On November 14th, 2016, I had what I can only describe as a religious

Today, I baptised myself. I had a sit-down with God, after he called out to me through a telephone message for my mother. He told me we would have a sit-down on November 18th, and we did. I’m skipping over details because it feels so raw still (i’m open to questions).

I had a terrible knot in my heart today. I felt like I could die. (It felt like I already did after meeting the ALL after the Kundalini thing.) I transmuted all the fear and doubt that I had living inside me, and I visualized pushing it down through my spine, past the Tiphereth, down into Malkhut. Polarizing the duality of life. Pure consciousness of mind, Keter. Pure formless void, Malkhut. In unison. Within me.

This was on the back of 3 constant days of getting my ass kicked by the ALL, mind you, not just God, but how he manifests his will. My body was an aspect that I met. It grounded me. As I was getting the details explained, as I was a rider in my own mind, my body focused me into the Truth of what was occuring. He kept me conscious. He didn’t let the fear take hold of me as I asked if I was alright. I met feelings and themes a wave of conscious beings.. A gradient of emotions that were totally aware. I felt them come through me and manifest as guides, as open arms. Revelation.

I guess I’m God, or an aspect of him, incarnated on Earth, in the imminent days of his wrath. It shames me to say this, taking pride in something I never knew about, or had a connection to. All I know is, Love was the first message I received. Trust. I’ve never trusted anything, because it had all been taken away from me, I never felt like I could try. I’ve felt ashamed at myself for being such a loser my entire life.

Realized I should trip.

I’ll answer questions now, if anyone is interested. I just felt like I should say this, considering how weird things have been lately. I keep second-guessing myself still, trying to come back to reality, trying to explain it as a psychotic break. Even still, I can’t ignore the chain of events that has transpired.

I’m being guided by God’s hand down a path. I was told that it’s alright to be broken still. Truth has to be ALL.

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It's in my head too.
The transmission.
He always speaks but we never listen.

We are not even present.

>>18346495
>We are not even present.
I think it comes down to rationality now. We have to teach to see the Truth in things. Not to be beholden to absent meanings for generations of people who never had a chance to see what Truth was. I feel immense change.

We've lived in despair for too long. There's a balance that has been missing. When the balance is tipped to far in one direction, it rebounds. Cause and Effect. The Laws stand through ALL, including the most powerful manifestations of evil.

This is how you develop a new Law, by the way. You observe yourself, consider your flaws, create a way forward, embody that aspect, and grow throughout all of infinite time with that as your filter. Rationale, Logic, Reason, and Truth. Love and Fear, together, tempered by those previous concepts.

Everything in existence is about experience. You have to appreciate your own works to truly understand them.

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>>18346508

Ok

>>18346469
Not lying. This happened to me almost the same as well. Had a freakout .Especially when someone is using magic against you. Still I'm here where you are.

>>18346905
It feels like we're being prepared for a shift. To carry a load.

Had to resist the urge to simply post "fuckin' gay." and leave.

Honestly though i've been going through a wearing existential episode recently, on a level i've never known. To have so much of what i considered "me" and mine shattered so quickly and yet still find myself holding to a plain and seemingly ghostly, yet factual Hope.

Seems you've made the breakthroughs i crave. I need to be honest and reach out to the Creator, but i have so many conflicting beliefs about It.
One quarter of the day I am ecstatic and comfortable in life, and then as i lust greater progress, my grip tightens into harshness and i am filled with rage and intolerance.
How could the creator use someone as emotionally allover the place as me? How could i receive message and actually carry it out with how much i fluctuate? At my heart i just want to be Good and sow Goodness, yet then i go outside again and the world bathes me in its negativity, to which i mirror often.
I want to do good but It is hard to keep myself to it alone, and there isn't anyone i truly open up to whom could help give me a nice reality check slap. I feel anyone would see me as crazy and reject me if i told them the truth of my thoughts and feelings. Many already do.
I just want to sow goodness Op. Is that juvenile? Ive wanted to do the opposite and inbetweens as well, but there has been no stability in decisions for either of those. I feel i can only be stable in goodness but i must first learn how.
What am I misunderstanding

Hey the 14th was my birthday, good day for me I bought return to arkham and skipped work.

>>18346466
This has happened to me as well. It is amazing how God reaches out to us in these pristine moments of clarity. Although the emotional and cognitive sensations often fade after his touch, I have been permanently changed at least a few times by these events, which was probably his plan all along.

If I could sum up what he has revealed to me in one sentence: everything has meaning.

