Repression General /rep/

>>8505548
>implying male genetics doesn't always win in the end

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>>8505553

Threadly reminder 99% of you are just girls inside tbqh woman up and take your skittles

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>>8505562
repgen is quite lively

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>>8505567
The whole point I'm repressing and trying to get off hrt is because I'll still be a woman trapped inside a male body

Only I'll be ridiculed and attacked constantly

I never thought id be a repression general regular

Please always stay alive you guys are fun

>>8505572
It's simultaneously the most entertaining and depressing general on the board.

>>8505574
>Get off HRT
But why? This is your chance at happiness.

>>8505580
Hrt unlocked more mental illness and problems none of which I can allocate or solve

Repression was a simple, underlying depression, counteracted by socialisation and substances

>>8505584
No problem is insurmountable. You're just experiencing more things because they're not covered by the all consuming "tbqh I want to die my familias". That's just progress.

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>>8505553

>>8505598
This one always hits me

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>>8505575
camaraderie among men, there's nothing else like it

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>>8505596
I'm intimidated by teenagers as guymode

Younger confident rowdy people really give me the fear

>>8505620
Younger people are more likely to accept you, assuming they're out of high school and such.

>>8505620
W O M A N U P
O
M
A
N
U
P

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>>8505625
I guess it's cause I was bullied in high school

>>8505574
thats some elaborate mental gymnastics
I will never pass, I know that for sure, let alone be a 'woman', but at least I can stop hating my face and can make my appearance more congruent with my self-image

>>8505612
men are cool, I wish I was one for real

>>8505626
I'm able to man up

I had no probelem going outside and not fearing so long as I had repressed my trans and homo feels and had the outward appearance of a grumpy looking straight guy

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>>8505626
I have a super masc job for a twink, kek

>>8505637
>I'm able to man up
NO NOT MAN WOMAN PAY ATTENTION ANONETTE

>>8505646
I'm a big manly looking oaf tho

I'll be a man once I get out of my room.
Repression isn't that bad besides the drinking habits and constant sadness when I'm not being sociable and leaving my house

>>8505584
>Wants to get off HRT.
>Would rather take "substances."

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I've really transed myself by masturbating too much fantasizing I am a girl

and dont tell me to stop! it's the only thing that makes me happy! oh god, you wouldnt believe how good it feels

>>8505854
>drinking habits
>constant sadness
>Repression isn't that bad

>>8505871
Better than getting on skittles and being ridiculed by everyone around me.
I just want to get off this planet at least let me delude myself that it isn't bad.

>>8505553
Best way to repress, anyone know?

>>8505877
leave to another place! I want to move away where no one knows me and live the life I want and then send postcards to my parents when I become a happy girl Im meant to be

>>8505880
If you're new honestly repressing has no easy way.
It's a long ride and it's painful enough for a lot of people to give up.
>>8505884
I live in a pretty small country, there really is no escaping until I'm like 25 and then my time has definitely ran out.

>>8505891
can you go study abroad?

>>8505880
there was a recipe in last thread with forest photo

>>8505894
I don't have the money to study abroad and I'd be afraid they'd be even less accepting, I just don't want to get killed or rejected by everyone like I'm not human

>>8505898
I understand, I live in very intolerant country too, you wont get killed but you will be discriminated a lot, unless you pass - which is out of reach for me
Thats why I dream of fleeing to some cucknada or I dont even know, Thailand lol

>>8505904
I feel like I will never pass and I know the mere suggestion of being trans would get me ridiculed and probably abused by some people especially in this town. The city is more accepting but it'll never be an escape, I'm afraid migrants might try attack me. I'll probably just move to north America if I don't off myself first

>>8505871
>Implying trannies have a better fate
At least we still have our cis privilege

>>8505898
If you're seriously afraid for your physical safety for being trans that could be grounds to claim refugee status.

>>8505598
I cri evri tiem

>>8505870
I too wish to be a qt trap being pounded in all orifices.

Why is it called Repression General when you're all openly faggots and not repressed at all?

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>>8506020
/lgbt/ btfo

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Reminder that your body not only needs Estrogen/Testosterone but other hormones as well.
Get out of your room! Go work out! Yiu'll feel better, I promise!!
Nobody wants a fat blob anyway, tranny or not. And being skinnyfat is just as bad.
Go for a wall, or do some HIIT at home. Don't be like Patchouli-sama!

>>8505553
I really want to be a girl please help. It's getting to the point I kind of want to try even though I doubt I will pass.

GMT anon I'm still waiting for your e-mail ;__;
>>8506320
Wanting to be a girl and passing are two completly different things, anon.
You could shoot for it, and fail. Or maybe succeed! Who knows? Or you could easily embrace your girliness without doing HRT. You'll look like a man, but that's just the outter shell.

If you're a girl inside, you're a girl. Whether you LOOK like a girl or not.

Wear your boy-armor with pride, whether you transition or repress.

>>8506351
Different anon but I hate my boy armor, it makes me feel like shit.

>>8505598
Ouch.

>>8506601
I know is not the best, but it is what we have. Make up a personality for it. Let them "know" each other in your head.

Boy-armor and Lina HATED each other at first, but grew to like each other after some time <3

>>8506619
This is literally what 50yo Susan's hons do my god
Save yourself

>>8506236
So much this exercise and working out literally keeps my life in order.

If I don't go the gym for a month I get depressed and everything goes to shit.

1. Exercise helps me.keep a schedule
2. Encourages me to drink enough water
3. Prevents me from drinking because I don't want to undo my gum efforts
4. Encourages better eating for the same reason
5. Makes me feel like I accomplished something
6. Keeps me excited for tomorrow as everyday I feel like I'm a more improved version of myself than yesterday.

Go to the gym. Get a routine. Enjoy the benfits.

>>8506624
Literally not. Hons go swim with their boy-armors and rust them everywhere. You can either take it off and go sknny dipping or wear it proudly in battle, but taking good care of it as well.

It all boils down to repressing with a coping mechanism or starting HRT asap. I can't do HRT, so it's either this or becoming an hero.

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Dont even worry girl just get on hormones you'll look like me

>>8506643
Don't worry /pol/tard you'll kill yourself one day

https://discord.gg/F2wu7hx

I have sleepless nights with crippling dysphoria and regrets for repressing till 25.
Join my blanchard fan club channel becauze im an attention whore.

>>8506657
fuck blanchard and fuck that bullshit

>>8506660
???

>>8506351
Sorry Lina this is GMT anon hehe I'll email you later <3 My friends and I are going to play some video games for the first time in a while

>>8506649
Naw i have to much to live for

>>8506716
I'm very happy to hear that!! <3 have fun with them!! :D

I gave myself dysphoria.
I used to be a normal man with normal life. I didn't want to be a woman. I didn't hate my male body. I didn't hate my male face. I didn't feel terribly inadequate being this way, living mans life in a male body. But things went wrong, terribly wrong.

