'Star Wars The Last Jedi' Will Introduce The Porgs

>>85222380
This will be kino if they also have their own funny quips.

>>85222380
watch 'em babble in minion-speak. calling it now.

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Do you think the normies have even the faintest idea of what's coming.

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>>85222380
>They can fly

>>85222380

So they're bringing in the yalasamari or whatever from Thrawn books, force trees and all sorts of other bs and acting like they're doing new shit. sweet I love something old, something new,

>>85222380
awww they're adorable!

>>85222489
Im curious
At first, the conversation will be drowned out by shills trying to claim how great it is that Anakin's been retconned from being the chosen one and how great it is that Rey is basically a God
But the barriers already broke with MaRey-Sue. Normies will be shitposting within days that it's stupid that the force is a tree. Facebook will be full of memes taking the piss

But the question is whether or not it will be in good jest (ie. "we love it but it's stupid") or actually critical (ie. "what the fuck disney? bring back lucas")

Will be interesting at least

>>85222570
YSALAMIR CAGE CONSTRUCTING

>>85222380
>porglets
Kek

star wars is dead

>>85222609
Quick rundown on the tree?

>>85222681

>>85222681
Force tree made the force and gave it to a boy and girl. The boy falling to the darkside killed the girl. Snookie is the boy while marey sue is the reincarnation of the girl.

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>Disney sees that Baby Groot is loved by audiences and sells over a billion in merchandising
>Disney looks over at Despicable Me's minions and sees that the movies/merchandise make billions
>Disney inserts little, "cute" animals with unnecessarily prominent roles and screentimes in order to emulate their own previous properties and the competition for the sale of toys and to generate larger family audiences for more revenue

>>85222773
Wait I thought the force was a Chi allegory. The whole life itself creates it thing.

So many disney movies have a character like this now, some dumb ass cute super epic and funny character to sell merchandise
BB8
K2SO
Groot
These shits

>>85222773
Thanks, anon. That's terrible. Is that some old EU fanwank, or a new thing that leaked?

>>85222849
FUCK that, man. The future is FEMALE.

>>85222804
>company repeats business practices that have worked in the past for profit

OH MY FUCKING GOD LIFE AS WE KNOW IT IS OVER

hahahahha I love seeing Stars Wars die a slow and painful death while its manchild fans try their hardest to cope with how bad it is and convince themselves over and over that it's not that bad

>>85222380
Well, it's one less nostalgia-bait critter, I guess.

>>85222873
Something like that in the cgi clone wars. Except it was an old man instead of a tree and anakin stopped the two kids from killing each other. That's what I heard, haven't seen it myself.

>>85222849
It was

but the force is female now so who cares

>>85222380
>that mouth
Luke chose the island of flying fleshlights

>>85222849

Which is why people are having a pre-emptive shitfit over it.

They're changing what the force is again and they're moving away from something that was basically an eastern idea about an energy field that binds all life together, and lucas used a science-y macguffin to tie together even more and they're doing their own macguffin and something simple about trees and i'm not sure in reincarnation story is true but if it is, people are going to throw a massive shitfit.

It's going to be beautiful. They hated midichlorians. this is going to shit so hard on the OT that a collective blast of rage will erupt around the internet.

>>85222865
I don't get it. Why are dumb animals going to be prominent in a Star Wars movie? I don't get it. The Ewoks were intelligent, at least.

I don't get it

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Rey will say "They're so cute!" or something and then Luke will say something like "They're super venomous!" or "They're delicious" or something retarded because I'm a hack screenwriter and that's what I'd do.

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>>85222380
>that rumor about force sensitive pengujns was true

Dear lord...and those weren't even the worst spoilers. This movie might be doa

>>85222865
the list goes on...

C-3P0
R2D2
Jawas

wtf were they smoking

>>85222998
That isn't going to happen, the media has a narrative now and Star Wars is playing right into it.

>everyone hated Ewoks
>but now it's ok to love Porgs

Lucasfilm and Disney need to burn

>>85222659
it's been dead since 1997

disney is sooooo based *___*

>>85223054

Force trees and reincarnation? I suppose that is a sort of narrative there.. At least it will be easy for children to understand.

>>85222380
isn't this supposed to be the "dark" movie? they probably only make a small appearance

>>85223046
Jawa were never cute, they were shady droid salesmen and akin to used car Arabs you'd deal with in the 80s.

The droids weren't "cute and epic" either, they were the... Okay, so Greek theater had something called the "Citizens" who were more or less a collective character. They exist entirely to comment on the story or a character.

That is what the droids are, and have always been.

>>85222773
Got a link to a full synopsis or was that all that was leaked?

>>85222773
bRAVA

>>85223110
The Force (the Light Side at least) is feminine, and Rey is in fact an avatar of Good. The subtext here is that Luke is inferior to Rey.

Also the whole, "women are the future" thing they're pushing so hard.

At least the ewoks look like they could be some sort of intelligent alien, not just alien seapups

>>85223181

I wish lucas wasn't legally restrained from speaking his mind.

I bet he could write a book about how he got leveraged out of his own universe and the entire deal with the disney.

I hope he writes it and it gets released after his death.

>Hey you know those things that make repeat viewings of RotJ a chore?
>Uh yeah those stupid mini wookies
>Yeah those things, what if we shaved them and put them in episode 8
>Brilliant

The same fags who keep pissing on ROTJ because of the Ewoks are drooling over little penguins that are only designed to sell stuffed animals to little girls and reatards

>>85223181
If this and all of the leaks are true I will quit this franchise I have loved for so long

>>85223293
>Reatards

Don't you mean Reytards?

>>85223293

I feel like it's more that most people have accepted the disappointment at this point.