Every action you take is consequential. We have great power, and utilizing it is as simple as believing. Cheesy, I know, but it is the truth. Also, as a side note, respect for God and his universe goes a long way.

Good luck on your journey, anon.

>>18346466
this describes me spiritually, almost to the letter. OP, can you give me any details as to how you felt leading up to your awakenning?

I'm unsure who God is anymore, and I don't know if he's on my side or not. Im not sure if the creator even picks sides. But when I was a kid, each night when I went to bed I would see an abundance of light come through when I closed my eyes. It's not something I really noticed until I got older and the light was gone. It's hard to explain, but last night I saw it again for the first time in a while. Anyone else know what I'm talking about? It's like the light or darkness within your body can actually be observed. And love is the key it seems. I'm glad you're finding your way, OP.

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>>18346466
>>18346467
>>18346469
>>18346508

>>18347085
It's science

>>18347070
It was like a cosmic thunderbolt.

I can see the moments that lead up to it, the framing, the timeline, but it felt completely out of the blue when it happened.

It felt like pure love, initially. It got a bit scarier as the days progressed, not in a terrifying way, just... Awe. Purpose.

I should mention I can actually feel my body vibrating. I feel electric.

>>18347072
I've had a 'background noise' in my field of view my whole life. I rationally placed it all together, during these chains of events. Initially dismissing it as "just photons messing about in my corneas or something". It wasn't.

Something was communicating to me. With lights, trying to get me to recognize the pattern.

Every time I close my eyes now I see variations of the all seeing eye, metatrons cube, and other symbols implying God. Base geometric shapes.

>>18347105
I feel an almost dead emptiness, or a convulsive feeling of intrusive empathy most of the time.

Anything like love feels wrong and the precursor to emotional damage.

>>18346979
>What am I misunderstanding

Expression. Who are you?
Know thyself, if you want to get corny.

I'm looking at God as a being that craves connection. He tests us, gives us hints. Those who are apt notice.

>>18347112
Fight.

It was never about good vs evil. It's all the same. Who are you?

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Threads like these are the reason /x/ is SHIT.

>>18347136
I look back to 5 days ago and think on how easy it would be to stay ignorant.

That's why I feel so much shame.

>>18346466
God is so hilarious guise a real joksters xd

>in this moment cats and dogs are drowned, abused, killed and skinned
>kids are getting raped
>people are killing themselves in awful ways (hanging, jumping, stabbing)
>other people are getting murdered
>some people are born crippled or live all their life in horrible painful times

what a jokster god is lul xdd

Dude...you're like...my soulmate, I know how you feel all to well.

>>18347149
That's why change is coming.

>>18347151
>I know how you feel all to well.
That's my problem. I never knew how to feel like this.

Positive emotions are new to me. Like I said, I felt absent from the world up until the 14th.

>>18346979
>How could i receive message and actually carry it out with how much i fluctuate? At my heart i just want to be Good and sow Goodness, yet then i go outside again and the world bathes me in its negativity, to which i mirror often.

I reread your post and thought it needed more of an answer.

Renounce. Introspect, observe and renounce. It really is as simple as that, and I feel like such a fucking fool for not getting it.

>>18346466
Just to describe the Kundalini part, it felt like a jet of pressure shooting up through my back into my head. Bubbly, almost. I'd say it was like energy, but it could be a purely physical process, I don't know.

The other part, the downward path. That was pain.

>>18346466
Religion is social construct, spirituality is where its at as it doesnt envolve dogmatic beliefs or rituals, its really simple be of service to others, love, treat others as you would want to be treated and forgive yourself and others thereby stopping the wheel of karma, love and light be with you always.

>>18347205
I just used religion as a descriptor.

I'm highly critical. I've always searched for the deeper meaning of something. That includes religion. I look at the silly interpretations, the lies, all the orthodoxy that doesn't get to the root, and I reject it. I rejected it years ago. Human institutionalized religion is a sickness, and it has been corrupted.

The only reality is Truth.

>>18347201
>The other part, the downward path. That was pain.

I should add to this, that it wasn't an automatic process. I had to want it. Grit and bear it. It sucked.

>>18347217
Were you in constant "contact" with God during the whole experience?

How different did you feel afterwards? Can you say you could continue with a moderately similar life as you had before or did this completely alter your path of life?

>>18347222
This is what truly scares me.

Like I mentioned, I've always had a 'background noise'. I thought, through most of my life, that it was normal.

I see now that it wasn't. I think God has always been with me. And I look at my life, and my failures, and all I feel is so much shame. Yet, all I get in return is love. It's terrifyingly awesome that I can't really describe it.

