Satyr Abomination Thread #208: Undead Edition

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>"Such healthy bones!"

>>30032040
king wiggy pls

What does Laika think of regular dogs?

>>30032127
Doesn't much get along with them. They see her territoriality and bark and growl at her.

>>30032084
Prism. All about health and a nice, innocent living. Not /fit/ or over indulgence; moderation and self love.

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>>30032133
>>30032127
She tends to hold a lot of repressed dog like behaviors so she often fights with dogs and hates the dreaded vacuum

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>>30032204
I will now and forever headcanon satyrs retain some aspects of their non human sides mentality.

>pony satyrs sometimes whinny when happy or excited.

>>30032301
Honestly I don't see why they wouldn't do that sort of thing.

Even if it's not innate that's still something most of the population around them do.

>>30032452
Maybe they've got this feeling that their human parts should behave as such.
Maybe they automatically do that raised lip thing like a horse and it looks really goofy on them.

Hey, are there any obscure satyrs that you might want me to know more about?

>>30032806
Gala

>>30032806
Teri

>>30032806
clef

>>30032806
Cobbler

>>30032806
Corriander

>>30032806
Cashmere

>>30032806
Volupia

>>30032806
Lola

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>>30032806
Teri

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>>30032812
>>30032816
>>30032824
>>30032831
>>30032840
>>30032841
>>30032843
>>30032851
Friendo, pls name more than one per post.

>>30032893
That fairy is very scary.

>>30032812
>>30032816
>>30032824
>>30032831
>>30032840
>>30032841
>>30032843
>>30032851
>>30032893

That's great & all, though I was kind of hoping for starting points that were a bit more than like some names & a picture...

>>30032927
Well Teri got the most attention, so let's start there.

I always imagined she was very sheltered growing up as a matter of safety, and would probably heavily stay that way for life.
Most notably, I've long had the headcanon that her father shelled out to build a massive indoor garden just so she could play and explore in relative safety.

>>30033069
How would they deal with all the accidental bug invasions?

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>>30032806
If you mean like adding our own personal head canons? Then sure why not.

These two cuties are Joist and Palette.

Joist (On left) is construction worker who during her off time enjoys reading, a relaxing beer or cocktail at home, and just taking it easy from her back breaking work. More on the shy side she doenst talk much but does form close friendships with her coworkers. Its just harder to get to know her when not having working construction in common and not being close to her often.

Palette is painter and enjoys picking out colors to best match whatever home she is working on. If given free rein anyway, and not told specifically what to paint. Her hobbies are a little more social and loves to go out to bars and clubs to talk with people and get herself out there. When at home she likes to watch TV like anybody else.

The two originally lived in a nearby town before moving to Ponyville. Palette burned a lot of bridges for the two of them when she would drag Joist with her to the bar and string along colts for free drinks and food before flaking out. After a while they did it so often nobody would touch them with a 30 foot pole. After that Palette and Joist moved to Ponyville for a new start and Joist practically held a knife to her throat saying if she ever started blue balling colts again she would kill her. So Palette stays away from stringing along colts now. The two scrape by for a living as the cost of rent and food is burning through their checks. But thankfully there is never a shortage of labor to do. Joist builds and Palette paints. They have a system like that, (and often refer clients to the other. They never suspect a thing)

>>30033069
The garden is a cute head canon. I subscribed to it.

>>30033094
Teri has a makeshift battle armor made of a thimble, an aluminium plated toothpick honed to a razor sharp point, and dixie cup plate chest armor.

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>>30032040
I never really got the whole satyr thing. I just figure that it makes more sense for hybrids to be race specific.

Pegasus + Human = Human with wings.

Unicorn + Human = Human with magic.

Earth Pony + Human = Freakin' strong human.

Pic not related.

>>30033094
Depends on the bugs in question, I suppose.
For the largest part though, probably researching insects harmless to Teri, but predatory towards pests and plants that drive away certain insects, to create a certain ecosystem inside.
Magical wards if such exists and just being careful to keep the place well sealed are also important. Chemicals are only used when absolutely needed, for his little fairy's sake.

>>30033120
Seems a bit odd that they'd be mixed species, but only one side expresses, don't you think?
Maybe sometimes they'd look like one or the other because of the nature of genetic randomness, but most would surely be such that you could tell what they are from afar.

>>30033147
I just think that I am not a fan of a horse with a human face or pretty much any other realistic Human/Pony hybrid. I think we can all admit that that union, however sexy, should not be making babies. There is a good reason why you can't do that in real life. It would be scary as hell.

>>30033174
Friend, I really don't think you're gonna find much here that you'll enjoy.

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>>30033174
That's the beauty of it though. It's fantasy.

>>30033120
That sounds boring & doesn't make sense to me & I don't really get what would be desirable about that setup & premise.

>>30033174
>I just think that I am not a fan of a horse with a human face or pretty much any other realistic Human/Pony hybrid.
They're usually fully human from the waist up.

>I think we can all admit that that union, however sexy, should not be making babies.
Disagreed.

>There is a good reason why you can't do that in real life.
Chromosomes, Jack.

>It would be scary as hell.
Since when does that remotely hinder nature?
Sharks exist. Species of snakes and spiders with venoms so potent they can melt you from the inside exist, as well as a snake with a tail modified to look like a spider. The bottoms of the ocean exist. A species of bug that shoots boiling chemicals out of its ass and a lizard that projectile sprays blood from its eyes both exist. Tarantula hawks and bullet ants exist. Tapeworms, ticks, roaches and bedbugs exist also.

>>30033188
>>30033291
This.
Don't forget that this takes place in Equestria, where beings like griffins, minotaurs and chimeras exists.

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>>30033337
>chimeras
Truly, as cute as they are deadly.

>>30032204
Cute!

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>>30033774
Laika is a cutie.

>>30034197
Do you think Cider and her siblings have a shooting range?

>>30035797
If by shooting range, you mean a table made out of plywood on some cinder blocks that they can plink cans off of with a .22.

