[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / biz / c / cgl / ck / cm / co / d / diy / e / fa / fit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mu / n / news / o / out / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vip /vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y ] [Search | Home]
4Archive logo
Went to a recruiter today and i'm going...
If images are not shown try to refresh the page. If you like this website, please disable any AdBlock software!

You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons

Thread replies: 205
Thread images: 30
File: IMG_6114.jpg (82 KB, 480x640) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
IMG_6114.jpg
82 KB, 480x640
Went to a recruiter today and i'm going to MEPS next thursday. Will the doc believe i got these from inthewoods bullshittery.

inb4 pussy faggot
>>
>>28626641
>Will the doc believe i got these from inthewoods bullshittery.
No.
>>
Sure, I had a couple scars I didn't even remember getting and when he asked about them I just said it was from a cat and that was that.
>>
File: 20160120_223046.jpg (3 MB, 5312x2988) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
20160120_223046.jpg
3 MB, 5312x2988
Soft af senpai
>>
File: k fag1.jpg (136 KB, 525x700) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
k fag1.jpg
136 KB, 525x700
>>28626641
Go ahead and kill yourself now, faggot.

Just a little deeper.
>>
File: 1409479934999.gif (2 MB, 366x281) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1409479934999.gif
2 MB, 366x281
Just tell them you fought a bobcat.

Or a house cat.
>>
>>28626641
You can say you were beaten as a child and those are from switches.

Switches might be a southern thing i dont know what else to call them. When you missbehave and your parents/grandparents make you pull a small branch/twig off a tree to get swatted with. Thats what a switch is.
>>
>>28626641
I had cat scratches on my arms too when I went to meps and had zero problems. Mine aren't as obvious though. Just don't act shady or spill your spaghetti trying to explain you did it in the woods if you get asked.
>>
Say its road rash from falling off a bike.
>>
>>28626753
nigga that looks nothing like road rash
>>
>>28626702

Go pick a switch, boy
>>
>>28626767
crashed into a pile of emotional despair
>>
>>28626641
OP here. I haven't seen to many scars on other people is mine even that bad? will that over look it?
>>
>>28626774
>crashed into a pile of emotional despair
FIFTY FIVE KEKS
>>
>>28626779
check
>>28626683
>>
>>28626772
Fuck you that still makes me nervous.

>my cousins and i collectively killed one of my grandmothers saplings one summer
>>
Scars from self harm are incredibly obvious in most cases.

You're fucked, you little faggot.
>>
>>28626683
Little to the right and you would have been golden.
>>
File: 1419794613013.jpg (60 KB, 722x349) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1419794613013.jpg
60 KB, 722x349
>>28626843
...what could have been
>>
>>28626641
The real question is, why should we let someone who has a hard time not hurting themselves defend our country? If they don't accept you, consider yourself lucky, because you apparently can't handle when shit gets tough.
>>
>>28627042
>why should we let someone who has a hard time not hurting themselves defend our country?
You pretty much have to be a masochist to be in the military.
>>
>>28626641
Yeah pretty much, make up some bullshit excuse for it but nobody should ask too many questions if you can do the physical okay

I have a giant scar around my left eye from when a brick was thrown at me as a kid and I told my recruiter it was a birthmark. By the grace of babby Jesus I still have 20/15 vision so the docs at meps didn't even ask me about it
>>
>>28626641
Just say that you fell off your four wheeler onto a barb wire fence

Nigga you good
>>
>>28626641
Just tell them they're from a cat.
>>
>>28626702
>>28626682
>>28626719

Medical professional here. We can tell self harm marks.

>>28626801
>>28626673

These guys have it.

That said, if you are bound and fucking determined.. surface abrasions and bruising will make it hard to tell. Take a fall off a bike onto that shoulder.
>>
>>28627384
This tbqh familia. We're busy downsizing and getting exceedingly PC anyways, go get a real job.
>>
>>28626797
>destroyed every mimosa tree within half of a miles of my house
>mom looked for 20 minutes before telling me to sit in corner
childhood victories
>>
>>28626641
No, they're too evenly spaced. He's going to know you're an emo faggot.
>>
>>28627384
>Medical professional here. We can tell self harm marks.
Like I said mate, nobody ever said a word to me about mine and I had no problems. A lot less obvious than the OPs though.
>>
>>28626641
>>28626683

Borderline personality disorder confirmed.