>How different did you feel afterwards? Can you say you could continue with a moderately similar life as you had before or did this completely alter your path of life?

I'm so conflicted. I can see and hear reassurance, but I just don't see it. I've always been blind, somehow, absent. Like I never really was. It felt like nothingness.

>>18347230
>I can see and hear reassurance
I can feel and hear reassurance*

>>18347208
Read into the law of one brother if you seek universal truth.

we are ourselves, as we have always been, this life is one of many. The goal is to keep becoming more peacefule and stop the reincarnation process

What do you think about The Bible?

>>18347144
Shame?

So are you saying you don't feel acceptance or sympathy to something you believe to be inferior to your current self?

Don't sound very enlightened to me..

On a serious note. You might have fallen into delusional schizophrenia. I'd suggest you visit a shrink just aa a precaution

>>18347193
Again you mention negative feelings towards your "unenlightened self"
Your delusion is clearly born out of looking down upon the person you are.
Brother I assure you. Lying to yourself is not the answer. And every day is a chance to change yourself. You don't have to make up stuff like some kind of kindergarten child to get acceptance from your fellow peers. People won't love you for your RP but they will love you if you put serious work into yourself.

>>18346466
How can you be sure that it was God?
Could have been something sinister, they tend to mask themselves as followers of light.

>>18347650
>>18347646
Like I said. There's a conflict inside me that I don't think will ever go away. It's telling me it's okay to be broken. Becoming something more while never losing what you were.

>>18347690
I have this very same thought. It kills me to think that way, but I can't disprove or prove the idea one way or the other. All I know is I feel love and compassion. My critical thinking keeps getting in the way. And I know it's that analysis that got me to this point, but I don't know how to merge yet.

uwu

>>18347650
OP's shit is pretty whack, but self-congratulatory positive thinking is twice as deadly as believing you're in communion with God on the phone.

>>18346466
>I met ALL
But anon, you haven't met me yet. I'm pretty much you. And it pisses me off to see you going through what I went through. Although, I didn't get my ass kicked, because I'm not a little bitch and I don't take being judged or lectured lightly. There's a lot I could tell you, but I guess you'll find out on your own. All I can say is don't put all of your trust in anything. It's easy to get misled, even if the path seems true, the truth can slowly change into a lie without you noticing until it's too late. And you'll be made a fool.

>>18346466
Time to go to a psych ward and get yourself medicated. You are legit schizo.

>>18347729
If it were that simple, I would. I feel the pull of something greater.

>>18347693

Where are you from?

Judging from your post, my own experience, what others are saying and current world events, it appears something global is happening over a particular time period.

It appears, we collectively as a people are 'waking' up, God is revealing himselves to us steadily,

We, as a people have been heavily oppressed, by our Governments and foreign invaders by means of, wars, drugs, debt, idolatry - anything Sinful. We are oppressed by sin, because we have turnt from God.

As when the Israelites of the Old Testament were oppressed, when they sinned and turnt from God, he returned to them and forgave them, with the notion to be their God again, should they cleave to him.

I think this reflects in modern age.

I believe this is its entirety, this next statement is my pure assumption and based off of my own interpretation and understanding and should be taken as opinion.

I believe the Israelites, who eventually were led into captivity as dispersed into the world (throughout Europe into Western Europe, eventually America too.) and populated these lands, as the bible states Israel will return in the end days. I believe most Western nations are descendant from these 12 tribes of the Old Testament.

The spiritual awakening means we could be the Israelites.

>>18347795
I was born from a Jewish mother in America.

>>18347801
Yeah, you're most likely an Israelite. Don't follow Jewish teachings, no offense to your mother.

Jesus is the Son of God.

There's periods where I feel like my whole body is electrified. All outside thought is shut-out, and I just exist. Receiving. It moves around, sometimes rebounding through my legs and lower abdomen, sometimes pulsing through my whole body into my head.

I've also had pressure in the front of my head for a few days now, not to mention being pretty sore all over.

I just feel like describing this.

I'm wiped out from all this.

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I have questions about Gematria, when used with the value of a name, if anyone has knowledge on the subject.

How accurate is it?

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>>18347956

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>>18347957

>>18347956
Dare I ask why?

>>18347967
Read

>>18347986
No

>>18347956
Nigga really? Did you type in 'my name is ben' to see if there are cool words to reinforce your belief that you're the chosen one? Why not just type Ben? Did the results from that not appeal to what you want?
In response to your question, it's as accurate as any other link between anything else. You're bound to find something meaningful to you in anything. Look wherever you feel is right for you when you seek something, but don't go expecting to solve life itself beyond any doubts.

