I was told by a rare demon, "today you will go to 4chan

>>18185172
I call dibs on being the goat

File: G6HOvy-n.jpg (114KB, 901x900px) Image search: [Google]

114KB, 901x900px

>>18185180

It's coming true... If you are the goat, we are one fourth of the way there

>>18185172
> it was a sort of mid 30s black woman who died in a burger king

The company began in 1953 as Insta-Burger King

>>18185199

I mean she was in her mid 30s when she died in burger king

>>18185180

Stay with me goat I need you

I was stationed on stone cold steve austin naval base, and I'll eat you up boy o.

>>18185172
>hit a bag of sage against the wall
well thats not exactly traditional, but hell, I can roll with it.
I think if anything, Im the racoon.

We cant help you unless we know what you need help with, so maybe start there?

>>18185211

Are you one of the remaining animals?

>>18185220

RACOON!!!! Welcome. It's coming true... It's coming true... Well I don't know, she said they will help me. I have a sense it's a sort of... doing something, not like, helping me personally. Like we have to complete a ritual of some sort or something

File: raccoon5.jpg (24KB, 335x335px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 335x335px

I am become coon, raider of trash cans.

>>18185229
Lies he is a fake raccoon. He doesn't have a picture.

File: esotericshitting.jpg (194KB, 966x966px) Image search: [Google]

194KB, 966x966px

It is time
It is now
Put up your hand and channel the cosmos
Receive the esoteric secrets of defecation.

>>18185236

That's a fair point.

>>18185220 you are now the squirrel

File: squirrel.jpg (369KB, 800x533px) Image search: [Google]

369KB, 800x533px

>>18185236
yeah my mistake, you're probably right as Im the one going on a search for OPs needs, thats more in line with a squirrel.

so what kind of ritual are we doing here?

You don't need the toilet. The toilet is an illusion. The whole world is your toilet. Realize this is true! Right now squat in the middle of your room and channel the mystical energies into your colon. Do not hold back, do not hesitate, shit directly into your pants and receive enlightenment!

>>18185246
>>18185243
well I think that confirms it since i posted that before I even read your response.

>>18185246

OP here, oh my god, it's coming true. Welcome, gentle tree-dweller.

>>18185252

OP here, oh my god

>>18185252

I don't know, but I think we'll find out once Barn Cat gets here

The gateway to the soul must be gape open to allow the universe to penetrate it. Down on your hands and knees, pants down, arch your back and reach to your anus with both hands. Spread it wide, expose your depths to the light of creation. Wink to it! Wink your spread pucker to the universe.

This is what it means to be one. One hole, one universe.

File: barncat.jpg (68KB, 900x599px) Image search: [Google]

68KB, 900x599px

Wait... perhaps I, OP, am the barn cat

brb, I am going to contact the spirit for our next move

I have received the answer.

Squirrel, you bury nuts in the winter and therefore, your livelihood depends on remembering where you have buried your nuts. You are supposed to remember something

Goat, you are good at climbing down mountains. Therefore, you are supposed to give a piece of guidance

Racoon, you are clever, as represented by your tiny little hands. You are capable of using tools. Therefore, you are supposed to "invent a method"

I, barn cat, live inside a barn created by humans. I, therefore, will build these three ingredients into a "barn" which will comprise the ritual

When I have all three ingredients I will understand what the ritual is and I will perform the ritual in my home and post a pic if possible. Then this will lead to great benefit to all of us and the awakening of our animal spirits

File: Technicolor-Cat1.jpg (192KB, 1000x1255px) Image search: [Google]

192KB, 1000x1255px

What is becoming the barn cat really? I mean a barn cat just kills pests that are living nearby before they become a problem, but if you never see the pests then did they exist? If that's the case then is the cat really doing anything for you if you never see a rat infestation, nobody catches the bubonic plague, or mice never destroy your food stores?

