Pokemon Fanfiction General and Writethread

first for I don't write nor read

>>29990134
Wrong previous thread:
>>29813149

Delayed as fuck, but the side-character game is tight

>>29990134
>Topic Of The Thread: How do you expect the new game to affect your writing? Delay it? Inspire it?
My turnaround is so damned slow "delay" isn't possible, and I don't have a new game boy so I won't be playing the game soon if ever so it won't be affecting my writing but tangentially.

http://pastebin.com/g4pitjPi

Alright bois, threw together a little somethin' somethin' with the 4chan Winter Ball thing.

Not exactly pokemon, I figured I'd post it in here for other writefags to see as well. At least the ones who don't go on the IRC.

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Oh hey a new thread.
Have a recap of what little we got from last 2 threads

Fic recap

Guilenight made a fic about the two Magma admins finding a raunchy secret of their leader's involvement with the enemy.
Suggestive, but SFW for now
http://pastebin.com/bdSS6C7i

An anon makes a short quip about the reveal of someone related to Ash. SFW
http://pastebin.com/jYuY69ir

SexTheHex makes more love between pretty boys Sun and Calem, with Z-power fairy shenanigans. NSFW
http://pastebin.com/npY8nLaQ
Updated Fics:

OrangeCitrin's Close Contact fic chapter 2 (WIP)
http://pastebin.com/sQp6PEmE

Strike Flash's Platinum adventure fic chapter 13
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12024240/13/Pokemon-Flash-Platinum

Ing's Stray Chapter 2
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12223183/2/Stray

Ee4ee's revised BSTF chapter 8
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12125737/8/Big-Shoes-to-Fill

Unown's Fledglings chapter 43
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11084689/43/Fledglings

Authors and/or anons looking for things to write can look through the ideabin here for something good.
Feel free to request ideas be put here.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1X072SSWulcC6RJRrPA6v9XtyohRybvMBl6Fh49wHsRw

-
Honorable mention goes to Big Disaster, who delivers have tsreena fic after such a delay. NSFW
http://pastebin.com/F17Zx5Ke

>>29990134
I was starting to think nobody would make a new thread before D-Day. This probably won't last past tomorrow, but let's try to make it count.

>TOTT
It'll probably delay me for a bit, but then inspire me (I hope). I'll take some time off from writing to play for a bit, but I'll probably end up getting some ideas from the games which I'll be able to implement in my writing, especially because some of the things I've been brainstorming and working on involve Gen VII Pokemon.

And in case Ee4ee happens to see this: I'm working on putting together some comments on the last chapter of your story, which I just got to read recently. If I don't get it out before D-Day I might try to post it in the IRC, assuming I can get that site to work. For some reason, the last time I tried going there I couldn't connect to the site.

>>29990134
Delay, without a doubt, but I still want to push out another chapter of ACPC and OV. Maybe if I buckle down I can get it out today and not feel bad about the incoming radio silence.

>>29994470
Just download and use Hexchat instead or whatever plays nice with your chosen OS. It's better than finagling with the site.

>>29994613
I could try that. I haven't looked into this whole IRC thing very much; I just assumed it was all based off the site and wouldn't need any downloads to use. I'll look into it and figure out what I should do to make it work.

Also,
>finagling
I've never seen that word before but now I want to start using it.

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Oh shit, thread's back up

>>29994470
>And in case Ee4ee happens to see this: I'm working on putting together some comments on the last chapter of your story, which I just got to read recently. If I don't get it out before D-Day I might try to post it in the IRC, assuming I can get that site to work. For some reason, the last time I tried going there I couldn't connect to the site.

Thank you! I'm not sure when you might have gone over it, but I added a couple more scenes at the end of Ch.8, one from Cathy and one from Steven's perspective. The former needs to be revised, but only a tiny bit, and I'll leave that for when I'm done with everything.

Gimme the summary; good bad or ugly?

I'm 10.5k words into Ch.9 and still have one more section to go, suffice to say it won't be out before the game's release. I'll try to make it not soon after, and Ch.10 will be faster. On one hand Ch.9 has been flowing really good for me, and I think that's promising. On the other hand, handling the climax is delicate work. I hope I've threaded the needle.