>>18348027
I typed in my full name, got a value (652) and compared that to other words/phrases that also share that value. That's how Gematria works. My name is not Ben.

>>18348030
Oh. Sorry Slim Shady, I meant no disrespect.

What if I were to tell you that you that your experiemce with 'god' is completely subjective to your individual belief system of spirituality?

There are literally thousands of religions and of the many millions of people that believe profoundly that their religion is real amd also have profound experiences woth their "god" or "god's" tells me that there is indeed something further after death or the fact that we are all insame to some degree and induce these feelings within ourselves subconciously. Either way it's interisting but quite irritating in the sense their is no defimite amswer since you can't really prove that your God is in fact real at the end of the day.

Fuck me right?

>>18348045

What is Voices
What is Hypnotism
What is Psychics
What is Black Magic
What is Quantum World

>>18348044
There was a girl I liked, a long time ago. She was into Eminem. I tried to like it, but didn't.

Maybe there's a connection.

>>18348057

You seem to believe in Free Will.

I get status updates that predict what is going to happen in the day, and are always right.

It's almost as though living in a preordained existence was easier for the creator rather than sandboxing these things, life would be a mess without a force behind things that gives order.

RP thread? I'll be a half-elf loli wizard. Put all my points into charisma.
*walks into tavern*
>>18348057
Oh hey, didn't know there was another adventurer in town!
*jumps in your lap*
*notices your bulge*
OwO What's this???

>>18347230
I had a VERY similar experience anon. And yes, I know the guilt and shame youre talking about. Almost made it worse knowing that no matter what God loved me. It made me feel even guiltier about all my mistakes, failures, and sins.

>>18348093
Terrifyingly awesome is the perfect way to describe it

>>18347130
No.

Evil is omnipresent and annoying in this universe. It inhibits efficient function.

>4 c h a n.o r g

>>18348048
It's probably a college student on a synthesizer getting paid $15 / hr by the American super shadow governments to say shit to you on your computer . . .

God created us in his image.

Why is it taking everyone so fucking long to realize this.

>>18348457
Because it would be way too obvious to just look inside of you.

>>18347795
>something global is happening over a particular time period
I subscribe to this theory as well. I posted my experiences in more detail in a goetia thread a day or two ago, but I believe the allegory of the tower of babel or whatever its supposed to represent still hasn't stopped. I've been tracking this for a while now but to me it seems its been happening through the ages and will continue to happen in the future. And its not really the "language" thats being divided, but the fragmentation of perception and minds, the essence of that language is utilized for, that is splitting.

>>18348508
Jst admt ur a Stoopd retard

>>18348508
meme it

you put the meme

inside

of

you

>>18348544
Is it possible to remove a meme from inside you, albeit a long buried one?

>>18348547
>/x/
>transmigrating the genetic information into a cosmically comprehensible and completely free universe
>you bury the meme in the woods

>>18348544
>>18348547
You can awaken it. All you have to do is RISE.

bro, we're all god.

>>18347725
You probably aren't here but...

Could you elaborate?

Are you implying that OP's spiritual experience is misleading him in some way?

If other anons think similar please enlighten me

>>18348832

First time posting in this thread, but maybe he's implying that OP had his first spiritual awakening and had his first contact with an entity. Feeling a response from entities can be a very unique feeling, and connecting it to God can be the simplest answer.

But the entity that OP felt may have just been a malicious spirit who is leading him down a road of misfortune to eventually reap the benefits of negativity.

Personally I believe OP, in that he did feel God's energy. As I had an almost identical experience earlier this year.

I had never been an emotional person, meaning I never made a single decision in my life based on feeling, but one night woke up and I FELT. I felt everything this world was feeling. But I've had years of spiritual experience, and when I was contacted by an energy during this moment, it was the greatest entity I'd ever encountered and tears poured down my face. I've only ever teared up slightly from a strong spirit. The whole experience was filled with positive energy and I had a flashback to when I was a child when I had a dream about the same energy, which led me to trust the entity.

The next day I also had the same feeling of a knot in my heart, as if I was heartbroken. Since that moment my life has only improved and I don't see any way that my life could crumble before my eyes, even if it wasn't God I met that night.

Trust your instinct, and no one else should be able to sway that with a few words on the internet.

I don't know if this was what you were looking for, but I hope this helps at least a little.

>>18348878
Oh and for the sake of additional data, one anon mentioned that they had a Jewish mother.

