>plays and critiques video games for a living >manages

>>375909146
He's a critic not a pro-gamer. Why the fuck would he dedicate time to one game?

>>375909146
I'm also ranked at bronze, been playing vidya for almost 20 years

Wasn't there even an incident where he got super fucking salty at his friends while playing and started yelling orders at them?

>>375909146
His cancer probably affects him mentally.

>>375909146
That's some fluffy you got there

>>375909146
Anon want milky!

>>375909146
More like explain tits, amirite?

>>375909146
He sucks at games anon, he couldn't beat any dark souls and he said the platforming on titanfall 2's campaign was too hard of all things

>>375909208
>Why the fuck would he dedicate time to one game?

Second star prestige in OW is about 200 hours' worth of playtime.

This is the standard of players at bronze level.
https://youtu.be/bfbRXGePhfU

>>375909146
>>manages to rank in the competitive tier with little kids and people who don't
????

>>375909146
dem tiddies doe
I mean, he's not even THAT fat, but somehow managed to develop a pair of nice perky boobies
Estrogen is hell of a drug

>>375909146
>little kids and people who don't otherwise touch games at all
You mean 90% of overwatch players?

>>375909146
He's fucking retarded.

>>375911303
i always cringe when he talks about how he beat Demons and played it when it was still a niche title but he couldnt be bothered to beat any other souls game. Nigga u lying.

>>375911832
Sorry, little kids with eye-hand coordination disabilities and literal living vegetables that have attention span shorter than a goldfish. I do not expect him to be somewhat good at the game, like, on a high-plat/diamond level, but you have to play like my grandmother, who is 75, to be in bronze. He's a fucking video game critic, I expect him to at least be on average (silver/gold) ability to play video games, otherwise he's not that better the journalists that rush through games on easy and think they are knowledgeable enough to report on experience.

>>375912850
Anon, average is low plat.

>>375912593
And he outright lied about DeS' framerate to justify playing it when someone called him out on that retarded Bloodborne thing.

>>375912960
Then he should be at least high gold/low plat

>>375912985
what did he say exactly?

>>375912850

Isn't that what he does? He doesn't have enough patience to complete any games, so he calls his review first impressions and only plays the first hour of the game. I really fail to see how his opinion is of any value to anyone, but judging by his subscriber count, some people seem to care.

>>375913252
Pretty much this, they basically serve as a trailer of sorts.

>>375913182
He was streaming DaS3 and he went on a tangent about refusing to play action games at 30FPS when a viewer asked him about how DaS3 compared to BB. When someone called him on DeS, he claimed that it had an unlocked frame rate and ran "well above 30FPS in many areas". People started calling him out on this before he shut up shop and said "I'm not answering any more questions about other games on this stream".

Also he was sucking his own dick and taking credit for DaS coming to PC.

>>375913252
He thinks of himself as superior to your typical gaming press journalist, even though he hardly provides a lot of value when it comes to his opinions. The best content he provides is probably port-impressions.

>>375909146
>>375909146
still better than DPS lmao

>>375913719
What is DSP rank? Does he play on console?

>>375909146
somebody's been working out

>>375913647
kek, i can remember him taking credit for the DaS port too. You'd think now that he is literally dying he would become less stubborn and play BB, or at least try DaS on PC at 60fps.

>>375909146
theres literally thousands of totalbiscuit named accounts in bnet

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>playing overwatch
>at all
remove yourself, casual "human" waste

You literally have to try to be that bad. I'm extremely average at the game and I place gold/plat every season. Anyone who is bronze is actively trying to be that bad or just not giving a fuck about the game.

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>>375909146
>Judging someone based on their skill in a casual team-based shooter with a "press q to win" mechanic where rank and skill are determined by your team winning and not on an individual scale

>>375913898
Making a post like that with KanColle reaction image is incredibly ironic

>>375909146
Pretty much all youtubers are terrible at video games

>>375913765

DSP doesn't play any one game for long. He's going to have a shit rank in everything.

>>375913938
You can carry solo in bronze/silver if you're average

>>375913938
Judge him on his tits instead then m8

>>375913938
>there are people who still believe the "press Q to win" meme
So easy to spot someone who either sucks shit or doesn't play at all

>>375913970
He only likes it ironically so it's okay

>>375914129
Or just plays genji amirite?

>>375913938
See the video above; a player at even gold level can solo carry games at bronze.

Reminder that DSP beat a 4chan invader in Dark Souls

>>375914232
He beat a couple of guys off /dsg/ who invaded him, amusingly.

