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/evn/ - Break Chance Memento Edition 2015-12-20 02:48:33 Post No. 125931369
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/evn/ - Break Chance Memento Edition 2015-12-20 02:48:33 Post No. 125931369
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Discussion about the making or playing of Original English Language Visual Novels.
Do you have a question about a Japanese visual novel or a translation of it?
/vn/ is ready to answer it.
>Getting Started:
http://pastebin.com/7LsCvtq3
>Recommended Reading:
https://vndb.org/v/all?q=;fil=olang-en.tagspoil-0;o=d;s=rating
For Developers. Huge collection of guides on everything:
http://meganelover.com/post/122965940223/visual-novel-creation-masterlist
Ren'Py Download:
http://www.renpy.org/
Previous thread: >>125607915
Remember to BUMP THE FUCKING THREAD every three hours please.
Current Playthroughs: Break Chance Memento, Magical Otoge Ciel
>>125930850
Thread picture is dead eyed Natsume because you all need to suffer with me.
>>
>>125931369
It's the 17th of September and I'm hoping everyone's done using Natsume as their emotional punching bag.
Shuuki's taking a walk on his day off from school and he ends up at the bridge again. He thinking to himself about Masa's death being cleaned up so neatly that it's kind of
"Sad?"
Thishot as fuckmotherfucker finishes Shuuki's thoughts for him.
>>
>>125931870
>hot as fuck
If you say so.
>>
The real star of BCM is that gui. I really liked how they did the menu
>>
>>125931870
It's September 11th: They've gone back in time! After some blahblah. Glowy apparently knows Natsume!
We have 10-15 minutes before Masa dies. Glowy says Shuuki can't save him-- not yet anyway.
Captcha: HOOTERS signage. There are no hooters in this thread.
>>125932095
I will go ahead and admit I have some odd taste in men.
On this note, should I keep random "personal" comments to myself or is it amusing for the rest of you to read?
>>125932284
This is true. The whole GUI is gorgeous.
>>
>>125932095
I'm a dude and do not like dudes, but that's a good looking dude. Compared to like the elf faggot, the weird brown boy, the guy in the Liberace homo outfit, etc-- he's easily the best looking dude of the bunch. In a sea of fopish weirdo dandy fucbois, he stands out as a guy who might just be a cool gay dude.
>>
>>125932475
I'm squinting at the screen, mostly wondering when glowy outfits and time travel tech become "in" in the future.
Oh shit,Natsumeinvented the time travel tech. NICE.
>>
>>125932823
The rings of light mark how deeply he has put his fingers in various butt-holes, he is saving his thumb for the MC.
>>
>>125932475
Make as many comments as you want. Keep it entertaining.
>>
>>125932823
We get some exposition about mementos now, courtesy of Masa's shopping list, dated September 6.
... I forget what happened on Sept 6. Masa died on the 11th, I think? I'll be honest with y'all, I'm very bad at keeping up with time travel.
Fuck I'm gonna need a spreadsheet for this shit. Please feel free to correct me if I get my dates mixed up.
>>125933013
Don't get my hopes up, anon.
>>125933149
Will do!
>>
>trying to fix an old CG
>new one is looking worse
Brb killing self
>>
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>>125933013
Anon pls.
>>
>>125933287
I'm guessing that's the day the oldest brother made food so he had a shopping list to buy food.
>>
>>125933287
Masa's killer is some illegally time travelling motherfucker, so our going theory about it being Yuki is still viable for the moment.
So tl;dr, Shuuki has to be the one to help save Masaharu, who WASN'T supposed to be dead in Glowy's future-- "Not like that" as he put it, because Glowy and Natsume simply do not have the right mementos to save Masa themselves. They have that shopping list, and that's it, and that's the best they have which doesn't quite fit the parameters needed to save Masa.
Each memento can have a window of travellable time of an hour at the most, and this memento is just short of the time to be able to save Masa.
>>125933507
To get all the ducks in a row here, I think I've got it now:
Masa died on September 6, his grocery list is from the 6th which is how Glowy traveled back and pulled Shuuki away.
The funeral was on the 11th.
The present is the 17th.
>>
>>125933987
Shuuki thinks this looks like a watch. I wish my watch looked half that cool and glowy. Maybe I'd be able to see my keys to get in my damn house in the dark.
We learn that the time travelling machine thingee can only hold up to five mementos at a time. Basically we want to store things that are perishable immediately, but things like the grocery list can be saved in a safe place so we can remove them from the memory and add them back later.
If you try to travel without a memento, you're gonna get stuck in void hell forever. Okay.
Shuuki thinks this is complicated and I have to agree.
>>
>>125912752
>The writing in Roommates was fine, I just found the sim aspect really tedious. I guess sim games aren't for me
Winter Wolves' implementation of sim games is generally especially bad and doesn't have much to do with decent sim gameplay. You may still find life sims boring, but he's generally really awful at it.
Good life sims have interesting interactions between the stats and tradeoffs that provide multiple strategies for victory. You could boost Stat A, or you could boost stat B to get a bonus event which lets you boost Stat A _faster_ afterwards, or you could balance A and B until the special event where you get to buy items which unlock new stat-boost activities, etc, etc.
For the same reason that I despise VNs whose "choices" boil down to "pick the same character five times in a row to get a good end, do anything else and get a bad end", I despise life sims where the only way to succeed is "just do these two activities every week, forever". That's completely wasting the concept.
>>
>>125934437
Got any rec's on sims? Non-VN is fine. I wasn't a fan of LLTQ
>>
>>125934431
GLOWY IS NAMED KYOUSUKE! He hasn't actually introduced himself yet though.
Anyway, that's the interface for the time travel device.
>>
>>125934603
Tokimeki Girls Side 2
>>
>>125934694
Oh i played that too, doesn't that sort of do what you hate? You just click on two traits the boys want.
>>
>>125934437
I've always found the whole "chase two girls at once and you fail" concept to be really stupid. I prefer it to Key's choices where if you like order a different food item your life changes, because it at least makes some sense, but it's still pretty bad. I also think it undersells jealousy as a motive for characters to act. Some romances are spurred by the sense of immediacy that "not being chosen" provokes. It gets rid of the illusion that the girl/guy has all the time in the world to make a move and can force action. I'd like to see some routes where a love interest realizes that if they do not act, the MC is not going to choose them, and where they are actually afraid of that possibility.
I think most stat simulators are kind of deadening and degrade what attraction is all about. Getting the girl because you have STR 90 INT 40 and she likes that is hollow. However, when the stats are not really related to the girls, but the path you take in the story, I think it can be interesting. I still think the concept itself is pretty bad or flawed. Building stats is just a more convoluted way of making choices-- and at least choices can have interesting ideas behind them.
Question: If I made a linear story, would it benefit from choices that lead only to short bad ends (i.e. deaths)? Do those bad ends serve a purpose, or would they come across as choice merely for choice sake? My thoughts are that they could heighten the life/death nature of the situation, but they could also just come across as stupid.
>>
>>125934604
September 18 2012.
So first and foremost, Shuuki shoved a receipt in his pocket. I'm willing to bet that, due to the timeframe we're in, that that will be the memento he uses to save Masaharu.
My question is, will he go back even farther to save Fuyuka?
Kyousuke sent Shuuki a Friendly Reminder that he doesn't have a lot of time to save Masa. I'll be running through how the device works as we go, since info dumping is going to get tedious.
Shuuki feels like he has purpose again so we're gonna raid the bedroom for some mementos!!
See the notebook on the chair? I'm getting that.
>>
>>125935190
>My question is, will he go back even farther to save Fuyuka?
If he does he'll fuck everything up even harder and get a flashback about the mom's speech.
>>
>>125935190
So when the machine talks, it's Natsume's voice! I like this.
Current mementos are:
Chiaki's notebook
Natsume's bento box (that Shuuki never actually ate the food in. Bleh.)
Yukinari's yellow mechanical pencil.
We're going to stealth mode to the past, using Chiaki's notebook. Stealth mode, we can observe. Active mode is for interaction.
It's September 4th, 2012, at 9:12 AM.
>>125935518
Are you theorizing or did you play through the whole thing already?
>>
>>125935715
Theorizing.
>>
>>125935715
Natsume was staring at Shuuki. Whether this is coincidence or not, we'll see.
Bento Box Timeframe: Sept 14, 2012, 4-5AM, Meisei Dormitories.
(Apparently it didn't occur to Shuuki before now just how early Natsume gets up to make them lunches. Maybe that's why he's tired all the time.)
Here we are! September 14th.
>>
>>125935059
That wasn't me. I generally recommend looking at the old classics like Princess Maker 2 and True Love, I guess.
I don't speak enough moon to have gotten into Tokimeki first hand, although I think the guys'-side ones have slightly more involved stats, because you might want to build up extra stats for the festivals and little RPG battles as well as just grinding the skills your girl of choice likes? But you're also having to make more complex decisions about spending your time with people and managing your money and so on, so there's a lot going on.
>>
>>125936119
So Shuuki goes into Masa's dorm room and picks up a wristband of Masaharu's. He tries to input it into the machine but...
>>
>>125936291
>death by waterfowl
I wonder how badly you have to fuck up to let that happen.
>>
>>125936291
Yellow Pencil: August 29, 2012, 2:31PM-3:06PM, Library
Shuuki thought he got a whole hour. No, ding dong, you get up TO an hour with strong mementos. Come on. Listen to the nice piece of ass that was teaching you this shit.
The machine is reading his mind! We can change from active mode to stealth mode partway through the usage of a Memento. However, the game regards choosing Active Mode (by the player) as choosing Stealth and shifting to Active at the right moment.
Shuuki decides to fuck with things by talking to Yukinari in his street clothes, after his current self, in school uniform, leaves to take a phone call.
Shuuki what the fuck it's not time to ruin things yet. Great job screwing with the timeline. Things are going to be weird when Past!Shuuki returns, still in his school uniform, to the desk he was studying at with Yuki. Let's hope Past!Shuuki thinks as fast as Present!Shuuki.
Shuuki approaches Yuki about this and Yuki just takes the whole thing in stride. I guess Shuuki picked a good person to fuck with.
>>125936543
I promise if there's ever an option to use the wristband, I will.
>>
>>125936890
>Yuki just takes the whole thing in stride
As only a killer could.
>>
>>125937053
Good point.
>>
>>125931870
>that anime tier shading
>that blur to hide the lack of detail
>>
>>125936890
Shuuki, using his brain, remembers that all of his brother's shit got dumped in the dorm room after his death.
What was Masa doing right before he died? Buying the fucking pencil lead! What comes with things you buy? A RECEIPT.
Holy shit guys. We might already have the memento we need-- but this is too easy.
>>125937053
Agreed.
>>
>>125937193
You again. I think you're in the wrong general m8.
>>
>>125937253
We're in the past! As far as Masa knows, Shuuki forgot to bring Masa's backpack along. Good fucking job Shuuki.
Present!Shuuki also forgot HIS backpack. So now everything's all weird, but Masa's just rolling with it.
>>
>>125937552Please for the love of god, stop doing that exclamation point thing. Present Shuuki works just as well.
>>
>>125937552
Shuuki is now crying.
Shuuki just keeps fucking this up-- but wait, he activates his powers of tsuntsun (is this tsuntsun?) to deliver this smooth excuse for why he's crying.
Shuuki, you're a bit of a dumbass, but you are quick on your feet. Maybe we're not totally fucked.
This is quite a touching moment, to be honest. But the music just changed, so this is gonna be bad.
>>125937679
Is it really that annoying? Old habit from LJ days. Sorry about that.
>>
>>125937679
Why? What's wrong with the exclamation mark?
>>
>>125937843
I don't know why I hate it so much. I've had years to get used to it, but the disgust never fades.
>>125937857
Everything.
>>
>>125937843
So Shuuki is back in the present, and Masaharu is MAYBE alive in the present. Not sure yet. I have a feeling that things are gonna be screwy because now past!Shuuki is going to get to the store with the backpack and then run into Masaharu later and well I'm sure we can see how that'll go.
Either that or Masa dies a DIFFERENT way. After all, we haven't actually caught the killer yet.
No image this time.
>>
>>125937843
I am finding it hard to take that crying face seriously. Also, ignore this sperg >>125937679
>>
>>125935169
>Question: If I made a linear story, would it benefit from choices that lead only to short bad ends (i.e. deaths)? Do those bad ends serve a purpose, or would they come across as choice merely for choice sake? My thoughts are that they could heighten the life/death nature of the situation, but they could also just come across as stupid.
If it's a horror game and the choices (and deaths) are entertaining, I wouldn't mind a bunch of fake choices that lead to immediate bad ends.
>>
>>125938235
Masaharu lives! He's pissed.
He wants his dictionary back.
>>125938095
Okay so I tried spoiling the exclamation mark and my spoiler code got stripped. Whoops.
>>125938296
I mean I can do it either way, it's a little more automatic to use the exclamation point though.
Overall preference, /evn/?
>>
>>125938443
>Overall preference, /evn/?
I find the exclamation marks very slightly irking if there are a lot of them but I don't really care
>>
>>125938443
Dude, he's just being autistic. As long as you're not going to start using emoticons you're fine.
>>
>>125938672
Please respect my triggers.
>>
>>125938443
The exclamation mark is fine. I'm more irritated by the idiot whining about it than any abnormal punctuation.
>>
>>125935169
>Question: If I made a linear story, would it benefit from choices that lead only to short bad ends (i.e. deaths)? Do those bad ends serve a purpose, or would they come across as choice merely for choice sake? My thoughts are that they could heighten the life/death nature of the situation, but they could also just come across as stupid.
I think it can work. Personally, I think it works a little better when the dead end is a direct consequence of the choice but perhaps not immediate (eg. not something like "open the right door and you die") and ideally something reenforcing a thematic point maybe.
>>
>>125938443
So things are okay for the moment. Shuuki's memories of the past couple weeks are all fucked up though, due to his time travelling shit.
Masa's tutoring him in the library now because Shuuki's grades are fucked up too.
After some self reflection, Shuuki thanks Masaharu for the help.
As for the exclamation points, I'll try to keep them to a minimum, but I'll continue using them when talking about the past/present versions of characters. I honestly find it easier to create one "word" instead of having the adjective and the noun separate, if that makes any sense.
Or I could always use a hyphen, I guess. I just want things to be easy to follow for everyone.
>>
>>125939172
I hope somebody dies again soon.
>>
>>125939172
The important thing I'm learning here is Mr. Pissypants can be pretty damn cute. He is definitely tsundere.
"Stop being nice to me, Shuuki!" is p much the gist of this scene.
This scene is very sweet but I also want to get back to murders. I need to know if Yuki's the killer.
We have two hours to spend, friends!
As a reminder, we have four mementos right now:
Yukinari's pencil
Masaharu's receipt
Natsume's bento
Chiaki's notebook
Vote please! We resume in 20 minutes.
>>125939421
No one's dead but I hope this is a little exciting! Maybe we'll cause someone to die.
>>
>>125939746
Use the time machine now.
>>
wakey wakey eggs and bakey~
>>
/evn/ should do more LPs.
