>receive a distress call in the dead of space >"West

Xenomorphs were made by an android that was connected to VERIZON WIRELESS

>>83540288
>be tasked to write a new Alien movie
>take a shit on a piece of paper

>>83540288
>DUDE LETS ALTER OUR ENTIRE MISSION AND DESTINATION TO SETTLE OUR entire COLONY ON THIS UNKNOWN PLANET WE KNOW LITTLE ABOUT
>LMAO

>>83540521
but i don't want to get back in the stasis pod! isn't that enough reason to divert this multi trillion dollar mission?

>>83540288
It was a disjointed film. Not a total wreck, but it felt like 3 movies smashed together.

does scott have a diseased mind?

>>83541400
The only people who think it's truly awful is the alien fanbase who have exposed themselves as the most childish fandom in existence

>>83541377
>job is to go out and explore
> go out and explore

Wow what a fucking embarrassment

>>83541377
>I don't want to do the thing of which I was genetically engineered to do!

>>83540521
>be super religious and shitty leader
>find planet that appears to exceed all wildest expectations of possible colony site
>talk about the importance of adapting to the situations at hand
>can be inferred he thinks it is a sign from God

There are plenty of questionable motives in the Alien franchise, this is hardly one of them.

>>83542620
>be super religious
>be good at science

lmaoooo

I love this movie and promethesu! I hope they make more!

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>>83540288
Covenant pissed me off because it ruined my fanfiction

>>83542649
I thought they were decent, but I doubt they will make more. It is not pulling in enough money. I think it has effectively killed Alien 5. Which may actually be a good thing.

>>83542689
>It's the perfect organism.

>>83542620
Athiest here, pretty sure the (new) leader was non-religious

>>83542713
To hug

>>83542726
Watched the film like 30 minutes ago, and he talks about how the only reason he wasn't given command originally was because he was a man of faith.

>>83542689
Does the alien vagina have another, smaller vagina inside of it that pops out and grips your dick tighter?

>>83542767
Fuck yes it does.
>tfw no qt ayy gf to suck you off with her vagina mouth

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I went and saw this movie today

It was 7:15pm on a Saturday

There were only two other people there

I think this franchise might be kill

>>83542812
>dick sucked by mini vagina
>deep throated by second mini-mouth
>tail up ass

They fuck like they kill, gratuitously.

>>83542846
BRAVO SCOTT
R
A
V
O

>>83540288
>be out in the middle of no where in space
>hear "West Virginia Mountain Momma"
>parasitic alien embryo violently bursts through my throat
>such is the life of a company employee

>>83540288
>west virginia mountain momma
do you mean "country roads, take me home" by john denver you faggot

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>>83540288
>Land on planet to investigate distress call
>Walking around an alien jungle
>Fortunate Son starts playing

>>83542966
I think they were purposely trying to pull motifs from Alien's.

>proceeds to fight Xenomorph with space construction equipment.

>>83542933
it's a meme you dip

I feel like nobody cared about this movie

The people who made it, I mean

Like I can't imagine Ridley Scott stepping back after watching the final cut and being like "I made a great movie."

It's just kinda...there. I didn't hate it, but it didn't do much. It was like a mediocre 2-hour long season finale for a tv show.

>>83540521
Not wrong to at least investigate the planet, though I figure actually settling there may piss people off back on earth

>>83543101
Oh really I had no idea they let you on set! Such amazing insight!!

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>>83540288
>Covenant generally refers to the first five books of the Bible
>Alien Covenant is technically the fifth Alien movie

>>83541444
Someone made the very good point that early Ridley didn't pander to audiences, but now he does, and his movies suffer for it.

"You want aliens, I'll give you aliens", instead of sticking to his guns and continuing from Prometheus.

>>83542933
John Denver created the Xeno's...that's why she sent the message.

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>>83540288
DUDE WHEAT

>>83540288
pic looks like something you'd see under a microscope

I like that not only do they wander around without suits, but they do it after landing in water. I'm pretty sure wandering around the fluids of an alien planet unprotected is even more of a bad idea than wandering around the land.

>>83543124
>it takes literally months/years to get anywhere via space travel
>get to location of beacon
>decide SHIT SON GOTTA GO NOW instead of just waiting out the storm and investigating under ideal conditions

>>83543598
That was one of the things that bothered me most. It was like them taking off their helmets in Prometheus.

>>83543489
This is a funny meme, but you do know it was the Engineers that cultivated the wheat.

>>83543598
That was my first thought. Yeah, it might have breathable air, but what about microbes? What about deadly alien insects that could sting you? What about toxins from plants? Spores?

>>83543685
I feel like the whole spore thing could have been avoided entertierly. Have them meet up with David and while he appears friendly at first, he begins to sabatoge them and infect them with the goo.

>>83543851
Seems like it was a concept that someone came up with and really wanted in the film. Definitely could have been done without it. But it is something memorable to go with. Better than dog xenonorph.

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>>83540288
>watches the sunrise with his girlfriend and confesses his love
>"Kantori Roodo, konomichi zuuto yukeba" starts playing

>>83541377
>but i want to play videogames and masturbate all day! isn't that reason enough to divert this multi million years of evolution?
Go lift and get a gf, faggot.

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>>83540474
underrated