>>30035797
Probably. If you were married to Applejack and lived on that farm, wouldn't you create a place where you can at least practice knife throwing every now and then?

>>30035818

>"Hey, Mistake, I'm real sorry to do this, but I don't think you should shoot with us anymore."
"What, why? Is it because my Mosin is too loud?"
>"No, though having the windows on the barn shatter every time you pull the trigger does get a little expensive."
"So what's the problem?"
>"Well to be honest, it's your insistence on fixing the bayonet and charging the target while screaming 'Cyka Blayt' at the top of your lungs whenever you miss a shot. It's scaring the pigs."

>>30035797
Probably not an actual shooting range, but I'm sure the kids would set up some contraption using whatever they can find around the farm - probably empty apple barrels or crates - to use for practicing BB guns and slingshots on.
Sweet Apple Acres seems to be a pretty big area, so it shouldn't be hard to find a place.

>>30035818
>with a .22.
>a .22
>in Equestria

son

>>30036423
What makes you think Tex-Anon wouldn't have had a gun or two with him?

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>>30036423
Even if guns may not exist in Equestria, doesn't mean we can't have a little fun with the thought. Besides, headcanons, son.
Some might headcanon that a few of the humans who ended up in Equestria either carried a firearm or two, or that they know enough about weapons to create flintlock pistols or such.

All this gun talk is making me want a picture of young Yuzu holding a Sig and demanding something be deleted.

>>30036493
Sometime I HC that there's a stable portal complete with customs checkpoints and border security between Earth and Equestria that allows for travel between the two. It adds possibilities for stories of satyr's visiting their relatives on Earth and so on.

The only downside is the vast amount of paperwork you need to fill out in order to be granted a travel visa.

>>30036542
Did anyone save that story where Hope travels to Earth with her dad to visit her grandparents? Would enjoy seeing that posted here again.

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So when do Sapphire and Icarus get to meet their grandparent?

>>30037099
*Prism

>>30037099
>That redundant RD hat
Also how was it? Maybe I should watch it but I fear how bad the show has gotten.

>>30037593
I'm getting my info secondhand, but it sounds like they're trainwrecks. They got like, a shrine to Dash in her old room or something.

Like, they bronzed the diaper she was wearing when she said her first word, and the apple that was the first thing she bit into with her first tooth.

>>30037099
>>30037593
Use spoilers if you plan on talking about the new episode here, guys. It hasn't even been one day since it got released.

>>30037608
That's disturbing, honestly disturbing and I call /sad/ my home.

>>30037586
An armed satyrciety is a polite satyrciety.

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>>30037621
Same, even though I must shamefurry admit such behavior would be pretty hot being directed at anon by his daughter.

>>30037586
>>30037687
What if all the satyrs decided to become pioneers and build their own city in a previously unpopulated (by sapient creatures at least) area?

>>30037711
Satyrville, where everyone's literally family.

Could be a pretty damn comfy place to live, actually.

>>30037732
Probably. For satyrs at least. A town where everything is designed for their kind, unlike everywhere else.

All stores would sell clothes that fit them, and they wouldn't need to worry about doorways being too low.

>>30037732
So long as they don't let in any non satyrs. It's a slippery slope.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=f3Qw5xVn7c0

>>30037744
Aand you imagine that not a single human would think of doing the same because...? And that Ponyville hasn't already adapted a little to humans living there, and that Rarity or other designers can't make clothes that fits them and satyrs in less than a day?

>>30037921
Just good ol' pops.
Who else would read bed time stories and dole out the good girl points, after all?

>>30037732
Someone has already made up a town like that. Anyone remember the "Shooting Stars" CYOA?

>>30032040

I think it's cute that Celestia hooked up with a skeleton. Now they've got a kid that's half skeleton.

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Mal!

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Orbit Sides!

>>30038118
What can I say? She likes being boned

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Any of you guys catch Guardians of three Galaxy 2 yet?

It has such a good message about what family really is. Made me legitimately tear up.

>>30038540
I did, it was great.

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>>30038540
Is it really that good?

>>30039434
Do you like movies that have fatherhood as a main theme?

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>>30039559
I don't know, I actually rarely watch movies. But the ones I do watch and like are generally the pixar style stuff that you could enjoy with your kids anyway. So maybe?

>>30039559
>>30038540
Well that's good. At least it's not destroying relationships or somehow making things worse like any other comic they make now.

>>30039607
What do you mean by that exactly?

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>>30039584
I hope this was a tribute to his dead kid or something, and not that this guy thought it would be a good idea to just tattoo one of his kid's doodles on himself.

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>>30039660
>hoping someones kid is dead because the alternative is kinda cringy.
pyor rood

>>30039628
>Peter Parker and MJ have been seperated because Satan for the past 10 years
>Parker got cucked by Norman when he fucked Gwen Stacy and had his twins
>Hawkeye got divorced and his ex wife lied about the guy she murdered raping her. She was cheating on him with that guy.
>Cap is currently Hydra agent, likely to ruin any relationship he was a father figure for.
>Cyclops is considered Hitler for destroying a cloud that might as well be a floating gas chamber for mutants and currently dead, fracturing the mutants further.
>Inhumans might as well be called Black Bolt gets cucked.
>Guardians of the Galaxy and Marvel Cosmic is a complete mess because of the movies ironically. Almost any relationship that was from DnA's run is destroyed.
>Jessica Jones kidnapped her own child and won't tell Luke Cage where she is.
>Fantastic Four is fractured.

>The only good current comic is a non-main universe where Parker is a Dad, Nova which is getting canceled next issue, and maybe something that doesn't get touched by events.

>>30039702
I mean, I personally like Unbeatable Squirrel Girl.
Which I guess doesn't really get touch that much by events...

That Guardians of the Galaxy example seems to be evidence that the comics shouldn't try too hard to be like the movies.

A little bump before bed.

>>30037586
Is Cider the better gunslinger?