>>8506848
how did you do it anon?

>>8506850
Im just a weakminded loser. I lost my job, I lost my gf, I lost selfrespect. I lost a relative (my old grandmother) which made me more depressed.
I failed to get my life together, while all the old friends became successful. I hated myself.

All I could do is sit home, spending time on chans smoking weed. And of course porn. It was the only thing that gave me any joy and escape from my terribly failed life. It didnt happen overnight but gradually I spiraled into all kind of fetish porn, traps, femdom, humiliation etc. I started to self-insert as women but that wasn't enough. Normal porn stopped to exite me. I got no arousal anymore.
I found hypno and all sort of degrading stuff. I hated myself so much that I need to be degraded and I wanted to forget myself so much. Feminization hypno was my escape. To be a submissive girl, a degraded whore - that's the only thing that exited me and let me forget myself. I thought I could stop, I thought it was just for fun.

>>8506926
I came here looking for more fetish fuel, real traps, transsexuals and thier stories. Something I could imagine myself as. I live vicariously through other trans girls. Roleplay, It became my reality. I believed all this. I felt for everyone who had dysphoria for how similar it is to depression. I started to think that Im just like them. When everyone tells you that wanting to be a girl and feeling depressed means you are trans and you read that every day you start to belive it.

I know that all this is not real, its a fantasy I made myself believe, a fetish that became too heavy for me. But there is no way back. I cant be normal again. I need to get therapy and meds. But everyone says there is no cure for AGP. I feel like such an idiot and a failure.
Sorry to all the guys and girls who feel real gender problems and gysphoria.
Nevermid my rambling, Im drunk and feeling shitty, I had to vent.

And if you have any doubts in yourself - run away from this place, seek help from therapists and close people and sort your life out.

>>8506848
>>8506926
>>8506959
>>8507047
Maybe you just uncovered feelings that were there all along. Maybe you felt bad about life because of this.

>>8507047
>run away
>from 4chan

HAHAHAHHAHA if I could do that i'd have been gonzo like half a decade ago. You're preaching to the hellbound.

>>8507068
If you can't run.. fight! I grew tired of this hell half a decade ago. I now roam these lands preaching whatever it is that is the opposite of what most of the vile fuckers here believe.

>>8507057
Iv heard this before and its very convenient to believe it. A coping trick to remove responsibility from myself, a convenient explanation for all my fuckups and mental problem. But no.
People are projecting, you think others are like you. And you are like others. But its not true. I used to be normal, I'm nothing like real transgenders. And you are not like me so don't doubt yourself just because of my story please. You are real girls and Im just a depressed idiot who played with dangerous fantasies.

Iv read some detransition stories too, Im not the only guy who fell for this. So much is wrong with modern life and gender politics, so much bullshit is pushed on us and there is no help for the lost.

Why is bullying repressors so fun?

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>can't sleep at night because all I can think about is what it must be like to be one of those lucky people who have successfully transitioned
>get up and go to work, all I can think about is transitioning
I'm at the point where repression almost seems worse than coming out

So, /repgen/, how is your inner, true self?
Lina express a strong smug exterior, but is really shy and insecure deep down. She flusters while speaking and prefers text over voice or face-to-face.

>>8507112
I know very little about you so obviously I can't say shit for sure. Sorry. Are you getting help with your issues?

where is the /repgen/ discord we should make one

>>8507125
I should but it's not easy, I never dared to spit it all even anonymously, I wouldnt have the guts to reveal it personally to a therapist. I dont know what to do now. Maybe try to mend my life. Maybe I should go and ask help with depression first.

>>8507177
A therapist can help you with both, yeah? Seeing one sounds like a fine idea, fear or not. You seem to know that so that's good.

>>8507195
It's painfully hard to carry this secret, I cant reveal it to any normal people, Im too fake for trans people, Im too depressed and bitter to just join the fetish crowd and indulge in it. I feel so lonely and not belonging anywhere. That's why I keep coming here.

>>8507194
dont bully Lina, shes a fragile girl

>>8507259
Therapists hear weird shit all day. They're thoroughly desensitized. Don't worry about it. Unless you get someone fresh they're probably actually putting effort into feigning surprise. It's their job. No big deal. Go see one. You can do this.

>>8507119
I'm pretty much there with you I wish it happened a few years earlier though

>>8507194
>>8507273
Fight me irl. My knight boy-armor can fuck you up any day of the week.

>>8507268
Thank you ;__;

>>8507273
I'm a femboy i have no interest in being a girl, hon

I feel my test it going up, its not good at all

>>8507273
Yes, that's why we're here

>>8507177
Finding motivation in life can solve a lot of problems

>>8505553
I think I'm just going to tell my parents I'm trans and hope for the best. I don't really have much to lose being a 23 year old NEET shut in.

>>8507758
Try to prepare them like talking on the topic first.

>>8507259
Do you seriously think wishing you were a girl is the craziest shit therapists see regularly?

>>8507758
Do you have any idea how the feel about trans people?

>>8507765
God I really don't know how I would do that. I was hoping to just try to say it and get it over with.

>>8507773
My mom has a gay friend at her work so at the very least she doesn't hate gays. I think it will be fine with my mom no clue about my dad though.

>>8507784
tell them that you friend is trans and is transitioning to a girl

>>8507805
God that would be awkward. I don't know I'm kinda at the point where I don't even care if they hate me over it. So I think if I work up the nerve to do it I'm just going to tell them.

>>8507832
you'd have to explain it anyway

>>8507842
I know but if I randomly went up to them and was like you know so and so is transgender and transitioning to a girl I'm pretty sure they would either know I'm talking about myself or they would just be like why are you telling us.

>>8507854
well they'd think shit like Jenner and get all scared about you and social repercussion

so be ready to explain a lot

>>8506643
>>8506649
kek, anywhere else on this board you get accused of being /pol/ when you tell people *not* to take mones!

>>8507276 >>8507769
Don't really care what they've seen. Its' hard for myself to open up and admit it. It's even hard to admit I have depression and suicidal thoughts.

>>8507863
Yeah it's pretty stressful even thinking about it.

>tfw lost childhood
>tow if only you knew it was possible back then you could have asked to be a girl and it would have happened

>>8507877
so instead show them pictures of Line Trap and what a cute happy girl she has become

>>8507874
It was hard for me too, part of the therapists job is to make it so you can talk about it. When I first went I couldn't fucking say it at all. I couldn't say it to the therapist, or even out loud to myself. But now I'm out to my mom. Write it down and give it to them, they will help you.

>>8507895
Showing pictures of a trans porn star to your parents seems like not so great of an idea anon...