Like the entire time Lucas had it, there was hope and anger and always more hope for shit to be better, so you can feel that.

And now that they know they're getting remakes and yearly release garbage and trainwreck behind the scenes stuff.

Like Howard showing very basic shit on his twitter to show investors "Hey this isn't a trainwreck anymore, its okay to unclench. I'll fix this shit" Twitter post like doing normal director behavior is going to fix shit.

I bet the behind the scenes stories are better than what we will ever see on screen.

>>85223293
It's also the same people who shat on the EU because it ruined the perfect ending of RotJ but then said TFA was amazing...for ruining the perfect ending of RotJ

They're there to sell dolls and other merchandising to little girls. Guess what? They'll eat it up.

My grandfather fought nazis for us to get this shit?

He was robbed. Fucking Jews owe him, especially since they don't appreciate it and never did.

Look at the SW commercials released over the past two movies.

SW: for everyone BUT white boys.

>>85223362
>Trainwreck behind the scenes stuff

This interests me.

>>85223327
He obviously meant readhards

>>85223451
>My grandfather fought nazis for us to get this shit?
No, your grandfather fought Nazi Germany so a Jewish controlled central bank could be installed. This is just icing on that shit cake.

>>85223501
The force is female.

Time is female.

Society is female.

The media is female.

The future is female.

>>85223451
Your grandfather fought so you could live a comfortable life and shitpost on electronic croatian tapestry. Have some respect!

>>85223551
Can't wait to reincarnate and be a total slut

BONG

>>85223362
>I bet the behind the scenes stories are better than what we will ever see on screen.
An epic about the entire Disney saga over the last ten years would be pretty cool
>Starts with Iron Man where they didn't even have a script due to the writers' strike
>RDJ immediately becomes an insufferable prima donna
>skip forward through teething problems - gamble on gotg and James Gunn
>the entire Edgar Wright debacle
>the shit-flinging campaigns
>firing Trank from star wars after f4ntastic
>tfa failing to become the highest-grossing film of all time (and subsequent criticisms of remaking anh and mary-sue shit)
>the attempts to get spiderman back (and dealing with Sony)
>the collapse of rogue one half-way through
>firing the director of Han Solo 3 weeks before filming is supposed to finish
Aah, it could be something great. Maybe it'd work better as a tv show actually

>>85223020
>They taste like chicken

BRAVO RIAN
YOU ARE THE SAVIOUR OF STAR WARS
99% ON ROTTEN TOMATO

>>85223613
You'll get gangbanged by the school's ethnic gangs before you hit 13.

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i want midichlorians back

>>85223362
>Like Howard showing very basic shit on his twitter to show investors "Hey this isn't a trainwreck anymore, its okay to unclench. I'll fix this shit" Twitter post like doing normal director behavior is going to fix shit.

Ron Howard and his tweets are really pathetic. It's screams desperation. I bet Kathleen Kennedy begged him to save her ass when Phil&Lord refused to modify the movie

>>85223093
Since '83

>>85222959
But anon muh vagina makes life!

>>85222908
Star Wars used to be about setting the trends.

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Porgs spinoff when?

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>>85222849
:o3

>>85225247
>2 porg movies a la the ewok movies
id watch them, probably be kino too

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>the absolute state of Star Wars

Some people have tried to tell me that I just got older, but I'm sorry, Star Wars and movies in general were not this shit 20-30 years ago. They just weren't.

why do you hate them so much tho

>>85222998
So Star Wars is ripping off Naruto? Nice

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>>85223551
The most powerful person in the world is a cis white man

>>85224456

It's business 101 if you have a company's liquidity as dependent on continued investment due to brand consciousness.

Disney needs people to keep investing in them to keep it's model sustainable because right now shit like ESPN and their other stalwart brands are in major flux.

So Starwars needs to remain a certainty. Ron Howard is the plumber and he's coming in to right the ship and tell people he's got this.

It is pathetic but that's the job. You smooth over the other idiots unprofessional approach. Indie directors and comedy ones have no business being on massive bi-tent pole projects sustaining billions in potential profits. They just don't and it was a bad idea on lucasfilms part all the way through.

Disney will be up their ass for a long time because of their bad exec decisions.

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>>85222510
>tfw there will be a blink-and-you-miss-it comment about how they use the force to fly
>tfw later in the movie, this will be the only excuse for the full on Dragonball Z/Jotaro vs. Dio style shift, where all of a sudden Rey and Kylo can both fly like Superman
>tfw this will persist into future movies, and casually flying about will be just another thing Jedi can do

>>85226010
>implying they will even have a comment when Rey could BS her way through everything with no explanation

>>85225936
Disney has to fire Kathleen Kennedy in the first place. The company will never get right as long as she's there. Making a soft reboot for the sequel is insane. It might have worked on TFA because we didn't know what it was about. But it's a troilogy, and now people know there aren't any surprise in the next movies, it will be a copy of ESB and ROTJ. Just like Rian johnson admitted, "but with different characters"

>>85222380

R34 on luke and rey fucking porgs get

>>85226172

She was probably the secret go-between that helped leverage lucas into selling in the first place. She will either retire or die before being fired from Lucasfilm.

>>85226211
This, she immediately turned on Lucas once the deal was made.

http://www.strawpoll.me/13491431

>>85222570
Do you realize that every single idea has been thought off in the EU, and any original idea anyone might have about a Star Wars character probably has something similar in the EU. Thanks autists

>Jar Jar Binks = bad
>Minions = bad
>Ewoks = bad

>Ep 9 Puffins = good

why are people reacting this way?

