Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
Avoid asking these common questions:
>Is it normal for me to go to a club/bar by myself?
Yes. Stop overthinking this.
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking
>Brandon or Female Brandon
>Who is Brandon/Female Brandon?
A shitposter who's convinced he's ugly. He keeps posting his picture to ask if he's ugly and to ask for dating advice, only to rebut or ignore any responses he gets. Female Brandon is a girl who pulls the same shit.
Also piss off.
I posted a while back about my coworker. I asked her to dinner last week and she accepted. We ended up going out to a place downtown, had a few drinks and food, I paid. When we parted we hugged. The date was last Thursday.
I'd like to go out again, but don't know how long to wait or what may be a good idea for a second date (I want to indicate that I'm interested in her romantically, but not be too strong). Females help?
Guys, how do I crush this guy's heart?
I'm friends with this guy, and a couple months back he asked me out. I turned him down. I still like him as a friend though and we continued to do the friend stuff we did.
Now, I'm getting the idea that he still has a lot of feelings for me. A mutual friend confirmed this fear. He told this mutual friend that he was purposefully avoiding other girls.
How do I bring this up? Should I? I don't want him to think that he just needs to wait for me and I'll change my mind. I will never get together with him.
Be straight-up and earnest with him. Pull him aside at some point. Whatever you do, don't mention the mutual friend unless you've cleared it with them beforehand, or he'll hold a grudge because he needs something to blame. Tell him that you heard about it from "friends" and that you want to set the record straight with him. If he's stubborn, try to be a more maternal or sisterly figure, he'll quickly stop seeing you as someone to be attracted to. Best of luck.
I knows this probably falls under
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
But I have a female friend who, after a failed attempt of a relationship 2 months ago, has been getting a lot friendlier with me. A few nights ago we were at a party and while talking with other friends she said something about my watch, grabbed my arm and stayed like that for a few minutes while feeding me snacks.
Does that count as
>Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
or could she want something with me?
just talk to him maybe help him get over his oneitis by being his wingwomen
The girl I'm dating right now made me dinner on our last date, and we ended up having sex for the first time. I feel like we both enjoyed it a lot, I'll admit I've had girls I just had sex with and didn't call back, but I really like this girl.
Kinda curious, what kind of date do you think a girl would like to be taken out on? I'd invite her to my home, but she's allergic to gluten and I'd be scared of making something that gives her an allergic reaction (plus I'm not exactly Gordon Ramsay...). She's a really sweet girl, I actually like her and she wants to go out with me again when we both have the chance.
Is it weird as a guy to feel like your girlfriend is smarter or more life capable than you? I mean, I genuinely kind of admire her.
Why does my gf of a few weeks seem so focused on marriage, kids, and pregnancy? We haven't even had sex yet and she's talking about what she thinks our marriage would be like. She's not proposing we run off and get hitched or have a kid or anything, but she said she just likes to think and talk about it.
as a fellow black man, my suggestions
get a fresh fade, your hair looks all nappy and a bit untidy. not totally offputting but you could look more presentable. also fix up the beard to look nicer, maybe stick with just a trimmed goatee or clean shaven. also try not to post pics of yourself on 4chan, tends to be a bad practise.
you're not that bad looking, carry yourself with some confidence, don't be afraid to make moves like holding a girls hand and get used to talking to girls, you'll do fine.
Thank you, I've been thinking of getting something like pic related maybe without the line
Anyone here in a long term relationship? specifically 1 year and up.
How often do you and your significant other argue and how serious does it get? Also what topics do you argue about? money, other girls/guys, annoyances, etc.
Well lucky for you Gordon Ramsay has a cooking channel on Youtube. Also there are entire gluten-free cookbooks just waiting to be pirated.
And that's fine, anon. Everyone has their strengths, so don't be intimidated. Good luck.
Two and a half years here. I don't think we've ever really had an argument. He's pretty passive while I'm pretty bossy but still considerate of his feelings, and we have similar ideas about everything so that may be why - our personalities just fit together so we can avoid conflict.
1 year as of a few days ago here, anon.
She's so sweet. We don't argue much at all. We're very different people, but with a few common interests. She has a better memory than I do, but I know she'd never abuse it, so I trust what she says about those little details. Maybe I'm just extraordinarily lucky.
A lot of the time, arguments come from insecurities in other things. Remove those, and you see a lot of the problems disappear.
Not that anon, but long term is not a definitive term and is inherently open for interpretation. The OP chose to define it as 1+ years for the purposes of their question. Arguing about what is long term isn't productive - either answer the question or don't bother replying.
In the year or so we've been together, we've apparently had two "fights"/"arguments". That first one I was just messing around... but I have a pretty serious/scary sometimes and she took at as me angry at her (a misunderstanding basically... this was like 3 months in to our relationship, but apparently she considers it a fight?) , and the second was me legitimately pissed off at her about something disrespectful she did/kept doing (this, I actually consider somewhat of a real fight).
I think she's been annoyed at me exactly four times: once when i was drunk and offhand made an inappropriate comment about another girl (in my head it was an innocuous comment, but I said it out loud, and it was awkward as fuck given how drunk I was), once when I grabbed her ass in public, once when I made some comment that she took the wrong way (I can't remember what to be honest), and once when I was explaining something and was fairly brusque doing it (I probably accidentally made her feel kind of dumb--I suck at explaining things because I'm kind of intense in general). All of but one of those times I saw it on her face and mannerisms and instantly pre-empted it, brought them up, and dealt with/appologized before they became anything big.
She's a lot more avoidant about conflict than I am, and I just believe you should just deal with things the moment they happen. The one real argument we had was basically because I let something slide for weeks/months thinking it was too small to matter much, 'til eventually I just kinda proven wrong and snapped.
Being openly communicative about the things you, like, dislike, hate, and feel, goes a long way towards pre-empting and dealing with any negative emotions that might occur. When you know each of you is being open, honest, and putting yourself completely out there, it's a lot easier to be empathetic to one another and work to resolve things.
Thanks, guys. It's not going to be fun, but I guess that it needs to be done.
How do I phrase it?
I was thinking something like,
>"I'm worried about how you view me. I'm worried about how you're taking me turning you down. I like having you as a friend. But can you handle 'just friends'?"
Fuck it, I'll just find a way to make her want me.
Women are malleable, it shouldn't necessarily pose much of a challenge now that I've actually articulated a desire.
That sounds pretty good. It's sort of weird for him to try again after two months, a year or two maybe if he feels he has changed but man that is short.
Honestly I wish women were more straightforward but at the same time guys don't always take the hint.
Time to stop mulling about and wondering and JUST DO IT™ and see where the winds of passion carries me.
The manipulator post was obviously a joke.
To any femanon:
a) When you put on spandex pants and go out in public, what do you think we're thinking when we see you in it?
b) when you see other women in spandex in public what are your thoughts?
2) Say you're having a conversation with a significant other, not of negative manner, and you ask them about sushi and their verbatim response is "If I liked the taste of raw fish I'd just ask you not to shower" is said in a joking manner, how is that received?