>>
>>125939746
I guess we're going with the time machine since there were no other votes!
But wait! We have a message. Kyousuke has sent me a congratulatory message(why don't you congratulate me with your cock?), and a warning not to let my guard down.
I appear to be missing a memento, probably the one I used to save Masaharu. He better not die again.
Okay so I kind of disregarded anon's choice (>>125939936) and explored a little first. We have a new memento!
Chiaki's notebook: Sept 4, 9:12-10:12AM, classroom
Bento Box Timeframe: Sept 14, 2012, 4-5AM, Meisei Dormitories.
Yellow Pencil: August 29, 2012, 2:31-3:06PM, Library
Masaharu's Test: Sept 19th, 9:45-10:20PM
Any preference, guys? Sorry for the back to back choices. I'll plan for this better in the future.
>>
>>125943068
Once my vn is finished, I'll show it to the thread and hope someone goes through it. I'm totally willing to brave the slings and arrows of the general just to add some liveliness and get feedback on things I did right/wrong.
Progress is that nearly all scripts are done, waiting for Artist yes/no so that the ending can be written. I may just write both cases to save time if he can't make the CG that I want for the ending.
Would it be improper to link it in the thread when it's done and ask for feedback? It is free and I wouldn't mind criticism (if anything, I need it).
>>
>>125943273
Bento box.
>>
>>125943380
Why would it be improper to give a link to a game that you finished? If anything it would be appreciated, you could get some good criticisms and keep the thread alive with discussion. But don't do a LP of your evn, that would be a bit weird, yeah.
>>
>>125943273
Nothing good has ever come from fucking time travelers.
>>
>>125943567
Yeah, I feel like that would be astro-turfing at best and wholly disingenuous at worst.
>>
>>125943903
>astroturfing
Huh. I never heard this word before. Learn somethin' new everyday. More intelligent sounding than "shilling" I suppose too.
>>
>>125943380
The issue that you'll face is that most of the anons here (aside from BCM anon) are lazy ass or selfish fuckers who only put in time and effort in their own vns, and critique things only if it takes less than 2 minutes tops. Obviously, you're welcome to try. Just warning you not to be disappointed if nobody LPs it.
>>
>>125943380
If you're game appeals to me, I'll LP it senpai.
>>
>>125943273
So we're doing the bento box. I'm going to save, so you know what? Let's go active mode.
Shuuki proceeds to startle the shit out of poor Natsume.
>>
>>125944334
LPing takes way more effort than I can muster and I'm not a good commentator. But I couldstreamsome.
>>
>>125944334
I think it's more that whenever someone LP's, not a lot of people join in. These threads are too dead.
>>
>>125944587
Shuuki discovers that cooking is a PAIN IN THE ASS and a lot of work. Natsume thinks it's theraputic.
This is very much a bonding/Shuuki feels bad scene. I think we're going to have a lot of these.
Pick a choice!
Also if I vanish, it's because I smashed my computer in a fit of captcha rage.
>>125944334
Honestly I'm pretty fucking lazy but I'm also pretty depressed and I WANT to play this game so playing it for an audience is motivational for me to play this thing in the first place.Holy run on sentence, Batman.
>>125944760
The lack of responses can be kind of disheartening, true, but having even one person reply is fun.
>>125944660
Do it anon do it!
>>
>>125944972
I have a feeling being nice suddenly will lead to bad things so pick the top option.
>>
>>125944972
Maybe I could help again.
>>
>>125944972
>>125945214
>>125945217
I'm gonna go eat a slice of pizza and see if we get a tie breaker. If it comes down to my choice, I'm not sure what I'll do because being nice will PROBABLY fuck things up, but I love Natsume and he deserves love and nice things...
>>
>>125944078
Thanks. I like astroturfing as a metaphor a lot.
>>125944334
Really good points and I like your uh... care and perspective.
>>125944461
I hope you do. Here's one script to see if you'd like it. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Vehf0S_ucxjl4IQLA1DCGk5gaoek3tQhCrJ8c91kkfA/edit?usp=sharing
This represents 1/10th of the game. My goal is to get things out there for critique.
>>
>>125945642
We both said the same thing though.
>>
>>125944760
I think one of the reasons there aren't enough responses (aside from there being only a couple of anons here) is that the people actually interested in BCM aren't participating because they haven't played and don't want to be spoilered yet.
>>
>>125945713
>Anonymous Nyan Cat
thanks google
>>125945832
>people actually interested in BCM
What, all two of them? That's not a knock at BCM.
>>
>>125945924
Like I said, this is a small place. I'd say 2 is big, relatively speaking.
>>
>>125945756
Jesus christ.
So as I've demonstrated a couple of times before, I'm kind of an idiot sometimes and can't read. Okay, onwards.
>>125944972
Natsume is okay with the help if Shuuki will give it. We run out of time and now we're back in the present.
We have an hour to kill! Do we stop for today, or use the time machine?
If we use the time machine again, here are your memento choices. Please pick a memento if you pick time machine, thanks!
Chiaki's notebook: Sept 4, 9:12-10:12AM, classroom
Bento Box Timeframe: Sept 14, 2012, 4-5AM, Meisei Dormitories.
Yellow Pencil: August 29, 2012, 2:31-3:06PM, Library
Masaharu's Test: Sept 19th, 9:45-10:20PM
Sorry, there wasn't really anything to screencap this time.
>>
>>125945832
>>125945924
Yeah I think its more that most people don't care for BCM at all. It's just like, me, the other guy who votes/comments on the LP too, and the guy doing the LP that are actually interested.
>>
>>125946123
Did we do the test yet? If not, that.
>>
>>125946123
Time machine. Yellow Pencil (aka the Killers pencil.)
>>
>>125946271
Why do people keep saying guys? I thought this place was mostly girls anyways.
>>
>>125945924
Any feedback even scorn and telling me to break my own hands before I commit any further crimes is welcome, Monsieur Nyancat and mr./ms. Leopard!
>>
To be honest, I'm only going along with the LP because it'd be impolite to ask the LPer to upload the archive file so I can look through it.
>>
>>125946448
Sorry, it's habit from other boards. Always assume male, never refer to self as female even if you really are to avoid a shitstorm.
>>
>>125946448
Guys is the plural for any group that includes mixed genders. In nearly all languages, a group becomes the masculine term when even one member is male!
Bow before the patriarchy, guys!
>>
>>125946657
Could start referring to everyone in the thread as gals. It would be funny at least.
>>
>>125946530
Sorry, I should amend that I appreciate the LP.
>>
>>125944972
I'm enjoying your LP, it's interesting to read.
>>
>>125946776
You're right, we should totally start doing that, you go girlfriend!
>>
What do people think of letting kickstarter backers vote on who the canon romance option will be?
For example, IDHAS let their backers vote on who Name's free version and canon romance option would be, and the backers picked Yoi by a landslide. People who want Faye's route can still get it in the commercial version of Fates though.
To me the "canon" route is whichever I liked the best, so I guess I'm just not a fan of being told who's right for the MC.
How they came about the decision was an interesting read though, so anyone curious can read update #60 and more recent to get an idea about it.
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/chief/rising-angels-fates-visual-novel/posts/1422567
>>
>>125947068
>voting on whose main boy
This would annoy me. I almost never like the main boy, and so I would always prefer their isn't a "main" one at all. Or else it just feels a bit unfair that one route is seen as getting more attention, writing, cg's, etc in comparison to the others.
>>
>>125946123
Let's see if I can accommodate both voters.
Yuki's pencil first, we're doing that as stealth.
Nothing murderous yet, but I'm watching you, Yuki.Yuki who got bored of putting his pencil back together and now has a broken pencil. Now how're you going to compete with Masa's test scores?
Oh! Oh Yuki's got a book off the shelf!
... It's titled Perfume.
>>
>>125947068
I think the audience tends to come to a Canon eventually so it's just pre-emptive.
>>
>>125947307
Perfume? Sounds pretty gay.
>>
>>125947307
>Yuki who got bored of putting his pencil back together and now has a broken pencil.
Symbolic of how he took apart Masa. We've got our killer all right.
>>
>>125947307
IT ATE MY SCREENCAP.
>>125946810
I'm happy to hear that!
>>
>>125947307
Perfume is a story about a killer that tries to capture the scents of people. It became a movie. The end scene has the murderer open a bottle of perfume at his execution and everyone descends into orgies while he walks away.
>>
>>125947534
Are you for real? You better not by lyin, I'm lookin it up now.
>>
>>125947491
The memento pencil was gifted to Shuuki in pieces, and as >>125947451 points out, so was Masa! Holy shit guys.
Other than us suspecting Yuki, that memento passed uneventfully.
We have an hour to kill, so we're going to do the test next, in stealth mode this time.
... What if Yuki became interested in time travel because of Shuuki fucking with him?
>>125947534
I googled it because I thought you were fucking with me but holy shit. This is too easy. I am sorry for doubting you, informative anon.
>>125947415
This had better be gay or I want my $15 back.Kyousuke route now please.
>>
>>125947534
And then he dumps the rest of the bottle onto himself in a dark alley and gets torn apart. Not in a metaphorical sense.
>>
>>125948035
I've got a hot new theory. He killed Masa in order to spur Natsume on to developing time travel.
>>
>>125947534
>>125948054
>Perfume: The Story of a Murderer
Well shit. So my guess now is that Yuki is pullin the strings, but the dudes gonna feel guilty an kill himself out of guilt. Callin it now.
>>
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>>125947068
Who did this BG work?
>>
>>125948035
Masaharu is pissed at his paper and doesn't know what's wrong with it. He then goes to bathe.
That's it that's the scene. The memento is tied to his feelings when he looked over it rather than when it was handed back to him.
So. Since I did that last memento stealth mode, we still have an hour left. Do we redo the test memento in active mode?
No screencap this time.
>>125948130
Oh jesus christ I'm getting mindfucked and we're not even that far in.
... Am I supposed to be spoiler tagging yet?
>>
>>125947961
Yup
>>125947961
Yeah, well I am a writer, see script at >>125945713 , I'd love for you to read it and give some impressions (please Nyan Cat and Leopard, say something!)
>>125948054
>>125948150
I think this is probably accurate. They are probably trying to make this parallel.
>>
>>125948361
Looks nice.
>>
>>125948150
There are trigger warnings on the store page for suicidal actions.
>>
>>125948361
Me, bitch.
>>
>>125948436
>Nyan Cat
It's not a whole lot so I really don't have much to say, but it seems alright
>>
>>125948383
Can you redo the pencil in active mode? I want to see what the killer has to say for himself, tsk tsk!
>>
>>125948535
Name? I love it and I'd love to keep you in mind in the future
>>
>>125948694
Thanks! It is a short story, so I don't want to spoil everything (because everything is a small amount) but if you found it alright, I'll work harder until you're happy or amazed by the next thing I show.
I think just saying it's alright, or just that you bothered to read it-- that really makes me happy. Thanks Nyan Cat.
>>
>>125948702
I can try? I'm not sure if it'll give us anything new since the last time this was done in active mode.
>>
>>125946776
Some of us are from /u/ where that IS the standard, onee-san.
>>
>>125948802
I want to break you into a million little pieces.
>>
>>125948924
I'll work harder until you only want to break me into a hundred thousand. Then harder until you only want to break me into a hundred.
I will work so hard that you will only want to break my left hand and collarbone!
>>
>>125948383
>>125948807
We're gonna go ahead and redo the pencil in active mode. I'm going to save first and if nothing eventful happens, we're doing the test in active.
This time Shuuki claims his phone call ended already. Yuki says Perfume looks interesting. Words of a killer, dammit. He's looking away when he's not blinking.
I was fucking kidding when I started running with the "Yuki is the killer" theory. How are we gonna fuck him now?
... Unless y'all are into death after sex or however that would go down...
>>125948924
Be more subtle, Yuki. Good lord.
>>
>>125949695
>Yuki is the yandere route
Please God, make it happen.
>>
>>125949695
Obviously, you fuck the murder and crazy out of him. The one way to avoid being killed is to fuck someone so hard that they no longer want to kill you, but instead, spread lube upon their bottom and beg for you to fuck them until they cannot walk straight or shit straight for days!
>>
>>125949695
Shuuki thinks the premise sounds weird. Yuki thinks it sounds INTERESTING. The copy they have is in English. It should be noted that Shuuki can't read English.
Yuki says he had a tutor but he's not an expert at English. He's bitter about this. What do we do??
>>125949801
BCM True Plot: Yuki didn't like the attention Shuuki gave his brothers, and the rest of the school for that matter, so he murdered Masa in hopes that Shuuki would come to him, horny, desperate and lonely?
>>125950107
I love you, anon. I need more smut like that to exist.
>>
>>125950107
This is a christian thread for young ladies, please use only PG rated language, thank you.
>>
>>125950386
I want to know more. Also,
>thinks in English
>speaks English
>but can't read English
Hmmm.
>>
>>125950386
You shouldn't get involved with killers, and that's exactly why we're going to. First option.
>>
>>125950386
I want to see what the writers think a romance with a murderer would look like.
>>
All of yall are so dumb, it's clear that it's future!shuuki who is the killer.
>>
>>125950386
Getting involved with the murderer it is! 3 votes is exciting to see!
Are politics why you're homicidal, Yuki? It's okay, I understand. Politics are frustrating!
>>125950540
Can't tell if you're serious, anon.
>>125950390
But how and where else do we express our filthy fantasies and desires, sensei?
>>
>>125950931
Shuuki suggests that Yuki would have a cushy life if he did as he was told, Yuki says he doesn't want a cushy life if he has to live in a cage.
Shuuki wants to learn about the book when Yuki's done with it. Our homicidal love interest agrees, and then suggests we get back to studying.
I think it's time to bail.
>>
>>125951104
Chapter 3 begins! It's still September 23 and we begin with Shuuki being chastised by Chiaki for being a slob for the past two months.
Let me know if I should upload the ch3 cover. I thought this silly textwall was more entertaining.
>>
>>125950931
Do you think I should write smut? I am only interested in the butts of women and girls and would only write a hard S protagonist, so I don't know if my writing would appeal to your predilections, which are probably boys with boys. But I have years of experience engaging in anal sex and activity with girls and could describe it in accurate detail! Only three of which ever effected some form of retaliation with their fingers or other apparatuses-- all succeeded to varying degrees and proportions.
Perhaps it is time for a buttstuff renaissance!
Also go for the murderer.
>>
>>125951413
Yes, please upload.
>>
>>125951446
Do it, but only if you prominently include the phrase "anal tyranny"
>>
>>125951637
Alright, now to find an anal artist, a man or woman who truly understands the eros of the butt! Wish me luck anons. God willing, I will find such a kindred deviant and we will write butt stuff, with the aim of alluring young maidens who are all to eager to lay their delicate derrieres before our dicks and/or digits!
>>
Who is the CG artist for The Royal Trap?
>>
>>125951501
Uploading your screencap real quick before I continue.
>>
>>125952174
That sure is a lot of ketchup.
>>
>>125951413
Shuuki is trying to weedle his way out of not cleaning but Chiaki knows the Amamiyas too well.