My parents are also Jewish, and I am of the Cohen. Never religious, and agnostic until I was 19. I'm 24 now.

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>>18348890
>additional data
>implying any of this dogmatic drivel you fill your mind with is real

>>18348878
Thank you

> I've had years of spiritual experience

What do you mean exactly by this? Meditation?

>>18346466
> I cried. I cried for the something I had always been missing my entire life. I cried, for longer than I can remember, I cried.
Go back to /lgbt/ faggot

>>18347070
>>18347045
>>18346495
>>18346466
We are not alone. Together we are all god. I've been through this as well....

>>18347151
>>18348628
yep (double post)

tl;dr please?

That's a first

>>18351733
I am actually God.

>>18351733
And ALL, or something.

>>18347149
you're so closeminded. you're not thinking of it with any sense of breaking linearity. look harder

>>18347217
this sounds terrible and no part of my understanding about God or communion with God contains this. posts like this ruin the thread. remember this for your next LARPing

>>18351734
If you are God prove it.

>>18351765
what do you want me to do

>>18351770
get trip 7s

>>18351773
I'll try I guess

>>18351776
Maybe that's part of the Chaos thing

>>18351777
I'm a believer.

I'm sad right now, but happy for you OP. I'm sad because I'm so lost, afraid, and simply existing. I've been thinking about killing my self for a while, but not really as I feel obligated to stay here to be there for others. A stabbing sensation in my heart, neck, back, or head completely severed from my body. When I close my eyes I see luminated eyes staring back at me. I want to die because... every day is suffering to be alive. We lie, cheat, kill, hate, steal, vanity, laziness, greed, envy, and fight. There's no pure love, love for life, for nature, for animals, for others. Everyone is so blind, selfish, judgmental, ignorant, and negative. I KNOW god exists and I HATE him. I hate how he sent his Son to die for our sins, and no one is grateful. Not for the air they breathe, the animals that die so they may eat, their own body as they harm it with wasteful products like cigarettes and the likes. I HATE GOD, because even now I am always the one willing to go the extra mile for anyone, even tho they mock me, insult me, hurt me, that I'm always the one forgiving because deep down I want to believe there's good. I HATE god, because no matter how much trash I pick the very next day there's more in the SAME SPOTS. I HATE god, because people are killed, hurt, sick, lost, afraid, and abused, and there's nothing I can do to help. Children raped, animals in cramped, dark areas, starved and lined up to be grounded so you can eat that Big Mac. The waters are polluted. Land stolen from animals so that we can make more useless buildings.

>>18353268
From birth I wasn't happy. I watched as everyone and I sin. Those with power to make this world better are the ones doing the most damage. We live in a lie. We think that money, fame, sex, clothes, status, education, materialism, will bring us happiness but they're slowly killing us. We're indoctrinated in school to think a certain way, then you get a job and work a job you don't like to make money for things you don't need, get married and have kids, but never question yourself or reality cause if you're "awoken" to the truth, you'll see how mindless everyone is. How people think the same because they've been conditioned to. That all wars and attacks are lies, perpetuated to keep you scared and fearful so you never leave your home, and watch mindless entertainment like movies, social media, tv, where everyone is upset and oppressed, and the rich and powerful get away enslaving us, performing pure evil, and mocking the awoken ones because society is taught to stay obedient and think we're the insane ones, when from DAY 1 on this planet you were set up to lose unless you sell your soul to the DEVIL. I KNOW GOD is REAL, God is everything that will ever happen, happened, has happened, ALL around us, us, and everything else and from my very core I HATE God with as much Love he has for all his creations. I KNOW God's judgment is sound in that everything is as it should be, but my love has grown into a full blown anger.

>>18353269
I am a living testament that my HATRED is so vial that the Devil him self questions if he truly is the prince of light, as I live everyday willing to spread so much love that when I die I WILL END GOD, THE DEVIL, AND EXPERIENCE/EXISTENCE ITSELF SO NO LONGER WILL ANYTHING EVER SUFFER. I await the days till I cast this mortal reality, and in JESUS'S NAME, I will avenge the suffering of every being FORSAKEN BY GOD. Condemn me to my birth right for a sinners rightful place is in the fiery wrath of Hell, for I fear you, but I don't not serve a God willing to let all that this is be. My Love and Anger are two of the same, so I dare look at my creator, and say you are no God. I will become GOD or burn trying.

>>18353271
>>18353269
>>18353268
If it makes you feel any better, I get this feeling that we all become God.

At the start, on the 14th, after the kundalini thing, I went into a hyper-aware trance. I never lost focus on the physical reality, but I met various aspects and themes of conscious beings.