From what my mutual friend tells me, he's been reading into things.
>She hangs out with me alone!
>She smiles at me!
>We talk about personal stuff sometimes!
>She laughs at my jokes!
>She said she didn't want to date me, but maybe she's changed her mind??
1a) I don't wear them in public unless it's with a longer shirt or tunic. In that case, I don't think they're really any different from pants
1b) I don't care, because why should I?
2) it's a joke, I'm not going get shitty over it. My boyfriend and joke in that manner all the time
I feel like you think all women are slutty, catty and oversensitive
1a.) I don't go out in spandex leggings.
1b.) I enjoy the view. I wonder if they realize how revealing it is.
2.) Honestly, I would be hurt. I'm awfully self conscious about how I taste and if the joke popped into your mind that means you've equated my vagina to fish before. Ouch.
Also I like sushi a lot so it's a double hit to make it sound like it's so disgusting. I mean, I'd understand that everyone has food they dislike, but it's so uncommon for people to hate sushi here (seaside with high Asian pop) that I would be taken off guard.
Girls why do you do it? I am a weak faggot and one look, a certain look can make me crazy about you.
I was happy minding my own business being single but a girl I met a few times gave me the look in the club. I can't stop thinking about her.
That's the thing that pushes us to create great things Anon. Symphonies, cathedrals, satellites, men on the moon... That masculine energy spurred on by the allure of the feminine.
Well, either that or strangling prostitutes in truck-stop bathrooms if you're so inclined.
Yeah, its my fault but I have seen this girl a couple of times, even every day at one stage but felt nothing.
But that look man, I don't know how to describe it. Made my heart skip a beat, I was sipping a pint, chatting to a female friend glanced around, our eyes met and bam.
It almost fucking evil, I don't want a girl friend or a one night stand I am not able for that shit but I am human.
I just jerk off more and try to forget it. And I would think the Cathedral would be easier than killing a hooker and getting away with it.
Actually all of those things are spurred on by political rivalries between then currently powerful countries, including those trying to curry and compete for favor with external organizations such as churches, trade organizations, or more recently international organizations with member states
Sorry, to reiterate for 1b) , it might not be the best question to ask you if you're a lesbian (i hope I'm not inferring wrong), I mean do women respect other women less for doing that, I assume it's considered about equivalent to wearing a really low cut shirt/excessive cleavage. One would think that it's equated to attention seeking?
I'll say this, making it as a joke intent was to point out a dislike of sushi, and I haven't really had equating of vag to fish, It's just a classic joke, but I'd be curious to see how more women think of that, would give me perspective if it could be worded much better to show intent as being just social commentary on sushi and not an attack on a specific womans hygiene.
Regarding my thoughts on women I definitely do not think they're all catty,slutty or oversensitive. I could have worded my original question to say "to women who wear spandex in public", as to not give the generalization feel. It's just as a man when I see that shit and it's a girl who looks good in it from a males perspective it's like "She has got to know that is gonna get her attention HNNNNG"
Except at least two of your examples were driven by politics in the form of the space race. Cathedrals often played into a measured effort by Catholic monarchs to win favor with the Vatican, always a good place to be in pre-modern Catholic Europe. And so on.
You're presumably a woman or some beta cuck, you'd never understand the concept of passion and to be a mover.
No, I don't feel like it's attentionwhoring. I might think it's inappropriate, given the situation, but I really don't care what another girl has chosen to wear casually.
>Regarding my thoughts on women I definitely do not think they're all catty,slutty or oversensitive
You certainly come across as if you do, and now you seem like you're in denial. You should probably think a bit harder about it and be honest with yourself about this
I can't really identify what I said that came across as sexist but I accept I'm limited by my own bias and perception if on a subconscious level, but consciously I don't generalize about women, I would say that many are oversensitive, but that's certainly not all, and while I'm no white knight, I recognize the double standards about enjoying sex being unfair towards women. Can you please select what I said in particular that made it seem like a generalization and not a question about a small niche thing that some women do? Otherwise I'd honestly have to accuse you of the counter being you think all men are misogynists, which may or may not be true but for argument sake I'm not opposed to the concept that stated something that was poorly worded to align with the intent, would just like to know what that was in particular.
>I'll say this, making it as a joke intent was to point out a dislike of sushi, and I haven't really had equating of vag to fish, It's just a classic joke
I'm a dude... but you realize that's the exact equivalent of if asked your girlfriend likes blue cheese and she responds:
"If I liked the taste of gross cheese, I'd just tell you to not to shower".
Kind of totally gross and crass imagery that's unflattering to say the least.
You're definitely a little off dude.
Reminds me of my friend who was in Las Vegas one day and he was talking about going out, and how expensive cover fees at clubs are when his girlfriend asks, "But girls can get in for free right?", and he just looks her, laughs, and says, "Only the hot ones". Awkwardest fucking moment ever.
okay so I have a bunch of matches on Tinder because I'm looking to actually be with someone on Valentines day this year. Thing is I just have problems with starting the convo. Girls or guys what are some lines I can use to really grab the girl's attention?
We have similar interests in things that you can share with someone, like taste in TV shows, but e differ when it comes to solitary activities. Otherwise, our personalities are different, but complementary.
I know it sounds wishywashy, but it was basically the vibe of your post. Your questions were somewhat leading, and seemed to be challenging girls to rebut your preconceived notions about how women would answer those questions. For example, 1b was inviting women to say how big of attentionwhores other women are, and therefore revealing the replier to be a catty, gossipy woman. I mean, you said it yourself that that's what you meant by that question
> I mean do women respect other women less for doing that, I assume it's considered about equivalent to wearing a really low cut shirt/excessive cleavage
If you'd asked what you meant in those words and a woman had said yes, then by default, she fits the exact negative stereotype of women. See how you come across as having already decided that women are a certain way?
>I'd honestly have to accuse you of the counter being you think all men are misogynists
That's really not that unlikely on 4chan. Half the posts here are by MRAs/redpillers/guys from /r9k/
>taste in TV shows
Absolutely 2015, Mr. and Mrs. Netflix and the 3 children she murdered before they were born, only 2 of which were his.
>that feel when circumcised
I guess I can understand that given the more relate-able analogy. I can see why it would be unflattering more so now. Regarding your friend that's something I'd totally say except I'd have a pause and say "which in your case, you're in luck." IDK my sense of humor is warped. I'm a nurse, trust me when I say this surgeons have the darkest and best jokes and I think occupation is relevant. Not that it excuses dickish behavior, but put yourself in my shoes, wouldn't your sense of humor be warped when you're exposed to some of the saddest, nastiest, most interesting things?
Ok I can agree with you to an extent, from your perspective I do agree I kind of wrote an answer into a question while still asking. Yes I do admit that when I see a girl wearing spandex in public and it's not in a setting where it would be merited IE gym, or yoga class I am immediately dropping the same level of respect as wearing a very revealing top (obviously a tank top when its 100 degrees out is fair), but here again I'd be talking context specific. I guess this falls on something we already all know and do, visual impressions.