You BPD fags are the worst.
>>
>>28626684
God Flandre is sexy even when he's trolling
>>
>>28626641
Just get a huge tattoo to cover it up. The same one were going to get as soon as you got to your first duty station.
>>
>>28627447
When were you in? Because these days every fucking doc in the fleet has read a ton of literature on how to spot a cutter and what excuses they use, and that it's a giant fucking red flag.

Five years ago a lot of them thought cutting was something only little girls did, if they knew it was a thing at all.
>>
>>28627501
Pretty funny m8
>>
>>28627501
He should get this on his arm.
>>
>>28627496
He looks like he spends most of his day begging for money on the street. You're a legit faggot.
>>
>>28627547
I have some stretch marks on my knees that look somewhat like ops scars. Sometimes I wonder if anyone who saw them would think I was some faggot cutter.
>>
>>28627586
stretch marks scar inwards, real scars are a bit convex. They'll know the difference
>>
>>28626641
When I went through (mid-2000s), they'd have just looked the other way. If they'd've asked, they'd've believed you. But we were in the middle of two wars back then so they didn't care.
>>
>>28627547
08-12
>>
>>28626683
>cuttiing below the elbow

It's like you never wanted to wear a short sleeve ever.
>>
>>28627547
what if you're from some wierd ass culture, i mean ops white as fuck so he's fucked.

but dont the blacks and abos do ritualized scaring as initiation into manhood or something?
>>
>>28627700
Shit senpai, they're turning people away just for having tattoos now, I don't think they'll put much tolerance into the ancient Formosan art of ritual scarring
>>
>>28627042
The real question is, why should we let some little bitch in boys clothing make me sit through another fucking round of suicide prevention training after he gets drunk and offs himself upon realizing how pathetic he is?
>>
>>28626673
>>28626801
>>28627384
>>28627547
See
>>28627410

For fucks sake I got in with astigmatism. Took a waiver but I scored pretty good on the ASVAB so they let me have it. This was in 2010 when we were still going to Iraq and Afghanistan. Three months after I went to boot camp I got on Recruiters Assistance and one of the dudes I talked to also had astigmatism. Scored only a bit below me on the ASVAB but he couldn't get a waiver for his astigmatism. The military is downsizing. Now is a bad time to join unless you are really desperate to say "oh, I'm in the military". Especially since the camaraderie I enjoyed will dissolve because everyone is pushing to rank up so they don't get kicked out. Wait for another war. I'll see you there.

However, if you are that desperate, this anon has decent advice. >>28627501

You do have to make sure it is in regulation though so the tattoo can't go down too far. The last three or four cuts (that I can see in your picture) will still be visible.
>>
>>28626641
>Not cutting on your hip
Jesus, it's like you want people to find out.
>>
>>28627766
>tfw guy I used to work with in my shop had legit aspergers
>he just didn't tell anyone
>ended up a basic training honor graduate
God he was an obnoxious dick, but we all loved him.

The point is OP, you can get in with practically anything. You just need to know how to play the system.

On second thought, don't. You'll probably fuck up and get caught like a dumbass
>>
>>28627586
>stretch marks on my knees
H-How?....
>>
>>28627800
Thats usually why attention whores do it, yes.
>>
>>28626641
Wtf is this gay shit? Self harm? Holy crap what the fuck, whats all this pussy shit on my /k/
>>
>>28627804
Some shit you can lie about. For example, in addition to astigmatism, I have flat feet (sucks for boot since you can't buy insoles, doesn't matter when you're in the fleet because you can buy insoles). Not too bad, I was able to fake it for MEPS. However I can't fake the fact I have something like 300/20 vision. I need glasses.
>>
File: image.jpg (571 KB, 3264x2448) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
image.jpg
571 KB, 3264x2448
>>28626641
I'll give you a real answer but you better be doing Infantry or a combat arms mos.

They won't believe you but if you hold to your story and no matter what keep to your story your good.

They will grill you at Meps and say they will find out if your lying and you will get charged with a crime/fine but it's all bullshit anon. They act like they're CSI Miami and have these crazy resources to figure out your entire life but in reality they don't have shit. Just don't buy into the bullshit and stick to your story NO MATTER WHAT.

Also better story would be you had a kinky girlfriend.

Pic Not related, mein Doggo
>>
those 'cuts' if you can even call them that, will let your recruiter know you have terminal autism and you will be barred from joining.