>>8507900
What do you even do? I'd sound like a total ass roleplayer if I just go there
>yo, I want to kill myself also I want to be a girl case I watched too much sissy porn and spent 12 hrs/day on 4chan

I cant write it down

I can hardly look at myself in a mirror now, just a few years years ago when I was still in school I felt normal.
I can't even look at porn without feeling depressed and I'm always thinking about how much happier it'd be if I was a girl and people treated me like it.

Ever since I started questioning (and now repressing) I've been getting better at clocking transgirls. I can't stop it.
I feel jealous of them for being able to be themselves but I don't want to be a hon and would never pass(hence why I repress).

>>8507968
Mhm same, I wish I could just go back in time and tell myself but I probably wouldn't understand when I was younger... I'd never pass now though so just have to carry the weight of this.

>>8507936
You just write down the truth of how you are feeling that's just it
There's a reason why you are on this particular thread right now. Tons of guys watch lots of sissy, feminization, whatever porn and spend all day on 4chan and yet they're not here.
Just write what you feel and think don't filter it, don't worry about how retarded it makes you feel. Don't think just do
Then see a therapist

maybe i should say "fuck this" and get on hrt and keep living as a man? besides boobs can people notice hrt changes in my body after 2 or 3 years?

>>8507951
>I can hardly look at myself in a mirror now, just a few years years ago when I was still in school I felt normal.
What changed for you to develop a female identity?

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>>8508053
I mean I've always had a sense of something being off with being a guy but I just never thought much of it, but then as I got older I'd hear about trans and all and I just guess I felt jealous, I wanted to be a girl... and here I am now, the fact I'm even on this board still gives me some assurance but I doubt myself sometimes and think I'm just crazy.

>>8508033
Do it. If you're truly unpassable nobody will notice, otherwise you can just transition

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epc-Z974eiQ

Repression in a nutshell.

>>8508112
>but I doubt myself sometimes and think I'm just crazy.

Are you me. I wish I had the balls to go into HRT. I'm too scared to lose everything I have as a boy, though...

>>8505553
I want to be a girl and it's making me stressed how do I stop it?

>>8506236
When I work out I get depressed as fuck. I need to exercise to keep in shape, but I feel like I am building this scary monster body.

>>8508206
You do sound an awful lot like me haha.
I don't have the guts to do it as of now, I'm afraid I'd just look like some irreversible monster and ruin my life when I'm still young.
So for now I just think repressing is easier.

Do any of you think people "know" you're a repressing tranny/faggot?

when i go out i feel very paranoid about people looking at me. its almost like they know something is wrong with me. (and that has nothing to do with my clothes, i just wear neutral black jeans with a white-tshirt everyday)

>>8508255
I feel the same, it's just paranoia I think, it just feels like everyone is staring at me when I'm at my worst.
I think they can just tell something is off, but they don't know what, I hope people don't think I'm a madman.

>>8505553
I never come to /lgbt/ what exactly are you guys repressing?

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>>8508112
>>8508206
maybe if we never discovered this place or trans stuff we could have been living a normal life?

and i know how you feel. a normal person wouldn't check this board everytime during years. but i still think that i may just be crazy and easily influenced by this stuff.

but i fear i would end up accepting i really want to be a girl when im older and have no chance anymore to even pass as a androgynoys thing

but at the same time i have fear of losing everything i have and going back to being bullied like in highschool and ending up as a abused person and end up killing myself.

like wtf why am i like this
>>8508225
stop browsing this board, it only makes you feel worse

>>8508274
Various reasons but I think most of them just don't believe they can pass.
Others probably have no acceptance in their community and just repress for their safety.
I fall into both heh.
>>8508284
Sometimes I think that but I'm glad I know earlier so if I do give up on repressing I probably won't be as bad as Jenner or the likes.
I don't want to lose everything either, I'd probably never be accepted by anyone either and my family would hate me because I'm their only son, when i think about that, it's probably easier I just end it all.
But I just have that glimmer of hope, you know? My head is messed up with thoughts, it's only getting worse too.

>>8508247
>>8508284
S-stay strong girls. Repress externally, but not internally. Embrace boy-armor. Embrace fem-mode, but stay away from 'mones unless you're absolutely sure.

>>8508312
I feel the same way, acutally my mind is so messed up i don't actually think about anything anymore and can't concentrate but still feel this bad sensation, knowing what im going through

>>8508320
>Stay strong girls
;-;

i'm trying, but what to do about aging as a male? i don't want this either, i don't want muscles more body hair or getting bald, i don't want my male scent, still i'm so unsure about mones (even if theyre the only thing that can stop this)

what to do when you know T will rape you further and you cant embrace your teenager fem-mode forever?

>>8508143
run, clever boy, or the girl inside will exterminate you

>>8508255
some of my friends thought I was gay
now everyone thinks Im dying or doing drugs

>>8505553
Almost ordered hormones glad I saw this >>8508153 thread and got a reality check

>>8508320
>girls
I nearly cried when I saw that, I'll never be a girl, my very small possibility will pass in a few years and I'll start balding, I should probably consider HRT before that...
>>8508340
I just want it to end, I can only distract myself for a small while but it always comes back. I'm not making life easier by being here but I feel like nobody else understands.

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>>8508366
When reality hits me I always want to just break down and drink some more.

>>8508366
Im sure you've seen trans timelines, would you rather be that depressed mandude on the first photo? or the fresh youthful femboy with nice skin on the ~6 months photo? do you want to throw away your chance to be that happy girl with round cheeks on the ~1,5 year photo?

>>8508320
>but stay away from 'mones unless you're absolutely sure.
>unless you're absolutely sure.
>sure
of what? i'm sure i want to be a girl. i'm sure i'm not one.

>>8508366
if you're really sure that's what you want, you should listen to >>8508409


At least >>8508153 isn't getting any more masculine. and if youre young you can learn what works better with your body features and get even more feminine. After all you have to put effort in this shit. you dont take the pills and magically turn into a girl.

>>8508340
>>8508369
W-we'll get through this ;__; we may be reborn as girls if we endure life as males long enough.
That unironically keeps me going ;__;

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>>8508463
i'll just end up killiing myself desu and endure an eternity in hell if god is real.

>>8508366
Been on hormones for three years look exactly the same desu saving for ffs. I had to get on hormones repression was killing me but now hrt is legitimately killing me my liver is completely fucked.
Probably going to get an orchie cause of that still I have to try cause if I don't I'll wait to long and be a hon instead of a twinkhon.

>>8508463
If I kill myself can I be reborn, anon? I don't know how long I'll last.
>>8508474
I'd like if you didn't kill yourself really, you're a relatable person, also related to the picture, I'm actually listening to gorillaz rn hahah, I wish I was her though, definitely very jealous...

>>8508481
why is your liver fucked? you fucked up the dosage? how old are you btw?

