>Try Tinder because all the brehs are doing it
>Match with 7/10 qt
>High test, I guess
>Just got off the phone with her
>Turns out she's pretty slutty
>Or was just hella drunk
>Sent me a picture of her booty.
>No, it is not pic related
Is this it /fit? Also, general Tinder success thread.
OP here, had to get the picture on mobile.
Here's her ass, because I don't really give a shit. and I hope that
1) I don't get fucked up for this
2)She doesn't browse /fit/
She's rich, try to make her fall in love with you?
How do i know she's rich? She can talk her parents (mom mosy likely) to buy her fake tits
Oh, her tits are fake iif you couldnt clearly see that.
Im guessing beautiful goy mother, jew cuck father
She's apparently into butt stuff. I responded "I would put my thumb in it" and she just says "Hehe, go ahead anon" Which I'm fine with, but at the same time kinda thrown off about because HPV or some shit.
I cant shitpost at max speed if i read every damned green word im replying to
I use the term shitpost but actually my posts are gold usually
>mfw i maximized the image and saw her face
fuck yes nigga
the second her panties drop my face would dive right into that ass
Not really. I think she looks pretty qt. Maybe average or just below average for /fit/s standards. But im looking through "just got dumped and she has a nice ass" goggles.
when are you doing it anon?
famsterdam you better fuck this girl and let us know all about it
even better if you get more pics of her
It's okay, bro. I'm black too and this is the only white girl on this app who wasn't fat and gross. You'll make it.
There will come a day where I fuck her, take pictures of her naked body with a message saying "Sup /fit/", and make a thread on it. It could be days, weeks, or even months, but you can screencap me on that.
Also mind the warning coloration.
>doesnt matter cause LOL NOT 6'4
I dont give a shit about height in real life but on tinder it actually matters
irony is it's a fuck app, and my dick is above average. go figure.
underwhelming i kno but it was a cute girl who was ways out of my league so i wasnt going to take her seriously
Dude... lemme clue you in a bit.
My opener went something like this.
"I have some things I'd like to say... But probably shouldn't."
Match(s) said "Say what?" or "Say it anyways..." or something like that.
I would respond
"I want to explore every inch of your body with my mouth."
Next message, like it's an afterthought, right after I sent that one.
"But not the feet tho. Cuz that's just weird."
Because I'm funny and shit.
Worked like a charm. It's tinder man. Swing for the fences. Srsly.
Deleted my tindr tho. I was never the 'fling' or 'tryst' type of guy. Too shallow for me I guess, but no judgment on wanting to get your dick wet. Have fun.
Not black, but that's why I deleted mine.
I seriously found myself becoming someone I'm not to do shit I never cared about in the first place.
The chicks on there have something wrong with them. My fucked logic lead me to the conclusion that any woman who has to have an app to get fucked probably has trouble doing it in person for whatever reason (fat, mentally unstable, bitter/jaded or whatevr).
Good luck bros.
life is a series of random encounters with sluts
but I agree, it's kinda awkward since you know you are on the app just for one thing. all this conversation and common interest bullshit is just an act. noone fucking cares about you having a dog on tinder, or what you study.
What do types of pics do /fit/bros have for their profile pictures? What do you have for your bios? What are some openers you use? Do you pay for plus? I have no idea how to get gud at this, help please
TOP FUCKING KEK
To all the haters. Suck my dick
your case that you're an insecure chode who reverts to "i dont even like you anyway" and condescension when you don't get what you're looking for? this is the most faggoty, beta shit to pull. you are the ultimate fedora. this is just undignified. and your whole trouble schpiel better have been b8 because that shit is retarded.
Man what the fuck, I've used this app for 3 months, deleted it for a bit, and got it back 2 months ago and in all that time I've never had any matches. How the fuck do you do it? The only social friend I have that I can stomach to bring with me around girls isn't old enough to drink, but he's much better at it than I am so if I could bring him he'd get all the girls. So I'm pretty much alone in my endeavor. What the fuck do I do?
I was on my first tinder date yesterday. Fucking bitch used old pictures and was way fatter. I'm still pissed off I HATE fatties.
I have 5 more dates with other chicks this week. I can't handle it if more girls have used old pics + angles. What do I do?
>recently met up with some tinder bitch
>got to know her, she's actually a bretty cool person
>a week after we met, we netflixed and chilled, she turned out to be a freak in the sheets (my fetish 2bh fayum)
>a week after we fucked, we go to this food place
>she pays for the whole tab, even after I offered to help pay for it
I tried contacting her again, but she's being aloof and now is ignoring me. Oh well, at least I got free food out of this
If you type something that sounds friendly or "charming" then delete that shit and try to imagine that the girl you're talking to is 3/10 and then rewrite your message.