Enjoy.
>>
File: hotshotknees.jpg (89 KB, 612x456) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
hotshotknees.jpg
89 KB, 612x456
>>28627823
Sitting like this for about 10 years.
>>
>>28627863
This. The only real way you can get fucked up is if you get a security clearance and something gets revealed to the investigator. That happened to a guy in my tech school, he lied about asthma, but his mom accidentally revealed it while talking to OSI. He ended up losing his job and I wanna say brought up on a court martial.

I don't even know how the hell he made through basic if he was as symptomatic as they said he was...
>>
File: 1452274566733.gif (3 MB, 658x800) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1452274566733.gif
3 MB, 658x800
unrelated question

i had testicular cancer, which means i have a half sack. does this disqualify me from ever serving? am i never gonna even get drafted either?
>>
>>28628060
Will probably need a waiver. So you most likely won't get in. Waivers will be hard to come by unless you score really high on the ASVAB or we get into another war.
>>
>>28628060
See this>>28627863

If it honestly doesn't affect you now don't say a god damn word about it and stick to your story. They will never find out no matter what they say. They try to scare you at Meps but it's all a show to get people to come forward and it works for them occasionally.
>>
>>28627568
Would you suck his dick to shoot his SVD?
>>
Just throwing this out there, but you're probably fucked.

I have scars from my crazy ass abusive father and they disqualified me because they didn't believe me when I told them it wasn't self harm, despite several testimonies from family members AND having scored 95 on the ASVAB.

So good fucking luck.
>>
File: 1452129711583.jpg (38 KB, 640x360) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1452129711583.jpg
38 KB, 640x360
>>28628100
i think a doc will notice one of my nuts being gone tho. plus the giant ass scar across my abdomen. definitely wouldn't be able to bullshit my way out of this.

>>28628098
so does this get me out of the selective service? like they would draft kids and women before they consider drafting me?
>>
>>28626641

Wouldn't they want something like this? It shows you are tolerant of pain and can heal up ok?
>>
>>28628060

Just tell them that it is like the undercarriage of an airplane. You can raise and lower at will. At the moment you are flying in economy mode.
>>
You can go to a plastic surgeon and have the scars removed.

That is about your only option, they are very obvious self harm. And honestly, the military might not be the right choice for you.
>>
Isn't peace time military shit though?
>>
Did you tell your recruiter? I mean it's pretty obvious OP. Might want to reconsider military anyways.
>>
File: 20160121_033545.jpg (717 KB, 3264x1836) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
20160121_033545.jpg
717 KB, 3264x1836
>>28627316
Thats what i did.

Didnt make it through basics though, tore my abdominal wall, leaked fluid into my nutsack. Shit was terrible, still a problem.
>thanks for the blog post
Just wanted to clarify it wasnt cause i bitched out.
>>
File: 1452311472978.jpg (8 KB, 189x190) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1452311472978.jpg
8 KB, 189x190
>>28628601
Lol. No.
>>
>>28628719
GO AWAY SWEDEN.
>>
>>28628199
Seriously though. They aren't gonna go through your life with a fine tooth comb, there are too many of you. Just stick to your guns.
>>
>>28628704
>tore my abdominal wall, leaked fluid into my nutsack.
How the FUCK did you manage that in basic?
>>
>>28628736
Once upon a time in south Carolina...
Drill sergeants let us eat, and eat, and eat, nobody told us to get up. I was full as a damn dog tick.
>GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY DEFAC YOU LOUSY PIECES OF FUCKING DOG SHIT WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE YOU FUCKING MORONS OUT OUT OUT MOVEIT MOVEIT MOVEIT
i started timing on my wrist watch after i felt a good amount of time had passed, we were doing 8 count pushups, v ups, mountain climbers, run to pt track, run a couple miles, repeat.

I dont know for sure, but i think thats what did it.
>>
>>28628756
Oh yeah the watch, it restarts after an hour, but it was at 27 min when i stoped it, so who knows how long. That was 4 years ago, but im pretty sure we did the whole process 3 times.
>>
I met a guy in basic who was missing a kidney and yet another guy who had a sever spinal deformity and not only did they somehow get through MEPS but reception as well. The spine guy was a little gangster though. Like super tiny and made it all the way until the end of blue phase before he could no longer conceal his problems on one of the longer ruck marches.

I don't know how the fuck those guys got in but I learned a lot about trusting the government because of it.
>>
>>28628788
>until the end of blue phase
Those bastards. He wasted 3 months of his life, plus the time the army took to file his seperation paperwork.

