Ladies and gentlemen... I've traveled over half our site

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Ladies and gentlemen... I've traveled over half our site to be here tonight. I couldn't get away sooner because my new meme was coming in at /sp/ and I had to see about it. That meme is now flowing at two hundred replies and it's paying me an income of five (You)s an hour. I have two others bumping and I have sixteen baiting on /pol/. So, ladies and gentlemen... if I say I'm a meme man you will agree. You have a great chance here, but bear in mind, you can lose it all if you're not careful. Out of all anons that beg for a chance to shitpost your boards, maybe one in twenty will be meme-men; the rest will be redditors trying to get between you and the meme-men - to get some of the (You)s that ought by rights come to you. Even if you find one that has memes, and means to shitpost, he'll maybe know nothing about memeing and he'll have to hire out the job on a hotpocket contract, and then you're depending on a jannie that's trying to rush the job through so he can get another hotpocket just as quick as he can. This is the way this works.