I'm going to die soon, if there anything I should do to

Hey senpai, whatcha dying of?

>>18988298
sleeping tablets and alcohol if all goes to plan

>>18988302
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I thought you meant you had a terminal illness. well, suicide case is also interesting. well, where do you want to go when you die? like, what are your post-death goals?

oh shit did you already do it? I was gonna give you advice.

>>18988310
I guess I just don't want to be alone, I want to see and meet other people (ideally not in Hell)

>>18988327
I'm still kicking if you have any advice.

>>18988329
i got bad news for you

>>18988289
Fuck dont die like u planned. Go kill some terrorist and enter Valhalla

>>18988329
Well, if you're really just looking for a fresh start, I think that's what you'll get. I'd advise you to keep in mind what your destination of choice is as you die. Whatever a person thinks about as they die, they go to that.

As in, whatever your soul is yearning for, and is in your mind, that's where you're going. You won't go to Hell unless you want to. And by want to I mean, if it's in your mind that you deserve it and on some level you believe you will go to Hell--then I suppose you would.

But in actuality, you will go wherever you want. However, if you don't have something solid in mind, then you'll be all fucked up and confused. If you want to just roll the dice, you can roll the dice.

>>18988340
Adding onto this, a God will appear and judge you. You will interact with your God, whatever that may be. My overall advice is to get something in mind for what you're going to be up to when you die. Have a strategy.

>>18988340
I mean, I've tried to be a good person and I don't think I've done anything that warrants complete eternal torture and suffering. I'm also a little religious (not to any particular one but to the idea of a God) and am dying a virgin (by choice) so that should work in my favor a little right?

>>18988336
Wish that was an option but I can't get firearms here and don't have the time or motivation to conjure up an extensive terrorist extermination strategy.

>>18988363
I'm interested in why dying a virgin should be relevant, in your ethos? No, of course you won't go to Hell, that's silly. But why the focus on virginity?

>>18988369
I might just be a prude but to me it shows at least some sense of resistance towards temptation.

>>18988377
So, you are killing yourself because you're sad, not out of guilt, anger, or fear. But also I think not because you're backed into a corner either. You're just doing it because of depression, correct?

Get some money to pay Charon for getting you through the Styx (preferably gold) don't forget to tip him too

>>18988385
yeah, the thought of having to keep being here all the time makes me feel sick - I've felt this way for a long time and I don't think it will ever change.

>>18988396
Ok, will try to remember to put some change in my pocket before I go.

>>18988402
have you tried having a wee bit of a near death experience? sort of dipping a finger in before you dive in? like, stick a fork in an electrical socket. you won't die, but it'll sort of expand your horizons.

>>18988402
You should definitely give your life away. No one will help you. Sure, they'll make themselves feel better by giving you cliché advice but they don't care.
They're selfish like everyone else. Enjoy the sweet release of death, my friend. The only freedom anyone ever has.

>>18988422
I've been close to death a couple times, I almost got crushed by a truck when I was younger and recently tried to give myself bad nicotine poisoning. The latter just made me fade out for a while and I felt very weak and nauseous but very calm at the same time. I feel optimistic for the beyond though.

>>18988428
Optimistic.

>>18988427
Thank you, that's probably the kindest and most genuine thing anyone has ever said to me about this. The 'just keep going and it will get better' or 'think about how other people will feel' rhetoric is really awful sometimes. I just want to be free from this corporeal body and all its earthly burdens. I just wish I could have found a pact partner locally before I go.

>>18988430
Yes, do you think otherwise?

>>18988431
Why the fuck would you need a partner to kill yourself? That right there sets off a red flag to me. It seems to indicate that you are just going to kill yourself because you feel lonely.

>>18988437
And a virgin...

>>18988433
No, it's just odd to hear a suicide case say they're optimistic. If you were optimistic I don't suppose you'd be killing yourself.

>>18988444
I meant optimistic for what lies beyond this life, not my current circumstances.

>>18988455
What are your current circumstances?

HE'S DEAD GUYS

>>18988289
There are infinitely many things that you could experience upon death but you use your life as a point of reference. If you need god and angels to make sense of the experience you'll get them, but you might have to suffer through some shit before you feel worthy of being with them. You can chase any experience you want. If you punished yourself in life you might continue doing so in death. When the moment of death comes, just try to relax and dream the most beautiful dream you can imagine.