>>85226172
>>85226211
>>85226230
You know this is probably what happened:
>2012
>Shit, I'm getting old. I need to start thinking about who I want to pass the torch onto for the Legacy of Star Wars
>Kathleen, you've been my trusted friend for decades. What do you think?
>Oy Vey, you should hand it over to Disney ™. They know children, and they know how to have fun. Just look at their Marvel movies?
>Hmm, yeah, Disney! I liked that Star Tours thing we did together, and they have a good track record. Get Bob Iger on the phone!
>Hey Bob, yeah it's me, George. Listen, I wanted to talk to you about selling Lucasfilm. But hey, I want you to use my story treatments and ideas for the next Star Wars films okay?
>Oy Vey! Of cohwars Geeorge. We would NEVER do anything to hurt our bottom line-I mean Star Wars!

>>85226416
Normies fucking love all of those things

>>85222380
Jesus, cutesy animal sidekicks aside why does this look so BAD

It looks like a 2002-era CGI shot

>we want the Minions audience

>>85226479
It's not CGI, it's practical

>>85226434

Based on how depressed he seems in general and how he acted at starwars celebration, especially when harrison treated the entire thing like a joke and he joined in laughing.

Old lucas would have been pissed if harrison would have been shitting on starwars in public like that but now hes laughing with him.

That's actions of a guy that got fucked. And admitting to it would only make it look worse so he just goes with it.

>>85226541
I actually think he's senile no joke. He decided one day it was time to sell Star Wars on a complete whim, and now he regrets it

>>85226541
Link

>>85226416
Dude it's Star Wars lmao just turn your brain off at least it isn't I HATE SAND lol uhhhh can someone say cringe??? Haha so glad Lucas isn't around anymore

Listen, going by the other fandoms I have been part of where major changes and retconning happened to a series the hardcore SW fan reaction will be

>initial anger and hatred
>warming up to the idea
>loving and adoring these new things to the point of disowning everything before it and the people who don't like it

>>85226629
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTqmkkw22vs&t=1427s

its from 40th in orlando, hold on, I need to find which video its in.

>>85222681
If you are 25, born under 1980 and have a PC you MUST play this game

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Why a Force Tree? Why explain something which nobody questioned in the first place? Pic related

>>85222489
it's true...all of it

>>85226684

No other fandom has been like starwars bud, there is no allegory that fits.

It was under the helm of one guy, who had a specific vision, and allowed other people to create in his universe and for most part left them alone to do it.

That is unheard of and niche oriented merchandising of the universe allowed multiple fandoms to grow in same universe, again all the same timeline, no multiverse extra.

Everyone got a little of what they wanted and it just has never happened before with a product that was treated with so much reverence despite being a commercial thing in a capitalist society. Unheard of. It will never happen again.

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>>85226010
Sir, I respectfully request that you DELETE THIS!!!!!!!

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>>85222380
>Will Introduce The Porgs aka Ewoks 2.0
>>85222443
>watch 'em babble in minion-speak.

Oh god this is why they were made. We talked shit about the Ewoks for toys thing but this is so much worse they want these fuckers plastered on everything by the time the movie's done.

>>85222380
They want to sell toys.
Only girls buy toys this days.
So they are making a cute teddy bear for them.

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>>85223613
>Can't wait to reincarnate and be a total slut

You hateful bigot how dare you suggest you can't just choose to be a woman at any moment for any reason?

I'll report you to the internet police right now for your transphobic misogyny.

>>85226479
Are you fucking retarded?

>>85226629
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcPRbke-hxI


here you go anon, enjoy

>>85223064
>everyone hated the ewoks
Fuck that, most star wars fans think ewoks are cool.

>>85222380
porgs are not even going to be like the ewoks. They are just to give the planet wildlife flavor like how dagobah had tons of creatures in the swamp.

>>85227021

No they don't. Kids like things when they're younger like gungans and ewoks but i've never heard someone spout a positive opinion about them above 14.

>>85227021
Which part of the 90s were you born in?

>>85227060
>>85227064
The jokes on you faggots who never watched Return of the Jedi as a kid. I was born in the 80s. Ewoks are a kids first exposure to the concept of effective guerrilla warfare. The best army in galaxy being destroyed by a primitive group with a home advantage. Nothing wrong with ewoks. Also all of star wars is for kids. Get over it.

>>85227021
No anon, the leak says otherwise. And the leak was the thing that predicted porgs in the first place.

>>85223451
My grandfather survived Auschwitz. But he didn't make it out of Nuremberg.

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>>85226010
>Kylo spends the entire first half learning Snoke's secret technique to fly>he then confronts Rey and starts winning using his flying technique
>Rey concentrates really hard and then manages to fly too and beats Kylo

>>85227021
Except there wasn't a focus on the fauna of dagobah, it was more implied that there were weird swamp creatures there, and the thing that spat out R2. Not this beanie baby tier shilling.

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>>85227246

>>85227261
So they're going to rip of naruto AND dbz?

>>85227231

You know how many dudes on 4chan were born in the 80s? A large amount, who gives a shit faggot. Your fallacious, baseless argument remains. Nobody above an adolescents age has went around defending Yub Nub. It was a decision to sell toys and we all get that but the movie would have been much better with Wookies.

>>85227004
>I'll be watching it as a... [will I be watching it?].. err I'll be watching it as a... [it sounds shit though? why is it a thing?].... I'll be watching it as a... as a fan, yeah...

>>85227060
Gungans are cool Chinese mermaid aliens, Jar Jar gave all of them a bad rap.

>>85227435

Wookiees*

>>85227458

Nah, don't get me wrong, I loved playing as the gungans on the Aoe II clone ripoff, Starwars Battlegrounds. I remember being so hype when the expansion pack for clone wars came out just before the movie.

>reminder that luke is around 19 years old during a new hope
>reminder that order 66 happened 19 years ago
>reminder that for some reason, everyone thinks the jedi are just legends and never existed even though they were in a galaxy spanning war a few years before that

Why are people so obsessed with the sloth rumor?

