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So you're back in highschool, and Jesus Christ (the coolest

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So you're back in highschool, and Jesus Christ (the coolest kid in the whole school) is coming over to play video games with you. What game(s) do you have prepared to play when he arrives and how bad do you get rekt once you guys start?
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Smash. What character do you think Jesus would play?
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>>390110108
Well Jesus as a kid was a little shit so I don't think I would win at any game in vidya if he gets pissed. That said, anything relaxing.
Jesus would probably tear it up at ddr
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>>390110305
What makes you think that? As far as I remember he always ran off when his parents traveled to go to church and they lost him for several days because of it and he acted like they should have expected him to be there.
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Uncle Moses would never allow it.
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>>390110250
WARIO

just kidding i have no idea maybe Jigglypuff.
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>>390110108
Bible Black
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>>390110375
you mean synagogue
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>>390110479
How do you play a VN with someone
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>>390110612
yeah sorry i don't remember
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>>390110375
Well if you do a little reasearch on texts not admitted into the Bible because of controversy to the Image of the messiah, you'll find that at ages 1 to 7 he was basically pushing other kids around literally, and when some dude came into his fathers wood working shop taking shit about the quality of the work, baby Jesus took his goddamn eyes.
So yeah, kid Jesus would probably go ape shit if he couldn't keep his cool playing anything like cod or even fighting games.
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>>390110375
Some extracanonical texts have Jesus kill a kid He didn't like, but bring him back when Joseph told Him to stop being a dick
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>>390110713
But far be it from me to accept non official scripture as part of the story. Gotta keep it kosher yeah?
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Who would his Mario Kart main be, unironically?
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>>390110713
>>390110757
You realize there's a reason those aren't canon right?
It's comprable to excluding the monstrocities described of Ben Garrison online from his biography should one be written
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>>390110108
Twisted Metal 2, Mario Kart DS, and Metal Slug 3

What would be the best multiplayer mecha game to play with Lord Jesus Christ our Saviour?
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>>390111046
Unironically? Mario.
Ironically? DK.
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Would Jesus approve of me playing Monster Girl Quest?
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>>390111360
Unlikely
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>>390111074
Hey man, every story has its shadow. You really think a newly born omnipotent being ISNT going to experiment and maybe do something considered fucking horrible by everyone but it's okay because he quickly reversed it so it was quickly forgotten because hay he did something else that was nice

Just saying man, grains of salt go a long way with these things and stomping on feelings is always the worst way to do shit. I was just pointing out why I thought maybe baby Jesus wouldn't be a good vidya partner, because with the levels of autism known to the average video game player, an omnipotent video game player would be a fucking hornet nest kind of deal.

But maybe baby Jesus would be chill as shit about it. Play some jet set radio and just skate or something. Maybe just flip around ny as Spider-Man trying to get to mr. Conor's class. I don't know bro.
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>>390111360
He never really forced anyone to do anything but he said it in a "for your own good" way. He'd probably tell you to throw out all of your tempting video games and say that it's better to lose the games than to lose your life. (My source is his minispeech on adultery where he said that if your right eye causes you to stutter, it's better to gauge it out and throw it away than to have your whole body thrown away.)
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>>390111483
I never even knew that there were other writings that weren't included in the bible.
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Bad Company. Used to go 50 kills 0 death on the 360 as a Specialist. Jesus doesn't exist. Eat shit. If you don't, believe me, I had gynecomastia as an average height/weight guy fresh/soph year so what else was I going to do?
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>>390112312
*tips fedora
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>>390112242
Well, I'm glad I was able to show you something new. Actually, most of the scripted mentioned in the thread are still in the Jewish holy book the Torah and pretty sure they're in the Koran too.