The VERY first dude, the guy at the start of all this, had no idea what the fuck was going on. He just seemed very happy, in a hysterical and laughing sort of way. He had a lot of confidence, just happy to be here. It felt like he had let go and just existed, and through existence he found joy.

Joy was all I, as a human, was looking for too. I wish you find Joy somehow, and if you can't find it, maybe I can create it.

I think we chose this to experience creation.

>>18353305
Law of One, brother. We are all God.

nigga, just admit it, that was some awesome shroom you had, ain't it?

>>18353913
Little bit of weed, actually. Whether it was the pot or not, I appear to have the ability to influence reality.

Which means that was some pretty high grade marijuana.

>>18353965
Can you channel the energy within you or around?
Can you create?
Can you access universal knowledge?
Can you perform miracles?

If not then I happy you've come truth of God, faith, and love, but I'll tell you this, that I too underwent a very negative awakening and in the process I'm still learning more about reality, and while feeling that positive energy is amazing at first you'll soon find yourself back to where you used to be because while you may have changed internally, reality still is as it always will, and that there is still evil. Ignorance is bliss. Ignore it if you have the heart. Teach others about god or love if you will, but the Devil still exist.
Accepting yourself is the first step, accepting nothing matters is truth, but as long as people suffer I cannot calm my heart.

>>18346466
>>18346467
>Opened my Kundalini
>I guess i'm God
I do not know how genuine your expereience was but if it is true you are being deceived by a demonic spirit.
Did you repent of your sins when you met this entity? Did you aknowledge that Christ is God who came in the flesh and is the only way for salvation? If you did not aknowledge and experienced repentence then it is clear that you've been deceived.

>>18353981
Living in an abyss changes you. Absent from life, you begin to appreciate what "living" really is.

What good is magick in a realm of pure thought and emotion?

>>18353985
How would you repent your sins; is it ok to use English? Or is it something you do in your mind?

>>18353985
I forgave myself.

I think the words I used during the first encounter were something along the lines of:

"I feel like I betrayed something whole and good in life, and was forced to live in something absent from time, control, and love."

Maybe I was Lucifer. Or some Elder God thing. I scared the fuck out of people with that one.

>>18353991
It doesn't matter what language you use. Just turn to Jesus, aknowledge your sins and turn away from them

>>18353997
Friend. You can't forgive yourself. You have no power in that. Only Jesus can forgive sins

https://youtu.be/N9FoEXbqHOk

>>18354005
>Only Jesus

Now you're getting the picture.

>>18354006
So you are saying you are Jesus?

>>18346466
dude i was a my buddy's farm house it was just starting to get dark and there was a pitch black shadow man on all 4s in the road me and two friends walk closer the growled at us so we went inside i grabbed a gun my buddy grabbed a fucken clay more it was still there sot at it did not phase the thing so i opened a beer and watched as my buddy stared running at the thing with a clay more it got up and bolted acrosed the feald on two legs his dogs could not keep up with it and were were all sober at the time.tell me wtf that was pls.

>>18354021
ALL would be more appropriate.

Like an arrow of everything that was, shot into a human body, then exploding out of it, into new infinite possibilities. I have a drawing of it somewhere that better describes it, maybe I'll scan it and upload it sometime.

>>18354027
When was this? If it was anytime between the 14th and the 20th, yeah it may have been some aspect of terror I was pushing out.

>>18354033
>>18354029
So OP, how exactly did you reach this experience?

Did it come to you? Did you meditate?

>>18354037
>Did you meditate?
I was taught how. Between the 14th and now.

>Did it come to you?
Out of the blue. No prior thought on the subject. Maybe a bit of research here and there to sate my desire for knowledge, that's about it. I'm beginning to think it may have all been training. Where my life has an actual script.

Mostly I was just noticing all the terror and fear in the world, and feeling a sense of loss for all that could have been. Like I was taking it in.

>>18354041
So if I understand, you were like a bridge, and all the terror and evil in life kept on piling on top of you like cars driving by, until you gave way into the river of oneness and love?

>>18354047
Something like that. Like a two-way tree (Horizontal, representing time and flow). Branches extending outwards in both directions, me in the center as the trunk.

