/brit/

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>>76848677

>>76848654
I get ASMR irl from my gf

Is this the real thread?

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>>76848742
Yes. Post Memri.

http://www.strawpoll.me/13363985
http://www.strawpoll.me/13363985
http://www.strawpoll.me/13363985

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>>76848759

Nothing better than going to asmr channels and commenting that they need to speak up a bit.

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>>76848777

my jaw looks very nice dead on
but it looks like crap from the side

hmm

>>76848768
Extremely bad poll

Shant waste anymore clicks

>>76848793
Are these fucking real?

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getting the /daily dose/

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>>76848858
At least according to /mena/ the translations are usually correct

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>>76848869
Good idea desu

bum hair is growing out of control lads

someone post the video where someone writes in to ask if gay sex is ok if its for jihad purposes (stretching the butt to fit bombs inside) and the guy says yes

e pluribus unum
diversity is our strength :)

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>>76848879
GaySMR is the next big thing

>>76848879
you gay?

How do i get a scar like tony montana i want to look more gangster

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>>76848909
Why haven't you moved here Austriam8, you're a massive Britboo.

Bought some designer underwear recently
£25 for one pair, literally 50 times more expensive than my usual M&S fare

call me a high roller cause im living the cream

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>Thanks for taking me out for dinner, Anon
>You must be starving after working out at the gym all day!

enjoying memri posting

Job interview tomorrow, can't be arsed, doubt I'll get it

Ffs

>eat cakes every day
>don't do exercise
>peeing more often
>tiring easily

reckon ive got the diabetes lads

>>76848996
whats the job?

>>76849025
gimmick quality assurance

>>76848996
not with that attitude

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going to an alternative heavy metal concert

have never listened to metal and much prefer smooth jazz

what should i do to prepare

pic is a man btw

Considering trying to move to Bristol, think it is one of the less ruined cities in the UK

>>76849025
Consultancy role at a lobbying firm

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>>76848984

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sue

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>>76848949
Would love to actually, but I've studied law so my education would be entirely worthless in the UK and I'd end up working in a call center and off myself after a year. So I can only stare from afar and wonder what it would be like,

>>76849052
i live in bristol

Going to the chapel and we're gonna to get married.

>>76849009
reckon you're a fat cunt

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new harry potter film is looking good lads

>>76849083
>So I can only stare from afar and wonder what it would be like,
probs for the best lad

>>76849083
>center

Fuck off yank

don't think i will ever know if these memri pics are actual translations and i am ok with that.

not like they're any more ridiculous than fox news/cnn and such

why does everyone here work in consultancy

must be some kind of gimmick

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me on the right

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>>76849083
screeching at this one

>>76849083
law degree can set you up well for a civil service job according to my dad who i just asked

>The report showed that, in Scotland, 18-year-olds from the most well-off areas of the country are four times more likely to go to university than those from the least advantaged areas, despite the lack of university fees.

>In England, which does have a fees policy, students from the most advantaged areas are just over twice as likely to go to university as those from the least well-off areas, and three times as likely if they're from Northern Ireland or Wales.

hm odd

>>76849091
Not considering moving there anymore

>>76849105
not fat

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>>76849147
howling

>>76849127
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57NHLVcsy-Y

here's one they fight with shoes

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fjb2kGRWYpg

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>>76849127
https://youtu.be/gCvMMSTOl4Q

If you want some live action memri roleplay for /brit/ giggles

>>76849219
well that escalated quickly

>>76849173
BMI?

>>76849160
don't know about scotland but england has policies that privilege students from comprehensives

might wank the ol' willy

>>76849083
>center
Not welcome here pal.

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JADZIA DAX GETS BLACKED

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>>76849186

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>>76849194

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>>76849157
Really? I know it's relatively easy to switch between different jurisdictions in mainland Europe because our codified laws are based on the same principles and relatively similar. Everything is either influenced by German BGB oder French CC. Your case law system however is drastically different.

Still, I think I'll call the British embassy to inquire about that.

