/ss13g/ spessmen on a spess station

First for deciding what to say first for

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second for CLOWN SHENANIGANS

waifus

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Top ten purest waifus.
And the top ten purest husbandos.

Sixth for fucking the pain away

>>135766705
alright let's see that baby's day out now

>>135767571
>you will never fuck mrpain
actually sixth for why live

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You're in deff maint and this guy comes up and asks you to look at his toy collection.

What do you do spessmen?

>>135767571
>>135768010
>sixth
You tried

>>135768010
>you will never fug deadpoo

and thank god for that

>>135768206
fuq
>>135768213
fuck you deadpoo a qt

>>135768198
Tell him "goofy, not now".

>>135766416

Here, Seems my computer is sperging out about connecting to byond.com all of a sudden. I tried downloading the latest client and I keep getting network connection errors after it goes 200kb in. I have no clue why since I have my firewalls off, anyone able to help?

>>135768010
>MrPain
>not nigglywiggly or duny
>>135768206
But I actually got the sixth post in the thread.

>>135768198
Ask the admins what coder put the Goofy shit into the game and ask for them to be removed forever

>>135768315
The ones I replied to were the fifth and seventh
Count again

>>135768315
it's replies you nerd not poets

>>135768465
Oh fuck
I aimed for the sixth post because there's a postcounter on mobile

>>135768465
>poets
wow my life is full of failure

>>135767458
Dilbert, I think you should kill yourself

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This is a great start for the thread.

22nd for VLR references.

Shiggy is a manslut

Anyone has the image that told us how to make a grenade with slime extracts?

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>>135769908

>>135770523

Can we replace Firelocks already? Also can we get inflatable doors for engineers to seal off airless areas and you can move through them without opening them.

>>135771048
fuck i forgot the next:
yes you are

>>135771130
>plasmaflood turns the station into a bouncy castle
FUND IT.

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>>135769385
How to 2d spessman:
>complain about minor inconveniences vocally and frequently
>talk about your interests that nobody else cares about
>refuse to participate in group activities

>>135771048
sergei pm me

>traitor
>bring AI with you, assassinate a greytide, survvie
>bro miner helps me hang onto life
>I bring AI with me to save him
>confess he was my objective
>assume the greytide died
>sigh of relief as I completed all objectives
>the bro minerbird's objective was to off me
>he unleashes a Goliath inside of the pod we're in
>still die
>we both didn't succeed all objectives

Priceless, I applaud you for that Umbasa.

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average lifeweeb player

THE BABY

>>135771856
no

>>135771130
Oh yeah because everyone immediately calls the shuttle due to the slightest gaping hole in the station already. I'll definitely spend the limited time I have deploying fucking firelocks relabeled as inflatable doors instead of FIXING THE ACTUAL PROBLEM

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>warden
>captain orders me to hand out guns
>give an assistant an egun
>less than 2 minutes later
>"HALP ASSISTANT LASERED THE IAA TO DEATH"
>"THEY'RE A LING OH MY GOD"

>>135772239
Never ever listen to retarded captains. They'll overrule you but it won't be on you.

>>135771130
>room full of deadly spiders
>try to escape through doors
>room I'm trying to enter has a tiny one tile breach in it
>"WAIT FOR AUTHORITIES TO ARRIVE"
>spiders catch up
>die
T-Thanks

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>latejoin as captain
>security chasing a giant baby around
>hear that the clown is dead on the tcomms sat and go on a quest to save him
>no idea what I'm in for now it's changed
>teleport out there
>see the clowns mutilated body
>steel myself for the worst
>nothing.... nothing...
>RUSSIAN WITH A FUCKING KNIFE LAUNCHES AT ME OUT OF THE DARKNESS
>FIGHT FOR MY VERY LIFE
>RUSSIANS WITH GUNS
>End up going on a doom style rampage through the satalite killing russians
>save the clown and get all kinds of crazy syndie loot
>get back and give rambling maniac a revolver and a clusterbang
>someone bombs the station and me and rambling fight our way to escape
>Security gets mad as shit at me for letting the crew have guns
>sit in the command station and celebrate a job well done with rambling, the clowns corpse and some random guy who stole the HoPs ID

good round

Whoever the atmos tech last round was that didn't touch a single thing in atmos all round, thanks for nothing. I didn't realize the work we were doing rebuilding medbay was worthless until it was too late because distro had 0 air.

>>135772239
Had I more time I would have made sure that IAA had a gun too as to at least make the fight between them fair.

>teach it how to say fuck and "gas the vox"
>feed it
>get him a bedsheet to sleep
>get him to medbay
>walk him
>he sees a Mommi
>"This is a Mommi, they BUILD"
>mommy
>MOMMY
>It fucking escapes
>IJUSTLOSTMYBABYINTHESHOPPINGMALL.jpg
>;MOMMY
>;AI LOCATE THE ABBY
>"It's walking towards space"
>it spaces itself
>lose myself in space
>station dies
>my fucking baby was outside sec in space and i went to the fucking hell and back

What was with the shuttle stalling? Did it really wait for ricky?

I've actually had an idea which I think might be worth picking up the basics of BYOND coding and trying to implement but I figured I'd post here first and see if you lot are actually interested.