Basically
"I'll do it later."
"No you won't."
I love these two sassy asses.
WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED SHUUKI? Is it condoms? Are they magnum?
>>125951446
I think you should write smut. My predilections are literally "both parties enjoying the sexing." I like BL, but I like GL and het too. S/m is fine and good.
>Only three of which ever effected some form of retaliation with their fingers or other apparatuses-- all succeeded to varying degrees and proportions.
You lost me here, but I agree with the Buttstuff Renaissance.Buttfucking Gamejam.
>>
>>125952493
>WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED SHUUKI?
Adead body.
>>
>>125952493
Shuuki has just now noticed that the receipt is missing from his device! He can't find the physical receipt either. Uh oh. Furthering my suspicious of Yuki. He could've messed with it when Shuuki put the device away, and destroyed the receipt...
Dammit, Yuki.
Dawn of a new day!
>>125952659
That would be under /Yuki's/ bed, anon.
>>
>>125952764
So for one, the brothers comment that Shuuki's usually awake before them both (uh oh).
They let that go, Masa's nagging best boy about studying. Best boy is about to fall asleep standing up.
And then we have this, that I didn't think I could summarize well enough.
>>
>>125952089
The same as the CG artist for Date Warp, just a few years of practice later.
http://ofskysociety.deviantart.com/
>>
>>125953281
Afterwards, the brothers have a pretty normal schoolday. Chiaki's gone to visit his home after school. I think his grandmother is an asshole or something based on one of the brothers hoping she doesn't say anything to upset Chiaki.
Shuuki turned down a group date invitation to find Kyousuke in his bedroom.
Kyousuke is judging the contents of some magazine Shuuki has, and I'm going to assume it's lingerie. Shuuki thinks that Kyousuke's clothes are way weirder.
Kyousuke is unhappy with us dicking around in time. Dammit you guys.
>>
>>125954127
If it bothers him so much he should do it himself.
>>
This is kind of random but in BCM i wish the items would have went away when you click them in the backgrounds. Instead they just stay there. Something about it triggers my OCD
>>
>>125954127
Kyousuke makes a butterfly effect reference, Shuuki's like "wat."
Meanwhile, ow my head Kyousuke. I don't like brainbreaking pain.
Not sure how much longer I'll be playing tonight, guys.
>>125954514
I assume he leaves them, honestly. None of the mementos so far are things that he can't replace-- aside from the bento anyway, and I think that's gone from the floor?
>>
>>125954703
Okay gals, I'm off for the night. I'm exhausted.
Hopefully, I'll be able to play more later today/tomorrow.
I look forward to theorizing more about Yuki's murderous schemes soon! Thanks for reading along!
>>
>>125954127
why would you have to step on a butterfly?
>>
>>125938337
I think doing this is fine, but don't make every other choice an immediate dead end choice, because that gets predictable and annoying. I didn't really like the choice mechanics in sound of drop, because there were about 30 bad ends, and some of them got recycled, and about 90% of the choices led to these auto bad ends that were really irritating. It was nice they color coded the choices, so the choices all appeared in red when you knew picking wrong would kill you, but the sheer amount of this because tedious - I can't keep count of the amount of times I had to reload the game.
Also didn't help that the bad ends were really, really short, and felt like they'd been cobbled together in 2 minutes just to stall the reader and artificially create a sense of choice. In reality, there's no choice if most the choices boil down to 'choose the right thing to continue with the linear story or you will die'.
>>
>>125945713
Firstly, well done on getting something together. As feedback, the scene had two major problems. Firstly, you give way too much information away. Rather than making me wonder about who your characters are and what they're doing, you tell me straight away, removing all mystery. Things like the opening paragraph are actually really harmful at this stage of your story, because you're not leaving me to discover things organically, and as a consequence, there's no sense of mystery to your characters, so I'm left uninterested in who they are or what they're doing. Make me work for that information.
Secondly, your word economy needs work. "Dasha began pulling on the rope they had affixed to the top of the wall, she tested it to tension. It felt secure, or at least secure enough for her to climb without much worry.” This is way longer than it needs to be. It can become:
“Dasha dropped her full weight onto the grappling rope, and found that it held.”
The second takes one third the time to read, which makes it less of a chore. Try to cut down your sentences.
>>
>>125955376
Good night!
>>
Am I the only one here now?
>>
Where are the euro shit posters with all that allahu garbage...
>>
I really am alone in this thread. I guess I'll just...go to bed...
>>
>>125958415
I'm here.
>>
>>125958731HowCan you see into my eyes
>>
>>125959149
But I am already laying in bed . You are too late.
>>
>>125959467
Okay fine I'll just stay here all by myself. Whatever.
>>
>>125959467
Place for another one?
>>
>>125959643
Sorry familia, but once I'm laying in bed and listening to shit like this http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NqlYHBikTYM sleep is imminent.
>>
meet hot evn devs in your area
>>
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>>125960016
>>
>>125963749
I'll bump your bumper bby.
>>
>>125964736
What's your favorite EVN bby?
>>
>>125965568My own idealized vision of Cradle Dong.
>>
>>125965623
Mine's an idolized version of Sunrider and Sunrider Academy.
God help me they're never going to improve.
>>
>>125965568
It doesn't exist.
>>
>>125954514
Would have gone away.
>>
>>125965651
I just quit academy. Four months of grinding just so it can tell me to click on a girl to begin her route while still grinding the now obsolete girls for 6 more months. That is some bullshit.
Also, I knew this going in, but they tease best girl and yet don't give her a route. It's YMK all over again, only shittier and with constant reminders that she doesn't have a route.
>>
>>125931870
Gasp! Le evil dark haired love interest appears.
>>
>>125955962
Your first comment is really legitimate. It is telling rather than showing which is a flaw. However, it helps the audience get their bearings and I do not think it gives too much away. I think how I did it with Aldamir was much better-- the audience knows he is the wussy wizard type because of how much trouble he has climbing the wall. It's a much better way of doing things. I'll see what I can do.
Agreed on word economy. That sentence is too long for what it does and yours is much better. Thanks for the feedback.
>>
3 painters lp anon here.Labtop is currently shitting itself with overuse of cpu and memory, so it'll be postponed while I try to fix that.
Played a bit, up to the first choice. Apparently it's structured by days, common enough choice in vns. Will do a day a LP if it doesn't get too extensive, which seems unlikely.
>>
>>125971715
But everyone loves pointless grinding!
>>
>>125982182
I bet many people like pointy grinding too.
>>
>>125982841
Of course! If it isn't painful, why do it?
>>
legs
>>
butts?
>>
Who else here /writing the edgiest shit ever/?
>>
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humanized version of
>pic related
Just gonna get me some loli harem sloots and it's off to greenlight
>>
>>125988302
>>125991874
edgy enough?
>>
>>125948361
Tamiart?
>>
What happened to all the background artists posting? They all burn out and die?
>>
>>125988302
gen urobuchi checking in, hows it going you fucking weeaboos?
>>
>>125988302
I should be, but I'm really just resting
>>
>>125948361
You could just ask the developer?
>>
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>>125988302
I've actually been filing down the edge and addinghope
>>
>http://lemmasoft.renai.us/forums/viewtopic.php?f=43&t=36139
I think this wins for worst character names
>>
>>125998190
RWBY?
>>
>>125998190
Yeah, the names are awful, but it's so chuuni that it could be good!
>>
>>125998190
>genderfluid MC
Stopped reading.
>>
>>125998190
>Technically androgynous, but identifies as female.
Androgynous? Do they mean intersexed? Because androgynous isn't a gender or a sex.
>>
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>>125998190
>The blue of your eye, I despise it. If only it would give in like the other one, I wouldn't have to rip it out myself
>>
>>126000810
Well if they're some sort of magic elf creature, intersexed might not be technically right either.
I have sometimes entertained the idea of an RPG where the sexes were 'male', 'female', and 'elf'
>>
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>>126003084
I like where this is going.
>>
>>126003175
Would you be more or less aroused if they were looking to rape the horse instead of the girl?
>>
>>126003409
Both. At the same time.
>>
>>126003409
I would be equally aroused as I was thinking the horse would be forced to rape the girl by the bandits.
>>
How long until evn become a den of depravity like jvn?
>>
>>126006681
Not long, I hope.
>>
>>126006681
we're already depraved but we cant affrd atm art
>>
>>125971715
I turned it on 'don't give a fuck mode' after finishing the game once on 'slightly easy' difficulty.
Normal difficulty is a fuck storm.
>>
>>125988302
Not a vn, but I'm writing a story about a cyborg cripple being kidnapped for ransom by a disenfranchised party of criminals.
>>
>>126007128
>we're already depraved
I've yet to see pissing, gangrape, actual cumguzzling whores, or bestiality that isn't furfaggotry in an evn. I didn't even include more extreme fetishes.
>>
>>126009005
He did just say we can't afford the art for it.
>>
>>126009005
>>126009163
I can afford the art, but I have to buy a car.
>>
>>126009237
No you don't.
>>
>>126009426
Well, no I don't, but I suspect the person letting me use their car will eventually grow tired of me putting miles on it even if I do basically refuel it for them (including their usage of it).
Also my fetishes don't please anyone here.
>>
>>126009571
What are your fetishes?
>>
>>126009675
Clowns. Mind control. Age Regression. Mental Regression. ABDL with or without either of the prior two options. Domestication of humans. Human transformation to anthro (esp dogs, horses). Robots (and roboticization). Black women. Asian women. PAWG.
>>
>>126009949
I'm not sure if this is a joke or not given the ending of the list.
>>
>>126010132
I might have just started adding preferences at the end.
>>
What game are younotlooking forward to?
>>
>>126010356
Sunrider Liberation.
I know it ain't gonna be good, but part of me wants to believe that money will make them better at game design.
>>
>>126009949
>Clowns
Truly, this thread holds the most depraved person.
>>
>>126010317
Well, that said, mind control, age regression (of a sort) and robots are fairly popular among the "normies" of fetish porn. Transformation and diapers also have their own communities out there but they're hardcore autistic. Your audience is out there, and because high quality products are kind of slim, you could get a drove of support. Look at that gender bender garbage. Lots of people dumped money into it because it existed.
As for clowns, you're an absolute madman.
>>
>>126010848
Come on, dude, female clowns are qts.
Also, the major problem is that I can't draw and I'm not excessively good at writing fetishes.
>>126010792
Also male clowns are usually pretty buff.
>>
>>126011126
But clowns also do cocaine, anon.
>>
>>126011808
Cocaine and alcohol are winners' drugs, anon. Trust a clown on cocaine or alcohol.
>>
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>>126012153
>winners' drugs
An oxymoron if I ever heard one.
>>
>>126012841
>wasting money fighting drugs instead of making money selling drugs
This is one of the biggest problems our government is facing right now.
>>
>>126010848
I suspect my fetishes just aren't kinky enough for you. I dig futa, gender-bending, incest, dubcon, transforming people into magical creatures, trapXreverse-trap pairings, and vampire bites.
>>
>>126013271
What? Most of your shit's good.
>>
>>126013271
>tfw no cutie loli vampire sinking her fangs into a giant futa cock
>>
>>126013454
Just make one Tao
>>
>>126013271
Most of that is fairly popular. Also as long as the incest isn't mom/daughter aka zzzzzzzzzzz: the fetish it's all good.
>>
>>126013671
Is straight shota fine?
Because while I prefer lesbian incest, straight shota is incredibly arousing for some reason.
>>
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Did any of you actually do anything of worth today?
>>
>>126013809
2000 words of writing of my novel.
>>
>>126013798
Stop talking about it and make the game.
>>
>>126013809
I did a lot already but I'm not participating in the stupid convo above
>>
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>>126013968
Damn it nigga I'm writing a fucking book.
>>
>>126013809
4 hours tweaking with the last paragraph of the demo.
also
>tfw you will never have a wide audience for violent, bloody-brutal, gore, torture, rape-porn.
>tfw you can't talk about this fetish lightheartedly
>>
>>126016429
You have me, at least.
>>
>>126016429
I'll never successfully produce that ABDL VN, mostly because I have no real skill.
>>
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>tfw people will never do fanart of your game
>tfw people will never write fanfiction of your game
>tfw people will never make shitty amv's with lincoln park or papa roach playing over screenshot images from your game on a youtube video
>tfw people will never write long ass essays about how problematic your game is and why no one should ever play it
>tfw people will never rp as your characters
>tfw crazy people will never take your characters and make a tulpa/headmate based off of them
>tfw people will never cosplay as your characters
>tfw people will never message you saying how much they love your game and how thankful they are for you creating a game that they love so much
>tfw no one will ever waifu/husbando your characters
>tfw people will never get into autistic arguments over who is best boy/girl
>tfw
>>
>>126020758
Hey, don't be like that.
Sunrider got made. Anyone here has hope if they could make sunrider.
>>
>>126020758
>tfw people will never do fanart of your game
>tfw people will never write fanfiction of your game
>tfw people will never message you saying how much they love your game and how thankful they are for you creating a game that they love so much
>tfw no one will ever waifu/husbando your characters
I've gotten all of these and I'm sure I'm not the only one here who has.
>>
>>126022251
Me I'm just going to be happy if my regular novel gets picked up for printing.
>>
Take the VN you like least, and change one thing to make it passable or better?
Which VN, what do you change, and why?
>>
>>126022251
>bragging
>>
>11 days until 2016
What's gonna be yalls new years resolution?
>>
>>126022251
I've had all of these except the fanfic one.
I also had one over-eager fan try to tell me their whole life story and how my VN resonated with them, which I kind of appreciate, but it was a bit intense... Especially as they started to tell me how needy they were and how much they wanted my attention...
>>
>>126027404
Was it a female fan? I have a feeling it is.
>>
>>126027664
Yes it was a female fan.
They also told me some stuff about their fetishes which seemed a bit unnecessary. Like, I'm happy you like my writing, but I don't need to know what makes you 'moist'...
>>
>>126026462
finish a damn game
>>
>Tess
>Joe
>Mariah
I know you're here HRP.I chuckled.
>>
>>126032287
shut up HRP dev
>>
>>126032287
I dun geddit.
>>
>>126032610
because there ain't nothing to 'get'. it's just an HRP dev seeking attention.
>>
Did some outlining for what I would like to turn into a pseudohistorical epic done. I was hoping I might get some critique on what I have so far.
Still working on the actual civil war part, because I don't want it to be tedious and boring, as much as I personally love reading about the battles and tactics of the ancient and medieval world.
Names are currently placeholders. Yes, I am something of a Battletech fan.
http://pastebin.com/huWAme0V
>>
>>126032610
HRP dev here. Anon is probably talking about our new blog post. I could see the thread easily getting derailed right now, so I won't post it here. But it's out there.
>>
>>126034581
If it's an evn, how would the thread get derailed?
>>
I wonder how much i'll regret it if I buy Sakura Santa
>>
>>126036224
Sakura games are always uploaded within the week, so maybe a bit.
>>
>>126034306
Where the FUCK is the waifus?