>>76849267
WORFED

i could never imagine someone taking off his shoe

>>76849157
your dad's a nonce

>>76849239
23.0

0.10 willy:height ratio

>>76849136
Pretty sure it's just me and one other lad, I'm unfortunately just here a lot

>>76849219
It's like Muslim Jerry Springer

Dont get the point of pinterest

Sometimes your brain tells you , it is time to listen to some Pink Floyd , Do you understand ?

>>76849239
26

>>76849316
Do you have separate barrister/solicitor jos, ora combined lawyer job?

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>>76849267
What did he mean by this?

>>76849316
Dying. Hadn't seen the last two slides of this before

>>76849321
really? you can never conceive of something as outrageous as a man removing a shoe from his foot?!

>>76849358
>click on image on google images
>its from pintrest and you're not allowed to open it without logging in
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

why are muslims obsessed with fighting with their shoes?

>>76849327
>>76849392
fat cunts

you now remember when george bush dodged that show that was thrown at him

>>76849186
what's wrong with the presenter's face? he's like a black bloke painted white

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>>76849239
Fucking hell lads just checked on the NHS website. I'm on the edge here.

>>76849456
it's not all in one place

im built like a brick shit house

Level of tv bants this high should not be possible

just learned that a scot invented the TV

how come everyone knows who invented the telephone and the radio but noone's ever heard of John Logie Baird?

>>76849472
why are you talking about shoes you weirdo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wy_1OquIrdQ

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Post your favourite asmr/gf simulators lads

>>76849480
almost passed the green card minimum requirements

>>76849499
everyone's heard of him you dim wit

who the fuck invented the radio

>>76849531
literal vampire

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sometimes take the memri pics and change the translations then post them

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>>76849420
It's combined here. Once you've got your license you can represent people in all courts.
Honestly that dinstinction you guys have seems a bit weird to me.
>>76849424
Have some more la

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>>76849480
>been BMI 18-19 for my entire childhood
>checked about a year ago, gone up to 21, that's fine
>checked a few weeks ago
>24

https://youtu.be/RYTTN8HeXdI

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>>76849536

>>76849546
scot detected

>who the fuck invented the radio

marconi obviously

bit taken aback by that BMI news. going to star running and starving myself

>>76849531
moonglove is best ASMRfu and sadfu

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Qwrj6qr_ao

>ywn EVER see a new moonglove video in this lifetime

>mum away with work for a week
>enjoying some peace and quiet
>she rings every fucking hour to talk about some inane shit or nag me about watering the garden, checking the post or taking the bin out
>tell her to stop ringing because it's annoying
>she gets upset

For fucks sake I want to move out but I can't afford to.

>>76849562
What will future generations think of this?

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hungry

all there is to eat is a shitty roast beef sandwich

going to have microwave sosage and mashed potetoes for diner

>>76849585
never heard of him. had to google it. tv killed the radio so i'm willing to bet more people know of logie baird

people are always going on about scots inventors . no one gives a shit about italian inventors

>>76849601
order a takeaway

>>76849600
>Why is that person so light skinned?

watched twilight 1 last weekend shall be watching new moon this weekend

>>76849604
it's 10 pm you fat fuck

ah yes a posh twat who's taken 4 years off work without any apparent money worries even though he has no income building a house 50 times the size of anything i'll ever live in on grand designs. excellent.

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>>76849531

i personally did not know who invented the telephone or the radio

>>76849676
where is my flag gone

>>76849680
dont care

>>76849701
>nose

oy

>>76849640
we already spend like $20 a day on food
trying to save money

>>76849695
I dont get angry at that, i get angry at the middle aged boomers who "just want a change of scenery" when what they really mean is that there is an african tribe occupying their road.

>>76849557
It is weird desu. It's possible to get legal authorisation to do both (solicitor advocates can go to higher courts, direct access barristers can do litigation), but it's rare and they both get looked down on.