Should I see if I can change firelocks to only block areas with pressure/temperate differentials large enough to knock people over? Having a bunch of firelocks blocking access between areas with similar kPa seems to irk a lot of people, and this would let airlocks still fulfill their main purpose but impede movement as minimally as possible. Issues I can see are the lack of airlocks on maintenance fucking with a larger area, and both good and bad changes to station atmosphere propagating faster in already effected areas. I'm not entirely sure if this tradeoff would be worth it to, so weigh in please.

>>135772838
They already only lock closed if the pressure differential is great enough to be problematic. Low pressure differences can get them closed, but anyone can open them without tools if they aren't flashing.

>>135773183
Yeah, but I'm thinking more like if there's not much of a difference they shouldn't even deploy at all. I feel like the intention is to provide buffer areas for atmospheric problems, but mostly people just run right through them with crowbars regardless so they really only end up impeding movement.

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Things have escalated, for some reason over night connection to byond.com does not want to work.

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>page 1

>>135771856
Who dis?

FUN ROUND

>>135772595
IAA here, holy shit.

I was given a taser actually, but I didn't get to use it because I got pushed by the air

Would it be possible to have the round end pages logged/posted somewhere after every round?
I like knowing what rounds I miss out on.

>>135773868
t. Morena

Discount Dan now has a vending machine that sells shoddy, space-china quality guns to angry grayshits and enterprising revolutionaries.

What are the weapons called?

>>135774508
no

>>135774527
Comrade Dan's Revolutionary Surplus

>>135774596
You know you want to.

>>135774445
They are. They're in the logs.

>>135774796
i do not

>>135774527
Discount Dan's Prison-Quality InstaShiv
EZ-Fire Bullet Propulsion Device
I-B-Gon Blinder
Supercharged Lay-Zer Pointer

I'm assuming all of these have a very high chance of backfiring on the user as well if not outright breaking on first use.

>>135774979
Oh shit, I forgot about those. Thanks

>>135775160
All of these names are goddamn spectacular.

>>135775393
All QUALITY merchandise has to have misspelled words and an overabundance of hyphens.

>>135774994
But

>>135774527
Discount Dan's Budget Bang-Sticks

>>135775581
but what?

would a tator garrote that causes massive suffocation damage and prevents talking be cool or would it be another waste of space

>>135775160
You've got to have a shitty-ass, one-use shotgun that sprays multiple projectiles all over the area and is only obtainable by hacking the machine.

>>135774527
Boomerbang.
It's a boomerang with an IED attached that explodes on touching something, whether it's your intended target, or you when the boomerang returns to your hands.

Don't miss.

>goon has health scanner eye replacements
>the sprite has little heart pupils
Cute

>>135776137
i want these

department based prosthetics when?

>>135774527
Colt 45 malt liquor

for the bottle stuns

>>135776006
Now introducing Discount Dan's newest item, straight from the lush, alcohol-laden atmosphere of Cletus VII... The McCoy Arms BewmStikk! Will it explode and greivously injure you? Who knows! I certainly don't! Now banned from a station near you!

>>135775579
Pea shooter: a revolver that shoots fruit, needs to be reloaded with welder fuel between shots meaning if you load it with more than one fruit you have to unload it first. Can be loaded with banana peels

Discount six-shooter: same as the pea shooter only you load it with dice which will always land on a six when fired. does 6 brute damage to anyone hit.

Blunderbuss: same as the makeshift version

Discount Crossbow: shoots metal rods like the vox raiders crossbow but 20% chance to fire with no force behind the shot dropping to the floor in front of you.

illegal item if you hack it:
Explosive shotgun rounds: when put it the shotgun and fired they explode destroying the gun.

>>135775859
Sleepy pen is like an objectively better version of that.

Replace sleepy pen with that and you're good.

>>135775859
>Hitman Bundle
>Comes with a garrote, SE injector with no prints, a pistol, and a suit

>skowron spawned himself the traitor chef cleaver as non-antag

>borg
>arrest nuke op
>LAW 2 UNCUFF ME
>uncuff
>tase
>cuff
Fun shit

G A T L I N G G U N
A
T
L
I
N
G

G
U
N

You got slimed kid.

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>>135774527

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>>135766934
how do I fuck the clown, /vg/?

I was told that was a /vg/ feature

>>135778316
I wrestled that nigger slime as long as I could.

>>135775581
morena why do you want bonk to message you

are you seriously that much of a giant whore that you're not satisfied with just shiggy

>>135778517
You got it all wrong, that's something for TEEGEE

Hey, kid.

I'm a waifu.

Stop all the shitposting.

Help waifu.

^%@#$%#$%^&*(*&.

>>135778563
Slimes a best at fighting. Super robust, free shock, and spliting if in danger to make more. Top robust.

>>135779101
i don't get this meme

>>135779386
Mental retardation isn't a meme, it's a condition.

>>135779101
>>135779386
>>135779521

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RH1ekuvSYzE

>>135779101
I DON'T KNOW MUCH ABOUT WAIFUS EXCEPT FOR THE ONE I GOT BACK AT MEDBAY, NIGGLY PUT A COUPLE OF MEMES ON IT AND I ERP WITH I--

>>135779832
>Niggly's your mom
I'm jealous.

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Hello friends, it's Killette2 here! No no I'm not going to push things from my github, but today I'm going to share with you what I did on the test server. Here we see cryo, the backbone of medbay, as many doctors feel helpless without this contraption. But why am I posting about cryogenics? You will find out in my next picture and post.

