Trans Help General #144

How do I hide my large jaw ?

>maybe FtM?
>dream about being a dude
>feels good
>wake up and realize the bitter reality
>fuck
>never liked my body but never hated it
>eating right and working out
>still want to be some 6/10 muscular dude one day
>i don't feel like a person anymore, just a floating personality
>cant swim, dont date, no sex. Too scared to let others see my female body
>life is meaningless and ill probably die before im 30
>happy passing trans people make me jealous as fuck and super dysphoric, i guess

idk if im trans but i just want a fuckton of money so i can get this shit straightened out and finally have a life

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>>8584934

>>8584927
>tfw started browsing around /thg/ #75
>tfw most likely be around for #275

>>8585001
>>8585001
But seriously?

>>8585016
Did you start your transition during that time or are you still questioning?

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>>8585016
>>8585100
>tfw started browsing around 80 and still haven't figured it out yet
>tfw even if I find out I am trans I probably won't even bother with HRT since I'm never going to pass
It's just an exercise in futility that makes me feel like I'm doing something about my issues. At least I can share what knowledge I have with those who seek it.

>>8585176
Nobody other than you can ever know if you're trans or not. And even for you it's an overwhelming question.

It's better to ask yourself what makes you happy or can you live presenting male for the rest of your life.

>>8585243
I know I am, at some level. I just say I don't know because that leaves me with no options. I can't be male and I can't be female. So I say I don't know instead of killing myself. It's like repression but backwards.

>>8584983
Sounds trans to me.

hrtgen is dead so im gonna ask here

ive been on 25mg cypro and 4mg e for 5 months now and i dont cum anything anymore and i have palmable af breasts and very very slowed body hair growth and its already gone down a bit

should i up my e dose to 6mg and what about cypro?

im 110 lbs and 5'2 btw idk if height matters but still

>>8585016
>>8585176

The way it's going lately, we're not even gonna reach #275. The thread is on the verge of dying every night because not enough people post. This format is not gonna survive much longer with the life support it needs (bumping).

And i won't be around here forever either. I should probably upload all the threads somewhere soon.

If you've been browsing /thg/ for that long you honestly have a high chance of being trans. I don't suppose you read all those threads just for fun.

>>8586768
Depends on your hormone levels. If they're in female ranges just keep doing the same dose. If it's below female ranges then up the estradiol dose. Check your levels with a doctor or endo.

>>8584927
I wanted to post the other night but It was pretty full. I don't have much to ask though just shitposting about unbearable anxiety and self hatred. Both fuck me up. I just want help or to feel consoled, but my soul won't let me. Gross inside, gross outside.

>>8584983
I started feeling the same way.
My girlfriend doesn't want me to transition until we're out of our families lives, and watching FtM's and guys go by looking so happy with themselves feels bad man.
Look into insurance, if money's what holding back.

>>8584927
FTM. How can I hide D size chest better? I have an Underworks tank binder, but it makes a lot of fat push up to the top too easily. Is there any way to make that less...evident? It looks ridiculous, I'd rather just wear baggy clothes and suffer.

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>>8587686
I've been here since the creation of the board and /thg/ #1

>tfw still on the fence

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Does anyone know where I can order estradiol valerate for injection online?

It is not sold in my country. Previously I have imported it (progynon depot) through IHP, but I checked their website, and they seem to have discontinued it.

Pls lemme know. Otherwise, I'm going to have to get dr to change my prescription to tablets. I'd prefer not to desu.

>>8587758
Unfortunately, no, that's how binders move your chest. Your best bet is to lose weight. It's easiest to pass anyways with the lowest possible healthy body weight...or being so fat you're an androgynous sphere, but that's just suicide tier

>>8587800
Good point, it looked best when I was 20 pounds lighter.

>>8584927
Is it true that using testosterone not monitored by a doctor can have adverse effects, such as increased estrogen, or vice versa?
I'm new to the concept of hormones, but I don't want to have to take the doctor office route if I don't absolutely have to...

>>8587829
>Is it true that using testosterone not monitored by a doctor can have adverse effects, such as increased estrogen, or vice versa?
Yes.

The concept you need to understand is the hypothalamic-pituitary-gonadal axis. Here's an introduction. There's a lot more to it, but these are the basics.

The hypothalamus produces gonadotropin-releasing hormone (GnRH). GnRH causes the pituitary gland to produce luteinizing hormone (LH). LH causes the ovaries to produce estrogen.

Increased levels of estrogen or testosterone cause the hypothalamus to produce less GnRH. In response, the pituitary gland produces less LH, which causes the ovaries to produce less estrogen. It's a regulatory effect.

If you externally introduce testosterone, it will inhibit the production of GnRH, which leads to less production of estrogen. However, testosterone is metabolized into estrogen by an enzyme called aromatase, so high levels of testosterone will lead to increased estrogen.

So you have to get your testosterone levels right. If there's not enough, it won't sufficiently inhibit the production of estrogen. If there's too much, it will get converted into estrogen.