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>>375914053
>Attempt to carry team
>Control point
>Get shot up and ulti'd to death because 3/4 of the ultimates are AoE or multi-target
>Lose anyways
wow makes you think

>>375914129
>Enemy team is massing on control point/cart
>They are objectively better than out team but we have 2 ultimates up
>Use our ultimates because 3/4 of them are large ass AoEs
>TEAM KILL
>Win game

>>375914167
STILL to this day every time seagul gets 2+ kills with memeblade in zarya ult chat goes full pogchamp.

overwatch truly is the epitome of skillbased shooters.

>>375914129
Q is still a vital and core strategy for the chokepoints is OW. From beginner to pro that's how it plays out 95% of the time for the competitive gamemodes.

>>375914301
I don't think you quite realize how bad people in bronze/low silver

>>375914301
>reaction image from a new fotm anime
>/pol/ meme
>hate bandwagon
Gotta love neo/v/

Am I reading this right? Players of FPS for disabled kids having elitism? Are you clowns this oblivious?

>>375914302
>>375914301
>every ult has an enormous tell and a counter
>WAAAHHHHH THEYRE PRESSING Q TO KILL ME
Literally just get better at the game. D.Va and Rein counter most offensive ults. So do Lucio and Zen's ults.

>>375909146
G2A is so nice. Suck it, TB.

>>375914390
This
>phoneposting ironic anime memer
/v/ is so fucking bad holy shit

>>375914390
You're the neo-/v/ because hey let's face it you don't play any good games besides overwatch

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>>375914390
>implying I watch anime
>muh /pol/ boogeyman
>d-don't hate my game!

>>375914593
>ironic anime poster
Literally the worst kind of cancer on this site

>>375910101
That's why. Getting too old, man. I was usually top of the team in most FPS until my early twenties. Nearing thirty I really feel that I actually suck at a bunch of things.

>>375914471
>paying more money for a worse service
every time

>>375915625
But I don't. Not every time, but quite often it's been cheaper than anything else.

>>375915742
most games are often cheaper in other grey market sellers, that don't have as shitty of a reputation as g2a

>>375915862
They are not as big as G2A, that's why they don't. They all operate on the same principle and probably have the same sellers here and there

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>PCbro who screams for 60fps but does not really play any games

hm

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>>375915742
>>375915914
i'm not gonna bother to look for all the possible examples of games that are sold cheaper elsewhere, but seriously, consider other websites over g2a, they're really not special whatsoever
because of their popularity, they know they can get away with higher prices than other sellers

>>375909146
That's photoshopped though right? ...right?

Anyone with gyno that bad would see a doctor or at least kill themselves right?

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>Overwatch

>>375916097
>Anyone with gyno that bad would see a doctor

Maybe male breasts is his fetish.

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>>375916097
Nah.

>>375916097
>Anyone with gyno that bad

It's fatness. Guaranteed if he lost weight his titties would disappear.

>>375916656
I don't think so. He's overweight, but there's definitely breast tissue there that wont go away with weight loss.

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>ywn have TB's soft C cups

>>375916796
Someone posted a video of his fridge and it's full of junk food and cheese.

ITT: Judgmental fucks.

So, people that also live with him, his kid, his mother in law. Also, Crendor coming over as a guest, they didn't know what he liked to drink, so they bought a bunch of stuff. So they have both a kid who is extremely picky as well as being stick-thin to the point where his doctor has said to him "he needs more fat in his diet" and a fairly old woman who has kinda stopped giving a shit about how healthy the stuff she is eating is.

HURRDURR DIS IS WHY AMERICANS FAT. Wow, fuck you. You've never heard of a larder or cupboards? Yup, that would be where you store a lot of shit like carrots and potatoes, you don't need to freeze those. Jesus, he knew it was a mistake to let Crendor film this, people on the internet are fucking terrible.

>>375916878

Sauce?

>>375916306
yum, baby wants milk papa.

>>375909146
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH BABY WANT MILKY

>>375910101
I've been playing vidya for about 15-20 years and I've never managed to make it into “bronze” (equivalent) league in any video game with competitive multiplayer, even if I start playing online right away.

The most difficult game to get into was StarCraft 2 and even in that game, after beating the campaign for that and starting online multiplayer you could tell that bronze league was a special kind of stupid and it would be basically impossible to fall that low unless you're literally trying. Every bronze opponent you can beat by just walking into their base once you have a few units and killing them because they've just barely managed to make their first worker.