Unless his platoon kicked ass. Phases move with competency, you can go red phase for a couple months, the closer you get to graduation the more likely you are to be re-cycled.
>>
>>28628788
What kind of spinal deformity? Scoliosis?
I got a pretty minor curve inherited from my mother and even though it barely affects my appearance and daily life I figured it destroyed my chances completely, and they would find out if I had surgery to correct it anyways
What are my odds though?
>>
>>28628805
The odd of getting through meps? Probably fair. The odds of graduating from basics, then ait, slim.
>>
>>28628704
Ah shit, sorry to hear that brother.

I know how much it sucks to get kicked out in boot, I got a medical discharge from the Marines a few months ago.
>>
>>28628815
The freedoms nice though right? Its not all bad, some plans just fall through. Just gotta keep on keeping on.
>>
>>28628815
Damn homey, what happened? Any chance you can go back in after some time passes?
>>
>>28628826
Damn straight. Good luck with everything bro

>>28628831
The navy doc at boot fucked me over. I don't have shit wrong with me, he was just having a bad day. The Marines wont take me back, but the Army said they'll take me no problem.
>>
>>28628837
You too.
>>
I have some seriously bad stretch marks on my mid back from when I hit my growth spurt. Is the MEPS doc going to give me a hard time for that?
It legitimately looks like a bobcat took two horizontal swipes at my back
>>
>>28628805

I'm not sure to be honest. All I know is that that is started becoming a real issue near the end of the 10 mile ruck March and DS pulled him into the truck. It's a shame because this guy had all the heart and absolutely would not quit despite being in what was obviously some serious pain.

I would caution anyone with a potentially serious medical issue about enlisting. It's not so much that you won't be able to get in but instead that you will make it into basic and either get seriously injured and or simply suffer a minor injury but get stuck in TRADOC land as a result. The physical rehabilitation and training unit suck total ass 24/7 and even after you have healed you might still be forced to sit around for months waiting for a training slot to open up. That all depends on MOS though. If you end up getting kicked out that could also take between 3 months and a year. No joke. Paperwork at TRADOC takes forever right now.
>>
>>28626641
just get a tattoo to cover it up, or say it was a form of "scarification" tatoo style, a tribal thing
>>
>>28628847
No. I talked to the doctor who got to stare at my chocolate starfish, just to make it less awkward, he studied medicine for 13 years. Im sure hes gonna know its a stretch mark.
>>
OP SAY YOU WERE IN A SECRET GOVERNMENT FOXTROT FORCE, MORE TOP TIER THAN DELTA. EACH SCAR IS A CONFIRMED KILL OF HVT, THE ONE AT THE BOTTOM WAS BIN LADEN. THIS SHOULD DO THE TRICK AND FOOL THOSE NOSY DOCTORS
>>
>>28628856
At least they still get paid.. but that paperwork time frame is completely fair.

You have nothing to do either, maybe detail work. I worked with an armory guy sorting pieces of gun i had no idea what were, high light of my day was counting to 250 for a reason.
>>
I'm at the hotel for MEPS at breakfast right now actually. Get on the bus over at 0510.

Half these asshats are gonna be DQ'd from eating so much Aunt Jemima and orange juice. Wish me luc/k/ /k/omrades.
>>
>>28628903
Good luck brother! What branch?
>>
>fat body
>self-harm
Sounds like an estrogen overload. Eugenics could have fixed this by preventing you from being born.
>>
File: 1453349116668.png (79 KB, 326x160) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1453349116668.png
79 KB, 326x160
>>28628903
GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>
>>28628903

Just remember everything everyone has said about not telling them shit is absolutely 100% true. This is not a buddy fucking meme.
>>
>>28628913

Thank you and Air Force. Putting in a good 25 years like my dad and granddad.

>>28628925
I appreciate your enthusiasm anon. Someone give this man responsibilities!

>>28628945
I hear ya mate. As I said none of the other people in this room seem to have read their GO about not loading their asses with sugar and sodium. Wonder how many of are gonna make it.

I wore nice boxers for today. I hope senpai notices me...
>>
>>28628963
When you have your face-to-face sit down with the doctor, don't forget to mention your family's tradition of service. They eat that shit up and will give you favorable marks for that.