If its true then it will just be another cave hallucination scene like Luke had on Dagobah.

>Rey on some spiritual hallucination trip
>See monster appears but takes the form of Vader/Anakin because of her force vision
>It tries to kill her
>She kills it

Wow whats the big deal?

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>>85222630
>"Now that's a game I haven't heard in a long time."
My fucking childhood right there.

>>85227561

10k jedi in a galaxy of trillions? not hard to see why it would take.

We have documented recordings of the Moon landing, are there more people becoming hoaxers or less?

Human belief in something is a strange concept when you realize most memories you have dull after 5 years. That's eye-witness testimony, sometimes they stretch that but the conceit is that human memory fades. It changes as you live life and fill in gaps that never happened. The experience changes you even if you can't recall to make you what you are.

The people affected by jedi would remember but entire planets went centuries without seeing a Jedi.

>>85227435
You have to go back, you underage scum. Only shit tier nu-star wars fans dislike yub nub. It's one of the worst changes in the special edition. I grew up watching pre-special editions. Go back to plebbit or twitter, little faggot.

>>85227561
>reminder that order 911 happened 16 years ago
>reminder that for some reason, everyone thinks the attacks were an inside job are just legends and never existed even though they were in middle east spanning war a few years before that.
>Reminder no one wants to admit Muslims are the problem

Why do people insist on trying to explain the force?
It will always be stupid and unsatisfying because every fan has essentially his own idea on how the force works. Its supposed to be mysterious its a mystical invisible energy field

>>85227658

Underage? being born in the 80s is putting people in their 30s anon. How old are you?

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There is nothing outside of the grasp of the Jews.

>>85227561
>everyone thinks the jedi are just legends and never existed even though they were in a galaxy spanning war a few years before that

You misinterpreted it. The reference to the "ancient religion" just shows that people thought the Jedi were irrelevant at that point, not that they didn't exist.

>>85227561
>reminder that the galaxy is literally full of trillions of people
>reminder that the jedi make up less than 0.00000001% of the galaxy and all live on the same planet
>reminder that the only fighters in the clone wars were clone troopers (who died or became stormtroopers), droids and jedi
>reminder that myths are very easy to formulate and skepticism is rife ["I heard the jedi can 200 ft in the air!", "fucking bs, if they're so powerful, where are they all now?"]

>>85227503
>Banthas are filthy animals, I don't eat filthy animals.

>>85227561
There are trillions of life forms and millions of planets throughout the galaxy and l doubt even a a quarter million Jedi. The probabilitied of any one sentient lifeform seeing one is nil, and the clone wars didn't actually touch the majority of worlds. Thus over 20 years, the authoritarian government easily went from "Jedi are traitors" to "what Jedi."

>>85227768

I liked the bane trilogy explanation the most, it riffed off of how ANH basically said. "Sorcerous ways" like they know shit exists but think its all exxageration and mythology.

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Who is ready for Han Solo to be a good guy from the beginning in the Hon Solo movie?

>>85227781
>implying there wouldnt be 513 jedi reality tv shows

>>85227868

Woody would have been a better han solo, at least he can play a believable dirt bag.

>>85223254
>I wish lucas wasn't legally restrained from speaking his mind.
The man was blackmailed. If he tried for a posthumous memoir, Disney would make sure certain witnesses, rumors, or victims came forward to destroy his credibility.

>>85227868
chewie looks fucking dead inside

>>85227868
He doesn't look anything like Ford.

>>85227939

I know that's what they would do but at least those that got a chance to read it would see his side.

>>85222380
>A children's movie gets adorable creatures children will find cute
Why are people raging about this again?

>>85222943
Same

>>85227868
>finally a disney wars movie with male protagonist

>>85227868
I heard the Han Solo movie was originally supposed to be a comedy, I would've liked it if it was about young Han being a douche.

>>85227868
>Han Solo to be a good guy from the beginning

oh fuck I just realized this is what they are going to do

And lando will probably be best buddies with him from the get go too

>>85228029

A brunette is right next to him, in the middle. Just like all the other starwars movies. Imagine that.

>>85222849
The force is female

TRUE STORY:

I help run a weekly self help seminar, we had a client in LA whom worked special effects on Last Jedi, I jokingly asked him if the movie was going to be good knowing he can't answer because of confidentiality. He gave me a sheepish grin and an eye roll indicating its going to suck.

>>85222630

I love you.
Yassss
Love that game

>>85228031
You're a fucking faggot anon

>>85228134

Everyone already knows its going to be an ESB clone, so its not exactly hard to shift the cards when the actors themselves said exactly what is going to happen.

My major problem is they didn't improve on what they're remaking which seems wrong somehow.

>>85228031
>Dude Where's my Car but with Han and Chewie.

>>85223254
i have no sympathy nor interest.
Lucas has been helped to greatness and pushed away everyone, only to reveal his true autistic mind that is trapped in 40's serials.
He sold out, he has nothing to cry over.

>>85228216
Go back you dumb fuck

>>85228302

He was helped to greatness? Jesus you kasdin fucks are annoying.

He helped himself to greatness by doing shit nobody else was doing at the time like merchandising. Then self funding his own fucking movies.

>>85227973
manchildren have no developed empathy.
Also this is emotionally manipulative shit from a heartless profiteering corporation.

>>85228349

You first, faggot. Enjoy u

>>85228370
You fucking moron GL was always the worst part of the franchise. Editing, costume and set design and the original producers including his ex wife made the movies good. The first movie would be a forgotten bomb if not for other people fixing his retarded decisions. Read a goddamn book

>>85227868
>all that behind the scenes drama

Movie is gonna suck so hard

>firing directors
>rewrites
>arguments over what the tone should be
>need to fly in fucking acting coaches

There is actually no way it can be saved

>>85228454

Go rub one out to RLM, faggot.