Seriously, bronze in any game is basically reserved for either legit 10 year old kids, people with handicaps (mental or physical), people who use the computer so infrequently that to interact with something they need to look down and physically locate the ‘E’ key, and people who are actively trolling.

>>375914301

>play against people in silver during placements this season
>they are comically horrible at positioning and aim, it's almost like I'm playing god mode on McCree and Soldier
>single-handedly stomp the first two games of placements with 15k+ damage both games
>end up getting skewed back into Plat/low-Diamond where I belong (I'm not even good)
>realize that people in Bronze are ACTUALLY worse than Silver shitters somehow

There is no excuse, being in Bronze is the equivalent of having a neurological disorder

>>375916656
he's not really that fat
it's legit breast tissue

he doesnt play games, he just complains about them
watch him play literally any game you know well, even games he claims are his "favourites", and the only things he knows about them are what people talk about online

>>375916945
>stick-thin

That's what all fatsos think about people who are normal or even slightly chubby. Why you would add fat to a diet is beyond me.

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>>375914302
>twitch chat

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*cough* Hello... it's me *hack* Totalbiscuit the Cynnical *wheeze* Brit. P-please don't *cough* buy those games from G2 *wheeze* A. Big corporate video game man *HACK* I mean, my selfless concern for the consumer, is *cough* paying for my treat *ACK* I mean, keeping me going. *cough* Please buy your PC games at *wheeze* full $60 retail price. *COUGH* Do it... do it for me. *vomits blood*

>>375913938
>t.bronze like tbiscuit

>>375918094
gyno removal surgery ?

>call yourself cynical
>don't be cynical
what did he mean by this?

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>>375918250
>call yourself a brit
>move to US at the first opportunity and live there
>only hang out with Americans
>don't give a shit about British matters like the Brexit, but treat your wife like a traitor for voting for the wrong guy in the US election

kek

>>375909146
how am I sure that this is the real totalbiscuits?

>>375916082
>nier automata is cheaper on ps4 than pc
Is this the time to shine?

>>375909146

>This fat fuck gets cancer
>Survives

WHAT
THE
FUCK

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Jokes-aside, is TB legitimately an aspie?

>>375915401
He's a video game enthusiast, it's his job to be at least decent. You have other priorities, that's okay, you don't have to spend all your free time on videogames, he, however, does not have the privilege to be bad. Because if he's bad at playing videogames then he's a bad critic, it's like a movie critic who watches movies in fast-forward.

>>375916945
I know that comment, it's from a fridge video where he has like 15 different cheeses in his fridge

>>375909146
How can you be an adult and care about Overwatch?

I admit, I played it when it came out and made it to rank 75 first season, but Jesus Christ, grow up. The skill ceiling is beyond ridiculous and the LGBT multiculti propaganda beyond blatant.

>>375918515
What's the point of calling yourself a brit if you are just gonna hang out with brits.

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>>375923034

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>main hanzo and mccree
>mid-plat

I consider myself to be relatively mediocre at the game, but it blows my fucking mind at how people can be this bad.

>>375922180
Holy shit, he's the ultimate fedora lord.

>>375911416
You still haven't answered my question. Why would he dedicate 200 hours to a single multiplayer game and what relevance does that have to him as a critic?

>>375911416
Overwatch has been out for nearly a year.
200 hours over the course of a year is nothing.

>>375923245
>---k that noise
What a fucking child.

jim sterling is a better totalbiscuit in every aspect

>>375923663
They are both complete shit, but at least TB doesn't force you to see his ugly face dressed like a retard in front of the camera to watch his videos.

>>375923412
They are ranked that low because they legit cannot play any champion effectively. I'm mid plat now and I am fucking garbage at aiming. I play characters like Junkrat, Symmetra, and Torb. The biggest thing to remember in cuckwatch is that the enemy team is usually fucking retarded and will ignore you if you sneak up on them.

>>375923882
>hurr style over substance
you are a degenerate and you should promptly kill yourself

>>375923663
>creates his own drama and makes video after video on it
>better

>>375924036
>The biggest thing to remember in cuckwatch is that the enemy team is usually fucking retarded and will ignore you if you sneak up on them.

Wouldn't have gotten a teamwipe with high noon otherwise.

even full stacks in calibration are hilariously bad

>>375924052
>substance
>implying either of them bring up actual points other than whining

>>375922726
Not making excuses for him. I am just mildly annoyed by getting worse myself. Maybe I was always bad though and the matchmaking just got better.