>That's not unlikely on 4chan
You seem like a reasonable person and yeah I'm mainly a /btard and seriously the lot could use some thinning with the cuck/trap/cheating/MRA promoting faggots, and would assume thats likely a sitewide issue not specific but likely somewhat more concentrated on /b/ than others.
From your perspective, what are some things that men do that you would say give off particular visual impressions that you would think most men aren't aware of, and what those impressions are?
>From your perspective, what are some things that men do that you would say give off particular visual impressions that you would think most men aren't aware of, and what those impressions are?
I don't know if I could really give examples off the top of my head. This is really one of those 'you'll know if when you see it' sort of things. I saw you doing it, and I pointed it out to you. I'm glad you could gracefully accept my perspective without throwing a shitfit like many people here. You seem like an okay guy yourself.
Question for womyn:
If you were 16, and you worked with a guy a bit older who you liked and felt like he didn't care about you (he couldn't, really, since it would get him in possible big trouble for trying to date/hook up with you), what would he have to do to remain in your favor? Keep in mind you haven't said you liked him and won't be having a surface-level conversation about either of your real feelings anytime soon
black girl at work won't stop hitting on me and it's making me uncomfortable, because i'm not into her at all but she's still a cool person to chat with but at the same time that makes me feel like i'm leading her on (like oh we connect so well why won't you date me)
so far i've kept her away by subtly saying i'm not interested in dating anyone, i'm a loser etc, but there are girls at work I do want to date so it would be real weird if I keep saying this and then suddenly start dating random girl X
also her and I work directly together in the same department whereas these other girls kind of work with us but don't
tl;dr how to let a coworker know you're not interested
>see a qt
>talk to her
>a few days later she asks me for food
Is she taking advantage of me because she thinks I'm a beta provider or is she just looking for excuses to talk to me?
I think I made it obvious that I'm interested in her just by walking up to her and starting a conversation.
What if i expanded it to like commonly broken pet peeves by most men?
your id is literally a girl that will break the rules
This being said not a femanon but in response to >>16671373
Don't date coworkers dude. Literally ends bad every time, took me several times to figure it out myself, and that's negating the fact that the age thing LIKELY will get you in trouble and even if that's not an issue supervisor/subordinate dating is always gonna get the superior in trouble, and don't try to keep a bad idea on life support as you're simply poisoning yourself to eventually make a bad decision. Extinguish it asap.
ask her if she wants to grab lunch with you, if she says yes, bam you're on a date, and you seal the deal by paying for it and suggesting you hang out again sometime at the end
if she declines you were right
Tell her about how you're gearing up for the race war
>she asks me for food
That's fairly vague. I mean did she ask you to take her out on a date? That's usually a sign of interest, but you'd have to give a bit more context for anything to be determined
what? Since when was being a provider beta? I know being walked on and continuing to give handouts is beta, but there's a difference.
If you have to question if you're leading her on you're probably doing something wrong. Don't accept gifts or favors until you have a conversation in which plain english you state: "I think you're a great person but I do not see you in that way and would like to be strictly friends". Don't mull around the subject just be direct. Can't believe this is a hard concept, I mean don't you hate this shit when women do it to you? Also, be polite and don't have this conversation at the start of a shift, ask if you can talk to her AFTER work. If you say that and she continues you're off the hook to date whoever just be the bigger person and don't flash your happiness with someone else all over the place, if they continue to make you feel uncomfortable and you've tried all these things talk to a supervisor.
Also don't date coworkers! ends badly every time.
Still being vague. I mean did she ask you to go out to mcdonalds or some shit with her, or was she like hey can you buy me that twix bar? Either way if the conversation element is there and she seems engaged beyond just when you're buying stuff likely not being used, but setting boundaries is appropriate. Might have low self esteem and not feel like she's worth being taken out to a nice restaurant or something, who knows.
You didn't read the question properly, I was asking how I would remain in the girl's favor if she started to dislike me for not making a move, not about getting with her itself
Keep in mind this girl nor I are professionals, were young people doing a job
Oh stop hanging out with him alone. That shit would drive me crazy to. Girls for future reference if you and a guy go somewhere and it's just y'all he's going to think it's a date or you are interested.
This is for guys and girls:
A little while ago I was with my girlfriend and I was fingering her. I can easily satisfy her that way, but really want to try oral on her. The weird thing was that her vagina had a fairly strong, sour/salty odor (not fishy though, was very different) and it kinda made me chicken out and just finish her with my hand. The smell wasn't unbearable, but I'm wondering if there's any way to make it smell better, and also does it taste anything like it smells? She's not unhygienic or anything and when she gets wet, she gets VERY wet, if that information helps.
Also, is there any way she could improve the smell or flavor? Thanks.
>remain in favor
>reads: leaving my options open
If you REALLY intended just to want to be strictly platonic as a coworker then do nothing you wouldn't ordinarily do, because you don't change your behavior for friends. But seeing as you came here for advice I'm inclined to believe this is not the case. Also if you don't want anything there's no reason to give a shit if someone dislikes you for not making a move that's their own damn loss. You're literally contradicting yourself with asking how to give a shit about something you claim to not give a shit about while making it look like you don't give a shit.
TLDR don't give a shit/stop giving a shit
If you were hanging out perhaps she was simply hungry? Just gauge her interest with how she interacts with you when you're not buying stuff, but if it was one time I wouldn't even make note of it
I know i know I hate it when girls do this but she initiates every non work-related convo and I literally have to talk to her to do my job properly. pulling her aside after work seems like it might not go well (she probably thinks i'm gunna ask her on a date and then I drop that bombshell?) won't be well received and then the next shift will be VERY uncomfortable
ive never had a girl come onto me like this so I guess I don't know what to do. I just don't see how my supervisor can diffuse the situation without her directly saying something like "anon said you're creeping him out"
Here's the thing: I really actually like this girl. It's not going to happen I feel, but I'm not trying to keep any options open, I just want to enjoy a flirty, forbidden love-affair-of-the-mind, mutually, at work. I feel like this is completely harmless. She must know because of our age difference it won't be happening. I feel like we'd both be happy with it
Odor is caused by a few things.
Diet, and habitat.
It's kind of like a mouth in that regard. Nasty stuff goes in, nasty stuff grows, smell ensues. Basically, wash your hands well before fingering her, and have her drink pineaplle juice.
You can't be concerned about her taking it badly in the immediate or her thinking you're gonna take her out on a date, and your endgame is to let her down easy, so just go for that. You aren't a bad person, but if you prolong it you are doing her more harm. Make it clear you just want a professional relationship.