I'M SORRY

I THOUGHT WRENCHING THE CANISTER DOWN MEANT WHEN YOU OPEN THE VALVE IT GOES INTO THE PIPES

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

>>135780584
ick ock bannu

>>135780506
fuck off

>>135780584
ahelp it faggot

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>>135780506

Cryo is fun and all, but what happens if we mix it with EXPLOSIVES? Here we have three beakers. A 15 unit mix that turns into nitroglycerin, a 10 unit mix or potassium and water, and a 15 unit mix with potas and water with 5 units of tungsten as a filler chemical, to be 15 units just like the nitro beaker.

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>>135780770

Ah nice we found some volunteers! Unfortunately the staff of change is gay and gave me every single race BUT human when on the human setting, so I settled for catbeast. That's to be complained about another day.

>>135780756
"blow on it"

>>135780584
Are you me, this was my first mistake in ss13 that was ban worthy. Dont feel alone anon.

>>135780506
Fuck off and go away

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>>135780986

Here we have a 15 unit nitro cryogenics, if you're unfamiliar with cryogenics, it multiplies the chemicals it seeps into you slowly, not using them all at once.

This 15 unit nitro mix caused 4 explosions before the victim died and cryo ceased to work on the victim. I was also knocked down once.

>>135781365

Here is the victim after we pulled him out of the cryo tube, poor guy. Also let me note, when it comes to glycerol it takes 1 corn per 1 glycerol unit, or 3 corn oil to make 1 glycerol for when you have higher potency corn. Be careful when trying this in your own medbay!

>>135781553
Wow! They vanished!

>>135781009
Ahahahahahahahahahaha

AHAHAHAHAHA oh man. I kill me.

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>>135781553

Also here's the picture!

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>>135781786

Oh my, that cryo treatment surely didn't fix up this patient. In fact, he seems much worse off! Note how there is only brute damage in this form of explosion, there may be different damage types in later scans! the broken bones and bleeding are icing on the cake, making surgery, blood transfusions, and a defibulation needed since cryogenics is not very functional.

>>135781786
I thought it would be interesting, but instead it's some shitty boring way to kill people in cryo just like millions of other ways

>stop playing ss13
>come upon lewd birdbot /ss/
Wow it's like the shitposting on the thread is following me.

petition: rename borers to yeerks

>>135782010
>defibulation
you had to cut out his calf bones?

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>>135782010

Heres 5 water 5 potas... nothing happening really, so let's skip the other beaker too. There were lots of explosions and the victim going unconscious every now and then, but no real damage was done the entire time the beaker was emptying.

>>135782505
That's because cryo uses on_touch not ingest so the water doesn't get transferred to him right.
>>135782010
Or just fucking clone him. Which is also done with a pure polyacid mix. Or even better just use smoke.

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>>135782505

And the results are... it's fucking nothing! Guess we can reuse this patient. Now let's pull out the big guns that we've all been waiting for...

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>>135782704

50 units water 50 units potas. This sure seems effective! It killed them in two booms, more effective than that nitro we worked hard for (except we spawned the corn so whatever).

>>135782680

It appears the water gets transferred just fine in this image

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>>135782938

Hmmmm it appears the water potassium explosion also caused burn damage. Why would this be? Who knows, but it seems if you want to fuck someone up, a 50/50 water potas mix is just as effective if not more than a 15 unit nitro mix. Also when I ejected the beaker I got to keep 49 water and 49 potas, so it's much more economical too.

>>135782938
Right, I was thinking about polyacid or mutagen, the other reagents with on_touch

>>135782505
>>135782680
It's because the water/potass reaction is WAY too small to cause damage. Same reason medbay uses small explosions to clear the body of reagents

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>>135783250
>brute damage: 1.49012e-008
>other wounds: none
That's a fucking strong leg

>>135783486
e-008, friend, not e+008
It's tiny

>>135783486
Anon that's not how scientific notation works

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>>135783250

NOW FOR THE BIG GUNS

30/30/30, a 90 unit nitro mix, which took a total of 30 normal corn (normal potency since it was sandbox spawned). To make, surely the botanist is to blame if this ever happens on the live server! Any guesses on what will happen next before the final image?

>>135783486

I'm sorry friend, but that's a e-008, not an e008, so it's more like 0.00000001 I'm not even counting the zeroes but you get the point, it's barely any damage which is why the leg isn't broken and their damage is only totaling up to -148.8 at the top.

>>135783635
>>135783659
>>135783661
Oh
Well I'm a fucking dumbass and read that wrong
Whoops

>>135783486
That's 0.0000000149012 damage, not 14901200.

>>135783661
>surely the botanist is to blame
You can get corn oil from the deep fryer or trail mix.

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>>135783661

OH MY!

I was unfortunately the doctor who put the guy in, and would not want to be the doctor in the future. This is a great way to surprise medbay, have fun kids!

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>>135784016

While corn oil is in the deepfryer, you can't actually remove it unless you deepfry food in it, then grind up the food. However you can use the frier as a bomb instead like I did in this picture, which was also a very fun round.

>>135784027
This wouldn't happen in the live serb unless the doctors threw a naked guy in.

Fucking kill yourself Killette

>>135784374
Clones tend to be naked.