>>
>>126036224
Depends. Do you like the art? Do you want to encourage them? Is santa bringing you boobies for Christmas?
>>
>>126036224
Might be worth it to see what their games look like with an actually edited script.
>>
>>126036783
I was going more for LOGH bromance though most of the characters are married
>>
>>126036224
Not as much as I'm going to regret backing Sunrider on Patreon.
>>
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>>126036783
>>
Sure is quiet on Sundays. Which is weird, since I know all you heathens aren't at church.
>>
>>126037594
>wasting time at church unless you're networking for your business
>>
>>126037846
And that's why you're going to Hell. Have fun, sodomite.
>>
>>126037594
The internet in general is, besides facebook.
>>
>>126037984
Ever read Matthew 7:1?
>>
>>126037846
> not going to church to do research for your saint fucking game
>>
>WC under "3rdParty" on mangagamers website
I've always known that word to have a slight negative connotation
>>
>>126039241
It just means it's not something MG translated or produced in-house.
>>
How do I make more dynamic cg's? I feel like whenever I make one, it always comes out boring.
>>
>>126039127
I just made shit up for sick fetish VN where it's about an devils raising a new fallen angel.
>>
>>126034581
>I could see the thread easily getting derailed right now, so I won't post it here.
Get the resident shitposter on the line please, he can do it for sure.
>>
>>126040337
Practice. foreshortening, perspective, and composition skills don't come easy. It's why most CG work could basically be the sprites but with another pose like sitting.
>>
>>126040708
>>126040708
What visual novel (doesn't have to be an evn) has the most interesting and dynamic cg's to you? Anyone else is free to answer too I suppose.
>>
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>>126041721Hotel Dusk :^)
>>
>>126041721
I couldn't list any specific one. A lot of eroge tend to have nice CG and the artist certainly doesn't get paid to draw boring portraits. Nitro+ tends to do some interesting stuff.
>(doesn't have to be an evn)
>implying it would be an evn
>>
> December 21st of 2015
> Almost January
> Still haven't encoded my paper for "Human Exploitation Project"
Anon might be right, this might never get off the ground.
>>
>>126042114
I thought that game was awful? Or are the memes wrong?
>>126043017
Only mentioned that because this is the evn general.
>>
>>126043406
What the hell are you talking about? There's no meme about Hotel Dusk being awful.
>>
>>126043406
> :^)
> : ^ )
>>
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>>126043017
>nitro+
>>
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why do people insist on putting so much sprite body on screen and then text as far away from the faces as possible?
>>
>>126043801
That story had an awful implementation of choices.
>>
>>126043837
Nightmare fuel.
>>
>>126043837
Because people haven't realized the reason JVN do it is voice acting and never will.
>>
>>126043907
How so? I always wondered why that game became so popular anyways.
>>
>>126043801
I hate huke's art so much.
>>
>>126044089
>I always wondered why that game became so popular anyways.
Maybe you could read it yourself.
>>
>>126044102
It's the anatomy. The guy just knows how to polish a turd and put loads of textures and effects over his shitty anatomy to try and mask it. If he actually knew how to do anatomy, his art would improve tenfold. I wonder how much he gets paid.
>>
>>126044413
He doesn't need to though. His style gets him solid work, so he's not going to change that.
>>
>>126044413
I know exactly why I hate his art. It's his style as a whole.
>>
Should I try putting a depth of field thing to my game? I think Uncle Mugen pulled it once.
>>
Who will be the savior that /evn/ needs?
>>
>>126045429
ML?
>>
>>126034306
I think the main issue is that you begin with a lot of tedium and boredom. For the first several scenes nothing much really seems to happen. You have three back-to-back scenes of exposition and the story is not focusing on the actions or personalities involved. We do not even get Amaris's motive or background until right before he kills the emperor. So he does a long expository speech on grievances and then kills the emperor for them. He's only introduced a few scenes earlier and only very briefly. So why would we really care?
The feeling I get from your outline is that this story is a lot of talking and very little action. It's too much too early. I think what would help would be figuring out the true starting place for your story-- it sounds like it doesn't really start until scene four or so-- and the civil war doesn't start until way later. I am willing to delay my gratification and I am willing to be patient-- but only to a point.
If you want to tell this story, it may be better to pick characters who are being more affected by the politics in play. The people making the decisions are often not as affected by their own decisions as the people they govern. Declaring war seldom puts the general in any immediate danger (he's timed his declaration from a position of relative safety). The soldiers who are going to die on the other hand, are directly effected.
So I think your choice of lens for the story is not going to be of much benefit to its entertainment value and it's going to become old guys talking to each other, the VN.
I do not mean to discourage you, I think this is a fine premise, I would encourage you to write out the history and story and then try to find the best people to tell it (who are often not those in positions of power).
>>
>>126044258
>implying I have time for that
>>
I'm going to write 100k in a week! Believe it!
>>
>>126046616
Challenge accepted, bro! I'll join you on this epic quest!
>>
>>126046087
Part of what I want to do is talk about different political systems (monarchy vs oligarchy vs republic) in a rather cynical way, since the main conflict is the civil war that results from people disagreeing over how to set things up and avoid this usurper scenario in the future
>>
>>126046616
1-2k a day is plenty if you keep at it, you'll have a long script in no time
>>
>>126045429
SakeVisual? I think Backstage Pass might be out soon.
>>
>>126046962
That's totally fine, but unless you are amazing at characterization, have incredible skill at writing dialog, have a very solid grasp of political systems/critique, I cannot imagine wanting to read it. Your technical skills need to be godlike. You need to be way better than me-- I could never do this and would not attempt it. I also was a political science major with a specialization in political theory and while I cannot say my writing is amazing, it is pretty solid.
And then it begs the question-- why use the visual novel medium for this story at all? The obvious use of the medium for your story would be to illustrate battle tactics and explain them in an interesting way-- but your story does not get to do that for a very long time, so you have sprites standing in a background talking while visuals are not being used. So the medium itself is doing what it does worst (lengthy "Plato/Aristotle/Etc" conversations) while little happens.
Here's an idea. You begin the story at the field of a battle. This establishes one of your characters as a military leader. You show off some of that knowledge you have with illustrations. The military leader is successful. He returns home after quashing whoever he was dealing with-- now we know him and his position in society. We're invested in that character and you gave us some action.
After that is a cooling down period where he has these philosophical discussion so we learn what he is fighting for or about. People can react differently to news of his success, some identifying him as a potential threat (setting up an antagonist relationship). The audience is going to be much more interested in what he has to say after he has performed a heroic feat.
>>
>>126047975
>You need to be way better than me-- I could never do this and would not attempt it.
Here's your cue to stop asking this guy for advice.
>>
>>126047967
That game has been in development for so long I no longer have any hype for it left.
>>
>>126047975
>poli-sci major
Hahaha, good joke
>>
>>126048514
It doesn't matter. All that matters is a game is good when it's released. Players forget about delays as long as it's good. If it's bad though, it's a whole 'nuther story.
>>
>>126048749
They're talking about their own feelings, not the entire playerbase.
>>
>>126048749
That is, if it ever gets released.
>>
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>>126048174
Yes, because when someone in the field tells you that it is a bad idea, it obviously means they have no clue what they are talking about. Great logic.
>>126048675
The best part of the joke is the punchline and having STEM majors report to me and perform trivial technical stuff on my projects. I do not know how anyone pretends STEM stuff is hard. I have a few hardware engineering related patents that I make royalties from (I never bothered to major in something that easy), so there's that. But keep talking hot-shot, I'm sure you're doing extremely well and that I could never compare to your greatness.
>>
>>126049739
Oh boy, here we go.
>>
>>126047975
The point isn't so much to be philosophical, in my mind, as to humanize these views -- especially the more elitist ones-- by embodying them in relatable, passionate, and sometimes shortsighted people who have much at stake in the outcome of this struggle.
>>
>>126049739
>What did you say about me, you little bitch?
>>
>>126049739
I too can make up offer letters to prove to anonymous nerds on an anime message board that I'm better than them.
>>
>>126049739
Looks like somebody's mad that they wasted all their money on a useless degree, lmao.
>>
>>126050068
What makes you think he's lying? He even censored the names and everything!
>>
>>126009005
>or bestiality
Working on it
>>
>>126043837
On that note, what would you guys say the ideal cut-off point is for a sprite? Hips? Knees? Thighs? Stomach?Shoulders?
>>
>>126050739
I think it depends on the height of the protag.
>>
>>126050739
I think it should be done differently for different scenes. I like how Muv Luv handled sprites in general. I also like sprites that change their distance/size for certain scenes.
>>
>>126051026
>Muv Luv
Opinion discarded.
>>
>>126051309
Muff luff baybee!!!
>>
>>126051309
>hating kamige
Opinion discarded.
>>
>>126050739
A little below the hips I think. Shoulders is only when a character is getting up close and personal with you.
>>
>>126052519
>kamige
Ha ha ha ha hHAHAHAHA! AHHAHAHAHAHa! Ha!
>>
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Hello, citizens of Lemmasoft. My name is Alonso Betancor. I am currently working on various projects. Due to the fact that I am obsessed with creation (and posses insomnia) I will accept many more
What I write:
Disturbing anything
Horror
Dark Scifi
Dark Fantasy
Modern Fantasy
Romance (of the sappy variety)
No nos:
Hentai
Fanfiction
Example of my work:
http://teaforthecynic.blogspot.com/2015 ... t.html?m=1
I can use Tyranobuilder, but I cant draw a pear (not even close to a human.)
>>
>>126052741
The fact you copied and pasted without a moment to do even the most basics of edits causes me to be leery. Welcome to 4chan.
>>
>>126052857
I think you're missing the joke.
>>
>>126052741
>>126052857
Also, since I am tired and grumpy, I shall also impart some writing advice for you and other writers.
> "Blah blah blah," he said.
You got the "he" not being capitalized, but you forget to replace the last period in those types of sentences with a comma. I remember another anon had the same issue when they posted their writing last thread.
>>
>>126052741
Enable HTTPS on your blogspot please.
>>
>>126053130
I've been up for 20+ hours. There is no joke, just pain and agony that I impart on all of you.
>>
>>126053132
... You should really check the writing sample all the way through to the end.
That is not my writing. I copied a post from Lemmasoft's forums with an example of some comically poor writing. Here are some gems from it, since you didn't give it a read:
> "After a second of shock, he got up and drew his sword from the book case. And a copy of an anciant tome unkown to anyone."
>He would have to end this creature in latin. "revertoutinfernusubijutusluciferindoloris"
> Her dress was lined with paintings of flowers, and was just tight enough to compliment her chest.
> Thats probaly why Edmond loved her. She complimented his overall respite for society very well.
> And then that one, special moment came. She got down to her knees, and poured her heart out. She spoke of love, and marriage. She asked him for his future. But Edmond has no time for that. He ran back to his apartment, and spent the rest of the night alone.
>It continued. "Please, return to your world." pleaded edmond. The cloth fell from the creatures body. " Hellen" he quietly sobbed to himself. The last thing he heard was: "revertoutinfernusubijutusluciferindoloris"
>>
>>126053132
>>126053228
Get some sleep you zombie. /evn/'s not going anywhere.
>>
>>126053681
Are you /pol/ shitposter-kun?
>>
>>126053459
What's wrong with the writing you quoted? It all looks mostly grammatically correct to me.
>>
>>126053459
desu, that's not really that bad? He's got some wonky commas and needs to vary sentence structure but that can be fixed.
>>
>>126054054
Here I feel you are elaborately trolling me, but I must rise to the provocation.
> "After a second of shock, he got up and drew his sword from the book case. And a copy of an anciant tome unkown to anyone."
1) Both ancient and unknown are spelled incorrectly.
2) A "copy" of a tome implies that more were made and that he does not have the actual tome itself.
>He would have to end this creature in latin. "revertoutinfernusubijutusluciferindoloris"
1) Latin needs to be capitalized.
2) What he puts in the quotes are not even Latin words, are not spaced correctly, and do not remotely resemble Latin.
> Her dress was lined with paintings of flowers, and was just tight enough to compliment her chest.
It's really unlikely that a dress has painted on flowers, particularly in the time period for this story.
> And then that one, special moment came. She got down to her knees, and poured her heart out. She spoke of love, and marriage. She asked him for his future. But Edmond has no time for that. He ran back to his apartment, and spent the rest of the night alone.
1) First sentence is just really bad.
2) She appears to be proposing which makes little sense.
3) There should not be a comma before "and poured her heart out."
4) There should not be a comma before "and marriage."
5) It should be "But Edmond had no time for that."
6) There should not be a comma before "and spent..."
>It continued. "Please, return to your world." pleaded edmond. The cloth fell from the creatures body. " Hellen" he quietly sobbed to himself. The last thing he heard was: "revertoutinfernusubijutusluciferindoloris"
1) Edmond is not capitalized.
2) Again the same non-existent "Latin".
>>
>>126054873
Idk man, it's really a lot of stuff editing can fix and he says he writes for free. It's not the dumbass who wants .10c per word after doing an AJTilley game or that one who wanted .25c a word after helping with the Queen At Arms demo.
>>
>>126055598
No decent editor is stupid enough to waste their time correcting writing that doesn't deserve it.
>>
>>126056554
That isn't true at all.
>>
>>126056554
Hey man, if it pays, it's done.
>>
>>126056554
What do you have against this man? Did he hurt you?
>>
>>126056554
Finally a person who sees it.
>>126056698
>>126056757
>>126057598
Holy fuck you guys are dumb. Read the fucking image. The guy is really bad. I have nothing against him, but if you think that quality is tolerable, you're fucked in the head.
>>
>>126058038
If you have a decent job that lets you freely pick your clients, congratulations.
>>
>>126058038
>I have nothing against him
Okaaay
>>
>>126058204
I don't think you understand the difference in pay between editing and writing.
Writing is about 3-10c a word. It depends on your value.
Editing is usually 1c or less.
The extent to which that work is bad is NOT EDITABLE. You cannot edit that to make it okay or tolerable or remotely close to good.
You would have to rewrite it. And be paid the rate of editing.
And I doubt that anyone who is good or competent at anything in the world tries to cobble together their life by freelance vn editing. Any minimum wage job would pay more per hour. Any other editing gig would pay more. There is no way the time investment for fixing that writing would be worth a reasonable amount offered.
Sure, if someone paid me 20c a word, I would do it. But they could just pay 5c to have it written by someone not stupid.
I pray that:
>>126054667
>>126054054
>>126057598
>>126056757
>>126056698
Are not writers.
>>
>>126058690
Jesus christ dude just stop, I'm getting secondhand embarrassment.
>>
>>126058874
Look, the guy has a point, the writing is a mess.
That said, if I'm paid enough, I can fix a mess, and sometimes there are situations where it's easier to start from shitty writing and edit than to write completely from scratch.
>>
>>126059412
The real problem with trying to fix a writing disaster is that in many cases they take the editing where you went above and beyond trying to turn their tortured language into something readable, for a fraction of the cost your time was actually worth, and then throw out all your edits and stick with the original because they don't understand why it was bad and they don't like how much you've changed it.