>I really actually like this girl
>I'm not trying to keep any options open
>I want to enjoy a flirty, forbidden love-affair-of-the-mind
Yeah I've thought all those things myself, sans the age difference because I've only dated women older than me thus far, but I promise you without fail you are assuredly poisoning yourself and I've been where you are now. It is not harmless. It's like cheating, it almost never just happens. First you smile, then flirt, then you start talking to each other, then it gets deeper, etc, eventually you're fucking someone behind your partners back. You may not agree but it psychologically holds, you cannot half-ass something like this it absolutely is an all or none thing. How many recreational heroin users do you know? How many addicts do you know? Yeah one and done sure, but I promise you once you break one boundary it loses it's value and you need more. I promise if you think you're smarter than others who have tread this path before you and that's the only logical argument you have, is that you believe you will exhibit more self control than others, you are assured to fuck this up. I promise you friend I look out for you when I say this, do not even tempt the idea in your mind. If it was just the coworkers thing I'd say bad idea but the legality issue is a shark compared to a house cat of working together. Do not pursue.
>She must know because of our-
She must nothing. You're the adult and you can't shirk responsibility of something to her. That won't work in court nor will it here.
She's of the age of consent. None such issue other than jokes from friends/ retarded social taboo thoughts
Your comparisons of flirting to heroin are pretty lulz-worthy, I get you're trying to help but surely you've sustained flirt-relationships with people before without fucking them? I've done plenty
Disclaimer: I love to eat the box, that's just the way I am, I like to be generous, as well as I'm a nurse and bodily fluids and what not don't really bother me anymore, that being said:
1) if she's on her period or about to start/finish it that may be the cause of a smell
2) If you have a weak stomach for some things, there is some minimal odor/taste at all times. Do this: sometime when you think you're "clean", spend a minute or two just cupping your balls then smell your hand. Now imagine a moist orifice and consider realistic expectations, and consider that you smelling your hand is nothing compared to the taste and having your face literally right in the vicinity.A minor bit of salty taste really isn't uncommon, it's actually normal. Now if you're drinking tomato juice somethings amiss.
3) Aim for post-shower/bath for your first few times to get acclimated to it, its an acquired taste literally.
4) She can wear perfume if it's an odor issue, taste issue I'd say she could eat more pineapple/sweet fruits and perhaps increase her fluid intake, but I wouldn't be as direct as to suggest it directly, sensitive subject.
5) If all else goes to shit, unless you're literally about to puke, put in the respectable 5-10 minutes as to not be rude, and try to swallow as little as possible if its bothering you.
I am a flirt by nature, but I also retain the sensibility of flirting with someone if i consider it harmless fun only if WERE it to lead to something that said sex/whatever was not a problem. You've clearly identified that it would be a problem were something to come of it, and I promise you doing so is a guaranteed way to sink your own battleship yo.
Have a system and follow it, if it's a bad idea, it's a bad idea period.
Thanks dude. She says her past partners haven't complained about the taste at all, and it's just the smell that's a little weird. And she was about a week before her period was due.
Well congrats! I guess I'd just say gauge your efforts by her response. Since you're already in a relationship there's no real expectation for greatness which is a relief.
Tips I'd say:
1) focus most of your attention at the top
2) Push your tongue down harder than you'd expect unless she states otherwise or unless she reacts better to lighter faster tongue motion
3) reasonably gentle sucking intermittently usually isn't bad as a momentary rest if your tongue gets tired
4) don't forget you have hands that can also do stuff like play with her tits etc
5) try to pay attention to what she's doing because it's not a turn on to be asking "is this good" every minute, but if you feel like you're striking out ask "does it feel better here? harder?" but really try to answer this with her body movements/etc.
6) some girls are cool with you trying to kiss them afterwards, some aren't, if you have a beard/mustache be a gentleman and wipe that shit off before you try to kiss her unless she makes it very apparently clear she wants you not to lol.
7) occasionally kissing inner thigh/around the area at start or intermittently isn't a bad idea, just going straight for it is albeit sometimes necessary, foreplay is foreplay for a reason.
8) even if you dislike it don't let it show
9) don't be like me and forget to breathe one of your first times.
Can't really think of anything else to add. Everyone says do the alphabet but honestly if you're doing good with up/down or side to side just go with what works.
>I'd invite her to my home, but she's allergic to gluten and I'd be scared of making something that gives her an allergic reaction
My mother has celiac, and I had to cook around her restrictions back when. Its easier than you think, and if you're ever unsure there are resources to know what does and doesnt have gluten.
Thanks bro. Will listen to your advice! And yeah she's against kissing afterwards but I'm against kissing her after blowjobs, so it's mutual. As for the breathing thing I'm a swimmer so hopefully I can go for a while without needing air. I'm good at gauging what she wants and she isn't afraid of telling me, so we're good with communicating (her legs shake like crazy the closer she gets). Anyway, thanks for the advice anon. You the real MVP.
If you've already had sex with a girl, I'm fairly sure it's a given that she'd allow you to cook for her given you're aware and respectful of her condition.
No it's not weird to see the best in your partner, in fact it's generally a good sign. If that shit fades it sucks. Hold on to that.
Well the goal isn't how long you can go without air, I'm saying remember to breathe, it's a matter of moderation. Yeah you can swim but you're not gonna do the best job if you try to make a distance in one breath right? I tend to run closer to the hypotensive side on blood pressure and so yeah I basically got light headed, but all was well. Just a minor learning experience lol. Yeah some women are different, I'm the same way, there's a waiting period from getting head before kissing with me but I've known a woman to basically pull me up and be all over me with my mustache/beard and not bat an eye, which I could not do the reciprocal.
OH HAIR! That's another thing, if you have braces (I never did) she should shave otherwise you are likely (not guaranteed) to end up with a mess and/or some accidentally pulled hairs of hers. If you don't have braces and aren't weak of stomach by all means do what you gotta do. I prefer neatly shaven at least, but that's just me.
go get em champ
She trims it but can't shave due to super sensitive skin. And I never needed braces either so we're all good. The swimming thing was more so a joke btw.
Thanks for your advice man. I'll be keeping it in mind when I see her next week. Her period is due within 2 and she's one of those girls that get super horny 2-3 days prior, so I gotta be prepared.
I'm going to sleep now bro. Thanks for the help.
Asked if she wanted to get lunch, she said yeah next week works, I suggested next sunday. No reply for about a day and a half now.
So either she doesn't want to, doesn't know her Sunday schedule and is waiting for some reason, or just forgot to reply. Should I send a probe soon to remind her or what? Normally I'd say she's not interested 100% but she agreed to lunch literally the previous message
So my current relationship is ending and i've become friends with someone else, not on an intimate level just always talking and having a laugh. This person doesn't know I'm in a relationship. After this relationship ends would it be immoral for me to pursue this friend, try and see if there's something there? even though they didn't know about the relationship do you think it would be positive or negative telling them about it?
Yeah, depends on the initial reason. Broke my trust, like cheating? Never. If it was more about where we were in life, maybe. If I break up with someone, I get to disconnect myself emotionally to cope though. It's hard to get back from that.
a.) I don't wear them
b.) I like da butt, but can't imagine being comfortable enough to wear them
c.) I would feel pretty shitty and gross if my SO said that to me, but we don't really share that kind of sense of humor. I also might find it vaguely annoying if I was asking them a legitimate question about something and they changed the subject to talking about how my body could be nasty.