>>85225831
>most powerful man in the world
>can't repeal obamacare

>>85228370
his films would have been roger corman tier without the creatives he had around him.
and dont forget Marcia Lou Griffin, but i guess you dont know about her input on star wars and indy.

>>85228474
>Everything is RLM

You dummy. Read The Making of Star Wars. GL is an autistic clown who has ten bad decisions for every good one.

>>85228402
What did he mean by this?

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>>85228455
>tfw Disney gives us Han Solo, Chewbaca, and Lando save the day from evil white men instead of giving us a film of Han's early years in the underworld smuggling drugs and killing snitches.
>Also there will be a bloodless wookie arm ripoff.

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>>85222489
A Sloth Lord?

>>85228455

>there will be another Fant4stic-tier fiasco within our lifetime

>>85228474
>implying RLM is the only people in the planet that don't like Lucas

(you)

If you've read or watching any documentary on Star Wars you can see how much the people behinds the scenes (not Lucas) contributed to making Star Wars a success.

It also isn't a coincidence when Lucas had almost total power on a movie (the prequels) all his shit ideas were magnified x100 and all of those movies were panned by almost everyone.

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>>85228659
Are you threatening me Master Jedi?

>>85228672

Yeah because Disney has been a great font of making good things.

We should have reading time of Chuck Wendig's genius on display in here or copying someone else's homework and acting like they're making something new but no lets shit on guy trying different shit.

>Defending nuDisney

Get fucked.

>>85228669
That makes me kinda excited about seeing the train wreck it produces

I enjoyed watching Fant4stic with friends because of how fucking bad and weird it was

>>85228801
>implying I'm defending Disney

Where'd you get that?

Disney fucking blows at handling Star Wars and I found both movies they've made to be awful. Rogue One in particular.

I'm just saying Lucas also fucking sucks you retard. If it was up to me I'd say nobody should make another Star Wars movie.

>>85228801
>disliking the prequels means you like Disney Star Wars
>disliking Jorge for ruining his own franchise so bad he had to sell it to the most soulless corporation on earth

You're one mad faggot

Disney needs to be killed. We need to let Star Wars go to rest so that it can inspire the next generation of childhood fantasies, not be rehashed into soulless cash grabs to fill the Mouses' bottomless pockets.

>>85228889
>There will be new Star Wars films coming out as you draw you dying breath in the nursing home.

>>85226684
I don't see that happening because we saw just this situation (maybe with a touch less retconning) before ala the prequel trilogy. Aside form le ebin contrarians & an embedded minority of sympathizers, I didn't see those movies change everyone's opinion. Much less, disavow the OT/OT fans. Even normies who gobble this shit up in troves still seemed at least somewhat polarized over Episode VII and Rogue One; and I'm sure there will be minimal love for this upcoming Young Han standalone.

As >>85226748 said, this fandom is truly like none other. This shit, although faaaaaaar from perfect, is a flatout, unabashed cultural phenomenon. With the fanbase being as rabid as it is, I don't see it collectively just embracing this shitshow.

Look at Marvel's shit. Even normies are beginning to show at least some degree of fatigue. Such will eventually be Disney Star Wars once the sequel trilogy ends and curiosity dies down.

>>85228744
can anyone give me the source or the copy pasta of the sloth theory?

I told it to a a friend but he doesn't believe it.

>>85222380
Am i the only one who remembers the leak where the guy mentioned these specifically? A long with the sea monster/Anakin scene?

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>>85226434
why are neckbeards so butthurt against Jews? Did they keep you a virgin into your 20s?

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>>85226434
>George was pure! it was da j00z that sold out and just want to merchandise everything!

Yeah kiddie, george was a real bastion of principle. Not concerned about the bottom line at all.

>>85222773
It's fake retard

>>85229239
Since you know so much, can you tell us who Rey's parents are?

>>85229112
Shut the fuck up newfag, that shit has been posted 100 times.

>>85229300
nothing about it has been leaked (yet) iirc

detailed plot stuff like that rarely ever leaks... most of the time it's settings and ship/creature/whatever designs.

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>>85229050

>>85229116
Anon, that picture is very offensive. I would appreciate it if you would take it down. I have a thyroid condition and we all know how bad the economy is, so it's very mean-spirited of you to poke fun of that in your comic.
Thanks in advance

>>85224660
The fact that you think that is true makes me boil. You're a stupid fanboy kid. Star Wars was a rehash of almost everything. It didn't revolutionize anything, it was embraced by stupid fat american fucks like you. I detest you so much.

>>85229555
No, Star Wars is great because it was a rehash of everything. It brought back a classic story and it was a big hit. Things don't have to be revolutionary to be good.

>>85229447
a-at least Ben beats Rey in a fight before randomly joining the good side and being completely forgiven I guess?

>>85229612
that's the argument used to defend TFA

>>85229555
>It didn't revolutionize anything

The visuals sure were awful.

>>85229662
Yeah and it's accepted by a lot of people.

>>85222380
member when Star Wars showed people burnt alive

>>85222804

"Hey Rian. We know that you are making a original Star Wars sequel despite all of our notes to make it the exact same as Empire Strikes Back but marketing research has shown that little kids love mini things and lots of them that making annoying sounds so we believe that its in our best interest that you add these creatures to the film and yes we 'consulted' George Lucas he is totally on board. So just go to the creature artists and tell them to add some cute small aliens and find a place for them in the story and give them just enough screen time and dialogue to fulfill projected toy sales. Thanks!"