I'm not sure in those situations whether it's better if they do or don't credit you. Throwing out all your edits and listing you in the credits as an editor makes you look stupid too....
>>
>>126059412
At the end of the day he is massively asspained about some random offering free writing on LSF. This person didn't write how they were writing for 20 years or claim they're better than they are, or even asked for pay, they just... posted. Calm the fuck down is alls I'm sayin'.
>>
>>126058690
Chill...
>>
>>126058690
>>126058038
Hi 2012/3
>>
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>>126061914
>>126060319
>>126058874
>>126058204
>>126056757
>>126056698
Edit this into something good, artists!
>>
>>126058690
The entry level published writer at Tor books earns 2c a word. JK Rowling earned 25c a word on Harry Potter.
I'm not paying a writer half of JK Rowling's salary to write a VN.
>>
>>126062606
You're fucking trash and have no clue what you're talking about.
JK Rowling gets fucking royalties you dumb fuck. Holy shit. You are fucking retarded.
Do YOU REALLY FUCKING THINK JK ROWLING MADE ONLY 25C A WORD ON HARRY FUCKING POTTER.
SHE GETS 10% YOU DUMB FUCK. OF ALL GROSS SALES.
ARE YOU FROM INDIA? MALAYSIA? SOME COUNTRY FULL OF BROWN PEOPLE WHO CANNOT THINK? HOLY FUCK I AM MAD.
>>
>>126062727
Regardless of your imminent retardation induced aneurysm, 25c a word is unheard of in publication prior to Harry Potter. No writer only in publication gets just the word count however no writer before JK Rowling earned 25c a word.
You would have to be the most retarded person that has ever had the misfortune as breathing the same air as normal human beings to someone think because someone said JK Rowling earned 25c a word, that means that was all she earned.
The point is unless you're a well known author you are NOT making above 2c a word, fuck off your writing isn't that good.
>>
>>126062946
>unless you're a well known author you are NOT making above 2c a word
The guy you're replying to is a moron, but you just went full retarded here. 2c a word is not, in any way, a great rate for fiction, be it on short fiction or books.
Stop talking out of your ass and stick to facts, you're only taking credibility out of your own argument by exaggerating.
>>
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so much rage in this thread right now
What does /evn/ think of using BGs with lots of details and plenty to look at?
e.g. pic related.
>pros
looks beautiful
maximalism (for lack of a better term)
>cons
might detract attention from sprites
Thoughts?
>>
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>>126067679
If the sprites are the same OR better quality, go for it.
Otherwise, I'd say pic related is a really nice style that can lend itself to simpler sprites.
>>
>>126067679
Generally time consuming to make?
>>
>>126067679
There are several success conditions to those.
1. As anon said, sprites will have to be comparable.
2. The budget will have to be fat.
3. The imagery will have to look softer than the closest pile of junk in the picture. After all, the backgrounds equaled levels in Machinarium, which is not the case with VNs.
>>
/evn/ thoughts on this?
http://lemmasoft.renai.us/forums/viewtopic.php?f=13&t=36086
>>
>>126057598
I don't get why people want to defend this sample of writing so much, it's just... bad. There are lots and lots of issues with it, and editing something this poor would feel like a waste of time, since a lot of it would need to be almost completely rewritten.
>>
How do you guys feel about rape being involved in VNs?
I realized a VN I liked actually glosses over rape by deception since it's female on male.
>>
>>126073215
>How do you guys feel about rape being involved in VNs?
I'm fine with it, same as in movies. I don't like it and it makes me feel bad, but I'm not going to drop fiction because of it.
>I realized a VN I liked actually glosses over rape by deception since it's female on male.
That's realism for ya. Emotional, physical abuse and rape on males is not only okay/justifiable, it's funny too.
>>
>>126073489
I think rape is part of life, sadly, so it should be a part of fiction as long as it isn't handled badly.
>>
>>126073215
It's a hugely sensitive issue, so if you handle it badly, you will wind up looking like a total ass. Of course, if you do some real research and strive to make it believable, it can potentially be quite powerful. Unless you're sure you can do that, I wouldn't try it.
>>
>>126071209
While "interviews" with characters are pretty stupid, I care even less if it is a game that isn't even out.
>>
>>126075629
I don't plan to include it. I prefer killing, an issue which I can understand at least on a clinical level.
>>
>>126075723
The clinical apsect is the least interesting, though. I think the reactions people have are far better. I've sliced open enough mice to give you a (not so) pretty description of what you'll find, but that's boring compared to a girl I saw faint the first time she saw a still-breathing aneasthetised animal have its intestines pulled out. People's thoughts and emotions are the most interesting thing to read and write about.
>>
>>126075991
I am sorry, I stated things incorrectly.
I meant that I understand the psychology of killing, death, and what can drive people to kill.
I don't really understand rape besides the fact that it's usually a power issue rather than a sexual issue, and that there's a tremendous loss of control in being raped.
>>
>>126076189
Oh, I getcha. Out of curiosity, do you have personal experience in seeing yourself or someone else in that mental place of wanting to kill?
>>
>>126076470
With myself, no. I have seen a close friend at the point where it took three of us to hold him. He wasn't even screaming or anything as he went after the other guy, he was just a wild man. I think if he got loose, he would have turned the other guy inside out. He later expressed that he hated the other person, but he did not elaborate further.
The other person is still alive, so it must have passed.
>>
>>126076641
Sounds rough. Are you planning a murder mystery kind of story, then, or something else?
>>
MLanon here. I ran into one of the people in charge of the game week and we talked bit about investors. He mentioned that there are people interested in funding the game. ( last year a game got around 40,000usd this way, so you can imagine my reaction to the news). We also talked about crowdfunding, and he put me in contact with people who can do the paperwork in the US so if I decide to go this way, it will be KS rather than indiegogo.
If I get direct funding, I will most likely offer the planned crowdfunding rewards in a store instead.
Slightly less relevant to the game, he also said that the event is looking into giving all access passes to the GDC to the winners (me and other guy).
>>
>>126076870
Not currently. My current story is a surviving being kidnapped story.
>>
>>126077119
Ah, were you the anon from the other day who posted the snippet with the woman missing a foot?
>>
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First thing on day 1 is that today's going to be bright and "clement". I feel that's off, but I'll look it up in a bit to be certain. Nigel fixes his daughter Alicia Lucky Charms: Space Edition, and he hands her the prize out of the box, an astronaut toy labeled "Spaceman". Well after pic related, she finishes breakfast while he brings up going over to paint the neighbor's house. He jokes a bit that all she's going to do is play, then they begin to head over; Alicia being excited. So much she goes "Aw, yeah!" and Nigel chuckles a bit since she said it like some 80's movie character(How would you say something so innocuous like a movie character of any time period? Utterly baffling to me, especially since it's written so plainly like the rest of text, no particular emphasis. Meh, I'm rambling.).
>>
>>126073215
I enjoy it.
>>
>>126073215
I kind of wanted to write something with a male main character who's a rapist but who... doesn't really care about it very much, and never really reflects on it properly because he doesn't feel guilty about it. But then I feel like people would think it's just something I added to be 'edgy', and if it's a 1st person story but the 1st person narrator doesn't really care about it, it would make it look like I'm not giving a serious issue enough weight. I think it would be in-keeping with this character because they're meant to be a horrible person, but I'm very sure people wouldn't appreciate it.
>>
>>126077364
Well who else has prominence in the story? The contrast between another character that places a lot of importance on the issue the MC is rather cavalier on(and is part of the problem) could serve as part of good fleshing out for the both of them, especially if the other character is or is not aware of MC's crimes.
>>
>>126077204
Ah...no. Sounds interesting, though.
>>
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I kinda want to postpone this for a bit and not get in the way of interesting discussion. Good on you, MLanon. Looks like you're on your way to a brand! ;)
They head to the house and find that Terri and Arthur have already finished the prepping, so Nigel and the two of them paint. With only a fourth of the dining hall left, they break for a bit.
Terri's listening to some hot tunes by the fresh air.
Arthur's reading by his personal bag of paint tools.
And Alicia's playing with her dinosaur toys.(It's Paleontology or Astronomy, you can't have both dear.)
So who do we spend our break with?
>>
>>126077971
Feel free to postpone it indefinitely.
>>
>>126077971
Is the story about homosex or male pedo rape?
Because this looks awkward...
>>
>>126077583
The main character's family, who are pretty disgusted with him, and a love interest character... But the love interest character is supposed to be deeply unpleasant as well. I envisioned it as a story mostly about horrible people doing horrible things and not really caring about all the people they hurt, and not getting punished for it. I'm not sure if I'll actually write this or not though, since I have a lot of other projects going on, and this is just a vague idea.
I also had another project which I've actually written, which is mostly finished, which has some very dubious sex scenes in it, but explaining why it's dubious would give away a really big plot twist.
>>
>>126077778
>>126077204
My idea hasn't been posted here yet, IIRC, but it's basically about a paraplegic cybernetics experiment being kidnapped for ransom because her father's experiments in body modification could be really useful to a fringe element on the station.
>>
>>126078578
It's not like we know what game is yours. What's the twist?
>>
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>>126078115Ouch.
>>126078175
Apparently he's opening/running his own painting business while trying to find a tenant to rent a room to. Looks like slice-of-life with drama here and there based on that premise and a "dlc" side-story(?). There's presumably homosex in it if you choose, since the kilt-wearing guy is the male love interest. The only one pretty much.
>>
Any homo english VN that actually has a happy ending?
>>
>>126078864
It's never too late for a bad ending.
>>
>>126078864
There are currently no English BL VNs set in massage parlors, sorry to say.
>>
>>126078864
Coming out on top ends on a happy note if you don't fuck up.
>>
>>126078705
well the game isn't even published and i don't know when it will be since the content of it troubled my regular artist too much so they didn't want to work on it.
the twist is pretty strange, i'm not sure how i can summarize except by saying there's a lot more incest in the story than the reader or the main character were led to believe - which relates to the fact the love interest spends the whole story deliberately misleading and lying to the main character about who she actually is.
>>
>>126078864
Male or female?
>>
>>126079187
So "they're related in a different way than originally assumed" basically.
>>
BAD END
>>
>>126084591
Try again?
>>
>>126078864
Coming Out On Top has a bunch of happy endings. Even the non-relationship endings are pretty cheerful.
>>
You start a VN turned into a woman, and lesbian daemons are trying to give you their futa dicks.
What do?
>>
All this talk about writing has got me nervous. Can anybody look over this and tell what they think of the writing?How bad it it? Awful? Average?
>>
>>126090025
Line 2: other's
(Also, the narrator's a faggot for not just saying that they're arguing or screaming at each other and saving the words)
>>
>>126077114
That's pretty cool!
>>
>>126089518
enjoy it?
but why can't I just be a woman running through futa demon wonderland to begin with?
>>
>>126090025
You're writing a scene you cannot execute. You're not bad, this scene is difficult to write well. Currently it is really weak because of constant question strings and omission of detail rather than provision of it.
It's fine for you to have a character that internally censors profanity. But the whole scene, despite a hundred question marks, does not leave me with any interesting questions. Too little information.
Your style and diction show promise, work on scene construction.
>>
>>126090025
I'm not a writer, so I can only give feedback as a reader: something about the bit with the arguing blokes really bored me, I was tempted to drop the sample there and then because of it. When I got to "Of course, the last time..." my attention was revived a bit. Then it's up and down. I think I'd also have liked it better if it had been formatted in any way, there are too many blocks of text. Bits like:
How could I have known? The complete look of dejeciton and anger still burned brightly in my mind. She truly despised me.
I shook my head.
Now wasn't the time for this. I came out here...
I don't know, it just looks better and easier to digest like that, to me. I'd have done similar stuff in the rest of the sample, too.
>>
first cg sketch received! i think it's adorable, i hope players appreciate what I've done on this game... now if only i could come up with a cute GUI
>>
So are monster dating games a thing now?
>The Duenkhy
>Monsters on Tindr game
>Charming Monsters
>I Am Not a Monster!
I think there's some gay orc game out there too, if that counts. Interestingly I think the majority are BL or Bara.
>>
>>126090890
Because becoming a woman makes it weird.
>>
>>126091113
>I Am Not a Monster!
About that. Please don't make stupid Japanese-style portmanteau nicknames for your games. inoamon sounds fucking retarded.
>>
>>126091113
There was also the campaign for Fantastic boyfriends. I think it's a weirdly specific trend, but in at least one case one was inspired by another (iirc ML said she began working on hers after playing The Duenkhy.)
>>
>>126092060
Fantastic Boyfriends was less monster dating and more fantasy setting with obligatory non human LI.
>>
>>126091113
Monsters are code for gayness, it's been discussed before.
Have you tried not being a gay orc?
>>
>>126090307
Thanks.
>>126090909
>censors profanity
No, it's the name of a different type of human with dangerously heightened abilities. I just can't think of a good name for them yet, so I just left it as a blank in the rough draft until I can think of a good term.
Also, you're right. I was trying to keep it vague to keep people interested but I obviously must've went over board.
>>126090986
So more spaced out, and cut some filler content. Will do.
>>
>>126092494
Isn't there a demo out for that? Has anybody tried it?
>>
>>126092627
>playing Diversity: Orc Edition
>>
>>126092627
I was excited for it but besides having a terrible font, this >>126092715
>>
>>126092494
Giving monsters the problems of gay people will never not sound dumb to me because most monsters can murder they way out stuff.
>>
I'm too much of a pussy to show any of the stuff I've worked on, because after multiple instances of "I'm going to point out this little thing that is wrong with this but offer not a single bit of positive reinforcement" my ego feels destroyed.
How do you guys deal with this?
I'm probably just being too much of a insecured wimp and should man the fuck up but hey.
>>
>>126093108
So can gay people, technically.
>>
>>126093206
Post your things in both a ripdown and a cuddlebox, average them out.
>>
>>126093206
You man up and stop being such an "insecured" wimp.
>>
>>126093206
Post them in multiple places, and try to pick the best criticism.
>>
>>126093301
It can be awkward making vampires = gay people because gays do not actually need to suck the blood of your children to survive.
>>
>>126093206
I'm not sure what you want me to say as you already found the answer. It's not about you, it is about your work. You don't get better if you don't realize that you are bad. Accept it, improve, maintain discipline, and move on.
>>
>>126093206
If you don't hear negative things, how else will you know what's wrong with your art/writing?
>>
>>126093413
Spelling is hard, I'm an artist not a writer.
>>126093332
What places would you consider a ripdown or a cuddlebox?
>>
>>126093490
Are you sure? Have you ever tailed one to see what they do in the dark?
>>
>>126093581
I'm all for constructive feedback, but it's nice to hear something positive once in a while.
>>
>>126092595
I want to emphasize that you are not bad. I think people do not provide enough positive reinforcement. Your style shows promise.
>>126093206
Not showing is fine, but instead I recommend seeking two places to post your work. A hug box that will praise anything and a deviant horde of malcontents that will only offer criticism. This way you get diverse opinions on your work. Keep in mind that 4chan is not your target audience, most of the time.
