to be crafted better (or it's smut and you can't concentrate/are embarrassed to write when someone's right next to you on a full train)
>no significant other tho
>your life is so bad
I'm doing well, just fyi

>>30758777
we know it's you alex

>>30759560
non-native here too
It's mostly a mental thing

PS: hope there'll be north korean war and all the esports people starting to get too busy

>>30758829

The writefagging I do on here is just for fun, though, and I legitimately enjoy it.

I also have a nice full time job, so it's not like I'm a real poorfag.

But actually turning writefagging into a monetary gain is a pain in the ass.

>>30759534
oh man i can't stand looking at a screen while i'm on a moving vheicle

>>30760551

I write in a notebook on the rare occasions I'm in an uber/train car/bus. Electronics in public transportation are asking for trouble.

>writefagging for money
I was able to make money off of writefagging in /efg/s, but ever since writing smut was banned away to /trash/ it's not the same in any way anymore
if you want to make money off it you must probably want to learn warhammer 40k lore because it's mostly the /tg/ people who commission stuff
usual prices are like 5-10$ per 1000 words
would not recommend

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Dead thread

>>30760566
No shit. Entire board is dead as shit.

>>30760562
it's the same on paper. cant draw or read or anything while moving. i thought that was almost everyone

>>30760566
Even worse, it turned into fucking /v/ for a while.

>>30760575
a ton of people just got banned I think (I got the worst-timed ban on another board so i'm just stuck here til tomorrow morning. sucks because i finally had time to do some drawfagging for them)

>>30760594
What did you have drawn up, Anon?

>>30760586

I can write while moving, but handwriting was never my strongsuit, so it's not like it can get much worse.

>>30760607
vibration? wobbling? no it's just about focusing on a single spot while something is moving. it fucks with your system

>>30760657
Nothin yet, but i've been meaning to do more fanart for a few shows

>>30760594
Ton of people got banned? Did I miss a scruffening?

Any Writefags here? Jeff? Oni-Chan? I'll take >writterfagging if that poor bastard is still here

>>30760817
>writefagging is alive, he and Issues. That's all I think.

>>30760792
nah this was on /co/. the new yanni is just..

>>30760844
That reminds me, I need to download season 6 and get caught up.

>>30760817
I'm currently writing an incest short.
It's satyr though.

>>30760974
REEE satyrs incest scum kill urself cuck etc.

>>30761086
It would be extremely funny.

>>30760974
tiddies and teats?

>>30761199
Lovingly drinking daughterus leftover milk to relieve the pressure when incest spawn has had her fill.

>>30760974
Simple request: Please namefag so I can filter
Don't want you to not write, not gonna ree, just want to skip your story without having to scroll.
It's why I namefag: so anyone who's sick of my shit can filter my dumbass out, and I'm O.K. with it

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>You will never support your sister's decision to reopen the camp as a nudist colony

>>30760844
oh crap, new episode. i will never get used to that

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>>30757676
Damn that picture is absolute perfection.
Guess I better not keep you guys waiting. I'll get started on the next sequence. In the meantime you guys can get caught up here.

https://pastebin.com/2DRqRmpY

>>30760875
well if I ever have a commute again (please god no) i'll keep that in mind. what I did back on my commute was wedge myself in between the bus seat and the wall and try to catch up on the sleep I missed because everyone decided business hours start in the morning when all god's children are asleep
unfortunately, as you can imagine (i can draw a diagram) this folded my torso at a 90 degree angle and now my skeleton is fucked

>>30760974
as long as the wee lassie kicks up her legs excitedly at one point, you've got a reader
ungulate legs on a biped are just made for excited upward legkicking.

>>30761263
>Flutters opens up a nature preserve
>finds you hanging out naked in it
"Uh duh Flutters that's what I do. It's a nature preserve, what else would it be for?"
>surprisingly she eventually starts joining you
>becomes the best cozy fun place around for all your friends

>>30761245
Well, if you're gonna be so bloody reasonable about it, here's your filter.

>>30761317
Will make it a point to include that.

>>30761358
Wait, you're actually doing it?
Fuck, the next three threads are just going to be one long argument, aren't they? It got unbearable a couple of months ago.

>>30761415
Don't you just fucking love pointless drama and shit flinging?

>>30761415
i suggest anyone who whines even though they were fully able to filter it.... clearly WANTS to whine
so let's just pretend we can't see their posts either, show them how it ought to work

>>30761415
Only if you give our troll (You)'s.