Also, when you ship out to basic, never pass up an opportunity to mention how your dad and granddad both retired after their long and proud service. You will automatically earn the admiration of your fellow recruits, and your MTIs will secretly respect you more after knowing this.
>>
>>28629001
Nice try.
>>
>>28628903

When the old guy grabs your junk shout "my body is a temple!" and run away.
>>
>>28626774
i was walking down stairs when i read this and almost died, faggot
>>
God damn this thread proves most of /k/ should be ineligible to own firearms.
>>
>>28629026
KEK

When I was at meps the first time we had a dude fart in his face when he was doing the butthole check.

Holy shit he was so pissed
>>
On the shuttle bus about to go over to Fort Sam Houston MEPS.

My body is ready.
>>
File: image.jpg (27 KB, 473x476) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
image.jpg
27 KB, 473x476
>>28627567
>>
>>28629062
Any grils on the bus with you? We need pics to determine who looks like they will make it and who will magically get pregnant to avoid real work.
>>
>>28629080

It's too dark on this bus to see anything my own hand but all of them look competent except this fucking annoying pseudo-midget bull dyke Mexican going Army.
>>
>>28628060
I knew someone who got in with only one nut because of testicular torsion.
>>
And now...it begins.
>>
>>28629044
Shall not be infringed.
>>
>>28626772
>triggered
>>
>>28629144
SITREPs mepsbro, we need SITREPs.
>>
This is my final transmission. About to enter metal detector. I bid you all farewell.
>>
>>28627766
New tattoo regs, as long as it isn't visible in ACU it's fine. Nothing above the neck and nothing on or below the wrist except a single ring tattoo.
>>
I have seen far worse but that was 2003-2011. I don't know how much has changed since then with the down sizing and tighter rules. They use to pretty much just ignore it though just to get people in during the prime of the wars. Plenty of my fellow soldiers had neck tattoos and hand tattoos back then. I know they changed that now so maybe it is different for stuff like what you have also. If it comes down to it just say you were young and dumb and are better now and don't have some psychotic drug history. (didn't read thread but if this was all said already, my apologies.)
>>
>>28628098
I'm getting a waiver for juvenile possession of weedlmao.
Only 66 on asvab.
>>
>>28628199
>selective service
Ignoring that a draft will probably never happen again, if it does, they won't care. If we go to war they won't care because they need the bodies. If we have a draft they really won't care because we really need the bodies.

>>28629283
Ah, USMC it can show outside of your PT clothes. If it does you have to be able to cover it with one hand. Dunno if they changed it since I got out though.

>>28629481
Weed waiver is the easiest to get. Medical waivers are a hell of a lot harder.
>>
>>28630049
Fuck. I meant
>USMC it CAN'T show....

Goddammit.
>>
File: 1441161451597.jpg (109 KB, 998x974) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1441161451597.jpg
109 KB, 998x974
>>28626772
>>
>>28628060
>i had testicular cancer, which means i have a half sack. does this disqualify me from ever serving?

Say you were born with only one nut.
>>
>>28628060
sorry, you dont have the balls to serve are country
>>
>>28626772
>pick a switch
>if you didn't pick correct switch
>grandpa picks mother of all switches
>might as well call it a log
>>
>>28630272
i tryed to pick a smooth one so when he shoved it in it didnt splinter or crack the spinkter.
>>
>>28626690
Fuckin saved
>>
>>28627751
>but das descrmanashun
>>
>>28630146
That still DQs you IIRC.
>>
File: 1452657202640.png (11 KB, 205x263) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1452657202640.png
11 KB, 205x263
>DQ'ed so hard I didn't get to the point of taking the ASVAB
Man that was disappointing
>>
>>28630460
literally how? did you wheel your hoveround into the recruitment office?
>>
>>28630804
Auto-anemic. Funny thing is that the last time I checked DoD regulations, with the condition I have I could get wavered if I had my spleen removed. So I would be okay to enlist after the major organ removal.

I wasn't really surprised it was an automatic disqualifier, but it was disappointing.

That shit would have shown on the first blood test, so no use lying about it either.
>>
File: just do it.gif (711 KB, 200x331) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
just do it.gif
711 KB, 200x331
>>28626641
>Will the doc believe i got these from inthewoods bullshittery.
Nope.

So get on a bike and fall in such a way that you get new scars that cover the old scars.
>>
Yeah, I got automatic DQ for mild scoliosis. Managed to correct it with physical therapy and exercise, but it's still on my record.
>>
Ft. Sam Houston MEPS guy here. Splashdown. I'm beautiful, I'm approved, and after shoving this ham sandwich in my face I'm goimg to job picking.

