>What if Superman was evil? We'd need a team to take

waller was an affirmative action hire

Probably the only thread on here in months that's made me laugh.

I've never understood this meme. The Suicide Squad clearly prove themselves capable when they stop not one, but two world-ending mystical super villains.

>>85347257

Superman could decapitate the whole team in 2 seconds

>>85346762
Was the spics power considered magic? Bevause its the only other weakness of Superman besodes kryptonite

>>85347289
Could he? Especially with the Enchantress there and presumably under Moon's control now, since Supes is weak to magic.

>>85347289
Harley kicks Superman's ass all the time

they cant make a superman busting team because they would forever live in his shadow

>>85346762
women tend to be less rational when making decisions

>>85347342

His heat vision would wipe out the whole team

>>85347257
They only won through the power of friendship.

>>85347257
And none of those mystical supervillains would have caused a rucckus if the suicide squad had never existed.

I would made Waller clean the toliets of the office for a month just for that bkunder.

>>85346762

Enchantress alone could subdue Superman and the others, given the proper tools to deal with Superman, could do it too, like Batman.

Diablo is distraction due to his powers, Harley Quinn is distraction due to her unpredictability, Deadshot could be given kryptonite bullets and smoke grenades (like batman used), Boomerang could be given kryptonite stuff to throw, Croc can contain a weakened Superman affected by kryptonite, Slipknot as well, Flagg is intel like Batman and Katana can cut him with magic sword.

>>85347444
Or Superman could just heat vision them from orbit.

>>85347385

He can't see through lead and is weak to magic and kryptonite. There are plenty of ways they could trap Superman, provided Superman doesn't know about them.

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>>85346762

>we need a team of freaks to stop Superman
>anyone can walk up to him with a piece of kryptonite and then stab him in the heart

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>>85347444
>Boomerang could be given kryptonite stuff to throw

>>85347444
Fucking Waller herself could throw the kryptonite then.

>>85346762
>Democrats

>>85347562

I agree he's a dumb character, but I didn't create him. Those are his powers, man.

>>85347518

Only if he knows about them and wants to kill them. They also have to be in the open.

See >>85347521

>>85347564

I just laughed really hard picturing that.

I'm actually still laughing right now.

>>85347564

She's old and fat.

>>85346762
Well Enchantress could probably kill him

>>85346762
>What if Superman was evil?
Kryptonite bullets bitch.

>>85346762
>Make a Suicide Squad film
>Don't make it a Dirty Dozen kinda film, where the country where Superman rescued Lois and caused an international crisis is preparing some sort of retaliaton against the US, and only the Squad could get in without the US goverment getting in trouble.

It's like they're looking for ways to fuck things up.

>>85347350
Only in the retarded Injustice verse.

Hey here's a simple fix for this shitty movie.
Waller assembles the Squad to kill Superman. They are all villains to give the government plausible deniability. Deadshot is the only one privy to the plan and is given a kryptonite bullet for Superman.
Halfway through the film Superman dies and while they sit around figuring out what to do, Enchantress escapes.

>>85347646
And every other single one of these is equivalently useless when you consider supermans level of strength, speed, manoeuvrability and endurance. Either any goon throwing kryptonite is enough to stop superman, in which case the suicide squad would be effective, but so would Paul Blart mall cop, or the goon would not be effective because you take into account supermans speed etc., at which point none of the suicide squad even vaguely manage to reach his power level on any measurable scale

>>85348029

They should have just made it about dealing with the Joker. Assault on Arkham, a shitty animated movie, had a better premise than this film that tried to make it epic by having a world ending threat.

>>85348065

Again, they have the expertise to, as a team, create a trap for Superman, PROVIDED Superman doesn't know about their existance. Only if they went head-on against Superman would that scenario of yours make sense.

>>85348126
They just wanted to copy GOtG

>>85348029
>Hey, let's assemble a team of mostly superhuman criminals and murderers to kill the guy that saved our planet for absolutely no reason
>Great idea, Waller. I just have a feeling you can get us exactly the people we need for the job

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>>85347076
Criminally underrated

>>85348366
Agreed.

>>85347948
this, seriously

should've pitched the skwad as their own black-ops team, with even more deniability than the usual covert operation. and not this bullshit of "we need something to deal with a superman 2.0"

>>85348288
The entire story is predicated on what if Superman went rogue.
He's still pretty much an unknown and the government would at least have a contingency for someone like him, doubly so after the Washington bombing.

>>85346762
>Batman is the one who catches Deadshot in the first place
>he gets the drop on him
>has the element of surprise
>Deadshot somehow gets the upper hand
>only reason Batman isn't killed is because Deadshot's daughter stopped him

This is completely ignoring the fact that Batman attacked a man Christmas shopping with his daughter in a dark alleyway, despite all of his hangups about that exact situation.

>>85348783
How about instead of hiring some third rate criminals the government could ask The Flash? I mean they know he's around and that he is powerful.
Asking criminals to do it is just plain retarded. Or hell, do some research and look around to find civillians who may have powers. I am sure there are at least one or two walking around. You wouldn't even have to give them bomb collars. Just ask them if they want to serve their country and if that doesn't work, give them money.

