OKAY so me and the boys just got back from babewatch 2017(Baywatch™)

WEW! XD Thanks, pal. Seems I can't go five minutes without a #Baywatch FAN tracking me down and thanking me for the laughs (and the soaked through shorts XD). Mahalo, brotha. #BAYWATCH #ShortageOfShorts #BuyStockInAdultDiapers

This is getting out of hand Dwayne

Look at how much effort you put into this shitty attempt at being funny.

>>83400309
>ctrl+v
>"effort"

>>83400309
Frick off HATER that was an AMAZING post and it really gave me GOOD VIBES and managed to communicate how FUN and how much of LAID BACK NO STRESS GOOD TIME THE BAYWATCH MOVIE IS

oh this thread gettin litty!

My kino clitty is getting litty for this film, what do I think about it?

>>83400188
>asian dude getting revived because he can't swim
umm racist much?????

File: image.jpg (27KB, 400x259px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 400x259px

>>83400188
Just got back from seeing BAYWATCH with my crew. We roll pretty deep and let me tell you, not a dry seat in the house. The piss was intense. Piss dripping out the seats, piss flowing down the aisles, piss in the popcorn. Piss jets in every direction. I actually shit myself three times, I told the door monkey and he was like "Aww here goes" and we fist bumped. It was all a good vibe. Great night out and if you roll with a chill crew and not a bunch of permavirgin goobers then you'll have a wicked sick time. SLAYED.

>>83400309
this, dwayne is one of /ourguys/ and is out of bounds. he is positive, funny and legit. these memesters have got it all wrong.... :"DD

>>83400309
>when the post isn't litty

>>83400188

> Only 1 litty.

Alternating caps was good, but 4/10 is the best i can do.

>>83400188
WOW i thought this movie cant be that funny, no way am i REALLY gonna piss myself. But as soon as the movie started i had this unstoppable urge to piss, i kept it in for as long as i could until finally the piss started blasting the ceiling of the theater and raining down on everyone.

It was ok though cause everyone else was pissing too, there was piss everywhere. Highly recommend the movie if you like piss and want to have a GOOD TIME :)

This is one of the FUNNEST franchises in history! Seriously each minute following the Rock and his pals from Emerald Bay as they get into assorted RAUNCHY situations has been more hysterical than the last. Aside from the FANS loving it , the audiences only consistency has been its lack of bladder control and ineffective use of criticism, all to make movies FUN, to make R-RATINGS seem RAUNCHY.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rock vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; he made sure the movie would never be mistaken for an out of touch serious film that meant anything to anybody? Just ridiculously litty RAUNCHY summer FUN. Baywatch might be anti-kid (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-critics film in its refusal of snooze, dullness and g-rated fun. No critic wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>b-but the critical reception is fair
"No"
The criticism is dreadful; their opinions are terribly out of touch. As I read, I noticed that every time a critic marked it negatively, the author wrote instead that the jokes "fell flat."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Critc's minds are so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that they has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Wonder Woman by the same critic. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are watching Wonder Woman at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to watch Buzzfeed." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you watch "Wonder Woman" you are, in fact, trained to watch Buzzfeed, and that's not litty at all.