If vampires were real, and you had an opportunity to become

depends on my level of sentience post change.

No, I wouldn't want to be inable to move around during the day

>>18006351
You'd be immortal though?

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>>18006346
Being a vampire from the preacher comic would be best.

>Deadpool style healing factor so long as you've drank blood recently.

>Never age.

>Nothing but direct sunlight can kill you.

>Have three times the speed and strength of a normal person.

>Have no obvious physical signs of being a vampire besides being extremely pale and having vampire eyes.

>Can get by on animal blood (but human blood is more potent.)

It's a pretty good deal all round, only real downside is being considered an abomination by God and therefore never being allowed into heaven, but gods AWOL in preacher anyway, so who cares?

>>18006346
I'd imagine it would be torment after a while, not even just the immortality stuff, but being cut off from God completely like a shade in hades, devoid of personality and simply attempting to maintain a caricature of what you remember human action was like.

Is the OP img one of the '28 days of night' vamps? Now they were scary, old school, no teen hero shit there. But yes, also animalistic, and definitely the sense of having lost their humanity. Wouldn't want to be one of them.

I'm in my 50's and starting to consider the things I won't be doing with my life. When you're young everything seems possible, if you want to learn Russian or play piano you just do it. I've done some stuff I'm happy with, but the list of not-done things is real. If I could maintain my health and my humanity, the thought of a few hundred years to learn to play like Oscar Peterson, or truly master a martial art, is very tempting.

But there is an esoteric reason for our lifespan. As people age, they crystallise. Our hangups, neuroses, the less desirable parts of our selves, our egos, become entrenched, less fluid, immutable. It takes a great deal of will to maintain a practice of self awareness which accepts that you're not perfect, not 'fixed', not right about everything, and that sometimes you can be a bit of a dick. Death helps wipe the slate to a certain extent, loosens some of those ego ties and gives us another go at working with those issues from an easier, younger perspective when we reincarnate.

So yes, very tempting to spend longer here, but could I do it without becoming a caricature of all the worst aspects of myself? I don't know.

>>18006356
I wonder if I would be paper white if I was to become even paler than I already am
I would be the most easy to spot vampire. Fake tans would be my friends

>>18006355
what if you get a wooden stake in the heart

>>18006378
Fuck, *30* days of night.

>>18006368
>God
lol whats next bigfoot is real too?

>>18006356
Interesting you choose Cassidy because he illustrates what I said above: he became a caricature of his own worst traits, and never had to face up to them (no spoilers- if you haven't read Preacher, do it.)

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>>18006393
I know what you mean, I've read every issue twice, it's my favorite comic.

I think Cassidy's "failings" we're less to do with him being a vampire, and more to do with his own personality. I wouldn't consider it a downside of vampirism, it's just a matter of not letting yourself become numb to the existence of others besides yourself.

Cassidy wasn't a bad person though, he was still a "good guy", even at the end.

>>18006430
Yes I agree entirely, but that's my point; Cassidy's human failings stayed with him and became engrained because of time.

>>18006346
yes definitely

>>18006383
Well you'd try to avoid that wouldn't you?

Fuck yeah I'd be a vampire. As long as it's not the feral kind, more like, just a human that sees/experiences the world in more acute ways and also has a hankering for blooooood

Would a vampire explode if you shoved a piece of garlic up its ass?

>be deficient in vitamin D for life
>only food source is luke warm blood from humans
>STD rates still absurdly high, so your food source is bound to give you a lifelong case of horrid crotch rot
>not to mention neurosyphilis
>so you'd be a barely functional nutjob before long
>incapable of being in direct sunlight which means you're severely limited in when you can move about
>even what places you can live
>life consists of nothing but hiding and trying to feed on prey like some lower uncivilized animal

Vampires are pretty lame and gay tbqh. Humans are apex predators, vampires are faggy parasites.
I could see why a lot of people here would be content living as a glorified leech though. Basically just a more extreme version of welfare.

>>18006541
But I'm ginger, we produce our own vitamin D. Advantage?

Depends on which type of vampires. If it's like Dio from JJBA sure, but if it's like from Twilight, nah.

>>18006346
Za warudo

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>>18006346

So long as I would be able to build up an obedient and eternally youthful harem of former victims, it'd be tempting.

