THEY RUINED THE DARK TOWER HOLY SHIT I WAS SO EXCITED TOO WHAT

whats wrong honey

More like apeshit

>>82336918
*rolls eyes and smirks*

awww, are your little whiteboi fee fees hut because the made the MC into a scary black man?

>>82336918
>The man in black...he's like the white devil right?
>DAS RITE
Who wrote this stuff?

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>>82336943

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>Idris Elba
>Matthew McConaughey
>Katheryn Winnick

>>82336996
Nothing to do with that I was actually EXCITED about Idris

>>82336918
It looks 3000 times better than the books.
It looks like a simple story told simply which was all The Dark Tower series should've been, since all the rest was stupid filler wrote badly.

Tell me what the fuck was the point of Mordred, or Walter after the first book, or the Crimson King as a whole, I fucking dare you.

>>82337067
I double dare YOU!

>>82337066
Which I was not, but I really loved him in the trailer. Pretty hyped

Trailer was great! Another role for the black man! :) cry about it, whitey, nobody cares!

>>82337124
Thats not the problem.

>>82337175
Er.. *blinks* Never said it was! Only racists think there is anything wrong with white roles being given to others.

Stephen King books are for plebs, as is all genre fiction. Get some taste and stop crying about an adaptation which might make King's drivel halfway bearable.

>>82336943
lmao

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Reminder

Call me a pedo but I want a beautiful Jake, and it's not gonna happen.

>>82339375
Not only you're a pedophile you're also a homosexual. Shame.

>>82340722
>homo
nah, liking boys is literally hetero. it would be gay if i wanted to fuck a big masculine dude with a beard.

anyway I don't want to fuck jake, just see a beautiful boy on screen.

A E S T H E T I C S

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>>82336943

Why do people here think Elba plays "SHEEEEIT NIGGA" roles? He's the exact opposite of African-American trash

>>82341894
doesn't matter, he's a cuck

>>82336918
What's wrong with Idris Elba?
At least it wasn't Will Smith or Jaime Foxx.

>>82341912
Do you even know what the word means?

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>>82336943

>>82341894
I actually liked Elba in Thor. He's just a dude. I dunno how the racism works in Dark Tower now the racist is black, but if they make him racist against whites and people comment on that, then watch /tv/ love the film and /pol/ go "IS THIS A REDPILL FILM? :O!"

>>82341894
Funny because the only role he will ever truly be remembered for is Stringer.

>>82342024
Roland was never a racist. Odetta was. She is a black woman and that was part of what made her relationship with Roland interesting. Now they either have to completely rewrite her character, whitewash her and make her a racist white hillbilly or leave out that aspect of her character entirely.

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>>82336943
good one bro racism is the future

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>>82336918

>>82342145
There is no Detta or Eddie.

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>>82336943

>>82342257
Black twitter's really going downhill

>>82336943
LOVING

E
V
E
R
Y

LAUGH

>>82336918
> excited about a black-stained film produced by sony

Dumbass

>BRRRRRRRRMMMMMMM
>[generic action line]
>BRRRRRRRRMMMMMMM
>[generic action line]
>From the writer of Batman Forever, Batman & Robin, I Robot and I Am Legend

Ruined the plot
Ruined the tone
Ruined the characters

It's over. Dark Tower is finished.

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>>82336918
>movie by sony
>hyped

>>82336918
Brought to you by the same guy who fucked up I am Legend and I Robot

>>82342731
>It's over. Dark Tower is finished

Finally! Into the thinny we go

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>>82337054
>Katheryn winnick

>>82342867
He's going to fuck up Fables too

Mr. Bone's Wild Ride never ends

>>82336918

>They ruined the dark tower

Can't ruin it when the source material was garbage.

>>82336918
its sony
what did you expect?

>>82336943
LOL YOU SAW THE ACTORS SKIN COLOUR AND MADE A JOKE ABOUT IT HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA NICE ONE BRO

-BROFISTS YOU THROUGH THE INTERWEBS-

NICE EPIC I LIKE IT

>>82343056

>le mad nigger detected

>>82343056
Why do niggers get so riled up about the most insignificant things?

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>>82343056

inb4 they make the black woman who is supposed to be racist white now because Roland is black and it's the year 2017

>Those Muslims Roland fights

I guess they are supposed to be the mutants close to when he drops Jake to pursue the Tower, yes?

>>82336918
>MC created in the image of Clint Eastwood
>played by a nigger

USA is worse than Sweden.

>>82343447
Wouldn't go that far, hollywood might as well be Sweden though

This is what they should have done

The Gunslinger and Drawing of the Three as Movie 1
Wastelands, Movie 2
Wolves of the Calla, Movie 3
Song and DT, Movie 4

Wizard and Glass takes the form of stories Roland tells the ka-tet as they journey.

There, I just fixed Sony's fucked movies for them.

haha thats ok dude, we all make mistakes every now and then, head up and lets move on together :)

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If only there was someone who looked like young Clint Eastwood to be perfect for the role. Sadly he's not a minority.

The funniest thing is that it somehow manages to be even worse than the work print.

>>82343517
This, how do you fuck it up. Open with Roland wrecking that town and chasing the man in black, introduce Jake early on as a red herring and have him die at some point. What the shit are they doing now?

>>82343572
word is he can't act for shit

>>82343660
He already starred in shit ton of movies and he can't do worse than Elba. Not to mention that there is 0 emotion in Roland's character, all he has to do is look like a badass cowboy.