Hiii… I just began HRT yesterday. My dose (as prescribed by a doctor is) 100mg cypro a day (one in the morning, one in the evening), Estraderm MX 100 patches changed every 3 days and one little tube of DiviGel every evening. The problem is that I'm feeling kind of dizzy, as if I was sick, had a giant hangover or had been running at a long distance the previous day – it's kind of hard to describe this feeling accurately, but it's surely something between these three.
Is this normal? Will this go away? My doctor told me to change the cypro dose to 50mg after a week; maybe I should do it sooner?

>>8588124
I wonder why people don't just take GnRH agonists to kill the pituitary gland and then take hormones on a blank canvas until they can get orchi\total hysto
More like "I wonder why people aren't just given GnRH agonists" because they're not really easy to find on the black market aside from a few sketchy triptorelin sources

>>8588348
100mg is insane much, 50mg is the highest dose you should be taking, for most 25 is enough!
furthermore, cypro has a halflife of 40hours, splitting it up twice daily is nonsense

>>8584927
I am about to order estrogen and antiandrogen from this site https://www.inhousepharmacy.vu/c-88-transgender.aspx I have no prescription. I was thinking of starting with
>estrofem 1mg
>spiractin 25
Im 18 about to go into college does this seem right. I've done my research and these two seem good, I know all the risks, I just want to know if anyone else has used different hormones and what you think would work best.

>tfw being trans is literally the most disgusting thing you could imagine
>I ended up being trans
>hate myself so much for it
>just want to stop existing
>wouldn't pass so transition is pointless
>even looking like I was on HRT is literally the most disgusting thing ever, it's so cringey to seen trannies that have been on HRT
>even though I know it would probably make me feel good to look fem


I can never feel good about wanting to be girly and if I somehow feel good about being girly even though I try to ignore trans stuff I feel like shit because I know I'm disgusting for wanting to be that way.

>can openly talk about trans stuff online like it's nothing
>was able to book appointment at tranny clinic over the phone with no issue
>accidentally came out to friend while drunk last week
>she's 100% supportive but talking about it with someone i'm close to irl just gives me constant 'wtf are you doing abort abort' feels
been doubting immensely since i started talking about it with my friend but i can't tell if there's actual reasons to doubt or if it's just that talking to it with a friend is just like making it that much more real in my mind
like the idea of transitioning is one thing but actually doing it is another
i'm doing intake shit over the phone with the tranny clinic on monday and for now i'm moving ahead like i still want this because i probably need to do it but fuck me the realer this gets the more intimidating it becomes

>>8588429
They're absurdly expensive in the US.

>>8588793
>tfw being trans is literally the most disgusting thing you could imagine
Fight me, bitch.

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since HRT gen is down, I forgot is it advised to start 1 month on AAs alone and only then add E or start both at the same time?

>>8589122
I'm sorry but it is I don't know why I feel like this.

I wish I was a girl but whenever I see a trans person it just makes me cringe but I'm jealous at the same time because I'm too pussy to do anything and sometimes they seem happier than if they just tried to be a guy..

>>8589576
One at a time so you can identify which one is the problem if you have side effects. At least that's what doctors typically do when prescribing HRT.

>>8589745
Is it just hons that you find disgusting or passable transwomen too?

>>8590006
Both, whenever I see pics of "passable" transwomen they don't seem like they pass to me, or it's easy to tell they're trans.

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I went to a LGBTQ party last night, dressed up in a cute top, tight jeans (i ride a motorcycle so i couldn't wear a skirt/dress) i had a bra on and my makeup done up as best as i could. I got CONSTANTLY misgended, people just thought i was gay and there for a hookup (ive been with the same girl for almost 9 years so im not looking for sex, just hoping to have a good time where people don't misgender me) Tried to interact with people, and i had someone ask if i was gay and i told him "Im trans" and instantly started talking about "So you want to be a girl?
oh but you look so good as a boy" and telling me i should just do drag and be gay. I have no problem with people that do drag its just not for me. I hate pretending, even just wearing the bra with cutlets is hard because i know its not me under there, but i really enjoy the feeling i get when i look down and see my body with them and some tight pants. Why would people in the lgbt community be so rude? It really ruined my night after i told him and a few other people that i am trans, they all just used male pronouns for me even after i would gesture that they have made a mistake.... Do other trans people constantly have to fight for validation and for people to use correct pronouns?

Im still new to going out while dressed up, its been 3 months since coming out. Before i have always been too scared to dress nicely or do make up. I feel like the only way people are going to use correct pronouns is if i go way over the top with feminizing myself, ie; doing drag...
picture is the motorcycle i ride. I love this bike because of how fem i look when i ride. I love the incognito feel when i have my helmet and gear on. like no one could possible know what gender i am. ( and it goes really fast) :P i know im fucked up.

Why did my photo get flipped upside down???

>>8590129
>Why would people in the lgbt community be so rude?
Most of them are probably "bi" to get more attention, feel special or whatever. Even if they're gay or lesbian they probably don't know about trans much, most people don't. So the way they act is just ignorance. And because they pretend it can easily make them think that other people are just pretending as well.

I think all of this parading around and making a retard out of yourselves is actually actively harming trans people because it makes it look like it's not a real thing. Actual trans don't want to be seen as trans but as the gender they identify as.

