Apparently schools are closing for the August 21st solar eclipse.

If they were planning something they wouldn't close the schools retard

>>19445046
For children to witness this once in a life time celestial event?

Oh wait, that isn't crazy enough... They've been implanting children with subliminal messages to make them Manchurian candidates, and the eclipse is the trigger for them to go into super soldier secret agent mode.

I just read that Big Ben will be closed for repairs for 4 years starting on August 21st. I'm getting more and more paranoid as the days approach.

The eclipse around here is such a big deal they closed schools from early June to early September.

Something very suspicious is going on.

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it's the lizardman apocalypse coming for us

>>19445046
This date really is making me worried, i feel like i am going to disappear even in my dreams i keep seeing myself in a hospital bed with my family around me.

it makes sense to avoid the responsibility of some kid looking right at the eclipse and to enjoy it at home.

>>19445205
no worries anon. a dream like that is just symbolic to you, whatever your subconscious mind is working out. it could simply mean you desire more support from those around you.

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school's out here morons lelelelelet's show em how we do this

>>19445184
Holy shit, they did that where I am, too! Something is definitely not right.

>>19445299
thanks anon you made my day today i feel less stressed out now about it.

>>19445181
interesting...

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Probably so the schools don't get sued when the retarded children inevitably look at the fucking corona of the sun and get their retinas blasted by god

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>>19445184
I laughed way harder than I should have

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>>19445046
This eclipse will be special. Don't believe any of NASA's excuses as to what occurs.

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This was produced a year before I was born. Fuck I'm getting old

>>19445046
Can Eclipses grant wishes?

>>19447010
>wormwood

who/what is wormwood?

>>19445181
kek, I'm more concerned we'll have no bongs for 4 years. How will we be able to tell the time?!

>>19446951
This

I know you yanks never had a eclipse before.
Remember to wear these shades you can buy for a buck now anywhere. The UV light is still very very strong and you can get permanent sun specks in your eyes or go blind if you look at the eclipse for too long without protection.

We had one in Germany when I was like 12-13 or something. We all got these shades from school beforehand.

>>19445181
And what significance does a bigass clock tower have?
Enlighten me.
>>19446951
My school handed out these UV blocker shades when we had one in germany in the 90s.

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>>19445181
"They" know (pic related).

>>19445046
>Another one of these threads

Sage in all fields, this crap is more overdone than the Bruno bullshit

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>>19446951
^THIS^
American schools are so fucking cucked nowadays you can't even bring a peanut or nail clippers. If you nibble a Pop Tart to look like a gun you get expelled for life. If you make the classic lame "lava volcano" science display they call the bomb squad. And god fucking help you if you call someone a fag, or say "traps are not women they are gay men".

>>19446951
>Probably so the schools don't get sued when the retarded children
>oh it's not just the retards
>the schools that are closing think EVERY kid is so stupid, they will look at the fuckin Sun
>this is where we are along the Idiocracy timeline
>somehow, in 1979, kids made it through the fuckin eclipse with teachers just TELLING students, "don't look directly at the Sun" and they somehow followed simple instructions
>no generation of blind kids

>>19446951
Lost

>>19448027
I got detention because I didn't eat the free hotdogs they gave out during a spirit week assembly. They didn't even let you use ketchup or cheese, it was just a hotdog in a bun.

I am going to stare directly at the eclipse this time, I don't believe establishment normie fags.

>>19447919
Wormwoood is a sign of the apocalypse according to the Bible. It's the name of a "star" (probably a meteor) that will "fall Into the ocean and posion all the water"

>>19447919
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Artemisia_absinthium

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>>19448083
It has to eat all the eggs, or else it gets the hose again.

>>19445205
>>19445205
I keep having dreams where I am heading to a funeral, but the only family members who are coming with me are ones who are already deceased. Pretty spooky.

>>19445078
This, in Europe about 20 years ago the same happened, for us to see what almost no living body will ever see.

>>19447919
http://www.sws.bom.gov.au/IPSHosted/neo/des/overview.htm
this is what i found.

>>19448090
redpill me on this, i've been sungazing for about 4 years but i still can't bring myself to face this eclipse

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>>19448094
>Oceans turn to Absinthe
>can't live long without water, but..
>entire planet goes out trippin balls

>>19448611
It's just alcohol you retard

>>19448613
+10 cool points, Todd. You can now go back to school and share with all of your imagin(ary)ative friends.

>>19448613
thats like saying juice is just water

>>19448629
ayyy hoo am i to judge? a lil suggy here, a dash of vitimin c there, i ain't no juice/water discriminator

>>19448628
>>19448629
>DOOD ABSENF IS TOTALLY RAD DUDE HAHAH DUDE DRIGS LMAO
Kills yourselves

>>19445046
They're planning to look at the eclipse, idiot

>>19448760
>DUDE PARROTING MEMES
>DUDE NO OPINIONS OF MY OWN, LOL!

>>19445046
My balls smell like cum.

nothing is going to happen

just teachers dont get paid enough to control kids chimping out during a eclipse

>>19448083
Tip: lunch food or free they testing you lil niggas your guysare like lab rats. Don't eat lunch food get your own

>>19448083
>hotdogs
>ketchup
>cheese

You animal

I wonder how threads were back in 2012 when 21 of december was approaching. Was there all this paranoia just like now?

>>19448768
That's odd, my breath smells like it.

LET THE SUNSHINE

LET THE SUNSHINE IN

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>>19448540
if you know your flat earth, then you are aware that the moon is not a solid rock but a transparent thing that emits its own inner light, meaning that in a lunar eclipse the moon turns red by itself. In a solar eclipse the moon DOES NOT block the sun's light, it FILTERS it. You get direct energy from BOTH celestial bodies, which is why they want you to wear those glasses that would block it.

>>19449209
yeah but they were mostly meme threads, people are taking this more seriously

>>19449239
What a bizarre coincidence, my ass smells like cum too.

>>19448034
the whole point of public school is to make docile cattle, not educated citizens
the drugs they forcefeed to every last child that shows any will to live just makes things worse

>>19445046
They are trying to summon Chin-Chin.

>>19445046
>>19445307
Wtf here too, the government moved a holyday supposed to be celebrated tomorrow to August 21 without any apparent reason as to "make weekend longer", but so many days ahead? I mean come on. I'm starting to feel spooky now.

>>19450130
I mean I'm not even American.

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>>19445046
Nothing, they just don't want to face the consequences of a growing number of stupid kids watching the eclipse directly despite beeing said not to do so.

>>19448760
i bet they love you at parties

>>19445046
It's still summer retard, schools are closed.

>>19452510
Not everywhere, retard. My local public schools opened Monday (and now my morning commute fucking sucks again).

>>19445046
Schoooools, out, for, summa!

I don't know, but I finally was able to achieve telekinesis yesterday. Slightly. I probably won't be moving any X-Wings out of any swamp any time soon.

Am I joking?

America is 241 years old
Total eclipse lasts for 2 minutes 41 seconds

>>19445068
this guy is right

>>19453778
EVERYTHING WORKS JUST LIKE A CLOCK
JUST AS IT WAS CREATED TO

>>19449915

Lol I love you for that

There will be games; there will be a ritual in every room. Names will be cant. Some of them may have experiences planted in them! Who among them will collect the set? Gotta catch 'em all. POKEBALL GO GO WAOOOOOO!

>>19449269
Remove yourself from the gene pool you irredeemable retard.