>>8508409
Unless you have great genetics from the start hrt will not change anything. Those timelines we've all seen them but there's like what 20-30 timelines vs the huge amount of hons that don't post timelines so basing your descions around another persons genetics is fucking stupid. Take hrt so that you can stop the damaging typhoon that is testosterone, to help yourself not suffering crippling dysphoria every day tho you will still experience dysphoria but it will be lessened and overtime you may be happy and be one of the lucky ones. The longer the wait the more fucked you are it's ironic your repressing not to be hons but repressing will make you a hon more than anything you remember how bad puberty is wait til second puberty when your looks litteraly detoriate right before your eyes.

>>8508483
yeah you will be reborn as an ftm
the ride never ends

>>8508490
I take a normal dosage 4mgs e 25 Cypro 100mgs progesterone cycled.

I'm not old either I was a chronic drug addict and alcoholic before so it probably contributed word of warning girls drinking themselves to death you can make it impossible to take hrt and have to get an orchie which btw can fuck up srs too. Ah good times.

>>8508349
lmao same here. I guess it's not actually funny but yeah after starting HRT everyone seems to think I'm destroying my body with meth or something. I thought my skin looked pretty healthy and good but everyone else just thinks I'm dying.
When I'm at parties with gay dudes they all seem really interested though so I think it's mostly a situation of people realizing I'm altering my body and they are reacting negatively, because many people react positively to it.
Life just sucks.

>>8508524
That's the most likely scenario if reincarnation is real, so why bother offing myself I guess.

>>8508474
>>8508483
D-don't do it anons. Let's befriend each other and RP as cute girls online. It could work for a while at least...it works for me ;__;

>>8508409
>>8508460
I wish I was a girl, but I don't think trying to transition will make me a girl. Probably wouldn't pass anyways.

>>8508481
Nice those years as an alcoholic are gonna end up fucking me over if I do end up transitioning. The ride never ends.

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>>8508587
I won't, I'll hold myself together.
I'd rather be a real girl than RP though heh...

>>8508547
I havent started anything I just barely eat, have fucked up sleep and never go outside and have depressed look most of the time
people think I have cancer

I wish i transitioned when i was younger insteas of manning up. I hate myself so fucking much. I just want to never have to see another human being ever again. I just want to be alone for the rest of my life. I figure if i keep working hard maybe ill have enough to never have to see another human being ever again.

>>8508654
How young did you decide to man up? How much did you want to be a girl then?

>>8508629
Yeah, me too...rping is good enough, tho desu

>>8508654
I know the feel the one thing I regret the most in life is not transitioning when I was in my teens. I'm fucking 24 now with barely any hope. Also you'll still feel like shit even if you don't have to see other people. I'm a NEET on ssi I rarely see anyone and I still hate life and myself.

>>8508587
I cant RP cute, it seems forced
Id make authentic depressed one

>>8508621
You can get an orchie but don't expect good srs results still orchie>blockers I skateboarded for years I really wish all the times I ate shit on the rails killed my nuts. Avert the damage start now or end up like me desu I was 18 and I repressed it was the stupidest fucking descion ever.

>>8508670
Depressed you is cute too anon <3

>>8508673
Most of the damage is already done I'm 22...

>>8508659
I'm just like >>8508673 I just feel sad, I just want to be able to be a girl and pass. This board makes everything worse, but I can't leave for some reason, idk.

>>8508658
I hate this i wamt to be a girl stuff. Im just a girl. 21 was when i started lifting. I dont want to be a girl but i am on the inside.
Im 26 now so its too late and i look like the hulk

>>8508665
Im not on ssi but im pretty fucking retarded. Cant tie my shoes or swim or drive.cant even lift properly broke my thumb squatting and perm injured my back fucking up my lifts. My teeth are broken i hate my fucking self.

Everyone says im exactly like a girl so i tried to toughen up but im still a girl

>>8508483
I've stopped thinking about this because it really hurts to know i'll never be cute like her

you can get out of this desu if you try. either by repressing while working or taking hrt. just dont do drugs because thats the wrong decision

>>8508587
sorry anon but i cant it doesn't work for me

>>8508621
transition wont make you a girl but can make you look like one and besides having children etc youll at least feel better with your appearance (body dysphormia)

>>8508654
how old are you

>>8508687
>I hate this i wamt to be a girl stuff. Im just a girl.
It's just a different way of conceptualizing oneself.

>>8508697
I hate trannies though. They are just losers and gross people. I never want to be one. I dknt want to be me i hate myself more than anything. Im fucking trapped. Once i get enough money im hopping a train and hopefully starting new. I want to start over with everything thats all i want.

>>8508697
>I hate trannies though. They are just losers and gross people.
Then be a non-gross tranny. You are already a loser anyway.

>>8508710
It was meant for >>8508705

>>8508710
Fuck you im trying. Ill make myself better somehow. Idc this worlds against ne but i dont need you fuck you

>>8508665
>>8508685
>>8508687
omg anons reading this makes me so sad
this thread seems so miserable, what do you have to lose by trying hrt??

obviously there are no guarantees, but I started at 23 and had no hope at the time...but after 7 months I look so much more feminine, I'm finally starting to believe I'll be able to live my life as female

you don't need to tell anyone about going on hrt, you don't need to change the way you dress or act or anything

>>8508705
I unironically went through a period of internalized transphobia and misogyny myself

>>8508685
I started at 23 i feel your pain anon I had the completely naive view that somehow waiting longer would give me more clarity but if anything it ruined everything I remember confessing to a boy that I wanted to be his girlfriend he rejected me as did so many others I came out to I learned to love the closet. I'd say be sure to start now on bicca at least block t don't let it destroy you further.

>>8508692
Mhm, I'd kill to look even half as cute as her, I just want to be a girl that isnt repulsive or a man...
Also I probably won't do drugs, I've dabbled with some stuff but alcohol is the only thing I find acceptable, might just start smoking to get rid of 20 years as a depressed repressor though.

>>8508720
Becayse im 26 and i look like the hulk and im already a fucking meme of a human.


Literally they should just take weak people out instantly with a gun. Nature has a way of weeding out the weak. Natures toying with me slowly with something would just kill me

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>>8508705
>hopping a train and hopefully starting new. I want to start over with everything thats all i want.

I need to do it, I have to reboot my life. stop killing myself and killing time, get a job, see more people, try to be something more than an 'anon'
if some people can live nontransitin but normal lives it should be possible for us too...

we're all gonna make, r-right?

>>8508735
i hope so anon. I hate myself more than anything. Im a freak of nature. Im pathetic. I might as well just go full blown lvl 11 histrionic and make myself a meme and a ton of money than just hide out somewhere once im a millionaire and live away from everyone and every fucking thing.

What's a good way to Repress.
How do I tell people that I am not Trans after having they think I am for nearly 2 years.

What else should I know about repressing?

