>http://randompokemon.com >turn off NFE >generate 1

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I guess I just drown

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>>31504412
I'd be a great swimmer and probably eat a lot of fish

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I... I don't know, stay up all night?

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I can't wait to cause havoc and be an asshole with my new dad

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I guess I would be really good at singing and not have stage fright thanks to Melo-Mom.

>>31504624
Nigga you literally hit the jackpot

>Entei
BORK BORK I ERUPT VOLCANOES

>Sunflora
god, why have you forsaken me

>Maractus
>Growing up in a desert
T-thanks mom.

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>>31504412
I was probably molested as a child

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I dunno. Guess I get to hang out near the sea.

>>31505111
Hey man you get that dank purifying water n shit.

>>31504412
What does OP gain? Bag espionage?

>Wishiwashi
Fair enough.

>>31505032
>a lot of running
>being scared of everything
>BORK BORK VOLCANO BORK
>abducting children

>jirachi
Wish for anything I want lmao

>>31505119
I guess that's kinda funny cause my dad actually does that for a living (water purification and filtration)

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Nice

>Wailord

... I'm with >>31504454

>Delibird

It's christmas everyday

Mewtwo-X Mega
I don't know what I do here.

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>Pheromosa
>try to go fast as fuck
>die
>Atleast I get to look fucking fab
Also I want to fuck my new adoptive poke-mom

>>31504412
>kommo-o
time to train

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Learn how to be dom?
Uh, I guess get incredible legs and ass too?

>Simipour
Eat Wuet Monkay diks

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I'd really hate bugs and live in a desert like I already do.

>Unown

This childhood was brought to you by the letter P

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Flygon
>Live in desert
>Learn to live off the land
>Eventually found desert city
This is what I'd look like during and after being raised by my new Poke-dad

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anyone want some juice that me and my dad made?

>>31505472
>pants
>long sleeve shirt
>jacket
>scarf
Don't die now, anon.

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>Get fave bromon
I guess learn how to punch things
-extra hard

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I'd probably learn to stay in the dark, make my own clothes, creep on people from a safe distance, and FUCKING HATE PIKACHU

I got Pyukumuku...well that would be a crappy father :/

>>31505663
so no change?

>>31505689
Don't you want to learn how to vomit out your own organs?

>>31505765
Or sit around and do nothing? I would consider it if I was set up on my couch or something

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>>31505739

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I don't even fucking know. I love nature, but cave-living seriously doesn't sound like a good time to me. Would still be a huge improvement over my real parents, though.

>>31504412
>Clawitzer
I become really good at shotput?

>>31505134
The only thing there I don't already do is run.

>Landorus

I get to rule the meta? Fuck yes.

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>>31504412
According to the dex, I'll be spending my time pretending I can fly and shrieking at dinosaurs

>>31504412
>Mega Diancie
Ummm... I don't know what this would mean. I guess I'm really into cool lookin rocks? Steven is my favorite champion so it all works out in the end

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>Only do things if the sun is strong
>Otherwise, don't do it

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>>31504412
>This is my mom
Well fuck.

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>Celesteela
I grow up in the ultra wormhole dimension with no knowledge of the world i originated from., assuming of course that humans can even survive being in the ultra wormholes for extended periods of time.

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So you're going to take me- the poor bastard that had to hide from their abusive parents in the woods- and give me to a decidueye instead? Well, it can't be any worse...

> Flash forward to age 30

I'm exactly the fucking same except for two things: I'm not a poorfag scambling for freelance scraps anymore! My marksman training and removal from humanity has left me as a trained killer for the Air Force. I also never broke my ankle from being thrown against the wall so I'm about 60 pounds lighter.

Thanks Ghostdad for sucking less than realdad.

>vanilluxe
Hahaha fuck I'm dead

>Xurkitree
neat so i get a wired dad that is fun and teach me how to spew electricity

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>>31504454
b-brother?

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>>31504412
I get some excellent Dance-moves I guess.

>>31505288

>A dom mother

Until you evolve into one, which you won't, your basically her kicking bag

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>>31504412
>its Christmas everyday now
Im ok with this

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hm

>>31508330
I guess the poor fish didn't learn from the first human and decided to try again.