>>18988473
Not a he and I'll be here for a few more hours.

>>18988458
I constantly self-sabotage and feel like I shouldn't be here as if I'm trying to escape my own body - it's really hard. I have faced any extreme difficulties in life but I can't be here any longer.

>>18988484
You're a woman that's gonna kill herself because you're lonely and a virgin? You know that you could solve those issues super fucking easily right?

>>18988501
I'm not lonely, I chose to be a virgin - don't fixate on this fact about me because it has nothing to do with my suicide. It's an easy conclusion to make but it isn't the correct one.

>>18988484
Stay with us anon, I'm sure u want to know what is beihnd woodstock mistery and some others. Dont leave this world, please

>>18988506
Okay so why are you killing yourself then? I have read the thread twice and still don't fully understand your reasoning.

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>>18988513
Me either. I feel like she's hiding something from us. At any rate, I crucified this burrito to save her life.

>>18988289
As I said, don't leave us but if you are truly sure about it... What about trying to summon an angel? There are instructions in some threads in /x/. Livestream it btw, I'm sure it will open your mind and you will stay alive

>>18988513
I just haven't lived up to my own expectations of what I thought I could achieve and the person I wanted to become. I'm always on edge and feel like a fraud in my own life.

>>18988523
What kind of expectations did you have for yourself that you failed to meet? Why do you feel like a fraud?

>>18988520
What site would be best to livestream it from? I also don't want to get doxxed either.

>>18988518
Thanks, thats a cute drawing - is the burrito sentient?

>>18988289
watch it after you're done
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cLo-Ntf9yBA

>>18988534
Yes.

>>18988525
I had hoped I could stop this feeling that I'm always pretending and restraining myself, just pointlessly floating through life. I didn't have any exact expectations but I had hoped to be somewhat successful and now I've deliberately ruined my chances. I think I must have BPD or something but I've been too embarrassed to seek help formally. I don't think its great to have that shit on your record for the sector I wanted to enter anyway. I'm just burnt out.

>>18988523
If you're not living up to your expectations then lower them. People put far too much pressure on themselves. You don't have to be the best. The wise man knows that deep down he is every bit as much of a rascal and villain as the worst of them, but forgives himself. You are the only friend you will ever need. To make friends with the 'real inner you' is to commune with God.

>>18988539
How can I watch it when I'm dead, also that video was really lame. Was it meant to mean something? The whole Dead Kids Foundation thing got really stale when you realise its just static effects and distorted noise.

>>18988289

I'll let you in on a little secret.

If you suicide, it doesn't end for you.

It ends for you here, but *you* will no longer be here.

>>18988289
Believe in Reincarnation, for instance, I recently found out I'm the Reincarnate of Julius Caesar. With Reincarnation your life can span over thousands of years!

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>>18988550
they just want you to think this way
a true meme war

ill be waiting

>>18988551
Hmmm..... what did he mean by this?

>>18988544
>I had hoped to be somewhat successful and now I've deliberately ruined my chances
How did you deliberately ruin your chances?

>I think I must have BPD or something but I've been too embarrassed to seek help formally
If you are on your way to kill yourself why not try to get help first? You are at a point where you have absolutely nothing to lose, right?

>I don't think its great to have that shit on your record for the sector I wanted to enter anyway
What country are you from? Most first world countries are fairly forgiving when it comes to mental things like this if you go through the help process and you end up being defined normal by a therapist/psychologist in the end.

Of course there's also some countries/jobs where it would be a no go. What kind of specific sector did you have in mind?

>>18988553
Waiting... for me? Are you a nefarious presence?

>>18988544

So step over your anxiety, senpai.

Yes, it can be that simple, if you make it that simple.

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OP, the burrito has committed suicide in the exact way that you plan on doing so. He did it for you, so that you may live.

>>18988560
ill just help you undestand few things
like you are made more for flow than actually being a free will thing

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>>18988553

It's more like this.

>>18988552
I hope I'm reincarnated as an animal, like a beautiful persian cat who lives a pampered life or a parrot in the rainforest - seems chill.

>>18988564

>like you are made more for flow than actually being a free will thing

Your kind never tires with this game, do they?

>>18988562
I feel bad now, the only way to redeem myself is to join him.