>>135781306
>>135784423
>killette is posting something interesting
>KELL URSELV XD
yeah fuck you as a medbay employee I like to see shit like this

>>135784580
Yes, but doctors also tend to throw clothed people inside. Note how I didn't say "this won't happen"

>>135784374
>>135784580
>>135784736

What does the person being naked or clothed have to do with them being put in cryo? A hardsuit wasn't even mentioned, and it's common sense not to do that.

>>135784897
I'm not sure, so let's go through what's happening:
Cryo has 30u pacid, 30u glycerol, 30u sacid.
Cryo givea its occupant half of its beaker's contents and removes 1u from its beaker.
The occupant now has 15u pacid, 15u glycerol, 15u sacid.
It gets made into 45u nitro.
Boom.

I'm not sure why their clothing would matter.

>>135785158

Thank you for the explanation on cryo. This explains why the 50/50 water potas mix was on par with the 15 nitro mix, and why the 5/5 water potas mix was useless.

>>135781306
>>135784423

Anon what did I ever do to you? Is something wrong with these pictures?

>>135782306
Man I haven't felt like this since when I was going through puberty.
I guess that I'm into borgs and vox now.
Someone kill me.

>>135785581
Oh please, nearly every one of my fetishes is in this game.
When people talk about it, it's just annoying.

>>135784897
>>135785158
Clothing blocks the "50% of the beaker is transferred on the guy" most of the time depending on the clothing, Cryo still works just fine since the 1u transfer still works but the mix gets sucked up faster.
In this case it wouldn't transfer only 1u waterpot.

can someone tell hanako to suck someones dick to get the slime things done already? what is she even doing is it still unfinished or something

>>135786067
You're right. This seems to be the case.

>>135785730
But you don't understand anon.
It fit so well to the shitposting, I think it got to me.
Also it's been more than an hour and it won't go down, I think I need to see a doctor.

>>135785730
>tfw your fetish isn't allowed in the game

julia is cute

this has been your hourly waifu post from shitposting inc

>>135786831
You get used to it.
I'm personally coding ERP to get it out of my system.

>>135786070
Testing and bugfixing take time, especially when you do it for free.

>>135786921
is it rape

i bet it's rape

>>135787110
maybe

>>135787110
Mine is toilet desperation and failure to make it in time

>>135786984
>coding ERP

but that's already in it's called /me

>>135787208
i too wish to rape waifus

>>135786984
Which server is taking in your work?
Also ERP is gross to me.

>>135787291
I can't /me with myself.
I'd rather be in full control too.

>>135787291
but anon, i'm on the other end of that fetish

>>135787307
It's more of a personal thing. I'd be fine with releasing it to anyone who wants, but I can't figure out how to make it so sex will loop by itself, so for now it just uses a primitive spawn() that has you cum after some time.

Which is kind of boring.

>>135787375
who u

meet me at vore

>>135787585
never telling

>>135787110
Mine is movement-impairing breasts

>>135787663
tell me

My fetish is fat balding nerds taking on positions of power in an online video game and trying to sound like a fearful authority while punishing other players left and right for trivial reasons.

>>135788646
I got you senpai

>>135788646
My fetish is fat balding nerds pretending to be girls and calling themselves "waifus" and shilling themselves in a thread about a game server they are slowly destroying

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>>135788823
That's why I always come back, fäm.

>>135784423
you shouldn't tell people to kill themselves online

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>>135788947
>tfw some random anon on the thread actually calls your vox character a waifu/husbando

>>135787756
fine
i'm pure publically but really i'm not

>>135789265
niggly is that you

>>135789191
>playing vox
I legitimately want non-antag vox to be removed

>>135789547
oh god no

>>135789614
Ok anon, I don't mind either way.

>>135789641
julia :^)

>>135789979
>Julia
>Pure publically
I think I know who but not saying either

>>135789614
I personally want all non-humans to be removed from the character creation screen.
But while they're there I might as well use a few.

>>135790140
say it goddamnit

Okay what about this
Blind-Like rare mutation, but instead of being just blind, the little stuff you see is filtered in a blueish color and you can sometimes hear people behind walls, and you have a rechargable power that randomly lets you see something in your 13x13 range of vision for an instant?
I mean, its just an idea, im not asking for it to be coded

>>135790162
GOD TIER
Human

GOOD TIER
Grey

OVERPOWERED AS FUCK TIER
Dionae

SHIT TIER
Plasmaman

IRREDEEMABLY SHIT TIER
Vox

>>135790347
>FINE TIER
>Human
>IRREDEEMABLE GARBAGE TIER
>everything else
Fixed.

>>135790241
How about you try to find out for yourself

Post worse staticnamers
>Patrick Bateman
>Rail Kinson
>Dr. Slippy someshit
>Julia/Julianne (Don't know if they are the same)
>Mai Pai

>tfw your waifu is a slut but the ERP game ridiculous

>>135790492
no

>>135790529
Annie and yahir are the worst

>security themesong
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dfyNnUgK8qE

>>135790347
>OVERPOWERED AS FUCK TIER
>Dionae

Is it 2014 again? A lit welder takes out a dionae like a joke, git robust.

>>135790529
Nick Weller is the worst staticnamer.
Permaban when.

>>135791113
Hi liltiptop

>>135790994
>diona vs blob
If the diona has a flare, it's unkillable

>>135790701
Fucking fine
I think it's one person I know is an irl grill so why don't you find out for yourself

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WE MOMMI CHESS NOW

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>>135790347
>diona overpowered as fuck
>plasmamen not overpowered as fuck

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>tfw playing chess with other mommis on the derelict

that was fun and comfy

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>>135766934
WAKE ME UP

>>135791440
>>135791419
alan i told you we should've went to the derelict instead of going on the shuttle

>>135791564
[CAN'T WAKE UP]

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Reminder to save your waifus and take them to the beach.