>>85227969
I would be very interested in reading what he has to say. I'd even be ready to overlook whatever dirt they have on him because it was very likely that baited/tricked him into it.

>>85222380
This is what happens when you pander to nerd gurls.

>>85230031
you forgot
*nerd virgins

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>>85228634
>Also there will be a bloodless wookie arm ripoff
a droid who beats him at chess.

RLM probably nailed it, every single thing referenced in Han's life up to the point of A New Hope will be featured in the "stand alone" movie, all with heavy winks, and lingering camera shots.
>kessel run
>winning the Falcon from Lando
>Chewie life debt
>outrunning those big correlian ships
>hidden floor hatches
>how he got his gun
>how he got his vest
>how he got his pants
>how he got the quad cannons
>greedo backstory
>Jabba backstory
>boba fet backstory
>dengar swoop race back story
>Heater back story
>dumping the spice
>learning to shoot first
>not believing in the Force

It will be a mess.

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Why are virgins so afraid of women liking Star Wars?

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>>85229112
>thing is mentioned dozens of times prior to post
>"Hey guys remember this obscure secret thing that's clearly been referenced a dozen times prior to my comment?"
Die in a fire

>>85230134
hey m8 you should delete that other post that you fucked up

>>85229447
I don't understand it. What is doing Anakin's ghost inside a monster bullying some force sensitive penguins?

Also, he is inside an evil monster and then when the monster is killed by Rey he is good and gives good advide to Rey?

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>>85225247
IT
WILL
HAPPEN

If the porgs are happening I hope the rest of the leaks are fake

>>85230185
why would he be in an evil monster when he turned back to the light?

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>>85229116
OY VEY!

>>85230233
he's a white male

>>85230134
I'd let her star in my wars if you catch my drift

>implying they'll have any impact on Episode 8's story
This is the film series that releases encyclopaedias for characters that have 2 second screentime.

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Can we boycott Star Wars and capeshit already?

Not just on this site but in real life. All these franchises as intellectual properties are fucking worthless.

Burn it all. I don't care about Star Wars anymore. Its all a gaint racket for chinese kids and fake nerds

>>85230391
No one is forcing you to watch or even pay any attention to either of the things you've mentioned.

>>85230134
because women are incapable of enjoying any artistic object or culture in-itself, instead utilizing or levying them in their infinite and endless juggling of social capital. pretending to enjoy certain shows or films can net female betas higher prospect mates than what their attractiveness (a woman's only feature) can normally gain them. the degree to which women like a certain product or thing is proportional to the level it has been compromised as a pure object, dragged and demeaned by the female parasite. It is also an indicator of a thing's simplicity. Women are demonstrably less intelligent and thus their continued growth in the star wars demographic means Star Wars is becoming dumber than it already was. Episode 3 / the clone wars TV show was the height of female non-interest in Star Wars

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>>85222804
I can't believe they would stoop to that level. This is definitely the end of Star Wars.

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>>85230623
ur virgin lol

>>85230584
I can't escape from it. It's fucking everywhere. People won't shut the fuck up about this garbage "BRAAAHH DA NEW BLACK PANTHER TRAILER DROPPED SHIT LOOKS FIRE YAAAAS SLAY"

people endlessly discussing marvel/dc films, star wars and planet of the apes will be my Hell when I die. I just wish people would watch something with substance once in a while ffs

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>>85230134
>Why are virgins so afraid of women liking Star Wars?
Because many guys who were awkward in their youth, especially around girls, found comfort in the fantastic escapism of Star Wars and were happy to immerse themselves in its lore. Even in the face of normie and female ridicule.

Fast forward to the Current Year. Disney has blackmailed George Lucas into selling Star Wars and is now deliberately marketing the universe those awkward guys lived in and loved to the normies and girls who used to make fun of them. Disney has gone so far as to erase the Expanded Universe, replacing it with an unfamiliar and diminished, studio-sterilized version, more accessible to the masses. Disney has undermined the beloved characters of the original trilogy, writing new and unflattering endings for them. Their replacements exclude anything relateable to the franchise's core fan demographic, opting instead to present a self-insert fan-fic Mary Sue for the girls and a parade of minorities for the urban and international markets. For a laugh and to add insult to injury, Disney created Unkar Plutt as a lampoon of the stereotypical Star Wars fan: a fat, unpleasant collector of junk from the franchise, who hoards the Millenium Falcon (Star Wars' past), and holds back Rey (Star War' future). He is portrayed as a dead-end who deserves to be left behind. Casting Simon Pegg, the nerdy fanboy-turned actor, to play Unkar Plutt, was not a coincidence. To top all this off, Disney is redefining the Force itself.

So it's not that virgins are afraid of women liking Star Wars. When we see some girl wearing a trendy Star Wars shirt, we don't resent her. We resent what she represents.

>>85230815
Star Wars was always for normies. Women went just to see Harrison Ford.

The fucking NERDS made it about themselves by "relating" to characters and that's why they got picked on, because their idols are fictional characters.

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>>85226010
Already a thing

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>>85226010
>Tfw Kylo's ability to stop a bullet evolves into stopping time
>cuz Dark Side
>He'll shout "Za Galaxy"

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>>85230815
All that may be true, but THIS image is everything wrong with the Star Wars franchise today. It's become politicized for intersectionalities. I wouldn't be surprised if there was a new upcoming Star Wars character that was a gay black man with a septum piercing.

Star Wars is supposed to be a galaxy far far away in a time that is not representative of ours. Escapism. They are trying to equate real life issues in a sci fi fantasy film.

>>85230233
yeah, that's What I mean. It makes no sense.