>>18988575
A true Romeo and Juliet story.

>>18988564
I don't quite understand, are you just LARPing?

>>18988575
I think you missed >>18988556

>>18988289
Try to build a strong ego, i don't know if there's something after death, but if there is i assume it must be hard (if not impossible) to maintain consciousness together. i'm guessing a strong ego could help.

>>18988556
If I try to seek help they might try to stop me or institutionalize me against my will, don't want to give my location away but there's still a definite stigma here. I wanted to go into the intelligence/law enforcement services - obviously a high level of security clearance and responsibility is needed here. So why would they want a nut case like myself.

Record a tape or livestream

>>18988589

>>18988561

You have to be able to look yourself in the eyes and smile, anon.

Nothing else in your life should be more important than that pursuit.

>>18988595
Just BEE myself right?

>>18988591
I would if someone actually gave a good site that I could livestream on and talk to any viewers. :-)

>>18988601

No, pursue being better than yourself.

Every day, if even in just a small way.

>>18988589
>If I try to seek help they might try to stop me or institutionalize me against my will
You seem fairly smart. You could just start out going to a therapist and saying that you have depression. Just to test the waters, you know? They won't stop you or put you in an institution for something minor like that. Then if you eventually feel comfortable you can open up more and more.

>don't want to give my location away but there's still a definite stigma here
It is pretty funny how you are ready to end your life in a few hours but you don't feel comfortable giving away which country you are from.

>I wanted to go into the intelligence/law enforcement services - obviously a high level of security clearance and responsibility is needed here. So why would they want a nut case like myself.
Anything more specific? It depends on which specific sector you are wanting to join. I know that a lot of law enforcement services are acceptable of previous mental illnesses as long as you have been deemed clear for a few years, anywhere from 1 to 3 years depending on how severe it was. Not to mention that there's people who have BS'd their way through the final psychological screenings.

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Burrito has been barred from Heaven, but has been given angel wings. His condition for admission into Heaven is that he save your life. If he fails to do so, his wings will be torn from him and he will be cast down into the fiery pit of Hell for all eternity.

Ok roughly 5-6 hours remaining, I want to livestream but don't want it to get taken down or reported, a VPN will probably suffice(?)

>>18988620
Well that seems pretty unjust, also how does he hold a harp without any arms?

>>18988622

Enjoy your lower plane.

>>18988289
Well first sorry about my bad english. Second, most of abrahamic religions punish suicide with "hell" or purgatory. Please, I'm really sure you dont want to be in these places. Purgatory is sad, more than life. Just staying there, in the void... No, please, dont suicide OP. Also, reincarnation is risky... I cheer u up to praise to some God, Goddes or whatever tonight and then sleep. Tell us your dreams tomorrow, I'm sure your guardians will come to prevent that suicide

>>18988622
You could probably stream it on youtube as long as you don't put anything about it in the title or tell people about it.

>>18988624
It may be unjust, but it's just the way it is. He is permitted to hold the harp by divine magic, solely to increase the irony of his situation.

submit to Christ.

>>18988627
Oh wow, trying to get the moral high ground with esoteric cosmology bs.

>>18988637
How can I be sure that he will forgive? Or that he is real?

>>18988645

I need no such thing.

Morality is a flawed concept.

Self-evidence is the only way to truly reach you.

>>18988650
I met Christ in my past life. I know he's real. Just do it.

>>18988631
Yeah but jewtube automatically uploads an archive of the footage, I'll try to figure out a way of preventing that and making it private.

>>18988666
Okay, your trips suggest otherwise but I'll take your word for it. How does one submit to Christ exactly? Do I need to say/do something specifically?

>>18988666
Meet Christ, 666, anon is Lucifer confirmed kek.
Anon, tell OP how bad is the hell

>>18988676
I'm Satan.

Even I have learned to submit to Christ.

>>18988668
For someone that wants to die you care an awful lot about a lot of things. Are you sure you actually want to die?

>>18988679
Satan fambro, can I get some weed or like some heroin. I mean, I know you can do it. So... just as an act of Christian charity? That would be great. Thanks so much in advance. I'm going to want a direct manifestation. Thanks again bruv.

>>18988694

>I'm going to want a direct manifestation.

You must first do what the Creator could not.

Forgive him.