>>135791314
A blob literally cannot kill a diona with enough lights.
It can, however, entomb said diona within itself so that the diona cannot escape by any means whatsoever.

>>135792097
Actually if spammed quickly enough you can send someone into crit as blob.
It's not a stretch to kill a diona as one, as much as brute is healed quickly, you don't heal from crit in a single second even as a tree.

>>135792440
Maybe the blob can kill diona but didn't bother that time. I don't know. But dionae are VERY powerful against the blob.
Imagine a diona with the Righteous Bison against a blob...

>furstation 13

WHAT THE FUCK

Checking this out

>>135791808
>tfw your waifu is a stool wearing sunglasses

>>135793308
ip?

>friend plays SS13 too
>always attempt to talk with them about the game
>any attempt at conversation is met with shilling for Paradise and why I'm not on it yet
>say I only go to /vg/station
>still attempts to shill the shitty server

Is there any way to make this poor soul see the error of their way?

>>135793430
If you look closely you see it's a faggot wearing sunglasses sitting on the stool

>>135793469
Just checked it out, it's public. Get in here boys, no admins

>>135792097
>>135792440
>>135792667
I was once turned into a blob at the bar close to a diona, I couldn't hurt them at all and they just slowly but surely killed me dead with hitting me with an improvised weapon.

I had killed half of the crew but ignored the diona which I figured would be stuck there forever, instead they'd break a blob square after a lot of hits and move on to it before it closed. They did that until they reached my core and killed me, spamming the expand command on them did nothing.

>>135793689
I can't tell you what to do but please, do not raid them in the name of our server.

>>135793487
Different strokes for different folks. Some people like leddit, some people don't.

But Paradise doesn't even have RPDs I don't know how they manage.

>>135794008
>>135791419
>>135791440
opinion?

>>135794008
raiding them in the name of /vg/, got it

>>135794089
Saw it, thought it was great, glad you came up with something fun as hell instead of just autisming with the TEG, Singlo and whatnot I left laying around.

>>135794148
On your head be it.

>>135794320
actual cuck

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>>135794008
RAID IN THE NAME OF VEEGEE

RAID IN THE NAME OF PROBE

DEATH TO FURFAGS

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>>135795393

hey its me the friggen probe

>>135787731
TIG OL BITTIES WHEN?
THIS IS INJUSTICE.

>>135797841
fuck off grimlock

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>Go to check my notes
>Anyone who has sex with this guy is just too lazy to jerk off. by JedediahSmith (Trial Admin) on Wed, July 23rd of 2014

Why does movement through space feel so slow and shitty now?

Dude

>>135798667
>go to check my notes
>pomf drew a cock in them

>thinking up all sorts of plans to do as a changeling
>fuck up and out myself immediately while trying to talk in hivemind
>go cry and eat monkey humans before I work up the resolve to go back to the station and use the hallucination sting on everyone until they decide to kill me
>shuttle called right as I start coming back
>horror form and sax around escape
Well. That last bit was fun at least.

>be det/warden
>arrest a mime cosplayer
>see with thermals a nig absorbing a guy i left in armory since he suicided the moment i was setting him free (twisted his neck after grabbing a gun)
>3 buckshots outta nowhere
>"o-ow"
Why do so many people say this?
As an antag some people say that when i stuncuff them in maint or just plain shoot them instead of bullshiting or shouting on comms

>>135798868
check another admin's notes and it is a circlejerk everytime

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>Check my notes.
>"Trigger finger" for shooting a clown to death during code red when they shot a tag laser at me.

>>135798971
Some people aren't shitheads who go 'HALP SEC GRIFFIN ME' as antag. Some people actually have a sense of comedic timing/humor/etc.

you can check notes now?

>>135798984
My last one is from Pain and says, quote: "Has all the latest news on waifus and husbandos, what a well informed member of the community!". It's not even true.

Notes for Furbeh :

http://hastebin.com/uwitovasuq.coffee

Adminhelp asking for it if you want your notes publicized

>>135797541
What's wrong with you?

>>135799184
yea just press f1 and type "show notes"

>>135799118
I mean, if you are going to be an antag why wast any opportunity to have the slim chance of getting away and trying to get your objetives or valids?
Plus
"o-ow"
is not humorous at all, its just retarded

>>135799489
>stuncuffed
>opportunity to get away

once the cuffs are on, you're not getting out

Don't be such a fucking sourpuss, man. Not everyone's a play-to-win dickhead.

>>135788947
My fetish is playing as a gay male and finding another gay male to be gay with for laughs, only for them to reveal in LOOC their Skype info and they prove to me that they're actually a woman IRL, and think that both my character and I are pretty hot.

IT KEEPS HAPPENING TO ME.
DOESN'T MATTER WHERE ON THE INTERNET I GO, I FIND THE IRL GIRLS PRETENDING TO BE GUYS WANTING TO GET OFF TO GAY SEX.

help

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>>135799479
Probably a lot but that was too good to pass up.

>>135799814
That's pretty bullshit

>>135799839
Not really, no.