Back to work.

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>>29995488
fug this board is cruising
pre-release jitters?

TotT: Maybe delay a little bit, but I managed to get Ch.7 finished before I dug into Explorers of Sky so I don't think I'll be too badly impacted. I really really want to finish it up. I was hoping I could drop it before release more so my readers aren't off playing the game, hah

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>>29996611
I thought everybody was already playing it.
And taking it online.
And getting stop-right-there-criminal-scum'd by the Jenny web patrol.

>>29995488
I went over it a day or two ago. I don't recall seeing those new scenes of which you speak; I must've read it before they got added. I'll read them at some point, though.

> Gimme the summary
I thought it was mostly good, but with a few issues. Nothing too major, but I do want to bring them up anyway. I'll explain the good and the bad in more detail later tonight, though.

For now, I'll start with these two minor problems:
> Michael could only let out a confused "What?" before Starmie had gathered it's wits again
its, not it's
> Silence dominated the area, giving the area a disquieting peace following the battle
Might want to replace one of the "area"s with a synonym to avoid repetition

And there's a few larger problems too, albeit nothing super big that requires scrapping the chapter or anything. Just a couple things regarding what happens in the chapter that I felt didn't flow right, or sounded odd in some way. But as I said, I'll have to explain all this when I have more time. I've got some classes to take care of right now. Gimme 2 hours or so and I should get back to you.

Hopefully the thread is still alive then

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Someone in the last thread had asked for PMD comics, so here you go, fresh from reddit:

Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Victory Fire is one of my favourite online comics, the art is so consistent and beautiful. The artist occasionally pops in here.

Shinka: The Last Eevee - Strange at the start and entire plot doesn't make too much sense until you get to page ~350~. Has over 500 pages (First one released on 2nd of March 2009! More than 6 years old.). It does have some strange elements in it which makes it quite unique but never the less, still a great story. Author has been dealing with life issues and recently got back into updating after a 3 month hiatus so don't be surprised if it stops updating again. Updates on Monday and Thursday.

Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Mitigation - Mature audience warning, this comic can have some very dark themes in it. Prologue is in colour rest in black and white. (CONTAINS FAKEMON). Really good story though.

Pokémon Mysterious Dungeons: Born Again - Only has had it's prologue finished and the author is contemplating shutting the comic down and rebooting it due to deviating too far away from the plot. Very good comic though, great art style. Plot is quite weird and isn't explained very good being in the prologue still. But still worth a look, even though it may never finish. Updates TBA.

>>29997839

while we're on the subject of eviscerating ee4ee I'd like to point out that this sentence doesn't make sense to me:

"If these pokémon were slaves they were very content ones, and rarely did a negative emotion about their trainers cross their mind besides a yearning to return to them."

"a yearning to return to them" doesn't sound like "a negative emotion" to me, maybe change it to something like "rarely did a strong emotion" or whatever

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Pokémon Break! - The comic has a very weird start. You could skip to the 3rd chapter as the first 2 are based far ahead in the timeline. Good comic though, art style isn't the best but gets much better as it gets to the later chapters. Characters are good as well. Not PMD related but still a good comic to read. Updates are not in a schedule, they come out at random (~2-3 strips a week). I'm posting a link, because of some TCG issues.

http://pokemonbreak.smackjeeves.com/comics/641828/chapter-one/

Gigi's Nuzlock Runss is a bunch of comics which are nuzlock adventures of different pokemon games. There is one for PMD: Sky and it looks very nice. The story is the same as Explorers of Sky but has tweaks to make it more interesting and funny. Really good read if you haven't played the game (if your reading this you've most likely have) or to get ready for PSMD. (Click on the chapters with an S at the start for PMD: Explorers of Sky. The ones with the E next to it are for Pokemon Emerald and W is for Pokemon White)

There's a few more that I know I am missing.

TTOT: Heh, I don't expect either to do anything to it. Minty has caused me some creative constipation that only got cleared up with this massive-ass paper for my fiction writing class, so really...nothing's going to change, because I need a bit to get started back up.

Requesting a fic about guzma and the rest of team skull going to a psychiatrist

>>30000289
Wouldn't you rather a story about Guzma BEING a psychologist?