I may just be self concious of my vagina though.
If I get a job I have no energy to socialize with people on the weekend, but if I don't get a job and make a living, I can't survive but I would have more time and energy to socialize.
How do you guys and girls do it?
Guys I need answers
This guy once told me that he liked me but I didn't feel the same at the time. But now I have feelings for him and I'm not sure if he still does. The last time I spoke to him was the beginning of last year and I refuse to initiate a conversation because of my ego.
I think this is a miscommunication but my friends believe that if he really did want me, he would've let me know and asked me out. Who's right?
We both like fantasy novels, and are kind of nerdy and introverted in a way.
But she's a lot more nerdy and introverted than I am, loves books way more than I do (library sciences major that worked in a bookstore for over half a decade), and loves music with a passion (has synesthesia and was deeply involved in choir all throughout school) and art. By disposition she's the sweet motherly kind that is confrontation adverse and likes to look after people, but she also has a deeply irreverent sense of humor.
And I like going to bars and drinking (Before meeting me she'd only ever been to a bar twice, and one beer would get her drunk. Now she can take two or three, I've slowly corrupted her lol), meeting new people, am way in to movies and video games, constantly seeking to experimenting and try new things (be it food, craft beers, activities, positions, whatever). By disposition I'm one of the nicest, most generous, and considerate guys you'll meet, but also by far one of the most serious and intense guys at other times. I can also be a deeply sarcastic and goofy individual that excels at deadpan and can do totally riduclous things without batting at eye. It's kind of a like a switch flicks between the three at times, and it catches a lot of people totally off guard.
Our base personalities and interests are similar to a point--especially in that what makes life fundamentally worth living and what we value most--but those similarities are painted in broad strokes, and the details of those are also very different and diverse.
>Guy tells you he likes you
>You don't like him back
>But later you get the feels for him
>You don't ever contact him first
>Your friends tell you if he liked you he would have told you that (which he did, and which you apparently didn't respond to) and asked you out (which would be dumb of him considering you apparently didn't respond positively to him telling you he liked you and that other signs--like you you never initiating contact with him--tell him you don't like him.)
Look, I very much tend to side with the female perspective (especially on here), but let's call a spade a spade here. I don't think this is so much miscommunication so much as you flip-flopping and expecting him to read your mind...
A lot. Our main hobbies (video games, cooking, shitposting) are shared, while we have some different interests that we pursue alone (I draw, he writes)
Probably the least compatible thing about us is musical taste
and like I said, it would have been dumb of him to do that considering you made it obvious you didn't like him--and that's perfectly fine.
What's not fine is you expecting him to mind read your sudden change of heart (especially when you're not even willing to do simple shit that shows him your interested like contacting him first)
If you like him NOW, the onus is on YOU to make him know that.
>"Hey anon I like you"
>"I don't like you tho"
>"Oh, k, nevermind then."
>"/adv/ pls why isn't he asking me out???"
Why would someone you outright rejected try again?
>b-but mah ego
Shut the fuck up. If you like him, reach out to him. He has no reason to try with you because he already tried and failed in the past.
When it comes to relationships, why does it seem that women are more geared towards argumentation?
I have dated multiple women that said they were bothered by the fact that "we didn't argue enough", which may just be evidence of my poor choice of mates in the past. However, my current girlfriend will still come completely out of left field to argue with me about fundamentally simple things, or things that really don't have any need for discussion, let alone debate. Without seeming chauvanistic, it almost feels like women are comforted by shallow discussion of topics that would otherwise be uncomfortable. Like, bringing something up and arguing about it "gets it out of your system".
This morning, wake up to girlfriend putting on makeup and getting ready while I hear the car running. I suddenly realize that our car is left idle in our drive-way unnattended, and someone could just walk up and take it if they wanted to. I tell her that she shouldn't do that because it's illegal (Which I thought it was, but apparently not in our state). She blows it out of proportion, taking it personally that I've "criticized" her for telling her not to get my car stolen.
I don't know any other way to phrase this question.
Girls and guys
I've never experienced this before, but as a 25 year old male. For the first time. I have a serious attraction toward a female friend of mine. I feel warm all over when we are talking, and we both just smile! Like, I didn't know feelings like this existed. It's great actually. I never want this to end. But that brings me to my question. I don't believe in fairy tales and that bullshit. I know life is a bitch, and likely, all of this will end at some point in the future. I understand that is just how life is. I'm just wondering how shitty that experience will be.
Here's how to phrase your question:
How do I deal with my girlfriend being more sensitive than I expect?
Some women argue, some women don't. Some men argue, some men don't. Understanding why other people act like this won't answer your question for why your girlfriend acts like this.
It's likely that you're attracted to these type of women since that behavior feels like normal relationship behavior to you.
I told her how I felt. The thing is, she recently came out of a long relationship. And isn't wanting to go back into another one right away. And I respect her position on that. She knows I care a lot about her, and she very obviously cares a lot about me. I think it will just be a matter of time. I made a joke one day about how I hope she doesn't friendzone me and she said "do you think I would do that to you?? I would never put you there :)"
Even though we arnt dating. I feel so happy just being around her.
I spend exactly half the week with my boyfriend, with one evening during the week and then Friday-Sunday. I'm an introvert, so the past few months or so have gone like this:
Evening visit: Perfect.
Saturday: Getting tired from social interaction.
Sunday: Can barely string a sentence along.
Monday: Too drained to work.
I work freelance and not being able to motivate myself to work on Mondays is killing my productivity. I'm tempted to ask him for a short break but I'm terrified of the connotations of 'break'. For the record, I'm the one that does all the travelling and packing/unpacking to see him. What should I do?
Thanks Anon, that is a much better way of wording it.
I wonder why it is that I'm attracted to these women, or if it's something about the way I handle these scenarios that unintentionally brings that out of people?
desu being fat and not being comfortable with being fat is such a toxic state of mind that i wouldn't recommend dating until you're at least mildly accepting of your body.
even if you succeed with women, being disgusted with your body will create lots of problems. i am speaking from experience. lose weight, get swole, you'll be happier.
>and I refuse to initiate a conversation because of my ego.
>I think this is a miscommunication but my friends believe that if he really did want me, he would've let me know and asked me out.
Didn't you already turn him down once? How would he know you've changed your mind?
Easy, don't use the word "break". Explain the situation to him like you just did in that post; you're an introvert, you need some alone time in order to relax and refresh yourself so you can handle your work, and while seeing him so often is lovely you need a little more 'you' time in order to keep everything balanced in your life.
You say you're the one that does all the travelling and packing, maybe suggest he travel to meet with you now and then to help you out with this feeling?
Appropriate occasions - Christmas/Hannukah, Valentine's Day, Anniversary, Birthday, Vacations in cities with good shopping malls/districts. Basically only days when it would otherwise be appropriate. Don't take cues from dating sims.
VARIES. Some women are comfortable with or can reference 4chan but don't adopt its more questionable attitudes. Other women will think even social justice blogs on tumblr are too problematic.