They just didn't make it into the Bible because a later more Orthodox Church of the Byzantine empire omitted and added some things that are now generally accepted worldwide as the canon Christian faith. Somehow the stories are hush hush even though now I think people might be able to see past the immediate "oh shit he did that" shock of the stories and get to the actual lesson it's trying to convey.
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Are there games where I can ally with angels?
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>>390111483
There was also plenty of slander post-crucifixtion, if the people of rome, jerusalem, somalia, and elsewhere killed the apostles for how they talked about Jesus, why is it unreasonable to discern between documents speaking about Him as canon or not, especially era-correct ones?
Things that contradict His nature as laid out by those who describe Him correctly as the sinless son of God (because without that there is no religion) and use His name to either front a cause or to simply make His followers look bad should not be considered based on the orthodox interpretation of His life and works
Simply, for one reason or another, those documents were decanonized because they present an untrue or uneccesary look at the early life of Jesus because Jesus wasn't a savescummer with reality (because that denies His incarnation as wholly man which cheapens His death on the cross)
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>>390113215
But that's the whole reason why it was so controversial. The people who believed he was a man wholly and truly can't accept that he would do those things.

The other side, who saw him as wholly divine, could easily accept a savescumming god as long as he put everyone on the best timeline.

The conundrum is how he could leave us on the best timeline and also die as a human is why it got so convoluted and here had to be mass callings to every priest with any standing to get the story straightened out to mass appeal.

I'd say the truth is somewhere in between, but omitting and adding things just changed goal posts. The vision of the man himself must have been something else, if not something entirely more.
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>>390110108
Unteralterbach
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I wonder what Jesus would think
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>>390113214
SMT
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>>390113214
Where did it say that angles have wings? To be honest I never read that, all I read is that "their appearance was like lightning" which is AS USUAL as vague as possible like The Bible likes to be. What the heck does "their appearance was like lightning" mean?
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>>390113882
>Above him were seraphim, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying.
Isaiah 6:2
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In the other religious thread, someone mentioned that angels were really powerful. How powerful are they?
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>>390114183
Mind bendingly so. Inconceivable.
The twist? They didn't do anything with it: wasn't their job. Their job was to sing about how great God is for 100% of all eternity. Maybe be a messenger if God wants to send one to say somethin'.

Also, the whole "tier" thing of angels is not a part of Christianity. That's just a fan's databook made for funsies. There are were only a few named angels and, like, 4 groups MAX of what other angels might be categorized as.
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>>390114028
So they have wings on their faces that actually cover their face? How come no one draws it like that?

>>390114183
IDK, Lucifer was supposed to be the #1 leader angel, and he is described as being pretty OP.
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>>390113516
Read the documentations and examinations of the First Council of Nicea if you want to know exactly why each document was canonized or not because it has to do with the very reason of personal interpretations coming to a head in full blown heresy, the most popular of which (which was also what the most powerful among society believed in the wake of the legalization) was arianism which reduced Christ to some created thing, denying His divinity and this had to be addressed in collecting everything they knew justifiably about the son of God
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>>390114463
The letter to the Hebrews specifically condemns angel study and worship because that undermines the whole point of Jesus's work
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>>390114463
Could you provide some context on their power level?
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>>390114464
>How come no one draws it like that?
Same reason Jesus is drawn as a tall, fair-skinned, blue-eyed north european man.
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>>390114780
Everyone who meets one falls on their face out of fear everyone
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>>390114780
I'm not the other anon, but I found this from Matthew (aka: the best account in the bible objectively speaking)
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>>390114464
Because angels took human form as well (see sodom) and that is a greater display of artistic skill than some esoteric stuff only the prophets saw so it looks better on medeival resume and looks better in general
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>>390114780
Looking at them was enough to make humans go insane, die or outright turn into dust.

There a biblical contexts where a single angel would completely eradicate armies of humans hundreds of thousands strong in the span of a single night. Or a single angel tasked with guarding the garden of Eden to keep mankind out anymore was all that was needed as he could see every instance of its boundaries and strike that all he could be seen as was a single sword that was on fire. Or that their voices would quake the very atomic structure of the universe when they sang in unison. None of them looked human, either. The closest they got was some had, among their 4 heads, a human one (made in the image of God in the first place) or that they have 4 limbs.

