/x/ please tell me what happened. >be pizza delivery man

Comeon /x/ help me out here, do I take the call or not?

>>18323135
Seems shady to me anon

>>18323135
The line between schizo and wizard is blurred. Ask her for a tarot card reading and then compare her to some from the /div/ threads. Should become obvious then.

>>18323185
what do you have to lose

>>18323200
>>18323205
>>18323213
I don't frequent the /div/ threads but I could, and I'm afraid she's actually a loon in disguise or wants to scam or rob me or something

>>18323200
There was also a man in the hotel room that I never saw, kept telling the little girl to give him food

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>>18323135
I'll float you a possibility; by "spirits" she means sponsors, and by "watching over" she means tape records her room at night.

There. Now if you don't believe in any of that woo woo magical ponies nonsense, you can rationalize anything that happens from this point forward, by assuming there was a technological explanation all along.

Sounds like she's really well connected. It would be foolish not to take her up on the offer. Maybe she just wants to bone you, while her rich husband is away on "" business .""

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>>18323293
By the way, I should add she's almost certainly connected to the " business " and if I have to further explain what business the " business " is in, then you haven't been paying attention, know what I'm saying? She wants to introduce you into the bees knees, know what I'm sayin'? *wink wink nudge nudge she sells drugs hint hint*

>>18323293
But why would she want to bone me? I'm pretty subpar on the looks department, and I think the person she had her daughter bring food too was her husband, my assumption anyway. The whole secrecy and sponsors thing just makes me even more uncomfortable

>>18323302
The business? Selling drugs? Selling drugs sounds kinda lame

Warning: I'm paranoid af and always assume the worst in people.

She wants you to make a website where she can host her illegal porn she plans to make with the other 2. She may want you to get involved in other ways too.

Take the call and go along with things. If you find out what's really going on and you are a stand up guy, then go to the cops with what you find out. If you are not a stand up guy, then continue going along with it, then share the details on /b/

>>18323335
What do you think will happen if I ignore the call? Angry voice mail? Nothing at all?

>>18323339
probably nothing at all, except that you'll spend the rest of your life wondering exactly what that was all about. You'll wish you'd have answered, if just to satisfy your own curiosity.

Hell, maybe I'm wrong about it being something shady. at least, those levels of shady. Maybe she's a fraud, like most psychics, and is out to scam people through a website clairvoyance service. There's a lot of suckers willing to part with their cash. Why not see if you can get in a position to be one of the people to receive that unwanted money?

Answer the call. You know you want to.

Update if anyone is watching, I have received no call and it's 4:13

Answer it if it comes, anon.

>>18323575
I will, but I don't know how much longer I can stay awake

This sounds like a great way to get killed or worse

>>18323213

wise man

This thread lit who here? If OP here I can help mance his ass to victory in this adventure

OP I got you dawg where you at

Fine, we control reality by writing stories.

The people want to have sex with you OP. Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh... yeah. It's something interesting and weird.

I say, go deep. Discover what their deal is. What is their meme? Tell us. We summon you OP

>>18323611
>>18323613
OP here, still no call, unless I get a call at 4 tomorrow I guess she changed her mind

>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexandra_Tydings
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexandra_Tydings
LUZZATTO (Luzzato)

>>18323135
She sounds interesting. This could be a nice experience for you. Or a shitty uncomfortable one. But what is life without risk? The choice is yours ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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You already know what must be done.

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>fufill your destiny!!!?!

>>18323135
She thinks she's a witch and she's bored. Wants to take advantage of younger man and pretend she's magical or some shit. Even if she is a 9th generation whatever she's still deluded

>>18323339
Angry voicemails and make-believe curses, just create the website if she calls, and if it really is about porn, then ask if you can join in on the fun, lose your virginity, and potentially make a lot of money.

>>18323135
So many things I can think wrong about the story.

1. Why would a woman answer the door in a bath robe & invite a pizza guy when she has a kid in the house?

2. Why didn't OP get her laid (the woman, not the kid)?

3. Why didn't he just do his damned job & get out, instead of accepting invitations from strangers that he wasn't going to bang anyways?

4. If he was hired to make a website, why not just make the damned website & take the damned money?

>>18323218
It's almost like you have common sense.