I don't know ;)

>>18006541
Its called a curse for a reason

Dracula will always be the greatest. Plenty of quality alternatives in media is present somewhere.

Some of it is actually horrifying. Like the worst qualities of humanity made exceptional from depravity; what I mean is turning an individual which has a lack of ethics as a mortal and becomes much like some wild animal with a new existence.

>>18006614
Why not the twilight vamps? Yeah it was a teen love story, but they could be in the sun no problem. I dont see the downside

>>18006614
>>18006684

>here's how you get memes
>do you want a meme?

>>18006541
Vampires cant even get hard or have sex

>>18006386
>vampires are 4real but God isn't
Where's the curse coming from then dummy?
Also no "scientific vampirism" wank because that's almost always boring and stupid as hell.

>If they were real
get a load of this shill

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>>18006346
Depends on the type of vamp. If it's the type you see in Skyrim that turn into those vampire lords, then hell yes. Only thing I'd want different would be larger, actually practical wings.

But if it's fucking Twilight, or your pic, then I'd pass.

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>>18006798

>>18006378
See you get it. Anyone living that long would be neurosis upon neurosis, gradually becoming a pathological catastrophe. Can you imagine trying to have a conversation with someone like that? Endless incidental things triggering strong emotional reactions in them over and over and over as their baggage builds and builds...

I think if you're going to really consider immortality you have to have a mental health strategy to go along with it.

Thus all this meditation I've been doing I suppose...

>>18006368
other than the whole cut off from god thing and the immortal thing. how is anything you said different from my normal every day life?
like. srsly. i hate going out into the world on a daily basis. but i have to so that i can get money to pay for the roof over my head and all the digital distractions i enjoy and save up for my old decrepit stage of life when i expect i will be relying on the offspring of one of my brothers to put me in a nursing home and then go thru all my stuff for anything valuable and hawk all the stuff i asked them not to that i had said i wanted to take with me to the delayed reaction funeral home.
i plan on keeping my xbox one and 360 in perfect working order until that time and also gonna have hard copies of the elderscrolls games so that when they send me to the nursing home i can spend the rest of my days living as a fictional guy in a fictional world.

then again by then they will hopefully have figured out hollodeck technology and i can enjoy my simulation of tranquility and whatever the hell it is i please.

of course my fall back plan for that plan is to scare the shit out of kids by asking them "hey kid, you want to see a dead body?" at which point i will crack my neck convincingly and then flop over onto the floor or ground and lay there motionless as the children scream. i will know i have reached total success when my grand neices and nephews start yelling "mom dad, uncle anon is playing dead again!"

>>18006346
is there a cure for just in case i get bored of it? and do i have to start acting like a faggot a- la: vampire diaries, true blood, twilight?

>>18006383
even if you're human you'd die

>>18006541
Vampires in most depictions are immune to bloodborne diseases, have far greater physical abilities than humans let alone supernatural abilities and the eventual advantage of experience from immortality. Many of them, including classic ones like Dracula, are totally able to be in sunlight, usually at the cost of "just" being weaker and closer to a normal human in power.

>humans le epix predaytors XD

The average person that says this is a fucking weak little bitch trying to take some degree of accomplishment in humanity as a whole while not doing anything themselves.

You probably can't even do more than a dozen pull-ups or knife hunt large animals.

>>18007105
low test projecting beta detected
Vampires are gay as fuck. Deal with it.

>>18006356
>And suck dick to feed your crippling addictions

>>18007115
I didn't mean to make you butthurt because I called you out anon, just stating some facts. Your response is almost as hilarious as any of your one rep maxes though.

>>18007125
Even more low test projection

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>>18007127
You can whine and scream PROJECTION PROJECTION PROJECTION ;_; all you want anon, it won't change anything for you.

>>18007136
You are quite literally projecting your own baseless insecurities out onto the internet.

I would in a heartbeat. I want to help preserve history and animal species long term, and I don't think I can do much with my human life.

>>18006346
>if
They are real, son. They're just not what you see in movies.

>>18007327
We're not talking about people who shop at Hot-Topic anon.

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>>18006346
Only if I could be a JoJo vampire since they have none of the weaknesses associated with vampires besides sunlight and you can do all sorts of crazy disgusting shit with your body.
But I'd rather be an Ultimate Lifeform.