As a general rule, always pretend that the girl you're talking to is ugly as shit and you're doing her a favor by talking to her. No woman wants a man that's fawning over her for approval like some love-sick 15 year old girl.
Breh, I had the same thing happen.
They key is to go for coffee. NEVER go to dinner unless it's the third date.
Also, if they don't look like their pictures, and you don't find them attractive, just say so. That's what I did. If they're hot, of course don't say it. But if you're meeting up for sex, don't even consider them human. It's like meeting up with a rake to persuade it to let you use it to rake leaves. Seriously. They're fungible. Just be blunt and brutal with them, and most of the time they text you first afterwards anyway because they can't handle rejection.
And this is coming from a moderately good looking guy who had over a hundred matches in two weeks.
>mfw people interpret a "totally" as anything but sarcasm
Who are you and how can I attain such confidence
>that feel when I'm so ugly that I haven't even gotten 200 matches in 8 months
>that feel when gay guys say I'm extremely hot
>that feel when my first sexual experience was initiated by the girl and I fingerbanged her on my couch a few hours after meeting her
Am I that ugly? Am I not? /fit/ has rated me a 5-6. What the fuck is going on.
I don't get matches
Im sure she saw the disappointment in my eyes and body language. We went bowling so I just played the game and "practiced dating" cause I just got out of a 7 year relationship. In the end she tried to get close to me and I said let's just be friends and left.
oh shit u mightve found one of those insecure tall girls quick ask her does she prefer doggy or cowgirl and if she responds, u respond "ok then when would u like to meet up for a bit of coffee?"
Tinder is a simple equation. Take a picture with a dog, make it your profile picture. Include a witty one line caption. Write your interests in single words, but not too many, where you go to school, and height. Have at least 2 other pictures of the dog following the first, then pictures of yourself. Pussy will roll in. I fucked 10 girls within 6 months last year, and I only half assed it. Never thought it was possible.
You just need to stop being such a pussy. Seriously, don't be afraid of women. They're literally weaker, morally bankrupt men. Go for gold and just get used to rejection and being ballsy. If I can go from a crippling introvert to treating women like pieces of meat, so can you.
Just stop being a little bitch, and man the fuck up.
You're gonna make it, breh.
She's asleep now probably
I'm afraid to pull out the big guns, bros
>how do you do
It isn't 1920, people don't talk like this in 2016
Get a dog. Women will bitch about height, but if you have stuff, they don't care.
I'm 6'2, an asshole, a pretentious philosophy major, poor as fuck, but I have a german shepherd puppy
easiest pussy ever desu lads
Don't describe yourself as fit, just say you powerlift or something so you don't sound like a typical gym faggot. Seriously, every guy on tinder puts working out as a hobby, and 95% of the faggots aren't even 4/3/2/1. Also, say you like nature, travelling, animals,name a relatively obscure band depending on the girls you want to pull (I went more mainstream with Pearl Jam and Smashing Pumpkins for those hipster sluts), and say you like reading. Make your profile relatively diverse.
As for pictures, travel pics, and do NOT put a shirtless picture. Bitches can't handle narcissistic guys because they feel challeneged. You'll only pull greasy girls then.
Or, if you're asking me (I can't tell), no my abs aen't really visible because I've been doing Candytoes and sheiko for a few months, and yes I'm fit.
you are talking to a guy, on a fake profile while you are on a fake profile
Same guy, different girl. Masha is asleep
Fingers cross't brehs
I'm not advising him to get a dog for the sole purpose of picking up chicks, if anything owning a dog will help you realize how worthless women are once you have a dogbro that loves you unconditionally. A dog can be a useful means to picking up chicks, but the dog is an end in itself while these women are not.
As a further note, spare me your moralism, you insipid twat.
yeah, she was pretty ugly
she has actually been raped 9 months earlier and hasn't been with anyone since. we ended up fucking more after that etc etc
yeah, haven't been on /fit/ for a while. just thought I'd share a good one ;3
nah m8, we met up and I came inside her
Only invoking 9/11 can save this trainwreck.
>"This conversation has been very boring so far and I'm not 100% satisfied with the conversation that you've been providing up to this point, but I have to tell you something. When the World Trade Center came down, I saw something that no place on Earth could have handled more beautifully, more humanely than New York. You had two 110-story buildings come crashing down. I saw them come down. Thousands of people killed, and the cleanup started the next day, and it was the most horrific cleanup, probably in the history of doing this, and in construction. I was down there, and I’ve never seen anything like it. And the people in New York fought and fought and fought, and we saw more death, and even the smell of death — nobody understood it. And it was with us for months, the smell, the air. And we rebuilt downtown Manhattan, and everybody in the world watched and everybody in the world loved New York and loved New Yorkers."