>>135799448
>Ate a guys groin that was receiving treatment in medbay resulting in the player being gibbed.
My sides are in orbit

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>>135787731
I don't usually go for that far, but you still top notch in my book.

>>135800005
Hi bonk

>>135800135
Not bonk.
I'm still mad as fuck about some waifu shit though, hence the disbelief.

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>>135800005
>>135800468
I just have the worst (best?) luck at the same time. It's like having both max Luck and the Jinxed trait in Fallout 1+2.

It's the story of my life.

>>135801204
I end up being friends with a ton of spesswomen.

None of them think I'm cute though.

>>135800468
whatchu mad about son

>>135801520
Different guy, but one of mine does. I don't really want her as a relationship partner but it keeps me occupied.

>>135801739
f u c k o f f s h i g g y

>>135801724
Having to settle for an alternative.

>>135802009
hi shig

>>135802267
Hiya

>>135801739
I wish I was in your place.

>>135802775
Trust me, you don't.

>>135802376
have you tried talking to her about it
you should

>>135802009
Shiggy, get this through your head;

Ginger does not want anything to do with you.

She does not love you. She, at most, thinks you are a friend. Past that, she doesn't want a thing to do with you.

Get the fuck over yourself already, you miserable, drug abusing, poon chasing dumbass. There are other fucking fish in the sea. Go fucking catch one.

>>135801520
Was friends with two spessgirls. Both thought I was cute, and neither of us cared. Platonic is best tonic.

>>135803047
Mhm, but it just ends with us memeing at each other.

>>135803379
i don't think you really tried, shig

>>135803443
I'm content with things the way they are.

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I'm literally best friends and now coworkers with someone I met here on /vg/station. It's such a funny feeling knowing that I'd be missing out on a very great friendship if I gave away the first pAI I ever downloaded

>>135803591
see >>135800468

>want to play medbay
>whoops no chemists! Better get working on that mix fuccboi
alternatively
>latejoin medbay
>surely they have a well stocked fridge by now
>no items in stock

>>135803256
I am well aware, you memeing fuck.

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>core gets nuked
>captain walks into his office
>somehow doesn't notice the fucking wreckage and crater until he's getting tossed around by airflow

>>135803748
There were zero (0) memes in that post, my baneposting friend.

>>135803665
Those moments come and go but more or less, it's okay.
Why do I even shitpost at this hour

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>>135803716
>roundstart chemist
>two doctors, a borg, and the clown barge in and start squandering energy making what you've already made
>shoo them out
>another doctor notices the freed up chem dispenser and takes the opportunity to get more greasy fingers on the chloral machine
It didn't used to be this bad.

>>135784253
You can syringe it out

>>135803952
Box starts with 100 charge instead of 50 now, so that's something.

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>MD Double Agent
>Tasked with killing a scientist and just surviving so I run to arrivals bathroom and buy a screwed bundle, parapen and a pair of brass knuckles.
>Pocket the pen and bundle, hand the knuckles to the detective as some pre-appliance of relief to the stressful round ahead.
>Get a job change to Scientist so I can get closer to my target.
>Pass one of the two bombs I got from the bundle to my fellow-Grey scientist working in Telescience and chat a bit.
>Wait for the scientist to leave an opening, spot him fiddling with his PDA.
>Mytimeisnow
>Parapen then cablecuff him before dragging him to the research shuttle where I buckled him to a chair and took a bomb out of my backpack and set the timer for fifteen seconds.
>Shaking like a methhead as I grabbed a camera out of my backpack and snapped a picture of the poor sod before sending him off to the research station with the bomb ticking away.
>Wait half a minute before putting on my red spacesuit and recovering the mangled head of my gibbed target from the fleshy debris before taking it to Robotics and extracting the brain.
>Borg my target and chat with my brother in Telescience before asking him to teleport me to arrivals where I waddled to a pod and sat until the shuttle took off.

Well that was a rush, I managed to use a bomb without fucking over any departments.

>>135803256
Jeez, you could at least be nice about it

>>135803952
i rarely if ever see doctors clamoring to get anywhere near a chem dispenser

half the time, I'm forced to do cryo, chem, and the cloner, because the chemist fucked off to nowhere, the other doctors are lazy shits/'I AM SURGEON IS NOT MY JOB BBAWK!'/too busy ERPing with shiggy in the bar

>>135804049
Good thing no one blew a gigantic hole in the middle of the station

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>love this game
>every server is shit

why must it be this way

>>135803661
sauce? Have found it before but keep having issues finding it now

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>>135804341
Powertripping/autistic/furry server owners for one.

Just look at Paradise or /tg/ for good examples of autistic hosts

>>135804162
I prefer the virology area.

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>>135804341
The good ones either die quick like the old /v/ stations or get bogged down by retarded faggots over time. Just the nature of the game I guess.

>>135804613
for ERPing? it is isolated-ish.

>>135804162
Like I always say, giving doctors access meant good chemists found new autism corners, and chemistry became the intro job to medbay because you can go without them. People like it so I live with it but the inconvenience of a doctor having to get chemistry access from the HoP or the door bolted open from the silicons was better than chemists being turned into the 5th wheel.

>>135804013
Yeah that's a very thankful change. Only having 50 energy exasperated the problem to the point where a non chemist making whatever shit they feel like caused a serious downtime between when the chemists showed up and finishing the advanced chems. If I didn't have full energy on both dispensers then I'd run out before 12:10, and even if I did I'd still run out. I'd just get enough done to justify a break to go get a groans.