>>18185308

OP here, you are the barn cat, not me. Hail! You are called to perform the ritual

hail barn cat

>>18185308

Thank you for this dharmic lesson o barn cat

>>18185308
squirrel here,
greetings barn cat, dont eat me.

Im not sure what it is Im supposed to remember, I remember and forget a lot of things.

Maybe if I hear from one of the other animals itll jog my memory. Should I just free associate here?

OP here, barn cat is now in charge. Bless us barn cat

Barn cat, I am greatly benefitted by your wise teachings. Please stay with us and teach us o guru

File: chesshire cat.jpg (521KB, 1000x836px) Image search: [Google]

521KB, 1000x836px

You're missing the point. If I am barn cat, then I'm not supposed to be DOING anything that you can see. Or rather I am, but you don't ever see it. So if you need a ritual done I'm not the one to do the part of it that you need to deal with. I'm just off hunting mice... and songbirds.

>>18185340

No wait barn cat, you have caused me to see the light. There is no ritual. It is your presence alone. Please remain with squirrel and I and teach us your great wisdom

>>18185325
>>18185329
>>18185308
squirrel again, I guess following from barn cats wise words, my question is, what does it even mean to remember? If I forget something, and dont remember it, how would I know Id forgotten it? If I remember, did I ever actually forget in the first place? Is the storage of all my nuts up there somewhere? What does it mean to remember? If I know where enough nuts are to feed me, isnt that what matters? If I need to eat 20 nuts over the winter, as long as I unbury 20 nuts, the existence of any other nuts, whether I ever knew about them or not doesnt seem to matter...

Maybe Im here to remind you, or cat, that memory is a very loose concept compared to results? Dont try to remember what you're missing because youll never know whether you had it in the first place, try to remember what youve got because that's what is still yours? Maybe all the other memories belong to other squirrels who didnt bury enough nuts in the first place?

File: Godentity.jpg (66KB, 768x576px) Image search: [Google]

66KB, 768x576px

when you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all

>goat checking in

>>18185308
>>18185340
>>18185345
>>18185352

Okay, what the fuck. OP here, you guys are blowing my mind. not sure whats going on

You guys are really helping me untie some knots in my mind, so thank you

File: 1447894242618.jpg (96KB, 960x819px) Image search: [Google]

96KB, 960x819px

If this is some kind of zen thing then, I guess I may as well offer some sort of parable.

One Spring day a farmer is sitting down to breakfast when his wife screams in horror. He comes out onto the porch to see what is wrong, and finds her standing over a beautiful singing bird's dead body. To the farmer and his wife this is a horrible thing, because the singing of the birds gives them great pleasure while they work hard. They find the cat sitting guiltily by the barn with feathers hanging from him. Deciding that they are better off with song birds than this useless cat, the farmer puts him in a potato sack and takes him to the bridge to be rid of him.

Come Winter though the farmer and his wife pay. Mice take the contents of their larder, and rats bring sickness to their children. Without the casual and callous murder of things smaller than itself that the cat brings, the farmer and his wife are worse off.

Sometimes things that work to prevent bad things seem like inconveniences or negative things while they are working as intended, and you never think on them until they are gone.

So, you know. You should totally let me get away with brutalizing "songbirds".

>>18185362
squirrel here, you called for spiritual guidance, you were told what would happen, now it's happening, enjoy the ride.

>>18185382
O barn cat, I have understood. I will allow it to happen.

>>18185391
Love you squirrel.

Also thanks goat, your advice is relevant to a different aspect of my life

I also appreciate raccoon's contribution, definitely has a zen quality to it

>>18185400
squirrel again, remembered something:

Nuts and beans in almost every magical tradition on earth are universally seen as symbols of fertility, prosperity, luck and rebirth in various sympathetic magical uses.

Maybe Im trying to say that just because theres 20000 nuts buried out there somewhere... some of them which I buried, some of them which other squirrels buried, remembering them isn't the point, digging them back up is the point, and once Ive got enough, thats all I need.