>>18988694
God stole my powers. He really tricked me into giving them up to Jesus. Jesus was my soulmate and I was a girl in my past life. I loved Jesus with all my heart.

>>18988702
I'm not OP but I would definitely forgive Satan for heroin. Anyway,

>>18988673
OP if no one else is going to answer you, I'll answer. To submit to Christ just say "I accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior."

>>18988709

I mean, they killed him for it.

So you sorta dodged a bullet.

>>18988687
Yeah I'm positive, I guess I'm just paranoid about someone I know irl watching it.

>>18988714
Me and Jesus both become reincarnated, instead of going to the afterlife. We keep our memory when we die. I remember when we met. He saved my life. I was just a 13 year old girl and people wanted to hurt me. He saved me. We made plans to meet in our next life, and we did. Only, we switched genders. He became a girl and I became a boy. She ended up turning on me and betrayed me for power. God and Jesus believed that they could trick me into stealing my powers, but they didn't know I was testing them and I will get my powers back when I die.

OP, there are a lot of crazy people in this thread, but I thought you were going to accept Jesus?

>>18988722
Okay, enough derailing the thread.

>>18988726
I'm not sure who to accept at this point, I wasn't even raised as Christian or anything. What if I die and it turns out Buddhists were right and I get btfo by Buddha at the last crucial moment.

>>18988731
Thats why you dont have to suicide

>>18988722

Yahweh isn't God.

He's a jealous logos (caretaker, if you will) who binds any that do not conform.

>>18988718
It is amusing that you are willing to kill yourself but you are so concerned about something like that. Is there anyone in your irl that you think in particular would watch it?

>>18988731
>btfo by Buddha
Oh man, you're adorable. Why don't you accept burrito? He has the most at stake for you after all. Say "I accept burrito as my Lord and Savior." And uh... when you get on the livestream... would you... would you show us your boobs? I don't mean to be insensitive, I'm just saying. I just think it would add a lot to the experience for all of us.

>>18988731
>I'm not sure who to accept at this point
Maybe it isn't time for you to kill yourself at this point then. Spend some time researching and soul-searching to find which out what you need to accept. It's not like the opportunity to kill yourself goes away, it's always gonna be there.

>>18988736
highly unlikely but I wouldn't want them to connect the dots.

>>18988742
I think I would want to at least try to retain the last bit of dignity I had in my final moments, I'd be willing to answer any questions and interact with viewers though.

>>18988750
I think the fact that you are having feelings on this matter I believe you should take advice from >>18988749

>>18988763
I'm not stalling this shit any longer.

>>18988777
Nice trips.

It's weird because I've been kinda having the same feelings, not exact obviously, but I wanna see how things pan out. See where life takes me. All aboard.

>>18988679
how to achive some sexy succubus to dominate me lord?

>>18988762
I would really like to meet you, yeah. I mean, it's no problem. It's just... something about you is really, well I don't mean to be crass but it's really turning me on. It's a pity you're going to kill yourself and burrito is going to burn in Hell. You could use tiny chat dot com. I mean... I really don't want you to die but I'm kind of intrigued for this. You're very engaging and charismatic for a woman, I mean I don't mean to sound sexist, but it really is unusual, maybe that's what I find so attractive. It's a pity you're going to off yourself. Oh well, I'll be watching your stream.

>>18988762
Fuck your dignity. That is already gone since you are gonna commit suicide. Show us some titties.

>>18988289
Let me tell u sth OP. Once I ate sleeping pills, about 10. Felt asleep for 22 hours. In my entire dreams, I talk to myself about how thrash I was, then my guardian appeared and after slapping me he told me some things. Sleep, ask your guardian in high voice to visit you in your dreams.

>>18988790
Well, I'm flattered - who knows, maybe we'll meet again someday. Yeah, tinychat seems like a good place to start it isn't too regulated and I used to use it years ago.

>>18988799
You only took 10? I have 40 tablets and a low weight/height so that should help.

>>18988800
When are you gonna do it and where will you post the link?

>>18988806
Yeah, it was a fail but couldnt get more... Dont do it, its shit

>>18988811
Should start happening around 8/9pm GMT if I get everything ready. Here's the link tinychat DOT com (slash) dlmdv5

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>>18988822
Ill be watching.