>>
>>126093206
There is occasional good advice here, as well as some absolutely terrible advice that makes me wonder if people are just trying to sabotage each other's games or are barely functioning retards. I think you are better off finding a few friends or other devs you trust to give you an honest opinion.
>>
>>126093636
When I try to follow gay people around in the dark, the cops get called
>>
>>126093206
Because the alternative is going ahead with a terrible products. Some first drafts posted here are shit.
>>
>>126094308
But if you go ahead with a terrible product and no self-reflection, you can be rich like AJ Tilley!
>>
>>126094150
The same cops that just happen to be featured prominently in gay porn fantasies. Open your eyes. The evidence is all around you.
>>
>>126036224
I'm waiting on Sakura Dungeon to see if their vns get any better, since it's supposed to be the first title in their "new direction". It was also announced some months ago, so it appears that more effort has gone into it than their other titles.
>>
>>126091113
Whatever happened to I'm Not A Monster? It's nice to have these options I guess, but it's really the only monster game I'm actually interested in.
>>
>>126093874
Where do I find friends and other devs to make friends with? How do I make online friends?
>>
>>126095309
The dev decided to work on a lesbian game instead.
>>
>>126095432
You follow them around in the dark.
>>
>>126095515
But only if they are gay. And/or vampires.
>>
>>126093741
Oh, thanks. I was just worried about people opening up my game, seeing the writing, and immediately "x"ing out in annoyance.
>>
>>126095465
Oh, I thought that was just a jam. Here's hoping they don't abandon the gay one.
>>
File: NAME AND SHAME.png (16KB, 1298x128px) Image search:
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Threadly reminder to NAME AND SHAME (con)artists.
>>
>>126039241
It's mostly the same titles under their "English Original" section.
>>
>>126095580
>>126095515
I am looking for dev friends, not to sexually assault someone.
>>
>>126095961
There's a difference? Suddenly this pile of restraining orders makes more sense.
>>
>10 days until 2016
>>
>>126095961
I totally believe you.
>>
Is it worth it to get your game on Steam?
>>
>>126095961
>he doesn't want to touch his dev friends
Come on, it's not like we're the ones to judge here.
>>
>>126097056
You'll definitely get more people playing it and make more money that way. However, there are more casual players who will give you negative reviews over stupid reasons.
>>
>>126097056
You'll at least get pity purchases during sales, but I don't know if Steam charges you a rate to get on there (a flat rate, that is) in addition to their cut per sale.
>>
>>126097758
That's what I was thinking. I was seeing so many negative reviews over the fact that it's a visual novel. Why play a visual novel and then complain about it being a visual novel?
>>
>>126097903
On the bright side, a lot of people shill for their favorite game and make sure to get their friends to upboat.
>>
>>126097805
Only the greenlight fee, if you need to pay that. They do take a cut.
>>126097903
>Why play a visual novel and then complain about it being a visual novel?
Since you have to tick several default categories and VN isn't one of them, just a tag, most games are listed as Adventure, Indie, or Simulation when they first come out. Some purchasers don't look very closely, or don't know what a VN is, and don't realise what they're buying.
Other times people get games in a bundle. Bundle sales boost your ownership count but may do a lot of damage to your review score. People who've paid good money for your game are more likely to convince themselves that it's a good game in order to support their own buying decision. People who paid a buck and got seven games they'd never heard of are much more likely to play for five minutes and thumbs-down "this is shit"
>>
>>126097903
Idk I left a neg comment on sc2vn but all I did was talk about my hemmheroids in it
>>
>>126097056
Worth it how? It's certainly a sound financial investment if you're trying to sell a game. You have easy access to a market that buys games and even if your game is the worst crap imaginable you'll sell a couple hundred copies you wouldn't have otherwise.
If your game is free, i suppose it depends on what you think you're going to gain from it. More people will play it, obviously. Some will be annoying whiners.
>>
>>126097805
$100 to enter Greenlight, around 30% from sales.
>>
>>126098997
> 30%
> 20% or so if you get a publisher
damn.
>>
>>126099439
Yeah...
>>
>>126099439
so don't get a publisher
you don't need one
unless they are offering you upfront money you gain nothing
>>
>>126099439
If they're not going to fund the project or back you significantly to get funding, you don't need a publisher.
>>
>>126100139
>>126099439
Doesn't the publisher take a cut, though?
>>
>>126100139
>you gain nothing
I think that's only true in the case of bad publishers, which incidentally happens to be the only one currently available for EVN.
>>
>>126100516
I think you misinterpreted >>126099439 - that post is saying that steam takes a cut and then the publisher takes a cut, and then you and your team get to split up whatever's left after that point.
>>
>>126100604
If all the 'publisher' is offering is putting you on Steam, you gain nothing because you can do that your own self. Sure, Sekai Project might not retweet your announcement when your game launches if they're not publishing you, but plenty of other people and devs will.
There are things they could offer you. They could offer you some upfront funds, or contact with a better artist, or a port to console if they actually knew how to do that, or a sales point for your filthy fetish porn game that can't go on Steam, or many other things, but be sure you're getting something you can't get yourself.
Real publishers pay advances.
>>
>>126100785
Oh. Sorry, I thought (from what I was reading in that post) Steam gave games with good publishers preferential rates due to increased likelihood of more income overall.
My mistake.
>>
>>126100990
If you want an advance, you might as well write a novel. Even if your book doesn't sell, your ass gets paid.
Hell, if you get lucky you might even make more than just your advance.
>>
>>126101196
Video game publishers pay advances too. Of course, just like most book publishers, the advance is usually all you'll ever get paid, but at least it comes in a reliable lump.
>>
>>126100990
Have you released games before?
>>
Sounds like we all should move to mexico, then.
>>
I've made so many mistakes that I don't even know how I got this far along
>>
>>126102565
This is a trick. He's trying to sell you as sex slaves to the cartels to finance his VN.
>>
How far roughly am I through MLA? I've just gotten tothe coup d'etat.
>>
>>126101756
Yes.
>>
>>126102838
MLA?
>>
Quantum suicide is going for a re-launch of the campaign
>>
>>126103084
Muv Luv Alternative
>>
>>126102838
Wrong thread, anon.
>>
>>126101196
>If you want an advance, you might as well write a novel.
lol
You're so deep into your Stockholm syndrome that you think publishers aren't supposed to do for you what they're supposed to be doing.
>>
>>126103152
Hoo boy, can't wait to see it fail for a second time!
>>
>>126103160
Well off I fuck.
>>
>>126102838
You're not through MLA until you get to APA>
>>
>>126103249
Maybe they'll drastically reduce the goal and have a more limited scope? Or reduce the goal and have the same scope, which will cause many an eyebrow raise.
>>
SOMEBODY TALK ABOUT THEIR GAME! POST PROGRESS!
>>
>>126103598
I think they need to make a new demo. I though it was fine but two people I know complained about it being shitty.
And yeah the scope is insane considering these are nodevs.
>>
>>126103768
I'm the writer and my ex is doing the art. We're on good terms, but it is kind of an interesting dynamic. Our music guy does not know about any of that and I think it's for the best. Hoping for a March release, all art is spec'd. My writing should finish by early Feb at 20k per week unedited.
>>
If I've never made a game before, should I make my first game free?
>>
>>126104402
>20k per week
How do you do it?
>>
>>126103768
I'm stuck between two very different endings with two very different feels and I can't decide which one I want to continue from.
>>
>>126104532
I have a minimum of 2k per day. I do not stop until I get at least that. This means some days are rough and I end up working more hours than I'd like.
In rare bursts where everything just clicks I get around 4k to 6k in a very short amount of time. I'd say maybe 2 to 3 hours. Things just flow and it's easy.
So those bursts combined with the minimum keep my writing moving forward.
>>
>>126104532
Technically, he's only working about triple pace what most people can do at sustainable rate.
>>126104716
YOu're doing a sequel?
>>
>>126104972
It's technically the... 5th or 6th depending on how you count remakes.
>>
>>126105265
I'd say just flip a coin and try to write from one of them, and if that work turns out to be bollocks just try to write from the other.
My experience with writing is that the more you write, the higher the odds you'll pull something good enough to read out.
>>
When is your game(s) coming out?
I'll have one out in the start of march and then another in july next year. I'm excited.
>>
>>126106257
Probably December/November next year. Which is a nice coincidence, because the game takes place during the winter too.
>>
>>126106257
February or March with any luck
>>
>>126104404
There's no solitary answer to that.
However, if you have never completed any sort of project solely on your own then yes, for goodness sake, don't think that you know how to run a business and promise an AWESUM full-length commercial game which will fall into smoking ruins very quickly.
What role do you intend to be playing in the creation of your game? Do you know how to do that, or are you winging it? Do you have any funding? Do you have any coworkers lined up? Do any of THEM know what they're doing?
You may find it helpful to work on a short free project which you do not intend to use to promote your later works, just so you know how the whole bloody system operates.
>>
So any sales numbers on BCM?
>>
>>126108131
It's not on steam yet so we can't steam spy it
>>
>>126108131
how likely is it that someone here would have secret inside information that hadn't been posted on a twitter/tumblr you could look at for yourself?
>>
>>126108627
From their twitters, it's doing "OK". Not as great as they would've expected it.
>>
>>126108627
and even if it were, calling that actual sales numbers, particularly with less than a week's data to average....
>>
>>126104404
I would say 'yes'.
>>
>>126108835
I'm a bit surprised they had expectations of it since most of their games are freeware
>>126108870
At least its a conversation topic? ;_;
>>
>1 day until Christmas
>>
>>126109246
Well, most of their games are a lot shorter. Break chance memento clocks in at about 170k words.
>>
>>126108835
Well, maybe they shouldn't have spent weeks talking about how subpar it is.
>>
>>126109821
True. But I think it's mostly the art teebeeaych. If the art was like, say Spirit Parade, it would be a lot more popular.
>>
>>126109821
Are you still mad about this? Not every dev wants to have their head up their ass about their games like you.
Also I still bought BCM.
>>
>>126110178
You don't have to have your head up your ass to not shit talk your own game your selling for 20 dollarydoos.
>>
>>126110071
> Spirit parade
Speaking of, the writing in that is terrible.
>>126110178
> our game is bad but please spend 20 bucks on it
>>
>>126110410
Where did they talk shit about it? Literally just the artist saying she's got old art in the game and it would take her forever to re-do it? Big deal.
>>
>>126110410
For the umpteenth time, looking back and acknowledging some things you would have done differently if you could is not "talking shit"
>>
>>126110543
I remember playing it and not really noticing the writing. Voice acting was a lot more annoying.
>>
>>126110717
You do that after you release the game, doing it beforehand is literally saying >>126110543
>>
>>126110717
It is to that guy, who thinks talking like some larger than life corporate douchebag when you're a young indie dev making anime games isn't off-putting
>>
>>126110717
"I feel bad selling this" =/= "We could have done things differently"
>>
>>126110746
My issue was with the mc, she's annoying as fuck and her complaining about silly things like "oh no I can walk again" is awful.
>>
>>126111059
How did you even come to that conclusion?
>>
>>126111059
There are plenty of options
> sell it for cheaper
> don't give personal opinions beforehand
> say it's not your best work because X, but still good for what it is
>>
>>126111232
Read the last thread.
>>
>>126111556
Nobody said that there, either.
>>
>>126109246
They'd been building it up forever, it's supposed to be epic, BL is rare, they should be expecting at least some sales out of it.
But then, I have no idea what their sales are or what their expectations were, so maybe it's doing just fine.
>>
Do you think love can bloom for a VN protagonist whose time is very limited?
>>
>>126112134
Isn't that like an entire genre of JVN?
>>
>>126112202
>"I found out I have an incurable disease so I'm gong to see how many girls I can rape before I die!"
>>
>>126112290
I thought someone here was already writing that one...
>>
>>126112290
Protag with AIDS when?
>>
>>126112290
https://vndb.org/v5484
Bet you thought you were joking.
>>
>>126112387
I know it's been done in Japanese (probably more than once, though not as common as 'time stop rape'), I don't know if anyone's doing it here. It would be kind of funnier to see someone do it as a sympathy-card game rather than an outright rape game though.
"I'm going to die, so I can't waste any more time being shy or ashamed. I'm going to guilt-trip as many people as possible into sleeping with me!" If the simple "I'm dying" isn't enough, try even more outrageous lies!
>>
>>126112290
>>126112810
Here's the list for "Dying Protagonist".
https://vndb.org/g280
>>
>>126113001
>"I'm dying, so I want to spend all my remaining time with my daughters, but my daughters hate me, so I've decided to adopt some new daughters and spend time with them!"
Makes even less sense than the rapefest.
>>
Can i have an encouraging comment?
>>
>>126113485
Choke on a dick.
>>
>>126113485
ganbatte, oneesama!
>>
>>126113485
You can do it! I believe in you!
>>
>>126113379
Trying to win back his actual daughters love would be too cliche. Also, it's also a rapefest.
>>
>>126113485
You go girl!
>>
>>126114260
I guess it's easier to adopt a bunch of girls hoping to share in your wealth when you kick it than to marry a bunch of them.
>>
>>126113485
Give your life for the rodina, comrade, death before retreat.
>>
>>126090025
when i see __ in text it amuses me because i always write ___ as a placeholder if i haven't thought of a character name yet, or if there's a word i want to use that i can't remember...
I think this sounds good! If you want it to have more impact, I would rephrase 'still very clearly' to 'I could clearly remember' or 'I could still remember', you don't need all these words. I think you use 'still' too many times, and there are too many adverbs - clearly/truly/brightly, etc. Using lots of adverbs can really slow down the pace of a story, and can make it feel too bogged down in detail (I also do this a lot when I write oops).
'Would've never' could be 'would never', 'really wouldn't' might be better as just 'wouldn't', and you could rephrase the two sentences about the Empire State building so they're compacted into one sentence.
I like it, I think it just needs a bit of streamlining. I think it's effective, and I wouldn't call it bad by any stretch.
>>
If any MG staff is here, are you guys going to have another licensing survey in 2016?
The results from last year's were interesting and I'm curious if anything's changed.
>>
>>126114793
My placeholder is usually --some placeholder name-- with (LOOK UP A NAME/LOOK UP NAMES FROM THIS CULTURE/ETC) in bold next to it.
>>
>all these plebians unaware that my masterpiece will completely outshine their provincial little evns
Oh ho ho ho ho
>>
>>126115038
We've actually got a couple things planned this time around, the first of which is starting on Wednesday.
>>
>>126116898
Funny thing is, I accidentally posted this here instead of in the /jp/ thread in my other tab. Well, thanks for answering regardless.
>>
>>126115198
i usually use __ but sometimes i write notes next to it in bold like LOOK THIS UP LATER or LOL IDK GOOGLE IT
i think i was writing one story and i got to a scene i didn't want to write so i just wrote LALALA DO THIS LATER and moved on to the next scene haha...
i get paranoid i'll forget to remove these notes and leave them in during final builds because i'm an idiot and it's the kind of thing i'd do
>>
>>126116756
Enjoying art for art's sake is as fun to me as creating, you know.