So no point hoarding, find enough nuts and remembering ceases to be important. In other words, stop trying to remember what you may or may not even know since like, you buried that nut a long ass time ago, and make the most of the opportunities, lucky breaks, and rebirths that you do find. You cant eat all those nuts anyway, better that you dont know where they are, whether you ever knew in the first place or not.

OP here, everyone come read back over this legendary thread. Behold the four glorious animals

>>18185413

The nuts are my desires oh squirrel.

>>18185413
also, dont go looking for nuts in stupid places, like under barn cats bed. You know YOU didnt bury one there because thats stupid, you know none of the other squirrels buried one there because they are also not stupid... look for opportunities where you know theyll be (because you would have buried one there, and maybe you did)

>>18185420
oh then this post makes even more sense:
>>18185423
Dont go looking for your desires in stupid places, you know where they'll be whether you put them there or not.

>>18185423

Oh squirrel, I will take the straight path. I will not look for nuts in dangerous places. I will not project false memories in a way that causes self-harm.

>>18185424

>know where they'll be whether you put them there or not

Oh squirrel so divine

Barn cat clipped ear dc

Hilarious :P So much information in such a unusual form.

How very interesting.

OP here

Thank you oh squirrel and magical animal spirits. I think I received the understanding I was supposed to get out of this. Funny, it's easy to talk about the concept of acceptance, or understand concepts in general, but sometimes it's impossible to do something unless a... friend or someone... close... tells you to...

Some types of understanding won't come any other way... No matter how good you might be in meditation, contemplation, spirituality, whatever, sometimes maybe you can only get something if someone gives it to you

>>18185172
Some of us will interact with you in certain ways, with their personality personified in animals. whether it will be positive interference, or maybe the demon is fucking with you, is yet to be seen.

>>18185431
>>18185429
>>18185424
squirrel here, perhaps this is relevant to the situation, but Ive got to get up in like six hours so I can go to work and collect some more nuts to stash for winter... I honestly hope Ive been a help in this situation. Tell your 30 year old spirit lady I said hello and thank you for her help.

Put out a glass of water or some food for her as a thank you once all this is completed, she seems to have come through.

By the way if she was wearing an old timey scarf headwrap thing and an apron, and ESPECIALLY if she was carrying a basket, that wasnt just any old black lady, that was La Madama, it might be her either way, seems like her style.... catch you soon OP, may you find all the nuts you need this winter.

>>18185443

Thank you great squirrel, I am fulfilled.

>>18185435
>>18185438

op here, glad you guys enjoyed this. certainly was a cool zen thing for me

File: Mosquito_Tasmania_crop.jpg (574KB, 1719x1296px) Image search: [Google]

574KB, 1719x1296px

I'll be the surprise that gives death and takes only for myself and mine. It is I, mosquito. Though I will die soon I have left my mark on this earth and causing lots of diseases/viruses to spread.

>>18185460

OH FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

File: 1252953453_5ccbcdfd35.jpg (31KB, 325x241px) Image search: [Google]

31KB, 325x241px

>>18185460
And now I die, giving one last hooman the zinka virus.

>>18185172
The racoon is eugenia cooney, from Connecticut. Land of the Flying Dutchman, tangled in Texas.

They say that you can aid this process with diphenhydramine. low doses to induce meditative state if you want. but not necessary.

>>18185443

Making a tea for La Madama squirrel senpai

>>18185199
No one can be this stupid

what in the actual fuck

OP here, I'm back to uh... chill here.

Maybe this could be a future type of thread? Everyone take on animal spirits?

>>18185504

OP here, I bet he was that stupid though

File: tmp_32667-IMG_20161001_0121461473916046.jpg (143KB, 800x453px) Image search: [Google]

143KB, 800x453px

>>18185531
Serpent here,
Sometimes it is best not to devour the Earth, when all you need is a little mouse.

... But, you could just devour the Earth anyways.

Think about it.

Might be fun.

>>18185572

OP here, I like this one. Very flipside to the zen... moshi moshi, o snake-sama.