>>82343711
As much as this instance of black-washing sickens me, elba is a decent actor at the very least, better of an actor than scott eastwood without question

>>82343517
no, instead of movies, they should have taken the project to HBO and done a series. They could have stretched it out for 20-30 hour long episodes

>>82343764
Even if he is better actor he is still worse for this role. And he is not a really good actor so difference isn't huge anyway.

>>82343777
HBO would the same except have more sex.

>>82343777
I'd be ok with this IF it was one or two writers.

None of this bullshit with 50 fucking writers each one doing their little fanfic self-insert until we wind up with a big pile of mush by the end.

>>82343870
well, I'm sure Matthew was on board this movie as a producer, just like he was in True Detective. Imagine The Dark Tower done by the same crew that did season 1, only with a bigger budget. Character development, people talking for more than two minutes before another action scene.

I thought the book was about this alien world, or at least about some historical point in time in our world.
Why does it seem like they are in modern day USA?

>>82344995
Mid-World is not Earth. But it was clearly, at one time, home to a highly advanced society with high technology.

At the time of the novels it is in decline, with the literal ground turning to poison in many places. The society has reverted to feudalism.

It's unspecified how this happened or how long it took.

Jake isn't going to die is he?

>>82343239
Oh no. This is exactly whats going to happen isnt it?

>>82343239
>>82345103
She should still call him a cracker though.

Why did they make him use an American accent? Why isn't he wearing a hat?

>>82345091
Nigga, we ain't even getting Oy

>>82345164
The sad part is that this movie is so clearly going to bomb so we'll never get a sequel

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>>82336943

>>82336943
pretty much this

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DAMN RANDALL LOOKS LIKE THAT NOW
WHAT HAPPENED

>>82345127

He doesn't have a hat in the beginning of book one, either. That's pretty much the only character detail they got right.

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>>82345314
Yeah Randall is the one who had a shocking re-imagining.

>>82345364
Aside from being black, he's almost exactly the same

>>82345410
Him being black is literally the least of this movie's problems.

>>82345410
Yeah a horse is pretty much just a tall donkey right? So why even use horses?

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>>82345410

>>82345449
A round-wheel carriage drawn by donkeys is better than a square-wheeled carriage drawn by horses.

Too bad we got that square-wheeled donkey carriage.

I'm just surprised that we're getting the Crimson King and the Tower's beam shit actually in the movie

>>82345526
The Beams are pivotal to the plot. They are both the thing holding the Tower together and the means to navigate to the Tower.

>>82345681
Yeah, in the books
They've already half-assed so much about the setting that I expected them to gloss over the details

>>82345494
>A metaphor with an allegory is more effective than a figurative allegory with imagery

Learn this. Your comment is stupid.

>Roland's guns are literal magic with glowing runes
Wow
Way to miss the fucking point

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>>82336918

>>82342025
> Fucking pleb that never watched Luther his break out role

>>82345738
Are you really that dumb that you can't figure out what I was trying to say?

>>82345059
Mid-World is just a part of Roland's world not even the name of the whole one. Why the fuck every second ignorant fuckface forgets it?

>>82343821
Get the fuck outta here. Elba has that one thing that 99% of actors don't have : charisma that greatle enhance his screen presence. He always gave good perfomances.

>>82342996
if Fables gets something live action, I'll cry
If its crap, I'll murder somebody
so tell me it's not true.

>>82345998
It's been a while since I read the series but isn't Midworld not part of anyone world but like the mashed up parts of dying worlds as they all Move On?
Like debris mixing together as it circles the drain

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>>82336943

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>>82346098

>>82345998
It's still not Earth

>>82346133
The main world called All-World. All we know that it consists of 3 major regions if you can even call them this way. In-Wolrd - the place where Gilead was. Mid-Wolrd - The main part of the whole world with ruins of great cities and stuff like that. And End-Wolrd - complete wasteland with Tower in the moddle of it. There are also 2 frontiers between these regions: 1st one near the Great Desert and 2nd one with Callas.

>>82346309
No shit.

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>>82346247

Well damn, something else to disappoint me in a few years.

Maybe it'll go through development hell and land in the hands of someone worth a fuck.

>>82345999
Stop acting like "charisma" is some kind of a quantifiable thing that applies to every role.

>>82346463
It does though

Look at the guy who played Quicksilver in Age of Ultron or the main dude in Godzilla

He has no "charisma" regardless of his role.
Some actors have presence and others don't.
It's important for every major role.

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>>82336918
>I WAS SO EXCITED TOO

If you were excited after they cast Idris Elba and made virtue signalling part of their movie campaign you deserve to have your face rubbed in excrement.

>>82337094
Probably because idris is a based melanin actor.

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This is your Jake now.

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>>82336943

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>>82336943

>>82342145

They change like 5 lines in the series. It'll be okay

>>82344178

>people taking for more than 2 minutes before another action scene
>anon says, after having only watched a trailer

>>82345841

They're literally magic though

>>82345998

I think even Stephen King fucks up at some point and calls the whole thing Mid World

They only really use All World once or twice in reference to Arthur Eld

>>82348077

It's just a gun. Yeah it's made from the metal of Excalibur, but I don't recall that having any powers either. The scabbard could heal wounds, but if Arthur Eld follows King Arthur's general lore then it's long gone.