>>8508720
I'm only 18 and I think I've no way of passing, maybe it's just me beating myself down though, should I bother trying HRT?

>>8508747
Keep on your path. This hell isn't for you.

>>8508751
>18
When I was 18 I thought the same. Looking back I had a lot better chance back then than I do now.

>>8508754
fuck off
i dont care
my life is already hell enough

>>8508751
>just 18
lol
go take your pills kid

>>8508762
If you're new here I suggest just leaving soon before you are a regular mate, it only gets worse.
>>8508759
I guess I might try it out then...

>>8507878
A melancholy feeling to be sure

>>8508747
how wold you repress being a man? do the opposite!

>>8508747
You're detransitioning? Why did you come out and why did you change your mind?

>>8505553
Spent another 12 hours on /lgbt/ contemplating transitioning today. I wish I would just get hit by a car or something.

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>>8508735
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKlOf4ab0LQ

>>8508775
i came out years ago cause i really wanted to transition

now im regretting it due to a whole bunch of factors

here are a few

My voice doesn't pass and no matter how much training i do it doesnt improve

i dont pass

i will never have a relationship

i hate the way my voice sounds, i hate the male voice.

thats just a few

>>8508729
maybe you'll never pass but if you're already at the point of wishing you were dead it seems like its worth a shot
the only reason I started hrt was thinking (knowing) that I was going to kill myself relatively soon if nothing changed

Spartan really disappeared on this thread huh...
>>8508765
I want to but even if I do, what if I can't pass and I'm just stuck with conetits and in case I pretend I am a man, impotence.

>>8508452
Sure you want to risk becoming a hon, or okay with that. I know I'm not ok with that.

>>8508786
I do the same everyday, maybe I'll just come out and have some scumbags kill me, at least I'll get some people thrown in jail and I get to forget about this and everything.

>>8508791
taking hormones isn't a decision to make lightly
its definitely important to consider all the potentials downsides
but at the same time remember that not doing anything is making a decision as well

>>8508725
If you ever find the strenght to, don't drink alcohol too. It's actually one of the worse drugs. It kills you slow. And you risk dying of liver disease or something like that in 20-30 years. What if you find hapiness in the meantime?

I hope i could hug you and say everything is okay.

But please definitely don't smoke. I did for 3 years, i regret every second of it

>>8508786
same, also had the chance to but couldn't do it. it's been many days like this, i just want to die but cant.

>>8508798
i'm not ok with any of my options...

When did this place get so miserable?

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I wanted to eat and go to bed, but Ive been sitting here with you for 4 hrs wallowing in regrets about my existence.
But it's ok. It really feels less desperate when you know you are not alone. Thanks to all of you, take care.

>>8508816
When the trannies drove everyone away.

>>8508806
That's true... It's definitely not a small choice to make but I have to make a certain choice eventually...
>>8508813
I am not a massive drinker, I just get drunk and sit around feeling bad heh... I wouldn't like to die of cancer but being taken off this planet would be great.
I know smoking would be bad but I've tried it and desu it is surprisingly nice, but I shouldn't be thinking that so I just don't let myself anymore.
I really do hope everything will be okay though.

>>8508815
Escape into your fantasies. Inside your head you get to be a cute girl...
Th-that's good enough r-right?

>>8508818
I wallow in regret about my existence here much more, but yeah I'm glad I am not alone.
Have a good rest, anon.

>>8508819
???

>>8508791
>what if I can't pass and I'm just stuck with conetits and in case I pretend I am a man, impotence.
Everything you do has risks and downsides. You can take into account that detransition rates are super super low, but ultimately you have to take into account your own life circumstances as well. I hope you don't regret whatever choice you make be it taking them or not.

How do you deal with jealousy of passing trans girls?

Sometimes I feel like I envy passing trans girls even more than cis girls, which is pretty crazy

>>8508834
it's all there is left...

>>8508842
>Sometimes I feel like I envy passing trans girls even more than cis girls, which is pretty crazy
It's not that strange. You never had any chance of being a girl, you couldn't help it. But you could have been a passing transgirl if you started transitioning before puberty. You had a chance and bad luck / bad decisions fucked you over.

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I'm gonna go try get to sleep now aka sit in bed and feel shit.
I hope you guys figure a way out of these shitty feelings whether you break and get onto HRT or not.

>>8508587
>>8508659
What kind of RP do you do?

>>8508853
Yeah that makes sense. The squandered opportunity is more painful than something that was never within my control

>>8508831
>It's definitely not a small choice to make but I have to make a certain choice eventually
my point was that as you continue to NOT take hormones, you are making a choice to be male and have testosterone have greater and greater effects on your body
whether or not you take hrt you're constantly making a choice about your body/life

I hope that makes sense

>>8508845
I feel you anon ;__; hang in there

>>8508872
Any kind from ERP to just nonsense rp in any mmorpg. I just like to pretend that i'm a happy, succesful cis female with a loving and caring family ;___;

>>8508816
This is /repgen/ after all

>>8508818
>>8508865
I hope you rest well anons, take care

>>8508915
I never did anything like that tfw cant be a girl even oline

>>8508941
I can help you, anon

>>8508915
It's a nice fantasy. What's your fantasy life like? What's your ERP like?

>>8508901
>>8508831
This is the reasoning that ended my repression.
Every day you choose to either become more masculine or more feminine. Taking hormones is no more an active decision than not taking hormones.

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>>8508842
I feel that pretty strongly even cute passing traps not even on hormones make me feel envy. Sadly nothing I can do can change the shitty cards I was dealt so I'm hoping ffs helps it probably won't tho and I'll be no longer treating my liver problem and just let myself die at 30 my parents probably won't let that happen I'll move to a monastery or something and die while pepearing myself for the next life here's hoping I get a better roll this time. Agp, trans and unpassing its like I hit the lottery of suffering.

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Anyone else feel like they don't want to live? i mean, i don't see any reason to be alive after i'm 30. Life doesn't have meaning, i don't want to have sex, i don't want to deal with side effects of drugs so i never do them, and i feel like i don't want to do anything at life. I can't find anything i'd like to do or work with.

Maybe that's related to being trans but idk, i'm not sure about that and i feel like if i transition i'll be condemn myself to lose everything i have and/or die earlier bc of violence/liver problems/realizing i've made the wrong choice.

I still want to live but i don't see reason to. I don't have ambition and i'm confused about sexuality AND gender.

>>8508962
In it, I'm a 20 year old going through college, living alone in an apartment downtown. My parents aren't divorced, love eah other and love and care for me, instead of abandoning and abusing me. Also, I'm a girl who tries to be friendly but is too clumsy, awkward and shy.

ERP usually involves me getting a bit too tipsy and advancing/letting others advance on me.

