>something that looks like a prostitute >come in, I can

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Congrats, you must've been the first person to ever speculate about this.

What about Crazy Tracy

Most likely the designers were thinking that she's just tending to your wounds, but they couldn't think of an effective way to depict this so they just have you go in her house so the healthcare occurs offscreen.

>>3879908

>healthcare

I could use some healthcare..

Heheh

>>3879887
>prostitutes helping me restore my life

Not me irl.

>>3880143
Damn it Beavis

>>3880323
The only reason they'd be "helping" you is because it's the only thing they believe they can do.

>>3879887
Anything else you 'discovered' about Zelda 2? That is, if you actually play it instead or just repeating memes ...

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>>3879887
She doesn't charge you anything though.

"Something that looks like a prostitute"? It's a generic NPC sprite, a woman wearing a dress. If you look at an average woman and see a prostitute, that's probably something you should discuss with a therapist.

You just went full maladroit.

>>3879887
The Japanese only novelization of the game explains things much better.
> As Linku entered great town of Ruto his eyes instantly fell upon an inhabitant. Her beauty and grace were rivaled only by Zelda's.
> "Come inside, great warrior, I will heal much of your wounds."
> As Linku entered the house the uzaki [editor note: Japanese term for sex worker] laid link upon the bed and for many hours she spent in his warm embrace.
> Upon the light of new morning link set out for the forest maze, his energy from much days of fighting fully restored.

Zelda II is actually an allegory for the Muslim occupation of Spain in the 15th century, he goes on a one man crusade and slaughters all of their soldiers, executing each caliph personally.

>>3881519
Makes since considering Ganon made the gerudo

>be dying
>get you dick sucked
>wounds healed

Does that even sound remotely plausible to you, OP? Stop being retarded.

>>3881778
Considering ive never been gravely injured I wouldnt know, but I wouldnt rule it out if I was and some hot bitch offered it to me.

So it's totally fine that Link rips the still-beating hearts from the bodies for nightmare monsters and adds their power to his own, it's totally fine that he confines fairies in bottles just so he can later consume their flesh, but fucking a harlot? That's just going too far.

He also fucks the old lady to get magic

And the old man to get spells

And the knights to get downthrust and upthrust

Think about it

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>sword is tempered by "beating"
>tempered sword is red
>Link raises it up high like he's having an erection

>>3881839
>what did they mean by this?

>>3881449
>Implying she's not just some slut
>Implying prostitutes always get paid for sex
>Implying the question is even relevant to OPs point

>>3879887
Haha! Yes! I, too, have seen that AVGN episode! He is totally our guy, amirite?

>>3881839
That sword is clearly orange.

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>>3881839

I like how it looks like the midgets are hammering on a baguette.

>>3881474
>The Japanese only novelization of the game

Has someone done a fan translation of it or do I have to learn japanese to read it and if so, is it worth it?

Just like in my RPG maker doujin games

>>3880624

Could possibly also be because they make a normal monthly salary in a few days if you condense their actual working time. You tard. Hookers are just lazy, hot girls, don't pity them.

>>3884075
context?

>>3882028
That post was facetious.

This shit is beneath even Reddit. You should all be ashamed of yourselves.

>>3879887
O L D M E M E S

>>3884334
Not only that but it's not even funny anymore, this shit joke has existed since the dawn of man.

>>3884323
Nothing really, I just checked the car and that's the only dialogue I get.

>>3884440
you think its sex?

I looked it up its some sort of kidnapping but the screenshot makes it look dirtier

i got one

the lady in nabooru
LOL

she wants water LOL
but it's only 5 feet away LOL

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA EPIC MEEMS

>>3881860
>Implying prostitutes always get paid
They don't, but Link is a hero of justice. He wouldn't eff a whore and not pay her, that's a clear violation of Lawful Good conduct.

>>3881519
Goddammit, MatPat; don't you have anything better to do?

>>3884325
If anything, it was probably so wackadoo indie fan guide, which were popular in Japan back in the 80s.