"Do not be afraid." Every wondered why every angel said that first thing to man whenever they had to tell them something?
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>>390115131
>strike that all he could be seen as was a single sword that was on fire.

That's badass and awesome
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>>390114183
As powerful as the Lord tells them to be.
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>>390115131
>>390115275
>game has you attempt to sneak into the Garden of Eden
>if the angel sees you, you are instantly incinerated by a sword made of fire
>the angel sees everything
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>>390115275
That's the point, it's also why God loves humility, you ain't shit compared to that but He made you to be more important than them
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>>390115275
Genesis 3:24 - After he drove the man out, he placed on the east side of the Garden of Eden cherubim and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to guard the way to the tree of life.

It's difficult if it was a single angel or a group, but they were/were in posession of a flaming sword with inconceivable angles that was so fast and omnipresent it was basically just seen to be flashing across the area it guarded.
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>>390115572
>fucking Cherubim with flaming swords
Sounds terrifying
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>Where do you think you're going?
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>>390114464
Angels look like what God wants them to be.
Lucifer was a djinn btw
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>>390115767
Either way, what the fuck is Satan's problem?

The fuck is wrong with him?
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>>390115572
>It's difficult if it was a single angel or a group
It's not difficult. Just reference a literal translation (YLT works) and, if you're balls are made of steel, the OJB. That will tell you everything you need to know about specifics. Also, the most appropriated version, NLT (the opposite of literal, one that translates slangs and uncommon word uses from the native language/time period into something we'd better understand).

It's a group of cherubim and a flaming sword, btw.
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>>390115907
He tempts humans, and they keep failing his tests
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>>390116025
But why does he do it?
I never understood why he was such a dick.
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>>390116074
He was tasked to do so by God.
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>>390116074
>Hey Satan, I want you to test humans to see if they are good and faithful
>Okay, God. I'm sure they'll pass
>Oh my God, all of these humans are trash
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>>390116152
So does God not hate Satan then?
Why is there a need to temp humans?
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>>390115767
>>390116152
Is this the Muslim belief or the Christian belief?
Besides everyone already knows it's impossible for humans to ever learn so there is literally no point of testing, it should be expected.
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>>390116074
Satan means "adversary." Sometimes this is used to describe a single entity, other times it is used in general for all opposition.

But the point of Satan is like so: all sticks are meant to not break, but this means nothing if none of these sticks are tested. Satan is the one that give them the ole bend test.

>>390116152
>tasked to do so
I doubt that. Consider the story of Job. Over and over, Satan begs to fuck Job's shit up for no reason just to prove that he isn't actually righteous. And Job withstands pretty much all of it: losing his family, losing his wealth, losing his health - everything. And he remains righteous until his pricks that he called friends come up and tell him to repent for something he didn't do. That was Job's breaking point - not anything Satan did, but being falsely accused.

But Satan was a real fucking jerk there.
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What was the leviathan?
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>>390116478
About Job, does anyone understand God's answer to Job?

He showed him the sky or something, and two animals? Was the only point of that answer to convey that Job is too dumb to actually understand God's knowledge, or was God supplying him with other knowledge through that? Wtf does it mean?
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>>390116643
From a historical perspective, the largest crocodile found in the Indus river valley. Weapons and tools not fashioned out of metals would be difficult break the scales of this beast.