>>30040389
You kidding?
Hope could pop a griffins clit off at 300 meters.

>>30038097
Did it?
It had Halley Yard in it, but her parents were human and pony though.

>>30042172
So... would any of the satyrs like Transformers?

Whether one of the shows or the toys?

>>30042216
Eh, the main appeal to my understanding is the 'turning mundane into supernatural' aspect, but there aren't really any parallels to stuff in Equestria.

A lot of them probably would like them, but mostly because of the 'futuristic stuff' aspect more than the intended one.

>>30040870
Yes, and they lived in a place called Satyrtown or something like that.

>>30042994
I forgot. Been a long time since I read that. Sounds like an interesting premise anyway. A village or city where all or at least most of the population are satyrs. Maybe a few humans too, since they're very similar to satyrs in most ways.

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What would be the driving factor for the satyrs creating their own town?

>>30043572
Family got too big, and it was hard to manage split up all across town.

Move off and form that compound town.

>>30043572
>>30043628
>Creating an entirely new town where only satyrs live for some dumb reason
Can we not do this? This is, like, one step closer to turning this whole thing into Satyrquestria where everything is all about satyrs and ponies don't exist. It's almost like you want nothing to do with MLP.

>>30043642
>and ponies don't exist.
They won't after the genetic assimilation.

>>30043642
>A stupid non serious prompt just for fun means it's going to be set in stone 4eva guise

Yeah can you not be such a knee jerk reactionary? Or will you sperg out for any discussion and claim slippery slope?

>>30043572
A desire for a place to fit in and be normal rather than be looked at like a sideshow by ponies. Stores where they can buy clothes that actually fit instead of having to have them specially tailored - or to be able to run such a store and actually have enough customers to make a profit. Not having to constantly watch out for doorways to avoid hitting their heads on them.

>>30043199
If I remember correctly, then the story or discussion was something like
>Town was founded by a satyr and their family who passed away many years ago
>Was made as a place where all the ponies and humans and griffins who has satyr children can live a more peaceful life together with others who also has satyr kids
I think there was also a statue of the very first satyr in the center square.

>>30043660
>A desire for a place to fit in and be normal rather than be looked at like a sideshow by ponies
>Stores where they can buy clothes that actually fit instead of having to have them specially tailored
>or to be able to run such a store and actually have enough customers to make a profit.
>Not having to constantly watch out for doorways to avoid hitting their heads on them.
I'm going to ask this one more time: Why wouldn't the humans do the exact same thing?

This satyr town idea would be better as a just a section of an existing town

>>30043994
I think it would be better if it was a sort of "We are sick of living in ponytown and their dummy rules, satyrs unite!"

And a large clutch of satyrs get their own land That Darcy is using with AJ's permission to make their own town and live there. Cue collapse of satyr society.

Or maybe because magic spell all the ponies and humans vanish and the satyrs are left behind because they are neither full pony or human. And they have some fun with it while also working to reverse the spell.

>>30043994
>Upper Canterlot is filled with snobby ponies
>The lower part is filled with satyr thieves

>>30044008
>lord satyr of the flies

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>>30044011
>The lower part is filled with satyr thieves

>"Keep your belongings close to you Garret sweetie, there are filthy pony thieves everywhere here."
>"Why are we even here mother?"
>"Because Fluttershy in all her misplaced kindness is volunteering here and I need to get her because she wont walk home alone."
>As he walks past a dark alley he hears a voice call out "Psst, hey you, cutie."
>Garret stops and looks to the dark to see a dimly lit dogyr.
>"M.me?"
>"Yeah, you, why dont you ditch the mare and come with me. I'll show you a good time."
>"Um..uh..thats my mom."
>"Oh, well can you ask mommy if she will let you out to play?"
>"Umm.."
>"Garret, come on now, dont talk to strays. She'll follow us home."
>"Bye, bye Garret~"
>Garret later went back and got mugged. But he did get a kiss out of it.

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>All the satyr stories in the Searchable Archive are gone
Can someone tell me what's going on?

>>30043994
But then you get shit like >>30044011 where they're segregated because pones are often not overly accepting of not-pones.

>>30044123
The fuck?
Damn, they are all gone except curwhibbles.

Maybe there's some shit going on with the servers or some something?

>>30044138
I really, really hope so. I mean, if all the stories we've saved over the years are gone, then I don't know what to do...

>>30044252
Thankfully, I think a good bit is backed up on the dropbox too.

>>30044128
And?

>>30044274
And that gives them an incentive to make their own instead of sitting around and being treated like shit.

>>30044280
There's generally a reason people don't just up and move to bumfuck nowhere and make their own city. Presuming there are no laws in the way (and given the Apples needed to ask Celestia personally for permission to make Sweet Apple Acres, there likely are), there'd be all sorts of infrastructural problems and political gripes to work out first. They'd be better off improving lower Canterlot than starting from scratch.

>>30044138
>>30044259
Stories are back. The one running the site just forgot to update something when he updated the site recently.

>>30044346
still can't post green

>>30044401
>You're here in Ponyville
>Happily married with your waifu
>And you even have a child
>Sure, it's an abomination in most ponies' eyes
>But Who cares?
>It's your child
>One you got right after you lost all hope of ever being able to start a family of your own after ending up in Equestria

>>30044417
Seems to work just fine to me. Unless more green is needed to make it impossible to post?

>>30044297
>there'd be all sorts of infrastructural problems and political gripes to work out first.
That could be a fun short story in itself seeing the different satyrs interact and how they would see themselves playing their role in this new town

Would there be any head butting over who would want to be leader? Who would fight for those positions?

Who would want to be treasurey? And so forth

>>30044584
She's a major cutie. What is back story here? Also that leg spread

>>30044599
Eh, she's just greedy & has a bag of money at that moment.

Marble evidently didn't do the best job of raising good children.

>>30044591
The ones wanting to be treasury are probably the ones who shouldn't be treasury.

