ITT: things you do at the movie theatre >go to auditoriums

>cut hole in bottom of popcorn
>put my penis in the hole
>give it to some couple thats just walking in and tell them its free

>Cut hole in bottom of penis
>Put popcorn in the hole
>Give it to some couple that's just walking in and tell them it's free

>>83574721
>gather hair lice
>keep in a small jar/container
>get in theatre
>sprinkle lice on everyone in front

>cut holes in a couple that walks in
>put popcorn in the holes
>give them my penis for free

>>83574721
Why do you think anything of this? Nobody is going to accept it, they'll politely say "thanks" and toss it in the nearest trash when you're out of sight.

>>83575121
Why would you throw away free popcorn without trying it first? Are you paranoid?

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>I like to dump my candy into my popcorn and mix it around, so when you eat it you get a handful of sticky sweet flavored popcorn

>>83575175
Why on earth would you accept free popcorn from a stranger?

What's your typical concession stand order?

>hotdog
>nachos
>large iced tea or soda if iced tea isn't available

>>83575399
Fatass

>>83575320
Because its free popcorn

>>83575428
Wtf my feelings are hurt now?!

>>83574721
why does that picture exist. Who would create that picture. I hate it

>>83575320
Red blue icee and a watermelon sour patch

I cut a hole in the bottom of my soda, put my penis in and let my friends unknowingly jab a straw in my urethra

>>83575090
this is the only way to do it desu senpai

Popcorn without the extra butter on top.

I really really just like the taste of Flavacol

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>movie finishes
>go to the cashier and give them my long and thorough analysis on it
>they're working so they have to stand there and listen

>>83575583
You use a syringe to fill your urethra with soda beforehand right? Have to keep up the illusion

>>83575399
>Philly cheese steak
>Steak fries
>Hot wings
>Coke Icee

>>83575434
>>83575175
Maybe if you were an employee or didn't look like a fat autistic stuttering slob they wouldn't be suspicious of you, but I guarantee they do not eat the popcorn you give them.

>>83574721
pepe has become the new bachelor frog

>order something
>have a lengthy conversation with cashier before you hand him the money

>>83575696
Oops meant to reply to
>>83575617

>>83575650
Yeah, but you have to remember you friends preferences. This one time they started drinking and made a confused face and said "it's weird this tastes like diet" and I realized I fucked up by. It loading up with regular coke. Really ruined the moment

>>83575681
I don't know where you're getting this information from but I've never had a problem with accepting free food from a stranger. I think you just have autism and assume everyone else does too.

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>>83575617
I lost.
>mfw old people do this shit all the time to strangers, regardless of the situation

>>83575320
I won't even eat catered lunches at work if I don't get to it right away. People cough, sneeze, spit when they talk, drop hair, etc. There no way of telling how much DNA is on it after a short while.

>>83575667
God I can't imagine what a fatass you are.

>>83575650
Sometimes, I'll just let them suck the piss out and tell them I got Mello Yello, then they don't question it

>>83575696
>>83575617

thats fucked up

>>83575617
Made me lose my shit for 10 minutes straight, good thing I'm home

>>83575828
By consuming their DNA you strengthen your immune system.

You want to be strong dont you?

>>83575790
So some fat pedophile-looking /tv/ cunnyposter with grease stains on his shirt hands you and your girlfriend a bag of popcorn and forces a fake smile, and you take it and eat it?
Enjoy the semen flavored popcorn, it's your life you eat what you want. I don't take anything from someone I don't know unless it's still in the package.

>>83575399
>Half-rack of ribs (dripping wet, fuck dry rub)
>Creamed spinach
>Mac n cheese
>Two pieces of cornbread
>Large water

>>83575852
>let them suck the piss out and tell them I got Mello Yello


>Dude what the fuck did you put in my drink this tastes way too good to be mellow yellow

>>83575893
Unless of course you contract a shitty virus and are bedridden for a week with constant headaches and stomach cramps.

>>83575852
Sounds like you do it often.

You should just drill a hole through the base of your penis so when they shove a straw in your dickhead and suck it'll filter the soda through your dick and into their mouth

>>83575931
>I don't take anything from someone I don't know unless it's still in the package.
I usually won't even do that. I'm even hesitant to eat food in restaurants. Having worked in them, I know what goes on behind the scenes.

>>83575399
If I made that purchase at my local theater I'd have to go to the bank first and take out a small loan.

>>83575849
Yeah, and what do you get? Celery with some Luke warm water? It's called bulkin up, I doubt you'd know what that even means because I know fagtrons like you visibly strain when they lift their Starbucks cups. If I see you in my theater gym touching my weights, I'll fucking rape you

>>83575982
Dude you should just drill a hole through your prostate, so when they stick the straw up your penis, it comes out your ass

>>83576019
That's like 10 dollars tops at my local theater.

>>83576016
What goes on behind the scenes, anon?

>>83575931
what do you do if the person running the concession stand is a fat pedophile-looking /tv/ cunnyposter with grease stains on his shirt? asking for a friend.

>>83576049
But then they wouldn't have any soda going through the straw, dumbass.

>>83576022
>t. fat sack of shit lard ass

>>83576182
Ask where Robert is

>>83576180
Spit, cum, heavy drinking, drug use. Dropping shit on the floor and still serving it. Nicking your hand in a commercial lettuce grinder or meat slicer, and not throwing away the blood contaminated batch of food.

>>83576182
You can usually see everything they're doing so it's not as big a deal. As long as he doesn't put his bare hands on my food it's fine.

>>83574721
>buy a ticket
>watch movie
>ask friend/friends I'm with what the thought of the movie
>take a piss
>go home

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>sit right next to the exit of the theater
>when the movie ends let out a disgusting fart
>laugh as everyone is forced to walk through my cloud of anguish

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>>83575090

>>83576449
How do you guarantee your fart will be disgusting

>>83576661
anticipate my arrival to the movie theater by having a putrid meal earlier in the day

>>83576701
What do you eat. I want to hear in detail.

>>83576763
scrambled eggs fried in butter with onions

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>>83576442
Absolute degeneracy

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>go to restrooms in middle of the kino
>rub shit all over
>forced to close down bathroom for cleaning
>normies come out having to piss but cant
>have to share with the woman's bathroom
>get to the stall first so i can fap to the womens feet under the stall next to mine
>wipe on toilet paper roll when finished

>>83576880
>not shitting in your hand and flinging turd catapults into the stall next to you

top pleb

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>>83576816
Eat several bowls of Kashi cereal in the morning, it has tons of fiber and will make you fart like crazy.
Then eat a whole shitload of garlic, onions, cheese, eggs and hot spices for the smell.

This will produce a constant supply of disgusting, putrid farts that you can release anytime you please and assault the normies' nostrils at your very whim.

>>83577096
What type of kashi

>>83576880
>>83576946
>not shitting in the soap dispenser so that when the normies go to wash their hands they get shit all over them