>>375923470
He already dedicated 200 hours, by that time you kind of supposed to know the basics.

>what relevance does that have to him as a critic?

For me it undermines his authority on a range of games. If he's in a league with people having absolutely no grasp or awareness about the game even after playing one of the most casual games for 200 hours, then I cannot be sure his ability is enough to judge multiplayer competitive games at all. I have no issue if someone, who only plays grand strategy games, happens be in bronze, that's not why I watch him. I would not have issue with TB being in bronze if he only played like 12 hours, he might not be an FPS enthusiast so it can take a while for a guy like him to acclimate. However, in this case he played long enough to be at least on sub average level, not in complete trash. He's a variety reviewer and analyst, it's his duty to be passionate and knowledgeable on things he talks about. And he talks about OW alright.

>>375910187
Chemo brain is a thing. To say nothing of possible nerve damage. He used to be ranked pretty high in SC 5 or so years ago.

>>375924539
I think it's more about mentality of getting into something than actual skill. Sure, to be on top you have to practice and you have to be at least somewhat talented, but most people are not.To be better than average you just need to treat your game more seriously, at least that's how I suddenly became a decent CSGO and BF4 player. It doesn't mean that you should not have any fun with the game along the way (I play for fun and feelings of accomplishment after all), just the fact that your end objective should be winning the game. Some people here have an issue with that though, but that's why they are bad. The idea that playing to win = no fun is retarded.

>>375924575
Not him, but this is kind of a thing that TB essentially weasels around. His whole WTF is? shtick is that those are no reviews, they're just him playing the game for a bit and showing off options menus. He lives of having less than average knowledge of anything he reports on, yet nonetheless somehow considers himself to be the purveyor of educated opinions.

>>375925129
I get that, though it's mostly mechanical issue at this point. Bad aim, bad reactions, that sort of stuff. Feels like it was better before, but maybe I'm just more self-aware now.

>launch game
>fiddle with graphics settings
>watch the frame rate for a few minutes, cry if it's less than an arbitrary value
>close game
this is how TB "critiques" games
it's the mindset of some guy who wasted 2000 dollars on an overkill rig to play the hot AAA games that he doesn't even like

>>375913647
>Also he was sucking his own dick and taking credit for DaS coming to PC.
oh please, what a delutional retard
the japs have slowely been porting shit to steam when they realized it's easy and the money is decent for how little work you need to put in

>>375909146
>self-proclaimed voice of PC gaming
>well below average skill level across the board
>openly admits to almost exclusively playing mobile games

How is he even still a thing? Does he even have an audience beyond the utter morons over at /r/pcmasterrace?

>>375925410
If you gamed on PC, wouldn't you be interested to see if the game ran well? Watch his Dawn of War 3 video. Very little is devoted to graphics and settings.

>>375926108
Literally only because the one thing he cares more than settings sliders are the sliders for customising space marine dicks.

>>375925876
>thinks that clash royale is a skill-based game

>>375926359
Retard.

https://youtu.be/FL3ZdFepBHY

>>375926489
Yes, you are!

>>375909146
TB has and always will be a cunt with an over inflated ego. I've been aware of this faggot since he ran WoW Radio into the ground. Just trash, with trash onions and only proves American's with low IQ will listen to anyone with a British accent and think they're smart.

>>375909146
He's got the kind of autism that makes it impossible to do anything without sperging out, he's playing with a handicap dude.
>>375910174
Yep. Also one where he laughed so hard he was hospitalized due to bruising his lung against his ribcage. Dude has fucking problems.

>>375909146
What he has played as much as me and he's a bronze? Wew i'm a high diamond/master shitter.

>>375920746
Where u see ps4? Your eyes cant see more than 720 pixels?

>plays and critiques video games for a living
Exactly, the main word there being "critiques", he doesn't have the time to get autistically good at every game he plays.

He talks about this constantly.

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>>375923245
GamerGate fucking ruined everything.

>>375929001
John Kelly fucking hates GamerGate, dude.

>>375928741
>200 hours of gameplay
>still in the lowest tier of skill
he's lying to you and himself, he does about 3 hours of actual work a day then plays whatever he wants under the guise that he's still doing work

>>375910174
anyone got a video of this?

>>375909146
who cares? you're just as pathetic as people who are avid fanboys of random nobody e-celeb

I'm guessing if I had chemotherapy I wouldn't be very good at games

>>375930691
how big do you think your mammaries would be if you got chemo?