I've had no breast development and hardly any other change after 2 years of HRT. Am I just fucked or doing something wrong?

>>8590518
Some girls are simply small-breasted.
Does your penis still get hard?
Maybe your dosage is off or you are getting sugar-pills instead of actual hormones.

>>8590592
It gets hard just fine, but I don't have morning boners or anything. I got an orchi about 5 months ago and my T was fine before then anyway.

I assume I probably have shitty genetics cause my sister is kinda small, but I didn't even get buds or anything.

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2011/feb/22/frog-deformed-atrazine

Friendly reminder that your condition is a result of chemical pollution.

>>8590733
Didn't know I was a frog.

>>8585100
>>8587686
>>8585176
no i did transition, reading these threads pushed me over the limit, pushing 2 years of HRT now, /thg/ is great

Is it strange that i masturbate, even though i don't really enjoy doing it? I'm also easily sent into upset and angry mindsets without any rhyme or reason, and i have a hard time calming myself down. (I think its just the testosterone in my system) MTF pre everything. Ive fucked up my whole life, and i have what seems like a very shitty, long journey to try and fix it. I have known that there was something wrong with my body ever since i was little. i never liked the clothes that i was aloud to wear. I always envied the girls in my classes. since i was 12 i thought it was too late for me. Feelings of disgust and wrong filled my psyce untill i finallly broke down crying for weeks. I feel so much happier being addressed female but cant get over the fact that for years i tried to shape my image into something that i though i had to be. I hate myself and far too often i feel like the best option is death. I know its wrong and stupid to say suicide is the answer but its the elephant in the room for me, and i cant seem to get it off my mind. so i look at porn instead of spiraling into a dark hole because of the release. Sorry for the rant i have just been having a shitty month.

>>8590129
you went to LGBBQ and you get surprised that half people there are absolutely obtuse about gender and trans problems?

>>8591232
This sounds similar to what Ive been experiencing, I also have high anxiety and very hard time calming down. Trying hard to be a man and fit in and repressing any femininity pretty much made me neurotic on top of being very emotional and sensitive as a child. Depression and selfhate as the follow up.

Fapping takes your mind of your problems and cumming calms you down for a while so there is that.

>>8591337
I wasnt sure what to expect, I was told to go hang out with people that would address me as female by my therapist. I suppose it might have been because the people that were hitting on me were drunk. Why is it surprising that most of the people there were obtuse about gender? it seemed like the perfect place to try and be myself. maybe i'm expecting to much out of some people.

>>8590429 I should have worded that different. when the few people that actually engaged with me asked if i was gay i told them my pronouns not just "i'm trans" I assumed you would have picked up on that. And parading myself around like a retard is incredibly offensive, why would you say that? I don't want to just sit at home and be depressed. I want to go out and dance and have a good time in the clothes that i want to wear and be addressed as female, but i guess i'm to fucking stupid to realize that its my fault. i guess i'm not a real person who is constantly being put down for expressing myself. What do you think i should do then? ride that piece of shit as fast as it goes into a wall? because every time i get on it i have thoughts of how close i am to pulling the trigger, how easy it would be to leave this planet in a body bag. I have already tried to kill myself. Thank you for ruining this day also, ass hole. Why would anyone pretend to be bi to get attention? That makes no sense. You know nothing about me but your trying to make me feel bad about going to a party? WTF is wrong with you? Just because i don't have your experiences means that i'm not an actually trans? I have heard of trans trenders before but i am not doing this to get friends or to be cool. I've lost everything i have ever worked for to come out and start expressing myself.

I want to switch from progynova to some kind of patches

It looks like .2mg/wk (split) is a normal-ish dose..nowhere is a dose as high as 1mg ever suggested

so what's the deal with "Climara Forte 7.6mg" patches? (The only model my supplier currently sells)

Do I cut them into .1mg squares before applying, or what?

>>8591534
>I should have worded that different
>when the few people that actually engaged with me asked if i was gay i told them my pronouns not just "i'm trans"
>I assumed you would have picked up on that
Maybe I should've worded it differently. I didn't mean that YOU were doing these things. My post wasn't meant as an attack towards you.

I meant that more on an overgeneralized perspective the entire LGBT movement is drawing more negative attention towards especially trans people because there are so many trans who go out in public loudly proclaiming they're trans or people who put no effort into passing try to get treated as female and get triggered when they don't. Again not saying you do these things.

>You know nothing about me but your trying to make me feel bad about going to a party? WTF is wrong with you?
In the first half of that post I tried to make you feel better because people can be really ignorant even in the LGBT community.

>>8591534
>Why is it surprising that most of the people there were obtuse about gender? it seemed like the perfect place to try and be myself. maybe i'm expecting to much out of some people.
Because LGB has really nothing to do with the T. T can be any of the other letters but that doesn't mean that cis LGB understand anything about T or care about our struggle.

>>8591682
hmm, good point. thank you. I guess its different when your looking from the outside. I have done so much research on trans people that i just assumed it was common knowledge. The problem seems to be lack of education. (On my part also)

>>8591663
I'm sorry I got so upset, i've just been having a really shtty time recently. I have been having my mom tell me for months now that i'm mistaken, and she is trying to convince me that its just a phase for months now. I got angry and defensive and it was wrong. :( For what its worth i'm sorry. Thank you for your advice.