>>30044297
>There's generally a reason people don't just up and move to bumfuck nowhere and make their own city.
Yes, because there's usually no point. Not to mention that these days there are already cities everywhere.

People used to do it back in the old days though. I imagine not all of Equestria is populated by civilized beings. Large parts of it are still just wilderness that nobody has taken ownership of.

>>30044026

>Get mugged.
>Have forty Bits stolen.
>Get smooched by sexy lady thief.

Or

>Go on date.
>Pay for everything, spend eighty Bits.
>Will only get smooched if you take lady friend on two more dates.
>If she kisses you before the third date then you know she's confirmed for being a filthy un-virgin and you've just wasted money on her for nothing.

One of these options seems superior to the other.

>>30045074
>Track down sexy lady thief and ask her out on a date

>>30045321
>This ends with Garret becoming a master thief

>>30044259
Well just in case I downloaded the archived stories onto the dropbox.

>>30045473
It would suit him well. He could rule the thieves' guild with Laika.

>>30045480
We can never have too many safety backups. I always save the /sad/ threads in case the archive should ever fail.

>>30045473
I can't help imagining that he'd steal your stuff but also tidy up & organize your place before he left.

>>30045792
>he leaves you an organizational quickguide explaining where everything is an why he sorted it that way
>recommends a set of novels by literally whos about space optimization

>>30045530
But would he steal the skeleton key?

>>30046855
Spooky

>>30046855
Does he need to unlock any skeletons?

>>30046855
>>30047776
I'd stick my skeleton key in >>30032040.

>>30044613
Well still a major cutie regardless. Hope to see more of her, she is cute in this style

>>30044584
I like your artstyle.

Off to work bump.

Slow day bump.

>>30049438
>>30050265
>"Uncle Anon, why are we filling aluminum cans with dirt?"
>'Becaaause, silly, they'll weigh more when we crush them and turn them in at the recycling center and BAM! Cold hard cash money.'
>"You said this day was going to be fun..."
>'Aww c'mon, didn't you have fun when we sold that craigslist guy a stereobox full of rocks?'
>"..Ok, maybe a little."
>'Haha, atta' girl. And to think your mom & dad thought their boring 'list of acceptable acitivities' could stop Cool Uncle 'Non.'

>>30049438
What if your little kid wanted to follow you to your work?

>>30046741
How long until Dagger starts to lose her mind on the trail of the Picky Pilferer?

>>30050298
Show of hands. Who here has a sibling like this who might be a bad influence on your kids?

>>30050346
Not a sibling. I do have a second Uncle who tried to rob a bank even though people from the bank knew who he was. When he stole the money, the things that make ink go everywhere set off. He then went to a walmart to try to himself and the money.

>>30050346
Aw c'mon, it's not my fault my sister and her husband are such uptight fun haters.

>>30050370
>Uncle who tried to rob a bank even though people from the bank knew who he was.
That almost sounds like it could fit in a comedy.

>>30050322
I give her a week.

>>30050440
>"Oh hello again, Mr. Anonymous."
"G-Give me all the money!"
>"ANOTHER total withdrawl, sir? Have you considered setting up a checking account with us?"

>>30050370
We all have a Grunkle Stan in our lives.

>>30050440
I've seen dumber. A while back a few football players for a college I went to tried to rob a gas station. The attendant could tell the guns were fake because they had the huge orange tips on them and knew who they were because it's a football college.

>>30050346
I don't know about bad influence like that, but my brother would insist that they hide their legs 'cause things like satyrs & centaurs freak him out.

>>30050955
Satyrs in giant kilts when?

>>30051512
A dress?

>>30051512
>Reminder that cramped quarters and higher warmth damages the count and quality of your sperm.
>Reminder that the Scottish were right all along.

>>30050313
I work for an airport and it would be impractical given the amount of security clearances she'd need in order to accompany me throughout the day. In and of itself that's not so out of the question, as she could be granted a visitor's ID which would allow her through most publicly accessible areas provided she was accompanied by me at all times and didn't wander off, but the real pain comes with the amount of red tape you need to wade through in order to get even one of those at short notice. Still, she wouldn't be allowed to follow me out onto the airfield or into the ATC tower, which would impede me quite a bit from doing my job.

Maybe I could pawn her off onto one of the girls in HR for the day.

I vaguely recall writing something along these lines for a similar prompt a while back.

>>30051662
Huh. Glad to see you guys are taking your security serious. Don't crash any marshmallows by posting with us here though

>>30051987
I assure you, I'm entirely capable of directing air traffic flawlessly while browsing /mlp/ on my secondary monitor.

>>30051662
>She decides to sneak after you to work
>Barely 20 minutes after you got to your job and started working, you get a call from security
>You need to get over to them right away
>Asking them why, they respond that they caught a young satyr kid walking around cluelessly in a restricted area, and now she's crying and asking for her dad

>>30052297
>Crying for their dad and claiming to be a child.
Typical terrorist trick.

>>30052297
>"Here, ride around on the baggage claim belt."

>>30052329
Can't, it takes you into an area from which you can access the airfield.

>>30052313
Would you do criminal things together with your kid?
>Jump aboard speeding trains and rob the ponies in it
>Stop wagons in the middle of nowhere
>Draw moustaches on all paintings of the Princesses
>Steal a cart filled with cake that was heading to Canterlot and hold it hostage

>>30052551
Criminal, maybe not. Legally questionable, perhaps.
Satyrs have an inherent "Russian" tier lack of fucks regarding their non-aversion to doing batshit stuff.

So... which satyrs would want to enter an arm wrestling contest & who would win?

>>30053435
Ace
Alex
Cider
Candy
Lenora
Petunia

Bucky
Cider (Cross dressing)
Rory (Magic cheater)
Warren
Muddle (Would play casually but not pro league)

>>30053965
>Alex
>Lenora
I want to see these meows going at it.

>>30053965
I didn't think Petunia would have that kind of arm strength.