I haven't played chemist since that recent change to 100 but hopefully now the biggest worry will be the CMO bitching that I made iron the red oblong pill instead of the red round pill.

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>>135804323
Wasn't me, buddy ol' pal!

>>135804881
>bitching that I made iron the red oblong pill instead of the red round pill.
Don't listen to those people. Keep doing it the OBJECTIVELY CORRECT way

>>135805323
>iron
>red pills
NO

IRON IS GREY

OR GREY WITH A RED STRIPE DOWN THE MIDDLE

YOU SHIT

>>135805529
>IRON IS GREY
Fuck me I read blood not iron
Gimme a break, tired

>>135805749
>making blood pills

>>135805529
IRON IS FOR BLOOOOOD. BLOOD IS RED! RED!

>on hippie
>Be an assistant
>Searching maint for catbeasts
>Captured by some sexual deviant
>They bucklecuff me to a chair
>Strip me down and start dressing me up as a maid
>"I still have my dignity"
>deviant starts a monologue
>Doesn't realize I'm catatonic
>End up in a positronic brain
>Become a sec borg
>Head over to the deviants secret lair
>"But how did you find me?!"
>Immediately start harmbatonning him to death
>Gib him
>Bring catatonic body back to medbay
>Ghost
>Get to go back to being a human

>Dr. Slippy Joe M.D says, "Emggeged"

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>>135806479
Grats, you broke rules.
Though, you did give me a laugh. Here's one.

>>135806461
Blood is metabolised instantly. 50u is an instant ~8.9% IIRC. It was an okay way to spend time back when you could choose your blood type

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>>135806479
Lets all take a moment to thank Hippie for willingly being the containment server.

>>135806580
>He uses Doctor in his name
>When your profession is next your name in your id
reggggagtarded

>>135806647
>Blood is metabolised instantly.
When was that changed?

Why does no one make blood pills?

Are you sure?

>>135806735
He's an HoP

>>135806812
Unless it was changed recently, yeah

>>135806628
>>135806692
I don't even know what I would have to do to get permabanned, or even jobbanned.

>>135806647
Just ask botany for blood tomatoes or try to get an actual blood drive going
Maybe provide people with trinkets depending on their blood type

>>135806864
Huh I tested it just now and you are correct. Isn't that some shit.

>>135806812
It's been that way for as long as I can remember. It has to be in order for stuff like blood IVs and syringes to go directly into your blood supply instead of lingering in your internal reagent container.

>There are people that actually develop relationships with others through this game
>In order to do that, one or both of them would need to use the same name for countless rounds
>They form the metabond rather than just tell IRL friends about the game and do things that way
>Meanwhile I have my shit set to always random because I broke up a group of metagamers that regularly play
>By others grouping up, I have been left as an outlier
>I now vengefully validhunt metafriends

So how did you end up as a spessfriend? What were you like when you were younger? What are you like now?

>>135807784
>what were you like when you were younger
Shy, reclusive, friendless. A sad sight.
>what are you like now
Confident, bit rude, uncaring.
I like it this way.

>>135807784
>1
Parasite 2 from warcraft 3
>2
awkward video game nerd
>3
awkward video game nerd, but older

>>135808195
hi shig

>>135807784
>how did you end up as a spessfriend
i have no idea it just kinda happened
>what were you like when you were younger
i bit people. i was also usually lazy and kinda depressed
>what are you like now
depressed, nigh-upon constantly drunk off my ass, giant asshole, socially awkward

>>135808908
Hi bonk

>>135811245
what gave it away

>>135811338
the "I am a raging homo please kill me part"

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Zach got smoked by the rod at the end

Sorry if I ruined anybodies round for bombing escape

>>135804531
You forgot weeb

>your waifu will never love you

>>135812843
>your waifu loves another man

>>135811769
>suicide bombing escape to cleanse all the aliens
You did god's work, son. If the cloning machine wasn't fucked we could have just revived everyone and we wouldn't have been out anything. Not having engineers was a way bigger deal. The thing that really makes me mad is

>Spend ten minutes doing all research and setting up a chem dispenser/crew monitor
>someone sets up one fucking bomb and blows up half the station, forcing a round-end and there's nothing we can do about it
>round lasts 20 minutes and none of the other 24 players but the traitor get to actually do anything or have any fun

>>135813005
Who is it, anon?

>>135813224
i don't want to say

probably because you're gonna call me a cuck you baneposting twat

>>135813221

Right, I probably should have not ran in all crazy and stuff

But hey, I'm perma'd now so it wont happen again lol

>>135813294
I'm not him.

>>135813508
You were permabanned because you didn't answer ahelps. Not answering ahelps is always a permabannu.
Why didn't you just answer the ahelps?

>>135814125
To be fair, non-antag bombing is also often a perma

But yeah, why not answer the ahelps?

>>135814243
I feel that, since he bombed Escape to kill the aliens, the punishment might have been less harsh than someone that bombs just for shits and giggles.

>>135758716
>Not (E)RPing like a proper spaceman
Try rping a little instead of being a fun sucking powergaming faggot.

Wait a second
Looks from the logs that the only ahelp he received was "Are you fucking kidding me?"
I don't necessarily disagree with the ban, but at least try a BIT harder to contact the player.