Where can I order clothing that will not have the item name on the bag? I have really nosy roommates.

>>8591841
I've ordered from Nordstrom/Rack, Macy's, and Long Tall Sally, and none of them list the items on the outside that I've seen.

>>8590030
Most cis people dont know how to identify a passing transgirl as trans though.

How long will it take for Cypro 25mg to shrink my balls?

>>8591841
Aliexpress. It's cheap but the quality of the products is also so-so. Most of the orders I've done have some product names in chinese with some occasional english in them. You could probably ask them to not put english product names on them. Also can't you just make it so that you have to pick up the package in the post office? That way nobody else has to see it.

Would it make sense to get some of my sperm stored in a spermbank before I go on HRT? I'm actually quite conflicted at the thought of not being able to continue my genetic lineage.

>>8584927
So yea i came out 5years ago and got hospitalised for it and repressed, on the verge of attempting suicide and scared to come out again due to past hospitalisation, came out anyway, hospitalised again, wish i had the balls to kill myself.

>>8592724
Exactly how did you get hospitalized for it each time?

What was that experience like?

>>8592747
They dodge the gender issue and say i have schizophrenia, i managed to voice my gender concerns more 2nd time but nothing was done they even said i don't have dysphoria, so is avoiding society/the mirror/wanting to kys not dysphoria?

The experience was traumatic, ontop of that i lost my home and cat and currently living at a pub room, mental health wont even help me find somewhere to live, if these sick fucks didn't intrude on my life i would have a home and my baby would be with me.

Looking for a first month diy regime, maybe they will listen when they realise im going todo it anyway.

>>8588124
Ah, I thought it might have been a management response from the body. Thank you! That was an extremely helpful and informative response.
I wouldn't want to make any assumptions on my levels, so having a doctor help me check and monitor it is probably my best route.

>>8592777
Them digits.

HRT gen is dead so asking here. Legal route is taking forever so about to order from QHI.

4mg progynova, 200mg spiro per day. Does that sound good ? Is there anything else I should know (when and how to take the pills/ foods to avoid) ?
Also can't get blood tests so I'm a bit scared of screwing things up.

>>8592917
Start with a smaller dose. There's probably some full fledged guides on selfmed out there so look those up.

>>8592917
whats progynova? i was thinking of starting on 100mg spiro and 2mg estrogen pill/100mcg patch for a month/untill docs start listening

I feel really depressed. I've gotten tired of repressing (23, knew for sure that I wanted to be a woman since I was like 13) and would like to transition, but unfortunately I am not yet able to be financially independent from my family, who would likely boot me from my home if they knew and since I live in a very red state, I'd probably be shit out of luck in terms of support. This really frustrates me since I feel like I could probably pass very well, as I used to be called m'am or miss frequently when I wasn't actively trying to pass, but I'm being stopped by circumstances. I'm trying to save up and maybe find a better paying job so I can leave, maybe even move to another state, but that may take months or a year and I honestly dunno how to cope with that much time. Any advice on, fuck, how to lessen feeling like this?

>>8593234
Get on the diy before you become a hon and regret it, source future hon i had faith in the health system.

>>8593054
progynova is just another brand for estradiol.

>>8592490
145.76 days
(bump btw)

>>8584927

I am a day away from starting HRT fro mtf, yet I keep repressing to man mode and then snap out of it. I know in my heart I will never be happy unless I transition. I'm just worried about how the world will treat me including family.

Help

>depressed my whole life
>a year or so ago start looking into trans stuff
>couldn't even stomach thinking the actual question 'am i trans'
>few months later finally cave and admit to myself i might be trans
>suicidal episode last fall, dead-certain i'm trans
>basically do nothing with this knowledge for a while and feel sorry for myself
>call tranny clinic in march and get put on waitlist
>basically since march i've been alternating between being pretty certain about it and having lots of doubts
>still depressed about it but while waiting for appointment it kinda just became background noise
>appointment scheduled for next tuesday
>the realization of what i'm about to do is sinking in
>still want to transition but at the same time it kinda feels like i might be able to deal with it without transitioning
>can't tell how much of this is rational fear/doubt, attmetped repression, or something else
please help

>>8596974
transition asap, you'll regret not having done so earlier if you go repression mode.

>>8596974
transitioning as soon as you think you are trans is always the best option, in the case of mtf anyway since you are on sort of a time limit
remember that cis people are not constantly thinking of their gender and if you do, you most likely are not cis

So, I was diagnosed transgender (MtF) 2 years ago and got on hormones about an year ago. I wanted to look like a girl, sound like a girl, live as a girl.

Now, I'm not so sure anymore. I don't know if it's me getting less dysphoria thanks to hormones, my depression medication or because I firmly believe I wouldn't pass even after 5 years of HRT and FFS (6'0, wideish shoulders and generally not that small and girly).

