>its a Truman goes to LIttle Caesars so often that the manager

>>83522239
sounds comfy

Why do the LC cashiers always give me dirty looks when I ask for the fresh pizza they just put in the Hot'n'Ready oven cabinet instead of the old one they try to give me

>>83522239
I just ate half a pizza that I ordered from Dominos as part of their "free pizza after X amount of shekels you give us" thingy. Should I feel bad about this?

>>83522239
>pre-pay
how would they know how many pizzas he would eat, and at what prices? what about the drinks and dressings?
the bill he would be a rough estimate

to show real trust in truman the manager would tell him that he would be given a bill at the end of the month(s) so that they wouldn't have to calculate and estimate for the price

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>It's a Truman drinks an entire bottle of Blackberry Brandy and passes out only to wake up 5 hours later, flip out of his bed and pop open his microwave on the floor and vomit inside of it, close it, vomit some on the carpet, get back in bed, vomit a bit there too, and go back to sleep only to wake up 3 hours later to the horror that awaits him episode.

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>It's a "Truman becomes more and more interested in Shia Islam and decides to celebrate the Day of Ashura, but during the Tatbir he hits his back with a sword too hard and almost dies of severe blood loss and deep muscle cuts before the producers are able to get him to a hospital" episode

What the fuck were they thinking? Why didn't anybody tell him that the Ayatollah Khamenei recommends people donate blood and not perform flagellation?

>>83522908
Congrats now you've learned what everyone except really dumb women know,

Don't Drink Flavored Alcohol

>>83522845
Autism makes him order the same pizza every day

>>83522908
>It's a Truman reposts an at least six month old story on /tv/

>>83522845
>buying sodas at a pizza place

Truman may be autistic but he isn't fucking stupid. $3 for a 2-liter at Pizza Hut is dumb when he can just go to the grocery store next door and buy it for $1

>>83522943
That was a weird episode, but the circumcision episode nearly made the internet explode.

>>83522943
Amir Farhad pls go

>>83522239
>it's a "Truman shills just for fun for a candidate in the upcoming election for Mayor of his town and is accused by the other camp as being a foreigner force that writes words on the internet to make other people think that his candidate is the good person, all this despite the other candidate is a criminal and a liar in a non funny way like his candidate" episode.

>>83522239
To be honest if I discovered the whole world was watching me as a reality TV for my entire life I would just kill myself.
>they saw me masturbate
>they saw me never washing hands after shitting at home
>they saw me binge eat and drink while crying over my ex
>they saw me trying to kill myself and pussy out every time

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>>83522943
Shias are like all those folks who chose to become muslim but not really

I wish Ēranshahr just became a Zoroastrian empire again

>>83523087
>they saw me never washing hands after shitting at home

this is the worst one

you are a fucking degenerate and I hope you know that. you are not normal. you are repulsive

>>83523013
>bringing drinks from outside to a restaurant

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>>83523087
>they saw me never washing hands after shitting at home

>>83523232
>eating at the restaurant in the first place

>>83523087
>They saw me masturbating after shitting at home
The fuck dude.

>it's a Truman finds an old picture of his mom in a bikini while she was pregnant with him and takes it into the bathroom to jack off to it

That was an awkward family dinner for all involved

>>83523362
In retrospect, excusing himself to do it in the middle of dinner wasnt a good idea.
And the fact that his erection didn't soften a bit when his uncle caught him was concerning

>>83522341
Because it means they have to throw the old one out.

>>83523232
>eating pizza at a pizza place instead of taking it home

are you baiting me right now?

>>83523536
You seriously take it home?

>>83523280
>>83523536
>wanting people to know that you're going to be eating a pizza all by yourself and that you're too lazy to make food yourself

>>83522569
Why are you ordering dominos, or are you drunk

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>>83523583

>>83523583
>call in your order
>get there
>pay for it, it's already in your hands and there's no wait
>sit down at the table and start eating

do you seriously do this? I need to know

>its a Truman has jacked it to porn for so many years that he literally has nothing resembling an IRL sex drive but he despises goon encouragement porn still episode
Hits too close to home

>>83523583
I'm not going to be stripping down to my underwear and getting baked anywhere else, bruh

>>83522239
>It's a Truman has nothing to do for the rest of the weekend so he's just going to get drunk and eat frozen pizzas episode

>>83523087
>they saw me never washing hands after shitting at home

hey man, where are having some fun here with silly things we do and you come here with this disgusting shit.

not cool.

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>>83523659
>>83523725
Why wouldn't I?
>no wait
>pizza is nice and hot
>getting out of the house
>use their parmesean and peppers instead of my own
>unlimited refills

>>83523725
>walking in knowing everyone's silently judging you from behind your back as they think it's below you to be dining there among them

>it's a Truman has death gripped his dick and can't cum inside a woman episode
>it's a Truman spends his weekend looking at worldstar hiphop

>it's a truman discusses with his mom because of money episode
>truman is going out to buy a six pack now

>>83523805
does it really matter, though?
as long as no shit touches your hands it's fine. even if you do get it on your hands, don't worry, it's only dead bacteries

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>>83523087
>they saw me never washing hands after shitting at home

>>83523842
I dont understand why lasting longer bugged Truman so much

>>83523641
I actually like it better than any other pizza place in my town.

>>83524000
perhaps he didn't find it pleasureable at all? perhaps he's not straight

>>83523087
>they saw me mastrubate while shitting on my ex

wowza

>>83523641
their pan pizza is pretty good desu
>>83524000
I think Truman doesn't have a problem with lasting longer but was more angered by the fact he fucks for hours and still can't climax. I seen every episode where he cums in less than five minutes fapping to porn

>It's a Truman spends all night on /pol/ talking about how much he hates niggers episode

>its a Truman edges to THAT for hours again and then sobs softly as he searches Google for any sort of scientific opinion article that tells him he's not a monster episode

>>83524000
that episode where Truman's girlfriend was riding him for like 5 mins and he had to reach down and feel if he was even still hard because he literally had no sense of feeling from the sex was pretty interesting though

>>83523956
>it's only dead bacteries
No, it isn't only dead "bacteries" as you say it, there are many fecal-orally transmitted diseases. E-Coli, for instance. For the love of your fellow man, wash your filthy shit covered hands

>>83524319
>shit covered hands
it's only some spots at worst

no one I've met have died, so it's not harmful
i only eat food that's of quality and not passed the best before date

the same goes for drinks

>its a Truman finally decides to strangle his wife in the middle of the night after years of internal hatred and days of just watching her sleep leading to Marlon kicking down the door and running up the stairs shouting if Truman wants to have a beer with him episode

>>83524826
I'm not trying to be rude here, but it doesn't matter how good your diet is, you can still spread diseases and parasites if you don't wash your hands after handling feces. Anyways, you'll agree at least that it doesn't do any harm to wash your hands.

>>83524911
it costs water, soap, time. who knows what long term damage the chemicals in the soap would do to your hands?

ive read that washing your hair too often would dry it out and thus be damaging. I don't want my hands cracking up

>>83523087
>>they saw me never washing hands after shitting at home
You do know that the FBI monitors this website right?..

>>83523092
>tfw no friendly banter wars between Christendom and Zoroastriandom anymore
Muslims ruin everything