>After some time has passed, Guzma breaks the silence. He nods and says "Thank you for your time. I think this was a good talk and allowed me some real deep insight into your mind. I think it's safe to say that Y'ALL ARE STUPID!"

As for PMD comics I unfortunately lost the big list I posted a few weeks ago but here's some stuff worth reading:

Long stories:
Lament of the Fallen (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11645253/1/Pok%C3%A9mon-Mystery-Dungeon-Lament-of-the-Fallen): Gritty and dramatic, if you like a darker take on the series with an unusual protagonist this looks promising.
Power Trip (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10483318/1/Pok%C3%A9mon-Mystery-Dungeon-Power-Trip): Not your typical PMD setup but has solid action and unique takes on pokemon societies. Has finished already, which is a plus.
Aquifer (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8988873/1/Aquifer-A-Prophet-s-Guide-to-Dungeeonering):
Takes a psychological approach to PMD and creates some rather disturbing drama at times. Unfortunately unlikely to ever finish.
Silver Resistance (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4298303/1/Pok%C3%A9mon-Mystery-Dungeon-Silver-Resistance): Possibly the most well known PMD fanfic. Great characters, a rich world and solid writing throughout make this an enjoyable (if at times overwhelming) experience.

One-shots:
Unheard (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3211014/1/Unheard)- Sadfic #1. Stop skipping those 1-star missions you cruel monsters.
Escort Mission (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5382315/1/Escort-Mission)- Sadfic #2. Why you REALLY shouldn't skip those one star missions.

Comics:
Tales of Elysium (http://www.ssp-comics.com/comics/toe/?page=1): Has great art, likable characters, intense action and is updated regularly. Involves magic, prophecies and pirates.
Victory Fire (http://victoryfire.smackjeeves.com/chapters/43098/book-1-the-girl-and-the-ghost/): Has some great drama and a unique art style while managing to combine many elements of the different PMD games into one canon.
RAD (http://pmd-rad.smackjeeves.com/chapters/61735/chapter-1-tasks-and-meetings/): Your mileage may vary on the art style and it isn't updated as often as the other two but the quirky characters have a lot of emotion and are fun to read.

>>29998707
I'll help keep the thread alive until then, feel free to just fuck my shit up when you come back

>>29999778
I intended it to read as they were missing them, and the yearning/missing was the negative part, IE unhappy to be separated. I'll rewrite this in my next revision of it, thanks.

>eviscerating ee4ee
g-gotta git gud...

>>30000617
No PMD comic rec list is complete without BRT
http://xofks12.deviantart.com/art/PMD-Comic-Blue-Rescue-Team-1-1-581896821

And here's a brand new comic I just found this week with a nice art style and absurd update speed:
http://adenturesofteamsunflower.smackjeeves.com/comics/2353222/adventures-of-team-sunflower-cover/


>RAD: ymmv on the art style
Rodney's hair bothered me a bit at the beginning, then it tripled in size along with his ears and now it bothers me a lot.

>>30001348
>gotta git gud

Two pieces of fanart means you're leagues ahead of at least 80% of writers, perhaps more.

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>>30001348
I come bearing the gift of commentary. How much it fucks your shit up is to be determined.

First off, one good thing about the chapter is: I really like all the descriptions you give of the mental battle between Latias and Starmie. They were pretty interesting to read, considering the actual battle was little more than them concentrating, along with (I like to imagine) making weird faces while doing so in the case of Latias. Starmie would too if it had a face.

But the first problem is this: I feel like Starmie might persist a bit too long with trying the whole direct mental assault thing. Maybe it should've given up on trying to bust through Latias' shield and just go with tangible attacks once it realized its attacks couldn't break the barrier. That said, it might just be my personal opinion, and I don't think it necessitates a rewrite.

Secondly, Steven seems to just stand there and do nothing the whole time, even when Starmie clearly is failing at its goal. Considering Steven seems to be a pretty irritable guy, I'd imagine he would get more active when Starmie fails, perhaps shouting at it to keep trying or maybe even rushing Michael to attack him personally, instead of just waiting for Michael's mind to snap in twain or whatever he's ordered Starmie to do to him.