The past few weeks I've been obsessed just being a cute femboy. I'm not sure if I'm just starting to repress or have I finally accepted that being a cute guy would be enough. I want to cut my hair short and dress more boyish. I wouldn't want to stop HRT, because all the good stuff like a more feminine face and less body hair and less aging is nice. Only problem with all that is that well, after HRT, I got small boobs and need to hide them. I'm scared they'll get even bigger and become a real problem.

Is this normal? What should I do? How do I confirm I'd be okay living as a cute guy or that I'm just too cynical to believe I'd pass? I'm not sure either way. I'm scared of talking about this with my doctor, I don't know if they're gonna revoke my acccess to hormones and everything if I intend to go boymode forever.

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>pretty sure i'm trans
>know that I wouldn't pass as female no matter what I do
>no desire to live knowing I can never be a girl, been thinking of suicide for years and probably will end up doing it soon (next few months)

is there anything that will make it better or am i just screwed ?

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Can anyone give me tips on how to find a gender therapist so I can start using hormones? Thank you.

>>8599644
read the OP retard

http://t-vox.org/medical/therapists/therapists-in-the-united-states

http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/prof_search.php

or just google gender therapist and your state.

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After questioning myself for years, i'm finally getting on hrt. But i'm scared of something

I'm really insecure and sometimes i feel like i'm just crazy and thats a phase. But i know i can't fool around because If i start now, i can regret later or something like that, but if i start after 20, it may be too late for any changes and i can't go back in time.

However i'm still scared of not being really trans. I can live as a femboy in hrt without problems, i just don't want to be manly or to have T in my body, but that's the part that scares me the most: What if i regret it or run out of money for hrt?

I really NEED to get on cypro because bica is expensive and spiro has unwanted side-effects. But i'm scared of testicle atrophy. If i get off cypro later and my body doesn't produce T anymore, i'll have to get on T, otherwise i'll have the same problems eunuchs have. Compared with now, where i don't need to take any meds to live, i get really scared of being "crippled" for life or something like that.

>>8599958
cypro will never completely destroy your balls. might take a while, but that T will start after a while.

>>8584927
how does one go about getting an order for an x ray without waiting 3 weeks to see a fucking gp?

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What does it mean if I like my reflection, but I feel disgusting living inside my body?

>>8597907
>revoke my acccess to hormones
It's possible if you have an old fashioned provider, but if you go to a tumblr clinic, just tell them you're nonbinary.

>>8601098
break a leg.

>>8602636
pls respond

>>8604012
You like how you look as a male (might be attractive) but you hate what your body looks like. Probably body dysphoria but not so much your face.

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>>8604710
thank you fren

that makes a lot of sense because I have an androgynous face but a masculine body

[spoiler]I've actually fapped to my own body before because I'm so disconnected from it

>>8598053
I wish I knew. I feel the same way. Not gonna do anything in the next few months, but I don't plan on making it to 30 either.

>>8602636
You need to get fit.

>>8604849
>I've actually fapped to my own body before because I'm so disconnected from it
that's some narcissistic shit man

>>8598053
>know that I wouldn't pass as female no matter what I do
Why do people say this without even having tried. Get on HRT motherfucker.

>>8584927
I've been somewhat questioning for some time now. Lately I've been having gay dreams where I'm dressed as a trap and get fucked by a guy who I have strong feelings for in the dream. My questioning isn't only sexual, as I frequently think about how life in general would be if I were a woman. How fucked am I?

>>8609158
>tfw forgot how slow /lgbt/ can be

>male, 23
>can't walk outside without getting depressed because extremely jealous of women, especially ones in skirts and heels
>read up on many gender bender manga and comics
>fap almost exclusively to tg/trap stuff, wishing I was the one getting tg'd or trapping
>feel disgust and regret when seeing my foot size and the amount of my body hair
>crossdressing sometimes when I get the chance, bras and panties feel "right" when I wear them
>sometimes get few days or even weeks when all above fizzles into nothing and I feel like a normal guy, don't get any crossdressing desires and fap to straight stuff, but then it all comes back at least as strong as it was before

At this point, that's not just a fetish gone too far, is it? I really don't want to admit it, but it's so hard for me to stay in denial anymore.
And even if I accept it for myself, I'll have to stay closeted or repress it anyway, because there is no chance I can afford being openly trans, neither financially nor socially.

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pushed HRT forward another 2 weeks to the 1st of Aug so I can have another think about starting. I'm 36 and idc if I get called hon here just because of my age. I look young and feminine and I know with HRT in a year I could pass.

I love men and women and I'm generally nice to people I meet.

My fears are being abused from strangers randomly during the transition. Im a chef btw. Any tips on dealing with that would be great.

>>8609158
>>8610665
AGP >>8599317

>>8610665

you are trans deep down, you might need to get on your own two feet, move out the area you were from then start to transition

>>8610665
you arent trans so you don't have to worry about any of that, you're an agp straight man

>>8610751
>you are trans deep down
>>8610755
>you arent trans

What happens when people don't understand AGP ^

>>8610762
anon has a clear case of agp and no symptoms of dysphoria, so yeah not trans.

>>8610768
>and no symptoms of dysphoria
You clearly have an agenda here. No-one this retarded is capable of using a keyboard.