>>30053965
>Candy
>Petunia
>Lenora
>Implying
Sure, they could enter an arm wrestling contest, but they'd lose sorely unless they're competing against a colt or a filly who is much younger than them.

>>30054437
>>30054109

>Lenora
>Lose easily

She'd be pretty competitive. As for Petunia I thought it'd be cute/lewdish if she actually had pretty good upper body strength from lugging around her massive melons. Just something stupid and non serious. As for Candy it's all fun and games. Oh also I think Salai would be pretty savage.

>>30054517
I have issue with that idea with Petunia, but only because that would strengthen her core & maybe her legs, not her arms.

Sure core strength is always important, but there's a reason champion arm wrestlers in real life tend to have one massive arm.

>>30055318
>That was Cider's first word when she was a baby
>You were hoping that it would be "daddy" or "mommy"
>But "Appuls"?
>Of course, your wife was proud as heck and nearly cried tears of joy
>But you honestly think Applejack has been talking about apples way too much recently
>Ever since she gave birth to Cider actually

Let's say you're married to your favourite pony. Would the two of you sit down and have a serious talk about having a satyr baby before getting on with it? Or would your wife getting pregnant be something that just kinda happened that neither of you really planned for?

>>30055670
Considering horseabort, it'd probably be after a discussion on the subject.

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>>30055670
If satyr's are common knowledge or exist before this then yes a good sit down talk would be needed. Because raising a child is not something thats all fun and games. Its a serious commitment and we would have to plan accordingly.

If there were no satyrs in recorded knowledge then no, there would be no talk. I would be cumming in her raw daily thinking it was going by real world rules.

>>30056825
RIP sock

>>30056825
Just fuck her shit up

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>>30056825
Who rips up the most clothes due to claws, hooves, etc?

>>30056854
Every satyr who has sharp claws. Can't even scratch an itch on their body without accidentally tearing up their shirts.

How much do you think you'd have to spend on new clothes for your kid every month if your child was a sphinx or a drake?

>>30057209
Just make them wear a giant poncho and you slove all your problems.

>>30057209
>Alex really likes those hip huggers she uses for the gym
>2 out of 10 times she always accidentally tears them open when slipping her paws in them
>It's rare but those things are expensive!
>She usually cuts her bra latch off most of the time so she usually just wraps her bitty titties when needed

>>30057340
But cats, and therefore I assume sphinxes, can retract their claws.

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>>30056884
>>30057340

>>30057397
Claws? Yes. Talons? No.

>>30057397
Rectractable claws for sure. But that's why it's so rare because in those rare moments she loses her balance, or gets startled mid slip she whips those claw puppies out and tears some shit up.

>>30057446
>Sneak on on cute sleeping daughteru to blow raspberries on her belly.
>She gets startled and accidentally disembowels you.
>Ded.
All around me are familiar faces...

>>30057463
>Not wearing her protective kitten mittens during bed
You saw the instructional training video anon why didnt you listen!? Why didn't you listen.

>>30056884
>>30057209
That's why satyrs don't like to wear clothes more than they have to. Especially clawed/taloned satyrs. For the winter when it's cold, they could wear thick wool sweaters or a fur coat. Something that keeps their upper body warm and is resistant to tearing.

>>30057536
You say that like some satyrs can't learn to enjoy the cold like a true viking.

>>30057598
Oh, sure they can.
Not for too long though, or they'll get hypothermia.
Maybe a quick ice bath or two.

>>30057609
Hot sauna and an ice bath right after?

>>30057786
Perhaps.

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>>30057598
>>30057609
Well, I guess I have no reason to not post this.

>>30057885
Do you have the one where Alex tries to hug her dad, only to hurt his back with her talons, so he gives her mittens so they can hug each other without any injuries?

File: 571639__semi-dash-grimdark_artist-colon-nobody_oc_oc-colon-alex_oc-colon-anon_blood_comic_cute_eyes+closed_hug_offspring_oven+mitts_pain_parent-colon-g.png (940KB, 1816x1294px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30058411
I don't know why that made you think to ask me for that, but here.

>>30058430
The recent discussion about talons and clothes made me think of that comic. Thought I had it saved, but turns out I didn't have it.

>>30058430
So how much of Alex's gruff exterior is just a front, and how much is for real?

Personally, I always preferred when she had a deep interest in intellectual pursuits.

>>30059305
I go with "she's a total nerd, but was raised to have delinquent manners".

>>30059354
What are her favorite nerd activities? Besides schlicking obviously.

>>30059658
Chess. She's pretty good at it. She often sways her tail when she sees an opening for check mate. It's her tell. As Mason says "If she swings her tail get ready to bail."

>>30057885
She is pretty hot

>>30059658
Wouldn't schlicking with talons hurt?

>>30060793
Catpussy is built to withstand barbed penises. They can handle some talons.

>>30060819
The barbs are just somewhat stiff flesh though, not actual bone or keratin

>Reminder that there was a story where Emma's dad would fingerblast her during heat because her talons prevented self service.

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>>30060841
>Reminder that there was a story where Emma's dad would fingerblast her during heat because her talons prevented self service.
>Emma's dad

>>30061377
Shortcake has friends

>>30061377
>heart pupils
>"w-what was in that tea, man."

>>30044026
>half human half dog satyr
is her mother a canadian?

>>30061462
Could be. Why? Is that some sort of stereotype?

>>30061524
>Is that some sort of stereotype?
pretty much

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Must be sad knowing her daughter grew up to be a fucking dweeb. Next thing you know she'll be laughing at dumb math jokes with Glimmer and swapping retainers with Gibbous.

>>30061524
Bestiality is legal in Canada.

>>30062209
Really? Huh, guess it's slightly better than much of the rest of the world in that regard then.

>>30062238
Maybe, but it still has the massive drawback of being filled with Canadians.

>>30062307
What's wrong with canadians?

>>30062313
Canadians nothing just a bit of bantz if anything. But now it's getting flooded with migrants who will turn it into Canastan. Such a shame I did want to move there one day.

