>"Welcome to holodeck 3" >"Please input

>Computer, load scenario: House Party
>Load party people program, set excitement levels to Good Time.
>Initiate dabbing subsequence.
>Set body parameters to Pickle

simulate the events of the eleventh of september 2001 if the group responsible for the attacks weren't terrorists but were instead rape gangs

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>>86103855
>Computer, generate a universe where I'm not a 27 year old kissless virgin
>Unable to comply with your request ... virgin

>"Computer, access holodeck program "Toby the Targ", select character Toby the Targ and transfer to new file"
>"Computer, increase size of Toby the Targ by 5000%."
>"Computer, access personnel record of Federation Ambassador Lwaxana Troi and extrapolate holo-image"
>"remove breasts from Ambassador Troi and enlarge to the proportionality of Toby the Targ, and affix to the character's underbelly"
>"Computer, load reference of fecal matter from the garbage disposal pattern buffers of Bellana Torres from any startdate corresponding with Neelix's personal logs in which he mentions his cooking of 'Talaxian Enchiladas' and place a volume of 2000 metric tonnes into the breasts of Toby the Targ"
>"Computer, recreate a plexiglass model of Federation Commander William T. Riker's mouth, rescale so that it may hold the volume of fecal matter, and place under Toby the Targ"
>"Computer, begin playback of 'Adagio for Strings' by Samuel Barber"
>"Computer, engage a site to site transport of Seven of Nine to the bottom of the plexiglass mouth, disengage safety protocols, lockout holodeck two and begin to lactate the breasts at a rate of 2 gallons per second on my mark."
>"Mark."

>>86103855
I always felt holodeck should never be installed or at least tuned down to save electricity.

Just how much electricity and space do you need for entertainment Jesus.

>>86103855
>Computer recreate the events that took place in rape cave 64166 on Turkana IV in 2352.

>computer, generate a universe where a holodeck is not possible

>>86103855
>>86103855
>send emergency call all officers of jewish descent.
>ignore all voice commands exept mine
>once guests arrive run barclay_auschwitz_05.holo
>safety protocols off.

i wonder how they got away with that episode

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>>86103855
>Computer, run the Hitler program again

>>86104143
I'm sure they did when they needed to, if they could anyway. Turning the damn thing off did seem to be a big problem. How often do you turn off your computer?

computer, gimme 100 lactating christina hendrickses

>>86103993
You forgot to load specify that it was a 2011 scenario, dummy

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>>86104588

>>86104462
>safety protocols off.

Finally this. 8 posts it took to get this. /tv/ is slipping.

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>>86103855
computer generate a milky skinned brunette with an insatiable sex drive and expandable bodyparts

>computer, simulate the gassing of 65,000 bodies a day for two years straight in a brick building without leaving a trace of cyanide
>sorry captain, does not compute

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>Computer, generate the 20th century Earth restaurant Red Lobster
>The only other person there is Counselor Troi
>Make her breasts 200% bigger
>She wants nothing more than to hand feed me an endless supply of Cheddar Bay biscuits
>Increase belt strength to maximum
>Disengage safety protocols

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So what exactly was program 9?

>>86105199
Sexual intercourse in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation with Counselor Troi

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>>86103855

Computer, reroute the holodeck's primary power coupling through the phase inducers to create a complete holographic field on every deck. Create multiple holographic Lieutenant Worfs in a full state of rage-lust, with extra genital barbs, one for each person on the Enterprise. Program the Worfs to view any crew member or guest as Wesley Crusher. Disengage safety protocols.

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>Computer, create a perfect simulation of the early-21st century anonymous imageboard 4chan, with the caveat that every post I make receives 100 replies, (You)s colloquially, or your mother will die in her sleep tonight. Reading this negates all your immunities

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>>86105493

>>86105237
>live a full life on the holodeck with wife of choice and designing your own family and home
leaving the holodeck would just be going to work

>>86105180
good way to go

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>>86105180
Cheddar Bay biscuits

>>86105493
nah

>>86104024
>inb4 nothing happens because the rape gangs are too busy raping

>>86105493
Fuck.

>Computer, load Ridley Scott program
>Disengage safety protocols

>computer, show me program Raimi Spiderman-Zeta-Kai
>Disengage safety protocols

>>86105493
Cunt

>>86105493
(You)

>>86105180
>Increase belt strength to maximum
That got me