It could also have been some whale, though it was said to be in a sea.
But literally, it is some giant sea serpent. A sort of aquatic dragon or hydra.
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Need for Speed Underground, SSX tricky, Tony Hawk Underground, Lotr return of the King, Eye toy and Dead or Alive 2.
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>>390116643
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Job+41&version=NLT
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>>390116712
Which part? Towards the end, God is basically challenging Job with shit like, "If you think you're so fucking hot, go capture the Leviathon and see how that goes, asshole!" (Job 41)

And Job was like, "Whoa man, I ain't that hot. I repent." And with Job repented, one of the universe's largest brofists happen in that moment. (Job 42).
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>>390110108
Mario Party 3. I'll teach that nigga how2stigmata.
>>390111483
I'm personally a fan of the asian branch of cristianity view that posits Jesus went missing in his 20s and ended up soulsearching in India, where he attained enlightenment after learning from local yogis.
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>>390113516
How would savescumming make him a perfect sinless human being at all? God the father would still know that he sinned. His sacrifice wouldn't result in atonement for anyone.
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>>390117126
>God blessed Job in the second half of his life
>then Job lived 140 years after that...
Lunar calendar, right? So, just ten more yea...
>...living to see four generations of his children and grandchildren
..rs. Hmm.
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>>390115907
>the lightbringer
>implying God's greatest servant simply fell
Everything is as according to God's plan. For good to exist, so must evil.
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>>390117607
A year in the bible is still a year, anon.
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>>390117607
>lunar year
>not similar to solar year
Do you think passover and all the festivals happened every month, anon?
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>>390116914
>NLT
Outta here child
Reminder that if your translation source isn't originally the greek and hebrew inscriptions, or at the very very least the vulgate then it's trash
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>>390110108

I dont know what game but darn if that Yeshua is a real cutie patootie
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>>390117951
NLT, YLT, and OJB are the perfect triad for understanding what exactly is being said or meant to be said.

In my experience, at least.
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>>390117727
>>390117836
But what about Adam and his son Seth and his son Enosh and his son etc and Noah all living 950+ years???
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Why did God test Abraham if that was Satan's job?
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>>390118159
When does Satan test for obedience?
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>>390118263
Oh wait you're right. Never mind.
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>>390110250
He'd make a mii fighter of himself.
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>>390118079
They were before Genesis 6, of course. That is largely the reason for this decision.
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>play Tetris with Jesus
>He gets Long lines all game
>MFW I get only the shitty S blocks
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>>390116478
i dont think satan is a jerk at any time in the bible. with job he basically said to god 'your followers only praise you because you bless them. if you take away their blessings they will reject you.'

which satan proved pretty will with job who ended up breaking at the very end. the only reason job doesnt reject god at the end is, like you said, god basically says he can do anything he wants, and job can either accept it or get fucked. and job just sits in his inequity and powerlessness and gives up, realizing all he can do is try to be on the good side of god who does whatever he wants.

whos the jerk in that story? satan? cause it seems like all he did was prove a point that gods jewish followers didnt love him. they loved his blessings. god bullying the fuck out of job didnt disprove this either.
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>>390118512
Job passed all of Satan's tests. With every last one of his blessings stripped, and left to suffer with afflictions of the flesh, Job refused to turn from righteousness. He proved God's point.

Then his former friends showed up, unrelated to Satan's test, and left false accusations that eventually led Job to blasphemy. Remember that like 30 of the 42 chapters are Job insisting he hadn't done wrong, and his friends countering, "If you hadn't done wrong, this wouldn't have happened!"
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Fight of Gods
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>>390118769
This.

How come everyone in Christianity who's a good person gets falsely accused of some shit?
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>>390118502
>god's sons
>sons

hol up

does any church actually explain this shit
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>>390114464
>So they have wings on their faces that actually cover their face?

Well it doesn't necessarily say that the wings are on their faces, only that that they're using a pair of wings to cover their faces. Where the wings are coming from isn't specified in that line of text.
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>>390118925
Nephilim. Angels. Divine creations of God that are not "man." 100% always male, and apparently capable of knocking up man's hot thots.
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So what exactly is Betatron?
Where is he mentioned?
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gotta play some fps
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>>390119081
>creations as opposed to crotchfruit from something

oh ok anon
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>>390118925
You hadn't heard that angels bred with human women before the flood? That's pretty common knowledge, m8.