>>18988822
OP actually delivered.

>>18988822
Have you tried goetia? It mightgive you the strength you need

>>18988958
I don't think summoning demons would be a good idea at this point.

>>18988980
Chose a sigil and meditate on it asking mthem for guidance. Goetia is absolutely real and Lord Neberius has truely changed me. You just need to strong in spirit and ready to make a deal

>>18989175
Naberius*

>>18988289

prepare your meal for tomorrow's D&D session? or ask your mom to prepare it for you

>>18989191
huehueheuheu

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>>18988302
Suicides become civil servants (for eternity) in the afterlife.

Seriously though, the Soul Control Matrix will lay a massive guilt trip on you for offing yourself. They will try to make an example of you so the other trapped souls don't start getting any ideas. The bad news is that the afterlife is every bit as phony and manipulated as the physical world. We are all trapped here and killing yourself doesn't get you out of the greater Soul Prison.

If I had to tell you ONE thing to remember in the afterlife it would be that IT'S ALL FAKE. EVERYTHING you see there is a fucking charade.

Just like this world.

>>18989289
Well, at least being a civil servant sounds like a reliable source of employment.

>>18989289
Where are you getting this information at?

>>18988302
don't do it, there's a good chance you go to hell.

>>18989478
surely 99% of the world's population is in hell?

>>18988289
Death ends fun. There are things still living souls can do. That dead ones can't. Why on earth, would you want this? Don't say I didn't warn you.

>>18989500
I wanna be a ghoul, don't stop me senpai

Op suicide is lame. Just stop putting yourself in the same bullshit scenarios.

They just told me I know you. I'm crazy though. Don't do it. It gets bearable.

>>18989555
If you know me, then who am I? How do I get past this?

>>18988581
Are you new to /x/? Of course he is

BUMP any more contributions?

>>18989773
No... I think she dead

Bumping to keep alive until the stream

>>18988289
>>18986917

>>18989792
She ain't dead, she's right here.

https://pastebin.com/FXcsRFZr

Never too late to see who you are.

>>18988289
Read, say, and do what you find in Romans 10:9-10. Ask God for help, because it's impossible to do without him.

>>18989836
Oh God thanks

>>18988289
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYsnPNBg7j0

>>18989900
wew

>>18988289
Hey OP, are you still there? NickDigger here, I would really like to talk to you.

OP here, still going to deliver just ran into some unexpected circumstances. Will happen at 10pm GMT if all goes as planned.

>>18990335
Prove that you are OP by saying something that you said in the chat.

>>18990344
spanish commune hobo life collecting oranges

>>18990388
Can you come back into the chat please? We would like to talk to you again.

>>18990403
Is it happening?

>>18989493
99% of the world population commited suicide? i wasn't aware of that.

Were you studying for being a nun?

Your eternity is decided by the state of mind you are in during your final moments when the DMT floods your system. I suggest you simply comes to terms with your life.

>>18988329
You only get one life.
Dumb piece of shit.

>>18990775
No happening. To sum things up she made the chatroom at 4:10 PM.

We were a handful of people chatting about a bunch of things and trying to make sense of the situation, getting to know each other, etc.

She was getting ready to do it. She was in a hotel, she showered, put on nice clothes, she had a letter written out, she talked about how she was gonna overdose slowly on pills and alcohol.

At 9:01 PM she wrote "ill be back in an hour".

Then there was some more talking and a guy was implying that she idealized the situation and was waiting for a lot of people to show up and that everyone should just leave if she turned her cam on to stop her from killing herself.

At 9:50 PM she comes back and writes "changed my mind, im doing it alone" and "sorry for wasting your time". Possibly because she got annoyed with what people were writing about trying to stop her.

Then >>18990335 was posted and >>18990388 did seem like it was proof but it could have just been someone trolling that was also in the chat at the time.

Now it's 1:00 AM(1 hour past what the last post said) and still no sign of her. From what she was saying and how she was I believe(and hope) that she didn't go through with it.

Goodbye anon if you see this. You are a good person, godspeed.

Cerebralpoison, if you change your mind and you need someone to talk to, you can write a throwaway email account here and I'll check back tomorrow. We seemed to have a lot in common.