>>3884316
>hookers are hot
You've never seen a hooker, did you? Hot girls aren't hookers, hookers are generally average looking. Hot girls become models, hookers are women without opportunities.
Also being a prostitute is really emotionally draining and a risky job with high danger of violence (technically more dangerous than e.g. being a cop). So, you know shit fuck.

>>3880143
Wouldn't fucking a random prostitute make you ill, rather than healthier?

>>3885683
You guy's should look up "Comfort women".
After all Link is in war, against the evil.

Is there no documentary or book or anything that's about these kinda old video game myths? If no than there should be one.

>>3879887
and the power ups in mario are drugs xD

>>3886650
Thats why a lot of hookers get a pimp and have disclaimers saying no blacks.

>>3879894
Hot af

>>3879887
>Falling for the meme

Some girl cooking a home cooked meal for her scrub

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what does it mean?

>>3889056

There are a couple of possibilities:
>Bagu and Error were transliterate English words, "bug" and "error" respectively. When they got translated back into English, "Bug" was interpreted as "Bagu," which makes the joke less obvious.

>"Error" is a mistranslation of "Errol" or a similar name. It's probably more likely that the characters were joking named "Bug" and "Error."

>>3888668
And ekans is snake spelled backwards, and arbok is kobra spelled backwards, so omg, muk?

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>something that looks like an old homeless man
>lives in a shithole cave that's on fire
>it's dangerous to go alone! take this
>acquire object that resembles meth/crack pipe
>you take it and become bloodthirsty killing machine
hmmm

I have a theory regarding Earthbound. Everybody knows who Ness is. But what if, you know, Ness actually became a skeleton?

He could be Sans from Undertale (I know Undertale is technically not /vr/ but I wanted to share this crazy theory)

>>3889231
>Undertale
I've never played this game but it seems like the embodiment of everything wrong with retro fetishism

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>>3889236
How can you not love the game that gave us based Undyne?

>>3889236
it's actually a good game.
the problem was that it was one of those games that started swamping /v/, so people started to hate it.
people also (evidently) use it to shitpost

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>>3889231
The context of this gif makes more sense than that theory!

>>3881519
dude hell yeah, no wonder there is the huge Christian graveyard love this game more now that Link is a crusader Deus Vult

A prostitute wouldn't restore your health, she'd take it away.

>>3889468
GTA3 called

>>3889109
Yeah. That's probably how it went down but I prefer >>3889104

>>3879908
>>3879887
Japanese attitudes toward prostitution and sex in general are not really the same as in countries with a strong Christian influence, it's not abnormal to see explicit references to both in kids shows for example.

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Come on, /vr/, you should be right on top of this.

>>3889056
>>3889076
Doesn't Bagu ask SPECIFICALLY for Error at one point, meaning that that was always intended to be his name?

People always try to making it seem like the "I AM ERROR" thing was suppose to be a full error message that has no meaning instead of "This is plot relevant, as I'm one of the few people in this game who gives you their name."

As the years go by, I'm highly convinced that no one who jokes or whines about Zelda II has ever played it.

>>3889336

Sadly >>3889231 ain't a shitpost. That's a prevalent "has to be true" fan-theory put forth by MatPat on the Youtube channel Game Theory.

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>>3890717
Bagu and Error never speak about eachother.
Someone in Mido references Error tho

>>3890728
Point still stands that someone refers to him by name as a plot point.

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"There's a price, barbarian."

>>3879887
Interesting factoid. Here's another:


Did you know that Super Mario Bros. 2 was actually a Famicom Disk system game called Doki Doki Panic? It starred an entirely different cast! The REAL Mario 2 was considered too difficult for western audiences, so they reskinned DDP with Mario sprites!


Uwwwwaaaaaaahhhh! I want mai Mario 2 >. < -Me, 1988!

>>3881474
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2GOPuwAld0

>>3881474
If its japanese then i think his name would be rinku not linku