I'll say this as bluntly as possible. There's an extremely dedicated, but extremely obvious troll who's been plaguing the threads for years.
And if satyrs are so much as mentioned outside of satyr general, or inside it actually, he comes screaming out, finding an issue with it and dragging everything around him down with shitposting, pointlessly aggressive posts filled with 3rd grade insults, and blatant samefagging.
Recently, he's taken to directly attacking content creators while insisting totally not one person and that he's not a troll.

He's not hard to spot, because he's about as subtle as Barneyfag, and as determined. Seems to sweep /mlp/ for satyr stuff.
Just report and ignore. Do not actually respond to him for any reason.

>>30761555
I don't want him back here either, so can you please just keep satyr stuff in the satyr threads? We both know lots of anons here will take the bait, and the thread will turn into an utter shitshow.

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>>30761358
I'm not into satyrs, but since you're being so accommodating, and because once upon a time "Fuck Toy Gilda" did things to my dick, I'll give your green a shot.
I can always enable it later.

What would happen if I wrote about Boulder fucking his Statue Sister?

>>30761722
That woud be weird.

>>30761722
>It had been a few hundred thousand years since you'd seen her.
>You settled down in a nice valley, while she'd moved off on some tectonic shift, wild and free.
>But now you'd get to see what your little sis had been doing all these millennia.

>>30755148
Nice post, keep going

>>30761555
How about you keep it in your thread then, we don't want that shit here. The satyr garbage or your shitposter.

>>30761722
How?

>>30761855
They're both carved into erotic sculptures, together.

>>30761877
I guess that could work, did Maud animate them with magic, or is she blushing while assisting them...cope?

>>30762044
No, it's just Maud's Wet Dream

>>30762083
Dawww, Pinkie really is like her sister, always thinking of others...even if they cant actually have sexual characteristics.

<<30761847
>we
Here we go again.
You could always do this >>30761245 my dear summerfriend.

>>30761718
>"Fuck Toy Gilda"

Politely requesting further information.

>>30762203
Old shit.
https://pastebin.com/8b9prAJs

>>30762446
Honestly that is a fantastic piece of wordsmithy. If you emphasized it properly it would definitely feel intentional

>>30761761
>This is Maud's idea of a steamy romance story

>>30762775
>"This one time, at rock camp, I put a rock in my pussy"

>>30761290
But i wants the sexy times with dash now :'(

>>30762833
>"Oh, wait. That was actually Anon's penis. Sometimes I get those two things mixed up."
>"Because his penis is hard."
>"Like a rock."

>>30762899
Dawww, I would love her as much as she wants. And would take great pride in trying to break her emotionless shell through deep vigorous fucking, preferably in every room in the apartment we rent for collage.

>>30762899
>>30762833
Maud is the kind of girl who'd have herself a literal rock dildo.

It took her forever to find the right rock, and quite a bit of effort and time in the rock polisher, to get it smooth and shiny.

Speaking of Pie Sisters, had an idea related to the "make one daughter your wife, while the other stays your daughter" thing a while back.

>Anonymous Pie, recently widowed patriarch of the family.
>Your eldest daughter Limey is famous for her short temper, and her tsundere attitude towards just about everyone besides her mother and you.
>And when she digs her heels in, you'd usually have better luck moving Holder's Boulder with your bare hands, than getting her to change her mind.

>You couldn't deny that you had just been going through the motions of life lately.
>She said her baby sisters, Marble and Pinkie, needed a mom, and that you needed a wife before you went crazy.
>You tried to object that you weren't ready for that. It was too soon to think about trying to find some other woman to bring into the family.
>You weren't prepared for her solution.
>There was no need to go find some stranger, she told you.
>Not when you already had her.

>>30762992
May there be many "rock" hard jokes in coming greens

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>>30751543
>It reminds her of her dad
>She's uncomfortable with how horny that thought makes her

>>30763064
More of these trash ponies when? Rara's mom is a top cute.

>>30762940
And when she'd stare into your eyes and blandly say "I love you," you'll know she means it.

>>30762948
>Anon finds a sparkly rock
>It's the size and shape of a zucchini or a cucumber, but Anon doesn't really make the connection between the rock and a dildo because he's too busy admiring how god damned pretty it looks
>Meets up with Maud while she's out with Pinkie Pie and Pinkie's friends
>Introduces himself as her brother, etc etc
>Presents the rock to Maud, thinking she'll appreciate it.
>"Thank you, Anonymous. I'm going to put this into my vagina."

>>30763203
>spit take

>>30763309
Remember that when in doubt it's probably abandoned and won't ever be finished.