>>18353991
It doesn't matter as long as you acknowledge the wrong you've inflicted on others while alive be it conscious or unconsciously. From you heart. From all that you are you forgive yourself for all that is you, and try to be a better person from that point on

>>18353989
>Living in an abyss changes you. Absent from life, you begin to appreciate what "living" really is.
My reality is mine to bear. I live as I am. I could do everything I've ever wanted for I've already understood that fear is what holds people back from living. Fear of death. While that be the case, I'm not living for myself. I'm alive to be there for those in needs. To help guide them. To give strength and courage, wisdom and compassion. Nothing matters so I shape my own reality, and I refuse to let others turn this material realm into hell for their own amusement. If you're GOD now, you have love and understand love is key. what will you do? Will you try to spread said love? Will you let it mature? Will it die out?

>What good is magick in a realm of pure thought and emotion?
As good as thought and emotion.
Jesus and I understand this, that even if we have the power to change, if those that already are blind to reality simply expect those that can to do, then never will there be change. This is a collective job, were everyone is united together.

I ask you this, for as God you'd know that what I speak of is no "magick" but will. To equip those with nothing with everything.

You have much to learn. We all do, but in honest belief I think you're just someone that finally is becoming self-aware of reality and it's spiritual nature. Read a couple things about kundalini and it worked, but understand this, that no one will get the chance to prosper if you don't, and if you're truly god it's as simple as believing you are, but to do nothing and accept that others are suffering and you're to blame, can you handle the responsibility of what it truly means to be GOD?

>>18354055
>what will you do? Will you try to spread said love? Will you let it mature? Will it die out?
Analysis.

>As good as thought and emotion.
These assholes changed gears fairly quick.

http://www.cnn.com/2016/11/21/europe/pope-francis-absolve-abortion/

>>18354005
>Only Jesus can forgive sins
Really? Can't i forgive perceived sins against me performed by other people?

>>18354053
Your experience reminds me of my own

I won't go into it, but it was a dream that felt like it lasted a million aeons, I went to hell and felt overwhelmed by evil and terror, until I bursted out and saw the onlyness, the ALL, the source, and I have been changed ever since.

I hope you keep going on your journey OP, and so do I hope the same myself.

>>18354072
>I hope you keep going on your journey OP, and so do I hope the same myself.

I really do hope we all find a little joy in life. There's a pendulum swing, of balance. And if one side builds up too much, it comes swinging back it its face, hard. I think that's where we're at now.

>>18354066
:| I don't think you're GOD. You're not answering most of my questions and the answers you do give... Anon... how Old are you?

>>18354086
>how Old are you?
27

Ask something specific, not filling your 'questions' with assumptions of how things aught to be.

>>18354091
Define what specific means to you.
In any case, I ask this. As God, all knowing or not. What does it mean to be God? What exactly do YOU know?

>>18354108
If you read the thread, you'll come to understand what I have understood. That we've been astray for too long, and it's time for judgement. I don't know why I was selected as some sort of psychic judge, but that's all I know. It seems like my emotions, my ego, my will and all of what makes "me" independent from the "ALL", has become a filter for a vision of the future, at least for the planet Earth.

When I was "dying" and interacting with all those primordial beings, I kept having these shutters of "I don't know" reverberating through myself, and I could feel it reverberating through them, and possibly, through time. Maybe I forced myself into a lack of knowledge, maybe I was a demon in a pit of nothing for eternity that just got out. Maybe I'm just a stupid kid.

All I can tell you is that I'm doing something, and it's changing the way we're going to be living here, in the NOW.

Apply the term "new" to everything you assume, from now on.

>>18354117
I've read the thread. It just sounds like some kid smoked fire weed, came to revelations of a form of truth, and believes he's GOD. Who am I to judge. But I can for certain you're under the age of 21

>>18354125
>But I can for certain you're under the age of 21
I've told you my age.

If you're looking to apply your own logic in an attempt to understand an infinite universe, man, I can't help you. Good luck to you.

>>18354130
>>18354117
OP, can you make me spiritually enlightened, like you are?

>>18354138
I don't know.

>>18354125
You are a bit arrogant and stubborn, aren't you?

Wandering seems big. Like I'm on a path towards knowledge.

I swear, it's like I wrote a script for myself in the infinities of time and space, and plan to walk the entire way to the end.

Jesus that terrifies the fuck out of me. Where do I even begin?

>>18354130
>"Maybe I'm just a stupid kid."
This it what I'm applying to. Simply trying to deduce understanding. 17. I mean you claim to be GOD, ok, well to not expect I or RATHER billions of people on this planet not to want answers isnt hard not to comprehend. People before have claimed to be GOD, you have people, real living people other than yourself on this planet, that dedicated their LIVES to this. I rather test the waters and see if you're authentic then have some kid go out the streets telling everyone he's GOD, and either get locked up or killed. People will want answers and if you're not prepared then more likely you'll find yourself tangled in realities web for only wanting to spread peace and love

>>18354153
OP, I know someone else that is going through similar things. I know a bit what you are going through. If you have a skype and you want to have group of similar people just tell me. If you do not want to share it in public send me an email at:
[email protected]

It is disposable, don't worry

>>18354154
>have some kid go out the streets telling everyone he's GOD

Oh man, I'd never do that. Lol, that's retarded. We're too consumed by expectation for that strategy to ever work.