>>76849695
The people on Grand Designs are fucking idiots who go into a huge amount of debt to build their hideous house

>>76849695
>Work so hard you can afford to take 4 years off work in your older age
>get demonised by lazy NEETs out of jealousy (under the guise of fairness)

>>76849480
W:h ratio?

>>76849711
it changes depending on which fake news you prefer to read

>>76849711
The verb for making a call in Dutch is literally "Bellen"

>>76849701
went on a tinder date with a bird who looked like a chunky version of her. she opened her mouth and had little peg teeth with gaps you could fit your thumb in. awful breath.

>>76849756
>these men are considered scholars

howling

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i wonder if netherlad knows about a "dutch oven"

>>76849711
telephone - alexander graham bell
radio - no idea

>>76849791
FUCK i meant to say television not telephone

everyone knows alexander graham bellend

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>>76849791
>Bellend

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https://www.fb.com/bbcthree/videos/10154558100446479/

Ah yes, the BBC

scot invents the tv then throws a sulk because there's fuck all on

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>>76849791
>Bellend

>>76849860

oh my

>>76849562
hate having to talk to the hairdresser

>>76849711
'The radio' is too complicated and varied for a single person to take the credit.

Marconi did the first trans atlantic radio transmission though and is seen as being very important in radio.

just had a dream that /int/ got selectable flags

>>76849857
i'll answer that question Hiba: probably not, you know

>>76849813
I do, but it's called "making an anne frank" over here

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>>76849757
Just...why?
You don't do anything drastically different in front of higher courts. In plenty of cases both sides just go through the same arguments again and additionally insist that the other party is a bint.

>>76849831
>>76849878
alri craig

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LOL

>>76849917
it does its called redditflags, but its only for the intelligentsia of /brit/

>>76849917
grim

>>76849917
>he's so addicted he dreams about 4chins
Sad!

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why are lefties so flabby and disgusting

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>>76849954
It's the sidebar articles that get me everytime I see this

>>76849929
Snobbishness mostly. Barristers like being the elite few and don't want smelly peasant litigators invading their patch.

Since most senior judges used to be barristers, there's no driving force for change.

*rewinds to before gamergate*
*prevents it from happening*
*fast forwards back to today*

lefty here. ripped and handsome.

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>>76849791
>Bell-end

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>why are lefties so flabby and disgusting

>>76850016
"Pick up that soy can, infidel!"

>>76850018
get off the proxy alan

>>76850016
all hail president jeb!

>>76850034
Erm national SOCIALISM is a left wing ideology x

>>76849999
>nuclear annihilation is part and parcel of living in a big city
screeching

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>why are lefties so flabby and disgusting

wow president clinton is doing a really good job
glad the brexit vote failed as well

>>76850016
ah yes, I can't wait for that shrieking man ghoul "Brianna Wu" to become the next president

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screeching

https://twitter.com/britisharmy/status/881923045643796480

>>76849857
She's qt

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>>76850065

>>76850034
this is the peak of male fitness

Would probably let another straight lad bum me if he didn't make too many gay sex noises ngl

>>76850100
what a time to be alive

>>76844222
i deleted my folder a while ago sry lid

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>>76850100
>Is your job to defend this country or become the paramilitary wing of the Guardian?

HOWLING

>>76850100
Join the Army; Be the BEST.

choon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VcHJySm7ZO0

>>76850152
imposter

>>76850152
did you have a nervous breakdown or something
where did it all go wrong

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>one cloud in the ENTIRE fucking sky
>its over the Sun
for fucks sake

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>>76850006
Grim.

Being a judge sounds comfy though. Might apply for a position some day. But for now I take pleasure in suing people.

>>76850219
That's not a cloud, it's a tear in the sky itself.