So I was texting this girl I liked last month, I met at UNI and I'm fairly sure that she likes me back but I haven't had the balls of telling her how I feel so we just kept texting and texting until I got drunk one night and I was texting her like crazy. I was telling her the story of that night and by the end of the night she told me "You tell a story like you're one of my girl friends". Once I awoke to the text, i stopped communicating with her because my logic there was that she friend zoned me.
Did I overeact? Should I text her back again?
I did send her a new years greeting after that and wishing her good luck on her studies this 2016, but that was it.
I would say that you're probably jumping to conclusions here. Get your balls and ask her on a date. Why let her go off of assumptions? It sounds like you're just so scared of rejection that you'd rather have nothing at all.
We have similar points of view and similar senses of humor. We also enjoy some of the same activities, although he is a lot more socially inclined than I am. Certain days he wants to go out and do stuff, and I just want to stay at home and shít post on the Internet, but he has quite a few friends he can hang out with at any given time so it all works out. Overall I would say we're probably 80% similar.
Dude, warming up the car in the morning is normal. And unless you live in a really shitty neighborhood it's incredibly unlikely her car will be stolen in the few minutes she does her makeup. In this instance you are being paranoid and controlling, and you would probably do best to not undermine your girlfriend's judgement.
Well, we don't have serious fights. Either we fights because of games (most of the times, which is not serious at all), either because of annoyances. Like, we live together and he forgets the fridge open, cooker on, doesn't clean after himself etc. They're not really fights, but more like complaints that at some point get annoying for him and me.
Not necessarily, most young people (I'm 20) have visited 4chan and do once in a while. Some to see what /b/ and the edginess is about, some because they actual enjoy it - like if a guy is into /lit/ and /mu/, we probably have a lot in common. If I had a guy to share dank /mu/mes with, I'd dig it. A lot! A red flag would be /pol/, and /r9k/ is an instant no-no, though.
I want to start a fuck buddy dynamic with my friend of about 6 years. My concern is the approach, as well as the possibility of us not being friends anymore because of it.
I jist want things to be thebsame expcept we add in sex. Neither of us are getting any. Im pretty sure theres a mutual attraction but ita not like we flirt so idk
>Didn't argue enough
>Read: We aren't having discussions
Honestly though, some women will pick an argument just to argue with you, sometimes it's just because they want to know you love them, other times they're having a bad day etc., I know where you're coming from though, I've had the handful of exes literally start a conversation that felt like hostage negotiations when nothing was wrong and afterwards have admitted stupid shit like they were worried i was losing interest. Honestly I've just learned since then to ask "Is there something I'm doing or not doing that's making you unhappy? I do want you to be happy" and go from there.
As for the car thing, would be largely environment specific, I've lived in places where I would and wouldn't do that, but this also has an element of respect for others property. If she's careless with most things of yours that would be a greater argument to be had, but if she is careful with things you lend her/let her use, then I would just state you have a difference of opinion and ask her not to do so with your car as that is your right.
Okay so i asked this girl out that i thought that likes me, she said no. So i tried forgetting about her and it was going well, then she starts initiation contact and started flirting with me, okay why not let me try again . Once again blown the fuck out. Once again i felt rejected. I was finally moving on until i was around her, then she starts writing my name and hers all over a piece of paper with hearts. Finally this is my chance, nope she barely responds when im texting her to hang out.
Why does she do this and why the hell do i keep going back, it hurts every time
Ladies why is it that you refuse to give me the time of day when I'm honest and sincere.
Now that I'm following a goal post formula to get your pussy I'm now swimming in it
As a bi guy, yes. Might be preferable to dating a solely gay man because we'd have a broader reach of shared sexual fantasies in common. The bi men I know are also better at charm, flirting and seduction than exclusively gay ones.
The one's you seem to want must be the ones who are hellbent on tying down the manwhore, hence why they weren't interested when you weren't just netflix and chillin', and hence success when you do.
What type of woman do you want to attract, and what are you doing specifically to get to that?
I'm a pretentious newspaper nerd who loves boner-killing discussions about the legal system and public policy.
How do act charming and playful when I need to instead of being someone who acts like what most people think of as like a boring robot?
If you keep making excuses, you'll lose your chance. It's not like it has to be perfect.
She's a shit person. Don't waste your time.
There's a difference between honest and too upfront.
>you'll lose your chance
but if I tell something like "want to go out with me when your back in three weeks from now?" it would sound overly stupid. plus there's always people buzzing around
It gives her more of an opportunity to reject you
I'm sure some woman out there finds him attractive. Others don't. That's how attractiveness works
There are no rules about this sort of thing, life is not a video game
As I said, our house is usually a mess, but when I clean, I clean for good and I like it being like that for 4-5 days. It usually is, but then I leave that there and he leaves that there and yeah.. House is dirty. But who cares as long as we have each other and can live in mess.
There's this girl who looks at me really often, but when we get in closer situations, she get's really cold and kinda tries to run away. inb4 I'm not the fedora supreme gentleman type, I'm considerded quite normal.
Im not a good looking guy but i have never asked a girl for their number, they usually just get it from a friend or ask for mines. If she gets tge number and initiates contact you're on track
A question for the bros. Signed your bro
So its it just me or when you meet a girl that you have interest in and it goes somwhere and you start talking regularly that's you get all posesive and shit. Apparently men fall in love in seconds and it takes women a week. I mean I've been txting this girl and she added me on fb and I'm like all possessive and shit and I see her talking about a dude and I be like nigga I break ya face. Anyone else
Flirt and make jokes then. If she brings up how she hasn't been laid in a while, say something like, "Yeah, me neither. Looks like we could help each other! Ha ha ha!"
And if she laughs too, then you've got the possibility. If she looks taken aback or says something like, "Yeah, too bad I see you like a brother" "or haha yeah though that could never happen with us" then abort abort.
Respond something like, "Yeah, it's too bad! That would just be too conveinent, and we deserve to suffer. Ha ha. We gotta work for it."
What? No. People get back in touch all the time. And if she does take offense at you speaking to her again, for some reason, you won't be anywhere different than you were before. Stop making excuses.
Girls: how many days straight of chatting for several hours daily on Skype with a female friend is too many before it crosses relationship territory? Or is there no limit on this as long as both people keep their feels in check?
>Apparently men fall in love in seconds and it takes women a week.
Also it's concerning that this is how you define love.
>no limit on this as long as both people keep their feels in check
This is my opinion. But I've also had guys who misunderstood. Just be clear about expectations.
I think it depends. I'm a huge proponant of hiding power levels. If he's someone who will just casually mention his 4chan usage in mixed company, I'm going to assume the worst.
It's honestly something that should be begrudgingly admited with a, "I'm not like what you think!"
My last boyfriend was also a 4channer, which was nice since we could show each other threads and didn't have to hide it. I know that there's a huge range of people who use 4chan, and stereotypes just from specific boards. And even between stereotypes on the board.
I go on /cgl/. And there are different assumptions you could make about me based off of if I was there for the jfashion or if I was there for the cosplay.