What do to my profile to get me matches? Can't post pics but current stats are 6'0" 225lbs, 7/10 face (I've been told, don't know for sure, don't want my face on an Ethiopian PS Vita repair forum) but just started my cut so my body is kind of chunky but I wear a shirt in all of my pics.
Same guy again, another old Match. Leggo!
>bitches hate Trump.
You got to step up your game, bud. They love Trump, they just don't admit it to their friends because he's the ultimate bad boy.
Insulting Trump is like being the beta orbiter that takes effeminate little shots at the top alpha and then gets sent to the kuckshed.
Being a Trump supporter is a great way to get girls interested in you. You start off by making fun of their beliefs, laugh at them for supporting Bernie Sanders, and then talk about how Trump will kick his ass.
It loses it's novelty after time
I mean the girlfriend and tinder sluts
Just get a dogbro.
>Can you be the Kokopelli to my wood flute
I'm at the stage where the girlfriend wants me to commit, and I just really don't. I sometimes fantasize about being single and just fucking new bishes every month.
I don't what to do mang.
Forgot to mention, my bio says "Eat. Sleep. Lift. Repeat." if that helps. Writing it out now it sounds really robotic so idk.
Can't get a dog because of living conditions but I'm moving soon and fully intend on getting one.
Relevant to both above, how does this sound:
"Art & Gym. Come help me pick out a dog."
Buy the dog yourself.
Do not let bitches influence your choice of hound.
>fuck girl once and then never see her again cause she's "seeing someone"
>yeah right bitch
>6 months pass
>text her "You know it would be cool if you sent me some nudes"
>she replies unamused
>couple days later she sends me nudes out of the blue
>now she's coming over to fuck later this week
The hell happened?
Why aren't you getting the ladies by posting slightly modified political speeches from great politicians of the past?
>What is the most important thing to you in a relationship? You don't need to answer that because I'll tell you what it should be. The most important thing in any relationship is leadership. Not leadership by the most popular or the friendliest, but by the strongest and the best. Any group or family should be lead by the best and the strongest, otherwise it disintegrates. It needs to have group pride and loyalty. You also need to have selection in the mating process, something that we've almost lost now. It is of fundamental importance that the strongest and best of the men mate with the best type of women, who will make good mothers! And when you destroy that machinery then you get what we have now, which is chaos!
>Every National Socialist believes in idealism. Believes in something that is worth more than his own one single human life. He's willing to die for something. When you're ready to die for something, then you're alive. And until you are ready to die for something, you have no real fanaticism. You might be about to say that fanaticism is a bad thing, but did you ever stop and think about how this country got here? How all of the great inventions were created? Whatever you are doing, you should be fanatical about it. If you're going to be a doctor then you need to be a fanatical doctor, otherwise you will be nothing. You will just be an ordinary person and when you die then no one will even notice.
Women are the most fickle creatures on the planet.
I messaged a girl to go for coffee, and she replied a month later. When we met, she was being a huge bitch, so I told her she was being a huge bitch. She then freaked and we never met again.
And now she has herpes.
Life is funny.
all that starving on IF.......
just say "happy X" where X is the current day. Special points if monday or weekend-day fampai
>>cater to xenophobic views of uneducated masses to gain popularity
Shouldn't you be busy watching your women get gang raped in the streets by hajis while you sit back and think about how enlightened and tolerant you are?
INTO THE RAPE CAVE
DID YOU FUCK HER NOT?!?! HURRY THE FUCK UP NIGGA
bruh i cant even find a cringe enough image for this
>"hey you trying to chill sometime?"
>"yes, haha maybe, and do what (;?, etc"
you guys try too hard
>being an uglet
one of you fags go make this to the front page of leddit
when you get a match
you don't wanna text
you need to say something sincere like hey you look like a cool girl, I'd like to share some beers with you, are you free this weekend?
Text her again the day before to confirm, something like at what time do you want me to pick you up tomorrow?
Texting is losing your time, you want to share time irl and fuck her right in the pussy
>I could snap your neck without even breaking a sweat. You're less than nothing. You're a worthless piece of shit. I don't know if I would just fuck you or kill you and dump your corpse in a river. I'm dangerous. You don't want to fuck with me
DATING WITH /fit/
guess I should post the only remotely funny tinder dialogue I've ever had 1/2
This. Shit on her.