>>18990949
Cheers m8

>>18989543
Suicide is lameness
And it comes with so much gayness

>>18990913
your haiku sucks

>>18990949
Hope it too... If not... Well, be free to fly anon

Whopsy.
Well one more pointless post won't hurt.
You take life with you. The memories and understanding.

Do if your gonna die, think hard of the things that you thought were worth it. Its gonna be hard to change your mind when you get there.

Suicide isn't a escape. It's another place to feel and think and exist as any everything that can be. If you thought any part of you was loved or cared for, if you shared a moment with another while you were here, keep it with you. There is no greater sorrow then being every thing but who you are. Even the pain because it is you and your soul knows it belongs to you. So take your joy with you.

>>18990949
Dude it wasn't anybody trolling. It was her. She said she had an unexpected delay of some kind so maybe we got divine intervention. I believe if she had done it she would have delivered like she said in >>18990335

I believe she is still alive.

Cerebral, I hope you are in the looney bin. Please post here. We love you. I need you to be alive so you can marry that nice Danish man. Also, burrito needs to know whether he has to go to Hell or not.

>>18988289
You'll get into purgatory guaranteed. During the puritan era Aleister Crowley redesignated purgatory (being by yourself for eternity until you touch the light of God) as Hell.

You'll be received in heaven, you just need to embrace faith sometime between now and the end of your time in Purgatory.

>>18988289
So, what were you looking for in the end exactly? The lack of closure and the stuff you said as "guest11" has had me thinking about this for a while. Did you come here hoping to have people tell you "do it bitch" to help you with the last bit of courage you needed to go through with it and had it backfire because of the two autistic NEETs and the weird shit they were saying or something? What's your plan now?

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>>18988340
This is not Discworld.

>>18988363
Catholics consider suicide to be one of the worst sins you can commit.

>>18988289
As for you OP, I will not tire you with telling you to try to find God first, just consider the 4chan classic. pic related

>>18994765
things didn't go to plan, still mulling them over - still sure that I'm going to do it just don't want negative energy there.

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Theres a whole book written about the art of dying in the 15th century https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ars_moriendi
Too bad you go straight to hell because you are making a suicide.

>>18988302
Say hi to God for me

Tell him he's an asshole

>>18995219

Hey, anon here. Firstly, I wanted to apologize for making sexual comments to you, and for my out of place attempts at humor. I was just coming off a full night of tripping on cough medicine, and my mind was not in the right place.

I prayed for you, and I felt incredibly guilty that I didn't do more to stop you. I will keep praying for you and I want you to know something. I don't want to watch you kill yourself, but I think that I was meant to come into this situation.

I have faith, based on my prayers, that something will happen through God to transform your situation. After talking to you I feel like I look at you like a little sister and I love and care about you the way somebody would a family member. I don't expect that to make the difference, but I want you to know that.

I'm going to check the chat now, but if you don't want me to be there I understand. God bless you.

>>18994819
guy in pic (and anyone who agrees) definitely do not get why people kill themselves.

>>18995303
I agree, that picture is dumb yolo tier shit.

>>18995219
I don't think you are gonna do it bitch. You're just a girl that wants attention

>>18995325
wanna bet?

>>18988289
Submit to Christ, but if you're doing it just to get into heaven, don't bother. Christ isn't just some image of a guy on a stick that the Church uses for its own selfish purposes. Get to know the real Christ and acknowledge his truth. It's your turn to die for him.

>>18995348
How do you do this exactly?

>>18995332
Yeah. I'll bet my bank account that you won't do SHIT

>>18995351
Does Christ still live within you? if he does, it shouldn't require any explanation. If you sold him to the devil, I guess it's too late.

>>18995367
get ready to pay up buddy ;-)

>>18995351
I guess what I'm saying is, if you kept the spirit of Christ alive within you, you can just ask him how to do it and he will answer. If you sold your soul somewhere along your life, you're already dead and should just make the most of whatever you sold it for, whether it was sex, wealth, fame, or whatever.

>>18995382
I don't think I've ever sold my soul for anything, I don't really have any vices - I'm just lost and miserable, seeking his guidance really.

>>18995387
Seek and ye shall find!

>>18995387
But not from a Church. They just want your money.

>>18989352
out of his ass!

Is she ok?

>>18998080
For now, I think so.

>>18988790
You are a colossal dipshit

>>18988527
Why would you care if you're dead