>>8610773
I have no agenda idk where this accusation is coming from?
jerking off to trans porn in your mother's underwear is not a symptom of gender dysphoria.

>>8610762

can you fuck off please?

>>8610730
So uh, which part makes me (>>8609158) AGP?

>>8610823
Imagining sex as a trap and life as a woman, and posting here of course.

>>8610823
>gay dreams
>trap
>if I were a woman
you're just a gay man with a fantasy, that doesn't belong in a trans help thread

>>8610841
There's that agenda again.

>>8610848
not playing along with your delusions =/= an agenda
you're a man with agp, get over it dude

>>8610860
t. man with agp himself

>>8610867
>t. an angry straight man with agp and autism

>>8610841
>if I were a woman
I'm not trying to be difficult here, but isn't that the goal of mtf? To be the woman that you feel is within you? Wouldn't thinking that I would feel better and life in general would be better if I presented as female instead of male be an indication I'm trans?

>>8610901
no. a real trans woman knows that they are a woman, they don't want to "become" a woman.

>>8610910
t. a fake trans

>>8610918
trans is not a noun, stupid trender/autist

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>>8610910
>tfw it seems every time I come to /lgbt/ my diagnoses alternates between agp and trans
Although the dreams and growing desire to have relations with men are fairly recent developments. I'll just leave you guys alone then and talk to those niggers over at the agp general.

>>8588784
>I am about to order estrogen and antiandrogen from this site https://www.inhousepharmacy.vu/c-88-transgender.aspx I have no prescription. I was thinking of starting with
>>estrofem 1mg
>>spiractin 25
>Im 18 about to go into college does this seem right. I've done my research and these two seem good, I know all the risks, I just want to know if anyone else has used different hormones and what you think would work best.
25mg spironolactone is way too low. 100 is the minimum. The oestrogen is low too but you know that.

>>8590129
>Why would people in the lgbt community be so rude?
Because T and LGB are fundamentally different and mostly only associated because of politics. They don't intrinsically understand you because they're not intrinsically like you.

Hi, I have horizontal stretch marks onthe sides of my hips and my bum. I've never had these before. I havent gained weight or anything and I'm thin. Is this evidence of fat redistribution and/or hips widening? My periodic measurements don't provide evidence for anything more than maybe like a 0.5 inch increase, but I doubt it. What's the deal?

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I havent been able to see somrone because reasons but ive been asking myself if im a tranny or not. Its been like two years now Im still not sure, is there anything I can ask myself to be sure of this?
For the record I love being called by a female name instead, fantasize about dressing up all girly and get jealous when I see other guys crossdress. Im really scared this is just a stupid long phase and would regret transitioning in the future.

Also how much shit trans people get doesn't help

not trans, but dating a trans girl and having an issue I'm not quite sure how to deal with. I'm cis, and her dysphoria is getting so bad she's made plans to kill herself in a few months. this started when her health insurance got cut off which makes access to hormones a lot harder. she's been referring to herself as a dead girl, dead t-slur, etc. she seems really serious about it and I've been bawling my eyes out. I really want her to get treatment but she's very poor and doesn't have the money. I'm unemployed but have more income potential than she does, and im gonna try my ass off to get a job with good benefits so I can marry her and she can jump on my plan. I feel like that's an insane idea though lol, but I'm deeply scared and desperate, and I love her so so much. I was holding her in my arms last night and she went on forever about how no one has ever held her like I do, and said she wished she could die right then, so at least she dies happy. I, of course, cried my eyes out. I'm not sure what to do, y'all.

>>8615413
>Im really scared this is just a stupid long phase
AGP is no phase.

>>8615457
holy fuck that is awful. try the suicide hotline, they have access to a lot of resources that might help. good luck to you and your gf anon. tell her random dude on the internet said life is worth living.

>>8615470
What is this AGP meme im seeing here all of a sudden. I never saw this shit before.

>>8615470
Stop. Not here. Certainly not here.

>>8615542
I definitely will, and im going to call. Thank you so much.

>>8615575
???

>>8615552
Some of this board thinks one guys theory is fact, while outside of this website and the medical community it is considered a bogus theory. For some reason these people like to shout AGP at every trans person they see, maybe because they won't feel as alone if everyone is the same.

>>8615552
AGP isn't a meme. The people who deny it don't know the first thing about it.

>>8615786
That nigh-every doctor doesn't treat people according to it just means they don't know anything about it, right? Go fuck yourself.

I'm currently 1 year on MtF HRT and I hate my small boobs. What can I do to get rid of them? Binding, baggy clothes yes. I like everything else but I hate having boobs.

How long do I have to wait until I can get them reduced / removed? I don't want boobs, even if I'd pass. I won't pass, so I'm even more eager to just get rid of them.

>>8616401
you don't sound trans to me... maybe you're non-binary?

why did you go on hormones in the first place? you can't pick the changes you want and leave others out...

you could get a mastectomy if you don't like having breasts. and maaaybe you should stop taking female hormones as they could stimulate some breast growth even after the breast tissue has been removed

>>8616435
Why'd I want breasts if I won't pass? As I said, everything else is nice. Non-binary, maybe, but stopping HRT would just make me look like a man.