Heck, it's so popular that it has entered pop-culture with all sorts of misunderstandings, like people (Blizzard) pretending that the offspring of angels and humans are the nephalim, when in actuality the nephalim are most likely giants who separately existed before this point and after.

For example of other people who commonly get it wrong, see >>390119081.
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>>390118502
>So his days will be one hundred twenty years
That's a little less than the maximum age that humans have ever recorded in history, surely no one lived that long ever at the time this was written. Clearly a prediction towards the human body and how long it generally lives in ideal circumstances.

>God's sons came in to men's daughters and had children with them
.........
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>>390119224
The person who wrote that sentence (Moses) is recorded as living over 120 years.

It was always a soft cap.
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>>390119092
You know how literally any Star Wars book published before Disney bought the IP isn't canon.

He's mentioned in something like that. Fan-created fiction.
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>>390118769
youre missing the point completely. it doesnt matter if it is satans test or not. satans point was that faith depends on blessings. it doesnt matter if satan directly took those blessing or not.

when jobs friends denounced him, job snaps. one of the reasons he snaps is because he believes god has forsaken him, which causes a crisis of the faith for job, only cured by god intervening.

if god didnt come down in a fiery tornado, it is unclear what job would have done. god intervenes to stop whatever might have happened. but its clear that blessings are a necessity for followers of god, not just because of providing a reason to follow god, but because they are the only way god shows his followers that they are worshiping him properly.

if you take away the blessings, all that is left is feelings of forsakeness, and confusion.

validating satans point, that without blessings, gods followers will not follow him.
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I liked the story about the men who tried to rape a girl and acuse her of being a whore. I forgot about it.
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>>390119452
but doesn't anon explain job only broke when he was falsely accused of something?

Unless you count having friends who aren't dicks as a blessing
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>>390119178
The details of Noah's ark is explicit in the Bible, by the way. We know EXACTLY what it looked like and EXACTLY how big it was.
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>>390110108
>blue eyed Jesus

Dumb Yuros
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>>390119529
the reason it gets to him is because he feels god has forsaken him, because of his blessings disappearing, compounded with them repeatedly saying that he is upsetting god.

he is starting to be convinced, but it makes a lot of sense, why else would god take everything form him unless he was upsetting god. it takes a lot to get to job, but eventually he feels either god has forsaken him, he has done something wrong, or that god is in someway committing an evil on him.

the friends speaking to him are the proverbial hair that breaks his back.
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>>390119464
I think it's called Emergence
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>>390110108
Super Noah's Ark 3D
Wolfenstein 3D: The Spear of Destiny
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>>390119659
I see thanks

I never knew I'd be having serious bible discussion for the first time of my life on /v/ but here we are
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>>390119081
Since I singled you out in my last point, I'll also correct you directly.

>Angels. Divine creations of God that are not "man." 100% always male, and apparently capable of knocking up man's hot thots.
Correct. Although, any diligent scholar will be quick to point out that "bnei HaElohim" or "Sons of God" is a different term used from the hundreds of other times angels are referenced (angels are called "malach" or "messengers" 99.9% of the time).

Now,
>Nephilim
The HaNefilim are not the bnei HaElohim. They are spoken of separately and spoken of as existing separately. At this point in the Bible, we know practically nothing else about them. Their only other mention is in Numbers or something around there when the Exodus refugees see "giant HaNefilim" and must fight them.

Numbers 13:33:
>And there we saw the Nephilim, the Bnei Anak, which come of the Nephilim; and we were in our own sight as grasshoppers, and so we were in their sight.

The children of humans and angels are specifically called "gibborim" - "which were of old, men of renown."

