i can't sleep tonight because i had one of the worst days

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i can't sleep tonight because i had one of the worst days of my life and i need someone who can clear my mind, so i'm gonna tell you my history:
my bf had a kitty who was pregnant, she gave birth and leave us with her 5 lil kittens that was almost two years ago and we raised 2 lil girls -one died a few days after that and the others were adopted by some friends of his family-
we love and respect cats as much as humans, so we were kind of a family even if i didn't live with them i used to visit em and we had a strong love for each other, but over 6 months ago my mother-in-law wasn't happy about me staying in their home so i didn't went to that place anymore
last week i started to dream about one of the girls, it was really weird bc when i woke up i had this strange feeling that it wasn't a dream, the first night she only purred and the next nights, it was more and more intense
she couldn't talk to me, but she was able to communicate herself without words coming out of her mouth
on saturday night (more than sunday morning bc i use to go to bed around 4am and sleep at 9am) she finally told me something i couldn't understand also told me she was so happy and grateful then she stroked my face with her tail and finally i woke up with a strange feeling, i told it to my bf and we didn't matter about it but a few hours after that, her mother called him and told us she was attacked by a dog (they live in the country so there's wild dogs)
he started crying and i was shocked, just telling to myself: i knew it i knew it; finally i ate my pride and went to my bf place, and that was when i realized what was happening, i started to cry till i fall asleep, then we woke up and bury her with some flowers and roses
should i feel pain or sadness? or should i feel happiness because she told me she's gonna to be ok?? what can i do now for her? i feel so confused right now because i used a secular person
nothing is eternal but death, but what is death really?
help pls :(