Also, if Steven wanted to murder Michael, as it seems he does considering Latias detects a "killing intent" in him, why would he do it when Cathy was there as a witness? Unless he's insane, or is enough of a stone cold killer to waste her as well despite her being an innocent bystander. Seems like he'd rather wait until later, when Micheal was alone, unless he's just that impatient (or just totally remorseless like I said before).

...Okay, this is getting way longer than I thought it would. Part two coming soon.

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>>30001348
>>30002838
Alright, next up: Cathy. While reading the fight scene, I found myself wondering where she went, because she approaches Steven before Michael does, but then she vanishes once the fight begins. There's a part after the fight where she's said to have fled when the fight began, but perhaps including a line or two earlier showing where she goes would prevent readers from feeling that confusion during the fight itself.
Of course, that's assuming that I'm not the only one who gets confused by that, which I can't confirm or deny by myself.

Continuing on the subject of Cathy: I have very mixed feelings about her whole anti-Pokemon spiel. I remember reading in one earlier chapter that she seems a bit perturbed by the presence of Michael's Pokemon, but it still came as a bit of a surprise to see her spout those conspiracy theories about Pokemon "infecting" people with insanity. Pokemon are such a huge part of the world, and so many people have Pokemon partners, I think it's a bit odd she'd have such a prejudice against them and their trainers considering there are plenty of cases of completely ordinary people who have Pokemon partners that refute her ideas.

But I also believe that it's an interesting type of ideology to give to a character in the Pokemon world, considering that, like I said, so many people accept Pokemon as a part of their lives. So perhaps it is a good thing to have her hate Pokemon despite living in the Pokemon world. It adds a viewpoint to the story that one wouldn't expect to see in such a setting, but I still think it's a bit unexpected and lacks evidence. That said, I haven't read the appended scene involving her, and it's also possible I forgot part of another chapter where she details her ideology, so if I'm missing something here that better backs up her viewpoint, then I'm sorry.

...I'm also sorry this commentary is taking three posts to complete. I feel like I could've said this in far fewer words. Final part coming soon.

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>>30001348
>>30002838
>>30002993
And now for the fabled part three.

After Latias faints, I think the fight scene is just fine. In particular, I think having Flufftail attack Steven himself was a good inclusion. It shows how vicious Flufftail can be, referencing what you wrote last chapter about him having been bred for battle.

But you also said in that chapter that he acts like he "made a terrible mistake by following [Michael's] instructions" while Michael was training him, but he never acts like he thinks he's making any mistakes in the fight. I'm not sure if that's actually an inconsistency or just me misreading, though.

Another thing: if I remember correctly, you also modified chapter 4 at some point, right? I skimmed chapter 4 and reached the scene where Michael does a video chat with Steve. I saw one problem with it. Michael explains that Steve was fired once Michael got his machines installed at the Center, but then Michael says he has no idea why Steve is acting upset. Honestly, it seems like it should be obvious that Steve is angry because he just lost his job, even if he did get one to replace it, as Michael mentions. It just felt a bit weird to see Michael act so oblivious.

Also, he's always referred to as "Steve" before chapter 8, but in chapter 8 he's called Steven. It's just a small inconsistency, but it might be better to keep the same name on him, especially because even the narration changes what it calls him between the two chapters.

...That took longer than I expected, but that's all I have to say. Except one last thing: overall, I think the story is a pretty good one, and I think the dedication you've shown to this story, what with your going back and revising it a bunch (even though that does run the risk of confusing people who've already read the earlier parts) is pretty admirable. In the end, I feel like this will turn out to be a story you can be proud of, and I'm looking forward to its conclusion.

>>30002838
>I really like all the descriptions you give of the mental battle between Latias and Starmie
Thank you! I was actually really concerned about that, and it led me to cutting it out entirely in the first version of the chapter. It was even worse than weird faces; just the buzzing in Michael's head and Latias fell out of the sky. I put it back during the revision process because it turned what I wanted to be a moment of decent competence into what looked like her most incompetent yet.