If a guy told me he was a regular on /tg/, I'm probably going to think I'd connect with him more than a guy from /mu/.
Girls: would you agree to go out for a coffee/to the movies
alone with some guy you met only a week ago through some
mutual friends, if you're not interested in him?
I can't tell if she's into me or if she's just being friendly.
Does she have a lot of opportunity to see you with mutual friends?
I have male friends who I only see in a group, because that's where I see them. I have other male friends who I don't have a lot of mutual friends with, so I can only really see them alone.
She can see me whenever she likes, we're all in the same
little group of friends. Also, a friend of mine noticed she's
very "touchy" with me, and with me only: little hugs or a punch
on the shoulder after a bad joke, touches my hair and stuff like that.
Girls, do you think it's mean if a guy friend jokingly calls your party nights out "guy hunts"?
This girl's the least likely person you'd expect to go clubbing in that way. She has several antisocial disorders, barely puts any effort in how she looks, and all her hobbies that I know of are the secluded and more intellectual kind. I'm honestly not even sure if she likes guys or girls in a special way.
She never tells much about her nights out, other than that she loves to get hammered with her best friend and stash spare bottles of booze at her place. She tells me about that detail so much I've taken to calling her "my favourite alcoholic". And then she expanded on that even more.
I want to have a little fun with her and try to fill in the blanks with the most outrageous stuff, though not seriously of course. However, I don't want to go too far and piss her off or make her insecure about what she likes either, though. Would I be prying or harassing her too much if I did that?
When is a good time to wait to ask a girl to be your serious girlfriend?
I've had a few fucks with this one girl I genuinely like, she's a sweet person and I wouldn't mind a few more dates with her. She told me she was on a birth control implant, we're both VD free so we agreed unprotected sex was on the table (something very enticing for me, I hate condoms but always use one first). I'd rather be in a serious relationship with her, even though at this point in our lives we're both pretty busy. we're both kind of odd people, i like that about us.
here's the thing: i've never had a REAL girlfriend. trashy hookups? check. encounters I regret? yes. anyone i'd introduce to mom? no.
so how do you go about this? when is a good time to ask a girl to be your steady girlfriend, decide to stay committed to each other, etc.
My friend, who is a girl, keeps asking me to bake her stuff. Is it just like banter or does she actually want me to bake her stuff? I don't want people to think I'm trying anything weird cause she just broke up with my other friend and it might seem strange.
I told my boyfriend that I would get him a Christmas, birthday, valentine's day gift.
He has mentioned several things. Now I don't know which gift to buy.
-Electric Bass Guitar $150
-Glass stein with pewter lid $50
-Mixer (6 channel) $100
I feel the stein is too cheap and the telescope is too expensive.
I'm scared that he doesn't want the bass anymore, because he mentioned the necks of guitars being too small. I don't want to buy customize guitar - that would be more expensive than a telescope.
I'm afraid of buying a mixer, because I don't know what I'm doing.
Any advice on what to buy? Anyone know about bass guitars or mixers?
I keep get connection error, let's see if it work now
It's not originally in English, but best translated it's something like this:
>Me: Man these holidays are so boring, I have like nothing to do for another whole month, I might go into coma
>her: You should bake me things when you're bored
Or few other times I be doing nothing because boring holiday and she text me out of the blue like:
>hey you should bake me this specific slice
Is it just cause she's bored and wants to talk or does she actually want me to bake something and hang out? I usually play it off as a joke because I don't want to seem like I'm thirsty or trying to get with friends ex girl, but if she was being serious I just realised I am being incredibly rude.
Allright, thank you for help. She just message me again after long conversation finish, in all caps asking for very specific muffin. I decide to actually ask her if she wants me to really make her some, does this come off poorly?
Since there's a month left until Valentine's Day, you have time to let him "catch you" looking up information about bass guitars and mixers online.
Dude needs to learn how to be a better gift recipient and share specifics about his preferences.
Hey girls would you give up Ina guy after a awkward first date? I took a girl to a range (it fit her personality I thought) and I don't know, awkward things happened. I cut my finger when loading a rifle, hand a couple of awkward silences, we occasionally couldn't make out what each other was saying, like something out of a bad romance comedy. I don't know if I should even pursue a second date.
>hit it off with girl on tinder
>get her number
>vaguely talk about meetup date
>get the vibe that she's not interested anymore
>a week later she messages me
>Lol guess you're not interested anymore?
>explain how I thought it would be weird to suddenly ask if she's still interested, say I'm still up for it
>"Mhm." "Ok." Mhm."
What the flying fuck? Why?
Huh she posted this after the date, I paid like 200 for shooting. Guess there's hope for me yet.
And she replied with "mhm"? Then you had to arrange a date. If anything, women are terrified of showing too much interest in a guy who doesn't seem to return it and she was already under the impression that you're not very interested.
>but I said that I am interested
What you say is irrelevant if you're not going to act on it.
>tons of dudes trying to hook up with this chick in club (she was like a 7/10 but the club we were in was devoid of attractive chicks on this evening, so she was first choice for most)
>the girl says to my friend she finds me attractive when he asked who she wanted in the club
>dance with her awkwardly for a bit, end up making out but she was reluctant and I think she said to me 'I've got more self respect than that' the first time I went in for the kiss but it was loud in the club so maybe not
>get her number
>leave to go elsewhere with friends
>text her 2 days later suggesting that we should hook up some time
>she replies 'hm maybe not'
>I say 'hm maybe yes'
where did I go wrong? did she think I meant sex when I said hook up?
>talking to friend/girl schoolmate at the start of the day about how she wants to get lunch at this place
>text her after she leaves, offering to go there together (it was an afterthought)
>we go there regularly, so seemed like no big deal
>unread without response, though she logged into the chat app multiple times and the message was delivered
>wait outside for a while for her or her response
>nothing for 10 minutes, which is most of the break time
>text her "your loss" and go on my own
>arrive at the food place
>she's just leaving it herself, also on her own
>ask her if she got my texts
>says she didn't get them
>tell her I was waiting for her, thinking she'd at least say no
>she just goes "oh..." and explains she went on ahead because she's in a hurry for her next class, which ends early if she's early
>begrudgingly put up with her excuse and chitchat a bit before we part ways
>later the message goes read without any further response
I'm still pissed. Maybe I have a right to be, maybe I don't. Doesn't make me any less pissed. Especially since it's not the first time she pulls this shit on me and leaves me hanging.
Girls, mind giving a bit of input on this? How likely is this "sorry didn't get your text" excuse to be true? If you logged into your chat app thing in the meantime, do you ever 'accidentally' miss unread messages? I honestly want to believe her, but I find it harder to buy her shit treatment and one-way respect every time.
If you're someone who uses this type of excuse yourself instead of outright saying "no": why? I just don't get it.
No need to move on. There was no romantic intent.
But she definitely saw them? I just don't get it. She always says she's brutally honest to anyone about anything with plenty of stories to back that up (some of which I experienced myself), but she lies to me with such a bullshit excuse? Just say no or even tell me to piss off if me or my plans are such a bother, sheesh. At least I'd have certainty that you don't want me and are deliberately being a shitty friend.