>>85230739
>I just wish people would watch something with substance once in a while
HAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHA he thinks he is in some intellectual cinema forum

>>85231429
I wasn't talking about people here but that's true too

The more intriguing story is that Snoke is based on Donald Trump. There's been a lot of jokes about how he's Goldmember, but in reality the character is a direct reference to Donald Trump.

Snoke lives in a room lined with gold. This is a direct reference to Trump who before becoming president lived in a penthouse whose walls were lined with gold

>>85226692
Game?

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>>85222489
>implying normies will dislike anything Star Wars does as long as it has a female lead

>>85229631
yes >>85229447 sounds so weird that i have doubts that this is true

>>85223020
Teach me your ways

>>85229555
>>85229696
its the same idiots who defend a constant rumination of movies based on comics (yes i am looking at you Marvel and Sony)

nobody asked for it and it was not necessary

>>85229007
God I hope they get tired soon. Normies fucking ruin everything they touch. And now Star Trek is fucked too.

>>85230641
read the tread again numale faggot

>>85230815
this
and they couldn't bother less to create a decent story

>>85230815
This x1000

>>85228544
>creatives
absolute fag detected

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>>85232402
she has as much personality as a character in an MMO?

>Casino in the Behind the Scenes

Does this mean that leaked script was real?

>>85232962
The very first "leak" we got for TLJ was pictures from Canto Bight. Any spoilers could easily have been crafted from that alone, but anything is possible.

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>where back on an ice planet
>people thought this wasn't going to be an empire remake

What's it feel like to be retarded disneyshills?

What is this thing about a Tree?

Isn't the Force meant to be an Aether? Like the ethereal binding underlying all matter?

>>85230134
>Why are virgins so afraid of women liking Star Wars?
because something that made them unique and helped them pretend to be a smart geek, makes them just socially inept virgins.

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>>85233174
>isn't the Force meant to be an Aether? Like the ethereal binding underlying all matter?
Oh sweetie...

>>85233167
The only retarded one is you because no ice planets have been shown for TLJ. You're obviously thinking of the white-red dirt covering Crait. If you're going to be antagonistic, at least put the effort in to be right.

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>>85233167
>Don't worry anon their won't be any scenery that is simlar to ESB

wait
FUCK

>>85233167
>another rehash

Fuck it I'm out

People I know defend this garbage by saying shit like "Star Wars is about history repeating itself"

>>85222773

Wow wtf Disney gtfo with this binary boy-girl origin story bullshit. This is 2017 that's not even close to how many genders the force should've split into ugh

>>85233167
It's called poetry.

>>85233335
God damn it.

>>85222609
none of this will happen, retard

>>85233624
it is sad to see all the fanboys shilling for this rehash

>>85228659
Fuck you for making me laugh. I have the worst pain in my sides already due to a pulled muscle, and now it's even worse. I'm going to die laughing

>>85230099
That is very definitely not a moth

>>85222570
Not sure why the Yawn books are so highly praised. Force suppressing salamanders and all knowing generals is lazy and retarded.
>defeats armies from listening to music and staring at paintings
Wonder why more stoners aren't five star generals in US army.

READ THIS READ THIS
THE ANAKIN IS THE SLOTH SHIT IS A FAKE LEAK MIXED IN WITH THE REAL ONE TO THROW EVERYBODY OFF

The sloth is a force sensitive animal, the same as the porgs. Luke tells Rey that he senses a disturbance in the force deep in the sea and sends Rey alone to investigate. She goes into an underwater cave and follows it's trail until she finds this blue sloth thing in a rampage attacking a porg nest. Luke watches from above through an opening in ceiling unbeknownst to Rey. She fights the sloth and eventually kills it. Theres a flash of light and it explodes into blue energy as the force leaves its body. Rey stands over it and seems almost proud of her feat. Camera pans up to Luke who is rubbing his chin and seems very troubled. In his ear we hear a voice "To tame the beast, not slay it she was".

>>85232332
No

>>85233975
agree but the book is still better than episode 7

When are we getting a movie that takes place in the prequel era? I'm tired of seeing X-Wings and Tie Fighters.

>>85234806
You'll get ARCs and headhunters and v-wings with the tie engine sound a la ROTS epilogue instead.

>>85234806
It's going to be a good ten years until the Prequels can be considered nostalgic so maybe then if Disney doesn't milk Star Wars try.

>>85234930
>try
Do or do not

those are not birds

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>>85234996
Kek

>>85235083
They're FORCE BIRDS

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>>85225247
>>85230186

Just made this to describe my feelings on the matter.

I think they're cute
and I'll probably buy the eventual plushie

>>85223029
What else mr Hogan?

>>85235186
no, someone said earlier that birds should have beaks and feathers. But those are some alien freaks with nostrils and teeth.
Don't post the geese, i know.

God damn this thread is still going? I was just kidding about my little Jew story guys

>>85235355
Geese don't count as birds anyway. They are hell spawn disguised as birds.

>>85235355
It's just like an otter.
A FORCE OTTER

I don't know what that means.

Isn't the force in everything?

>>85233246
m-mommy?

>>85235233
I also saw it on Reddit, anon

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>>85235631
Well I made it but there's not much I can say to prove that.

>>85235233
>10/10 - Chris Stuckmann
10/10 OC, anon. I laughed hard.

>>85235631
>>85235675
Redditors are the biggest fucking thieves on the planet. They'll never stop stealing our memes.

>>85222380
Literally just "TOYS" the creature.

Fuck nu-Star Wars

>>85235541
>Isn't the force in everything?
imagine the force bacteria or a super-virus that uses the dark force to spread and kill life. Black death plague was a sith?

>>85235737
Agreed.

Where did it get posted though?

>>85235446
>Geese
Dafuq is a geese

>>85222804
And since it's Disney SJWars and not George, they'll eat it up.