>>18323135
Is this the first time someone you just met has said a bunch of crazy bullshit to you? I used to live in a major city and strike up conversations with strangers. It would happen to me almost on a daily basis, especially with cab drivers. I would get someone's card and told to call them for some crazy project about once a month on average.

At first I thought you were a dumbass for even considering it, but looking back, I kind of regreat not following up on one or two of those, my life was interesting enough though. [By interesting I mean a chaotic mess.]

Some people are always working other people from some angle, the networking types. The most mundane and likely explanation is that you just met one of those.

Might as well take the call if it happens, unless your the type who can't say no to people.

>>18324950
>2. Why didn't OP get her laid (the woman, not the kid)?
Agreed, she wanted to get pounded.

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>>18323135
You've met a member of the Hilary, podesta pedophile club.

>>18323205
>implying /div/ threads arent just roleplaying faggots
lmao

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>>18325244
Shadilay. Guess you gotta do it OP. Report back tomorrow.

>>18324996
Agreed. Once while visiting a different city I was approached by a woman who started out by telling me she was a country artist, and when I was expecting her to try and sell me a copy of her album, she actually started going off the deep end about how Toby Keith had her enslaved at his mansion for 7 years in Oklahoma City and had stolen many of her hit songs. She handed me a bunch of word salad homemade flyers and asked me to spread the word to help the others escape.

Some people are just nuts, OP.

>>18324950
OP here

1) it was a hotel room, and it happens alot more than you would think>>18324950

2) because I don't want to lose my virginity to a stranger in a hotel

3)she invited me in and paid me, not like she gave me a tour of the room and it was the last delivery of the night so I had nothing to worry about

4)that's why I'm waiting on the call, I don't think it's coming though

>>18324996
Yeah I live in a pretty small suburb, nothing really goes on here

>>18324123
What am I looking at here?

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>>18323205
>/div/ threads

OP, the biggest problem isn't the weird surroundings. It's that website clients can do things like not pay, demand a million revisions, and otherwise be complete PITAs. So, with that in mind, if she ever calls:

Make a good contract, with a hard limit on revisions, make her sign that sucker, and CHARGE IN ADVANCE. If you do all of these, you should be golden.

>>18324950
I've delivered pizzas and have been invited into a surprising number of houses, with and without kids, and both with and without potential for serious trouble.

It was a fun gig. Just enough quirkiness to keep things interesting; not enough to send me screaming away.

>>18323135
dude this sounds really fuckin hot.

>>18325537
yeah, seriously, hes got a psycho milf and a loli baiting him and he's like "HEY GUISE AM I A CREEPYPASTA". cut the shit and go fuck that lady you weirdo.

>>18325508
Any experiences to share fellow pizza bro?

To me this mostly sounds like they would fuck you up and steal your kidneys or something.

They were just covering all the grounds. They call a pizza delivery guy, someone who might be interested in doing something else for money, especially if it's more in lines of their own interests. They did ask you what you were good at, and gave you an offer in that specific area. The minimal clothing was for simply for sex appeal, men are more likely to take up the opportunity, especially if sexual favors are even lightly implied. The child may have been there just to make the situation feel more natural, nobody expects anything shady from a family with children. The psychic thing was probably just a cover story.

Now, for further questions. How many pizzas did they order? If it was less than the amount of people living there, I'd be more inclined to think this was a set up.
How was the hotel room? Were there signs of this having happened before, like other company's pizza boxes or other delivery food packages? Did the place seem like they had actually lived there, or did it seem like they just rented it? In your small talk, did they ever ask anything suspicious about you? like do you have a girlfriend (who would notice if you'd go missing), or if you live alone?

Asking anyone to work at 4:00 am is certainly weird, even if this whole story wasn't suspicious already. Nobody just does that. Could be that they want to "snag" you at night so it would seem you just didn't come to work next day, and would have been gone for a while before anyone even notices.

>>18324123
>Occupation: Actress, Yoga instructor, Illuminati Bloodline

>>18323135
>>wearing nothing but a bath robe
>>invites me in
>>usually say no, but decide fuck it and go in.
>You didn't fuck her
nigguh

>>18325757
this
OP they have a plan to rob you of something whether it's your time, your money, or your life. You'd be stupid to go into this. That said, I'd probably do it for one last thrill, but I'm not exactly satisfied with life. If you are happy with your circumstance don't be greedy and chase after something that is most likely a trap

Do pizza boys ever fuck women in bath robes in their own home?