>>76850063
golem get ye gone

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>>76850100

>mirco-inequalities

my dads a high court judge

>>76850215
nah got a job and live the proper runt life now and then the gf also shaved her head and it all got a little too much for me desu

>>76850239
You can be a tribunal judge on £110k after just 4 years practising as a lawyer. It's extremely comfy

>>76848654
Now I go cleanin' windows to earn an honest bob
For a nosy parker it's an interestin' job

Now it's a job that just suits me
A window cleaner you would be
If you can see what I can see
When I'm cleanin' windows

Honeymoonin' couples too
You should see them bill 'n coo
You'd be surprised at things they do
When I'm cleanin' windows

In my profession I'll work hard
But I'll never stop
I'll climb this blinkin' ladder
Till I get right to the top

The blushin' bride, she looks divine
The bridegroom he is doin' fine
I'd rather have his job than mine
When I'm cleanin' windows

The chambermaids' sweet names I call
It's a wonder I don't fall
My mind's not on my work at all
When I'm cleanin' windows

I know a fella, such a swell
He has a thirst, that's plain to tell
I've seen him drink his bath as well
When I'm cleanin' windows

Oh, in my profession I'll work hard
But I'll never stop
I'll climb this blinkin' ladder
Till I get right to the top

Pyjamas lyin' side by side
Ladies nighties I have spied
I've often seen what goes inside
When I'm cleanin' windows

Now there's a famous talkie queen
She looks a flapper on the screen
She's more like eightie than eighteen
When I'm cleanin' windows

She pulls her hair all down behind
Then pulls down her... never mind
And after that pulls down the blind
When I'm cleanin' windows

In my profession I'll work hard
But I'll never stop
I'll climb this blinkin' ladder
Till I get right to the top

An old maid walks around the floor
She's so fed up, one day I'm sure
She'll drag me in and lock the door
When I'm cleanin' windows

When I'm cleanin' windows

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3 hours of slavery to go

sex robots as a concept i find incredibly sad

>>76850100
>Lone Gurkha awarded Victoria Cross after correctly identifying all 72 genders in one go

>people outperformed by whites are inferior
>people who out perform whites are in a multiple millenium old racial cabal keeping the white man down and also inferior

Very interesting

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>>76850239
This one cannot be real

just heard a supposed """""irish""""" cyclist in the tour de france today

thought he sounded a bit english and turns out he's an english bloke, born in england with an english accent who's never lived in ireland

wtf?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dan_Martin_(cyclist)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHiiEohNEVQ

>accidently started talking to the ex when i was drunk
>now she won't leave me alone
Ahhh yes

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Playing this great freeware game/visual novel called Digital Love Story

it has the most earsplittingly loud dialtones when you connect to BBSes that really get the nostalgia juices flowing

would recommend for a comfy 1-2 hour experience tbqh

>>76850100
only way you could fix "micro-inequalities" would be abolishing ranks or letting soldiers elect their own officers

>>76850274
good night, sweet autist

>>76850287
great song

https://youtube.com/watch?v=wFn2B00Pka4

>>76850327
accidentally fuck off normie twat

>>76850311
https://twitter.com/FocusBreak/status/881943194342232064

>>76850348
>letting soldiers elect their own officers
Fucking Turians

>>76850321
>competes for the Irish team
same as football, people always refer to players by the national team they play for

>>76850321
fuck off
you took our best cricketer a few years ago

sue me 'en

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this fucking german is raiding my blood pressure

>>76850327
Ah yes, contacting an ex in the first place, great idea captain.

Are you a Southern Poof lad?

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>>76850394
>Photographer, Gamer, Supreme Overlord of Awesome.

>>76850413
no that's the burgers you big blubbery wobbly wog

lads we should all band together and make our own multimedia platform

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>>76850280
>110k for a comfy, secure government job where it's almost impossible to fire you

Not bad. Gonna call the Brit embassy tomorrow and ask what my degree is worth on the isles. Might actually hop over the channel after all if it's still useful.

>>76850319
hamas children's show

>Saraa: Nur, do you think we should go ahead and chop off Assud's hand now?
>Assud: No, no. Saraa, I'm begging you...
>Nur: Saraa, he has repented and promised never to do it again, then that's it.
>Saraa: Well, if we don't chop off his hand, maybe we should chop off his ear?
>Assud: No, please, no, I'm begging you...