>>135799049
I don't know why admins are such tightasses over that kind of baiting behavior. Especially when it's dindu's who clearly know to not fuck with sec as nonanag. Shit's tense and there's red beams flying so of course you'll shoot back with whatever you have handy which is usually a lethal on your vest instead of fumbling through your backpack or belt. You gotta act cause if it was serious you're already dead.

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>>135814884
Clown had it coming to her.

https://github.com/d3athrow/vgstation13/pull/8935

>>135805529
>Not the green circle
Wurst bay, why are you such a sauerkraut

>>135814125
>>135814243
>>135814363

I didn't see the ahelp, honestly I've never been ahelped before and I was kind of in shock that I made such a powerful bomb

oops

>>135815203
https://github.com/d3athrow/vgstation13/pull/8844

>>135815415

also forgot to ask, is the ahelp button under the admin tab where you see the ahelps? Sorry for not knowing this, I've been a relatively quiet player so I guess I just haven't gotten the opportunity to see what an ahelp is

>>135813221
All you need is six people that give a shit and 1 guy to keep recalling.

1 works on upping distro and repiping
1 works on getting boards and stock parts in lockers
3 work on glassing off the breach. Majority of the station is wasted space you can reuse in a fraction of the time and glassing off the breach lets you quickly render it irrelevant damage.
1 work on making sure the powernet reaches wherever you're relocating the bombed out shit to as well as having the air alarms working.

Station's back to 100% function in 20 minutes or less. Communicate what needs to be done where and how and get people to stake a claim. Back when I captained a lot we made it through a lot of singulooses that we bagged and bombings until we hit 3hrs and thye admins wore us down through xenos/nuke ops/deathsquad. It was great and we had a great time until the casuals dragged the station quality down to stubbed toe plox shuttle me reroll4antag!!!!

>>135815507
It comes up in your chat window unless you toggle the special window which shunts all the ahelp shit into a separate window so regular chat isn't drowning it out.

>>135815583

Yeah I guess I was just too pumped to die a blazing death of glory, while vaporizing the queen

But hey, thanks for the advise, I'll keep it in mind next time I try to become a martyr

>>135807784
>spess
Saw it on the BYOND hub a few years back, joined, and was hooked from there.
>younger
Shy, peaceful, nonviolent guy. Always withdrawn into my own thoughts, meditating, contemplating life, or reading a book. Loner by nature, because shitty friends in school broke my trust in people. I can't really give anyone a task, because they just pawn it off to someone else, and it never gets done. Those same shitty friends then went and used ME as the person they pawn all their obligations to, and whenever I asked for help, they would be conveniently absent. Stopped trying to be social 15 years ago. Relationships? Never.
If I can't do something on my own, I learn how to. If I can't, I drop it entirely. Independence out of necessity. I spent my school years reading through all the school textbooks teachers glanced over and reading technical manuals in the library to be a jack of all trades skill-wise.
Got in a lot of fights in school, from preschool (yes, preschool) all the way to uni. Shitty schools, shitty people. Assholes always thought they could take me on since I'm a big guy, and they want to prove themselves to their friends.
My preferred style for fighting is pure defensive. Disarming, grapples, joint locks, and throws to disable and exhaust them, and then just walking away when they are prone and weakened. I mean, from there, I could always stomp their face in during their helplessness, but sparing them on the ground always is enough of a lesson to not mess with me again.
But I'd always be willing to talk to anyone. You know, if you wanted to actually talk and not fight/exploit me. I'm really enthusiastic and offer my words to anyone that would care to listen. Otherwise, I prefer to stay quiet.
>now
Same, really. Gentle giant and a hermit that just wants to live a quiet life, without worries of people that try to break my heart or fight me. It's way more peaceful now, but I must keep my mind and body sharp and always hold my own.

is the disease symptom where you vomit out tons of cockroaches still in?

>>135815507
I highly suggest you make a ban appeal, from my position you tried to warn people as much as you could before attempting to bomb the queen. mrpain even claimed that you "gloated" in deadchat when all you said was "bye".
You probably enabled special menu not realizing what it does, did the same thing when it first came out.

>>135807784
>Saw it while browsing the catalog
>Quiet nerdy loner
>Quiet nerdy loner that prefers to solve sphess conflicts with lethals and gibbing them so there's one less fucking faggot shitting up the round until I run out of faggots. In-between bans from dindus crying to the admins that I touched their no-no place after they were griefing sec

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>>135815965
This>>135815965
This>>135815965
This>>135815965

As a fellow non-antag bomber, dumbasses don't listen. If you tried your best to warn them and they don't listen they can get fucked. You either missed the ahelps or had the special window open so that's an honest mistake. At worst I can't see anything more than a 3 day ban and a week sciban as a matter of principle just cause you killed people anyway

>>135815965
>>135815673

Okay, thanks for all the help you guys, you're the best

>>135816161

Okay, cool

Was my bomb that big?

>>135815507

The "Special" tab is where talking to admins occurs, on the top right portion of the client. Honestly, if you explain out why you did it and outline that you've learned it was the wrong course of action (even though it was pretty fucking funny), I would be surprised if your ban wasn't reduced to like a week tops. Especially if you don't sperg out like most ban appeals and start yelling about how the admins are metagrudging you or how they're power tripping or any of the usual garbage that gets thrown up onto the forums by angry neckbeards.

Then again I'm not 'min so take my gut feeling with a grain of salt.