Like I said. It seems like I'm a judge. Cautious, planning, analyzing, logical, reasoning... judge.

I'm just trying to describe my experiences, man. If I'm hurting you by all this, you can always do something else. Just enjoy your day.

Psychotic break caused by extreme anxiety and depression. That anxiety is still there, only with an inverted mood; euphoria is an anxious state.

You are having a manic episode. You have lost reality testing completely and your brain is going haywire. You feel so great because your brain is making its own drugs. You won't listen to this advice until you crash, so just remember: as soon as you realize there's something terribly wrong with your brain, see a psychiatrist immediately.

>>18354164
The Lies really bug me.

Truth.

>>18354164
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=herQr9JcMJ8

>>18354171
There is a lot of information, a lot of words in this reality.

>>18354145
Judge lest ye be judged. On that note those words have no meaning to me.
Especially if you don't elaborate why.
>You are a bit arrogant and stubborn, aren't you?
Are you asking me or making a statement?
Sorry if I don't instantly accept everything everyone has ever said ever. I'm a fairly open minded individual OP, and more than likely I have my rights, justification, and reasoning for thinking and being who I am.

I'd fair to argue that you're bold to make assumptions, but aren't capable of much of anything with a mentality such as yours holding you back

>>18354177
>I'm a fairly open minded individual OP
You think I'm samefagging?

Dude, low.

>>18354177
Nothing I could say would mean anything to you, and that's okay.

>>18354171
You literally just Googled for something and picked the first result that supports your views.

>>18354170
You are a mind crack addict right now. The criterion for truth that your brain now has is how good thoughts make you feel. It searches desperately for the next fix, dwelling on ever more grandiose imaginings. Think of what happens with pathological anxiety: one dwells on illusory fears and worries, ruminating on them over and over, so much that they interfere with life and cause more suffering than what they fear. This was you. What happened is that it became too much and you had a mental breakdown, and now it's inverted: you're ruminating on illusory delusions, feeling intense positive emotion from them. It's just as life-destroying as your ability to determine reality from fiction is compromised.

Mania never lasts forever, eventually your mind will burn out and undergo withdrawal. Hear me now, and remember when you regain consciousness: seek help as soon as you realize your shit's fucked.

>>18347085
>synchronicty for me seeing this

The Antichamber is GOD lol

beautiful game

>>18354181
You're thinking negative. I'm stating I'm open minded towards your beliefs and others. I just think that someone claiming GOD would be more like the GOD depicted. I mean people have died for this stuff.

>>18354183
It disappoints me more how you easily make claims, but don't fight for what you believe. It's almost as if you're comments weren't necessary

>>18354201
They are not, but I will continue to say them.

>>18354202
Well good on you for doing something important like such rather than wasting time doing things that mattered

OP do as I do. I test you cause I too share similar parallels with understanding. A lot have so don't feel alone.
>>18354191
Maybe right, maybe we're all crazy, but understand that the way you think and feel drive who you are. Actually analyze some of the things I've questioned. Don't let the energy you have inside die. You have to believe in something to make a change. This world is scary. Something's I read I instantly can tell are lies you're telling yourself. It's ok. Sometimes we need to, but I leave with this, You're on the right path. Just study and pray, and become aware of the negativity and sins of self and just try to better you. Even after all this I still love GOD. Don't let others put you down. Don't let negativity rule you. Try to walk a path that you're happy with. Let go~ Love you OP, and apologizes cause I do this to make others feel a type of way, but now reflect on ALL and walk the path to happiness

yeah buddy

>>18354236

>make a change

For what? Alan Watts talked about this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4jBd4fArfQ
It doesn't matter. Stop trying to change things. Watch and see what happens.

File: Screenshot_20161121-212909.png (178KB, 600x1024px) Image search: [Google]

178KB, 600x1024px

Look guys this exact same thing happened to me and this happened. U don't need to believe it. And I'm athiest. I prefer to be my own deity!!! I dont want to praise god but I appreciate god. I realise I am god . help

>>18355602
>I realise I am god
You're delusional.
>help
Ask Jesus.