This whole post is why I find reading the OJB to be essential for not losing meaning in translation. They leave nouns untranslated, in their original forms, to prevent misunderstanding.
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>>390119760
/v/ is the best place for religious discussions
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>>390119452
You bring up a valid argument, and although I don't agree completely, I won't argue it either.
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>>390119209
No see, in the Diablo setting the Nephilim are descendants of angels and demons and their loss of power from the Worldstone being set up made them regular humans.
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>>390119668
Nah, I looked up at it was The story of Susanna.
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>>390119178
>>390119560
2 of every living creature, including sufficient food supplies, which is determined to be ~371 days.

All living creatures on the planet died but for those on the ark.
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>>390119760
old testament god was a very different god then the one we think of when we imagine christianity now.

he was violent, jealous, selfish, and even apparently lost a battle to another god after a king sacrificed his first born child to Chemosh(?) to drive out the isrealites.

the reason pharaoh didnt let moses and his people go is because god essentially mind controlled him into not letting them go by 'hardening his heart'.

he wasnt the kind of god you really wanted, he was more the kind of god you wanted to not piss off, and hope he would bless you, but even that was a gamble because he basically did what he wanted.

>>390119941
people bring up jobs story as a reason to be pacified in suffering. but job got to have divine intervention, and was restored and then some his blessings, something god really only did for him to show how powerful he was again.

jobs story shouldnt be taken as a moral lesson, its just god flexing his muscles. nothing more or less.
>>
>>390120306
Job's story is also its own lesson on how God promised to never strip blessings without reason again though.

But there was was a lot of flexing going on.

>even apparently lost a battle to another god
Every mention in OT is about how there are no other gods, and there is often laughing about those who pray to stone/gold/wood idols that can never be more than stone/gold/wood and never lift a finger to help.

What are you basing this on that would contradict everything else in the Bible?
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>>390120518
Remember that time Elijah went against those heathen priests? That was fun
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>>390120518
I've felt that God acknowledged other gods but reveled more on the fact that he is greater than those other gods. The Egyptians with their gods and sorcery (IIRC) were able to mimick some of the earlier plagues that God inflicted but none of the later ones. Then there's >>390120614
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>>390120856
I read somewhere that God strangled Dagon or something
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>>390120614
>>390120856
>Then there's >>390120614
I remember it. I remember they did nothing, while he gave them such a thrashing it should be illegal.

Albeit, you are right in that sorcery was always considered present and sinful in the Bible. The only time it was ever linked to a higher power (instead of just sorcery itself) is in Rev. when the Beast is granted the power to do miracles and bestow upon his followers the same.
>>
>>390120304
Those arguing in favor of the ark truly taking every animal will argue multiple things:
1) God says "kind" of animal, which doesn't necessarily mean each specific animal. It can go up as far as Genus or Family on the evolutionary scale (those the offspring are generally impotent).
2) It doesn't include insects or water beasts or plants. All could exist in the waters or on top in vegetative floats
3) It doesn't explicitly say the animals needed to be full grown! They could be "teen" animals.
4) They could be in prolonged hibernation and not require as much food
5) Animal waste could be easily flushed on a globe of water, not a problem to keep disease at bay
6) If it includes dinosaurs, there doesn't have to be all of them
7) Birds just need a place to roost

A global flood is disproven in the fossil and sedimentary record, in any case.
>>
>>390110108
MGQ
>>
>>390120518
the old testament is written in a way that occasionally implies, or could imply either other gods, or magic existing. this contradicts with other parts where, for instance in isiah god says 'I am the LORD, and there is none else, there is no God beside me: I girded thee, though thou hast not known me'

however in kings, isreal goes to fight the king of moab, winning decisvely until the king sacrifices his son to his god, which unleashes a 'indignation' onto isreal driving them out:

'Then he took his eldest son that should have reigned in his stead, and offered him for a burnt offering upon the wall. And there was great indignation against Israel: and they departed from him, and returned to their own land.'

