How do you get your kicks? >Use a voice changer to make my

>get my girlfriend to talk on the mic
>instant swarm of beta orbiters and friend requests
>accept them
>tease them a bit with pics of my gf
>make them buy me games
>then block them

I've been doing this for 3 fucking years. You'd think by now retards would realize buying a chick a video game isn't going to make them love you.

>>378943420
You underestimate the number of retards out there.

>>378943420
>Talking to people on mic through F13
>They're all responding, talking about what's happening
>My girlfriend is sitting next to me because she likes horrors
>Get her to say something through mic
>No response
>Tell her to ask a related question
>No response
What are they scared of

>>378943865
They are all waiting for someone to say something stupid so they can make fun of them and look alpha

>>378943203

>Find gamer couple
>Tell girl i'll wreck her pussy way better then her manlet bf ever could
>the guy always gets super upset
>girl tries to support him and ends up sounding like a retard
>make fun of both girl and guy

The guy almost always adds me and flames me, shit is so fucking funny

>win super close match in competitive overwatch
>gg ez

>>378944435
This shit is the best but I do it on ESEA CS. ez every round won with the eventual game win and you can listen to the rage when you replay the match.

>intentionally lose game
>next game my former teammates are on the enemy team
>beat them

It's kind of embarassing when I can't pull it off though

>>378943203
How could anyone be confused as to how a 10 year old could get GM in overwatch?

>>378945302
Show me your GM career profile

>gf is farming OW loot boxes for me while I'm at work
>see how proud she posts her potgs in facebook

having a gamer gf is bliss

>play for honor really badly on a shit noob account
>only for the first or second rounds
I was like that guy who would always hit home runs after the second strike

>>378945369
[TRIGGERED]

>>378945487
That does sound kind of cute, the only girl i've ever dated would rather me tie her up than play games, it's a sad {but horny} life.

>>378943203
Almost like you

>Use a voice changer to make my voice sound like a 10 year old girl
>Go into chatrooms and some sandbox games
>"Did anyone see my daddy?"
>Everyone starts adding me and I make guys jerk off to me

>>378945487
Jelly. My wife is fucking awful at vidya. She only plays super low stress stuff like animal crossing, life is strange, or
pokemon. Everthing else is too hard or stressful for her. She always cheers me on though so that's nice.

>>378945793
she plays the usual casual stuff but at least she doesn't mind when I sit at home and play vidya all the time. When I show her my autistic fort in DF she says "haha cool anon" although I know she only shees gibberish on the screen. she really cares for me and I like that

Being a smug jackass and making other people upset and angry. Sometimes all it takes is saying "ez" after winning.

File: 1488894875820.gif (1003KB, 220x220px) Image search: [Google]

1003KB, 220x220px

>lose a match hard
>it's not even close
>"gg ezpz"

you'd be surprised how many people don't pay attention to who is on their team

>>378945868
well OW is the "hardest" stuff she plays. the rest is mario kart, zelda, sims and also animal crossing and stardew valley and terraria. typical girl games.
>stressful
yep, that's what she said when she saw me playing Furi
>you only get angry anon, why do you play this?

File: 1487434249538.png (149KB, 699x909px) Image search: [Google]

149KB, 699x909px

exposing devs as the filthy jews they are.

>10-15 years ago
>downloaded cracked cs1.6
>download the most obvious aim and wallhacks
>go on to servers and kill everyone
>listen to 12 years old autistic kids in voice chat
I don't know why but I enjoyed it, I know I wasn't supposed to
And no I haven't cheated in any game since then

>>378945986
Sounds sweet, i'm glad you got it bud, one day we're all gonna make it.