>Parasect

Haha, time to learn to let mushrooms take over my brain.

>vileplume
uh

>>31509392
>tfw i have a mind control fetish
wanna trade parents?

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Run away and zap things I guess

>Seaking

Yeezy?
muther fucking gay fish

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cave dwelling and sun baking i guess

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Spending a lot of time trying to see through walls.

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>>31504412

>Blissey

>have a loving mother that brings happiness
>live in urban environment
>become unfailingly caring and pleasant
>potentially seek a career as a Pokemon doctor

Sounds awesome.

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>Celebi

Best mom ever! I would live in a magical forest while traveling through time :3

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I can run fast with rocks.

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>Greninja
>Proceed to become a weeb and job to the son of Charizard

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>"now that you're old enough i think it's time i taught you how to punch. since you're a beginner i thought i'd start you off with a soft target"
>"dad that's an alolan vulpix"
>"yes. i want you to punch the vulpix"

>Regigigas
I guess we just sleep all day

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i wonder what tinnitus feels like

>>31510083
fuck i forgot nfes. chimecho will give me tinnitus, but make me the best ribbon dancer ever.

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>Be best pokemon's son
>die because it lives in ozone layer
a-arigato ne
Well, if I survive I get to destroy meteorites and tell Kyogre and Groudon to fuck off

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>Magnezone
Guess I'm Magnet Man now

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>>31504412
...fuck

>Leavanny
I guess I'll learn how to weave leaves into nice clothing and other things. And learn how to eat donuts

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I guess I like the cold now.

>Azelf
Mama is gonna teach me some sick psychic powers, neato.

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*tips*

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Hi.
This is my dad.
He does what he wants. He has an ideal, he's gonna get that shit.
He taught me how to get what I want.

Which was shorting the housing industry.

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this is best case scenario for me

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>>31504412
I would evolve into another Eeveelution. Jolteon or Vaporeon.
I like Eevees, so not even mad

>>31504533
>>31504454

>Hypno

Guess I'm a registered hypnotherapist now.

I got Hypno...

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>>31512021
>>31512035
What

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I scream all night and become really good at playing the violin.

>mega lucario
i sudoku

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> All people have legendaries as adoptive fathers

Suuuure...

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I can't wait to tear things to shreds with my soon-to-be deformed hands!

>>31512762
And Megas. Common Pokémon? Nah, they never appear in that webpage.

>>31505205
Learn to punch shit with your mind?

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i live in a volcano now.
Join team magma maybe?

>>31505935
>being literally connected to the planet
>being able to Journey to the Center of the Earth
>being able to shape the planet as you wish, at will
Seriously now?

>>31508291
You'll never run out of power again. Maybe you'll even learn to harness the inherent electrical potential of the human brain and the nervous system, and use it to do cool shit

>>31509985
Or become really good at using rope to do things? :^)

>>31511077
Or you can learn to fix the ozone layer, save the planet, and make Fug proud.

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Well, uh... I guess all I can say is that he hasn't been in my life much...

But honestly, Shadow Thief parent? I'm down for ALL that.

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>>31512762
Kricketune, Flareon, Magnezone, Musharna, Doublade, Garbodor, Chingling, Lycanrok, Blissey, Druddigon, Luxray, Seaking, Parasect, Vileplume, Vanilluxe, Salazzle, Churbi, Clawitzer, Pyukumyuku, Toxicroak, Mimikyu, Shuckle, Cacturne, Tsareena, Mienshao, Wailord, Delibird, Wishiwashi, Sunflora, Maractus, Lunatone, Gorybus.

D'ya even LOOK at the thread, brah?

>>31505473
Oh, hey were brothers now with a Shuckle dad.

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i setup rocks and die first, ard lets get it

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So I'm either the Prince of Bees, or just a really big Combee.

Dhelmise
>>31504454
Pretty much what this guy said

>Oranguru
So I get to be a good leader-type? That's neat.

>>31513025
>actual shadow-boxer
>"he hasn't been in my life much"
Look down behind you.