>>76850453
shalln't with a Y*nk

>>76850406
sue

>>76848654
nice.
who dat?

this angers the american

>>76850401
there's no national teams in the tour de france lad and he's never competed at the olympics so it's not like he's getting an advantage for being classed as an irish rider

>>76850413
why this time? are you waiting for sex bots?

lads how come no black people anywhere on the planet were able to invent the most basic of shit until whites shows them how?

reminder that if you don't have your own pool you ARE a povvo

>>76850511
geographic isolation

>>76850287
nice.
who dat?

(origano)

>>76850511
>tries really hard not to read anything about all the ancient african civilisations

>>76850446
thats not there for dorks on 4chan to read. make fun of him all you want but when girls read that it codes as confidence in their brain. it makes their pussies sopping wet

>>76850532
don't have one because i don't need one

>>76850523
Rather arguing than rape and communism that niggers bring looking for gibs.

>>76850511
Why the fuck would you invent shit when you got a big dick? Orientals are smart for the same reason

My father, he was green and my mother, she was orange
It is the biggest mix-up that you have ever seen

>>76850536
>massive resource rich continent

>>76850547
>*tries really hard to confuse "invent stuff" with "have a civilisation"*
>*accidentally falls for the ethiopia meme instead*

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SCREAMING

>>76850523
Absolutely no one would deny that Spaniards, Slavs, Gingers and Nordics are white lad

daily reminder that Spaniards, Slavs, Gingers and Nordics aren't white

>>76850616
the worst thing the world ever did was "accept" the gays

>>76850511
combination of manorialism + harsh winters in europe (forced to adapt to them) + they didn't cull 3/4% of the population every year like europeans did

>>76850616
>LGBT Champion
>i took 6 cocks in Afghanistan mate
>i was getting blown on the side of the road, it was a hummer

thinking about hanging up the ol' cloak

my desire to raid has waned despite tomb of sargeras being an awesome raid and my class having a fun spec to play now after being a little dull this entire expansion...

i want to focus on leveling up in real life now rather than leveling up in video games...

>>76850572
>niggers bring communism
wtf i love black people now!

>>76850618
not quite sure about gingers tbf

>>76850647
printing this one out to read later lad

*laughs and slops beer all over myself*

>>76850511
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iron_metallurgy_in_Africa
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_kingdoms_in_pre-colonial_Africa

>>76850541
George Formby you uneducated frog.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sfmAeijj5cM

Pubes grow on my shaft ever since i got the snip lads, might unironically get my shaft lasered....shaving it is a chore

>>76850616
>British Army LGBT Champion

think nobody will steal his valour

>>76850668
im white ty

bored

imagine the roman army bragging about how well they treat gays haha

>>76850692
>STILL chatting about civilisations
must be a nigger to be this illiterate

>Although the origins of iron working in Africa have been the subject of scholarly interest since the 1860s, it is still not known whether this technology diffused into sub-Saharan Africa from the Mediterranean region
fucking state of ye

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>>76850509
Don't need sex bots, have VR

>>76850708
sure thing hellspawn

hey look how tolerant and accepting the army is

now i am sure we are the good guys!

>>76850647

>Asia for the asians, Africa for the africans, Europe, Australia, New Zealand, North America and parts of Southern America for the europeans

>>76850616
bet this is supported by less than 1% of army personnel and im saying that with absolute sincerity

>>76850734
this isn't the roman army though

>>76850752

Not for long.

>>76850734
>Romans
>Not the most gay civilisation in history

Mate do your research you fucking catamite.

>>76850758
your imagination is shit lol

>>76850787
That would be the Greeks

>>76850607
Most white success is due to external inventions that seeped into Europe and diseases by sheer luck that helped them clear the Americas.