>>85347076
Oh no you dinnit

>>85348923
Their criminality would make it seem legitimate that they would try to kill Superman.
The Flash wouldn't do it seeing as he's a hero, and using civilians negates the premise of the film.

>>85346762
Superman is vulnerable to magic. The witch chick and Diablo could theoretically beat him, if this version of Superman weren't an unstable murderer.

>>85348923

Did you forget the part where she had files on the Flash and Aquaman? She was probabyl going to try to recruit them next.

>>85348869
Not aware of any hangups Batman has about Christmas shopping with a daughter, so maybe you didn't mean to say "exact"?

>>85349038
>Hey Flash, we just want you to know that we are not sure if Superman will always stay friendly to us. So if push comes to shove, it would be nice to know that you protect humanity
Oh yeah, I am sure Flash will not see the logic behind that statement.
>>85349120
And somehow, it was more important to recruit Harley Quinn before these two. I mean I get why Diablo or even Deadshot are in the team. They are not weak. But being a slut is not a superpower. And neither is throwing boomerangs or tying knots really well.

>>85349231
Harley Quinn was already in prison.

>>85349271
>Alright, I need to form a baseball team
>I have these people who would make great players, too
>Hey, there is this bum who always steals trash. I guess I should ask him first, even though he's constantly drunk/on drugs since he's already near the field!

>>85347076
fpbp

>Oh boy, we need to prepare in case an evil Superman comes in.
>So let's get together these bunch of nobodies who all got blown the fuck out by Batman at some point.
Seriously, what the fuck.

>>85349556
The plot makes no fucking sense

>>85349231
>if push comes to shove
heh I'm pretty sure The Flash only pushes people.

>>85346762
The guy that can shoot very well was also undercover as a fish out of water,team him up with the guy that can swim(yet is too large to fit in most underwater inner-city water ways) and you got yourself something.

Can we all just agree that 99% of DC comics are intensely stupid and the DCEU has the same ratio of idiocy to quality?

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>>85347076

>>85349556
Well, captain boomerang did subdue the flash, tie him to a giant rocket boomerang, and send him into orbit.

It's why the flash didn't just run in and cause the enchantress to cease to exist.

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>>85350071

>>85348869
Asshole Batman is the best Batman imo. You sounds like the geeks whining about him shooting people.

>>85347342
>Supes is weak to magic.
I don't remember anything about that in MoS or BvS.

>>85348869
Did he really have the upper hand? I don't remember.

>>85350264
Because there is no magic in either one of those. But in Superman and Justice League of America canon, Supes is weak to magic.

>>85348126
Yeah but this version of The Joker is just a gangsta wigger. Nothing threatening about him. Heath Ledger was actually smart and outsmarted everyone on multiple occasions. This new faggot has literally 0 chance against Batman, let alone Superman or something.
And if he does, DC made themselves completely unbelievable.

>>85350310
Oh, ok. I suppose he has to be weak against something. Will be interesting to see if he is in films.

>>85347076
well she did fuck up bad with the whole enchantress/hiring crackheads/being a stupid asshole deal

>>85350353
>>85350310
He isnt weak to magic. He just doesnt have aby special resistance to magic. Thrn again if your magic is juat conjuring fireballs then it wouldnt scratch him because its just fire. If on the other hand your magic was some sort of hex or soul rending attack, it'd affect him same as anyone else.

>>85350574
So he's still a Mary Sue then.

>>85350353
I seem to remember in some of the animated features Supes getting slapped around by magic. I think in the comics Aquaman put a hurt on Supes with his trident, something to do with magic. Been a long time, tough to remember the details.

>>85350574
He's just as weak to magic as anyone else is, which means he's weaker to magic than he is to conventional things like bullets or blunt impact.

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>>85347444
You're a fucking idiot

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>>85346762

Yeah, they really fucked up on the justification for the SS. Though they also fucked up the entire plot to be honest; would have been so much simpler if they had just boiled it down to the Joker getting his hands on some top secret military hardware (possibly reverse engineered kryptonian tech?) and the squad being put together to take him down/reclaim the tech, while allowing the government plausible deniability. Would even explain why Harley, whose chief skills are acrobatics and being crazy, is included in the squad.

But nah, we need someone to fight superman and the villain is someone no one outside of the fanbase has heard of who can summon targets for the squad to shoot at.

What a fucking trainwreck of a film. An Oscar for makeup? Fuck off.

>>85350612
Nope.

>>85350612
yeah hes pretty broken. Although in some incarnations hes still limited by the whole leaping a building in a single bound power set he originally had. At which point there can be actual conflict. The main point of his character should always be his morals and inspiring nature. Hes Clark Kent not Superman. Whereas Bruce Wayne is just a mask for Batman.

>>85350687
Thats what I said, just with more typos.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PMNFaAUs2mo

Perfect skit explaining in detail every logical fallacy regarding this garbage and is funny enough to actually justify the movie being made in the first place.