You might be able to accept just a "no." Or you might just think you'd be able to accept it. A lot of people then go on to ask why. That can be complicated, saying you're not interested let's the other person back out and say it's "just lunch" regardless of their actual intention. Sometimes the person might get really upset. Some guys think girls know for a fact that if he's talking to her, he only cares if it can potentially end in sex. Therefore if she doesn't shut him down right away, she's leading him on because she's cruel and just likes the attention.
So basically, people tend to be dishonest and lie to protect themselves from other people who also tend to be dishonest and lie to protect themselves.
Also most people hate conflict. When you confront someone with something they were trying to avoid, they will still do what they can do avoid it. She probably put it off not knowing what to say, then when you forced her to answer she went along with your first question claiming just to not have seen them.
From my experience there's no way to get over the feelings if you have to see them every day. Best you can do is just avoid contact as much as possible and try to bury your feelings, but they're still going to be there.
As for the anxiety, exercise and a new hobby worked best for me. Those only worked when I stopped seeing her every day and blocked out thoughts about her.
Girls and guys
I fell for a girl I can't have. She's a female friend, and incredibly special to me. I really really care about her. We are close friends, but I know I'll never actually have her for myself.. How do I get over this? Breaking contact is not a option.
>Anyone really, guys/girls
I've lived in really big cities for most of my life, but recently moved to a smaller area. I've been struggling with dating, and I think it's because I'm biracial (lightskinned b/w female).
I'm not really getting past "Pleasant conversation" with most guys, and the only people that have outright hit on me are way older native dudes or whole handful of way older black dudes here. Part of me is thinking it has to do with the fact that this town (medium sized college town) is predominately homogeneously white as opposed to the bigger places I came from, where even the white guys there were more comfortable with me.
I don't think the white guys my age are comfortable with someone who is half black and that's kind of putting a damper on things considering I just got a pretty decent job
Don't take this to mean i'm only into white dudes - but literally the only other minorities I've met out here are way older or way, way younger.
So I'm not sure what to do about it. Online dating was a bust as far as finding someone sane and compatible.
Do you have curly hair? If so - straighten it before you leave the house without exception
Straight hair is far sexier, especially so on mixed race girls
I'm often surprised at how much worse most girls look when they don't straighten their hair after I'm used to seeing them with straight hair explicitly
I have curly hair down past my ass. It would take me several hours each day to straighten it, only for it to curl up again by the end of the day. Chemicals fuck up your hair and scalp and make you look ghetto as hell so that's not really an option.
not opposite gender related, just wanted to ask
apparently i've had the same bed and mattress for the past 19 years since i was 2. should i get a new mattress and bed or hold it out till near the end of the year where i can then say i've had it for 20 years.
How would you suggest a guy start building some confidence after years of isolation. I have no friends and hate myself.
Girls always say confidence is more important than anything else, I'm not even sure what it means other than "think you're the shit"
What do you physically say to a guy to reject him when he asks you out?
>friend, not a stranger
>genuinely want to continue friendship
>he's not creepy
>want to be clear and not make excuses
>don't want to be mean
Just responding, "No." sounds rude. "No, thank you." sounds weird. "I'm not interested in a relationship right now." is indirect and gives him hope for a 'maybe after right now'.
With a guy? pretty easy. The guys I've been with wouldnt even question the issue if I just said I did - no theatrics, just asked if I came and I said yes and that was good enough for them.
how many chances do i give a boy before i stop acting first?
i've been texting him since winter break from uni. he sent me his class schedule last week and we were going to hang out during a 50 minute gap that we both have, but he blew me off twice in a row saying he didnt go to class and that it wouldn't be worth it to walk all the way to his apartment (which is true, if he actually skipped class...i'm kind of wary of that claim considering that it's only the second week of school and apparently he's already skipped 3 days)
when i text him he seems interested and engaged but i'm sure a lot of people can put on a facade pretty easily
Women does it bother you to be fapped to.
I guess I have what could be called the madonna-whore complex. For girls I like, I cant fap to them. Im attracted to the more innocent type and it seems like Im degrading them in my mind. However the girls that I dont like I fap to without a care in the world. I guess its that I dont have a problem fapping to whores because I dont feel like I can degrade them by fapping anymore.
The problem is that Im now looking to whores for satisfaction while looking at the girls I like as 'saints' not to be sullied. But shouldnt I only be looking to the girl I like for both.
When I first started dating a girl she had to tell me to touch her. Im not that bad not. If weve had sex I will only use those memories to fap to.
But really I just want to know if it would be bother girl if the guy she liked fapped to her. I wouldnt mind fapping if I thought she wouldnt find it insulting.
Fake it till you make it it's probabbly the best way to go.
I was in your position once, just do shit that your "old you" wouldn't do, talk to girls, say hi to people and start conversations.
I used to never start conversations in class unless someone talked to me, so I started doing so, and what do you know, that's how i met my current gf.
Confident male here, usually never have a problem with people ever.
Noticed 3 girls at work, every time they see me they pull out their phone or look down at the floor when we walk past.
Why do they do this.
Distance yourself a little, push those feelings on to another girl who is not a friend. You're probably lonely and developed feelings for a girl you're close too because shes cool and around you alot. They are not serious feelings, they will pass.
The thing is, I'm not interested in other girls. Like I never even wanted a girlfriend. But I just happened to develop fellings for her. And I'm not around her very much. She is just so good and kind to me, gorgeous, and just a interesting person. I understand the reality of this, it just hurts. I don't even think I can distance myself because she is always always texting me and wanting to Skype. She obviously cares a lot for me because she's told me how I make her feel happy. Just, she isn't ready for a relationship at all right now because she just left one.
Go on a date and tell him at the end of the date that you dont see him romantically.
Its like those euthanasia techniques where you give the person the happiest moment of their life and then shoot them in the back of the head.
At least if you go on a date he wont have to question what if you gave him a chance and he'll remember the date fondly and be more willing to not become resentful.
I'm glad someone thinks so :/
I get a lot of compliments on it. But I think it does probably intimidate people? Like there's a lot going on and people associate natural hair with frustrated black woman
For guys and girls:
How would you feel if your crush had a bf/gf and didn't tell you, but hadn't shown any romantic intent?
If they broke up with them to pursue you would you be okay with it or offended?
So i'm at the end of my relationship and i've become really close friends with someone and they have a crush on me, but they don't know i'm in a relationship. I haven't shown any romantic intent so I don't see how me talking to them is immoral on my part, but i don't know how they'll feel when i tell them i've left my partner. Will they be annoyed i didn't tell them? Even if i haven't shown any form of interest or intent on dating them?
How do I ask a male customer out on a date in a non creepy way? We've never talked before or even acknowledged each other's existence but we have crossed paths before multiple times, both at the grocery store where I work and at the apartments where I live. Apparently we live in the same place.
All genders: what's the most you've been let down by someone of the other sex?