>>30763203
>Pinkie claps and cheers "Yay! Vagina! I have one of those! You like putting things in it too, Maud? Hey did you know Anon has something like that? You should ask him to put it in there!"

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>>30763375
For a second I thought that she meant Anon had a vagina

>>30750465

>Anon cucks his own father
>Pumpkin Cake and Pound Cake are incest babies

>>30763309
How do you accidentally blow your brother?
>"Sorry bud, I was trying to help you tie your shoes, but..."

>>30763582
i believe she was just drunk and acting on instinct
it's not so much
she accidentally blew her brother
as
she blew accidentally her brother

>>30763616
>Drunk sister is still a virgin
>Tries to act like she knows what she's doing when she gives you a blowjob
>Wraps her lips around the head of your cock and literally blows as hard as she can

>>30763624
there aren't girls this dumb are there?

>>30763629
there are

You guys need to see this.

https://derpibooru.org/1515058

>>30763629
Well Anon, the first time MY sister blew me...

>>30763669
He has already posted more like these pics tho. Some threads ago he posted an Imgur link.
Have fun searching.

>>30763669
Now if only that faggot finished the damn story instead of running off, The Pie sisters story being finished would be nice too. Now am angry and I got a boner, damnit.

>>30752254
Jeff? Frosty? Who are you?

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>>30763669
God damn, this is too much. Fluttersis is like my ultimate fetish, and SHE'S NOT EVEN REAL.

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>>30763669
Fluttershy has a VERY vivid imagination.

>>30763636
god bless them

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>>30764195
>tfw you're a broken person who derives emotional fulfillment from familial bonds with fictional characters.
>tfw said familial bonds are incestuous because it just feels more comfortable that way.
It's a terrible feeling.

>>30763625
>Older sister Chrysalis
>Is about 5 years older than Anon, so nobody from his high school knows what she looks like, let alone that he even has a sister at all
>Hangs around with Anon in public places (like the mall) so that she can practice acting in different roles and seeing how convincing and natural she behaves
>Anon is there not only to give his opinion on her acting, but also to function as a prop that she can work with
>Sometimes she dresses up a bit more conservatively and wears makeup to simulate light wrinkles on her face; pretends to be Anon's young aunt and dotes on him embarrassingly
>Other times she'll put on skimpy outfits and style herself to look younger than she is; pretends to be Anon's annoying (and slightly slutty) younger sister, which often earns him disapproving looks from the people who walk by
>One day, one of Anon's friends from school just happens to stumble across Anon while he and Chrysalis are at the mall
>He busts Anon's chops about Chrysalis's presence
>"Is she your girlfriend? Wait, no, I take that back. Who am I talking to, right?"
>Chrysalis takes notice and takes offence to the teasing
>Nobody picks on her little brother except for /her/, damn it!
>Chrysalis stomps over and corrects Anons friend: she isn't his girlfriend; she's his fiance
>Anon and his friend are both equally surprised to hear that
>Chrysalis clings to her brother's arm like a love-sick girl and seamlessly invents a story about how her and Anon's grandparents were best friends
>How they used to have some kind political power and that a marriage between their families would make them both more powerful
>However, that was nearly 70 years ago and that power doesn't exist any more, but the marriage agreement still does
>Chrysalis waxes poetically about how she and Anon are both madly in love with each other and finishes it off with a surprisingly passionate kiss on the cheek
>"Isn't that right, lovebug?"
>Shenanigans ensue

>>30764195
Thinking of making a sequel to your Flutter green after the Celestia/Luna one?

>>30764274
I ended that because I had no more ideas for it, so no. It wouldn't really make much sense anyways, since the best part of that green was the pre-timeskip.
I took some heavy emotional damage while writing that, let me tell you.

>>30764349
So the stories gave you issues?

>>30764256
hehe, i love it

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>>30764451

>>30764256
>"Hey anon, my dear sweet brother, you know what would make this act really convincing~?"
"For the last fucking time, we're not making a sex tape!"

>>30764470
Sorry I just had.

>>30764471
>"Well, people are getting suspicious about the legitimacy of our relationship and we need to do something about it!"
"What people!?"
>"The people I told that we were making a sex tape!"

>>30764256
so is she into dress play in the bedroom?

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>>30764654
>That one time she did a perfect impersonation of William Shatner during sex

>>30764672
That one time she did a perfect impersonation of you during sex.

>>30764693
>That one time she impersonated you so well she managed to convince you that you were her during sex