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>>85350815

>>85350612

You don't know what you're talking about, do you?

Go back to tv tropes.

>>85350326
Wigger joker is left alone because he's a brainwashed robin. Heat legend joker did it between tdkr and mos.

>>85348869
people that were molested as children often dress as a bat and attack random strangers as part of a sadosexual power fantasy.

like batman does.

>>85348183

>a trap

yeah, a kryptonite rope trap deployed by boomerang and then shot with a (kryptonite) bullet to activate while Superman is distracted by some mexican fireworks

>>85347444
>plan boils down to "throw kryptonite at him"
I assume the US has an army full of people capable of throwing things, yes?

>>85351078
I was in the Air Force, seems like the Air Force would be better suited to throw things. Or drop them. Hit me up if you can find some kryptonite, we'll work something out. Were you when heat legend die?

>>85347312
She wouldn't have known that.

Superman is also basically a speedster, so he could literally subdue them before they even had time to react. Superman shouldn't really interact with other comic book characters apart from his own desu, he just makes them look pathetic. Even batman

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>>85350612
Magic varies in interpretation. If magic is elemental based like earth, fire, wind, water, and lightning then he will be resistant to it because the only magical thing about those just the CONJURING but not the element itself. Some magic only just gives people superhuman physical abilities like Juggernaut, The Wrecking Crew, and Thor. Superman can resist all physical attacks even of that physical threat is CONJURED by magic. What Superman cannot resist magically is pure energy of magical origin like Arcane, hex, illusions, incantations, charms, and spells. He would be completely vulnerable to Harry Potter, Voldermort, Dr Strange, Dr Fate, Brother Voodoo, Odin, Spawn, and Ghost Rider.

Superman's abilities are still limited to the laws of physics. Any magic that can bend the laws of physics or are not based on them can hurt superman like a normal human.

>>85351234
Superman needs to concentrate to get fast reflexes. He can still be surprised.

>>85349556
Captain Boomerang got his ass kicked by Flash, which is less embarrassing.

>>85351260
Mainly the magic that can penetrate Supes' biomatrix is what he's vulnerable to, which is dependent on frequencies or origin.

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>>85351381
If that's the case than this should make him vulnerable to all psychings, poisons, toxins, and cosmic attacks.

Poison Ivy once took control of superman with plant toxins she created just for him. How she put it inside him I don't remember. Beings with Cosmic Energy can defeat superman. Cosmic energy is technically elemental but foreign to earth like red sun radiation is foreign to earth but it is a natural wave length frequency of the universe that gives Supers a tummy ache. That means Silver Surfer, Thanos, Ronan the Accuser, Nova, Darkseid, Celestials, Phoenix and anyone holding a cosmic cube, infinity stone, or M'Krann crystal can defeat him. Supes physics are limited to Earth's yellow sun wave length frequencies. Anyone with foreign wave length frequencis or anyone that can manipulate molecules, matter/energy conversion, or change wavelengths is a threat to him.

>>85352392
Miss me with that gay shit, holmes

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Pretends to openly hate white men in hopes that this will boost his worth enough for a woman to ever actually touch his lard buried pee pee

>>85347342
If Harley with a shit-tier sword can hit enchantress then Man of Murder can fuck her up easy

>>85350574
>>85350612
The stupid amount of Mary Sues is why dcue lost every single battle and the war against Marvel.

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>>85347289
If he'd decapitated literally the one guy Lex asked him to, he'd have *been* in Task Force X.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtm5nBuFlmY

P.S. Lex *is* the A.R.G.U.S. project.

>>85347444
Because they wouldn't just make a kryptonite cannon. Rofl

>>85346762
dumb NIGGER bitch murdered her coworkers once she got rescued.hang her.

>>85346762
>a guy who shoots normal handguns really well
>implying he couldn't use kryptonite bullets

I dont get it. What happened to this movie. Look at the first trailer at comic con

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLLQK9la6Go

I mean tonally this is so different from the final product. This is really moody and interesting and yet the movie was campy and jokey

>>85353448
Because the other trailer was campy and jokey and audiences liked it so they had the company that edited the Bohemian Rhapsody trailer recut the movie.

>>85351346
Captain boomerang kicking flash's ass and tying him to a rocket powered boomerang and sending said boomerang and flash into orbit is DCEU canon.

>>85353557
no it isn't.
neck.
shave it.

>>85353434
Were four movies in and no one has even thought of kryptonite bullets yet.

>>85353613
Yes it is. It's in suicide squad. It's the entire reason captain boomerang is on the squad at all.

>>85353557
no it isn't.
neck.
shave it.

>>85353630
you're 18+ and haven't though about killing yourself yet?
you're point?

>>85353553

Audiences didnt like the original trailer?

>>85346762

She was winding them up. She tried this before but got shot down. She just wants a gang of criminals and metas as a black ops team to do whatever she wants

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>>85353630
>he doesn't even know why Bruce didn't make them

kek

>>85353747
Bruh, it's all been very well publicized. Please don't look to me for all the answers. Thanks in advance.

>>85350018
t. reddit