>>8508952
Really? I'd love to try. but Im really shy

>>8509193
We can chat if you want, but I don't want to hoard the thread. Mail me if you want, anon! No pressure.
[email protected]

>>8509045
It's bad yeah, but there is always something to hang on to, to distract yourself. Sometimes usually during the winter/ early spring it becomes unbearable, I guess I survived on BPD alone since I can cry myslef out and then have a moment joy. The grey dull depression when you feel nothing is the worst.
Sorry I wouldnt know how to help you, Im barely hanging on myself

>>8509252
What do you propose a cure for? Dysphoria? AGP? Transitioning?
How would you go about that cure?

>>8509268
Don't be silly, anon. She didn't invade anything. He doesn't exist. She's wearing "him" aa a boy-armor. Accept this and let her take control.

>>8509283
I agree. But transitioning and HRT ARE cures for it, anon. But as any cure, they aren't suited for everyone. I consider myself a girl inside a mans body.
>@
That symbol represents me perfectly. Lina's still in controll. Mentally, I'm female. Socially and biochemically i'm male. I'll keep at it like this. HRT would only hurt me in the long run. I can't ruin my boy-armor...


>>8509296
No mind games, anon. We are the same. Embraxe masculinity and testosterone. But aknowledge the girl withing, or it'll be harder. Trust me, it will. Accept you're a girl in a man's body, and accept that it won't go away. Now, accepting this, embrace testosterone and masculinity, not as a prison, but as a protective shell. Take up your sword and shield. Become her knight. Protect her. She can't live on her own, but don't trap her either, or you'll end up hating yourself.
This is for her own good. This is for your OWN good. Accept the mably exterior, but don't deny the girly interior.

>>8509296
There is a strong difference between someone who want to be a girl in order to escape their own flaws, and truly feeling like a girl (often since you're a kid).
The former will kill himself once he'll see nothing changed (it sometime takes years after transition)
The second will probably live a happy life, even if he/she's ugly.

>>8509350
Pretty interesting but what are your sources for this statement :
>Transitioning and HRT DO NOT CURE AGP/Trans/Dysphoria.

>>8509252
Now the curefag put his trip...

Don't feed the repressing troll girls.

>>8509350
"""Pretending""" to be a girl online helps me cope with it. Part of me screams "I'M A GIRL" but another colder, more rational one yells back: "You have a penis, girls don't have penises."
Accepting my girliness, even if just from a societal/sexist standpoint helps me cope with this internal dichotomy.

>>8509368
She's not evil. She's alone and scared. Try reaching out to her, honey. Don't allow her to take over or get you into HRT, but help her out. Or let Lina talk to her. I can tell you're in pain. I can help you, without hurting your pride or your masculinity.

>>8509368
>She is evil, and I will destroy her!

Trying to kill an alter is impossible unless you kill yourself.
The best you can hope to do is to somehow integrate her into your dominant personality without letting her take control.
As long as you repress her, she will just continue to sneak out when you're not vigilant, like when you're drunk or asleep, so it is better to try and placate her and give her room to breath than to try and suffocate her.
She is, after all, you and you are her.
You're fighting yourself.
And it would be funny to watch if it weren't so sad.

>>8509385
What's a detransitioner ?
What do you think of trans mtf people ? Shouldn't they accept that masculinity can take different shapes ? That masculinity is not only ONE model ? Why thinking becoming a girl will solve their problem ? Aren't they fleeing instead ? If they are really progressist, they should know that girls and men don't really have many differences outside of physical matter.

>>8509420
Can I mail you to some throwaway account or something? I'd like to speak in private with you, if that's okay.

>>8509459
It's alright. I just wanted to avoid clogging the thread.
You said "us" up there. Do you suffer dysphoria too? You tried to transition? What's your personal experience, if I may ask?


>>8509469
Meet her halfway. Wear a pair of panties for a day, dye your hair, do your nails. Even if you do this alone at home. She'll be more flexible after that.

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>>8509459
>monitored not to my liking
>not realizing that 4chan is an FBI honeypot

kek

>>8509509
Your call, my "man". You won't accept this overnight. But I hope my words will help you cope with things, if you end up needing it. I feel for her, I was the same.

>>8509469
She is your Anima and is born of the years of suppression.

Jung is right on a great many things. Your anima is furious and is attempting to force you to accept her. Continuing to fight her will only strengthen her (what you think about, you bring about) until she becomes strong enough to kill you (subsume your desired male identity, aka the AGP Hon). Also, the only way to kill her is to kill yourself. She's an integral part of all personalities.

The only way to calm her is to acknowledge your faults and failures, accept her honestly and wholeheartedly, and ~plan for her place in your life in the future~ (best expressed through women who personify the traits she herself has).

Alternately you can give in now before she's so violent and try to live a better life, but society won't be happy that you made them uncomfortable in their daily scripts.

Why does this place exist?
You lot don't even help people who want to repress.

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Drinking again but i think it's worth it for a "last time", I'm waiting for approval from the drugstore. burocracy sucks

I'll try them for at least 6 months, if i do feel better i'll stay with them and live in boymode. Maybe i end up passing and decide i want to live as a "girl" instead of a femboy, but first things first.

If i decide to stop them, no harm have been done. It may sound ridiculous but if i don't get any more masculine, even if it's only for 6 months, i WILL feel better with myself. I can't repress but i don't know what i want, so why not try it. It's not worse than the time i tried weed or alcohol/cigars. They are bad drugs that are going to kill me and nothing more. HRT will help me make some important decisions in life.

Sometimes i feel like i would like to have a life going on parties and binges, doing heavy drugs and waking up at the hospital everytime. But this is just long-term suicide. This is not a happy life. It's more of a repression method, i think. This is my mind trying to fool me into death because i'm too pussy to go to my cousin, buy a gun and shoot myself in the head.

My parents probably already noticed it all. There's always a bottle of really cheap alcohol here. I've tried to man up, i even let it grow a disgusting terrible beard so my long hair would look "natural" but to looking at myself in the mirror everyday makes me want to die. I can't repress these feels i think.

Even my daydreams are fading... The cute, delicate and kind people i see in them. She is slowly embracing me.

>>8509561
Anon...I almost lost my girlfriend because of Lina being too adamant on HRT and me trying tp supress her. I ended up accepting her and getting ready for miserable hon life.

You think she ended it then and there? No. She went back in, on her own. She accepted manhood as a shell, and continues to live on inside of me. She just needed tk be aknowledged. The same probably goes for you.
What >>8509553 said is absolutely correct. You don't have to reply here anymore about this. You just have to sit and think. I know you'll get through this <3 best wishes for you. I'm here whenever you need me.

Do lowkey girly stuff, but tell her you're doing it for her. Let her take a breather every now and then. What does she like? Let her indulge in that. I doubt she's just a HRT-bot.

>>8509605
Why not? If you are truly nihilistic, how come that manliness, pride, and girliness matter at all?