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I only see pros in this scenario. You could justify it by being a vigilante vampire who only targets corrupt elites for feeding. Yes it would be sad seeing your friends/family go but you would make new ones along the way. With enough time you would be obscenely rich and you could work nightclubs or bars for social interaction. The one problem I see is international travel and finding a secure lair, unless you get levitation powers as you grow older.

You might even be able to save the world. You could invent new things to benefit humanity to compensate. Immortality is a blessing and a curse I suppose.

Yes I would because I don't want to die.

>>18006351
Become a basement dweller like me. How could you go wrong?

>>18006346
No, because I have no desire to live forever, especially at the expense of others.

>>18008423
I'd rather be a werewolf.

depends on which universe type of vampires.
slavic vampires are just shitty, annoying ghosts(for the most part). No weaknesess, but nothing awesome either.
dracula-like vampires have so many fucked up sets of rules to follow that no sane person would want that.
WoD vampires are... tempting, but it depends on the clan.
Hellsing vampires are either too OP or suck balls.

Honestly, vampires in most mythologies and universes aren't really a good thing to be 'living' as, for the long term.

>>18008940
>Honestly, vampires in most mythologies and universes aren't really a good thing to be 'living' as, for the long term.

Being a weak, aging human isn't that much better.

>>18006798
>Only thing I'd want different would be larger, actually practical wings.
Plus, you know, not being a flying being who still inexplicably takes fall damage.

>>18008423
You might not necessarily have to kill the people you feed on. Some vampire lore even says the feeding is intensely pleasurable for the victim.

I wouldn't mind living forever. The whole "miss your curfew by a second and turn to ash" is a big drawback though. Plus all that other crap that kills you.

>>18009342
>The whole "miss your curfew by a second and turn to ash" is a big drawback though.
Just wear motorcycle gear. It worked for that guy in Blade.

>>18006346
Can I be turned by a beautiful female vampire because she wants to preserve my beauty forever and keep me as her apprentice/lover/pet?

>>18006346
Fuck no! I'm fat, I don't want to be fat for eternity. The fuck?

>>18006346
Damn right I do.

Where do I sign?

>>18009355
Who the fuck could tolerate fat neckbeard for centuries?

>>18009487
I don't know. But since I'm neither, I don't have to worry about it.

how to get vampire gf?

Fuck no I don't want aids u shitty vampire ur not even immortal.

Yes i would rape so many QTs

>>18006346
Would my OCD and depression be cured?

If not, fuck no.

>>18007105
Too be fair I'm big as fuck and can only do 13 pull ups. Who the fuck hunts wild animals with knifes?

>>18009572

>big as fuck
>13 pull ups

laughinggirls.jpg

>>18009569

Don't be a bitch your while life.

>>18009972

Ahh, fuck me sideways. Edit for spelling. Whole**

>>18006384
Thanks for reminding me this exist anon watching now

Heck yeah I would become a vampire. But mainly a basic weak to sunlight vampire, but also still be able to turn into a bat. I would hang out at wal mart all the time and stuff, and I would sneak into the movies at night, record and pirate their movies and put them on the internet for free. I would do tons of cool stuff.

Yup

>>18010335
Most boring. Vampire. Ever.

>>18006801

The unfortunate thing about vampire literature is that they hardly go into the psychological aspects of it or the expansive capabilities gained through their vampirism. I'd submit that the human psyche isn't meant to exist that long, but would having an expanded ability for cognition remove some of the deleterious effects of old age?

For example, lets say through vampirism you could truly multi task with lets say up to 6 full fledged lines of thought all fleshed out and plugging along like a multi-threaded program (yes our minds aren't reduced to such simple metaphors). Could we then cope with the emotional demands of life?

It would also explain why they tend to isolate themselves and live along dilated time scales.Much better to have your drama unfold over centuries than weeks which is what would normally happen in human squabbles.

>>18006346
n.....maybe.

>>18010366
Honestly this, I don't think I can answer that question unless it's actually being seriously offered. Too many factors.

>>18010357
>For example, lets say through vampirism you could truly multi task with lets say up to 6 full fledged lines of thought all fleshed out and plugging along like a multi-threaded program (yes our minds aren't reduced to such simple metaphors). Could we then cope with the emotional demands of life?
You could always just choose not to have that many different things going on at once.