>>30057885
Purity Quartz is a cutie.

>>30062399
>But now it's getting flooded with migrants who will turn it into Canastan.
In other words, it's just like most of the rest of the world?

>>30062434
>Being complicit with migrants and their rape gangs

Go back to Syria Ahmed.

>>30062532
I'm not sure how you reached that conclusion.
I'm not particularly a fan of muslim immigrants.

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>>30053991

>"Hey you, wanna buy some catnip?"
>Alex looked behind her, unsure if the manticore girl was talking to her or somebody following after her.
"Me?"
>Lenora rolled her eyes.
>"Of course you. You want to buy some nip? It's good shit."
>Alex hesitated.
"Oh, well... I really shouldn't. I promised my dad I wouldn't get into that stuff.
>Lenora scoffed.
>"Oh, well then I guess the rumours of you being cool were wrong. I guess you're just a pussy after all."
"Screw off!"
>Lenora grinned.
>"If you were cool then you'd try it."
>Alex hesitated.
"How much?"
"Twenty Bits for enough to keep you sky high all night."

Asha really needs to stop giving Lenora catnip in exchange for her venom.

>>30062655
Tiddies

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>>30062655
Lemme make ya a deal, Dr. Evil

You keep your money, an your mojo

And I'll take that bunny

>>30062669
Cotton's not for sale, only for rent and even then only under strict supervision.

>>30062683
How much to pet___ and hand feed her for an hour.

>>30062655
>Asha really needs to stop giving Lenora catnip in exchange for her venom.
Right, like Zecora would be okay with her daughter handing out drugs.

>>30062714
30 Bits, provided that you stick to the pre-approved petting zones and bring your own carrots.

>>30062748
What she doesn't know can't hurt her.

>>30062796
>Implying Zecora wouldn't find out
>Where does all the catnip go?
>Why does Asha refuse to say where she's getting all that strange venom from?
>And why does she keep sneaking away like that without saying where and why?
>Implying she would ignore all those signs that Asha is up to something bad

And let's not mention Alex's parents.
>Why is Alex acting so weird?

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>>30062865
>Why is Alex acting so weird?
She got clean once a really wild cat nip trip ended in her getting a bun in the oven. Stuff made her too frisky and friendly

>>30062886
>Satyr x Satyr satyr offspring
How about fuck no, and we keep playing with the idea of Alex being a teen instead?

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>>30062188
>Next thing you know she'll be laughing at dumb math jokes with Glimmer and swapping retainers with Gibbous.
How do you imagine they met and became friends?
>While passing by each other in the school corridor, Glimmer notices that Alex is carrying a book in her open bag
>Not a comic book or fitness book, but a really big book that one reads to learn things
>Can it be so that Alex is smarter than she looks?
>Maybe she enjoys chess and science too?
>They could become friends!
>The thought makes Glimmer squeal with joy
>She has to try and get to know Alex more
>But how?
>What if she "accidentally" bumps into her sometimes?

>>30062209
No it's not m8.

>>30062904
Don't be that guy, man

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>>30063056
Its ok Anon, his clear hostility towards topics he doesnt like shows how easily triggered he is and I'd rather not give him an excuse to start shitting and pissing himself and all over this thread for daring to talk about something he arbitrarily doesn't like.

>Pogo walks into the kitchen leaning on his walking stick
>"WHATS FOR BREAKFAST DAD, DAD WHATS FO-
>His stick slips on the tiled floor causing him to fall
>As he's falling, he tries to grab the table
>Yet mistakenly, he knocks the spaghetti you made for him off the table
>After recovering form his fall, he notices the that he made and lets out a bloodcurdling scream
>"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

>>30063056
>>30063114
I'm just saying. OC x OC offsprings is pretty much seen as pure autism in a lot of fandoms. You know it's true.

>>30063125
This.
Your general is getting severely autistic and convoluted in it's ocxoc shipping and resulting oc offspring.

Can we go back to satyrs' parents finding out that their kids are doing drugs or drinking coffee?

>>30063159
I dont know anon, that topic could be seen as autistic to anons who find it triggering and will then screech you down for trying to talk about something. Rather than just ignoring it and letting it fall to the way side.

>>30063208
Yeeah, talking about satyr x satyr's kids is not the same as talking about Anon x pony's kid.
>Being this upset that you have to try and start shit
Why don't you just leave if you're going to be like that?

>>30063237
>you have to try and start shit

>Toss out random idea in the chain of prompts with Alex and Catnip
>Rather than ignoring what he didnt like he replies upset and tells people what they should talk about
>I the one starting shit

How about you and people like you leave instead? Bearnaise the thread would be much better off without your authoritarian content policing

>>30062188
Think any of the other parents are a little ashamed of their kids for some reasons?

>>30063305
Diamond Tiara is greatly disappointed that Cristal is a blank flank.

>>30063305
Marble might be a bit disappointed that she ended raising two jerks.

>>30063296
>Bearnaise the thread
Eh?
>authoritarian content policing
If an idea is dumb, then people will call it what it is.
Learn to understand when an idea is autistic as hell and that almost everyone on /mlp/ hates this general more and more because of said idea.
>>30063130

I don't want everyone to hate us just because you seem to want to remove humans and ponies and focus entirely on satyrs x satyrs and turn this whole thing into Satyrville.
Now just drop it and go talk about porn in /sad/ or something to cool off.

>>30063352
>Marble
Who?

>>30063398
Wait, now I remember.

>>30063508
Is this new?

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>>30063524
Found it on Derpi. Uploaded about five days ago, and I don't remember anyone posting it here.

>>30063547
Neat. Haven't seen this one before either.

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>>30063554
Here's another.

I wonder what happened to that emo ponies thread?

>>30063572
Did they die?

>>30063580
Don't know. They may be alive somewhere, but I haven't seen any threads here for a while.