>I feel like Starmie might persist a bit too long with trying the whole direct mental assault thing
I can see just where you'd get that impression, and it's my fault for cutting back the battle a little zealously. In the first draft of the battle I had a line mentioning psychic warfare works on dream-time, it feels a lot longer than it is. I ended up neutering this to something about her ignoring the outside world. Between Michael starting to mess with the storage controller on his arm and Latias opening back up after Starmie withdrew for good was maybe only 4-5 seconds, but in Dream Time (and by effort exerted by both parties) that may as well have been a ten minute battle, and Latias gave up her sense of time perception along with most of her other senses when she retreated, mucking that up further still

>why would he do it when Cathy was there as a witness? Unless he's insane
Well, he is a subtle kind of insane yeah, and he was fully intending to kill her after if he had to. He really didn't care as long as he dropped Michael, and he wanted Starmie to do it thinking it'd leave no evidence. This is explained a tiny but in the scene I added for him after.

>but perhaps including a line or two earlier showing where she goes
I'll look into adding something in the next revision pass on it.

>conspiracy theories about Pokemon "infecting" people with insanity
No conspiracy theory, but she does see it as a sort of pathology.

[cont.]

>>29990134
>ToTT
>How do you expect the new game to affect your writing? Delay it? Inspire it?

>implying we are not already elite procrastinatorfags so extra delays will be marginal compared to what we already have

But seriously. I write so slow already that if anything the release of the new games *add* activity for me, rather than remove it.

>I'm too hipster to be hindered in schedule by media releases like the commoneer writerfag.
>not hipster enough to not actually write anything instead and just let myths and "unpublished" scripts tied to my name organically emerge from society's innards after my death

>>30002993
>it's also possible I forgot part of another chapter where she details her ideology, so if I'm missing something here that better backs up her viewpoint, then I'm sorry.
Don't apologize, you would be right on the money coming at this before my revision. Chapter 4 wasn't the only part I changed, I made a substantial rewrite to the end of Chapter 6 too. It covers this specific subject

>but he never acts like he thinks he's making any mistakes in the fight
I've probably been more subtle than I have to be about what goes on in his head. He wasn't just trained for battle, he was trained for the underground lethal sort, and abusively trained at that. This point isn't really highlighted often, but here's the full list I think
>Ch.2: He attacks Latias on a hair-trigger
>Ch.3: He has a rescue case attached to his medical data
>Ch.6: (revision you haven't read), "fox with anger management issues" and many other details
>Ch.7: Michael's sparse details about his acquisition
I've tried writing him like a sort of gentle beserker pokemon; he gets in this battle-rage, but when he comes out he's always scared what he might have done, because of this dislikes battling. I may have noted Michael never gave him a command, he ran on autopilot from his past owner.

>It just felt a bit weird to see Michael act so oblivious.
Latias even points out he seemed mad at him in particular, it was mostly Michael's tiredness getting in the way. Lightly touched on in the Ch.6 revision that awaits you!

> it might be better to keep the same name on him
I honestly haven't kept track, since so much for him was added in revisions, but for most other characters I try to use their full name in narration even while using shorter names in dialogue. If this is related inconsistently I'll look it over.

Thank you for such an in-depth review! I hope I provided decent answers, and I'll make changes in the next revision pass I do for it. (I already know I have to revise a bit in Cathy's scene later)

P.S.
>>30002993
>It adds a viewpoint to the story that one wouldn't expect to see in such a setting
I've tried to get something like this for Michael too. He owns pokemon but doesn't consider himself a trainer and never battles. He has an extremely rare pokemon hanging all over him but doesn't make any move to capture. He has a hard time connecting to the more battle-oriented trainers. In a world of dogfighting, he owns one guard dog and one ex-dogfighter who is now just the family pet. He made his living making computer systems to track dogs and worked in a vet clinic once, that's his most significant interaction with the culture.

Cathy, instead, is the person who had a bad run-in with some family-unfriendly pokemon as a kid and still fears them. In line with the story's theme of "People dealing with tragedy poorly," she's the one who lets this past fear more or less rule her life. In the scene I wrote for her after it's mentioned she's tried getting together with some other men before, and it's never worked out because there's pokemon involved somewhere.