>>85232329
feels bad man

>>85236044
It's a Geese you Goose.

>>85233501
its pottery
>bravo didney

>>85222489

They're already doing damage control. Watch the behind the scenes video from D23 and pay close attention to what everyone in it is saying.

>>85233944
It's a force moth faggit

>>85236510
Imagine Gosling in Star Wars
if they made a Han Solo stand alone movie he could be the man

>>85222380

oh my gawwwd i need a plushie of him in my next lootcrate

>>85236657
I thought it was kind of odd.

Taking the context of Marks thoughts on the new movies, and keeping that in mind with his statements...

Talking about things he wouldn't have even imagined. That doesn't necessarily mean they're good.

Daisy says it feels SOOO much like its own thing.

Anthony literally just says he's impressed by how many of them there are. Like honestly you could use that line to advertise any sw film these days.

>>85236770
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZOLKwSsFik

There's no reason why these movies couldn't have been good. Even Disney could have made them at least better than the prequels, the ideas are there. The execution and choice of direction is just awful though.

>>85237317
>The ideas are there

you mean just ripping off the OT? Because that's not an idea

>>85237147
Lel
Seen that before
>can we fine someone that's less charismatic please
Haha

>>85237333
No, that's part of the problem. When I read the spoilers, there's pieces that could actually make for an interesting film, something darker. Instead we get blatant ripoffs of the original trilogy. And force sloths.

>>85237514
It shouldn't be 'darker', it should be 'balanced', does that make sense?

If Star Wars is a story of black and white, then make VII - IX about the null, the grey, the void, the inbewteen.

I think going be the trailer they might be going for that, who knows.

>>85236916

And they make a point of it all being Rian's idea and how much influence he had on the film, like Disney is setting him up as the fall guy.

>>85237568
Darker would be more balanced, since tfa was nothing more than a marvel movie.

>>85237722
Force Awakens is textbook "Playing it safe".
It's a good movie, it's funny, fun, has mysteries, whatever.

There's just a lack of substance when you really dig into it.

>>85231259
It still fascinates me how hard many people (especially those who live on the Coasts) seem to live in their own little world where...

... Oh my god, is this what happens in a world without tradition? When Globalism is the only form of culture you get, you seek out Globalist icons to latch onto as heroes and legends. In this capacity, things like Harry Potter and Marvel and Star Wars are serving as those rocks of tradition for you to latch onto. It all makes so much fucking sense now, if you kill the old myths you need to replace them with the new, and you've got a myth factory right in the center of your operation.

It's why you get so many people who insist on using the Rebel symbol as one of rebellion, or talk passionately about Dumbledore's Army or the whimsical adventures of a two-bit British sci-fi show. These aren't ENTERTAINMENT to them, they're SYMBOLS.

>>85237911
>This is coming from a website that spawned a movement that uses a cartoon frog as their symbol

Don't get me wrong, using entertainment as a symbol is fucking retarded, but you gotta be self aware here

>>85228029

I'm betting YAAAS DRAGON QUEEN will be the one who actually pilots the Falcon during the Kessel run.

>>85222773
>biblical analogies

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>>85230134

Megan is /ourgirl/

>>85237911
No it's just stupid people.
It's like the people who get gaming tattoos or movie tattoos.

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>>85237333
This. Finn and Ren are great characters to use. Rey too, minus the whole mary sue aspect. But no, couldn't have a Star Wars movie without copying half of Episode 4. I would have been totally cool if none of the old characters showed up, even no C-3PO or R2-D2. Then again that wouldn't have sold as well, so there we go. It's all money, not what fans want.

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>>85230815
Well put. Disney was a mistake. I still remember all those videos when Thrawn was revealed in Rebels. It bewildered me how many knew about him. Like not to be that 'secret club' guy, but it's ridiculous how many are openly Star Wars fans. As a kid I had a few friends that knew Star Wars lore more than anything, but it seems like that had to be erased so Disney could do what they please with this new generation.

How can they be shittier than Ewoks? I remember always wanting to kill them when I was a kid.

>>85222380
Oh shit that leak was right, the one that talked about space penguins and the giant space sloth. Holy shit this is just awful

>>85239047
Where are the Star Wars bananas with Finn on the front

>>85238749
This, have it be set like hundreds of years in the future, new vehicles, new story, new characters, and it would make sense why everybody had forgotten about the Jedi.

Finn was my favorite character because it was a fish out of water story for him, the movie should have been all about him

>>85232329
Cancer is as cancer does, we know this. I'm personally ecstatic for the new trend of live action anime coming to Hollywood soon, I'm going to bully the absolute fuck out of normalfags for their shit taste.

>>85239499
Y'know they will just bully you for watching anime right?

oh that's very interesting

star wars is great that's for sure

>>85237646

hah, good point. that could be true.

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>mfw I saw the first 6 movies before I was 7 years old and I loved Jar Jar and the Ewoks

>>85232319
What I do?

Star Wars has always been for the normies.

The first two films are fun, but not perfect.

>>85222510
okay, it's not exactly flying. Luke throws them off cliffs and force-lifts them part of the way, and just as they get excited about being able to fly, he drops them and laughs.

he's really bored.

>>85226692
what game? oh, that game you're pointing to in your room?

btw you need to switch the webcam on or we can't see you.

>>85223131
>Okay, so Greek theater had something called the "Citizens" who were more or less a collective character. They exist entirely to comment on the story or a character.

you mean the Chorus?

>>85224642
why does life smell like fish?

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>>85227458


sigh... Sheebla...

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>>85229722
hey, we came up with a small cute alien design, what do you think?

>>85231140
wryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

>>85236657

Jesus christ she looks fucking horrible in that video. No, I'm not talking about Carrie Fisher.