>>30063395
>then people
>Only 2 or 3 "people" at most
>Most are triggered cry babies
>You decide what is and is not autistic

Yeah no. Youre just a cunt

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>>30063655

I find this satyr talk autistic and don't want the other threads to hate us. Therfore I decree that we no longer talk about anything involving satyrs. Because if you do I will cry and scream and say your ideas are stupid. And stupid ideas need to be shut down. You can trust me because I speak for the people. Now shut down satyr because it's autistic and offensive.

[Spoiler]That is what you sound like you moron.

>>30063698
You captured his essence pretty well there.

>>30063655
>You decide what is and is not autistic
If you actually spent some time in other generals and chatted with other beings, then you would know what the majority in any fandom thinks of OC x OC offsprings.

>>30063806
You really are trying too hard right now and blowing this way out of proportions, making yourself look like a retard in the process. Just stop.

>>30063125
>>30063130
>OC x Canon offspring thread
>Better than OC x OC offsrping
Yeah. No. Don't know what fandom you've been looking at, but got it backwards. We're doing the worse of the two. Every. Day. If you want to get triggered by a lesser kind of oc offspring, that's your problem.

>>30062655
What would it take to get Alex to move to the growing Satyrville?

>>30062975
Proceed.

>>30063928
>Implying there is anything wrong with Anon
>Implying that Anon is on the same level as an oc
>On a board where there are thousands upon thousands of both art and stories about Anon - you - being with ponies
I'm don't think you are fully aware of what you're talking about.

>>30063987
It is on the exact same level. Could b argued worse. A non-canon species self insert hooking up with main characters, secondary characters, etc. Choosing not to recognize it doesn't make it not exist. Like cancer. Not to imply anything is metaphorically is cancer, but quite literally if you don't recognize it won't make it suddenly be cured.

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>>30064004
If you have THIS much of a problem with Anon, then why are you even in this general that is all about the idea of you hooking up with your waifu and having kids together? Just to shitpost?

>>30063970
She never plans to move to a made-up rathole with her mom and dad. They all like it just fine in Ponyville.

>>30063970
>What would it take to get Alex to move to the growing Satyrville?

Probably something like being annoyed with her parents rules and limitations and thinks she can make it out on her own. But like all birds who jump out of the nest before they are ready she landed right on her face.

>>30064082
More like to point out the thing triggering people isn't as bad as the thing they gladly do every time they step into the thread.

See, 30064367, it admits it's trolling to try to prove some sort of asinine non-point.
Now can you faggots stop responding to it?

>>30064367
>Implying
You may think of Anon as an ordinary OC who is no different than all the other OCs out there which is bullshit, but almost nobody else does.
>AiE
>Flutterrape
>Momlestia
>Anonfilly
>Batpony too
>And many more
Why do you think there is so much content in all the threads out there with Anon and ponies? And do you think those generals would have nearly as much content as they do now if they replaced Anon with some random pony with a name?

>>30064295
Well, it is really isolated out there. But at least she won't have to feel judged over liking being stronk and smart. If we're going that route with her parents.
I mean, I figure at this point, the town is more of a small collection of homes in the area, but she could probably have a room to store any books she can scrounge up, and another to toss some weights into and just run the library and gym.

>bump

>>30065602
lump?

>>30066137
>Satyr has teat cancer

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>>30063572
Lack of interesting made the thread on a bump fest and i was the only guy doing content
tho, discord keep the idea alive and i always working on more pics for the emo pones and the 4 satyrs of the thread

>>30063554
>Neat. Haven't seen this one before either.
usually i just post the pics on derpi, here's is something that i did just the other day

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>>30066918
>Lack of interesting made the thread on a bump fest and i was the only guy doing content
Sorry to hear that.
>4
Really? I know of Bella and Hiki. But who are the other two?

Bed bump

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>>30067511
Goodnight.

>Your wife decides to visit her parents while you're at work
>She takes the kids with her so they can meet their grandparents
>How does that day end?

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>>30067650
"It's not justifiable, Bon Bon."
>"But dear. They're...they're my parents."
"And you're Gumdrop's parent. Yet you openly belittled her because you were afraid of disagreeing with them."
>"They would have done the same to me if I hadn't!"
"You're almost 30, Bon Bon, our little Gumdrop's barely 5. Act like an adult."
>"I'm..sorry."
"Apologize to her when she wakes up, not me. I love you Bonny, but I think you should sleep on the couch tonight. Maybe it's time to break the chain of emotional abuse."

>>30067710
Do you think any other satyrs would have racist (or speciesist, rather) grandparents?

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>>30056825

>>30068289
Nice! Did you color this just now?

>>30068289
Is she wearing panties, or is that a human butt?

>>30068295
yes

>>30068297
panties

>>30068304
Very nice!
Maybe with more people coloring we can eventually get every satyr pic colored.

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>>30067838
There have been a few shorts I've done a buddy with Lyra and her hoity toity parents trying to first understand Anon and then the fact they made a halfbreed offspring. Lyra having come from Canterlot must have uppercrust parents. I had an idea for a bit with Hope impressing them with music she could play on her ocarina.

>>30068338
Got links?

>>30068356
Sorry, no, I left him in the Dark World

>>30068338
Just like the pied piper

Led squirrels through the streets

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>>30068356
Nope, no links. But that's not the last you'll hear of it. I'm always thinking on stuff like that.
Recently I've found an old early outline of a thing I'm still working on. I jotted this down in a sketchbook, the poor thing was under some horse magazines in the back of my car.

>>30032040
Is it acceptable to play your lich satyr daughteru's ribcage like a xylophone?

>>30069182

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nd9xha3vk58
>"Dad, stop!"
"Not until you take your calcium supplement."

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>>30069182
Absolutely.
She loves in when daddy rattles her bones.

>>30069220
What about stealing her skull while she sleeps, blindfolding it and then hiding it? Imagine the fun of watching her body stumble about looking for its head.