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>>76849083
>tfw I studied law in a common law jurisdiction and could easily get a job in a prominent London firm if I wanted

>>76850616

the worst the world ever did was allow fags to take over the rainbow symbol

>>76850447
say that online not to my face then see what happens

>>76850777
Oh well

*rejoices audibly*

>>76850787
I know they were gay but they didn't tweet about it

>>76850801
>white people weren't successful until the 1600s
state of nigger "brains"

>>76850787
it's not gay if you're top

>>76850801
None of that was true in Ancient Greece or Rome, and all European inventions have been spread to every corner of the world yet were still the best

think the old 'pression is coming back lads

>>76850801
white success is due to liberal institutions first developed in britain

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>>76850801
don't think so sweaty

>>76850814
will never forgive them for ruining an icon of hope and wonder and joy for children and turning it into a symbol representing disease and paedophilia and evil

>>76850845
this but it was actually the conservative institutions

>>76849929
>You don't do anything drastically different in front of higher courts.

Perhaps that's true in Civil Law systems where lawyers are just glorified monkey scribes who read giant codexes and judges are picked straight out of school. Case law + precedent + stare decisis makes the life of a litigator/barrister in common law jurisdictions entirely different from, say, a transactional lawyer/solicitor.

>>76850814
suck my nob u blubbery wubbly woggly wog

>>76850828
Correct. Europe was impoverished, wartorn and irrelevant compared to the Eastern civilisations. White people didn't exist until the late 17th century in America anyway.

>>76850876
actually it was the liberal institutions like the magna carta, rule of law and free trade

>>76850810
its a lot more family friendly than the other flag they proposed - a guy sucking several dicks in the bathroom of a gay night club. it was a very elaborate flag.

>>76850887
look at the state of this nigger lads lmao

>>76850853
iceland mentioned

Thinn girls look great on your arm but honestly girls with a bit of extra flesh on them are far better in bed. So much more to grab and they're all soft and warm

>>76850881
maybe i will
what then

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Lads. Lord Denning.

Lord Alfred Denning. Lads.

>>76850853
>Egyptian civilisation started thousands of years before the common era
>arbitrarily start at 800 bc
Very interesting

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>>76850807
Would like to see you begging a disgruntled British civil servant for that work visa you desperately want

IT'D FUCKING SWEETY


NOT FUCKING SWEATY


STUPID PAKI FUCKS

>>76849083
Want to swap? You can take my job in London, and I'll live the comfy life in Tirol.

>>76850799
>catamites
>just Greeks

ahahahahahahaha alri' mate

/brit/ is strangely enough one of the most gullible places on the site, posters here dont just fall for bait they leap on it, clawing all over each other in a desperate hurry to post their outraged replies like horrible ugly little rodent vermin

>>76850835
the most important invention for european success was gunpowder, a non-european invention.

>>76850947
It's IT'S

not fucking IT'D

stupid forking rourke

@76850959
>he fell for it

>>76850982
if that's the case how come china stayed an underdeveloped shithole and europe dominated the globe?

>>76850947
umm no sweaty x

>>76851005
too addicted to opium

>>76850906
no it was conservative institutions like the divine right of kings, common law and the corn laws

do you guys ever think that historians in the future will put 4chan posts in their books? they'll look back on important 4chan posts much in the same way that we look back on the writings of people like benjamin franklin

>>76850933
they didn't invent anything besides papyrus and various shit for quarrying stone and building etc.

>>76851017
repeal of the corn laws best day of my life

Considering just going on holidays by myself now because I can't find any friends to go with. Might do a dry run in Snowdon and if that's any good, just keep going with it.

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>>76848654
choon
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLyM62EJfgw

>>76850933

Egyptians were mostly European.

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>>76851017
hello charles stuart

>>76851005
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Qing_conquest_theory

>>76850982
Romans didn't have guns

>>76851026
no. they probably will with reddit though desu

>>76851075
WE

the absolute STATE of this fucking weaboo ahaha

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Please post a new

>>76851119

HERE

>>76841959
>>76841959

>>76850947
ummmm sweaty dearset..