>>8509605
dude, maybe lay off the bong for a bit

I will buy you girls hormones jesus, you fucking need them

>>8509647
desu i'll give you my address if you promise to ship me skittles or kidnap and rape me

>>8509654
Can I come and castrate you? Promise it will be sterile and won't affect your future SRS

>>8509660
nope, I'm gonna freeze my sperm and impregnate all of the white bitchy friends you knew in high school that decided to sell their eggs solely because I know it offends your perverted ideas of darwinism and no other reason.

Enjoy my tainted genes infecting your idea of a perfect humanity faggot!

>>8509647
I don't want hormones. I'm too scared to take them. J-just let me heal you. Or even tank for you.

>>8509445
I agree with you, but you agree this debate is still blurry don't you ? What bother me is that most trans people and lgbt in general give their advices and always the same "You're a trans, you just repressing yourself" instead of "Maybe fantasizing on being a girl is a way to flee from something, and you should fix what makes you flee instead of embracing your unusual behaviour"

>>8509660
But that's a lie :/ it will definitely affect srs and after seeing suporn is retiring it pointless anyways right.

I wonder how long it will take for my liver to die? I hope it's incredibly painful it's the death I deserve before I go to hell for a failure of a man and dreadful sluttyness I displayed in life.

>>8509698
Advocating nofap is not not taking a position

[citation that nofap does anything, anything at all]

>>8509741
>personally feel NoFap has many benefits

[citation that nofap does anything, anything at all]

>>8509761
>Opinions don't need citations

[citation needed]

[citation that nofap does anything, anything at all]

For someone interested in empiricism you sure seem disinterested in empiricism when it comes to your personal life! Is the cult of Kek worth it?

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>>8509809
>his pride!

yaaaaaas!

>>8509761
In my opinion, abstinence is just avoiding the problem. If you suffer from AGP since only a few years (not childhood) and it brings a conflict with your ideal or your life's goal, you'll cure that with the right social environment, developping self awareness and confidence.
Self awareness must be subconscious, you have to stop deluding yourself whenever you're aroused.
Confidence is to accept yourself as a man, and that you can be comfortable as a man ; and not thinking that becoming a girl will bring you the relief you seek from your fears and your flaws.
A good social environment will help with confidence (success too), nothing is more precious than being valued by your friends and relatives, because it's what drive us since we're born : acceptance, finding value in other people's eyes.
Of course none of this is easy, but you can easily understand why some people become suicidal and crazy when staying alone in their house, dwelling on /lgbt/ and forums, roleplaying as girls and convincing themselves they have to be girls to live their life to its full extend.

Keep in mind what I say don't apply to people who suffer from agp since childhood, their problem is much more complicated, and even experts don't have any definitive answers on this. Some make the transition and live happily after

I think I won't pass, but I also think I won't care if I'm going to be some scary monster remix of being neither male nor female.
It's either going for that, trying my 'luck' in dearth of happiness or suicide. Why should I kill myself tho if I can first tory to change everything possible.
After all that if I'm still not happy I can still suicide.

>>8508720
>what do you have to lose by trying hrt?
Unless I quickly manage to perfectly fit in as a cis girl, transitioning and/or coming out is basically a complete social suicide. Because of my country, I'd quickly lose the remaining friends I have and no workplace would want to have a tranny. I cannot afford that.
That's not even counting the fact that I'm a lazy overweight idiot who doesn't even have energy to shave the fucking beard more than once a week, so even if I could technically win the hrt lottery (which I most likely can't anyway), I'd look even worse as the result.

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>>8509857
Go for it desu, i feel the same as you.

And don't worry. You won't look like a "freak monster" out of nowhere. if you present in boymode youl'll look like a feminine boy, with gyno if you get boobs. people won't bully you and you can take your time (like 1 or 2 years) experimenting what works better with your body. If you're not passable before, you can discover what makes you passable (bangs, shaping your eyebrows, etc)

I'd say if that's your choice, go for it. If you still want to die after all you can consider options but don't do it before you try.

Good luck

>>8509865
Right? That's my thoughts exactly.
I had the same thoughts as many on here. I had a mental breakdown, said fuck it. Told my parents about it while crying on the phone being a complete mess and then I moved into a the main city of my country, got a therapist and now I got my mones and I'm kinda a lot happier than I was before.
It just feels like I'm making progress.

Thanks for your encouragement o/

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>>8509872
Thank you too for actually helping me to don't give up too

good luck for us o/

>>8509712
he's still doing surgeries until the end of 2019, just keep looking at the calendar for more dates to come up

>>8509857
have you tired just improving yourself and being a cis guy, even a feminine one?
and you could always cross dress if you want to present girlmode which is a standard before going on mones in europe

>tfw gay
>tfw no l4d2 bf

>>8508255
>Do any of you think people "know" you're a repressing tranny/faggot?
In high school and even earlier *everybody* thought I was some kind of faggot/sissy. I would always deny it and I never did any gay stuff, but my behavior was too effeminate. I tried to be more masculine in junior/high school but it didn't work. My mannerisms were too feminine I think. Now I'm a full-blown tranny.

>>8510051
Yeah, repressing didn't help me.
I was doing sports, started going out more, tried to repress it.
Everything went downhill tho. I had a rather decent build, not too flabby not fat just normal, had my job which I was happy with it.
I tried supressing my feelings, which made me numb to everything after a few years.
It's not that I could not live a life as a male. My life wasn't bad, it just wasn't mine.
I felt trapped inside this 'happy bubble' of lies. Outwards I always showed everything was fine, I thought it was a phase. I thought if I could hold on one more day everything would get better.
My life felt like a personal nightmare. It got harder and harder to act like 'normal'.
The depression was gnawing at me for years and finally Apathy hit me hard. I was completely numb. I felt nothing.

I think if my dad didn't accept me when I told him everything during my meltdown, I would have killed myself.
I live in Europe acted I don't know about those so called standarts.

>>8509862
>lazy overweight idiot
Work on losing weight. It's true that if you're too heavy your chances of looking good are slim. Try to get motivated, get that weight off, and see how you feel then.

>>8510051
Also, I won't go full out girl mode if I won't pass, I will just stay in boy mode for the rest of my life I guess? I hope I'll be happier with that tho.
I would look like a man in a dress which would be absolutely horrifying for me.
Standards change. There is no need for the 'reallife' test anymore. It would be worse to walk around in a dress looking like a man for a year before being allowed to take hormones. That rule was completely crap and they changed it.

Think about it. You have bad dysphoria and then you will get reminded of it every time you have to wear female clothes and makeup. I wouldn't be able to do that I'm sorry..

I've spent a lot of my life hurting people for fun online and irl.

Im going to try to live a life of love compassion and goodness. Only reason i don't is because it always gets beaten out of me by life and by lovers.