>"Dad, this isn't funny anymore!"
"Yes it is."
>You hear the distant sound of shattering crockery and assume that her body must have found its way blindly into the kitchen.
>You smirk down at your daughter's skull.
"Hear that? Your getting warmer."
>She groans in annoyance.
>"Take this sack off my head, this isn't fair!"
>You chuckle.
"Nah, that'd make it too easy."
>"Easy? I think I just knocked over a bookcase or something. At least give me a clue where we are."
>You hum thoughtfully for a moment.
"Okay, we're somewhere in the Eastern wing overlooking the rose garden."

>>30069435
Only a few times a year, and only if you don't force her to listen to Spooky Scary Skeletons until she finds it.

>>30068691
kek

>>30068885
>horse magazines
What sort of horse magazines?

>>30069182
If she doesn't mind, sure.

>>30069182
>>30069435
I must admit I love the idea of a cute lich satyr daughteru. Have there ever been any stories about lich satyrs? Or art?

>>30069435
>"Dad, this isn't funny anymore!"
"What, you mean you don't find this extremely humerus?"
>"And stop with the puns!"
"Now there's no need to shout, it's all going tibia 'kay."
>"I said stop!"
"Oh fine, I'll change the subject. So are you going to the Gala this year? I heard you had nobody to go with... Get it? No body."
>"Mom! Dad's being a butt again!"
"I don't know why you're so upset. I head we're having spare ribs for dinner tonight."
>"When my body gets here I'm going to strangle you!"
"No you won't, you don't have the guts."

A little teasing is okay, so long as you don't take it too far.

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>>30069639

>>30069639
>>30069435

>You will never shove your hand in and out of the space between your daughter's fleshless hips.

>"D-Dad, stop."
"What? I'm not touching you."
>"This feels weird."
>You admit, you did feel a slight static-like tingle in you forearm and you fisted the empty air.
"I don't know what you're talking about, sweetie. Is there some rule that says I'm not allowed to put my hand in this specific area of nothingness?"

Was it rape?

>>30069955
>Was it rape?
Nah, just lack of respect for personal space.

>>30069471
Health mags. I wanna get a horse one day. I got these magazines from a local horse farmer, a real nice lady.
But to whom it may concern, I HAVE touched a horse butt and the mare was cool with it. One of these days I'll contemplate riding her. Bareback~ ;3

>>30070189
>One of these days I'll contemplate riding her. Bareback~ ;3
Fist the soup out of her. Trust me man, it's fun.

>>30070189
>tfw had land out in nowhere and was gonna use that for mare fun times
>now the surrounding land is full of Homes and shit Mexicans

Suffering

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>>30070189
>One of these days I'll contemplate riding her. Bareback~ ;3

>>30069955
>>You admit, you did feel a slight static-like tingle in you forearm and you fisted the empty air.
Does she masturbate via oscillating electromagnetic waves? I imagine the total lack of any form of erogenous fleshy bits could make it a little difficult. I'm genuinely curious. Even skeletyrs have needs.

I wonder if her parent's are suspicious about the large selection of electromagnets she keeps under her bed.

>>30070457
She probably masturbates mentally.

File: 1419894__suggestive_artist-colon-heretichesh_oc_oc-colon-anon_oc-colon-dawn_oc+only_alcohol_father+and+daughter_implied+incest_offspring_parent-colon-p.png (37KB, 532x623px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30070457
Dawn is lewd, even after her skelecurse, and has had powerful magnets fastened to all her reserved chairs in the castle.

>>30070508
Wonder if Dawn's father or mother would have a problem with you dating their daughter?

>>30070498
How? Thinking about dicks?

>>30070570
Vividly imagining dicks sliding in and out of her metaphysical vagina until her soul orgasms.

>>30070538
Hard to disapprove of yourself.

>>30070658
Can you not be that guy?

>>30070658
Unless you have MPD and your other personality is a complete douche.

>>30070673
Or you just happen to look a lot like Celestia's husband.
>Whenever you are walking down the streets with Dawn, you have to tell all the ponies who stares at you that you are -not- her dad
>You just happen to look alike

>>30070975
>She saw her mom greet so many ponies the same way she hoenstly thought that's how you be cool

Very hearty kek. And you do a cute Alex. Nice work

File: 722291__safe_artist-colon-dj-dash-black-dash-n-dash-white_oc_oc-colon-alex_oc-colon-pogo_armpits_blushing_offspring_parent-colon-gilda_parent-colon-pin.jpg (542KB, 1106x1168px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30070975
Had a chuckle. Only thing I can say is that I personally think it would be better if Alex had pure white hair instead of the exact same hair her mom has. Makes Alex look less like a satyr version of Gilda and more like her child.

>>30070323
Yes :33

>>30071037
>Vinny
My man. Have not seen ya since the days of AiE

>>30070975
Very nice!

>>30071020
Is this a new color?

>>30070975
Maybe Alex should try again. I think they'd make nice friends. Gibbious give Alex someone to nerd out with, Alex repels those who would gib bully.

>>30071062
>Is this a new color?
No. it is a few years old and it was coloured by the original artist.

>>30070975
>Gibbous with bug tits
Nice.
Also, it's the delivery of yhe question. Comes off yoo violent. Need to learn to be gentle. Demure. Sweet. Qt the very least non-threatening

File: satyr bait color.png (986KB, 1233x1493px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30063678
I colored it.

>>30072013
So, color guy, you the same edit anon that was doing lewd edits, and later delewdings of art a few weeks back?

>>30072047
I sometimes do edits as well, but I think you're thinking of a different edit anon in this case.

>>30072047
The de lewding was fucking gold. I loved it

>>30072064
Alright, was just asking for tagging purposes next image dump.

File: 1113392.jpg (1MB, 2207x3264px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30072013
Can you color this?

>>30072092
Seconding this. Shit was 10/10, especially the Eden pic.

So what's the deal with Icarus anyway?

>>30073403
He's dating Cider and doesn't want to live under his Mom's shadow