>Known I'm trans for like four years now
>Bottled it up and became a super beta male
>Finally come to terms with it
>Kinda know where to start
>Research research research
>Still don't know how to find a doctor for HRT

How did you guys find a doctor that wasn't some old curmudgeon? I have no idea where to start looking or who to ask.

>>8616458
If you remove your breasts while they're still in their growing phase and keep doing HRT, there will be a chance of regrowth.

Your argument makes no sense. You want breasts because they confirm your gender identity in a way and because they make you feel more like yourself, not because you want to impress others with your appearance.

>>8616509
Having breasts is not at all important to my identity. Having them or not will not make me feel anymore like myself. Sure, I can FEEL like a girl as much as I wish, but if I don't look like a girl, people will view and treat me as a man.

Looking like a girl would make me feel like a girl. Breasts on a man body? No. That's just delusion. I'm not trying to impress anyone except myself.

>>8616521
You said
> I don't want boobs, even if I'd pass

That's quite far from being indifferent.
And if you ever get FFS and other surgeries, lack of breasts will hurt your chances of passing.

>>8616561
Yes I did, because I don't think they even look that good. A lot of girls have tiny breasts.

>>8616566
>because I don't think they even look that good
1 year in is not that much time for breast growth. Give them time, progesterone and possibly BA.

I apologize if I come off rude, but wanting to get rid off your breasts seems like nothing but a rash decision without any serious consideration of the future.

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I really don't like the idea of becoming sterile or getting boobs, but I want to present as feminine and pass without HRT. Would FFS without HRT be a bad idea?

>>8616656
Yeah, you'll probably regret it when you're older if you're not trans

>>8616656
No reputable surgeon will give ffs to a non trans patient.

>>8617995
Wait, why? This seems silly.

>>8618071

Seems totally reasonable to me. If you're not really trans, don't try to go halfway, this is a terrible idea.

>>8618079
What if someone just wants to look a certain way? This isn't hormones we're talking about. This is cosmetics.

>>8618113

And why do you want these cosmetics ?

Just have facial cosmetic surgery and ask for specific things.

I'm not very knowledgeable, but I think ffs is specifically supposed to fix trans people, not making cis people look more like the other gender for...uncertain reasons, apparently...

>>8618113
Well someone did go to facial team openly says they are not trans it was linked to the hrt femboi thread. So if you pay decent money I guess it doesn't matter they went to facial team on this thread. >>8615972

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I just remembered something that happened long ago, something small and insinificant i guess but as a child i got really confused and angry but couldnt do nothing.

As a kid (6,7 idk) I had to go get the rent for my grandmother.When i was leaving, An old nasty trucker grabbed my ass and said something i couldn't hear. I just remember looking at his face with the deepest anger i had ever felt so far, but i couldn't do nothing since i was scared or something like that. This was the first time i felt weak. I mean this is fucked up, i sincerely hope he died a slowly death.

Anyway, do any of you think that a minor thing like this, subconsciously, could affect my mind and fuck me up? In short, being bullied and sometimes sexually harassed during all life can change someone? Maybe it's the reason i'm posting here right now?

When i remember my life i feel that i want to be a feared person as a form of "revenge on them, and transitioning will bring me the opposite of this and technically they win. But still, transitioning would make me happy so i don't know if this all was caused by my early childhood bad experiences. But if it does, why do i feel like transitioning will make me happy? Do i make sense at least? I'm a bit drunk and feeling bad sorry

>>8619594
I'm sorry that happened to you. Don't let that person harm you further by preventing you from transitioning. THAT would be "letting them win".

>>8619594
>sexually harassed during all life can change someone?
yes
>become trans because of it
no

So I was born male, and I'm not sure if I'm trans or not.

> I have a daily "I hate my life" message I hear in my head
> I remember at a young age saying I should have been female
> I've spent a long time trying to be more male, I work on cars, know woodworking, metal working, I can lift 200+ lbs with ease, I grew out a beard. But the "I should have been female" feeling still persists despite being considered by people who don't know me a "man's man"
> I've told my friends how I feel and they tend to call me by my online screen name which is considered very feminine and it feels nice than hearing my real name.
> everytime someone refers to me as "man, boy, dude, etc" I feel a small amount of anxiety
> I've spent hours before shopping for shoes, dresses, purses and other things normally considered female and imagined how I would look in them
> I tend to be referred to as the mom of my group (dad if they don't know about my dsyphoria)
> I have multiple dreams a week about being female, the last one I had I was staring into a mirror at what appeared to be a female me, and she was happy

I want to go see a therapist soon as I've started to accept this as being part of who I am, but I'm so afraid of everything that comes with it, I don't want to lose my family over these feelings because they are my best friends, but I want to be happy too. And I'm afraid that I'm living my life for other people right now and not myself. I have no idea what to do.

>>8619929
Likely AGP.

>>8619954
>>8619958
epic XD

>>8619958
>getting mad when you're misgendered = deserving to be misgendered

Is spiro really detrimental to breast growth?

Also if I have relatively low testosterone levels should I just get progynova with no AA?