>>126117251
I don't like using underscores or underlines because they feel weird to me. But then again I have bad eyes.
>>
>one of my teammates pushed me to get work done faster
>said teammate is now taking forever on his own tasks for a month now, causing me to need to nag him just to see what's up
This shit pisses me off.
>>
>>126093206
I can only offer my experience as an artist: I generally hang around a community where people mostly list what's wrong with your picture and sometimes tell you to keep going or something. Personally, I'm fine with that.
Having given feedback myself, I know sometimes I'm short on time and just think of pointing out the things to fix, so I assume other people do the same. Realistically, I know which bits I'm better at and which I'm worse at. I don't think it's a good idea to rely on other people for validation. I've seen way too many shitty artists being praised to do that.
You have to decide whether your ego is more important than getting as near as possible to the ideas you have in your head. If you keep the goal of getting to a certain standard in mind, critique will only be a guide on how to get there.
>>
>>126093206
I get mad and demand that they critique other things, while arguing, agreeing with, or suggesting fixes to what they complained about.
Getting into a pissing match with other people in an ocean of piss is kind of hard though.
>>
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>>126113485
You can have this instead.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v7LBggDKEtM
>>
>https://twitter.com/Raithfyre/status/679083668611072003
>People have no fucking idea what a publisher actually does
Because you don't do anything? :^)
>>
->>126120761
You'll have to try harder than that.
>>
>>126120761
>>126120761
Lmao, I know you are somewhat joking but if you have signed several projects and people (specially people in such a tightly knit community as vn devs) still have no idea what you do other than take a cut and "marketing" then yeah, you are a shit publisher.
>>
>>126120761
Why don't you actually contribute to the discussion and tell us all that the lads at Sekai do?
>>
>>126121190
This is gonna be my only post here but if you actually have questions feel free to send them to me ask.fm/raithfyre
Out of sheer, morbid, masochistic curiosity though, I'm curious what exactly the thread thinks a publisher should be doing that we don't.
>>
>>126119754
That ass looks terrible.
>>126120761
>Bitching on twitter instead of posting it in the thread
How sad.
>>
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Reminder:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsSC2vx7zFQ
>>
>>126121503
> all this projecting
lmao, Sekai was only talked about ONCE before you wrote your tweet (and not even in the "what do they do?" way). Or do you feel that you do so little that when people talk about useless publishers, you assume they are talking about you?
>>
>>126121731
What I'm getting from this is I need to go drown myself and then I'll be successful.
>>
>>126120761
While I'm not going to pop my own NDAs to demonstrate that other video game publishers pay five-figure advances even for little indie titles, it's open knowledge that Choice of Games will pay you an advance for writing right now.
I don't think Raithfyre has worked with a publisher other than Sekai. He knows how they work, fine, but that's now how "a publisher" works.
>>
>>126120761
Lmao. Real pathetic, man. Maybe you should lay off the "cigarettes" indefinitely, because unlike twitter, nobody here is going to luck your ass.
>>
>>126122456
Bingo!
>>
>>126121503
>I'm curious what exactly the thread thinks a publisher should be doing that we don't
I don't know. What DO you do?
There are many possible things that a publisher could do, but since we don't see much of them from our side, we tend to assume that you're not doing much other than pushing the 'publish' button on Steam and promoting a game on your mailing list.
Do you provide detailed QA before a game is released?
Do you manually code all the Steam achievement stuff?
Do you handle tech support after a game is released?
Do you port games to other platforms?
Do you have in-house artists to provide GUI, cover art, promo videos, trading card assets, all the little fiddly things that an amateur dev might have forgotten to do?
Do you provide translations into Japanese, or facilitate contact if that's the direction someone wants to go?
I'm not saying you have to do all of those things, or any of them, but I have no idea what you DO.
>>
>>126121503
>This is gonna be my only post here
And yet you lurk enough to see the previous convo and reply to that post? Nobody wants ask.fm cherry picking.
>>
>all this
/evn/ i hope I never make you mad because... you're a bit terrifying
>>
>>126123276
Let's date.
>>
>>126122997
>Do you provide detailed QA before a game is released?
What is Sakura ____.
>>
>>126122298
What's wrong with Sekai?
I know people are throwing in with them sometimes without thinking, but I thought they did provide some support.
Could be wrong though.
>>
Raith, either ignore this or man the fuck up and answer questions here with a trip. No games, no bullshit.
If Sekai does anything, it's just not showing. Jap titles get so much more attention than EVNs it's ridiculous, so if the same effort is being put into selling both types, it's logical to assume the Jap ones would get attention with or without Sekai.
>>
>>126123516
Basically this >>126122997
Because we don't know much about how they work and because they have (had?) a rather low quality bar, it gives the impression that they don't do anything except more or less effective marketing and taking their cut.
Also, passive aggresive complaining in twitter? People have the right to post whatever they want in their personal accounts, but it seems really childish.
>>
>>126123516
Also, the conversation was about bad publishers, and someone at Sekai felt the need to point out how wrong we are even thought we weren't talking about them until then.
>>
>>126123516
Everything. They take your money, and only promote your game by the occasional tweet and hosting it on their site. If you are making an evn, you do not need a publisher, let alone sekai. Nobody looks at the label "Sekai" and thinks "oh boy, this must mean it's a quality game" anymore.
>>
>>126124087
Oh. I'm not making an EVN, but I'll note that down.
>>
Bcm anon, are you continuing the LP tonight?
>>
>>126124307
Why are you concerned about a publisher who deals almost exclusively in VNs if you're not making one?
>>
>>126123751
Fine. I guess it's easier this way.
Okay, so, let me preface this by saying that we offer all of this, but some developers choose not to take advantage of it all. For instance, some prefer to do their own QA (or none at all). We generally don't strong-arm this sort of thing.
-Obviously, distribution. Steam is the main platform, but we also have our titles available on others such as the Humble Store. GOG doesn't allow visual novels, unfortunately. In addition, we've said before that we're working on being able to publish for the PS Vita. It's a slow process, with lots of paperwork.
We also manage things like achievements and cards and whatnot if we're asked to, plus the various technical aspects.
-Technical support. Pretty self-explanatory.
-We have a QA team, that does, well QA. Obviously some things do slip through. C'est la vie.
-Some of our games have gotten significant direct funding. I'm not going to name names, though I will say that my own work falls under that category.
>>126124041
My tweet was "a response" to >>126100990, which uses a name.
>>
I figured out what Sekai Project does. I'm doing it right now.
>>
>>126124307
... then why do you care? Better yet, why are you here?
>>
>>126124674
Nothing then.
>>
>>126124618
Also, people say that we "neglect our EVN's in lieu of the Japanese ones."
Our list of released EVN's includes the following:
-The Sakura Series
-Sunrider
-Ebi-Hime's works
-Rising Angels
The first two had a representation at Tokyo Games Show earlier this year, as well as as much promotion as we can do with the assets we're given.
With regards to EH's stuff, Asphyxia was admittedly underrepresented. We're going to be changing that with her next game, which is due out soon.
There hasn't been a Rising Angels release since we partnered with IDHAS studios.
>>
Hey HRPdevs.
How come Tess looks so drastically different from all the other sprites? You don't think she looks jarring next to the others you posted her with?
>>
>>126125068
The stuff from the post aren't sprites, just what Myuto put together for character design. Shiyun will be doing the sprites, but those don't yet exist.
>>
>>126124087
> If you are making an evn, you do not need a publisher, let alone sekai.
Hell, in practice you don't even need a finished product. MLanon has gotten a lot of things so far with some art, a pitch, and knowing how to market herself.
>>
>>126125326
Oh. Why post them then?
Oh well. Almost everything else is looking pretty good, ganbatte.
I think that one BG of the ruins looks extremely bad though.
>>
>>126124742
I like to support people who make EVNs, what with being a writer.
I like English, I like novels, I like reading EVNs.
>>126124573
Knowledge of the field. I saw the name on the new Sunrider project, so I membered it and then I heard people talking about it so I asked.
>>
>>126125586
What evn's are your favorite?
>>
>>126125880
I really like Roommates, Katawa Shoujo, Magical Diary, and I have a love hate relationship with the Sunrider series.
I have tried playing more, though, including several free offerings on and off of Steam.
>>
Starlight Vega's last KS update makes it sound like it's coming out really soon.
>General progress on my end is I’m currently finishing up the game build. After that, it's time for additional polish and testing to make sure all the variables, endings, and interwoven scenes are where they need to be. If all goes well, the release for Starlight Vega is just around the corner.
>I hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday season this year. The next update will be a short ways into 2016 with good news for SV!
>>
>>126124618
>>126125045
Glad to see you replying, but it seems allowing devs to do their own QA/not take advantage of the work you guys offer is hurting your reputation very much.
It's coming across as if you have no quality control.
>>
>>126125457
Because we still felt like they look good, and helped make the update more interesting.
>>126125045
Oh, my bad, I forgot to include The Reject Demon: Toko in there too. For some reason I had it sorted into my JVN list and I overlooked it.
>>
>>126126589
I hope this gets a LP here.
>>
>>126126686
Are you the HRP dev that usually posts here?
>>
>>126126825
I hope Lost Pause and Chris Tenarium play it.
>>
>>126127075
Yeah, thus far it's pretty much the only yuri EVN I've ever been remotely interested in.
>>
>>126127020
No, I'm not. I lurk pretty much constantly but almost never post.
>>
>>126127325
Have you thought about doing ads or marketing? That's a huge part of sales and benefits both the dev and the publisher iirc
Do you have any evns coming out soon? Have you thought about taking adspace on some manga or game sites for them?
>>
>>126127721
Something like that wouldn't be my call; it'd be up to my superiors.
EVN's we have coming up:
-Order of Ataxia
-Starlight Vega
-No One But You
-Strawberry Vinegar
-Highway Blossoms
I think there might be new playable stuff from Purrfectly Ever After and Walkerman soon, but I'm not certain.
>>
>>126127231
Have you decided which heroine you're going to pursue? Or are you shooting for harem ending?
>>
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>>126125068
>drastically different
Do they? Her and Mariah look pretty similar to me.
>>
>>126128276
Okay. I don't think sp has to worry about grabbing devs because there really isn't much else and it's The Thing To Do. But seeing SP projects get adspace would make it more attractive
>>
>>126128276
>-No One But You
That one is almost out, too. january 17.
>>
What a reasonable pricing for a game with 150k words? I was thinking 3.99 but at the same time I feel like that's too cheap, to the point where people won't bother buying it because if it's cheap, than the game itself must be cheap as well.
>>
>>126129462
That's way too cheap, since Sakura whatever sell for like $10 and they're only around 40k words. True, they have a lot of CGs, which I guess they say would justify the price, but if EVNs that short can sell for so much I don't see why you shouldn't be charging at least $10 yourself.
>>
>>126128585
Honestly, if the game just contained Lyria and that was it, I'd be pretty happy.
>>
>>126128774
>Those names
I bet you think you're so clever.
>>
>>126130306
What?
>>
>>126090025
Well done posting your work here. I know it's confronting.
You might think you're being interesting by keeping things vague here - and you are, in a sense - biut you've gone too far. If you let me hear what people are saying about "_", then I can get a much better grasp of public opinion, which will also be much more interesting. Show don't tell and all that.
The segue into the next section is crude. You haven't resolved the protagonist's opinion of _ yet, and that thread doesn't really go anywhere. Before it can develop, we're shunted off to another topic.
You also need to srive to cut down your sentences. The start of the second paragraph could become "I sat down on a bench near the fountain," and we would lose no information.
Then the reminiscence. This is where you need more detail. Describe her face to us - twisted up with fear, lust and hatred, her mouth opening and closing like shejust couldn't get the words out, her hands balled up and shaking like she wanted to hit me over and over again. You say you remember it vividly, so describe it to us vividly. It's far more interesting.
You also don't go anywhere with this. How does the protagonist feel about whatever happened? Does he regret his actions? Does he think she was being a bitch? Give him some character.
Ultimately, the lack of detail or exploring the thought process makes it feel we haven't been told anything by all this - I still don't know what people say about _, or much at all about whatever happened.
So yeah, tl;dr, go and practice showing detail to tell your story.
>>
>>126114793
Thanks for the advice, I really do need to cut back on adverbs and "padding" in sentences. Also, same with the underscores. Hardest thing for me is coming up with names for people/groups/etc.
>>126131084
Thanks, I've been reading over it and that memory should've been more detailed like you said.
>I still don't know what people say about _
I probably should've provided some background info when posting earlier, but basically MC is walking through the city and overhearing people's different conversations on a disaster that just took place, caused by ___. The people's conversations are supposed to provide background on how people feel about ___.
>>
>>126133309
Ah. I'd definitely show us snippets of those conversations, as it will make everything feel far more real.
>>
>>126133952
Yeah, I definitely should've posted more earlier, I was just worried that if it was a wall of text people would've been less likely to read all of it and not comment.
>>
>>126135010
I like walls. Berlin. China.
My first wife was Chinese, which also put up a metaphorical language barrier between us, which is a type of wall. I'd tell her I was going to work, and she'd speak Chinese at me, and I'd be very glad I was scretly having an affair with a Romanian transgendered prostitute.
Eventually I wanted a divorce, so I approached a Chinese lawyer to draft a letter of intent. Unfortunately, he truned out to be my wife's brother. This led to an awkward conversation where she screamed at me in Chinese, and I just screamed back in faux-greek because I knew she couldn't understand me. Then I hit her over the head with one of the ten hat stands that omprise my hat stand collection, and kept hitting her until she was dead.
After that I donated her body to a dumpling maker in China town. I felt it was oddly fitting.
I have never been caught.
I now own twelve hat stands.
>>
>>126124618
These are all things a developer can do themselves.
>Some of our games have gotten significant direct funding.
Not significant enough seeing the majority use Kickstarter.
>>
>>126135723
Not if they don't have a strong technical team, or if they need direct funding to get a demo together for kickstarter. Of course, whether a team needs either of those depends on the team.
>>
>>126135630
This is getting embarrassing.
>>
>>126136253
Just ignore, senpai.
>>
>>126136253
I suppose twelve hatstands isn't quite the world record number of 616, but I'm working on it. I'm presently eyeing up a 12th century Persian hatstand on ebay, made of carved ivory and gold filigree. Someday I will make you envious of my collection.
>>
>>126129462
Wordcount alone does not determine the pricing.
For example, many Choice Of Games games are that length or longer, and sell for $3.99 or less. There's a reason for that, and it doesn't mean that your game should go for that price.
Your pricing needs to take into account what your game looks like, what its content is, what its hooks are like, whether you have gameplay, whether you have choices, what the length of an average first playthrough is like, and many other things.
>>
Do you already have to have a big following to get your game on Steam?
>>
>>126137760
No, not really. Greenlight nowadays is largely a handwave, almost anything can get through. If you need to pass Greenlight, you'll want to do a little bit of self-promotion in the usual places, but if your game doesn't look like shit and you ask folks around here and twitter and other EVN hangouts to forward it, it'll probably get where it needs to be.
It's not like a few years ago where you needed to defeat ten thousand games in mortal combat.