the way this is written is such that it could be interpreted in different ways, i suppose, but to me it seems an odd loss in what should have been a decisive victory for the isrealites who had god behind them, and is never really explained.
>>
>>390121442
A more clear example could simply be between Moses and Pharoah's court mages and how Moses turned his staff into a snake, just like they all did. The deciding factor was Moses' staff/snake ate all the other snakes before Moses grabbed it by the tail and it became his staff again.
>>
>>390121442
>occasionally implies, or could imply either other gods, or magic existing
I agree with magic, but not gods. The entire point of Egypt in Genesis and later the plagues against the Pharaoh in Exodus, as well as Daniel and other Judges, is about disproving other gods. Magic, or rather sorcery, is often present - and commented on, even up to Revelations, where those who practice sorcery are not allowed into the New City.

But "gods" is something that the Bible repeatedly goes out of the way towards shitting on as not existing. Daniel, Moses, Elijah in the pic of >>390121251 - all of it about there being no other gods. Hell, there are times when Israelites rebel against God, so the Lord gladly joins the enemy side to thrash the Israelites until they repent.
>>
>>390110108
Super Smash Brothers Melee for the Nintendo Gamecube.

before i took it as autistically seriously as I do now it was still a fun game
>>
>>390110250
Dark Pit
>>
>>390121684
monotheism would have been a tough claim to make in the time the bible was written. there are certainly some parts that support that claim, but i doubt it would be so consistent. again its been a while since i read the book, but a quick google search on polytheism in the bible gives three verses right off the bat:

For [Jehovah] is the great God, and the great King above all gods (Ps. 95:3).

All the gods bow down before [Jehovah] (Ps. 97:7).

I know [Jehovah] is great, and our Lord is superior to all gods. (Ps. 135:5)

yet in isiah he claims there is no other gods, or as you say that they are false gods. being superior to is certainly a far different thing to say than 'the other gods are false'.
>>
>>390122068
>there used to be some other gods
>God made it so that there are none other than him
>>
>>390122068
those could just as easily be taken figuratively like so:
He's superior to all gods because all those other ones don't exist.
All the gods figuratively bow down before Jehovah because they're fucking lies who aren't worth shit.
great God, King above all those gods who don't exist.
>>
>>390122121
>Trying to glean logic from religious degeneracy
>>
>>390121442
>>390121684
I mean, they really shit on the idea of there being other gods. Let's consider Gideon, whose people revoked the Lord for pagan gods because their people were strong.

Gideon destroys their Ba'al alter and tears out the Asherah pole, and Gideon's father defends him with pic related. "If Ba'al's real, then let him strike Gideon down." Of course, nothing.

I'm including the Jerub-baal part because that sass is off the charts.

>>390122068
>monotheism would have been a tough claim to make in the time the bible was written
I agree. Even in Gideon's own tale, after all the lengths he goes through to disprove Ba'al and repeatedly prove the Lord, the second he dies, the people of Israel immediately go back to Ba'al.

>33 As soon as Gideon died, the Israelites prostituted themselves by worshiping the images of Baal, making Baal-berith their god. 34 They forgot the Lord their God, who had rescued them from all their enemies surrounding them. 35 Nor did they show any loyalty to the family of Jerub-baal (that is, Gideon), despite all the good he had done for Israel.

To the rest, cycle through translations and really read the quotes. For example, the literal translation of Psalms 97:7 is
>7 Ashamed are all servants of a graven image, Those boasting themselves in idols, Bow yourselves to him, all ye gods.
It's clearly ridicule and boasting, not simply an acknowledgement of their existence. Other passages also treat the "empty idols" themselves as gods - not in power or our meaning, but "your god is a powerless block of wood" to which the Lord is, of course, greater.
>>
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>>390122479
>with pic related
Woops.
>>
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>>390110713
>>390110757
>Ancient people exclude the shitty obvious fanfiction when establishing the canon of their religion
>2000 years later faggots bring it up as evidence of the character's behavior
Hey guys check out this Half Life canon I researched. It's intriguing and enlightening really.

