If you could pick a Hollywood celeb to be your father and raise

>>87211572
Probably like Sean Connery or Clint Eastwood, but Eastwood's wife and daughters are a complete wreck so if I had to deal with them I don't know if it would be worth it.

>>87211572
Dan Schneider.

>>87211616
ugh I bet the Eastwood household is really toxic with all their republicanism

Simon Pegg

>>87211572
lmao do you want your soul and body both sold to a death cult centered around the hoarding of wealth by its leaders?

>>87211685
oh me too, what a coincidence, we must be brothers! we can tag team iCarly or whatever shit he made.

>>87211616
Nah,Eastwood or Connery would be god tier to meet but he would suck as a father because nothing you do will ever impress him because he has done it all. Also they would fuck your girlfriends.

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/thread

The only correct response.

>>87211795
>wanting a man baby father unironically

Kek

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>>87211997

>>87211572
He looks a bit like the retarded freak I used to live next to as a kid. This takes me back to my most disturbing childhood memory.

>be 8/9 years old
>to the right of my house lives a divorced prick whose kids visit once every few months
>his FAS daughter is sort of friendly but kind of dumb
>his 10 year old son is a mentally challenged chubby midget and super violent (although he very much wanted to be my friend. I mostly acted friendly towards him and that kept him from biting me like he did with most kids on the street)
>to my left lives another divorced guy whose kids come over more often
>he has a son of about 11, a daughter of 9, and some disfigured 7 year old boy who was only physically challenged
>go over to the house on my house's left one day
>the 7 year old and FAS girl are playing in the living room
>dad is nowhere to be seen
>ask where the others are (the 11 year old was my best friend of the bunch)
>"they're upstairs"
>go upstairs
>hear crying
>enter the kids's bedroom
>the retarded freak is somehow raping the 9 year old girl with his 10 year old penis
>the 11 year old guy is sitting in a chair and is watching his sister getting raped
>the 11 year old is giving the retard directions
>walk away without them noticing me
>stop hanging out with those kids
>never mention it to anyone until this post

>>87212011
>this triggers the beta male

Jesus this was easier than I thought.

>>87211748
0/10

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>>87212048
>not wanting four mothers

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/thread

Would be a great father.

>>87212040
Moar!

>not choosing keanu
you inhuman monsters

>>87212138
The disfigured 7 year old used to eat any insect/arachnid/bug you gave him. He'd eat worms to freak people out, and I even saw him eat a daddy long legs once the absolute madman. Funnily enough he was also highly intelligent and a violin prodigy.

>>87212171
>wanting a father with autism

>>87211572
hopefully blood related right?

>>87212101
See
>>87212097

>>87211966
>>87212203
These are the only acceptable answers.

>>87212040
You should track them down on facebook and ask them about that day. They have a lot of answering to do.

Tom Hanks

mel gibson

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>>87211572

>>87212494
>tfw someone posted a pic of that kid a few days before this stuff happened and I posted "hey is he going to be a trap?"
oh fuck what did I do

>>87212494
I don't get the controversy.

If a girl dresses up as Hans Solo it's "awesome" and the dad "wins at parenting".

Boy dresses up as a female superhero and it's the end of civilization.

Why the hypocrisy?

>>87212922
Its disgusting. And Harley Quinn is a shit character.

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>>87211572
how much of a pleb are you

>>87213034
That doesn't explain anything

>>87212922
Han Solo is a lovable rogue with a heart of gold who turns out to be a good friend and a positive rolemodel.

Harley Quinn is a mentally damaged woman in an abusive relationship with a mad man who's been redesigned to be a whore in recent years.

I wonder why children imitating one is worse than the other.

>>87211685
underrated post

>>87213343
So if he had gone as Scarlet Widow, it would have been fine?

>>87213386
it would have been better yeah

>>87213527
Would it have been fine?

DON'T REPLY TO THIS THREAD! IT WAS OBVIOUSLY MADE BY SCIENTOLOGY!

>>87213641
to me personally no

i don't think you should put your son in sexualized girly costumes

>>87213715
But putting girls in masculine costumes is fine?

>>87213064
Who is the mother then? A Kennedy or a housekeeper?

>>87213773
well what is a "masculine" costume? probably akin to more normal clothes as opposed to something fetishy like harleys tiny short shorts and black widows skintight bodysuit spandex

>>87213708
>wanting to be an oven dodger

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>>87213064
I thought of him, but only if it morphs my DNA to be his actual son. If he was just raising me as I am, I would literally never be able to measure up. Being a manlet raised by Arnold would probably fuck your self-image up even worse than just being short. Plus, he never struck me as a great father. His illegitimate kid is the most like him, and that's likely because he was so desperate to be acknowledged as his son he started following his fitness footsteps.
As a manlet, being raised by Cruise would be the optimal situation for me, minus the Scientology.

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The only correct answer.

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>>87212922
It's just more evidence that Schreiber fucks his kid

>>87213845
i'd be the bastard child of a spic house keeper before i was a kennedy to be perfectly honest

>>87212040
Plz stop posting this ok every board

>>87214096
If you can pump your kids full of sex hormones, you can pump them full of dick, you intolerant Trumptard.

>>87214176
those are eyes that have seen some shit. afraid and tired but unflinching and strong

>>87211572
William Shatner

>>87211572
Aidan Gillen

>>87213845
when Arnolds your father, does mother even matter?

jack nicholson

>>87212494
>>87213708
>>87214061
>>87214096
>>87214628
so you all want a Jewish father?

>>87215168
Nothing wrong with that unless your a stormweenie

>>87211572
Can I be raised by a single mother Kate Beckinsale? PLEASE?

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> tfw you will never run away from cops with kevin costner

tom cruise seems cool but its no doubt a facade to cover up all his scientogy/hollywood elite evils

>>87211685
Holy Kek

>>87211572
bruce lee

>>87211685
fpbp

>>87212922
its faggotry, if you allow this sort of things there wil be all types of faggets and gays and shit walking around, im from beunos ares and i say kill them all

>>87211572
Because he's clearly on some kind of contract with the scientologists to shill their religion and i could probably get grandfathered in to the upper circle.

>>87212203
this is objectively correct

>>87211572
Say what you will about Cruise but he always brings 110% into production, never phones it in

Alec Baldwin.

Cruise has and will continue to be /our guy/

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Pic related

>would keep the estrogen, flouride and other chemicals out of your food and water, ensuring you don't become an emasculated amalgamation of a man by your late teens
>would ensure a optimum diet with supplements
>bbqs, shooting, camping, fishing, lifting
>in-depth knowledge of crazy ass conspiracies

>>87212171

Yeah Keanu has a great history with having children

>wanting to be raised a scientologist

NOT

WORTH

IT

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This guy would be