>>8620347
I've heard of people taking only estrogen, yeah, you should get a blood test though, just to make sure your test is low enough.

>>8620347
Spiro is not really made as an anti androgen, its a side effect, so you might get less breast growth with it.

I very much doubt your T is low enough to not need an AA. Unless you've tested that you're intersex, just take an AA.

>>8624721
Should I come out to my parents? What about the rest of my family?

Will they be upset if I don't tell them and they just find out? Because that's the plan I'm going with at the moment

Hello, /lgbt/. I want somewhat feminine looks, mostly i want a girly face and a girly hips with a juicy butt. I don't want to cut off my penis or breasts. Will hormones help me, or should i only concentrate on exercises and face surgery?

>>8625770
*or growing bresats

>>8625770
You say you only want "somewhat" feminine looks, but then proceed to describe stuff that won't happen without estrogen, which is a lot cheaper than facial feminization surgery. You don't have to get genital reconstruction surgery but you won't get what you do want without estrogen, testosterone blockers, laser hair removal and a good skin care regimen, and you can't have diplomatic relations with a chemical - you will grow breasts if you take it.

Does anyone have kaiser permanent in California and have any idea what SRS costs? I've been looking for this answer for the past few hours and have gotten nowhere.

[spoiler]I hate my dick and i want it gone.[/spoiler]

>>8628174
>Does anyone have kaiser permanent in California
Yes!
>and have any idea what SRS costs?
Nope, and none of my doctors do either. It is a mystery to everyone except the guy who hands out the bills, I guess.

>>8628251
Uggghh dammit, it's starting to bother me more and more and i don't want to wait the several more year it will probably take to save up the money :( i just wanna know the price.

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Hello people and things, I need some words of wisdom about taking HRT but going boymode forever to avoid hondom. Here's my thoughts on the effects listed in the brouchure.
>fat redistribution
>softer skin
>lower libido
>body hair thinning
All smiles, this is the good stuff right here.
>reduced muscle
I'm not super hyped about this, but I know I can still have a fair degree of muscle strength with less visibility than with testosterone so this is an overall win. Just have to work harder for it.
>reduced erections
I'm a degenerate AGP transbian or whatever so this is not super good for me either because girls who like boys tend to like PIV. I've done it before and I can do it again - while I don't really care for it I can understand why some women may be upset it's off the table. I know they do still sortof work but it's, well, reduced, and I already ain't got a lot here.
>breast growth
This is the big double edged sword for me. One the one hand I would really love to have them, but on the other I'd really have a hard time explaining them at the poolside, or to my family, who I really do not want to know about any of this.
>testicle shrinking (and infertility)
I don't care about this now, but I don't know how I'll feel in a few decades and I don't have the cash money to freeze semen. I am a genetic catastrophy so as it stands right now I think adopting would be better, but again, forver is a long time.
Any and all help or insight is appreciated, please and think you! Obligatory anime attention getter.

>>8618161
Yeah I think I'll be doing that; I've already gone to Korea to make my eyes and nose girlier

>>8628315
Why do you think you can pick and choose what your like from HRT? Either take it and get the full package or don't take it and be some kind of femboy.

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>>8584927

How do I shave my entire body?
How do I keep hair from growing back, or at least slow it down?
Are there any hormones that you don't need a prescription for?
How do I tie a ponytail?

>>8597907
What kind of doctor exactly? By this point you should just be getting checked up by your endocrinologist (basic physical stuff like blood pressure and little else), not having extensive talks with a therapist or anything. If your access to HRT is still contingent on someone other than your endo (and their 10 minute checkup), then if you need to talk to someone you can be honest with you should go somewhere else.

>>8629166
>epilate
>epilate
>depends on your country
>there are videos on youtube

>>8610786
>jerking off to trans porn in your mother's underwear is not a symptom of gender dysphoria.
And neither is depression or crippling jealousy of women, right?

>>8629255
thanks babe

>>8629258
See >>8626438

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This is what my UPPER arm and shoulders look like a little over a week after shaving. Will laser be successful due to hair color and skin tone? Should I do electrolysis instead? Is there any hope of effectively removing it all or should I just end it all right now before I even start? God this feels so fucking hopeless.

>>8629144
Uhhh, duh? I know all of effects will occur but that doesn't mean I have to like every single one of them to do it.
I've listed the pros and cons, from my perspective, in the hope that someone who had similiar thoughts can help me, or someone with a better understanding of HRT can shine light on something I had overlooked or misunderstood.

>>8629498
It's just hair. How do you think you're going to be able to transition if you're going to kill yourself over some hair? You can shave it every day if you have to, if that sounds like too much work then you are way too lazy to be a woman. Laser can provide permanent hair reduction with your black hair on white skin, and electrolysis can provide permanent hair removal if you would prefer to never ever deal with it again.

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Hey guys, I was hoping I could get some hair advice. My hair is short and my face is long and I feel like my forehead is huge- but I have to do something with what I got now because my hair is a mess. I want to get it professionally styled to something preferable androgynous but I don't know what would look good on a face like this. may I have a pic or two with some ideas I could bring with me?

>>8631220
Your hair is way too short still to style it femininely.