https://youtu.be/OHxyZaZlaOs
>>
>>390122774
A better analogy would be silver age superhero comics.
>>
>>390122774
It's literally all fanfiction of older religions.
>>
>ctrl f doom
>0 results

Man, you faggot children are disappointing. Even Jesus would enjoy Doom.
>>
What are some games with a decent Leviathan?
>>
>>390113214
>that super wrong hierarchy
Lucifer was the most exalted and he was an archangel ergo top of the hierarchy is Archangel. It's not hard.
>>
>>390110108
Jordan vs Bird 1-on-1
>>
>>390123401
>the actual hierarchy is wrong because muh pop culture is filled with fucking retards that don't know a thing about angels
Lucifer is fucking medieval fanfiction, faggot.
>>
>>390110108
Crash team racing
>>
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Since this is the new religion and thinly veiled /x/ thread, let me just vent on HOW FUCKING STUPID THIS IS, I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. GOD'S SISTER?? ARE YOU KIDDING ME??
>>
>>390124063
>God is a character
>Doesn't fuck everyone's shit up
>>
>>390124118
She even reads like a donut steel Mary Sue
>Older than God and Death
>Stronger than both
>Beat up God because she got jelly he made humans and wouldn't spend time with her
I hate everything about Supernatural's despiction of angels or demons.
>>
>>390123819
>actual hierarchy
You high, m8? Number 6 isn't even a thing, nor is 5, and damned if I remember encountering 4 or 7. I remember trying to source some of these, like the ones said to be in Ephesians, and it's an absurd assumption.
>>
>>390124478
>>390124063
Without knowing a thing about what you're talking about, Nyx is sort of a big deal in Greek stuff.
>>
>>390124590
She's not Nyx, she's "The Darkness" as in, if God is The Light, then she is the Darkness before that.
>>
>>390124063
Supernatural after season 5 is shit, but Nyx in Greek myth was the primordial darkness that existed before anything. She even scared Zeus shitless.
>>
>>390124737
>She's not Nyx, she's "The Darkness"
>she is the Darkness before that

That's literally what Nyx is.
>>
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>>390124737
But God said "let there be light" not "here I am."
>>
>>390124804
Yes, but the show doesn't deal with Greek mythology, not that I recall at least since judeo-christian took over everything, and I don't think Nyx is referred to as the sister of the Christian God. Feel free to correct me though, as to not deviate from the topic.
>>
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>>390124746
>>390124804
>>390124737
Seems strange to mix Greek/Roman with an Abrahamic religion
>>
>>390124737
Isn't there a passage that said God was both the Light to guide the way and the Dark to give you shade?
>>
>>390124984
They've dealt with other mythologies before. I stopped watching after season 5, but even then they had the convention of pagan gods trying to stall the Apocalypse. I wouldn't be shocked if they just started mixing shit together so they could include a strong independent spooky eldritch womyn.

>>390125071
Abrahamic religion has been mixed with Greco-Roman religion ever since it gained traction in Rome. You know how in the past, people used to call god 'Jove'? Jove was a Roman name for Zeus. It's also where the Christian god gets his depiction as an old bearded man in the clouds flinging lightning at sinners.
>>
>>390121859
>>390118489
>>390110478
>wario
>mii fighter
>dark pit
We're talking about high school you fucking niggers, those characters are from brawl
>>
>>390125175
I know that, but there were scenes where other pantheons were their own thing, but each was vastly inferior to God. Hell, Lucifer killed all of the Norse gods, I think
>>
How did angels go from incomprehensible beings to humanoids with wings?
>>
>>390126062
Renaissance art. They do also take human form a few times during the Bible.
>>
>>390125071
God damn I want to fuck that darkness
>>
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>>390126232
If only she had more porn
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