Think I might try for Aerospace Physiology or aerial gunner, with plans to crosstrain to OSI.
>>
>>28627941
I know that feel...
>>
>>28627677
>they'd've

kek

though you don't need the extra "'ve"; i know youre trying to say "they would have", but "they had" has the same meaning in this context.
>>
>>28631025
at least you're smart, I aced the ASVAB and my recruiter convinced me to go Open Mechanical because I wanted to ship quick. Don't sign a fucking open contract.
>>
>giving advice to self harming fags on how to get into the military
you're all terrible people


also, remember, it's down the street, not across the road.
>>
>>28626641
>>>/b/
>>>/adv/
>>>/r9k/
>>>/r/autism/
>>
op here, really thought this woulda 404 like 7 hours ago. I'm just gonna go in and say i fell off a fourwheeler when i was like 10. If it dont work then fuck i..
>>
>>28631145
>I'm just gonna go in and say i fell off a fourwheeler when i was like 10
Are you trying to get DQ'd for being an actual retard?
>>
>>28631116
The only ones who join the military are behavior cases anyways. Let's not pretend otherwise.
>>
>>28631153
then what the fuck am i suppose to say.
>>
>>28631157
The only ones who join the workforce are behavior cases anyways.

As shitty as the military may be, those benefits are GOAT for the youngins like me who have no hope in hell of paying for their education
>>
I have a cut scar that is maybe 1 inch long on my forearm, I saw th and doc & I he just asked me a bunch of questions . I said no mam to the self harm question & that was it.
>>
>>28630252
You dun goofed, you silly faggot.
>>
>>28631171
Just dont panic if they call bullshit. Stick to the story. Invent thw whole story before hand, keep it simple so you wont trip on your words.

>had a 250 when i was ten, helping my dad fix fence, got cocky and guned it, shirt caught the wire and grabbed me off the 250. Dad was pissed.
Done.
>>
>>28632702
thats actually not a bad story to say.
>>
>>28628060
Uniballer, the reason male applicants with one testicle are screened out is because you physiologically only produce half the testosterone of a regular male. This in itself is disqualifying, but collateral reasons are that it prevents discrimination or hazing from fellow recruits during basic training, which is a very formative time for a new member into the Armed Forces.

>Source: MEPs doc
>>
File: 1449690407990.jpg (34 KB, 500x375) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1449690407990.jpg
34 KB, 500x375
>>28632904
i was tested and i produce the same amount of Testosterone (don't need supplements)

besides this is my under standing >(Testosterone is produced by Leydig cells in your testicles. These cells produce testosterone in response to a hormone called luteinising hormone (LH). Testosterone inhibits the release of LH by the pituitary gland. Hence, when testosterone levels drop (e.g. when you lose a testicle), more LH is released by the pituitary gland, because there's less inhibition of LH release by testosterone. This means that when testosterone levels drop, LH levels rise. LH then causes the Leydig cells to produce more testosterone, so testosterone levels rise. As testosterone levels rise, they will start to inhibit LH release again. Testosterone levels will continue to rise until they reach a healthy level. They don't increase beyond this healthy level, because at this level, they suppress LH release quite significantly.) could be wrong tho

im not worried about the amount of T, more so about arbitrary rules the military has about it.

i guess civilian life is the life for me
>>
>>28626641
you were riding a bike and scrapped against stucco wall
>>
File: DSC02867.png (2 MB, 1274x750) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
DSC02867.png
2 MB, 1274x750
>>28628145
Not that anon but I shot his SVD. It was awesome. I can't find a pic of me holding it though. Here's another guy who got to shoot it after me.
>>
>>28633113
with embedded razor blades
>>
>>28626683
>>
>>28633135
some of those fuckers are fierce as fuck i would know it happened to me
>>
>step 1, get a handheld sander or belt sander. Eraser/rubber burns may also work
>step 2, apply active sander to upper arm till bloody mess is achieved
>repeat with slightly less vigor on the following body parts, on the same side as your scars.
>inside of elbow
>side of your hip
>optional:side of knee, torso/ribs
>say op, that looks like a nasty spill you took on your bike/motorcycle/skateboard

Again, you don't need to go crazy on the other parts without scars you hope to cover. Just make them look reddish. They will believe your story. Hide those scars, and it shouldn't be an issue.

