Hello /v/, we noticed that you really enjoy our Steam™ games

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Hello again /v/, we noticed you're enjoying the cosmetic items added to Team Fortress 2™ on your Steam™ games client. I can see one in your inventory right there! How lucky!

How would you like to trade this cosmetic with others to receive one you'd enjoy even more?

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Hello /v/, we noticed you're enjoying Team Fortress 2™ and it's many new free updates, especially the cosmetics! Trading them has also become a huge commodity, so we're introducing a market.

You can now pay anywhere from one cent to several thousand dollars to purchase your favorite one. Just make sure your credit card info is on file.

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Hello there /v/, we noticed you have many cosmetic items in Team Fortress 2™, courtesy of our illustrious Mann Co.™ lotte- I mean, crate and key system. Don't you just love it?

However because trading and buying items has become so valuable, we will now require you to provide proof you own your Steam™ games client account. You do have a cell phone, right?

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Hello again /v/, are you enjoying the Steam™ games client Steam Marketplace™? It's become a very big hit, no doubt due to the many great cosmetic items available in the Team Fortress 2™ Mann Co.™ in-game store.

However due to a need for increased security, all marketplace purchases now require a 7 day waiting period before you can use them. Oh, and this extends to buying actual games as well.

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Whoops, did I say 7? I actually meant 15.

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Remember when valve made games?

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I mean 30.

Huh? What's Half-Life™? You should stop thinking so much /v/, and pick yourself up a nice crate and key from the Mann Co.™ online store in Team Fortress 2™ on the Steam™ games client.

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>>383797837

Videos games you say? I think I know one you might enjoy.

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>>383797975
Fallout is my favorite RPG series!

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Hello again /v/, remember me? We noticed that you really enjoy our Steam™ games client. You downloaded it to play the hit series Team Fortress 2™ and... Alien Swarm™.

How would you like in-game items in CS:GO™ and make your character look more unique?

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Stop.

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>>383797975
Oh yeah? Which game, fine Sir?

epic thread... NOT!

LOL