>>18010389

Then I would say a great ability is wasted in that case.

>>18010397
It's basically the same way humans operate. Most people don't believe you have some kind of obligation to do literally everything you're capable of. Your limits in that situation might be less restrictive than they were as a normal human, but they'd still be there.

>>18010354
That's a weird way to spell "most bro vampire ever."

It all depends on which clan would embrace me. Definitely join the glorious Camarilla no matter what tho...

>>18006351
What is sunscreen for 500?

>implying I haven't already

>>18006616
Toki wo tomare

Can vampires get erections? If not just fucking kill me

>>18006356
Cassidy didn't have Vampire eyes, his heroin use destroyed his eyes beyond what his vampire healing factor could repair due to him injecting directly into his eyes.

But I'd totally be a vampire like Cassidy, just retain your humanity and individuality with no blood lust

>>18006430
>>18006465

Cassidy does try to redeem himself too, but I dunno if I would ever consider it canon, I met Ennis at a few different cons and he said that his ending from the Salvation on arc weren't really originally planned and they were drawn out so he could write the new ending cause vertigo didn't let him do what he wanted.

But Cassidy and the other vampire just showed how a normal man becomes a vampire, and what happens when you're a prick and become one.

>>18006351
Move to Alaska, and then stock up for the sunny months. I'm assuming you can still at least hunt animals easily, if you can only use human blood then whatever. Shitpost on 4chan like you usually do. Golden life.

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Like a higher vampire from The Witcher? Then yes.

damn, you guys edgy

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>>18015522

>>18006346
No, because if vampires are real, that means I'm a fucking wizard.

No because vampires are the faggiest of the mythological creatures, aside from fairy men

>>18006386
It's funny to hear people with grammar like yours belittle the beliefs of others. You're obviously less intelligent than the average person, yet you feel so superior to them. You're a fucking joke. I hope that you realize how inferior you truly are.

if you were truly immortal, incapable of dying, then in a sense you would have been freed from the cycle of life and death. it would be eternal life in a place of existence you're already familiar with instead of a spirit plane. you're mindset would determine if it would be heaven or hell.

i'd feel relieved. i'd never have to worry about what's going to happen in the future. i wouldn't worry about life after death anymore.

>>18016112
Most people don't really look at the mythology of vampire but just how gay they appear currently. Vampires from Near Dark, Preacher, those are cool, hell even Dracula was disgusting and smelled of death. I dunno why they go through seductive periods

Potential Deal Breakers
>becoming ugly
>not having a robust community of vampires to socialize with
>not being to go out in the sun

>>18006346
nah, might fuck up the reincarnation cycle

>>18016722
>it would be eternal life in a place of existence you're already familiar with instead of a spirit plane. you're mindset would determine if it would be heaven or hell.
Well, if you believe people who have NDEs, apparently what we call the "afterlife" is actually our real home that we're even more familiar with than Earth. We just forget that while we're here. They also say Hell doesn't even exist.

>>18010357
I think the necroscope books dealt with the psychology of the vampires pretty well. Especially where the old vampires had to be taken care of because of diseases like the plague.

thats like one of my top ten daydream fantasies dude, along with getting super powers, and finding a death note

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>>18006346
Eh... No... I'd be afraid that I wouldn't know what to do. So, going off the common belief on a Vampires powers (Ex. turning others into vampires, flying, invisible in mirrors) I'd be afraid of drinking blood from another person, not because it's immoral, I just don't want to drink too less and make another vampire who may or may not be pissed at me.

>>18006346
This was such a fucking stupid movie.

>>18010357
>>18017732

So a portion of the danger is being a contagion to the people without immunities.

>>18016112
Obviously doesn't know his mythology.

Fucking fairies are horrifying. Vampires are pussies compared to the shit they do. Fae come in every imaginable shape/size/temperament/thirst for blood imaginable. Weaknesses vary by type, though iron seems to be pretty universal. Until you come against one that isn't weak to it.

Tinkerbell and your 'fairy men' are the Twilight of the fae world.

I had this discussion with a friend decades ago. If you retained your sentience/humanity, which would you go for? She was all for the vampires. Personally, I'd prefer the shapeshifter. Some of them are said to be immortal or have an extended lifespan.

Can't get a boner without a pulse, nigga