File: 1478206684235.png (73KB, 242x364px) Image search: [Google]

73KB, 242x364px

>>378946092
>Playing Metal Gear Vengeance on hardest difficulty
>Fighting the senator
>Have absolutely no idea what I'm doing strategically and also have no heals
>FUUUUUCKING GAME
>anon you should stop playing this kind of games, it's unsettling when you get mad
>o ok

>>378946345
>o ok
I once punched my gf in the leg because she told me to calm down
Im such a fucking hothead and I'm super embarrassed by it after I calm down.
But she's not without guilt too. last time she loudly ranted about her "stupid 12 year old hanzo maining team mates that should go on the point"

>E.Y.E
good taste

>>378946272
I don't get this meme, everyone does jobs for money why is it bad to sing and make games for money or videos on youtube for money.

>>378946578
Yeeah it's pretty funny when they get into a game too and end up getting pissy.

>tfw no friends to fuck around with on meme games like roblox
>everyone just play cs go and rb6

>>378943203

I aimbot and wallhack in shit games I have no intention of progressing in or actually enjoying, with the sole intent of pissing off the total retards who care capable of enjoying the garbage I am ruining for them.

EX: Planetside 2, PUBG, Overwatch, MWO

>invade like an obnoxious faggot in souls
>cheese in shooters and fighting games
>wait for message, angry or not
>"stay mad"
>they only deny it and get more upset

File: 1481075080658.png (96KB, 648x657px) Image search: [Google]

96KB, 648x657px

I do challenge modes and achievement hunt in games I really enjoy. An example would be the New York Minute mode in the Max Payne series.

>>378943203
Maybe your modulator is just bad and blatant.

File: 1493906359935.jpg (27KB, 395x395px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 395x395px

>>378947610
>invade like an obnoxious faggot in souls
Loved doing that so much in early areas of dark souls 2, the only fun I've got out of the game is
killing shitty players and breaking their gear.

>>378947329
>I intentionally play games I don't enjoy just to make people upset
what a way to live

>>378948010
It's even more fun in DS3 because you are almost guaranteed to invade people with 1 or 2 or even 4 summons and then you still wreck them.

>>378947610
that's why I stop moving at all when fighting cheesers. always looks like I just went afk. and then never reply or interact with them until they kill me or leave themselves. They only have so much fun when the target doesn't respond at all.

File: image.jpg (39KB, 481x295px) Image search: [Google]

39KB, 481x295px

>>378945986
>>378946345
Damn that's cute. I'm happy for you.
>tfw no gf who cares for you
>tfw 25 kv

>>378948034
the only objective in multiplayer games is to make everybody else more upset than you

Whenever a girl speaks I start saying girls shouldn't be allowed to play video games, women's suffrage was a mistake but at least they only get 77% as many kills, and so on

Sometimes I pick a person to boo and hiss at every time they say something

Talk about how much my team sucks and I'm carrying the team even when I'm playing badly

Just generally antagonise people and act like "that guy"

And whenever I lose I always say "we won the meta". Somehow pisses people off.

>>378949006
Are you the guy posting the R6 Siege threads complaining about being banned?

>>378949339
No I don't play gaynbow sex

>>378949006
>"we won the meta"
What did he mean by this?

Calvin sounds like a screeching child and no one bats an eyelid at his idiot savant skills.

>>378948991
ur my kinda scumbag.

>>378950169
>>378947329
add me on steam i think me and u could have some fun ragin some autists.

Ggkthxbye

steam name adam

>>378949625
Metagame

Basically we lost but we played better

Ticks people right off

>>378943420
vocaroo of "gf" with speaking todays date, time and what game "she" wants or GTFO

>>378950985
Jesus that's great, I gotta use this

File: 1487950797099.jpg (18KB, 300x265px) Image search: [Google]

18KB, 300x265px

>>378947329
committing an evil to stop an even greater one, doing God's work anon, here's a (You)

>>378946345

I vocalize my frustration as well, and my wife complains about it. Then she plays a game and does the exact same thing.

>>378943203
>there are 2 things I love
>chicken and yo ass nigga was up
>why are you call me gay that'd hurtfull
>keep that up and you gonna get yo dick sucked