>>18328513
They do in my japanese cartoons and vintage porn movies

>>18325341
I've worked at three different pizza places as a drive-boy and each one had company policies about NEVER going to a hotel room to deliver, always have them come to the front desk. Sorry to burst your rp, sweetie, just couldn't help myself. Unless, of course, whatever state you're working in hasn't heard of robbery or murder lmao

>>18328594
Cool same here. Thank you for sharing but it's not like they have body cams on us

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Don't know if anyone is still interested but here's an update: just got a call from a random number but I was busy and missed it, I tried to call back and it was some bullshit automated message about winning a cruise or something. Did some basic white list searching and it says the call was from from this place. Tried to call back again and nothing but busy signals, this normal for some telemarketing BS?

>>18328594
My wife worked at two different pizza places and they didn't give a shit, nor would any hotels in my town let you loiter at the front desk.

>>18330762
seems pretty normal

>>18330813
Alright threads too old too delete so let's let it die

>>18325500
But he actually predicted the future though.

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>>18323135
I'll tell you what's going on, you're gonna dick a 30 year old autistic milf.

>>18328567
amen

>>18325679
Only a couple are along the lines of what /x/ likes. Here's the wackiest I got:

>My pizza place didn't have those signs for the top of the cars due to stingy owner. But we did have marked everything else.
>This has never been a problem, until...
>I get to this lady's house
>Demands to know where my car sign is
>Explain
>She accuses me of being a fake pizza person
>"Real" pizza delivery ppl "always" have signs!
Oboy
>Point out my shirt and the fact that I have a pizza
>Says anyone can print a shirt and won't believe my insulated bag has a pizza in it
>I point out that I wouldn't know she ordered if I was some random
>Says her call must have been intercepted!
Oboy
>Accuses me of working with her supposedly-psycho ex
>I say, she can call and verify
>Refuses, says that number must be fake too- it's all part of some big gaslighting ring in her mind
>I open the bag, showing pro-printed, logoed, pizza box
>No luck
>Finally show her the damn pizza itself!
>She takes the thing
Whew

>>18332091
Then there were the offbeat stops.
>Get order for 3 or 4 pizzas
>Go to house
>It's a party
>Door opens, there's so much pot smoke in there I can't see in past a couple of feet!
>Someone tries to collect the pizzas
>I hang onto 'em, demand money first
>Seems everybody thought of ordering, but nobody thought of the fact that pizza ain't free
>Stand there 10 minutes while they take up a collection
>They manage to come up with it! About $45 since multiple pizzas
>I get back to the shop
>I REEK of pot smoke
>Manager demands explanation
>I give it
>He checks my eyes for sobriety before letting me back on the road
>Was slightly buzzed through the next couple of stops

>>18332121
>Regular customer calls
>Makes a big deal of saying to turn LEFT at the fist intersection in her sub
>Experience tells me that customers get their directions backwards all the time
>Get in there, intentionally turn right at the "LEFT" spot
>Arrive at her house almost immediately
>She congratulates me for actually listening to her, says I got there fastest of all
>Get big tip
>Stifle laughter as I accept
>She calls again, gets other driver
>I tell that guy that it's a right
>He listens to her instead
>Comes back 1/2 hour later than it should take
>"It was a right! I thought you were fucking with me!"

Dick her down my boi

She's bipolar and having a manic episode.

>>18332132
Next. One for the Gall File!
>Get to house
>She invites me in. Her 2 kids are at the table with plates, and there's a plate for her, too
>She asks me to get the pizza out of the insulated bag and put it on the table
This is fairly normal so far...
>Then she asks me to unbox it
>I open the box but don't remove it...
>Without noticing that I didn't remove it, she asks me to serve it up, a piece on each plate!
Hell no! I'm not a waiter!
>Make up some shit about "not being allowed" to do more than deliver
>She buys it, but is pissed

>>18332141
OP's person or my crazy lady?

>>18332151
OP's. I've worked with people with all kinds of psychiatric illnesses of varying acuity. She feels manic from Thebes description.

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>>18323302
Read that in Carls voice.