So I just started a new job doing commission based sales. Pretty basic stuff, get a little booth in a store somewhere, sign people up for credit cards, make 20 bucks per activation, blah blah blah, you know the drill. Can make good coin if you know how to sell.
Problem is, we have a strict policy that all reps have to wear a white dress shirt on the job.
White shirts to me scream BETA MALE and WAGE JOCKEY. They are what truck driving rednecks wear to court, they are the lowest common denominator of dress for people who have no idea how to dress nicely. White dress shirts are what 12 year olds wear to funerals and band recitals. No grown man should wear a white dress shirt with no jacket. Ever.
My question is, is there ANY way to make this work, Anything at ALL that can make me not look like a socially inept bumpkin?
I am dreading this new job because of this monstrosity.
is there any way a white dress shirt can look good?
White shirts are the shit, bro. They have to just not look cheap.
AVOID: poplin, gauze, polyester anything, tiny baby collars, forever21
COP: twill, oxford cloth, flannel, anything with a bit of texture, either linen or cotton. break up that plane of white with something interesting - like double chest pockets in interesting shapes with flaps
MAKE SURE: your neck size, sleeve length, and cuff size is correct. also tuck your shirt in if you're going to be wearing:
WEAR: jackets and possibly ties. no tweed unless you're wearing an oxford, no jeans because jeans look like shit with white shirts. get good leather shoes and good wool pants - stay away from black unless you've got high contrast features, stay away from chinos unless you've got low contrast features
Get an oxford cloth button down shirt. It's pretty casual so it can be worn by itself. Pair it with some slim navy chinos with medium to high-rise and cognac-colored leather belt and and similar colored non-formal dress shoes. Derbies in brogue or toe-cap flavor, or dress boots.
And put some fucking attention to the fit, that shit will fucking explode to mfa-core if you don't know what you're doing.
Unfortunately I can't wear a jacket, apparently it's non flexible. Considering wearing one when working solo. Rules are for nerds
Some people work for a living, kid. You'll understand when you grow up.
OK. Maybe i didnt explain the problem.
On a most fundamental level for someone to respect your pitch they have to respect YOU, it's why pakies who just read the script never make sales.
Making a deal is a state of mind and being an entry-level pitchman living off commissions puts you at enough of a physical and mental disadvantage to begin with, minus the shitty get up. People only respect those who are attractive, entertaining and alpha male, to be persuasive you must exude all of this in the brief time frame you have to make that first impression. I know this.
At best, white shirt black pants make one at best look like a struggling stressed out alcoholic or a overworked Japanese businessman but white. At worst you look like a high school student from some flyover bumpkin town at his first job interview.
Shit is so so so hard to pull off.
Don't hate too hard on a good polyblend. In the lower price range of white dress shirts a polyblend can lend some thickness to material, reducing wrinkling (especially sleeve wrinkles in tight cuts) and reducing transparency.
I think you can wear tweed without oxfords. That said, whatever footwear you choose has to look a bit clever, a bit polished, or pointed, maybe a different colour than black (no patrick cox wannabe circa 2002 shoes; you know what I'm talking about), or else you can stray into fedora territory. Keep it a little bit "uncomfortable", for lack of a better word.
Sorry to be the one to break this to you, but the rules have to be learned before they can really meaningfully be broken. You can't just splatter paint on canvas and become Jackson Pollock. You need to know why you're doing what you're doing or else you're gonna look like a bum.
I used to do this job. The best salesmen didn't care about what they wore, but focussed more on their ability to communicate.
They let their charisma carry them, not what colour shirt they wore.
It doesn't matter.
If you're alpha, you're alpha, people care about you, not the clothes you wear.
By being this hung up over a shirt, you've already displayed your insecurity of your sales skills. Focus on that instead.
Have fun doing the devils work, because a percentage of your clientele will have their lives ruined by you and your 39.9% apr. :) but its your conscience, so whatever.
You'll probably be caught for fraud too, just so you know
Sometimes a white shirt isn't just a white shirt.
Matilda Kahl wears multiples of the same white shirt with black pants. It's a self-imposed uniform.
Whenever I've worn polyblends, most of them have pilled, not allowed sweat to evaporate, or started to feel like sandpaper after a couple of washes. The not allowing sweat to evaporate is a big thing. I'd often get pimples on my back before I switched to all-natural fabrics. Maybe it's just me, but I'm never fucking going near the things again.
I wear a cotton undershirt. problem solved. As far a fabric durability, my polyblends actually feel softer over time then my cotton shirts because of the hard water in my area. Obv, with fabirc softener that problem goes away though