So, I'm calling an exorcist tomorrow, to join in the battle

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>>18376550
obviously you havent been on /x/ for the past 5 years. you have to masturbate. It makes the whole situation super akward for any and all demonic or evil presences and they get the fuck out. It's too ez.

>>18376550
>>/tg/

>>18376564
Hahaha, that would probably work. You're right, I'm new here.

Still, given that I'm joining with Christians, would that be acceptable? I'm practicing Nofap.

>>18376564
That actually worked, hahaha!

>>18376550

say "Avaunt thee, Satan, get the behind me in the name of Jesus Christ."

And have faith that he will.

And I bind that demon in the name of Jesus Christ and consign it to the Hell prepared for it.

Go in peace and serve the Lord, Anon.

>>18377315

Then masturbate afterwards and ask God to forgive you. He will, because of what Jesus did.

>>18376550
First, understand that there's nothing supernatural going on. What we commonly refer to as ghosts, gods, demons, angels, and so on are archetypal entities which reside in the subconscious mind, and from which your own conscious identity is formed in an admixture. Rituals such as exorcisms, the pillars, the seal, and so on are just a way of creating suggestion for manifesting your Will. This means that the specifics of the ritual are unimportant as long as you buy into them -- and if you understand what I just explained, you don't need the ritual at all.

There are some very simple traditional rituals you can perform, however, which will give you peace of mind. The simplest is to sprinkle salt in each corner of the room. Salt is a purifying agent. In the morning, sweep up the salt and dispose of it, then replace it with fresh salt. For extra protection, put a piece of cold iron over every entryway into the room, including doors, windows, and vents. The easiest source of cold iron are plain iron nails; just make sure they're not steel.

93

>>18377318
You have problems

Anyhow, masterbating never got rid of my demons. I have a feeling that they are succubus, but there is one male who is a faggot.

>>18376550
*fartz*

Bless your house, and read the bible. God bless, Jesus won't let them mess with you if you ask for his help.

Also get a Archangel Michael candle and Mother Mary candle for protection. You will be fine.

>>18376550
So uh, yellow pages? Uber? How are you gunna 'call up' an exorcist?