I've never self harmed, though. You probably shouldn't be joining...
>>
File: 1441421047134.jpg (116 KB, 780x472) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1441421047134.jpg
116 KB, 780x472
>>
>>28632904
Also, because military work has risks of testicular injury. If you have 2 balls going into the military and lose one, you can still have kids. Have one and its gone, well call you Caitlyn...
>>
Im heading to MEPS and had ADD meds post 14 yrs old but told them it didnt do anything to me

What do?

>Grandfather says lie like a blue gum nigger
>Dad says get medical waiver and dont risk felonious charges and ruin my life

I just finished my nasis background check and im gonna schedule for the adsvab soon
>>
I bet with a buddy and half a fifth of some good hooch you could get that off with an belt sander and tell the docs you fell off a bike
>>
>>28627494
People with BPD don't normally cut themselves, at least in my experience with them.
>>
File: MammothGann731.jpg (14 KB, 320x240) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
MammothGann731.jpg
14 KB, 320x240
>>28626641
Tell him you got them wrestling a no-ropes barbed wire death match.
>>
>>28634164
Do you still take them daily?
No? Keep your fucking mouth shut.
Yes? You might want to reconsider if it poses a problem.
>>
>>28634305
I dont take it anymore but i already told my recruiter that i had one perscription filled and i pnly took like 2 pills and stopped bc they were useless and he hasnt brought it up since? I get dont ask dont tell but what if theu ask me about it at my meps?
>>
>>28626641
i could see maybe an accident involving some barbed wire
>>
>>28626772
>[CONCERN INTENSIFIES]

As my ma got fatter and lazier she just started chucking shoes at me from her chair.
>>
>>28634464
OP here. If they ask ima just say road a 250 quad into some wire when i was like 10 and not spill my scetti everywhere
>>
>>28634464
^This might work
I actually have scars that look like self-harm scars on my forearms from having to string c-wire on a field ex.
>>
>>28630962
>college athlete with 3.8 GPA
>marine recruiter falling over himself
>burn him on runs over the summer
>doing some paper work
>medical conditions
>asthma when I was 8
>watch as his eyes widen in horror
>git out

Can't even get called back from fucking national guard recruiters.
>>
>>28626641
Well at least it's in a decent spot to cover up with an injury.

Just run your shoulder into a wall a few times and get it all nice and bruised up, say you fell and broke your fall with your shoulder if they ask.
>>
>>28626641
>wears hollister
>cuts himself
>expects to be taken seriously by anyone ever

wow you literally ARE a faggot
>>
>>28633069
That's pretty neat. So is your one testicle double the size of a regular one? If so, how do the ladies like it?
>>
>>28634445
>I get dont ask dont tell but what if they ask me about it at my meps?
>I get dont ask dont tell
>dont tell
You answered your own question.
>>
>>28634977
Are the days of recruiters hooking people up over, anons?
>>
>>28626683
Josh?

If not I went to high school with a fucker who got his arm ran over with an ice skate and he has a similar scar
>>
>>28636373
Mine got me out of legal shit.
I think that counts as a hook up.
>>
>>28634943
Say uncle, not dad. Then you'll have an excuse for not having any good knowledge about quads or fences
>>
File: caesar.jpg (103 KB, 576x727) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
caesar.jpg
103 KB, 576x727
>>28626683
>not using adblock
>>
>>28637096
>not turning off ad block on 4chan
Where are we gonna go when it shuts down?
>>
>>28628098
>Waivers will be hard to come by unless you score really high on the ASVAB
I think you mean unless your family is well connected
>>
>>28628677
only if you join the army or marines, and even then its only really bad in combat arms
>>
>>28637125
then we'll finally be free
>>
>>28628858
>>28626641
This. Tell them that you were doing tribal scarification because you thought it was cooler than a tattoo. It sounds hipstery and dumb as fuck, and they will ride your ass asking you if it was sadness or self mutilation, and you keep on that bullshit train, and you look them in the eye like they are a fucking retard. "Bro, sorry i mean Sir, Its scarification. To me it was basically a tattoo, I thought it was going to look cool but it doesn't."

TL/DR: lie your ass off. dont stop the lie until you come out the other side, and then never stop. People see that shit in the shower at basic? Guess what? Keep it up. Getting ready to retire at your 20? STILL KEEP IT UP. hopefully by then you have that shit covered.

wait...