>>
>>126136636
Art is Brilliant Shadows tier, no gameplay, only 2 LI, about 11 total choices (that matter greatly), three different endings plus a true route, and the genre is fantasy/otome. Based on this info, what would you recommend me pricing it at?
>>
>>126138406
I'd say it also depends on quality of artwork and how many CGs there are. Also sprites and sprite variations.
>>
>>126138406
$7-10 depending on how well people react to the art. It'll do $10 fine if the love interests are sufficiently appealing.
>>
>>126138668
Well obviously those things matter but at some point it comes down to needing the actual game to judge, so I'm trying to go for general guidelines.
>>
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>joke about Eroge! And its relation to reality
>gradually discover I'm the only man on the team
>>
>>126138406
>Art is Brilliant Shadows tier
This comment is oddly perfect. I'd go 7-10$.
>>
>>126139343
Would you fuck your co-workers though?
>>
>>126138668
These are estimations for I have yet to begin on the art, but
Cg's: 33
BG's: 15
Sprites: 14 + unknown amount of variations
>>126139094
>>126139364
Thank you for your input, I will keep it in mind for the future.
>>
>>126140879
Not the fat ones, and not before we finish this project.
Time to get productive.
>>
>>126141149
Oh, yeah then 13-15$. That is a decent amount of content.
>>
I'm sorry, but I am a massive retard, how so I read steamspy? For example,
>Players total: 6,788 ± 1,786 (29.1%)
Means that the people who bought the game Asphyxia is somewhere within the range of 8,574 to 5002?
>>
>>126142774
That game did a bundle which fluffed up numbers by a good amount. Steamspy doesn't say if they bought it for $7 or .50c
>>
>>126143052
I know, I'm just talking about the number of people who bought the game, not at what price they bought it at.
>>
>>126142774
You've got it right.
>>
>>126143176
Okay, thankyou.
>>
>>126143176
No, you're completely misreading it because you're not looking and just offhandedly approving him.
> Owners: 23,327 ± 3,312
> Players in the last 2 weeks: 756 ± 739 (3.24%)
> Players total: 6,788 ± 1,786 (29.1%)
Players is their guesstimate for the number of people who have, at some point, launched the game.
Owners is their estimate of people who own the game. (Bought, if you must, but free keys count as well.)
>>
>>126143501
Thankyou for your help!
>>
Sure is dead in here. I'm going to bed.
>>
>>126144865
Good night, sweet anon. May flights of waifus sing you to your rest.
>>
Transreligion shitposter reporting. Kebabs, Fedoras and Heathens can sleep well while I bump the thread.
>>
>>126146407
I identify as a Buddhist and this post offends me.
>>
>>126147393
Ah, the fun of other religions without converting or running the risk of apostasy. OH! daily reminder that one in two Muslims believe that Apostasy should be punished with death.
>>
Began writing for my project today, feels good.
>>
Has anyone read Sakura Santa? What's the opinion of it?
>>
>>126150187
Lmao.
>>
Wake up shitposters!
>>
>>126150187
I wanted to buy it but I don't have time to play it. I'll just get the CG off sadpanda later
>>
ubmp
>>
>tfw an artist had to force me to let him start working on a thing
>>
>>126124525
Maybe shortly. It's 3:30AM my time though so I'm not sure how long.
The LPs are probably going to be kind of sporadic, between work and personal stuff, but I'll do my best to finish it for you all!
My LPs are mostly going to be Thursday nights and weekends.
>>
>The game contains 6,541 dialogue blocks, containing 77,199 words
I'm slow but I'm still gettin there
>>
Bed time 4 m3
>>
Seriously though, where does one even sell hentai EVNs?
>>
>>126167943
denpasoft has quite a few. manga gamer.
>>
>>126167943
Steam with patchs
>>
murder mystery evn when
>>
>>126168086
Oh right, forgot about MG, thanks.
>>126168254
Pls elaborate. A Steam release and then a separate ddl with decensoring?
>>
>>126170723
Detective Butler. Jisei.
That's two.
>>
>>126170723
Ask in#scriptforge ;^)
>>
>>126170723When I finishIn like two years or whatever
>>
>>126171265
do they even still have any live projects?
>>
>>126172351
One, it's calleddoto :DD :D
>>
>>126129462
I thought 'regular novel' length went for $5 bucks, so three times that much should be at least twice as much in cost.
>>
I sincerely hope our sprite artiststops drawing our heroine in christmas wrapping bondage soon.
Everyone can understand loneliness and wish fulfillment, but
1. There's a fucking schedule;
2. Project dropbox exists for project files.
10/10 I'm mad.
>>
>>126174621
Put them all into a PDF.
Sell for like $2.
Don't do it until he gets his shit back on schedule though or he might use it as an excuse to draw MORE of this. The idea is hey, at least you make a little profit off of art you didn't have to pay for! Put it back into team gamedev stuff.
>>
>>126174621
Good luck with that plan, sucker.
>>
>>126174621
Sounds like you don't have your priorities straight.
>>
>>126168086
>denpasoft has quite a few
A grand total of 3 of the 5 vns they carry, 2 of which are Sakura games.
>>
>>126174621
Your artist is Maullar?
>>
>>126176218
Thank you for the wise advice, merry merchant. This is a solid idea.
>>126180038
Nope, but she's surprisingly good at lewds.
>>
AHHHHHHHHHHHH
>>
> when a game is taking so long that a game inspired by it may actually come out before
>>
>>126188483
What games are these?
>>
>>126173357
>I thought 'regular novel' length went for $5 bucks
No.
There are games much shorter than novel length going for more than that, and, as mentioned, CYOAs of 150K+ going for less than that. Wordcount alone != price.
>>
What evn devs/whomever do you follow on twitter? Is there anyone actually useful there?
>>
>>126195886
I tend not to follow devs on twitter, because their development and personal accounts are usually the same.
>>
>>126171174
Not the guy you replied too but yeah. "Everlasting Summer" already did it.
Also, fuck, those Russians can make a hell of a background. Shame for the sprites though.
>>
>>126195886
evn devs seem to be either massive SJWs or depressed crybabies on twitter. I only follow project or team pages these days.
>>
>>126197731
I'm neither!And neither am I a dev!
>>
>>126196521
i try to mainly post only dev stuff on twitter but there are only so many ways you can say 'yes i'm still proofreading this story, as i have been for the last month' while still being interesting. deving isn't actually very exciting - especially when you get into the last stretch of making a vn, where all the assets are done and you don't have anything new to show anyone, but you still can't release it because you need to fine tune all the gui and loop the music properly and re-read your writing over and over for missing apostrophes or whatever.
>>
>>126195886
If you want useful I don't know about twitter, social media is a game that you have to be social to play at. If you're not filling up the space with random shit you're not using the format to its potential.
Basically if you just want dev updates from me don't follow my twitter, read the actual game thread.
>>
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>>126200328
She looka like a man.
---
I think I need to get some social media set up for my project. I think it would help people learn about it.
>>
>>126201414
I will never understand some people's ideas of gender cues.
>>
>>126188538
Duenkhy & ML.
>>
>>126202570
I don't understand.
>>
>>126204025
It's not my art but I don't understand how she looks like a man. Is it just because she has no tits? How much does an artist have to exaggerate feminine characteristics for someone to not say 'looks like a man'?
>>
>>126204537
Her face isn't cute at all so I guess that. Looks better in the mini full body though.
>>
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>>126202570
Her face in the left most section is very mannish. The nose and jawline lack femininity, as does the face structure.
The other two are fine, the face in the left is manface.
>>
When someone says that a game uses "high school anime tropes", what does that mean to you?
>>
>>126206986
It uses high school anime tropes.
>>
>>126195886
Funny this is bcm edition but aurocyanide tends to post good stuff. Lots of her views on makin evn I agree with. Most people are insufferable cunts and very passive aggressive.
>>
>>126206986
That it's going to be shit.
>>
>>126207480
>slow clapping
what are these tropes, in your estimation?
>>
>>126208576
>slow clapping
Go away.
>>
>>126208576
Tropes found in anime high schools.
>>
>>126209034
I'm sorry that my 50% shitpost is culturally variant from your 100% shitpost.
>>
I looked at \vn\ out of curiosity. is it required to be retarded to enjoy vn?
>>
>>126210139
Yes.
>>
>>126210139
Much like /evn/, /vn/'s favorite pasttime is shitposting, but at an Olympic level.
>>
wrote 4k today, I feel good.
>>
I'm going to go make a turkey sandwich.
>>
>>126214685
>>126215054
Did you add mayo? If you did, I think you won the productivity showdown.
>>
>>126215494
>using condiments
How embarrassing.
>>
>>126215494
>>126216012
No, it turns out I was out of turkey. Only meat I had was some old fish. And then I turned on the TV to the food channel, and I'm seeing these cooks do all these fancy flips and adding all kinds of spices and shit so I decided I'm going to be creative for once like the chefs on Chopped. Fucking big mistake. I get out the pan, add some peppers to the pan with the fish, I turn away for just a few seconds and the damn thing is on fire. So now I'm eating Hershey kisses and a slice of bread. I guess some people were just never meant to cook.
>>
>>126217789
If you were a cute girl from Japan we would all find you moe. As it is, I think you should probably work on your cooking skills.
---
So, my father died a few months ago and I am using his Macbook Pro-- does anyone write for VNs on OSX? Should I use word, google docs, or is there some other convenient app you write in?
>>
>>126219412
Google docs all the way. That way you don't have to depend on a thumb drive or if you travel a lot it's good for that too.
>>
>>126219412
Oh, and sorry about your dad, didn't read that part the first time.
>>
>>126219412
I get the feeling you know how stupid this question is and just wanted to attention whore about your dead dad.
>>
>>126219808
Not really, he passed away a good while ago. I actually included that to fend off people who automatically troll people who get macs (I have always hated them myself, but this one was "free").
Maybe the internet has changed its stance on macs since my time. I am thirty, but usually saying "I got a mac" was begging to be trolled.
>>
New thread needed soon - topic suggestions?
>>
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>>126221107
Santa Claus is Cumming
>>
>>126220518
I use a macbook for work and the go to is Word on there, however, I second using Google Drive/Docs-- Until you start making huge documents anyway, though that might just be my shitty internet lagging.
>>
>>126221107
Well, I think BCM is sort of out, none of us really want to see the LP regarding the three painters thing either. Maybe update with a call for progress and some EVN related to xmas?
I think new years is a good time for us to do a roundup of people's progress.
>>
>>126221380
I vote this one. Need some Christmas spirit for the next thread.
>>
>>126222872
>I think new years is a good time for us to do a roundup of people's progress.
Yeah, I think it would be good to compile a list of evns that looks like they will release or otherwise made significant progress.
>>
>>126223585
>list
>from here
Ha, good luck getting people to ever talk and give the name of their project here.
>>
>>126226779
Not necessarily from here? I assume most of us keep an eye on promising projects.
>>
>>126226779
Look dude, cynicism doesn't get things done and you aren't posting anything of value. I am pretty sure that we could collaborate to make a spreadsheet. I think that compared to the moon landing, the great pyramids of Egypt, the great wall of China-- that we might... we might just be able to put together a spreadsheet. It might not be too much of an endeavor for our community.
So stop being an ass.
>>
>>126227241
That wasn't the point of his post.
>>
I want to write a custom route for a stupid VN I've played, please give me something better to do with my life.
>>
>>126226779
Maybe this is me being optimistic, but I imagine quite a few EVN devs who actually do write things and have released VNs post here, they just don't say who they are because most devs probably use this thread as a way to bitch about other people in the community they don't like, so they don't want other people to know they post here.
I-I mean, it's not like I'd do something like that or anything...!
>>
>>126227654
Graduate college, pay off student loans for the next 10 years, get married, have two children, buy a house, save for the childrens education, and work, work, work. Then finally, when you're 95, you can retire. Good luck, for this is going to take a while.
>>
>>126228516
Well yeah, what else is the point of this thread? This thread is just gossip central with the very small and occasional critique of art/writing, nobody wants to be associated with this cesspool. Not that it's all that bad, I love /evn/, but in no way would I ever want to be associated with this place and I don't fault anyone else for not wanting to either.
>>
>>126228620
>10 years
Uh, I'm going to be done with these loans before the third year is up.
>>
>>126228853
Congrats, you are well on your way. Now you just need to get married, buy a house, have kids, and then save for their education.
>>
>>126228849
You guys seriously overexaggerate how much posting here can affect your reputation.
>>
>>126229126
Yes, because if some random from tumblr/lemma/whatever found out about their favorite evn dev posting here, they would get curious and visit. What do you think is going to go through a persons mind when they see that a creator visits a thread like this? The bitching, shitting on other devs, and terms that'll piss off the average normie ("faggot", those allahu akbar euroshitters, and all around racism/sexism/whatever that is common to 4chan everywhere and not just this thread) is going to look bad.
>>
>>126229126
Yeah, I imagine a lot of people won't care, but it'll make you look less 'pro' or something, idk. I'm just saying, I bet there are a bunch of devs on here who do produce work, but they don't talk about it because they'd rather complain about other people or vent out their petty grievances or jealousies or self-doubts or whatever. I see a lot of people on here say all the devs who lurk evn are unproductive but I don't think that's the case - it's just, people don't come here to talk about being productive, they come here to moan.
>>
>>126229036
Or I could not breed and just work on that custom route, I guess.
Custom routes are cheaper than kids.
>>
>>126229626
Excuses, excuses.
>>
>>126229893
If you say so.
>>
>>126230000
Your post boils down to is "some rando from tumblr is gonna be upset."
>>
>>126230087
Yes? I want as much money as I can get, why would I willingly lose sales to just tell people that I browse this shit hole? There is literally no gain to that. Only a loss.
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>>126230329
What makes you think you'll lose sales? If posting on 4chan is such a big deal and will sink your game, why is Katawa Shoujo the most popular EVN, even among people who loathe 4chan?
hint: because it's good(to them)and they care more about the game than the site it came from.
Dischan started out prominently advertising Cradle Song on /a/. Afterward, everyone knew they were dirty 4chan users and vowed never to buy any products from them ever. That's how that whole thing went, right?
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>>126229626
I'm not sure anyone will notice.
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>>126230726
Well, they did completely and utterly implode, turning themselves into laughing stocks that no one should buy anything from ever, so.
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>>126232179
And that a grand total of zero percent to do with posting on 4chan.
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>>126232308
Being the kind of cunts who post on 4chan probably didn't help, but in that case we're all already doomed.
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>>126232660
If that was so, people who post on tumblr would only get some minor props from people who reblog them and everyone else would ignore.
We're probably fine.
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>>126229803
>>126227654
So, what's the custom route you want to write, huh?
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AAAHHHHHHHH somebody make the new thread.
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>>126233076
A Claude route for Sunrider Academy.
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>>126234114
>claude
What a manly name for a girl.
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>>126234063
Why didn't you?
Why didn't you help the turtle?
Why are you just standing there staring at it?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
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>>126235147
New thread
Thread posts: 752
Thread images: 73
Thread images: 73