Hey /x/. I don't come around here often, I used to stop

>>19581450
Your dissociating. The visuals your describing are similar to what you might see on LSD, or from sleep deprivation. It's usually an indication of something in its onset.

>>19581466
But could be a response to extreme trauma. Battlefield trauma. Childhood abuse, etc.

>>19581475
I don't think I've had anything that bad. If it was from trauma, it would probably occur closer to the trauma, wouldn't it?

>>19581475
Your subconscious is overwhelmed by something you've been through, and it's affecting you waking state.

>>19581479
Trauma is anything that changes you. Abusive relationships. Mental can be worse than physical.

>>19581489
Don't downplay your experience. PTSD and dissociation are almost always hand in hand.

>>19581481
>>19581489
>>19581493
If that were the case, I don't know why it would have only cropped up now. The only experience I could think of that might be the root cause is years old now.

>>19581498
Only other thing I could imagine, is your being targeted. Someone/something is trying to reach you. If you went through stuff earlier in life, did you deal with it? Or bury it?

>>19581509
I didn't really deal with what I was talking about, but it started to feel like it didn't matter to me anymore. I figured it was in the past. But I haven't thought about it for years. I wouldn't have imagined that would be a direct link.

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>>19581509
And then, there is the ever present option C, your going crazy. Early signs of losing touch with reality. Hope you find out.

>>19581513
Subconscious is hinky. Stuff we effectively bury, or shut out, can come back in bizarre ways. We may have decisively dealt with them in one sense, when in reality, it still eats at us.

>>19581518
So how would I deal with that? Professional help? I can't exactly reach any closure with the person I associate it with anymore, because they're gone.

>>19581518
Then when everything is great, we aren't happy. You build detours around things. And over them, in your conscious mind. But they are still in your way. One way or another, your mind will lead you back. It's dependable that way.

>>19581522
Just need to talk about it. Cognitive behavioral therapy is very effective. They've perfected it with Vets. It helped me. And someone tried to murder me.

>>19581539
No LARP. Attempted murder, really. Just happened to be a schizophrenic, so no jail. Bastard. Deal with your past trauma. That way it won't eat at you from afar.

>>19581543
Good advice. Thank you, I'll see if I can dig some of it up and put it in the light.

>>19581450
Have you introduced something new into your life? Maybe you are more involved in politics? Maybe you read something about how the monster machine controls us all? Maybe you are starting a new job? Anything new in your life that wasn't really present before? New activities, research, reading material, physical stuff, change of residence?

>>19581572
In all honesty, there's been a lack of really anything in my life. I haven't been doing anything at all. Maybe that's it?