Whatever i was always against love and happyness but ill try to strive for it.


Ill leave this general alone.

>>8510164
>it always gets beaten out of me by life and by lovers.
How?

>>8510164
Just start by treating yourself well anon.
And then treat others like you want to get treated.
It won't always be easy, but it's kind of satisfying. Good luck

>>8510172
Just do

Im going to stop the edgy and just be a good person

>>8510175
Loving yourself is harder than loving others.

Love and happyness lads

If i transitioned id be a much more loving person

>>8510184
No..Not really.
Also I didn't say love yourself. I said treat yourself well. Do stuff you enjoy doing and start treating your self as a human being. You have rights, you have feelings and you have thoughts.
It's easy to go all depressive cause it's and downwardspiral into hell.
I don't want you to start acting as something you are not. Just give yourself a chance, take a long hot bath to relax, maybe even go out and eat a piece of your favourite cake.

Take one day off a week where you just do something for yourself. Go on a long walk, feel the wind on your skin, watch how the trees move in the wind, think of yourself being there. It doesn't matter if you have nobody important in your life. Just take that first step, realize you are alive and here. Just pull yourself out of the vegetable state like living condition you are in.

Loving oneself is hard. Especially when you are not comfortable with your own body and have dysphoria and depressions..
I started with taking daily walks why I was down in the dumps. I was counting five things which I hear right now, another five things I feel, another five things which I see. I started thinking about my present self without looking too much in the future.
Let all your problems be gone just for an hour, just for as long as you take that walk. Just try to enjoy everything around you and yourself.

>inb4 blab la so much work hur hurt

Just do it. Talk after you did it like a ritual for a month. My life didn't change after I started doing that, but my perspective on life changed. I won't say it's the remedy to every disease..people have to find their outlet and find things which make them realize they are alive en for themselves..

I used to think that I didn't really experience bodily dysphoria, facial hair aside, but that I just really wanted to have a woman's body and didn't care about this one. Sometimes when I walk down the street I feel like I'm just pretending to be human. Like I'm an awkward thing wearing a skin suit, trying to make the right motions, all of my muscles clenched uncomfortably. Is that it? How do I know if I actually do experience dysphoria? I've intensely wanted to be a woman for a very long time and often get depressed that I'm not one but I don't hate touching my dick or whatever.

I've Had a headache for 3 days lads

Got out of bed this morning, stretched and had the blood rush from my head and had a syncope and spasmed on the ground and nearly hit my head on the wall as I fell over

>>8510335
Brain tumour. God has granted you salvation from he torture we call life

>>8510335
Fuck. Go see a doctor Anon.

>>8510335
Result of hormones and dangerous cancer medicine

>>8510335
Blood clot? Cancer?

>>8510344
>mfw repression causes physical medical problems

I don't know. I feel fine now. It was like a more extreme version of the lightheadedness you get when you stand up too quick

All I remember is getting up, feeling dizzy, clutching my head and trying desperately to stay balanced as I fell under, then I totally lost all cognitive thought and forget where I was and slammed onto my back and then came too spasming with my head hurting from lack of blood

>>8510358
Im a repressor tho cureanon

>>8510362
Please, I exercise when m sad

>>8510362
You really really should go see a doctor, just to get checked. Maybe it's something else. Maybe it's psychosomatic.

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Anybody else here likes to pretend the pills you take(aspirins, etc) are hormones instead?

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>>8510751
Not gonna lie but that's just sad.
>this is coming form someone who exclusively drinks tap water ever since she learned that it contains female hormones

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>>8510751
Just order your estrogen woman

>>8510751
No, I believe in good health without drugs

>>8510760
I always drank tap water because bottled is expensive
>This actually explains my manboobs, sorta

>>8510784
N-no, I can't. I've tried. I've discussed with friends and family. I've thought about it logically. Hell, I found nothing but support and encouragement. And yet, transitioning would not be OK for me...


>>8510895
Come on, anon...are you an anti vaxxer too?

>>8510904
same

I don't wanna be a freak no matter how hard people hugbox me

>>8510911
Iktf. I just want to be a cis girl, not a tranny. Sorry, it just doesn't makes the deal for me. I don't want just hormones, boobs and something resembling a vagina.

I want a real femenine body, bone structure, a functioning uterus, etc. The whole package...

I guess boy-armor will have to do until I die and am reborn as a girl...

>>8509902
I don't have the money and given the choice ffs is a priority besides ill more than likely be dead in two years I hope to get ffs this year could change that but it probably won't I thought hormones were supposed to help depression I wonder if it the Cypro cause I feel like a worthless piece of shit.

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Anyone feel bad because they will never be a normal male or normal female?

>mfw

>>8510974
I think that's everyone here haha.
I'd do anything for the chance to just be normal, whether it's as a guy or preferably as a girl.
Taking mones isn't gonna make me normal, so what's the point.

>>8509579
Good luck anon I hope you end up happy.

>>8509647
9 hours too late to accept this offer fucking kill me

Just passing by to remind you all drugs won't help with repression

Im seroous, please stop while you can, a life of sadness and diseases awaits, far worse than dealing with repression, im not looking for pity just lookin to save someone while i can, i nixed lots of alcohol with some meds and now im fucking dyin, i feel so fucking cold and weakb im going to try to sleep and hope i wake up

stop while you can please go get a hoby t repress or fkint ransition if you cant deal with this but dont fucking do drugs

>>8511024
I know you're trolling, but in case you're not: call fucking 911. It's not too late anon :( you'll nevee be a girl if you anhero.

>>8511024
Please call for help!

>>8511024
If this is true I hope you get help. Let us know if you're OK.

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I just want to join a guild or group of friends with other /repgen/ girls so we can be ourselves online while playing games and voice chatting, not being anxious about our deep manly voices, because we know we are all just girls deep down and won't judge each other...

>>8511130
>girls
>deep manly voices
not how things work

either pass or be a hon
or just be a guy and live easy cis life

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>>8511180
Probably won't pass, and I refuse to be a hon. That's why I stay away from HRT.

Deciding not to transition doesn't makes me any less of a girl desu, mentally at least.

>>8511180
Good voice changers are near we just need to wait

Walking around life with a spirituals hole or empty soul isn't so bad

I've learned that now.

>>8511322
It's pretty bad, I'd rather just not have to walk around life at all.
Hopefully I don't break in another 20 years when I'm almost 40, I'll just end it before that happens.

>>8511413

>>8511413

>>8511413

>>8508751
>tfw this is me except I'm 20
>knew about trans stuff at 15/16 but didn't think it was a big deal
>knew at 18 I was prob trans but figured I could ignore it
>can't ignore it anymore and know I wouldn't pass
>grades are getting worse and i haven't even signed up for college again and it's past deadline
>parents will be super angry, planning on just kill myself before that
>hate everything about myself so suicide is a good solution