You made a best friend, or any friend in a dark moment in your career and you want to share this secret while you both bang each other's wives? ITS SCARIFICATION BRO!
>>
>>28636290
yea. since its neighbor left, it has the whole sac to itself. its like 1.5 of a nut

in fact now that i think about it i was fucking my gf for a year before she asked me about it.

does the military care about HIPA?
>>
File: IMG_1978.jpg (80 KB, 625x614) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
IMG_1978.jpg
80 KB, 625x614
>>28626641
>senpai
>>28626683
>>28628704
>>28633069

>>>/r9k/

who let you mentally ill faggots have guns? fuck the liberals were right
>>
>>28637184
>while you both bang each other's wives
>marrying whores
>2016
>>
>>28639150
To be fair /k/ auto filters t b h to the word senpai
>>
File: image.jpg (72 KB, 640x800) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
image.jpg
72 KB, 640x800
>>28627759
Jesus this. There's no place for kids who are going to most likely be at risk for harming themselves in the Marines (or what ever branch you're looking at) I swear if I have to go looking for some dumb kid who chased a bottle of sleeping pills with a few shots because gunny made him police call the smoke pit. Ugh.
>>
File: IMG_1095.jpg (2 MB, 2592x1936) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
IMG_1095.jpg
2 MB, 2592x1936
>>28626683
>>28626641
pussies

go big or fuck off
>>
>>28628719
Watching MRP march to the chow hall was the most depressing thing I've ever seen in my life. I saw our old guide who got dropped for breaking his hip crutching along when we got back to MCRD from the crucible. We dropped him like 2 days before we left, he looked absolutely devastated. Ending up in MRP was my biggest fear all through boot camp.
>>
>>28639373
Waiting for someone to post the gif of that tumblr whale from the "raid" on us that was playing with her tendon.
>>
File: IMG_1148.jpg (2 MB, 2592x1936) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
IMG_1148.jpg
2 MB, 2592x1936
>>28639458
That's just my hand anon
>>
>>28628145
I shot his SVD and didnt even need to suck his dick.
>>
>>28628145
Shot his SVD and FAL after I let him shoot my PS90 and FiveseveN.
>>
>>28639169
>2016
>not enjoying a relationship without trust issues, selfishness, or misery. Still thinking conventional relationships are the only ones that make sense or deserve to exist.
>>
>all these mentally ill faggots with guns

Great, now they're just gonna add to the statistic. Feinstein will win because of you pussies.
>>
File: IMG_1844.jpg (260 KB, 1024x1024) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
IMG_1844.jpg
260 KB, 1024x1024
>>28626772
>switched

"yes, sir."

>flashbacks worsen
>>
>>28642806
Mentally ill people commit crimes at a rate equal to the general population, but are victimized 40x as often

Don't be a dick
>>
>>28626683
Close, but no cigar.
>>
File: 1453141322052.jpg (49 KB, 662x625) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1453141322052.jpg
49 KB, 662x625
honestly just say you were abused when you were younger by a classmate. being dead serious he wont question it and you will get your opportunity to clean bathrooms for 4 years while wondering where you went so wrong in life.
>>
>>28626641
Eczema would be a more believable story. My skin looked a lot worse than that when I was younger.
>>
>>28644746
These are definitely self-inflicted cuts.
>>
>>28626641
Kill yourself faggot
>>
>>28643089
Plus, shall not be infringed.
>>
>>28626641
ATV accident
>>
>>28627863
>Also better story would be you had a kinky girlfriend.
>tfw no gf to cut my arms
>>
>>28626641
>guy starting off with mental problems wants to join up
>>
>>28626683
I know that scar from somewhere. What state do you live in ?
>>
>>28637125
They don't get revenue for ad views and I sure as hell wouldn't click them on purpose.
>>
Faggot Pussy
Thread replies: 205
Thread images: 30
Thread DB ID: 458304



[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / biz / c / cgl / ck / cm / co / d / diy / e / fa / fit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mu / n / news / o / out / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vip /vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y] [Search | Home]

[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / biz / c / cgl / ck / cm / co / d / diy / e / fa / fit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mu / n / news / o / out / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vip /vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y] [Search | Home]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the shown content originated from that site. This means that 4Archive shows their content, archived. If you need information for a Poster - contact them.
If a post contains personal/copyrighted/illegal content, then use the post's [Report] link! If a post is not removed within 24h contact me at [email protected] with the post's information.