This not-trainer theme continues in PTTP, the planned sequel. The combat engineer is someone for whom her pokemon (12B Flygon) is her work partner, but not one who has trained for competitive battle and not one who has any interest in it. The one pokemon she DOES have that was trained extensively for fighting (CCT Absol), and level-wise is the strongest of the five, was trained for a combat support role and has half her moveslots taken by non-damaging and mutually exclusive moves.

I've tended towards the unconventional when putting together my characters. Frankly I think it's more fun to write. There's already enough pokemon fics with travel-the-region competitive-battle trainers, I don't need to retread that well-worn path.

>>30003543
>This point isn't really highlighted often, but here's the full list I think
In this moment you realize that people forget brief told details but remember shown implications. None of these details as described mean anything tenable to the reader till we see Flufftail assault Steven. A ninetales with "anger management issues" could mean "tears at flesh when irritated" or "whizzes on shoes out of spite" until either an example is shown or precise details are infodumped. (Hence the need for screen time to be given to supporting cast members.)

>>30003839
>(Hence the need for screen time to be given to supporting cast members.)
And you in particular have been riding me about this specific character, and I'm glad to have finally been able to give him some screen time in Ch.6 and Ch.8. He gets a bit more in Ch.9 but not about his past.

I plan on giving both Ninetales extensive time in the sequel, so I hope to be able to set all this up much better.

Oh shit /vp/ broke the 30000000 post. About time.

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cherish pls

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Shit, look what I did, at the cost of half the night's sleep.
Big Shoes To Fill, Chapter 9
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12125737/9/Big-Shoes-to-Fill
http://archiveofourown.org/works/7944409/chapters/19689262
This chapter is really big, and tries to do a lot of things. I hope it manages to succeed in them. Please tell me what worked out and what didn't!

Ch.10 will be much shorter, and will come soon. Thanks for sticking around, readers of mine.

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cherish!

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seriously do it though
I have to go to bed

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So what are some stupid things you guys do when you write?
>Small/normal Pokemon have mostly unique names
>Large/legendary Pokemon have super fucking generic names like "Frank"

>>30008144
I try to give them normal names

So it's releases day...and it feels quite slower than I imagine. Wonder if early leaks helped slow down the hype

>>30009702
I hope so. Maybe we can survive this day after all. Maybe.

Anyone else feel, 'emptiness' now that the games are out? The journey's over, there's nothing left to look forward to, no more hype.
I'm not even sure if I want to play the games anymore.

>>30010945
there's rumors about a S/M port to Switch which may come with bells and whistles, but nothing's confirmed.

>>30009702
I assume people either haven't gotten it yet or are playing it.

>>30011477
>Pokémon Eclipse / Stars for Nintendo Switch

>>29992759
m-more gay boys please

So, how do you guys keep track of plot events and changes? Anything like charts, maps, etc? Pen and paper? Or just a random text file or spreadsheet somewhere? Or is it all in the mind?

>>30013487
Sometimes I jot things down, but most of it is in my head, for better or for worse. It usually isn't a problem until it is. And when it is I'm usually kicking myself.

>>30008144
>nip names
>chink names
>gook names

gook is the slur for koreans right

>>30013487
Many, many text files over multiple different devices.

>>30014312
This, though 'a few' instead of 'many'. Most words within are details for scenes I want/might want to do. I've tried a couple different planning methods but discarded them

>>30013487
I never keep my ideas and notes in my head. I usually write that stuff down in text files on my computer or tablet, because I know I'll forget it otherwise. I also draw maps sometimes so I can make sure that I don't accidentally change where locations are.

>>30014312
>over multiple different devices
Synced then? That's bold.

>>30014700
>I never keep my ideas and notes in my head [...] , because I know I'll forget it otherwise.

I should commit more to commit things down to paper or something, thanks for the reminder.

>>30013487
Make note of specific things that should happen in a chapter before starting to write it.

>>30015432
Mine aren't even sync'd, hah. Sometimes I write with notepad tabbed down and my phone resting on the screen.

>>30013487
I do have a (partial, out of date) map, and somewhere a (partial, out of date) spreadsheet that exists only to keep the timeline consistent across my stories since some of them portray simultaneous or closely ordered events from different perspectives.

>>30015432
>synced
Hell no. My devices are all mismatched, but I'm not complaining since I got them for free. That's what email is for.